Friday 21st February 2020

Zulu: NgoLwesihlanu, ngoFebhuwari 21, 2020

From 23:10hrs: I kept waking, having a mini-thought-storm and nodding off again repeatedly. My EQ, telling me to go back to sleep each time? And I did!

02:00hrs: This time, when I woke, there was no mind-storm, and the damned ‘Hum’ seemed to be so much more noticeable and loud! The innards abruptly started to churn and rumble. Shoulder-Shuddering-Shirley and Shaking Shaun almost shook me out of the £300, second-hand recliner! That was the end of any thoughts of going back to kip again, although the body wanted to, the twisted-tormented mind decided it needed the body to rise up for a wee-wee. So I got up!

Not an easy task this morning, with Shirley and Shaun, shivering and shaking away with a high degree of determination. Using the walking stick was farcical, even comical, as I leapt all over the place. I nearly had myself over a few times, dropped the Four-Pronger and almost lost my balance. All within the few steps to the GPWWB (Grey-Plastic-Wee-Wee-Bucket), where I had an SBTSDWS (Started-Blasting-out-Then-Stopped-Dead-Within-Seconds) wee-wee. T’was then I realised the time and remembered all the waking-ups, and scribbled some notes adding to the list of reminders.

I took the bucket for decontamination, cleaning and freshening-up. Which is just as well I did, cause when in the wet room, the stomach gave out a puff from the rear end, and I had to drop-em, and down on the Porcelain Throne sharpish! Oh, dear, things went very similar to yesterdays first visit! I had no control over the movement, it was one long grinding, painful, bloody session! A giant, solid torpedo was evacuated. Kerplunk – Splash! The relief made me sigh with pleasure, Tsk! So, the two Sennas I took after yesterday’s  H-bomb release, had done nothing to ease the situation then? I got the bucket, Throne, and myself cleaned up and medicated.

I took three pictures of the pins, in different settings with the Nikon. The auto was nearest to how they appeared to my eyes. I’ll use Auto in future whenever I shoot the legs.

To the kitchen, Shirley and Shaun still in attendance, me wobbling about a bit, instead of the usual hobbling. (Hahaha!) I got the kettle on and took the medications, with two Senna tablets this time. The ‘Hum’ still belting away, no alternating of tone, on with a constant, horribly annoying rasping, resonating drone, that was really getting on my goat for some reason today? Made the brew. Pondering over whether to have porridge, biscuits or pot-noodle for brekkers – the innards gave off a silent, discrete, microscopic phut of wind from the rear end – believe me, no one could have considered eating with the acrid aroma that the escapage left behind! Cor!

I got on the computer, accompanied by the ‘Hum’! I made a start on this blog first, up to here, while the memories remained and I could still decipher some of the notes I’d made. Then began on updating the Thursday post.

Flopping ‘eck, six hours later I got it done! Splenetic-Spitting!

About done in now. I went to the kitchen to get a brew of tea and sort out what medications I had missed or not.

I later found this photograph on the SD card, but taking it is another mystery. Why?

Back on the computer, Pinterest, and TFZer Facebooking, then actually got some graphics done for the diary. But it cost me a few more hours. And occasional visits from Shaking-Shoulder-Shirley, felt like the joint would either come out of its socket or freeze up in pain. She’s certainly left me with a sore shoulder! I must mention this to the Doctor on Wednesday.

The only thing I was capable of, was making a meal, and I felt so in need of food. I don’t know why suddenly? But I spent a lot of time (Perhaps it was because I knew I had to stay awake for the delivery of the socks and coathangers?), preparing and making the meal look good. (Haha!) The black tomatoes were really-good as I moved the tray to the recliner and got sat down, dish on the knees, and the moment I took the first mouthful, the intercom flashed and rang! 

Well, I fumbled out of the chair, got the food tray on the Ottoman, fumbled to get up, nearly tripped over the waste bin as I made it to the intercom panel, and I pressed the wrong button, and lost contact with the caller! I saw an image of his stomach for a second or two before I accidentally cut him off! 

I got some trousers on, to go down to let the bloke in, I was panicking a bit. But as I left the flat, the delivery lad arrived at the door. He was kind enough of my Accifauxpas in cutting him off on the intercom. Thanks mate!

He left the box inside the door for me. I left it there, and I returned to the front room and the now cold meal. And ate it all up, but the enjoyment was marred. Flavour Rating, 6/10.

I was doing the washing up, and the sharp serrated knife (thank you Nicodemus Neurotrammiter!) slipped from my grasp, hit the drainer and bounced towards the floor. I actually remember feeling a little chuffed with myself for getting out of the way rather nattily and avoiding the blade, I thought! But, could I find the mysteriously vanished knife to retrieve it? Nope! Well, not for ages. I actually moved this bin above several times in the search for the blade. I spot it, a long time later. Surprising, the knife fell in the optimum place to be camouflaged perfectly! Hahaha!

As I got down in the £300 second-hand, rickety recliner, I had a bit of the mixed bag of ailments all come on at the same time, and until I woke in the morning, everything is hazy, missing or forgotten.

♫ Things ain’t what they used to be ♫