Inchcocksi – Saturday 25th July 2020: Chinwagless! Humph!

TFZer Beauty Marie, (with Inchcock showing interest!) Haha!

Saturday 25th July 2020

Dutch: Zaterdag 25 Juli 2020

01:30hrs: I stirred gently and slowly into imitation-life. Rather surprisingly, not needing a wee-wee?

The brain wasn’t all that interested in operational duties for a while. I disentangled my over-stomached body from the second-hand, c1968 rickety recliner. That my xyrophobia suffering, over amour propred Brother-in-law Pete broke, when he was searching the flat while I was in the hospital with the Stroke, and taking my valuables, he took a rest. Fatal! He could not resist the electrics, and Pete played with them. Now the recliner no longer works! 

I caught my balance (it wasn’t too good this morning for some unbeknown reason). And wobbled off to the kitchenette, almost on auto-pilot. I got the kettle on and did the health checks. The BP SYS as a little high again. Sorted the small tablets out and identified the Furesomide and removed it (At least I hope I got it right). Took the medications and was drinking the mug of Glengettie tea and wondering if it was worth trying to take an early morning photo if the dark, dank view outside.

  Then, with surprising suddenness, I had to hobble-hastily to the EOGPB (Emergency-Overnight-Grey-Plastic-Bucket). A bit of a blaster-mode this wee-wee was! And a long one too! There was none of the PMPD (Post-Micturition Pre-Dribble). Still, a plentiful supply of embarrassing PMAD (Post-Micturition After-Dribbling), so much of it, I nearly started counting the cracks on the ceiling, while I whistled! Unfortunately, it caught me out, a few drops of late-dibbling took place. In-Depth-Ignominy-Mode-Engaged!

Then, the innards gave me a poke, which told me I needed to get to the Porcelain Throne, which I did, without any delay. The most painful for weeks affair! But it was not a long job, no bleeding, and aroma didn’t make me feel hazy this time. Hahaha!

The toes and feet for worse than yesterday morning, of course, the nails were longer. And the fungal nail infection on the right foot was more evident. More painful too!

I silently prayed that the St Anns podiatrist will see to me on Monday and not refuse to do-me, because of my ailments (Issues, they call them), like they did, last August! I’m not confident about this in the least.

I took the opportunity to change the PP’s. Knowing that I will need to replace them again when I do the ablutions, I put on one of the smaller ones I had to hand, for the time being. I hope I don’t get any Diabetes Insipidus leaks, or Little Inchies fungal lesion bleeds in between!

The brain was working again, as well as it ever will methinks, and a determination to get the updating done rose forth! Three wee-wees (each of the LPT (Long-Persistent-Type), two cups of Thompsons Punjana tea, and hours later, I finished the updating. Phew!

It was looking a little bleak out there. But no rain yet awhile.

I posted the Friday blog to WordPress, Emailed the links, and went on Facebooking catch-up, and that took me over two hours! Then onto the WordPress Reader section. Pinteresting. Time to get the ablutions done, back in a while.

I’m back!

The ablution session was sorrowfully a painful one,  but entertaining! Hehe!

  • The teeth cleaning went well, no bleeding, Toothache Thomas was only mildly bothersome!
  • Putting the tube and brush back on the side-trolley. The exact moment my right hand steadied the trolley for me to reach over to return the stuff to the tray with my good left hand, Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley gave me a good rattling, and the trolley wet over! Isn’t it amazing how much stuff you can squeeze into and onto a bathroom tray? It took me yonks to retrieve it all! Cragnangles!
  • The shaving consisted of far too many dropsies. Razors repeatedly, after-shave (used as a bleeding-stopper) and the foam can twice.
  • And on another occasion, I was shaking the can of foam, and off it flew via the North wall, back down, off of the sink and onto the sock-glide, hit the shower tiles, landed and rolled gently back to my feet and stopped, like a trained little dog! This was the entertaining part. I had to smile at it! Haha!
  • As I got into the shower, I tripped on the mat I had only myself to blame, I’d not left it in the usual position I do when showering. Pillock!
  •  The showering itself was almost perfect! No dizzies, no banging into the grab-bars, no dropping the showerhead, and the curtains didn’t get stuck on closing them! T’was good! I felt good at the time!
  • Furthermore, no toe-stubbings, throughout the whole showering operation!
  • Drying off my baby rhinoceros jelly-like flabby-bellied body was incident and escapade-free!
  • I’ll not go into detail on this one, to embarrassing; I had severe bother when I used Little Inchies fungal lesion cream, on Harold’s Haemorrhoids! Suffice to say, Blubber-Argh! Grigglecocks! I have now moved the Phimosis Plato, and Paraphimosis Patrick’s clobetasone butyrate corticosteroid cream out of the way! I must remember where to, so I’ll mention where it was placed here – Inchcock: It’s on the bottom tray on wetroom trolley! Try not to forget, mush!
  • The old legs didn’t look too bad.

The dreaded ‘Hum’ was getting so loud again, as I started on doing this blog. I persistently persisted, and got as far as here, and had to go on CorelDraw again to get some graphics done in advance.

Oh, no, I’d better do the template first. I must get caught up for Monday, which I anticipate being a busy day, full of frustrations at the Health Centre, and no time to get much computerisationing done! Done it, back to CorelDrawing!

By Jimminy, the rain cometh down now!

I had some tap-tapping and knock-knocking noises from above to keep me company.

The familiar post meridian weariness and drainage of enthusiasm, frolicsomeness, and will-to-bother came over me, and I decided to get a meal made up then get in the recliner, in search of Sweet Morpheus.

Well, the nosh was a super-tasty one! Beef pasty, potatoes, egg mayonnaise, beetroot & carrot,  tomatoes, and a mini-pork & pickle pie. An individual lemon mousse and apple pie to follow. I lip-smackingly enjoyed this effort!

Washed the pots, and settled into the £300, second-hand, c1968, not-working, uncomfortable, rickety recliner. I felt so tired, there was no need for me to put the TV on to send me off to kip. My tiredness alone will soon see me off in the land of Nod! I thought!

An hour of Thought-Storms, they were mostly of the guilt, self-hatred, and shame mode. Then I moved on to worrying about Monday’s trip out to the podiatrist at St Ann’s Health Centre. I put the TV on, for sleep was not attainable.

I was getting nowhere with my designs for sleep, and I decided to remove my magnificently honed and toned, super-fit, woman-desired, muscular body from the none-working recliner, and replenish the spring water bottle. 

I stubbed my toes en route to the kitchen! I whimpered a bit, and returned to the recliner immediately, took a pain killer, and tried to get some pain gel on the toes.

This proved to a farcical effort, I’ll tell you why; I got some gel on a paper towel, grabbed it with the picker-upperer, and tried to apply it to the two toes affected. This didn’t go well! Thanks to Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley’s most untimely attack, I gelled part of the foot, shin, carpet, hands, and the recliner, I’m not sure if any gel actually got onto the stubbed toes! Cragknackles!

I didn’t bother with getting any of the spring water! But sleep now seemed an impossibility. So I put the TV back on (desperate now!) in the hopes that the commercials would send me off.

Which they did in the end, but I had to a few more hours.

Worra life!

4 thoughts on “Inchcocksi – Saturday 25th July 2020: Chinwagless! Humph!

  1. We are all praying for good results from St. Ann’s. You have plenty of difficulties keeping pills straight, now the ointments are mixing around on you. I remember early one morning a long time ago, I was in a state of blurriness when I put tooth paste on my toothbrush. When I put said toothbrush in my mouth, I was jolted into consciousness from the horrible taste. I had put Prepation-H on my toothbrush instead of toothpaste. I started using Aquafresh toothpaste after that because it as three colors to let me know I got toothpaste on my toothbrush. Otherwise, it sounds like prepping your single horned rhino body for the day had a few successes. Great looking meal.

    • Thanks, Tim, fingers crossed, mate.
      The ‘Toothpaste Incident’, that is so amazing, Tim, absolutely! For I did the same, wit Germoloid on the brush, and changed a to the Colgate paste gel! (Multicoloured) Hahaha!
      Life can be starnger than fiction, and full of coincidences.
      TTFNski, Sir!

Leave a Reply