Inchcock Today: Issue 45⅐ Local News Snippets – With Odes

Well, for a change, it wasn’t done by a gang of louts,
Or anti-social youths on a vandalising walkabout!
But an out of work, homeless chap,
Who’s little property left, they had thrown out…
They didn’t want his crap…
Homeless life is bad enough; he freaked out,
Will the judge see this? I doubt!

Two years, he’ll be back in 12 months, oh, glee!
After doing his bullying, can’t they see…
He’ll get fed, medicated, pampered, all for free!
Will he stop hitting women? I think not he!.

Some traffic Wardens do their job efficiently…
The odd one, maybe, aggressively…
But it matters not which variety…
No excuse for acting so violently,
If they catch him, with exigency…
Will they sentence him with clemency?

The heat of the moment or an angry man?
He doesn’t look like an arithmetician,
His face shows no signs of guilt – deadpan?
Looks like your average, Nottinghamian…
He’ll eat well in prison, though not riparian,
Just another vicious ignorant proletarian!.

We really do need a better deterrent…
Three coppers to the hospital he sent…
Noses broke, bruises and in addlement…
He gets 9 months? That’s admonishment?
Suspended too! A great advertisement…
Anyone wanting to attack a copper, it’s apparent…
They now know they’ll get no chastisement!
No care for the police; it makes me incandescent,
Yobs will be laughing at getting their indictment!.

Why, oh, why, do men do this?
Are they indolent, thick or taking the piss?
Do they want to rape or kiss?
Do they think their victims reckon it’s bliss?
Something is seriously amiss…
Throw away the key, is my analysis!.

And still, the home is operating,
Social Care alarm bells should ring!
2021, Carers stole from patients’ homes… Cringing!
Over 9000 cases recorded! Astounding!
Bad Care Homes, are authorities closing?
Only one on Nottingham, blinded by camouflaging…
Or back-handers, prosecution sabotaging?
Cash for closed-eyes? I’m frothing!

Are E-scooters allowed on buses then?
A danger surely, Others legs they will threaten?
But will the riders ever listen?
I think they should be verboten!

A pleasant looking creature,
Bet she’s a blood-donator?
Don’t know her, so can’t hate her…
Mayhaps she’s a night club ejector,
Or a drug gangs problem-eradicator?
It’s all open to conjecture!

A lovely sounding character,
Lost his partner and lover…
Maybe he can’t find another
Now doubt he’s having mental bother,
He’s likely to be a reoffender…
Violence to others, is on his agender,
Without even going on a bender…
I hope he gets some help on offer!

Alcoholic and druggy, he be…
24-years old… can he break-free?
From the grip of alcohol, and settle for tea?
I did it, but I was very lucky…
It was not easy for me…
I hope Aiden can settle-down.

He keeps finding a way to cheat!

Well, something cheery at last!

This news may sound like jollification…
But it doesn’t bring me depression…
But, after so many tries, a hint of frustration…
I’ve once got two house, mostly the one…
This time, of course, it was back to none!
A gambling goes; winning I seem to shun…
Due to my view of foccinaucinihilipilification!.

Why not pop-over to see Nottingham?
Robin Hood lived here, man of fame!
Staying uninjured or alive can be a game…
Always someone to steal, mug, or maim…
People in need, need for you to tame…
Still, I mustn’t complain!


6 thoughts on “Inchcock Today: Issue 45⅐ Local News Snippets – With Odes

  1. You have some fine looking criminals in your part. Albuquerque has become one of the most dangerous cities in the USA.

  2. A fine crop of criminals to keep us being careful, Sir. I think the world is soaked sick with them, but they never go away. Putin is in a class by himself and he quite enjoys the dirty schemes he creates, then he finds ways to make those designs even more devious and more painful.
    These featured low lives come up with some really Putinesque assaults, then they try to make their crimes more grotesque, it is akin to expressing your loathsome practices in degrees of a Putin. Such as “What would Putin do, were he giving me advice on bedeviling the society today?”
    A fine morning to you, Kind cocker!

    • I fang, you, Sire Billum, my venturesome Virgolean, honourable Humira-hassled friend, and cyber-mate.
      I’ve just done the washing after delivering Josie’s lunch. Took a photo of it, but the loader isnlt letting me upload it again. Fingers crossed for later. I’ve also taken a photo earlier, of Carer Cheeky Charley, with me alongside here! Hope I can get it on the computer.
      Back to your commentingski: “Can you not throw-up? Blocked sinus’s? Take a Putin-Pucking tablet!”
      I think we may have more criminal elemented Nottinghamians, than honest ones?
      The brain-fog is clearing. The Email I sent to the Doctor, bounced-back again???
      When Carer Josie calls again, I’ll ask her if she can call the Doctors for me. The ears are crammed with wax, making things harder to hear… well it would, wouldn’t it. Haha! I keep shoving the olive oil into them, but what I can hear, sounds so different. Even Herberts noises.
      Bestest wishes for a super-Sunder, saturated with lots of luxious luck!

      • May you upload capacity rise above your expectations, Sir.
        Much of the world outside of the Trump-focussed Putin apologists is all about that fellow who rides bare chested on a poor horse who must endure or become glue. He learned much running the KGB in East Berlin and is putting it to fell use, I must say. I am pleased at the arms supplied to the populace to defend their very country. I have seen photos of Ukrainians assembling cocktails ala Molotov.What are those little white balls that look like styrofoam? Perhaps it is styrofoam?
        Brain-fog decreases are always goon in my opine. I don’t know how to handle email bouncing, unfortunately.
        The ointment I slather over my noggin sometimes gets onto my ears and hardens, it is a messy pain getting it off with fingernails and tweezers. Doesn’t affect my deafness though. By great fortune, I do not produce much earwax. Maybe you could sell your excess earwax online?
        Luxious luck to you as well, Kind Bloke!

      • This war, after all (Most of) the poiticians said ‘No more, never again’. All I can do is hope, compared to the suffering civilians… oh, dear. Palastinians now Ukrainians, if Pucking succeds, it will not stop!
        No idea what the etyronfoam is, Bill. antitank like the mudbombs?
        Earwax may have an outlet… or not. Hehehe!
        Hope yout papules recede soon Billum, I’m emailing yout boss about it… mind you, when I email my Doctor it alway bounced back.
        Oh, Ive got the air-fryer. Gawd I’ve made a mistake with it, it’s MMMassive! No room for it on the counter. Humph!
        Not up to much currently, mate. Why? I’ve no idea, might be the conflict.
        Keepeth safe. ♥

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