Inchcock Today – Monday 21st September 2020: A most kerflummoxing day!

TFZer Keith Hehehe!

Monday 21st September 2020

Spanish: Lunes 21 de Septiembre de 2020

02:35hrs: After some confusing fretting and pondering over my rare unwillingness to wake-up, my uhtceare cleared as I reached an unwilling, point of threshold consciousness, with a lack of confidence. Reticence and indisposedness towards even getting up had to be fought against. Then the quotidian need of a wee-wee made my mind up for me.

I had no choice, but to (apathetically) battle my bulbous-body out of the £300, second-hand, c1968, rickety recliner, and get to the OGPEB (Overnight-Grey-Plastic-Emergency-Bucket). At this stage, I was not fully alert or aware. By the time I’d got the long shoe horn and got the slippers on, I’d hobbled by the bucket and was in the wet room before I realised it.

A wee-wee of the RSHH (Reluctant, Sprinkling-Half-Hearted) mode was taken. As I was hutching up the PP’s, a dose of AMD (After-Micturition-Dribbling) flowed of its own accord. So, a washing up and change of PP’s was called for. I seemed to be doing everything in a foggy-haze?

But luckily, I misjudged the distance on my right-hand side again and clouted my shoulder against the door frame. This brought me into a more awareness mode, and muttering a couple of curse words under my breath!

I gathered the bucket to the kitchenette to clean. I took the medications first this morning, including an extra Codeine 60g with the morning medications, to counter SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley), who had been activated by my shoulder-charge against the wet room door. Hahaha!

I got the kettle on, and the machines out of the medical drawer, and fetched the Kodak, determined to get used to this camera’s workings, although my belief and confidence told me that I wouldn’t. (I didn’t either!) I took three shots of the morning view, all in different modes, Aperture Priority, Night Panorama and Auto. As you can see on the right here, this was not a success at all! So, back and swapped the Kodak for the Nikon.

Catastrophically, the Boot’s made in India sphygmomanometer’s SYS reading had shot back up again to 163 this time! Tsk!

The other two, DIA and the pulse seemed alright, or not so far wrong.

I was feeling a tad more chirpy and awake now. I hadn’t the foggiest idea why, mind.

The Boot’s made in China stick thermometer showed a reading of 34.3°c. Perhaps a tad low, but higher than it has been over the last week or so.

I got some baby new potatoes in the crock-pot, flavoured with just some of the gorgeously tasty Squid vinegar, got the mushrooms draining, and made myself a brew of, perhaps my third-favourite tea, Glengettie Gold. Bootiful!

I was summoned back to the Porcelain Throne, all the signs and messages told me it was going to be a big one, although the lower tummy-pangs felt different! I was not overly concerned when nothing moved. After all, these motions have been controlled by the innards for weeks now. I got out the crossword book and spent a while getting few answers in, in fact, I was doing so well, it was a long time, maybe twenty minutes, before I realised that no movements had flowed, got stuck, and started again, as they usually do?  Then, wind like never before shot out, but no matter. I still gave it a few more minutes, but nothing happened. out. Yet, I felt like I had passed?

I washed and went to update the hospital’s evacuation log. And onto the computer to get yesterday’s dairy updated and done.

It took me 1½ hours to get the post finished. The problems with CorelDraw were still with me, and the paltry couple of photographs I needed cost me so much time! I fear the worst! But I managed to get it completed and posted it off to WordPress. Sent the Email link off, and went on the WordPress Reader section. Did some Facebooking catch-up, next.

Aha, another call to the Throne! Off to the wet room. A mighty movement indeed! Did its usual stopping partway, and when it moved again, it shot out. So painful, and so long! A little bleeding. The product was nobbly with tiny white bits in it? Ah-well! I decided to get the ablutions done while I was in there.

All went wellish. No teeth troubles, only one shaving cut. A few dropsies, as is to be expected. The medicating wasn’t so easy. I caught Fred Furuncle, and a bit of bleeding from Haemorrhoid Harold, and amongst the dropsies was the olive oil dropper again.

The plastic lid broke, and I had a slippery ground floor level mess to clean-up. I believe I may have muttered something like, ‘Well, well, still, it can’t be helped! Ahem!

The Morrison delivery arrived. The chap put the carrier bags in the hallway for me, I handed him a G&T by way of thanks, and off he trotted.

I got the bags through to the kitchenette read for unloading and had to shoot back to the wet room again.

I felt the dire need for the Porcelain Throne to be utilised again. I haven’t needed more than one for in a day for months, never mind I thought, and wobbled off and got myself seated on the raised metal and disabled assist plastic seat, and again I waited.

And I waited.

And I kept on waiting.

Then waited some more.

Eventually, the feeling, come sensation that I needed to go, gradually disappeared? Not even any wind this time? What’s going on? Tsk!

I opened the first few carriers onto the server trolley. A grand selection of fodder laid there for my delectation. Baby new potatoes, Surami sticks, and Cox’s apples. A red onion, tomatoes, Two bottles of Squid vinegar/sauce. Oh, and a Breath-Easy spray (I shan’t be eating that one. Haha), and black grapes.

Got them away, and opened some more carriers. Another server of extravagant delicacies for my palate. Fresh unhomogenised full milk (You can’t beat it with Thompsons Punjana, Glengettie, Strong Assam, or Gengettie Gold tea!), Marmite cheese discs, Milk Roll bread, sliced white rolls, lemon mousse, Irish Potatoe Farls, G&Ts, and iced suckers.

I got the good in the fridge and freezer, and tinned peas in the cupboard. It all went smoothly, no dropsies, knock anything other or walking into owt! Even the right ankle and foot was looking better! Smug-Mode-Assumed! 

I made a brew of Thompsons Punjana, using the new unhomogenised whole milk, of course (Yummy!) And while the tea mashed, I took this photograph, a close-up, of the houses opposite the flats. They look pretty from up here, don’t you think?

Then… it happened again!

I gave it while, in the hopes that it might come back on its own, and went out on the balcony, and took another zoomed-in shot, of the circus tent over in Woodthorpe Grange Park. I’ll put this in the Winwood Heights Facebook page later.

Jenny called me on the landline, bless her cotton socks. She had some more yellow tomatoes for me and some home-grown onions. She even delivered them to outside the door for me. Thanks, Jenny, you’re an Angel! ♥ I’m looking forward the using some of these on the meal tonight!

I got back to the computer, and it was operating again, Phew! Then I had a look at the Your Nottingham email; newsletter. A bit about the danged Coronavirus caught my eye.

Coronavirus Latest via the Emailed Your Nottingham Site:

There have been more Coronavirus cases over the past 24 hours with 40 new confirmed positive results across Nottinghamshire, according to the latest Government data. A total of 17 new cases were reported in Nottingham city, bringing the total to 1,625. In wider Nottinghamshire, cases increased by 23, bringing the total to 3,921.

I’m having difficulty in understanding all this palava. To me, this is serious, but people on the news, and some here in the flats, say it’s all a con? Surely nearly 100 new cases can’t be a con? Or can it?

Oh, Slobbersodditness! Liberty-Global Virgin Internet is down again, now! Humph!

I’ll get the waste bags sorted and taken away, then see what’s what with the internet and get some nosh made methinks.

Somehow or other, I got the pile of done-up waste and recycling bags on the three-wheeler guide trolley. En route to the chute room, I’d spent more time picking up bags that dropped off of the wheels, than actually walking there. Hehehe!

I deposited the small bags down the shaft, and accident-free as well!

I went to the elevator lobby with the recycling bags, and waited, and waited some more. Eventually, the cage arrived, and Eric from the top floor was in it.

As I entered with his permission, SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley) gave me a bashing, very embarrassing when I’m with someone. Tsk! But Eric didn’t mention anything, bless him. When we got down, he shot off, can’t blame him. Haha!

I got out to the bins, left the bag, returned inside the main lobby, all without seeing a single soul.

In the lift lobby, two chaps spoke to me, but I couldn’t tell what they were saying, with having to wear the fave-mask, I couldn’t put the hearing aids in. Glumbleclops!

I got back to the flat and did some meal prepping. Some of the Morrisons mini toms and Jenny’s yellow ones were sliced, and sea salted. One of the onions was trimmed and cut, I had a nibble while doing this, by gum, they had an excellent tasty tang to them!

I got it at all served up, on the tray, and settled to feast away, Hey-hey!

The white bread rolls tasted like cardboard. But everything else went down a treat, a decent taste-rating of 7/10 given.

Washed the pots and got down in the recliner. Put a Dr Who DVD on, but soon fell into the much-needed land-of-nod, which was beautiful! The landline burst forth and flashed. Out of the recliner, and struggled to the phone. It as Caroline from the Falls Team, to inform me that the walking frame will be collected on Friday25th September. She apologised for waking me, but it can’t be helped, bless her. ♥

Scribbled the date on the pad, and got down in the recliner. Thankfully, it didn’t take me too long to get back to Sweet Morpheous.

But… it didn’t last long, the door chimes rang out their Dusty Spring field’s tune, “I only want to be with you!”.

As I fought me way out of the chair, they rang again. Getting my balance and some clothes on, once again the bells chirped their tune, on my way to the door, they rang for the fourth time… is this an emergency I thought?  It was Josie, waking me up again, for the sixth week on the trot! To return Sundays plate and tray. Oh, dear!

I expected it really, she just can’t seem to remember about my getting my head down early. Hehe! She gave me a packet of Cheese Twists.

Sadly, with so many sleep interruptions, this time it was hard work getting back to kip again.  Groggleknockers!

Inchcock Today – Sunday 20th December 2020: A malagrugrous day! I’m glad it’s gone away, I say!

TFZer Pattie

Sunday 20th December 2020

Welsh: Dydd Sul 20fed Rhagfyr 2020

00:30hrs: I woke up, wanting a wee-wee, as has been the case for the last four or five mornings. But no sleep interrupting needs, which I’m thankful for.

I felt in much better health and perkier than last night now, and the removal of my obstinately, ever-growing more gigantic, flabbergastingly-flabby, flagitiously and over-fat bellied torso from the recliner, seemed so much easier for me, this morning.

Unfortunately, it was another one of the vicious HLSBS (Hosepipe-Like-Short-Blasting-Splashback) types, that required a good deal of cleaning up, a wash and change of PP’s. The urinary incontinence MAD (Micturition After-Dribble) followed. And off to the kitchenette, I wobbled.

I got the kettle filled and turned on and attempted to get a decent photograph of the morning view. I used the Nikon camera and put it in Night-Landscape mode. Held the camera against the thick window frame, and tried to hold it with the left hand and use the right one to press the shoot button. No good!

The BP Sys sphygmomanometerisationing showed that it had tumbled down to only 135! I can’t work out why it keeps going up and up, then drops back up again? The cause may be, I suppose, the mysterious wonders of Woodthorpe Court: The Woodthorpe Court ghosts, hobgoblins, boll-weevils, aliens, gremlins, grotesqueries, urchins, karakia-cursing entities, hallucinations. Materialisations, poltergeist, lemures, wairuas, kehuas, manifestations that permeate, pass through the pores and interstices of space, through the time-continuum. Usually, without rupture or displacement within the building. To cause havoc, fear and frustration, as they dislodge time itself, in their aspirations and skulduggery, to complete their given-by-Satan mission; ‘To destroy the sanity, confuse, and scare the hell out of Inchcock!’ Hahaha!

The stick-thermometer gave a reading of 34.8°c, which is okay for me. As I was putting the things back in the drawer, the ‘Hum’ outside turned louder, and positively to a droning like noise?

I got some potatoes in the crock-pot, and added water and Squid vinegar, and made a brew of Glengettie tea.

Then I had to have another wee-wee. This was of the SWCHH (Sprinkly-Weak-Half-Hearted) style.

I remembered then, the two wee-wees needed recording on the NHS record log. 

The throat seemed extremely dry, I was coughing a little, and carminative blasts of wind were escaping from the rear end. Some of them were blasters and relongated rumblers. Mmm?

Got several small black waste bags made up, disinfected and sealed, ready to take to the chute, in a few hours, when it would not disturb my fellow tenants.

I made a start on updating the Saturday blog. Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters and SSS Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley) were not too bothersome at all.

Which is just as well, because Anne Gyna and Arthur Itis were already giving me more than enough discomfort. I took a few swigs of the ineffectual, wishy-washy, impotent Peptac antacid medicine, I’m sure it helped any, and an extra Codeine 60g to counter Arthur Itis’s knee and ankle pain.

During the hours of doing the update, I had two more wee-wee’s, both of the SWCHH (Sprinkly-Weak-Half-Hearted) mode. Then, I sent Email link, read and answered comments, visited the WordPress Reader section, and did some Facebooking catching-up.

Then another wee-wee! This one was a PSL (Powerful-Short-Lived) release. Now the innards are giving me some right jip! I’ve had some bother this week ain’t I?

Got a template made-up. Then moved onto CorelDraw to create some diary-top graphics, I’m right out of them now.

The innards are still churning a mite. SSS has calmed down. But now it’s the new spectacles that are bothering me, they keep slipping off of my nose! Tsk! 

The ablutions next, and a damned fine job of doing them too! Naturally, there were a few dropsies here and there, but no toe stubbings, no knocks or walking into anything, no dizzies, and the showerhead stayed where it was, or I meant it to go!

The various departments medicationalisationing was a bit painful, but it was expected to be. Getting the fresh PP’s on afterwards, and did manage to swipe some items off of the floor cabinet. Oh, and I needed two of the reluctant wee-wees while in the wet room – that was convenient! Haha! I’d better top up the bowel ad bladder visits-list for the hospital.

The right foot’s new marks are not spreading or gaining any new bits, fading, and the ankle ulcer is all but gone now!

I reckon all these ailments, add to the colourfulness of my life, you know. My prepubescent, childish giving them names, such as Duodenal Donald, Stuttering Stephany, Reflux Roger, Arthur Itis, Hernia Harry, Haemorrhoid Harold, Back-Pain-Brenda, Saccades-Sandra, Bladder-Cancer-Bob, Kidney Kevin, Peripheral-Neuropathic-Pete, Little-Inchies Fungal Lesion, PMAD (Post-Micturition After-Dribble and the PMD (Pre-Micturition-Dribble), Metal Mickey (Mechanical-Aorta-Valve-Tim), Thrombophlebitis-Thomas, Varicose-Veins-Victor, Dizzy Dennis, Axonotmesis Arnold, Lethologica-Linda, Myasthenia Gravis Mavis, Vasculitis Vanessa, Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters, Shaking-Shaun, and of course, Ankle-Ulcer-Andrew, Bladder-Cancer-Cyril, Chlorhexidine Christine, Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley, Clopidogrel-Clive, Thrombophlebitis, Neuropathic Schuhplattler dancing, Axonotmesis, myasthenia gravis, PIP (Proximal Interphalangeal Pain), Stubbed-Toe Stewart, LIFL (Little-Inches-Fungal-Lesion Ian’s-Idiopathic-Polyneuropathy, and Peripheral-Neuropathy-Nigel, Hyperglycaemia-Hyman, Diabetes-Mellitus-Miranda, Diabetic-Dianne, Fulton’s Furunculosis, Phimosis-Plato, Paraphimosis-Patrick, Thrombophlebitis-Fred, Psoriatic Arthritis Paul, Colin-Cramps, Varicose-Veins-Victor, etc., all help to keep me amused. But I’m blown if I can think up a name for new scabs on top of the right foot, might be best to wait until I get the results back from the biopsy next week. And I’ve got the bowel and bladder scans the next day. Then the cardiac reassessment. Oh, and the dentists soon. Still, it keeps me interested and busy. Hehehe!

Hello, I’ve got a nose-bleed now? I’ll go and have a decker, back in a bit…

I got to the wet room, ran the cold water tap, and had a look in the mirror, to see up the nose. (See that, I’ve no fear at all, looking at my face in a magnifying shaving mirror. Hahaha!) Feel a fool now, no idea what caused it, a deep red colour it was too – but after poking some paper towels up and cleaning the right cavity out, it’s not leaking at all now? I suppose it’s all part of the mysterious wonders of Woodthorpe Court? Had another wee-wee while I was in there, a bit stronger this time, of the SPUTE variety. (Sharp-Persistent-Unwilling-To-End). Rarely do I pass two of a kind after each other. Got the hands well scrubbed up and sanitised.

I got Josie’s lunch prepared and delivered it to her, dead on midday as usual. Ooh, I am good! Hahaha!

I hung out of the balcony window to the right, to take this snap of the kid’s playground in Woodthorpe Grange Park. Not many Nottinghamians about for a Sunday.

Back to the CorelDrawing.But a massive weariness came on me, and I was no use for doing anything that needed concentration.

So, off went the computer, and I poddled about getting my meal sorted and served. There didn’t seem anything wrong with it, I’m sure I should have enjoyed it more. I think the taste-buds have gone on strike, Hehe! Taste-Rating: 5/10.

Washed the pots, then myself, took the medications and got down in search of sleep. But it wasn’t about to come soon. The Thought-Storms were persistent.

Hey-ho! TTFNski each.

Inchcockski – Saturday 19th September 2020: Frustrations, irascibilities and Murphy’s law ruled today!

Saturday 19th September 2020

Italiano: Sabato 19 Settembre 2020

03:30hrs: Woke wanting a wee-wee, worked my way out of the wreck of a recliner, and wobbled, without delay, to the awaiting wee-wee bucket. For a WUPT (Weak-Unwilling-Painless-Trickling) mode release. Went wearily to wash my hands, checked-out the PPs, no leakages at all last night. And with a semi-imitation, pretend Smug-Mode coming on, I wobbled along to the kitchen, to get the morning’s essentials sorted out, medications, Health Checks etc. and the most important, make a brew of tea. Haha! 

The dang chemist’s tablet packaging was still full of static; tablets had transferred from one pod to others, the pills were sticking to all sides as well (Static?). You should try opening these without some tablet or capsule shooting off somewhere, never to be seen again! No wonder I get confused and take the wrong ones. My thanks to Carrington Pharmacy, 343-345 Mansfield Road, Carrington, Nottingham NG5 2DA, Telephone number: 0115 960 5453, just up from the Lidl store, for the skilful way that they keep my interest and grumpiness alive, and give me something to moan about every month with their late, or incorrect disarrayed, can’t get at, misleading, crappily-packed confusing, mixed-up prescriptions pods. Bless ’em!

Gripe-over!

Sadly, the BP sphygmomanometer machine’s readings for the SYS had shot up again, to 167 now! I keep mentioning this high SYS and showing the photos to the various nurses who call on me, but luckily, it doesn’t seem to bother them much.

On the brighter side, the stick thermometer gave me a decent reading of the body temperature, 35°c, which is something at least that seems to be within the required limits. Hehe! Made a brew of Glengettie Gold, and the need of another wee-wee arose.

I filled in the records sheet for the last one and this on the chart for the hospital, and trotted off to the wet room.

Once in there, after the wee-weeing was done, as so often happens, the Porcelain Throne use was called for.

A real hard to get going job again. The usual nudge of activity, then solid as a rock, so I got the crossword book out and sat in pain as things started to move so slowly, yet ended up with a rush? A right dollop of it, but of a distinctly different construction. I shan’t go into it. The tank had to be filled by hand twice, it needed to flushes before things disappeared down the hole. Tsk! I washed, and filled in the logs.

I got on the computer, and had to make a template first, then got on with updating yesterday’s blog, which went extremely well. There was a lot needed doing, but the ailments were all sparing in their intrusions.

Then I wanted to do some more Lies, Astonishing, Whoopsiedangleplops and Accifauxpas graphics. So got on CorelDraw… and what a farcicalness followed! I was uploading the finished graphics to WordPress, and somehow, Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters failed at just the wrong time, as I selected the options, of course, I didn’t sense it, and I sent the whole folder to WordPress.

Of course, my accidentally trying to load 800 odd pictures at the same time was not my plan, and the programme froze with all sorts of messages coming up from the computer!

Fear was the main feeling at the time. I could not close the programme, the computer would not let me onto the web. I was stuck! After trying to keep calm and work out what could be done for ages, I gave up, and had to turn off the machine! Gawd, this scared me, I was sure that things would not work out right, and half expected the computer and or WordPress, to be knackered!

I didn’t, but I did feel like crying. I left the computer to cool down and let anything Norton might be doing in the background to finish, and had to pop back to the wetroom again for a wee-wee, worry, and stewing in self-pity session.

The wee-wee was one of the messy, VSWAO (Viciously-Spraying-Wildy-All-Over) type. The cleaning up took me ages again. Some PMD (Pre-Micturition-Dribbling) this time, meant fresh PP’s were needed also… and guess what happened as I tried to get the new ones on?

I lost my balance and tumbled over, hitting the already bruised stomach against the corner of the floor cabinet. Knocking things off of it! I did my best to keep my temper, as calmly as possible, IO picked up the knocked-over items, and got back to getting the PP’s on.

This time the 5&@^ing Peripheral Neuropathy Pete, launched one of his involuntary right-leg Neuropathic Schuhplattler dances, and over I went in the other direction. Clouting the top of my right leg, on the feared sock-glide, and spot-on where the small furuncle was!

All this time, I was thinking about the computer problems, and my spirits sank, bile came from the stomach, and interest in everything just faded. So, I wasn’t precisely concentrating as I went to get through the doorway.

Yes, I stubbed my toe on the 3inch gap at the bottom of the door! Suicideworthiness! Claptickleisations! Gragnankles! and Cribblebogangonies! I’ve not felt as depressed, frustrated and worthless for years! But I still needed to know what the damage was with the computer, expecting the worst, I returned to have decker and turned back on my beloved Bang Olufsen.

Everything was working again. How? Why? I wasn’t really too interested in – just over-the-moon! A message from Norton came up, I didn’t understand it all, but it seems they had saved the day for me.

Of course, I wasn’t distraught. Ahem!

A new zest developed, I started singing Adam Faith, and Billy Fury songs as I at long last started doing this blog! Even the wee-weeing so often didn’t bother me, Yee-Ha! I did so far, then went on Facebooking catch-up, WordPress.

The day was well progressed now, after all the fussing about. I lost hours!

I made the nosh. Decent enough, a flavour rating of 6.5/10.

Nipped off for a wee-wee, which was of the CMA (Cloudy-Mini-Amount), added the leaf to the NHS log.

I washed-up the pots, took the medications, and then suffered the zemblanity of a sudden weariness like never before. I got settled down without a wash or any clothes on (sorry about that, it must have brought a horrendous image to your mind, perhaps of dying rhinoceros? Hahaha!) And just lay there, the mind storms having a free hand for hours, confusion when they stopped, mentally and physically drained, and eventually dropped of into a much-needed kip.

I woke up around midnight, feeling much better and perkier, in need of a wee-wee, of course.

A simple bus ride to fetch my Spectacles – Not on your life, talk about things going wrong. Humph!

A simple bus ride to fetch my Spectacles

Not on your life, talk about things going wrong!

The things you will read on this so-called true-funny blog of mine,

Really are true, and challenge my sanity  and mind,

Please persist reading, and you will find,

Why I have logicality, hopelessness and despondencies entwined!

Off to Sherwood to collect my glasses,

I’ll call on Jenny and Doris, such lovely lasses,

I’ll leave them a treat, containing molasses,

Might get a chinwag with whoever passes?

 ———————————————

Caught the lift down with no problem at all,

Left the bag, hope they have a ball,

Returned to lift lobby hall,

Catching the elevator, not easy at all,

I was so frustrated and appalled,

25 minutes later, the lift responded to my call!

 ———————————————

Rushing out to Chestnut Walk, slipped and broke my shoe,

Clouted it on the walker’s wheel, surely there is some good luck due?

But what made me saddest, was the bus had departed, early too!

So, all het-up now, I legged-it, passed-wind, and feared wanting a poo!

 ———————————————

On Winchester Street, The walker ran away from me,

I chased it, and is facticity,

I wedged it against a box for electricity,

To take this phot, but not with enough adequacy,

I stopped it again but with inefficacity,

No doubt about it, this was going to be a trip of paucity!

———————————————

I got down the hill, energy’s what I did lack,

I must get the bus up the hill going back,

I called on two shops to get cleaner and a snack,

Off to the optician’s, the one drawback,

I was wearing a sort of anorak,

I was so hot, but didn’t hold back,

Got in the shop, and took the receptionist flak,

I was late, it seems was her crack!

———————————————

I had a long wait to be seen,

Not that I was all that keen,

£300 to pay, never again to be seen,

Crosswording while I waited,

The receptionist called me to be seen,

The lady dealt with me, glasses were fitted,

I got quite jolly-fully contented and witted,

Until it came time to pay, the nI was fritted!

I’d forgotten my pin number again,

I think the lady thought of me; “What a Pain!”

From crying out loud, I did refrain,

She got the money through, this seemed diaphane,

How I don’t know, so I asked her, it felt germane,

I didn’t understand her, and felt a right dumb-brain,

Thanked her, pretending to understand, I did mislain,

Still, she didn’t moan or complain!

Then out and up the hill, to catch the bus again!

———————————————

I had to doge another Pavement Cyclist, he gave me a fright, 

I was too tired to comment or get into a fight,

I’d run out of the Kryptonite! 

Would I make the walk home up the fearsome hill? I might! 

Down to the traffic light corner,

And the bus passed by, I was too late!

I checked the next ones time and date, 

40 minutes, too long to stand and wait,

So I set off, limping, with an unsteady gait!

The hill looked a fearsome sight, 

The prospect of climbing it, made me feel uptight,

Sorry that I didn’t wait for the bus, I felt contrite!

Anyone seeing me struggle up the road must have seen a sickening sight,

I was sure the gradient was gaining height?

The hobble home seemed infinite

At the top of Winchester, the parkers made things tight,

For breakfast, I should have had some Marmite,

The time went by slowly, and things went quite,

Somehow, up the last part of the hill, I did expedite, 

To see a harrowing sight,

The 40 bus arriving, some tenants did alight,

 My energy was drained completely now, flat!

Didn’t have the energy for eating my cervelat,

Must not fall asleep, I’ll have to do summat,

I got back to the apartment, Zzzz; that was that!


After this abysmal, Whoopsiedangle-ridden trip, the poor old twit, did have fleeting thoughts of a suicidal nature. but he did not act on them – He fell asleep! Haha!

Inchcock – Wed 16 Sept: My busiest, but happiest day for months! Two nurses visits! Chinwags! I was in heaven!

TFZ in the hallway in his mansion!

Wednesday 16th September 2020

Somali: Arbaco 16ka Sebtember 2020

02:35hrs: I came back to a sort of ersatz life, and was in need of a wee-wee. No surprise there, then. I rose gently from my £300, second-hand, c1968, dilapidated, not-working, cringeworthily beige-coloured, rusty, rickety, recliner, and did so with relative ease. Got the stick and caught my balance, and woggled-wobbly to the EOGPB (Essential-Overnight-Grey-Plastic-Bucket) and took a rather unexpected LHLB (Long-Hosepipe-Like-Blasting) wee-wee! There was no AMD (After-Micturition-Dribbling), either? I took the bucket and emptied, washed and disinfected it.

I got feeling instantly guilty, as, on my the way to the kitchen, I espied positive signs of my nocturnal-nibbling activities! And not just a few Quaver packets, but three, an empty yoghourt pot, and a stick from an iced-sucker as well! (Guilt-Ridden-Mood adopted).

To the kitchenette, and got the kettle on the boil, and took a photo of the morning view, with the Nikon, in aperture-priority mode. Not one of my bestest, but still. I heard creaking noises, but could not find where they were coming from. They sounded as if they were all around the flat? And the mysterious ‘Hum’ was getting louder again?

So, I had a look outside to see if I could hear any in the flat’s hallway, but no! The newly screeded concrete flooring had feet marks on it already. They were Josies from when she woke me up last night, methinks. They were small and opposite my front door. Not that it should matter, cause the ground is going have the imitation wood flooring tiles fitted on it soon. But no creaking sounds out there, when I returned to the flat, I heard the scrunching sounds again, but they got less often as time passed. I hope the building isn’t crumbling! Ooh-er!

I got the BP sphygmomanometer readings done. And, Oh, dearie me! The Sys had shot up to 178 now! Dia 76, Pulse 79. The last two seemed alright to me, but then again, I do get confused much more with my newly acquired Arithmaphobia nowadays.

The stick thermometer read another healthy-looking 35°c. The second day in a row that it has reached 35°, so things seem to be looking up in that department, anyway. So, apart from the silly-high Sys, things appear okay.

Perhaps the worrying about all the busy medical and other appointments coming today, might have some bearing on the Sys? Or, not!

I got the mug of Glengettie Gold tea and went to the computer. Where I took a Nikon shot of the right foot, showing me that the new, either ulcer or Clopidogrel allergy rashes on top of the limb, is growing in contrast, and spreading-out a little further? The old ankle ulcer is getting jealous methinks and is getting a smidge more flared again. Hehe!

As usual, when I started typing to update the Tuesday blog, SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley) kicked off. How does the Peripheral-Neuropathy know when to get Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters and SSS, or even launched one of his involuntary right-leg Neuropathic Schuhplattler dances, and act-up at the least opportune times for me? Humph!

I went on Google and found a site called Health-Unlocked, about Peripheral Neuropathy, I joined, and hope to live long enough to find the time to take part in the discussions.

I pressed on and got the post finished, but it was annoying and frustrating work. Took me far too long, but still, Hey-Ho and there you go! I emailed the link, answered comments, Pinterested some snaps, and then went on Facebook catch-up.

: The ablutions were carried out. A total of only eight dropsies. No toe stubbings, no clearing any shelves or falls! One two mini-shaving cuts. Perhaps an even better session than yesterday! SSSSME Smug-Swank-Superior-Smiling-Mode-Engaged!

I moved the maroon jacket I’d washed, rung and hung last night, above the kitchen sink, into the wet room to dry a little quicker, and out the wall convector heater on to encourage it.

Made a start on this template, and the landline burst into life. It was the optician receptionist, telling me the new spectacles are ready for collection, at the shop on Mansfield Road, in Sherwood. I explained that today is too busy for me to get out, and tomorrow I have to wait until the Nottingham City Homes maintenance crew come to repair the fire alarm. She seemed pleasant enough, she is about 20-years-old, beautiful, and of course, head over heels in love with me and craves my attention’s and body. Ahem!

I decided to get the carpet up and take it to the bin outside, I’m sick of tripping-up on it. But what exertion and a struggle it was to get it up. I lost my balance rolling the carpet up, but kept from going over – and stupidly went into a Smug-Mode. Manipulating the rug and putting gorilla tape around it to stop it falling open on the journey down to the bin, and talk about timing again; Peripheral Neuropathy Pete, launched one of his involuntary right-leg Neuropathic Schuhplattler dances, and over I went, falling on the recliner chairs arm. A bit of a bruise, on my massively over-sized, blubbery-stomached torso, now. Humph!

I got the rolled mat near the front door and made up some black waste bags and a recycling sack ready to go down. I couldn’t go yet, in case the sweet, highly desirable, pretty, beautiful, attractive, loin-testing nurse Hristina should arrive while I was outside. 

Minutes later, the intercom buzzed and flashed. It was the Vampire nurse. I admitted her, I don’t how she got up to the flat so quickly, she let herself in and raced to wash her hands, then took the blood in record time! The sweet thing was very busy, as she took the blood, she told she had eighteen calls to make, and she’s spent ages trying to find somewhere to park on-site. Bless her! I slipped her a mini-bottle of champagne before she left, and she scurried out to get to her car, worried she might get a ticket. ♥ Which left me feeling down a bit, and so sad for the gal.

Then, I got the bags on the trolley, and ~I’m not sure even now how I did it, but I got to the waste chute room and deposited the small bags, caught the lift down tot he ground floor, and got out to the bin – all while dragging the large carpet along with me! And what’s more, without any Accifauxpas or Whoopsiednagleplops! A definite Smug-Mode adopted, accompanied by a sly-smirk!

Back in the foyer and back up to the flat. Made a brew of Thompsons Punjana tea, and back on the computer to carry on with the updating of this post.

I noticed later, that the view outside, looked rather like a Legoland erection. That’s not the right word, is it? Tsk! So I took a photo, and I still think it looks like a toy-town view. The colours being similar and the odd murky lightness perhaps?

I made a mug of Glengettie tea to replace the Punjana one that’d gone cold, and I returned to the computer. The right foot was itching a bit, so I had a peep at it. The new marks had now grown less intense than earlier? It’s all a mystery to me!

Sister Jane rang, we had a decent chinwag for once. Good timing, Jane! Brother-in-law Pete has many hospital appointments made, and more in the pipeline! But I’m glad he’s being cared for and they are moving fast.

While we were nattering, I heard a thud and wondered what it was. Said my farewells to Jane and Pete, and went on the hunt to see what had caused the noise, accompanied by some tap-tap knocking from Herbert, but it didn’t last long.

The questionnaire from  CityCare Continence Service. They confirmed the appointment is for 10:@15hrs, at the St Anns Valley Centre. 

A lot of instructions and advice, plus the actual questions to be answered. Nine A4 pages! So I settled to try and get them filled in.

Blimey, that took me over an hour! But it turned out good timing, the Intercom lit up and the tune played. It was Caroline from the Falls Team keeping her appointment with me.

She let herself in and set to sorting me out. She set the new walking frame up a little higher, then and watched me using it. It was not a pretty sight. A few stumbles and much kerfuffling later, we decided I’d try out the wheeled server instead. She opted to send the walker back, and suggester I use the server more.

Which made sense to me, as the wheeled-server, would be easier to use and more effective when I get Shaking Shaun, Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley, or Peripheral-Neuropathy-Pete, launching one of his involuntary right-leg Neuropathic Schuhplattler dances! I appreciated the kind help. It was so nice to have someone to have a little chinwag with, as well.  We made the decision to return the frame, and I must try to use the server more, it is safer.

Back on CorelDraw while I await the Sainsbury order coming. I made a graph from the local Coronavirus report.

Sainsbury order arrived. A mixture of delightful, (Lemon Sole for Jenny), naughty (Limoncello for Josie), and my fishy favourites, and some Farmhouse Sourdough bread (a wickedly tasty-treat for myself!) Potatoes, farls, Surimi, fish sticks etc., Great!

I got the fodder inside and stored away, getting my nosh for the night prepared. A good selection of delights: Buttered Sourdough bread, Irish potato farls, smoked streaky bacon, Jenny-supplied yellow and mini-red tomatoes, egg mayonnaise, pickled extra-strong pickled onions, and some fiendishly sweet after-nibbles of, mousse and black grapes.

After the busy day, and the excitement of seeing two hard-working, sweetly-pleasant, caring nurses attending to treat and help me, chinwagging’s, and my mood on a high, I enjoyed this feast so much. Taste-Rating; 8/10! Having the sourdough bread, was a wonderful, but naughty self-treat. That’s it now, once these bread has been finished, until next month. With the thought of eating some more, mingled with the sadness of having to go back to the usual loneliness and chatter-less days coming up.

Still, I’ve got things to look forward to, like:

  • Getting to the opticians to give them £300 and collect my spectacles.
  • The Dentist visit for three fillings and an extraction!
  • The St Anns Continence Service clinic for my bowel and bladder scans.
  • The Warfarin Anticoagulation and Deep Vein Thrombosis Clinic visit, to have my DVT reassessed.
  • Cardiac Team at the City Hospital, to have my mechanical aortic and mitral valve replacements, sounded.
  • And, to find someone who will cut my toenails! Hehehe!

I took the meal things to be washed, and moved the box I’d carried the food into the kitchen with, and came across some ‘Lego-Cards?

What are these all about?

Took the medications, and settled into the £300, second-hand, c1968 recliner. The thrills of the day must have worn me out, cause I’d nodded off very quickly, and stayed that way, for Six-Hours! Yee-ha!

Inchcock – Tuesday 15th September 2020: A day of confusions, inopinables and frustrations!

TFZers Retreat

Tuesday 15th September 2020

Greek: Τρίτη 15 Σεπτεμβρίου 2020

02:30hrs: A befuddled brain greeted me as I stirred into ersatz life. Through the mind’s fog of haziness, came the reminder that today is a stay-in-the flat one. (The 12th-floor’s lift and flat lobbies are being screeded today, so we had been given the choice, from Nottingham City Homes to either sod-off-out, and don’t come back until the job is done and dried enough, or to stay in the apartment until we are told we can leave) I opted for staying in, let’s face it, it’s not much of a change for me, from what it’s been like for the last six months or so. Hehe! I hope there are no fire-alarm activations.

The demand for a wee-wee arose, and I could feel the bladder’s intentions of leaking some PMD (Pre-Micturition-Dribbling). So, I grappled to get my wobbly, overlarge, adipose, avoirdupoisly flabby and flobby stomached-body free of the recliner, and to the OGPEB (Overnight-Grey-Plastic-Emergency-Bucket) in time. I made it, but only just! Phew! The mode of wee-wee was a change from recent visits to the bucket have been. A rare VSWAO (Viciously-Spraying-Wildy-All-Over) type!

The effects of the splashbacks meant a good cleaning up and disinfecting of certain areas as required.

Off to the wet room to take a photograph of the morning view, and for the clean-up, then to the kitchenette, to get the Health Checks done, and morning tablets took. I used the Aperture-Priority setting for the picture taken from the kitchen window.

I found pleasingly, that the SYS sphygmomanometer reading was down at last, to 148. Much betterer than of late! I got the kettle filled and plugged in, got a tasty Thomsons Punjana teabag in the mug. 

Then I searched around for the stick thermometer, it had fallen behind some boxes of tablets in the drawer, the little monkey! Hehehe! Amazing, another good result. The temperature had gone up to its highest level for months? Right up[ to 35.7°c (78.25°f), much nearer the required level.

I had a close look at the feet. The new growth on the top of the right foot was no worse. The ankle ulcer scar was much more lacklustre and fainter. I did see some new papule spots appearing on both patches (ankle and top of the right foot), but they don’t last long as a rule.

I made the brew, took the medications and off to the computer. I had received an email from Lisa, in Ohio. She’d sent some photographs of the cats, past and present. I’ll ask he is she minds if I put them on a blog. Then got down to the long, drawn-out, Nicodemus’s neurotransmitters failing and making things difficult with typing, hard work, updating yesterday’s diary. Took me far too long!

But, hopefully, I should not get interrupted with any deliveries or callers today, with the 12th-floor being cut-off from visitors for a few hours. Hope I can catch-up later.

Went on the WordPress reader section. Sent the link off. Updated the photo albums on Facebook.

On CorelDraw to get some page-top graphics done. I must get some in advance! Course Wednesday is going to be a busy-busy day, for Inchcock. Fire Alarm repair by Nottingham City Homes. Warfarin Nurse to take the blood sample, and I must remember to take the Warfarin tablets at the right time; if I remember. Also, l must call the opticians to see when the goggles will be available for fitting and collection. Caroline, the falls-team nurse is calling to test and sort out the new walker-frame. And the Sainsbury order is arriving late again this week. So sleep is bound to be another struggle! persuading Sweet Morpheous to join me will not be easy. Humph!

I’m having difficulties at the moment, with the hearing too, for no known reason that I can find. Hearing this morning is far worse than usual, and I keep shivering, and it’s not cold at all in here?

It would be nice if something happened that just might make me feel a smidge ecstasiate! Ah, well! Onwards!

Oh, heckithump! I’ve not done the ablutions yet! Change of plans, off to the wet room, then!

As I got in through the wetroom door, without any hitting or walking into anything, I might add, and with a contented smirk on my treble-chinned face, the need for the Porcelain Throne arrived.

This visit to the Throne was a little different. I fully expected a rock hard-struggle and got the crossword book out ready. But no! Things went so quickly, painfully still, mind, not messy, not stinky, but the released product was massive!

It seems the mysterious wonders of Woodthorpe Court: The ghosts, hobgoblins, boll-weevils, aliens, gremlins, grotesqueries, urchins, karakia-cursing entities, hallucinations. materialisations, poltergeist, lemures, wairuas, kehuas, manifestations that permeate, pass through the pores and interstices of space, through the time-continuum. Usually, without rupture or displacement within the building. To cause havoc, fear and frustration, as they dislodge time itself, in their aspirations and skulduggery, to complete their given by Satan mission; ‘To destroy the sanity, confuse, and scare the hell out of Inchcock’ Grobleknackerbangles!

Then, of course, the cistern did not cope with getting rid of the waste product at all. I spent ages, refilling the tank by hand, and reflushing, oddly the toilet paper as well as the poo-poo would not clear. Even after four tries. I’ll give it a go again after the ablutions are done. It’s all go, being aged and living here!

: The teeth-cleaning was not painful, no cut gums, and only one dropsy!

: The shaving was only bit more bother, though; two cuts, three dropsies, and I cracked my right elbow against the damned sock-glide retrieving the foam spray can!

: Showering went tremendously well. No dizzies, no clouting any body parts, or toe-stubbing against anything either! A few dropsies of the shower gel, soap and loofa.I was well-pleased with the ablutionising up to now.

Aware that anything can happen still, I took extra care in the towelling off, and that went smoothly, too! This is great!

The medicationalisationing received even more care and patience from me… I did have a bad moment when the Germoloid cream was applied, a bit of balance-loss, but no real bother! I just had to adopt a Smug-Mode, Defcon Two-level!

: The freshening up and dressing caused the only real hassle of the whole session, right at the end. Grumph! Getting the fresh PPs on, and I lost my balance again lifting the leg up to get it into the pants, I turned quickly (for me), to use the shower chair to grab a hold off for stability. I misjudged the distance, (no glasses on), and clouted my left elbow this time, on the door frame.

Of course, it didn’t hurt at all, and I didn’t spit! Also, I refrained from using any bad language. Ahem!

I had a go at flushing the WC again, it needed two more, but I think things might be gone, now. I’ll nip back in a bit to check it again.

I noticed as I was struggling to get the slippers back on, that the new whatever it is coming on top of the right foot, seemed to be getting a little more noticeable. 

I wonder what it is?

I got to the kitchenette and got the kettle on for a mug of Glengettie Gold tea. Took the midday tablets.

Then I got on the step-ladder to lean out of the light & view-blocking, thick-framed new (obviously devised by a photographer, old-people-hating, overpaid, and germaphobia suffering) window designer. 

Herbert was tap-tapping and knocking away again, I’d love to know what he is making up there. Maybe its a model of the Sistine Chapel, a full-size pyramid or a pipe-bomb? Hahaha!

Got an update about Nottingham Coronavirus.Not looking good.

Well, the graphicalisationing went slow, Tsk! After hours, I’d only got two more done. I’m tired and have to keep awake for the food delivery coming. I can’t make-up and take the rubbish bags, because no one has told me if I can go out or not yet (04:40hrs) in the foyers?

I can’t take the carpet that needs taking up either. I’m weary and growing grumpy. The normal routine then!

I got some nosh prepared, and it was passable. Taste Rating: 6½/10.It was eaten slowly, during which, it dawned on me that I had got the dates mixed up for the Sainsbury order, thinking it was coming tonight, not tomorrow, the mind was in a terrible state of disorder.

I got the pots washed, took the evening medications as per instructions, and got down in search of Sweet Morpheus. It was like, a miracle; if that’s not too strong a word, I dropped off into the bliss of sleep within twenty minutes or so! Super!

The door chimes rang out waking me up, Oh, dearie me, again! I tried to ignore them, but they persisted, and I had to drag my elephantine body from the warmth and pleasure of sleep, to the door. It was Josie, once again calling late for me, to return the Sunday lunch things and some more uneatable (diabetes), chocolate biscuits for me! I realised as I was lip-reading what she was saying, that I only had my PP’s on! Embarrassment flowed!

Josie really can’t remember about me getting me head down early every day, it’s every week that she wakes me up, often more than once, but with the best of intentions. She forgets about my diabetes and brings me nibbles that I’m not supposed to eat nowadays, in thanks for the Sunday lunch, bless her. It’s not doing me a lot of good, because I can never get back to sleep again. I thanked the gal, and decided to take some photo’s of the screeded floor in the flats lobby, I was feeling wide awake, now! Tsk!

I’m not sure if the new flooring will go in the lobby areas or not. The mind was now, too active for Sweet Morpheous.

Poor Josie, we both suffer from bad memories, and I was coping with the discomfiture of answering the door, half-asleep and wearing only the PP’s, as well! What a pair we are! Between us, we could write a script for an old peoples comedy series. Hehehe!

I did eventually get back to sleep, but it took an aeon or two! Humbug & Grumblecronkackers!

Inchcock Reveals His Current Fears! – In Rhyme (Of sorts)

Believe it or not, Inchcock created this depiction of his Sock-Glide from memories of a nightmare, that the poor old fart suffered two nights ago. It’s so sad!

Inchcock Reveals His Current Fears!

Reading further may cause harm to your sanity!

Yes, he was young once… he still is, mentally!

Born, and got myself double-pneumonia,
Thrown in the canal, I nearly drowned in 1954,
I got rescued, only scared, wet and sore,
The medics said the boss is going to warn yer,
The Doctor said “You’ll never get brawnier”,
Next, I got shot, then the Duodenal Ulcer,
Top of the charts was ♫24hrs from Tulsa♫,
Then the hernia, and bladder cancer.
Had to have the ticker transplanted, years ago,
It doesn’t bother me now, though, 
Then I went and got shot again,
I knew my bad luck had to end, but when?
I stopped working in the Security industry, then!
I came off my motor-bike in the fog,
Out of hospital, had some police dialogue,
They fined me £20, speeding, I was agog!
Got a job driving a delivery van,
And became quite a Casanovan,
Got made redundant three times, lucky man!
Retired, well it was enforced of course,
But I had little remorse,
Got a part-time job, selling pickles and sauce,
When I reached 70, we had a discourse,
Then the Peripheral Neuropathy was diagnosed,
Got the tablets mixed-up, and overdosed,
They said stay indoor, well, I wasn’t opposed!

Then along came the stroke, of the ischaemic type,
Saccades, as well, of dear, this medical hype,
But I wasn’t one to moan and gripe,
I recovered, but physically, I’m a load of tripe,
They discovered I had diabetes,
Life became full of abstrusities,
My ailments seem to grow complexities.

Next, I’m using a walking stick,
Unbalanced, falling-over, it made me sick,
No choices then, at home I have to stick,
I fell, and gave my neck a crick,
I’m no longer the witty, clever-dick,
But I somehow cope, and that was fantastic.

Then along came to visit us,
The Corona Virus,
Isolation, no going out walking or on a bus,
Every day new instructions, what a fuss,
But at least I got rid of furuncle’s puss!
Until disabilities meant I couldn’t bend down,
And the worst, that really gets me down…
It’s bad enough doing your own syringes,
Is the bloody Sock-Glide, frame,
I gave it a go, I was really game,
But it keeps taking lumps out of my fingers,
And I don’t like these whinges,
Using the Sock-Glide means many cringes,
It’s not just the pain – mentally you’ll find it unhinges!

This claptrap was rit rote, written by Inchcock, with dedication and stupidity in support of the Peterborough & District Failed Philharmonic Orchestra Players, collection fund for the Bankers & Investors Roadkill Hospice Advocacy Society.

Inchcockski – Thurs 10 Sept 2020: Emotions ever-changing, highs and lows. Hey-ho!

Aha? TFZer gal, starts a business at the Cool-It-Cabin? ♥

Thursday 10th September 2020

Latin: September 10th Iovis MMXX

02:30hrs: I felt absolutely disconsolate at another almost totally sleepless night, and decided to give up trying, and get up! I need a pick-me-up, some luck, a roborant, or even some good luck, or even sleep will do nicely. The things I ask for! Mission Impossible comes to mind. Knacklewrangles!

Feeling a little brassed-off with the unrepairable reasons for my getting little sleep, I was aware that I was falling into the darkness. This I could not allow. So a mental search for options, that would improve my attitude was carried out before I’d even moved my body in the recliner. After a few minutes, the realisation that self-pity was developing, it does that sometimes.

I forced myself to perk-up, by thinking of all those much worse off than I am. I whistled to myself as I fought my way out the £300, c1968, non-operational recliner, caught my balance, grabbed the stick, and made my way to the EOGPB (Emergency-Overnight-Grey-Plastic-Bucket) to relieve myself. The wee-wee was for a change, a decent one, nearly normal apart from the colour, how the heck can I be passing light-green urine? Still, it was easy, painless, and no pre or after Micturition-Dribbling. Immediately, my spirits started sneaking up a smidge, a smile developed, the need for a mug of tea arose, and never kept to plans for the day were developing! I sang 1960 songs to myself as I hobbled with the bucket to get it emptied and sanitised…

As I entered the wet room, I stopped the singing of Ricky Nelson’s version of ‘Well my bucket a hole in it!’, as I gave myself one hell of a brutal, cruel toe-stubbing on the chair which supported the danged-nabbed sock-glide! Arrrgh! This seemed to bring on the pains on the souls of the right foot and ankle areas, just as they were yesterday.

Fancy that, I said!

Cleaned the EOGP bucket, freshened and antisepticated it, and went to the kitchen, taking extra care to avoid the bad-luck and painful, injurious to use, sock-glide, and avoiding walking into any doors or walls en route. Oddly I began singing to myself again! Cliff Richard’s Young Ones. Don’t laugh! Hehehe!

More old favourite songs and tunes came to voice as I was taking this photo of the morning view, Adam Faith, ‘The time has come’, Ricky’s ‘It’s up to you’ and whichever group it was that made a cover of ‘A little bit of soap’, amongst overs, flowed unmelodically from throat.

Another stroke of good luck when I did the sphygmomanometerisationing. Amazingly the SYS had gone down to 140! Wunderbar!

The stick thermometer was not in a mood for working, to start with. I had several attempts but just got low, no figures as to what the actual reading was.

Well, on about the fifth try, I got a figure of only 32.3°c, that’s really low methinks? Why? I’ve not got the foggiest.

Billy Fury, ♫I’m running around♫ was vocalised. Quietly of course, and well out of tune!

After I’d just put the machines away in the medical drawer, then SSS, aka, (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley) kicked off. Even this was not going to bring me down again. I sillily mocked the ailment, because instead of the usual ‘Just-at-the-wrong-time’, she’d cocked-up her attack, and missed her chance of making me drop, and possibly break some expensive gear. ♫ La la la la la Lala! ♫ Hehehe! I am such a fool!

As SSS calmed down, the whatever is in in the ankle began to get real tender, I took a look at it. Looks like it feels in this picture, tender. It even makes me jump when the legs of the trousers catch against it. Tsk! Worrisit? Surely it can’t be the Clopidogrel allergy. Because that has never hurt, Mmm?

I started to update the Wednesday Inchcock, and SSS, NN (Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters), and Reflux Roger were a bit of a nuisance and cost me a lot of time checking and correcting. But I got it finished at long last.

I don’t think that the annoying ‘Hum’ has been so loud for such a long time, ever before! I keep wanting to have a look outside to see if there are any fire engines with their pumps in use, its sounds just like it.

I got the fresh peas podded and in the saucepan. Then scrubbed some potatoes and got them in the crock-pot, with soy sauce and the fish vinegar.

The ablutions were tended to next. A proper-farce it was, but not due to Accifauxpas, or too many dropsies, for once.

I had a really smooth, best ever in weeks, session; apart maybe a nasty hitting the shoulder on the grab support when I dropped the soap. I’d got to the medicationalising stage, and the front door chimes rang out. There I was, naked, and a positive threat to anyone who may have to look at my elephantine wobbly body, so I wrapped the towel around my midriff and went to investigate. Surely it can’t be Josie this early, the thought that she might need help, caused me to hasten my hobbling speed to get to the door. I partly opened the door ajar, and peeked-out, but no lights were on in the lobby? Puzzled, I returned to the wet room!

I’d almost got the medicationing finished, and the landline rang out. I made it in time, it was my heroine Jenny. She said she’s left some tomatoes for me, home-grown from a relative, for me. We laughed when I told her where I was, when she called on me, Hahaha! I thanked her for thinking of me. ♥

Back to the wet room again, just furuncular cream to apply now.

As I got the tube in my hand, unfortunately, the right hand, to transfer cream to the left hand to use it with, SSS gave me a blast… and the cream shot out and upwards, landing in one long piece back down onto my bulbous stomach, and dribbled down onto Little Inchy as it broke up. I got it all cleaned up, but it was not easy getting back up again from the floor after getting things sorted. Tsk! It seems so funny now, but wasn’t so at the time! Hahahaha!

Herbert was tap-tapping a bit, but not too bad. Bless him!

I then got myself freshened-up and partly clothed. (No socks on, not that this was because I didn’t want to risk, or was afraid of using the blood-letting, finger breaking, sock-glide, of course! As if a brave, bold, young man like wot I am, would be so scared of using a plastic-coated metal, Satan-made article. Hehe, oh no! Ahem!

I got the towel onto the airer and retrieved the tomatoes that Jenny had kindly brought for me, from outside the apartment’s door.

I took a closer look at at the spots, papules, and scabbing, that had suddenly got more painful. I don’t think it is the leg ulcer, that has never hurt like this. Whatever it is, ulcer or something else, it seems to be spreading out down to the foot now!

Got the fodder prepped and eaten. The tomatoes from Jenny were okay, the yellow ones were marvellous. I ate it all up but struggled to stay awake to do so.

Took the pots to be washed, and heard a noise as I was doing so.

It was a hand posted letter from Nottingham City Homes, reminded us of the creeding being done on Tuesday 15th September, and we have to either leave the flat before 08:00hrs and not return until the work has been completed, or remain in the apartment until we are advised the jobs done, and the concrete dried. Fair enough!

Med’s taken, and down in the £300, second-hand, c1968, broken-not-working recliner, in search of Seet Morpheous. Who came very late on, but stayed with me for five blessed hours! Yippee!

TTFNski, haveth a great day!

Inchcock Today – Monday 7th September 2020:

TFZers gather at the Cool-It-Cabin! ♥

Monday 7th September 2020

Uzbekistan: 2020 yil 7-Sentyabr, dushanba

  00:15hrs: I woke with some lingering memories of dreams I’d been having, and fumbled to get the notepad and pen, to write down what I could recall of them. But by the time I’d dropped the pad, and got myself sorted out ready to scribble, the memory box had lost everything about the dream! So annoying innit? Tsk! 

While I lay there, silently swearing at myself, the urgent need of a wee-wee presented itself. All thoughts of the failed recollections of the dream were abandoned, and I heaved my grossly overly-stomached body from the £300, c1968, second-hand recliner, wobbled a bit, and got to the OGPEB (Overnight-Grey-Plastic-Emergency-Bucket), and suffered a rather painful PSC (Powerful-Sprinkly-Colourless) wee-wee. As I got the bucket cleaned and disinfected, I half expected the usual ‘within-minutes-of-waking’ summoning to the Porcelain Throne, but no, which surprised me.

I poddled to the kitchenette, and the view through the hanging washing covered, new light & view-blocking windows, revealed the moon in miniature again. So I got the Kodak PixPro AZ 651 bridge-camera, (sounds all posh dunnit?) and took a shot in the Aperture-Priority mode. Not too bad!

I got the Health Checks done then, starting with the BP sphygmomanometerisationing. Oh, dearie me! The SYS was still high, too high. Next, I used the stick thermometer to get the body temperature. Down a bit, at 32.4°c.

At the most inopportune moment, just as I was pouring the tea, SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley) gave me a good shaking, and I dropped knocked the mug over! Boiling water and hot tea went all over the counter, down the cupboard doors onto the floor. I thought how lucky I had been in not getting injured or scolded, and in the midst of cleaning up the mess, a sneaky Smug-Mode began coming on, but not for long!

As I was struggling to get up from the floor, I slipped on a patch of wet I’d missed, and clouted the top of my head and nose against the corner of the cupboard! It could have been worse, I anticipated a dirty great lump on the bonce, but there wasn’t. 

The Falls Team Member is calling to see me today. No idea what time, though. So, I got on with the updating of yesterday’s diary, so I could have time to get the ablutions done before he, she or they arrive.

SSS did not help any, but I stuck at it and got it done in a few hours. Pinterested some snaps from the blog. Went on the WordPress Reader, then Facebooking. Emailed the link, and replied to a couple of comments. Did some graphicationalisationing.

Aha! The call to the Porcelain Throne arrived, and off to the wet room.

The recent ten or so sessions have all been a struggle and time-consuming affairs. So I got the crossword book to hand – but by Jiminee, the movement almost shot out in one long, painful blast! Messy, pongy, and bloody.

Got a good clean up, and returned to the computer to press-on with the starting and updating of this blog. Off to do the ablutions.

Stand-up-Ablutionalisationing Whoopsies Progress Report.

  • Wee-wee: of the CLD (Cloudy-Long-Dribbling [but not painful]) mode taken.
  • The teeth cleaning: It went very well, I took it nice and steady, almost gently! Only one dropsy, the brush. No bleeding! Oh, no, the mouth wash bottle went as well, just the once.
  • Shaving: Dropped the shaving foam twice.
  • Shaving: Dropped the razors (5). As far as I can tell, only one tiny-weeny cut!
  • Body washing: Soap dropsies, Eight of them!
  • Body Washing: Flannel dropped three times!
  • Body Washing: Knocked the soap dish off of the sink as I removed the plug to soak the flannels after washing. No damage or bother, it is an old yoghourt pot I use! (Common as muck, me!)
  • Towelling off: No knocking over, off or into anything! Yee-ha!
  • Medicationalisationing: Dropped the Viscotears® liquid gel spray, I now have no Viscotears® liquid gel spray left, it broke! Cleaned things up and continued medicating other areas.
  • Medicationalisationing: Olive oiled the ear-holes.
  • Medicationalisationing: As carefully as is possible, I applied the Germolene to the largest carbuncle. Cleverly (I thought), avoiding Harold’s Haemmorhoids
  • Medicationalisationing: Then the Germoloid cream applied
  • Medicationalisationing: 
  • Medicationalisationing: 
  • Medicationalisationing: 

I went on the balcony to take some shots of the morning as it brightened up somewhat.

More work on this diary, and the intercom lit-up and the Falls Team lady, Caroline arrived.

The nurse went through my details and was very sociable with it.

During the time Caroline was here, Sister Jane rang several times, thinking that we would have been finished the consultation, and in the end, told me to ring her back when I was free. Hehehe!

The very patient Caroline, ended up arranging for a walking frame (Never thought this would happen to me!) that is narrower than usual to try out in the flat. And hopefully, get me back on a physio-course. I definitely felt so much better after the visit. Thanks, Caroline.

I then set about getting a wash to freshen me up and dressed to go out, and then rang Jane back. My xyrophobia, trypanophobia,  Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia, and belonephobia, suffering, over amour propred, sickenly good-looking Brother-in-law Pete, was at the City Hospital hospital today, for more flipping chemoradiotherapy treatment. I’ll ring him in the morning to see how it went.

I set out to the bus stop, on my escape from isolation, with the aim of getting some disinfectant from Poundland, and black washing liquid was the Bargain shop.

The mood in town was one of depression, that’s the only word to use. I have never seen Nottinghamians so dispirited in my life!

It brought me down with them. The gloom was almost overbearing.

I got off of the bus, called in Poundland, and came out after spending just £12.50, and limped to Milton Street, going in the Bargain Shop. I only spent £5.77 in there, so many things not available, but I did get the black washing liquid, still on a bargain price with a few other items, that were not essential.

A photographing hobble around down the depressing Clinton Street, right along Long Row, and up Queen Street to the bus stop home.

I caught a 40 bus, having to sit on the side-saddle seat, to have room for the trolley. A lady with a disabled scooter got on, and I was moved to an ordinary seat. But with no room for the three-wheeler walker guide! I had to grab onto it and move it each time someone got on or off the bus. Hard work. Hahaha! I was shattered by the time I got back to the flats. Hey-ho!

I got off of the bus without any bother. Alright! I caught my right knee on the trolley as it did its own thing lowering it to the pavement. It set Arthur Itis off for the rest of the day. Humph! Not that it mattered much, I was not going anywhere or doing anything productive much in the state I was in, Shackumed!

I say do nothing, I did make a large meal, and ate nearly all of it. A tasty feast really! A deserving flavour rating of 8/10.

I took the evening medications while dining. Put the plate and things in the sink to soak overnight, and washed/medicated certain bodily areas in need of doing.

I think this was the quickest I dropped off onto the land of Nod, for months!


In the morning, I made up a hopefully witty photo-ode of my trip out to Nottingham, before updating this blog. This is the link to it if you’ve not read it yet, I fank you!

A depressingly poor tale in ode of my escape from Isolation!

Inchcockski – Sunday 6th September 2020: Superabundant Kodak camera problems, but Sweet Morpheus was not denied!

TFZers in the ‘Cool-It-Cabin’

Sunday 6th September 2020

Scots Gaelic: Didòmhnaich 6 Sultain 2020

04:00hrs: After a miserable three-hours kip, I woke, with draughts coming in through the new balcony door, and making my shiver a tad. Nowt to be done about it, Warden Deana has reported the sliding door either coming off of the runner or about to collapse, to the Nottingham City Homes Maintenance department. The door cannot be closed or locked either. Tsk!

I got a bit off-track there, (Like the balcony door), Humph! I rose to my feet in for me, a sprightly fashion, and as I was grabbing Metal Micky (Four-pronged walking stick) the need for a wee-wee arose, swiftly followed by a call to the Porcelain Throne! So, off to the wet room. 

I got down on the plastic raised seat, and the wee-wee began trickling slowly, but persistently. Followed while still in motion, by a sharp, painful, ‘will-I-split-open’, evacuation! The damp thud as the product all in one gigantic torpedo clumped into the WC, I felt the water splash up, wetting my lower regions, and I removed my body from the seated position with haste, not knowing if it was blood, water, or a mixture of both that caused the early morning showering. Haha!

It was only water, Phew! How the great dollop evacuated managed to go down in one flush, amazed me! I had a clean-up and applied some Germoloid to the rear quarters. When drying, I must have caught one of the furuncles and started it bleeding, of a brownish-red colour. So had to clean up again! Picklementisis! All sorted out, but still a smidge sore, I hobbled to the kitchenette and grabbed the new Kodak camera and took a snap of the messy, unkempt kitchen. The square photo that it took, was disappointing, so I changed the setting and tried again. The second pone came out in the new dimensions, but it didn’t look as good. I wonder what I did wrong?

I got the kettle on, then used the Nikon to take a snap of the morning view. Gawd, the wind was a cold one that blew in when I opened the window. Cor, blimey!

I put some potatoes to marinate in the small crock-pot, with some fish vinegar/sauce.

Using the stick thermometer, I got a decent temperature reading, of 34.°7c, a lot better than of late.

I had a go at changing the Kodak settings. And what a kerfuffle it was getting it even understood, let alone doing the changes.

After a long time, and frustrations aplenty, I got the date and time changed. But the dang  Microsoft photo Gallery, was putting the pictures in the  June 2020 folder? At least I’d got the date altered, even if it was of no use or advantage to me. Grungrungrun!

I then tried to change the photo size, what a farce that was, with my Numberphobia, I guessed, and it came out rightish, but far too large?

After much mayhem, failings and self-recrimination, I gave up!

Well, it seemed the logical thing to do at the time, I was going bonkers!

Anyway, I took another Kodak picture, from the computer chair, at least the shape was right, just lucky, I’d not got the foggiest idea what I was doing, apart from messing everything up, that is.

I think the Kodak is cupboard bound. Until I can get someone who knows what they are doing to help me out.

Did a decent job for once, of updating the Saturday blog. Then I made an Iceland and Morrison order for next week. And it was time for the ablutionalisationing.

The session went alright, in fact, it went well, up until the getting medicated and getting dressed!

I cleared the top of the floor cabinet again, with the towel while drying. And it took me yonks to find where the Germaloid tube had fallen to. Somehow it ended up on the floor behind the WC, and it got wedged between a disinfectant and bleach bottle. Humph!

The nasty incident was, as one might expect, with the lethal, nasty, vicious, finger-trapping-bruising-blistering and blood-letting Sock-Glide-Gladys!

I came out of the fight, losing badly today. Bruised knees, cut and squashed finger, and a stubbed toe! I don’t care how cold it is tomorrow, I refuse to commit myself to such risk again! Damned thing!

Still, only one cut shaving, one showerhead dropping, which missed the feet and toes, and an involuntary right-leg Neuropathic Schuhplattler dances, but I didn’t go over! Quite cheered me up that!

I got the hand-washing done, rung and hung. A long sleeve t-shirt, pair of socks, and the bath towel. All in coathangers drying above the sink!

The wee-wees returned after the laundry was finished, and kept up for hours. Two or three barely a trickle, then the odd one like a torrent down a Mountain stream! This pattern stayed with me until the evening?

I checked on Josie’s nosh cooking, and made up three black rubbish bags and took them to the waste chute room, As I was coming out of the room, it was as if someone had turned on the dreaded, annoying, piss-taking ‘Hum’!

I got on with serving up Josie’s nosh, got it plated and on the tray. I was well-pleased with low the cheesy potatoes had come out. I’d added the usual Leicester cheese and sea salt, I added a knob of butter, chives, onions and chives from the spring onions. LAst of the fresh garden peas, boneless smoked mackerel fillers, Surami sticks, gherkins, and tomatoes. A strawberry and cream mousse, and low-calorie chocolate noughat bar, and a can of pink Gin and hit.

Got it delivered dead on time again, (as chefs go, I’m not too bad).

When I got back inside the apartment, the scene from the balcony had brightened up a bit, so I went out and opened the right-hand side window, the one with the spring-metal clip that needs pushing and pulling at the same time to open it. My Sock-Glide-Gladys injured middle finger, now has the Spring-Clip-Opener-Ossie bruised digit for company.

I thought it was almost a real-life copy of a Turner photograph. (Well, maybe not, then) But I thought it was a grand view, even with no sunshine.

While I was out there, with finger bleeding, I thought I’d take a picture of the car park at the end of Chestnut Walk. (Billumski in Ohio, see that, 3 black and Red pap-paps today)

As I was busy cutting my finger on the metal spring cli[p again closing the window, I spotted that the Woodthorpe Ankle-Snappers park was open and in use. So I opened the glass window with the lethal spring clip, again.

(I know no fear! Ahem! Hehe!)

I do love it around here when the grass is green! But I also love it when I can get out for a while. I’m not going to let yesterdays cock-ups, Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops get me down. I plan on going out in the morning to town, going in to see the girls in the Poundland shop and come back on the bus again. Of course, that depends on how I feel at the time, like. Oh, Botherations! I just checked the calendar to see when the INR blood test is due, and it’s not on. So, I got the last Result and dosage ticket, and blow me, the date of the next Vampire visit, had been cut off when I opened the letter! Wot a Cu… curiously thick twit!

Did a few hours of updating this post, and the weariness dawned. So, I’d better get the meal sorted out while I am able.

A worthy 7.5/10 for taste. I got the pots washed, took the evening tablets and got down in the £300, second-hand, c1968, cringingly beige-coloured, unstable, broken-down, uncomfortable, dusty, rusty, decaying, rickety, rachitic, recliner.

Sweet Morpheus came quickly. And I slept through four unbroken hours, without any wakings or calls for wee-wees! Great!