Inchcock Today: Sunday 7th August 2022 – Diary

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I woke in need of a wee-wee. Assessed the time I’d had sleeping; 3-hours… better than two!
While waiting for the after-leaking to stop, it took a while; I remembered the food delivery coming twixt 07:00>08:00hrs.
The feet and legs were looking just fine this morning. So good, I may advertise them as a pair of 1947 legs and feet for sale. Hehe!

So, I got the sphygmomanometerisationing tended to. Then, speedily got the body temperature taken before the sphygmomanometer turned itself off to catch both sets.
When I entered the results into the NHS DVT site, it would not let me put in 39 for the DIA, just told me that DIA has to be a minimum of 40. Please check your figures! So, I put 40 in to get a graph up. How frustrating to know that I must be dead with a 39 Reading. Of course, it didn’t bother me in the slightest.
At least I know that’s two of us old uns that is still alive. The arrogant, noisy snotty Herbert from above started a tap-tapping, clunk concerto. So he’s not snuffed it yet, either.
The view from the kitchenette window was so like an oil or water painting this morning. A Constable, mayhaps? Which reminds me, I’ve not seen a policeman on foot in Sherwood since January. No wonder crime has risen!
The intercom flashed, and it was the William Morrison order arriving. One of the most disappointing deliveries, other than Iceland’s, of course, that I’ve ever had. Here’s the sad, hardly believable story.
The men, through the goods into the two delivery boxes, naturally with cakes going in first, to be squashed by blah and water bottlers.
Got the things sorted and put away, but t’was not easy.

They had some of the Jacob’s Leicester Cheese cheddar biscuits. I bought four packets, as they are my favourites. Taking them out of the box. Do you notice only three on the counter?
Glad to report they have not substituted the Roast Vegetable Risotto, another of my personal favourites. That’s because one packet was torn open, and broken biscuits were all over the other food. I got them in a lidded tub and threw the other emancipated bits of bikkies into the waste bag.
Then, disappointed, they had swapped the vegan mushroom pate with a caramelised pork & onion version. Huh!. Still, Richard can have that in the morning.
The fridge looked mighty low in stocks, even after I’d got the fresh foods packed away!

The three packets of mini rolls were reduced to two; they were crushed but not as bad as the third packet, which had burst open, and I ended up washing off the sticky goo from other items delivered. By the time I’d sorted things out, I’d eaten a load of broken cheddar biscuits, a whole six mini rolls from the burst open and pre-mashed cakes. It all came back to why I stopped using Morrison direct and went to Amazon. But Morrison does not offer all their range when using Amazon, and when I read they had some Leicester flavoured cheddars, I just had to have some! Cragknangles! Sorry I bothered now!

MEAL-PREPPING: I spent the next few hours preparing Josie’s Chilli dinner. A bit of a mind-testing job… Why? I’ll tell yer!
①: The Iceland mushrooms that still had two days in-date showing; had shrivelled and gone grey. Comically, they had a Guarantee of Freshness sticker on the pack! So I had to use canned ones, which threw out my timing to get other things to be ready simultaneously
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②: Getting the potatoes done separately, as I usually do, so I can add some basil. I sliced them into Josie’s bite-size cubes and got a cut-down fingernail!

③: When I got the frozen leeks out of the freezer, attacked, I dropped the bag, and it burst on contact with the floor. I struggled to get things cleaned up, and Back-Pain-Brenda kicked in.
④: After much kerfuffling, sorting and swearing, I got the meal into one pan and on low heat to marinate.
⑤ By then, Guilt had set in when I realised all the cheddars and mini Swiss rolls I’d eaten while preparing Josie’s food.

Started blogging, at last. Not going too badly, and I went to check on Josie’s meal progress… I realised it was twenty-to-twelve already! I got the meal served up, cleaning up as I went along.
As I was lifting the finished tray… an epiphany! I noticed that the kitchen clock was showing 10:50hrs. Confused now! I nipped into the front room to check the watch time, and it concurred with the kitchen clock.
Had misread the wristwatch earlier. Oh, dear, what do I do now? I bravely took a gamble and delivered the meal to Josie’s door. Embarrassed beyond belief! I mumbled my pathetic Whoopsiedangleplop in getting the time wrong to Josie. I don’t think she was impressed. But she accepted the meal anyway. Like a guilty pet dog, I thanked her and scurried back into the flat. Red-faced and something of panic mode came over me.

Suddenly, I felt so tired, and a touch of Dizzy Dennis appeared. Waking up four hours later! Woken by the evening carer. I was not hungry, having digested the biscuits and cakes earlier, so I got myself down in the £300, second-hand, c1968, charity shop-bought, eyesorely-horrendously grungy coloured, haemorrhoid-testing, easily-falloutable, unfit-for-use, not working, recliner.

Arrived. Gave me the tablets one at a time but missed off the Codeine. Luckily I was more with after the kip, and I noticed. No nibbles or drinkies accepted in thanks, and he did not take the waste bags to the bin for me… and I forgot to ask her to. Tsk! She seemed a little withdrawn, just tired, methinks.

I got on with the updating of this blog. Well, this is going to take some time. Luckily the most activity was me, sleeping. Hahaha! Got the post done eventually.

Over an hour or so of slogging away on the computer, I took these three pictures of the sunsetting from the kitchenette window.
I liked the last one.

The legs, feet, and ankles were slightly inflamed after days of calmness.

I think an ulcer is doing its best to erupt on the left ankle now. The right one looks and feels a bit raw, so I took off my trews. It’s hot tonight, and I’ve got the balcony doors wide open.

I had a bash at the Snippets blog; I might get it finished. Then again… (I didn’t, but I did it in the morning).
Made a simple nosh. Curried chips (fries), tomatoes and fresh raw garden peas. I’d found eight escaped peas at the last count (Monday morning). The highlight was the one I discovered in the wee-wee bucket…Haha! Beats me: the bucket was about five feet from the recliner where I shelled and ate the peas and meal!
The last photograph of the evening sky taken from the kitchenette window. Bootiful Nature!

With the nodding of this afternoon, sleep did not come very easily or quickly. It did eventually, belatedly putting the TV on, helped, I think. Soon as the adverts came on, I was off into the land of nod!

Yee, Haa!

Inchcock Saturday 6th Aug 2020: Diary

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05:00hrs: I woke, feeling drained before I’d even moved. Checked the time and went through a Thought-Storming session for ages. Jumping from one subject to another, fretting, fearing, blaming and self-condemning. There were decisions, plans, and ideas; the thoughts cleared, amazingly, and I dropped off back into sleep…
This was the same as yesterday! Each and every one of the following wee-wees had after-leakage that, at times, was more than the original wee was! 06:05hrs: I stirred again, in need of a wee-wee.
I hope I will not need to see Dr Nallamothu, Urinary Tract Infections, again. I recall how unlistening and snotty she was with me on my last visit. This is why I’m hanging on, hoping this infection will clear on its own. The NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee Bucket) was filled within four trips, well, not filled, but it had too much in it to use it safely. I’m getting experienced in emptying and sanitising things nowadays. I wonder if the NHS just might have a job for a qualified Guzunder emptier at the hospital? Hehe!

This Canon photograph is of the morning’s great sky.
They used to stay, ‘Red Sky in the morning, Shepherd’s Warning’. Of rain… but there is nothing on the weather forecast about rain. According to the local news, the reservoirs have been at the lowest since records began. This is not good! Which we could do well with having.

Time to let the sphygmomanometerisationing flow. So I did. The body temperature at 34.1°f was pleasing again. Much better than last month.
The Blood Pressure readings, I thought, were excellent. But not the NHS recording site?
The attachment today was as written beneath the picture on the left here.
Which surprised me. The ‘it should be below 120/80 was a bit hopeful. I’ve never had a reading as low as SYS 120 in donkey’s years. This one was in the amber, as well?

Off to the Throne room, taking the crossword book with me, as I anticipated another session like yesterday morning, of solid resistance. But Constipation Konrad had lost control of the innards to Trotsky Terence now? How can things change in such a short time?

I made a brew of Thompson’s Punjana and raided the packet of pod peas for a nibble.

♫ Oh, Susana ♫ chimed loudly from the doorbell. It was Samantha. Got the medications sorted, listened to my waffling, picked her thank-you treats and was off like a shot. Taking the waste bag with her to the rubbish chute on her way for me.

At long last, I made a start on updating the Friday blog. Not a lot to do on it, but finding so many mistakes and correcting them, took me at least two hours. Humph!

Both kicked off together as I moved on to get this template started. This put a temporary end to the keyboard activity.

I decided to get the ablutions done while incapacitated from typing. Miss was a mistake! Of course, I know this now! As I approached the door, just for devilment, I’m sure, but an involuntary kicked off, and I felt myself going backwards… But I knew the door behind me was pulled to; I always close it behind me, you see, then in the event of a fall or tumble, I can slide down the softer than the floor door! Clever stuff, eh?

But, unbeknownst to me, the door was wide open, and I ended up flat on my back, clouting the back of my head a decent wallop on the way down! So much for making plans!
I got back into the main room on my hands and knees; that wasn’t easy with SSS shaking me about. I used the c1968 recliner to get myself back up on my feet. I was a little shook up but by no means incapacitated or proper poorly.
Found a couple of minor scratches on my arm, the back and head aching, but not severely. SSS gave me rest; at last, Anne Gyna was still stabbing across my chest, which was the worst of the ailments and injuries. Hehehe! I think my feeling a fool was embarrassing too.

I sat for a while to recover, a bit of shock, knowing you would hit the door and don’t, but instead, the floor! Thinking it through, I reckon Esther had left the door open when showing the lady who’s covering for her holiday where things were. No blame whatsoever; it’s my fault for not noticing the door was open… Ah, I’ll settle for blaming Cataract Cathy, then! Hehe! Oh, Back-Pain-Brenda has started now! It could have been a lot worse; I think they would call this ‘Good-Luck?’

Sister Jane rang, and we had a good long natter and gossip.

She’s struggling with her Doctor as well, and her eyes have not been looked at again yet.

Gave me a concert of clattering, but it was a small one. It could have been the 1812 overture! Hahaha!

I will get my feet up to eat the meal and hopefully fall asleep. Well, I hope so, at least. Got the potatoes in the oven and chilli in the pan.

Not very good; I got the subjects cut off. Still shaking a bit from the tumble.
I may take an extra Codeine to help counter Back-Pain-Brenda. Even so, I’ve got away lightly in that Accifauxpa!.
I got an email from Sainsbury’s. So it looks like the code through the post was genuine… at least I hope it was.

Took the Codeine, so I take it while eating, which might be more effective.
Sliced p[otatoes and veg-chilli out of a can this time. But still tasty; in fact, the chilli was a little hot for my tastes, but the more I ate of it, the less hot it seemed to get? Flavour rating: 6.5/10.
Arrived, she was chirpier this evening. Hard to fear what she was saying cause she has a habit, like Esther, of talking to me and facing in the opposite direction. But Val does not do it from another room. Hehe!
I got on the computer, and although hard work, mistakes, and correcting-ridden, I pressed on with this blog.

I went to make a brew of Thompsons Punjana, and the sunset was worth photographing.
I got the meal on my knee on the tray, then put the TV on, not that there was anything worth watching. I’ve got about 150 channels on complimentary view and not a sausage worth viewing that I could find. Noticed the lighting had changed as it came through the thin moth-eaten curtains! And went back to the kitchen window to take another shot, the bottom one of the two. Bootiful!. I think there were only ten minutes between the snaps being taken.
Then I got the blog finished and posted it to WordPress. Gone midnight now! No rest for the wicked! But I want to make a start on the following Snippets blog…

Inchcock’s Morning Musings – In Ode

Inchie Woke With An Idea For Today’s Blog Theme!

He went into Photographicalistical mode straight away. Well…

And after the traditional painful, challenging wee-wee,
He got his Canon camera and dropped it, accidentally,
Well, he’s getting senile now and rather elderly…
His thoughts and actions are slow, performed dottily,
He hurt his back, bending to retrieve it; he needed another pee!
Yet it still worked, so he took his first photo, jauntily…

He took it from the balcony,
The red van parked, again, illegally…
Yesterday, the lights shone brightly…
This photo came out fairish – a periodicity!

Clear morning, t’was no longer foggy…
The following two shots were taken in duplexity…
Top one to the north-east,
Second to the south-east,
Not so good these, my apology!.

He took an extra snap, using technology…
He’d zoomed in, to him that’s using gadgetry,
He went into a smug mode, as he did one correctly!
He even charged up the battery…
For him, that’s technological activity!

But the twerp couldn’t get the card to work
The computer was confusing the burke!
Card reader not recognised, he went berserk!
From his efforts, he did not shirk…
And by some miraculous quirk…
He got it to work, the jerk!

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After making a brew of Thompsons Punjana tea, stubbing his toe, and dropping the milk bottle, he cleaned the mess up. Took his CBD.

The formula was frivolously formulated for phrasemaking while Inchcock was busy cutting himself shaving. He can’t recall what it was exactly but decided that as he continued with his ablutions and medicationalisationing, he might get inspiration or a vague idea for a new plot. But, by the time he stopped the chin bleeding and utilised the Porcelain Throne, the earlier plan of his blog’s theme had plodded off into the ether, lost forever…

Teeth cleaning, nasal decongesting, and into the shower. Inchie banged his shoulder against the power-box (Dizzy Dennis to blame). Swore violently. Took his shower, then set about doing his medicationalisationings.

These went reasonably well (Did I say that?) The most painful bit of agonistically applying the stinging Betamethasone cream really was nowhere near the pain it usually was? This was a good start.

Treating Arthur Itis, Colin Cramps, Shaking-Shoulder-Shirley, Ankle-Ulcer-Herbert. Harold’s Haemorrhoids, Saccades Sandra, Duodenal Donald, Back-Pain-Brenda, Little Inchies, Fungal Lesion were all medicated. The none Carer and prescription items were applied to many parts of the body.

Saccades eye drops. He was gobsmacked at getting some of the liquid into the eye, for once. Of course, he managed to get some in his nose and mouth as per usual.

A second hobbling speedily attended visit to the Porcelain Throne was followed by taking two Dioctyl® capsules. To counter Trotsky Terence’s return! Messy, very much so! Took ages to clean things up afterwards.

Carer Richard arrived. Soon got the medications sorted, and he made sure I took them and didn’t drop any, bless him.

It was his last call, so he spent a little while having a chinwagging session with me. The lad’s gone through many similar procedures as I have, but poor Richard got them a lot earlier in his life. Which I appreciated.

He’s coped amazingly well with things. A caring bloke, too.

He seemed to be cheery,
And, off Richard did flee,
I had another pee…
Colour chart for the wee,
Was on number three,
Now six, it smelt musty!
Oh, back to the lavatory,
Oh, what a malady!

Well Into The Afternoon…

But no one had told Inchcock, the chatterbox…
Chattering to himself, sipping dandelion & burdock!
Thinking he may just wash his socks…
A message comes through on his voicebox…
Unsolicited mail, through his letterbox…
He forgets the socks: arrears in his Carer fees shocks!
Over £400 – Oh, Hollyhocks!
That’s not what he said, but it also rhymes with Bullocks!
He plans to get it paid by the following equinox!

Supplementary Information

A change of nosh style, I’m watching the size of my hips!
Vegetarian sausages, peas, swede and lentil potatoes…
C
hilli sauce, onion gravy, a banana, oranges…Oh, and chips!
I forgot to take from the fridge the tomatoes…
And now my rear quarters blows and blows!

The Nottingham Lads True Tales of Woe In Rhyme Series

Inchcocksi – Sunday 22nd November 2020: Ailments in a bad mood, and I did a lot of wittering

TFZers, but where are they?

Sunday 22nd November 2020

Greek: Κυριακή 22 Νοεμβρίου 2020

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Last night, try as I did, and I did, but I couldn’t get to sleep. So I got up, finished and posted off the blog. Nodded-off again! Yee-Haa!

02:45hrs: I woke (three-often-interrupted-for-wee-wees hours) in need of a wee-wee, but not urgently. I sensed and felt around the ailments, wriggled a bit and tested the legs, arms, wrists, ankles and torso, to try and self-diagnose, the little blighter’s veracity this morning.

I soon discovered that DD (Duodenal Donald) and SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley), (later on joined by Anne Gyna – badly), yesterdays agonies that were given to me, were both top-of-the-heap again, pain-wise.

But the search for a silver-lining revealed that Arthur Itis,  Reflux Roger, Cartilidge Cathy, Shaking Shaun and Saccades-Sandra and others, were seemingly in am empathetic mood with me! Bless ’em! So, as I tackled the mountainous task of heaving my crassulent, flabby, boing-boinging-stomached body from the clutches of the c1968 recliner, I adopted a kind-off; Hey-Ho!, attitude?

Having gone through the After-Stroke teams recommended balance-catching routine, the hobble to the wet room, was a struggle, but not for the usual reasons.  No straight loss of balance, no Dizzy Dennis, nor Arthur Itis problems! Just a difficulty with the misjudging of distances to my right-side. Had there been a CCTV in the flat, it would have reminded any viewer of Freddie Frinton and the Ministry of Funny walks! Hehehe! But, there was no going into anything or tumbles on the way to the wet room, and the need of the Porcelain Throne arose en route.

How can things with the innards change so often? I’d been sat down for a few seconds, and without any warning, the evacuation began. Ooh, argh! And all done! No mess, no bleeding at all! How so much came out in such a little time amazed me! A bit of discomfort, but no pain as such, either! A 1-1 draw, between Constipation Konrad and Diarorrea Duncan. And, one flush cleared the elephantine mass away, too!

Anne Gyna was now taking over as Primo-Pain-Profferer, as I got in the kitchenette to make a brew. Got the kettle on and took this half-decent, semi-zoomed photograph, of the morning view, from the hard to get at to clean, light and view-blocking window.

Maed a mug of Glengettie tea, and into the main room to do the Health Checks and take the medications.

Anne Gyna was continuing to give me grief! I must ask the Doctor about this on Monday, or ring 111, but they only tell you to see your Doctor, which is not going to be easy.

Got the sphygmomanometerisationing was done. The SYS was well down on yesterdays reading, at only 142! The pulse up a tad at 90, but I don’t think that’s a problem… I’ll ask Dr Google. Yep, okay! ‘Between 60 and 100 beats per minute (bpm)’

During the time since the Porcelain Throne visit, I’ve wee-wee’d eight times? Ah, well! I took the medications, with an extra Dioctyl® capsule, and Codeine 600g, but it isn’t helping ease Anne Gyna in the slightest, fed-up with this. But I reckon it did ease BPB later.

I made a start on this blog, in between several more SWSI (Sprinkly-Weak-Short-Itchy) wees.

Then went on CorelDraw, to do a few graphics for the diary-top.

Getting artwork from the web to amend, I found the latest Coronavirus figures for Nottinghamshire.

Blimey, Anne Gyna is giving me some high-quality hurtful stabbings! I had a wee-wee, and ent to make another brew, Thompsons Punjana this time. I made up some small waste bags while the kettle boiled, and put them in the box, and onto the three-wheeled walker, ready to go down with some others later on.

Back to CorelDrawing. I ended up sorting some files out that I’d got mixed up, but still haven’t got any graphics done – Humph!

The feet were humming a little, so I took a look at them. They were fluid-retentioning again, I think, and the nails getting longer than ever!

I got the ablutionalisationing done. Not too much bother, not the showering caused owt worth mentioning. Multi-dropsies and a crack on the back of the head, when I was getting back up after retrieving the shoer-gel bottle for the umpteenth time.

The dressing was a struggle, and the medicationalisationing went well enough.

Then I got the small waste bags added to and stacked them in the box on the trolley-walker guide.

As I was doing this, the landline flashed and rang. It was Brother in law, Pete. We had a good chinwag. I was updated, on how Pete’s radiation treatments for his cancer had gone.

Next week he goes back for a cat-scan again, to have a look at how things are reacting the treatment he’s had. Fingers crossed! I told him Tim and Billumski on WordPress sent there best wishes.

Cheered him up a bit, I think!

Back to the rubbish sorting. Out and along by the lift lobby to the waste room chute.

Bit of a farce getting into the room. A bigger struggle to get the bags into the tiny opening. Trapped the finger (the same one as yesterday) in the heavy metal lid.
A further kerfuffle getting the trolley out of the chute-room, trapped my ankle against the door and wheels of the guide. Well, it stops me getting bored, dunnit! Hahaha!

I took this photograph from the window near the waste-room door. Some Crows were flying about, but by the time I’d got the camera out they were long gone.

I even managed another moment to have a hullabaloo going back to the flat. A cracking well aimed for maximum pain, toe-stubbing, against the trolley!

I think I said ‘Well, fancy that!’ at the time.

I returned back to the flat and got on with doing Josie’s nosh.

I felt a little unexpectedly irritable with myself while doing the food prepping, but buggered if I know why? Got the meal delivered dead-on time again, midday! This is not the real meal delivered today, I forgot to p[picture it, and used an old one – Cheat!

Things went pear-shaped then! I had to go for another Porcelain Throne visit. So much blood came out, everything else of the visit was unimportant and forgettable. So I forgot it! I spent a good while cleaning up and medication, during which I found that both Little Inchies Fungal Lesion and Harold’s Haemorrhoids were bleeding! This actually eased the mind, at least I know why all that flood of blood escaped. Not feeling so good, now.

It made the PPs look pretty in red and white, though. Hahaha!

All calmed down now, I had a very late brekkers of the left-over cheesy potatoes with chives, sea salt, Leicester cheese and butter, from Josie’s nosh. Jolly good they tasted too!

BPB and DD were both still in attendance, and I was trying to do some graphicalisationing, but it was a hard slog with the concentration all shot.

And early head down was demanded. So I got on with making the main meal.

I added some tomatoes and peas to the Chilli-Con-Carne in the saucepan and made sure I checked it every few minutes, in between doing a Thoughts graphic for later use.

Put some part-baked rolls into the oven, and turned off Computer Katie.

Made up the evening pots of medications and put it on the ottoman, to take while eating. (Unfortunately, I failed to do so, but corrected this later when I woke up).

As you can see, I didn’t manage to eat all of the Chilli-Con-Carne meal, all as part of my self, and Doctor-imposed new diet. (Ahem!)

As I got down to watch something on TV, erm… whatever it was, Anne Gyna suddenly stopped her day-long marathon of giving me grief, it was like an Angel turning off a tap! Although Duodenal Donald and Back-Pain-Brenda were continuing with their assault, the relief at Anne Gyna retreating from the battle was almost frabjous, and appreciated!

Ah, yes, gorrit! It was an episode of Hell’s Kitchen that I wanted to watch, with Gordon… Hang on, that’s wrong… Erm,  ah, Kitchen Nightmare. The brain’s going on one of its ‘Work-to-Rule’ episodes, again.

I watched the first part, and when the adverts came on, I thought I’ll nip through and get the pots in the sink to soak, which I did. It took me that long to get up, simply put the cutlery, dish and tray in the sink, and get back, and the next part of the programme had started. And we all know how long the Freeview commercial breaks can last! Hehehe!

At the second commercial break, I remember seeing the evening medications still in the plastic pot on the ottoman – and vaguely thinking, I’ll take them now… and I fell asleep!

I woke at 23:00hrs. Hey-Ho!

Inchcock – Fri 11 Sept 20: Now I’m booked in for Bladder and Bowel scan, Diabetes course, Dentist, Cardiac Reassessement and Physiotherapy. Getting busy innit?

TFZers Celebrating at the new ‘Cool-It-Cabin’. ♥

Friday 11th September 2020

ODIA (Oriya): 11 ସେପ୍ଟେମ୍ବର 2020 ଶୁକ୍ରବାର |

Indo-Aryan language is spoken in the Indian state of Odisha. It is the official language in Odisha (formerly known as Orissa) where native speakers make up 82% of the population, also spoken in parts of West Bengal, Jharkhand, Chhattisgarh, and Andhra Pradesh.

04:10hrs: Well, what a waking up it was this merry morning! I was in a depressive state of clinomania, on a right-downer. Sensing that this phenomenon was due to a dream I’d been having, but not certain. The Thought-Storms began, and this only confused me more than ever. By the time I’d jumped to another worry, I’d forgotten the previous fear or concern that I had been battling with… a soupçon of sadness, too – but what at? Blurblecrubs!

I should be feeling great, after all, I’d had about five hours of sleep and a dream that I think was a nice one. For a minute or two, I was reconnoitring within the brain-box trying to find some understanding, then it dawned on me, ‘It didn’t matter one iota’. I sneezed heavily, and instantly felt the need for an urgent wee-wee! But the brain was still not too interested. But the bladder forced things along. I grumpily, labourously made my way to the wet room, having to increase my hobbling-pace as I felt the ominous PMD Pre-Micturition-Dribble) leaking.

I got there before the main show, and after the pathetic tinkling wee-wee, I washed and had to divert from putting on the new PP’s, and get sat down for a Porcelain Throne session. But things were as solid as a rock, the movement nudged and stuck, but the pain continued, yet again. Lucky Sod Me!

I was sat sitting there on the Throne for about fifteen minutes. Just too painful for me to try and rush things along, so I got the crossword book out. Do you know, I got more answers in that sat-there time than I have for weeks! Amidst the agony of each innards-controlled edging things along, I found myself singing ♫ ‘Bring me sunshine, in your smile, Bring me laughter, all the while, In this world where we live, There should be more happiness, So much joy you can give, To each brand new bright tomorrow ♫ (Can’t remember any other words, Hehe!)

The last long agonising evacuation was even more painful, but that did not stop me singing to myself, and even trying to whistle while I washed, medicated the rear end, and got new PPs on. In about half an hour or so, I’d gone from miserable to merrily soliloquising, and now, even a little light-hearted? (Worra change!)

I actually had some breakfast this morning! (Oh, Yes! – Smug-Mode-Engaged!) Fair enough, not the healthiest, but still. A pot noodle and a banana to follow!

Then I got the computer on. In between many PWWWs (Pathetically-Weak-Wee-Wees), and Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters failures, I finally got it finished, many hours later. With no mugs of tea, but many a wee-wee! Hehehe!

As I pondered on whether to make a brew or not, I did fancy a Glengettie, I felt like a tasty treat… Then it dawned on me, I have not taken any medications or done the Health Checks! (I thought I was doing well, Humph!) 

I limped rather steadily to the kitchenette, and put the kettle on and then got the stick thermometer to take my temperature with. Using the Kodak camera. I did the usual and took a photo of the reading. No, I can’t read it either. Grumph!

Got the medical hemadynamometer, or is it called a sphygmomanometer, I ain’t sure, but anyroad, the results for the Sys was back up high again. Dia and Pulse look to be okayish to me?

Made the first brew of the day, belatedly, mind, and back to the computerisationing. I Pinterested a few snaps, went on the WordPress Reader section, Emailed the link, and answered all of the comments, well, the comment. Poor old devil!

Time to get the ablutions done now. A quick PWWW first.

  • Then, I launched a little too enthusiastically into doing the teeth.  Toothache-Trevor got very annoyed with me and showed his displeasure in the usual way. Argh!
  • Also dropped the mouth ash bottle, but yet again, it didn’t break!
  • Nasal Hygiene Spray:  Got the dropsies with it this, as it hit the floor, the sprayer at the end of the can, snapped off! I hope to be able to find it when I get around to cleaning the wet room sometime. Tsk!
  • Shaving: Ah, some good news here, only two razor dropsies, and one wee nick under the chin!
  • Stand-Up Wash: Pretty good, and I think that the old ankle ulcer, is getting paler again, but still spreading out as if it wants Lebensraum! Haha” Not pleased with this new camera! Of course, it will most likely be something I’m doing wrong, Humph!
  • Towelling off: With not having got the shower wet, it was easier to avoid knocking anything over on the floor cabinets!
  • The Sock-Glide was not fought, or fraught again this morning. No socks on got to wait in for the big-letter landline phone being delivered, by Amazon. Nothing to do with my being, nervous or scared of using it, naturally. Oh, no!
  • Medicationalisationing: I put some Savlon cream on the ankle ulcer. Germoloid (It’s good stuff, really calming!) on Harold’s Haemorrhoids. I think there is only on furuncle left that is big enough to give me any bother, creamed that as well. Phorpain gelled the knees, wrists and the wear & tear induced Osteoarthritis in the finger knuckles. I even managed to get some Phorpain on the back, cause Back-Pain-Brenda is starting to kick-off again.
  • Although I didn’t go over when getting the fresh PPs on, it was a close call. Dizzy Dennis to blame.
  • Of course, I was proud of my sheer guts, abilities, dexterity and bravery in avoiding going over! Mind you, I did hit my shoulder against the door frame, setting off SSS Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley! By the time I got out, SSS and BBB were joined by Reflux Roger in making me a little uncomfortable. Criggleblogsworthisms!

Got dressed (No socks of course), and sorted some black waste bags and a big recycling sack to take down to the bins. Got them on the three-wheeled-walker, and added some treats for Jenny that I forgot to take yesterday.

 I nipped back inside, to make a nervous check to ensure I had not left the heater on, lights, stove (apart from the slow cooker), or anything else missed.

All looked good, and I made my way to the door again. I found another hand-delivered letter reminding us all on the 12th, and 13th floors, that the screeding (Screeding a floor is a simple act of applying a well-blended mixture of Ordinary Portland Cement with graded aggregates and water to a floor base, in order to form a sturdy sub-floor that is capable of taking on the final floor finish or act as a final wearing surface) was being done on Tuesday next, the 15th September.

I got to the waste chute room and deposited the small black bags down the shaft, problem-free. (Smug-Mode-Adopted) Got the lift down to the ground floor, and had the pleasure of having a little mini-chinwag with Frank and Doris.

Then out and put the big bag near the bin. By gum, it was windy out there, not cold with it, mind you. I limped with the trolley-guide along Chestnut Walk to the Winnwood Court main entrance and made my way inside. Said my hellos to Wardens Julie and the new gal. (I think Deana is on holiday)

Departed and noticed that the tub flowers outside the door on Woodthorpe Court were getting a battering in the wind. No bodies were around as I got inside the lobby. I caught the elevator up to the 9th floor, and put the bag near Jenny’s door, rang her bell, and departed back to the lifts. Up to the 12th floor and back in my apartment. All without seeing a soul on the way back.

As I opened the door to manipulate the trolley guide in, and yet another Hand-posted letter had been delivered. This one was about giving each tenant a chance to vote for one of three flooring options that we fancy A B or C. Box to post back, in the ground floor lobby.

Herbert was keeping company with the odd tap-tapping, while I updated this blog.

 Getting late now, the weariness is setting in. And the landline phone burst into life ringing and flashing, it made me jump a bit. Hehehe! I answered it, and it was a lady from some NHS medical department, but I didn’t catch the proper name of it.

I had been referred to them by Caroline of the falls team. After a lot of her trying to find me a place that is open at the moment, the Sherwood one is still closed, and her efforts found me an appointment for me to have a  bladder and bowel scan done. The only place available was St Anne’s Health Centre, and she got me an appointment for 10:15hrs, on October 15th. (I think). She will send me a letter, with a lengthy questionnaire (she warned me) in it, for me to fill in, and a leaflet about the procedures I’m to go through. Gulp! 

I updated this diary again for an hour or so, then thought about getting something prepped for eating.

The door-chimes rang out their Dusty Springfield’s tune of ♫ I only want to be with you ♫. I got some clothes on as quickly as I could and meandered swiftly to the front door. It was the Amazon delivery of the new big-button old second-hand landline phone. It had been left on the floor outside the door.

I bought it in and left it near the radiator. And returned to the front room to save the computer work, then get the meal sorted out.

The door-chimes rang out their Dusty Springfield’s tune of ♫ I only want to be with you ♫ again. Aha, thought I, the driver, might have forgotten something. Back to the door, and there on the floor, something I adore, a bag of yellow tomatoes and a note, from Jenny, bless her. These fruits will become part of tonight’s nosh now! Thanks, Jenny!

I started to get the fodder for the night sorted out, and guess what, The door-chimes rang out their Dusty Springfield’s tune of ♫ I only want to be with you ♫ for the third time!

Well, blow me down with a feather duster!

This time, I was at the door within a minute or so, only to find nothing? The motion-lights in the lobby had not even been activated? A Ghost perhaps?

(Aye, the mysterious wonders of Woodthorpe Court: The Ghosts, Hobgoblins, Boll-Weevils, Aliens, Gremlins, Karakia-cursing entities, Hallucinations. Materialisations, Poltergeist, Lemures, Wairuas, Kehuas, Manifestations that permeate, pass through the pores and interstices of space, through the time-continuum. Usually, without rupture or displacement within the building. To cause havoc, fear and frustration, as they dislodge time itself, in their aspirations and skulduggery, to complete their given by Satan mission; ‘To annoy and scare the bejesus, out of the old Inchcock’).

Back sorting out the meal again. For once, I remembered to take the before-eating medications, leaving the after-meals ones for later. I’ve not done this for ages, I must make more effort on this in future!

The yellow tomatoes were tasted grand, the potato farls fine, everything else passable—a flavour-rating of 7/10. (Must do a Sainsbury order for next week in the morning! – a self-reminder this is really)

The pots were washed, and I settled down to watch the A-team on the telly. Fell asleep and woke up to the ending credit rolls. Tsk!

Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley ensured that I could not get to sleep again, for ages. Humph!

Inchcock – Wednesday 17th June 2020: Lots of lucubrationing, fretting and failures today!

Wednesday 17th June 2020

Serbian: Среда, 17 Jуна 2020

03:00hrs: I stirred into life, with a raging headache. For a moment or two, I lay gathering what senses I could.  Then traces of the dream I’d been having, came back to me, in some detail too! I grabbed the pen and notepad from the Ottoman, and scribbled down the finer points, as the memories faded again. Later, when I get a chance, I’ll go through them and let you know what real insanity I dreamt of.

The need of the Porcelain Throne arrived, and I disentangled my ultra-thin limbs, and overly-stomached, flabby belly from the £300, second-hand, c1968, rickety recliner. I got up on my feet and caught my balance without much bother at all. (Smug-Mode-Adopted!) Got the stick, and off to the wet room.

Without a doubt, this Porcelain Throne session was the easiest I’ve passed in many a month! But it was a messy one. Took no time at all, but cleaning up afterwards was a long, unpleasant job. Ah-well, can’t win ’em all! Still, the feet were looking a smidge better now. Not the Howard Hughes toes, though!

Sanitised and refreshed, I poddled off to the kitchen…

  Where I found the freezer door ajar! I closed it as quickly as I could. But it must have been opened for several hours. I dare not open it again yet. I’m praying some of the stuff will be useable when refrozen. Not that I am not expecting to be able to use much of the produce in it when I do. Just hope for the best. It is cram-packed full in there – and the possibility of my having to throw it all away. Bagging the waste-material into small bags so that they will fit in the tiny opening in the waste-chute. Too many trips to and from the room. Bending to get the stuff out, all put me on a bit of a downer. And I was hoping for a better day today, less stress, fewer incidents… Fool!

The fog had descended. There’s not much of a view outside this morning. I got the medicalisationing equipment out to do the Health Checks. I dropped the stick thermometer, but it still worked when I retrieved it with the picker-upperer.

The resulting figures all looked okay to me. No problems on the sphygmomanometer. The temperature just showed as ‘low’. If I’m not quick enough to get the instrument out of my ear-hole, the reading changes to low or high display. I was not fast enough – The story of my life there! Hahaha!

When I got to download the pictures later, I found this mystery photo? After applying my Sherlock Holmes-like investigative skills, I thought it was taken in the kitchen. When Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley had a little play with me. I took the medications and made a brew of Glengettie Gold tea.

At long last, I got on Computer Cameron. I made up a template for today. Then I started updating yesterday’s blog.

I finished it and had a look at the notepad with the scribbled dream memories. But my handwriting was so atrocious, much of it was indecipherable. Tsk! Using a bit of recollection and the writing that I could understand:

  • I was throwing food from the cupboards out of the window on the balcony.
  • A crowd gathered and started shouting for specific items, Bacon, cornflakes, bread and pickled, onions were amongst them as I recall.
  • Police cars arrived and arrested the crowd, presumably for not Social distancing?
  • When the Marias arrived, and the citizens were taken away, more Officers arrived, each with a shopping list!
  • A Tannoy was used, as they shouted up for what they wanted.
  • One chap asked for cheesy mashed potatoes. I explained I haven’t made any. The policeman Tannoyed back, ‘Yes, you have, on the second shelf up in your fridge!’ Then threatened to arrest me if I failed to find any for him?
  • I threw some requested Glengettie tea bags out, and then I went to look in the fridge.
  • Sure enough, a little like Dr Who’s Tardis, I opened the fridge door and walked into it. There were stacks, piles of food, and inside was as big as a football pitch! Hundreds of my plastic plates with cheesy potatoes, too!
  • I was forever going to the fridge for more cheesy potato meals and back to the balcony.
  • They had set-up a winch system now.
  • I’ve no idea why, but Police Helicopters and red coloured Tiger Moth planes filled the skies?
  • The doorbells rang out their usual ♫ I only want to be with you, ♫ tune.
  • The hallway outside was cram-packed with people vying to get me to adopt a giraffe, panda or Elephant, supply drinking water, pay for medications, and to take out an over 50’s death policy. Argh!

Many other things happened, but nothing clear comes to mind. I think the dream ended as I was fighting off the insurance and charity mob. I’d written down three pages of memories on the notepad. Undoubtedly, one of my curioser, more vivid dreams, methinks. The nightmare bit was those ‘Over-50’s’ sellers!

It took me some time to get the tale of the dream done, (And three variable wee-wees). I went to make another brew, with hopes of getting this one drunk. Haha! 

I spotted through the mist and fog, a couple taking their dog for a walk. I did my best to photograph them, on Auto setting, but it didn’t come out too well.

Then, I went on TFZer and Winwood Heights Facebooking. The mist is less now.

Time to see if I can get an order in for Morrisons. The last few times it’s taken between 2 to 4 weeks. I’ll give it a go.

Got it done! But I had to wait until Tuesday 30th June for a delivery slot. And that is a bit late in the day one. Unfortunately, 16:30 > 17:00 hrs. But the waiting doesn’t matter, as I have so much food in the flat at the moment, you wouldn’t believe how much!

Scary innit? Hahaha! By the time it arrives, I should be ready for it. In thirteen days, there should be room for it. Being the Unglefrogwoggling idiot that I am, I’m sure the recent Blank-Spots and Spells are the cause of my ordering food and not remembering, I’d done so.

I rang Sister Jane and Pete, as they have not answered my two emails sent yesterday, see if they are okay. The line (It always is) was bad, Jane rang me back. That was a bit better for hearing and understanding. Pete arrived near the phone, I wished him well with his experimental treatment at the City Hospital! When the conversation became three-way, I was lost altogether. Pete departed to do some shopping and check on his bank balance and investments. I then needed another visit to the Porcelain Throne. We parted, and I shot in the wet-room. When I say, shot…

I sat, sitting there for ages, convinced that something was about to erupt. But, No! Nothing moved, despite my firm belief that it was ready and willing, the innards refused to allow any evacuation! Still, I got a few more clues answered in the crossword book. 

Off to make another brew, this time of Thompsons Punjabi tea. I took a shot of the weather, still a bit misty, no signs of any rain. It doesn’t look the slightest bit like it’s going to be any precipitation! Inchcock wrong again!

Then I had a thought (I occasionally do), it doesn’t look like rain. So why are Arthur Itis’s knees losing pain and gaining stiffness? Every time they have done this in the past, rain or even a storm had come on the same day. I don’t suppose it matters, but my EQ faith suffers.

I had a check on the weather. That’s the weather than I was certain would produce rain today. Grobbleatkins!

Back to Computer Cameron, and went on the WordPress Reader section. That took me over an hour. I’d got behind with me reading, with the activity of the last few days. All caught up now.

I wet on the Nottinghamshire Live Full News Site. Here are the first few headlines on the page: Just to cheer you up, like!

Girl Found Dead in Nottingham Park.

Police close bridge as ‘pools of blood’ found following Nottingham shooting.

A teenager has been locked up after he stabbed a 20-year-old man during a “gruesome and violent” attack in Nottingham.

Millions of people in Beijing under new Coronavius restrictions. There have been 137 new cases in the last six days!

To make my day, the next page gave April’s Nottingham crime figures for my postcode.

Shuddering Shoulder Shirley kicked off again. Making doing any work on graphics impossible until, if, she gives me a break.

So, I got the nosh going. Despite my feeling half out of it, it was a decent looking and tasting effort, a little too much for me to eat it all, but I gave it my best shot! Flavour Rating: 8.2/10! After having eaten what I could of it, I was feeling more alert and aware of things.

Taking the things back into the kitchen to get them washed, it looked like an explosion had taken place. The mess I’d left from the cooking made the place look very untidy, a sausage lay on the floor near the stove, along with two halves of tomato, a fork, and an unidentifiable tablet—one of the small ones that all look the same, Furesomide, Beta-Blocker or a Codeine 30g. I think I was lucky that I didn’t leave the stove on, tap running, or window open. Shame-Mode-Adopted!

I tidied up a bit and got the washing done. And planned to get back to watch a re-run of a 2016 Euro match. Eventually, I got my head down to view the footy. Fell asleep, but woke up to see the penalty shoot-out, at least.

I got the headphones on, to watch and listen to a documentary on Channel 25, Freeview, there were not any subtitles on the programme.

However, when I went to make a brew, the EQ predicted rain arrived, but not a lot of it.

My new headphones on, and fell asleep, as expected. My waking up was a bit scary (Not really, but it made me jump). The right earpiece cover and foam, which I discovered was just stretched over the plastic, fell off. Falling down my shoulder, followed by the headphones, onto my Brobdingnagian-sized flobby-stomach is what woke me. I wondered what the heck had happened at first. Haha!

I set about trying to put the cover back over the ear-part. Not a good job, but it will do for now. Humph! 

Sweet Morpheous was reluctant again. Gragglespitness!

Inchcock – Tues 16 June: Wristwatch, camera, the 7inch hair mystery and more. (Sorry it’s a bit long, one of those days!)

TFZers: Garden Party?

Tuesday 16th June 2020

Hungarian: 2020 Június 16., kedd

04:00hrs: I lay there on the c1968, rickety recliner for a good while, assessing my situation mentally and physically.

After a mild form of organisation was gathered in the grey-cells, the first thing was to check the time on my Charity shop-bought £2 wristwatch. It was not on my wrist.

Well, fancy that! This not only confused me but annoyed me. All my energy and concentration went on a search for the timepiece.

It was paramount to me that it had to found! But it wasn’t! Despite heaving and hauling my colossal-bellied body from the none-working chair, and ferreting about looking for the watch. I got the torch and picker-upperer and looked underneath the furniture.

Getting back up on my feet was a bit painful, particularly the back and Howard Hughes-like toenails!

Where signs of nocturnal-meandering activity were diagnosed. Down there, was the TV and DVD remote, and a pen? But no, wristwatch!

I looked in the kitchen, then the wet room, and rechecked them both! Back to the recliner room. I had to force myself to stop the search and seek mission. I was getting so uptight and self-critical over the loss. I told myself that it was a temporary irremediable situation. I didn’t like or believe it, but something had to be done to stop my going addictively bonkers.

It didn’t really work though, as I went for a wee-wee, I kept looking in the silliest places for the watch. The need for the Porcelain Throne arrived at the same time. Which was one of the easiest evacuations for a long time? A smidge of bleeding, but not messy. It was over swiftly, and little odoriferousness either. This should have had me moving into a Smug-Mode, but the worrying over the lost-timepiece was ever-present.

For the first time ever, the wee-wee followed after the big evacuation? A new style as well. I Christened it as an SWP (Sprinkly-White-Painful) wee-wee.

Limped off to the kitchen. The morning view, albeit a later one this Tuesday, was a little misty. But when I opened the window, it was incredibly mild, I thought. Ah, one there for Bill, a red car! Hehe!

I had a rummage around and searched in the daftest of places in search of the watch. With no luck!

BP sphygmomanometer readings were pleasing and should have cheered me up a tad. All were looking better. The thermometer just showed as ‘Low’, but this missing timepiece was still wrangling at me!

I took the medications, then made a brew. A thought suddenly came to me (they occasionally do), had I dropped my beloved timepiece in a waste bin? After searching through all four of them, I found out I hadn’t. Grumblegrobbledamn!

I started updating yesterday’s post. Diligently making many miss-typing and spelling errors! Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley had started off again, Tsk! After a couple of hours, I went off limpingly to make another brew and needed two, I say, two, SWP (Sprinkly-White-Painful) wee-wees! (I’m not sure how much longer the carpet from the kitchen to the wet room is going to last, Haha!)

It seemed the mist was getting a little thicker as the morning went on? This time when I opened the window to take this photograph, it seemed a lot colder out here than it did earlier on? Brrr!

Another forage around in cupboards, drawers, etc. failed to find the £2 watch! Sob! Yet another wee-wee! Washed hands and contact points, and back on the well-trodden carpet in the hall, to Computer Cameron, and got the Tuesday blog finished at last. Despite Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley, and Back-Pain-Brenda’s attentions!

I then got a message on the mobile. I had a look, and it was from Iceland. Telling me to check emails for details of changes to my order. What order, I thought? Then I investigated. Finding I had an order in for today, twixt 15:00 > 17:00hrs. Pathetic, I know, but I could not remember making an order for today? After examining the goods on the list, there was no doubt about it, the items were all things I might have ordered. A vague recollection of my looking at the ham misshapes?

Then, I noticed an Amazon email arrived. I used the tracker and got the map up, which means the delivery is close.

Ah, this could be dodgy time-wise, so I stopped and to get the ablutions done.

Not such a good session this time. I reckon this was because I was trying to rush it, in case the Amazon delivery arrived with the reusable facemasks. The teggies were done without any Whoopsies.  The shaving, well, there was a few.

The hairs were growing around the ear-holes, and I decided to use the razor to cut them. This did not work, so I got the scissors… I shouldn’t have done that! I should have known better, with Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley being on form! Hehe!

The legs looked a lot betterer this morning, though. The toenails were hurting every time I touched or moved on the mat. No shower, trying to save time.

As I was drying off, I caught sight of something I’d not noticed before. Brief History: Many years ago, when I had Duodenal Donald surgery, the hairs shaved off, on my chest and stomach, did not all return. Then, when I had the Aorta Valve replacement, there were very few that grew again. Then, after the stroke, what an oddity, they all fell out?

Now, I spotted two hairs on my chest, in the middle of the lower op scars, nearer the stomach, I think. One must have been about seven inches long? I wonder if they can do a transplant to my head? Hahaha!

Got redressed, and on the Amazon site, to check the tracker.

The delivery vehicle must be getting very close now.

I went to the kitchen window to see if I could spot a delivery van or lorry out there.

A van was parked in the Emergency Only bay (As do all vehicles). But it was not an Amazon vehicle.

Then, a grey car came up and turned at the dead end, and parked in the Emergency Vehicles Only parking bay. As I peered down at it, it was apparent that it was a Taxi or someone getting a lift with his shopping. It was my neighbour, Malcolm.

I took what I thought was three snaps. Below is what I found on the SD card when I came to download them. How did I do this? I was using the Canon SX 740 SH camera. I’m confused as to what I did wrong?

I’d spent a while taking these pictures, and panicked a bit when I realised. Had I missed a call on the Intercom? Then I realised that if anyone had arrived, I would have seen them. I’m losing it again!

I loitered around the flat hallway, so I could not miss it when someone rang the intercom. Ten minutes later, the box chimed out, and I pressed the listen button, but the machine went to a blue screen with the message ‘Hi’ on it? I pressed the admit button, but unsure if it had worked or not? I thought of going down, but what if I pass the chap on the way and end up missing him?

This was turning into another farcical day for me! I held my ground, and a chap arrived with the masks. Thanked him, and of off he shot. Leaving the covers near the door for me. Thank you!

I got the masks out to take a look—three in total, washable and reusable. I put them on the shelving for future use. When I am to be allowed out, is unknown, but at least when the time arrives, something like the Opticians, Pediatric Clinic, Dentist or Audio Clinic opens again, I’ll be alright for using the bus, at least. Of course, that is if I can live through and survive this isolationing. And put up with the agony from the uncut toenails, toothache, and mental anguish. Hahaha!

I made a brew and went to take a photograph of Marie’s, Koala Katie, and Pattie’s Scruffy, donated pets for me ♥, who I talk to each day, as they rest on top of the DVD shelves. But the Canon camera came up with this message as I returned the SD card. ‘Card cannot be accessed. Reinsert/change the card. Or format with this camera. Oh dearie me, what next is going to go wrong!

  • I took out the card and checked it was on the ‘Read’ position, which it was. I returned it to the camera, and still got the message.
  • I tried doing the same again. Same message!
  • I tried the other card in it, and that was alright.
  • Rechecked the Canon-card. Swapped it between open and closed, and put it back in. Same Message!
  • Removed it again, and was now out of ideas… It worked!

A sigh of relief was proffered forth.

Then I took a picture of my beloved pets and had a little chinwag with them.

Then I remembered the disappearing wristwatch. Surely it must be around the chair, I had it on last night, I think.

A long time ago, I wrote this view of the mysteriousness of the flat. Tim Price helped me. It’s grown over the months and is a little too long now, but I like it for a bit of fun and have used it a few times on the blog: 

“Ah, the mysterious wonders of Woodthorpe Court: The Ghosts, Hobgoblins, Boll-Weevils, Aliens, Gremlins, Karakia-cursing entities, hallucinations. Materialisations, poltergeist, lemures, wairuas, and kehuas. Manifestations that permeate, pass through the pores and interstices of space, through the time-continuum. Usually, without rupture or displacement within the building. To cause havoc, fear, and frustration, as they dislodge time itself, in their aspirations and skulduggery, to complete their given by Satan, ‘Let’s Piss-off Inchcock’ mission?” Well, now it’s getting more like a fact now, than fun! Hehehe!

Anyway, I had no luck with searching for the wet room and kitchen again for the watch.

My phagomaniac tendencies came into mind. And I returned to the food cupboards and fridge to ponder over what I fancied for my nosh.

Then I remembered the forgotten about Iceland order arriving twixt 15:00 to 17:00hrs. I decided to leave the meal until after the food arrived and I would make up my mind then. I’ll have a pot noodle, I can have if I get peckish… no, not a good idea! It will ruin anything I have later… Hello, I’m hesitating, equivocating, indecisive, vacillating, well, getting all muddled again! Decision-making and I were not meant to be a team after the Stroke.

I went on Facebooking then. I moved on to making-up a template for tomorrow. Got them all done, and…

Gluglegnatsworth!  I got out of the swivel chair to go and make another brew, lost my balance, and toppled forward,  dropped the China mug putting my hand out to break the fall,  landed on the recliner. As I came to rest, I found the missing wristwatch on the tray on the Ottoman as I dispersed the contents!

Unbelievable! This was the first place I looked for the timepiece as well, and did so again at least two more times during the day!

The painful fall, and even more hurtful getting back up my bulky, but flobby-body back on my feet, was somehow not as bad as it should have been! The delight in finding it was tempered by my confusion as to how I failed to see it in my earlier searches. Confusion Conrad was rampant and befuddling! And my confidence was at a low ebb!

I took some waste bags to the chute. Then a couple of recycling bags down to the caretaker’s room.

Doing the blog back up again, forgetting all about the tea I was going to make, I got on with updating this blog again. Warden and desk-top-dancer, Hauptbereitschaftsleiteress, Deana called, to check on things. I explained about my having to remain in isolation until the Doctor phones to let me know when I can be freed. Haha! Everything was fine, though. Little things like this, are appreciated, and supportive of my retaining my mental health. (Well?)

Back to the blogging and a message came in from Iceland. They are ahead of schedule and should arrive between 15:00hrs and 16:15 hours.

Life in one’s dotage, I always thought, would be slower, and much more hassle-free. Humph!

Dizzy Dennis, Saccades Sandra and Shaking Shaun all came on at the same time, and this was worrying. Yet, within around five minutes, they’d all left, leaving me with a cracking headache!

Iceland’s delivery man arrived. Thanked him and slipped him a G & T to him in thanks, and got the bags from the doorway into the kitchen.

Still a bit of a mystery as to how, when or why I made this order? But it had all the usual sort of stuff I have in it. I hope I hadn’t had a ‘Blank Moment’. Nott that I can say anything specific about these lapses, but, usually, I find out what I’d done, but no iota of any knowledge of this one, if it was one… I’ll stop mentioning it here, I’m confusing myself more than ever.

I got the goods stored away. There was a tray of frozen Chinese belly pork, the only thing different to usual. So I had that for the evening nosh. I’m worried that the cupboards may fall off of the walls! Haha!

The nosh was prepared and served up. A bit of a palatable feast as it turned out.

The Chinese belly pork, I cooked adding some Hickory. The last of the sourdough muffins, buttered and filled with off-cuts of smoked ham. A Marmite cheese disc, onions, beetroot, gherkins, and tomatoes. A lemon yoghourt, and a lovely crispy, South African apple to follow. My sitomania was well satiated this time. Gave this meal a Flavour-Rating of 7.8/10.

Incidentally, I found myself forever looking at my charity shop-bought, £2 wristwatch throughout the meal. I slept with it on tonight, fearing it may hide away from me overnight, again. Hehehe! 

Oddly, Sweet Morpheus was not interested. I put the TV on, it was a load of hogwash showing, yet still, I didn’t nod off?

When it did arrive, it was filled with pestering dreams. Colin Cramps was waking me up, and I think that each time I nodded off again, I rejoined the same, or similar dream?

Hey-Ho!

Inchcockski – Tuesday 9th June 2020: Busy, up-to-the-neck in it day!

Tuesday 9th June 2020

Afrikaans: Dinsdag 9 Junie 2020

01:45hrs: I came back to imitation life, and my mind filled with the memories of last night’s unfortunate, to say the least, Whoopsiedangleplop in the kitchen, when the bar on top of the cabinets came down, making a terrible mess, that I basically left unsorted, and needs tending to today.

This prompted my making plans on the duties that lay ahead for me. The Iceland delivery is coming, along with my beloved Hristina, my phlebotomy nurse in the same time-period; twixt 09:00 > 11:00hrs. I need to at least get yesterdays blog finished and posted first. Then make a start on this one. Do my ablutions. Get the mess in the kitchen sorted out, and the kitchen floor mopped up.

So, I got out of the £300, second-hand, c1968 recliner; niftily I might add, and off to the EOGPB (Emergency-Overnight-Grey-Plastic-Bucket) for an EBSC (Energetic-But-Short-Painless-Cloudy) wee-wee.

Then to the kitchen to get the kettle on and do the medicationalising as needed. The pins looked in rude health, although still looking a little aenemic. The leg ulcer had almost disappeared, but there was some itching coming from it.

The sphygmomanometer revealed that the Sys had gone up again. Could be the excitement of seeing my Vampire Nurse again? But most likely at the thought of all the cleaning and sorting of the kitchen collapse is likely. Grobognangles!

I got on with the updating of the Monday blog. Pressed on persistently and eventually got it all done and posted off. (This took me around two hours to do!) During which, a stomach ache came on? It might have been Duodenal Donald getting ready to kick-off, but I’m not sure. Finally finished it and posted it off. Emailed the link, Pinterested some piccies. Then onto Facebooking.

Time to get the ablutions sorted, then the kitchen to sort out. Oh, also the handwashing to be tackled. Oh, dearie me!

Well, it’s a long time since I’ve actually walked into the door frame! Shuddering Shoulder Shirley was not pleased, at all! At least it was the right blade, and with Nicodemus’sNeuroitransmitters on strike at the time, there was not much pain.

But, Shirley seemed to kick-off the instant I collided with the door, which meant I dropped and broke one of the Jenny-donated mugs which I as taking to wash! Cragknackles! Then, bending down to pick up the pieces, Back-Pain-Brenda joined in as well, she was nasty with it! But, a Silver-Lining-Search, told me I had been doing extremely well ailment wise over the last 24hrs, so I should only expect things like this to happen. Fair enough! Gragnattles! Also, it was handily timed, so I could apply some Phorpain Gel after the ablutioning! Again, Fair enough!

Just as I was about to start cleaning the teeth, and the need for the Porcelain Throne put in an appearance. Good timing again, there I was a limp-and-a-half away from the Throne at the time! And apart from being a little messy and Khari in colour, the ensuing evacuation was almost perfect. Yes, I know, a welcome shock it was! And no bleeding! Smug-Mode-Assumed!

Washed the dandies, and then searched for some teeth to clean. (Haha! Not many left now! A bit of bleeding where I got a tad over-zealous on the back lower teeth. Ah, the shaving next! Fully aware of the likelihood of Shuddering-Shoulder Shirley causing a slash or to, instead of using both hands and two razors as usually would, I tried shaving with just the left hand. But this seemed to set Anne Gyna off? How? Why? So, I reverted, carefully to my usual method.

There were a few nicks, but nothing extreme at all. And they did not bleed much either. I reckon the INR Warfarin level must be well low. With waiting for three weeks for a blood test, it’ll be interesting to see the results of today’s test.

A stand-up all over wash (Too early to use the shower and disturb my unseen for months neighbours) The pins (legs) were looking better than they have for ages. However, the legs did look exsanguinated in the extreme, which was a smidge worrying!

Then I medicated the bodily areas in need of the same. Haemorrhoid Harold’s crevice was Germaloid creamed. Arthur Itis’s knees were Phorpain gelled. Little Inchies fungal lesion, well, as usual, I gritted my few teeth and rubbed in some Corticosteroid cream Argh! Olive-oiled the ear-holes. Applied some tincture to a couple of bothersome teeth. No Saccades Sandra spray left. I’ll see if I can get in touch with the chemist tomorrow, then see if Deana can help with arranging to have it collected for me, along with the prescriptions.

I rang Jenny to tell her that when the milk arrives, I’ll ring her, and bring it down to her. But bless her, she having none of that, and insisted she would come up to collect and pay for them. She’s not a lady to argue with! I wish she’d adopt me, though!

Then I hobbled to the waste chute with two small bags. I was walking, well, stumbling decently enough, but the feet and toes were rather painful.

Back to the flat, and got the handwashing sorted out. I got the zip-up jumper above the heated cloths air ion the hallway to catch the rising heat. (Cunning, eh? Hehe!) I’ve now one drying, another cleaned, and the one I’m wearing and dirtying. Hahaha!

Then, I washed through the yarmulke, and craftily put it on a bend in the airer, and kept turning it every now and then, to help it dry quicker. (I’m not daft yer know! Alright, fair enough, I am!)

I got the towel drying on the flat airer in the front junk-room.

Somehow or other, I attained some zeal,   resolution, and pertinacity, and set about, limpingly, I admit, to get the kitchen floor cleaned!

Worra struggle and pain it was too! Cleaning of the floor, I knocked stuff over, dropped and lost things, cut my finger, banged my head on the cupboard door, broke the mop, banged my knee on the step ladders, and generally had a terrible time of it. Tsk!

But still, my determination prevailed. And finally, at last, I got the job completed. With little, if any, self-satisfaction, I’m afraid. I’d made such an absurd and frustrating accident-prone mess of it!

I got the kettle on, and the cobs and cooked beef out to make the beef sarnies, and heard the sound of the yap-yap dog, so I looked outside, and there was a group of dog walkers, all maintaining a proper social distance from each other, while their dogs had the time of their lives.

The lovely little black yap-yapper never stopped wagging its tail. The other two black dogs were playing with the bigger brown woof-woof. I got such enjoyment out of just watching them, it cheered me up a smidge.

I took another photographicalisation from the balcony, of the end of Chestnut Walk. The red cars were back.

Fellow blogger Bill, from the US of A, told me he doesn’t see many red cars over there. Looking at the top overall popular colours in the U.S., for all vehicle categories, White – 19.3%, Silver – 18%, and Black – 12.4%. The UK, it’s White – 414,403, Blue – 373,728 and Red – 226,501. Not earth-shattering, but interesting? 

The Intercom flashed and much to my delight, it was Hristina, the gorgeous, sweet-natured phlebotomy nurse come to take my blood. She was soon up in the flat. Having not seen any nurse for three weeks, and it being two-months that I’ve not seen Hristina, I was a tad disappointed in her being too busy for a proper chinwag. But, she still chatted while she took the blood, bless her! I could see she was pent up a smidge. She told me of how long she’d searched for a parking space, and had to park on double yellow lines and left a note on her windscreen saying she would be back in ten minutes. Poor thing. But the lift seeing her gave me, was most appreciated. 

I got Computer Cameron back on, and the intercom sounded. It was Iceland’s delivery arriving.

The chap was soon at the door and left the bags in the hall for me.

I got the carriers into the kitchen and sorted the skimmed milk into two bags to spread the weight for Jenny. Left them outside the door and telephoned her to tell her they had arrived. She again she insisted I do not take them to her, and she came up to collect them Bless her little cotton socks!

Ah, I’ve meant to look up the origin of this phrase for ages, and I finally did it! My Dad used to use it. Not to me, I might add! Hahaha!

Here’s Google’s first answer: It comes not from the cotton material, but from George Edward Lynch Cotton. In 1858 as Bishop of Calcutta, Mr Cotton created schools for Eurasian children. As part of his philanthropy, he ordered dozens of pairs of socks to be sent over for the children, blessing them on arrival.

Second one: “Bless their little cotton socks!“: Used to express your affection for somebody because of something they have said or done. Now we know! Hehe!

Jenny came up and pressed the bells, collected the milk and nipped off after she’d put the payment in an envelope through the door. “Bless Her Cotton Socks!” All sorted.

As I was making up three beef rolls to have later, perhaps with a few oven-chips, the mind went off on one of its lucubrations. Not a Thought-Storm as such, because somehow I was ignoring the mind-musing and getting on with making the cobs. That came out wrong, I think? I put the cobs in a cool spot to keep until I have time to eat. Not the fridge, though, cause of Toothache Thomas.

Back on the computer again, and the ‘I only want to be with you’ tune of the door bells chimed up again. Heart-stopper, ILC, and Warden Obergruppenführeress Deana came in, to test the wristlet alarm with the control room. Another busy gal! But while I had the chance, I had to ask her to help with the medications, to find out about the prescriptions for me I only have three days meds left, and if necessary, to arrange collection for me. She said she’d find out and ring me later. I’d be lost without help on the phone, thanks, Deana!

Back on the computer. Not got much done, a bit busy even for me today.

I went on CorelDraw, and guess what? Pee’d off now! I decided as it was late anyway, to turn things off, and got on with the snack. I decided (Yes, sometimes I can make my mind up! Usually, with an erroneous, wrong, incorrect, and much altered and changed outcome. Tsk! 

I made three of Big Baps up with butter and roast beef slices. Marmite flavoured cheese, tomatoes, fries and an apple pie. Taste rating result: 4/10, shame! The cobs were dry and bland, the Algerian tomatoes bitter and foul, and the apple pie all sugar, no fruit. But the Marmite cheese and fries were tasty.

Washed the pots, took the medications, and got down in c1968 recliner, to watch a football match from Euro 2016. Can’t remember at the moment who was playing, cause I fell asleep before it started.

Woke up four hours later, thinking it was morning, and got up. I should have known really, cause there were no demands for a wee-wee or the Porcelain Throne!

I decided to stay up anyway. I had a bash at trying to get the ankle-support strap on. No chance!

So I got this blog updated and sent off, then on Facebooking.

Taketh care folks!

Inchcocksi: Tuesday 18th February 2020: Stuck indoors day again! Blumphumerations!

2020 Feb 18

2020 tttFeb18

Tuesday 18th February 2020

Bulgarian: Вторник, 18 февруари 2020 г.

00 Feb 18

01:45hrs: I stirred, wriggled and stretched the body a little, to test out the ailments that were on duty this morning, and had a blank moment or two, while I waited for the brain to catch up with me. Back-Pain Brenda and Anne Gyna let themselves be known first. Terence Toothache was not as bad as he had been.

When I eventually tackled extracting the Mr Blobby body from the £300, second-hand recliner and rose to my feet, caught my balance and grabbed the stick, Arthur Itis joined in the ‘Lets-Give-Inchcock-Some-Pain’ regiment! But he was not in a foul mood, but I still could have done without his input!

As I was making my way, nice and steadily hobbling to the wet room for a wee-wee, the arrival of the morning summoning to the Porcelain Throne caused me to increase speed a little. I needn’t have bothered rushing. Another marathon sit-and-wait session. I pondered on whether or not to take a Senna later, had a go at the crosswording, picked my nose, and lethargically pondered on my past errors and failures…

WDP 1Lda

wd 60.25.0 2 Then, a sign of movement! I tensed and tentatively waited for the pain to start… Sure enough, it did! Slowly as progress was very slowly made, the pain increased. The relief when things that had no control from me, finally ended, with a loud, splashing kerplunk, was blessed! I almost felt the need to check if my torso had been split in half! Hehehe! On the bright side, it was not messy, and there was no bleeding at all! But the agony!

Washed and off to the kitchen, where the loathsome susurration-like ‘Hum’ was worse than ever!

WDP 1R2Tue01wd 60.25.0 2 I got the kettle on, took the medications, made the brew and an involuntary Neuropathic Schuhplattler drop-something and flail-about dance emanated from the right leg. It was a good un! But, with the aid of the four-pronged walking stick and clinging to the cooker, I managed to stay upright! A few minutes later, it was as if nothing had happened. I did clout my ankle against the cupboard during the cross between the hokey-cokey and an ice-skating routine. While the leg flailed to its heart’s content.

wd 60.25.0 2 I’ve not suffered one of these for a while, and I am not too keen on doing so again! But no histrionics, the Mary Potter Treatment Centre Doctor, told me I will have to cope with the Peripheral Neuropathy, cause they can do nothing to cure it, dying nerve-ends cannot be mended. But they can help me with dealing with it. (That was ten months ago, I’m still waiting for the promised follow-up appointment!) Ah, well! So be it, it is what it is, that’s how the cookie crumbled, c’est la vie, and a part of my natural, normal, disaster-prone life, fortune and luck. Yuppity, Amen!

I moved yesterday’s handwashing onto the airers.

2Tue11

Then tackled the updating of the Monday blog. Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters in the fingers were doing better now, and this, along with my doing a lot of downloading last night, helped me complete the blog in short time.

WDP 1L wd 60.25.0 2 Out of the blue, the need for a Porcelain Throne, Mark 2 suddenly presented itself. It only seemed like a few minutes since the first one (that was because the pain still lingered from it, I suppose!) Off hastily as I could manage to the wet room. Relly cut it fine, and this time the movement started as I got on the Throne! Totally out of my control again. The evacuation ground its way out, but a lot quicker this time. And the blood flowed with it. Gruelling-Gromble-Garblisations!

Still, I was in much better shape afterwards, this time. A cleaning and medicalisationing session, and back to the blogging. Which was soon finished and posted off. I went on the WordPress Reader, then Facebooking.

I think that Nurse Christina should be coming today. And I have a Morrison order due twixt 06;00 > 07:00hrs, so the ablutions will have to be tended to next.

2Tue12Well, the ablutionalisationing session went surprisingly well, up to when I was drying off and started the medicating. Dropsies, wait for it… three! Yee-ha! The razors I bought from the pound shop worked well enough. All in all, up to here, a grand even enjoyable scrub-up! I put the wrong (short) socks on, but with the battle of the sock-glide going so well, I didn’t risk changing into the new long ones. Oh, no!

WDP 13Lwd 60.25.0 2 I suppose I was overconfident with the other things going so well, cause I applied the Daktacort antifungal miconazole nitrate) corticosteroid hydrocortisone cream – that should be used for Little Inchies fungal lesion, to Harold’s Haemorrhoids! The best I can say, is it stung a lot more than usual, and this is when I realised what I’d done! A minor panic-flap took place, as I did my bestest to get it back out and off! I managed it though, but it gave a new meaning to the words ‘Hot Pants!’ Snortle, Chuckle, Snigger!

I made a brew of the Glenghettie Gold tea. The ‘Hum’ ever-present, the toothache still not too bad at all. It was very worrying!

wd 60.25.0 2 I took four photographs of roughly the same view from the unwanted, dangerous, light & view-blocking thick-framed kitchen window. I took each one in a different setting. But, being the Morosoph I am, by the time I got to put the photos on here, I’d completely forgotten which were which. I used, Auto, Night Landscape, Landscape and Aperture Priority, which sorting out which was which, was beyond me. (Al indeed, a lot of things are nowadays!)

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2Tue13I about to make a start on a page-top graphic on CorelDraw and changed my mind. (Fancy that!)

I got the handwashing done, wrung and hung instead! Made the usual bit of a mess with spilling the water again. Thanks to Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters, failing me. I wondered at this time if the dying nerve ends are helping 2Tue14me to cope more easily with this toothache?

Back on the computer, and the intercom rang out! It was my Morrison delivery. The pleasant chap put the bags into the hallway for me, I took them through to the kitchen one at a time. Better safe than sorry!

2Tue15wd 60.25.0 2 A big order this one was. I put away the few tins packet and washing things, and unloaded the fresh food onto the counter so that I could check them out for dates and staleness. I’m uncertain whether I actually meant to order all this stuff. Two bottles of milk? Three ready-made Chicken Risotto meals? Although, later they were found to be 50p less each if I bought three of them. The dirty-great size of the three Spare Rib pot noodles was a bargain – 50p each! I’d overdone the desserts too! But Josie is always prepared to help me out and eat some. Haha! Looks like the risotto for tonight, I can try using the rice cooker and make some extra to top it up, that is if I can find the instruction booklet.

wd 60.25.0 2 The drilling, knocking and buzzing from the Fire Sprinkler lads in the hallway, has at least taken my thoughts away from the blasted ‘Hum.’

wd 60.25.0 2 I made a brew and started on the CorelDraw creating at last. Minutes into it, and the intercom chimed and lit-up again. It was the male phlebotomy nurse, come to take my blood for the Warfarin INR testing. He was a serious young man. I told him about and showed him the picture that Tim Hancock had sent for me of her. I mentioned how kind it was of him, and the brilliant idea of using it in a solid frame! The lad showed some interest in the frame too. But, not enough to crack a smile, I failed in that mission. He got the blood taken professionally, and was soon off to his next patient.

I moped for a while, about not getting Christina. But I had the photo to look at! Thanks, Tim!

I updated this blog, then made another mug of tea, Thompsons Punjana this time.

I spent hours and hours and hours… well a very long time, trying to get some graphicalisationing done. But it was a laborious heuristic job, with the Nicodemus Neurotransmitters failing so often, thus creating more errors than Saccades-Sandra was doing, and she was making plenty, I can tell yers. A slightly depressed and frustrated mode adopted. 

2Tue30Eventually, tired and brain-drained, I got the nosh prepared. I did some white Patna rice, and some ‘quick-cook BBQ flavoured as the white rice cooking came to an end, I added some Hoisin sauce to that one. The cardboard pieces, oh, no… I mean chicken pieces were the most tasteless I’ve ever had. But the rice and risotto was excellent tasting. As were the small tomatoes, lemon curd yoghourt, and the Milk Roll bread. Flavour rating: 7.5/10.

Just in case the delivery arrived, I stayed up late doing some graphics. Well, I say doing them, not many got done. It was so frustrating, I gave up, and found some TV programs with subtitles on to watch. Law & Order had two consecutive episodes on channel 21.

wd 60.25.0 2 This way I could watch without using the headphones, which would have prevented me from hearing the door chimes or intercom when the delivery arrives, which it didn’t, of course.

wd 60.25.0 2 I nodded-off and woke before midnight. Went to see if any notes had been put through the door form any missed delivery personage. Nope! 

I made my way to the GPWWB (Grey-Plastic-Wee-Wee-Bucket) for an SSP (Short-Sharp-Painful) style -Wee-wee. I decided to stay up, and got the kettle on.

Worra life!

Inchcock Today – Monday 17th February 2020: Clopidogrel side-effects on the pins (legs)!

2020 Feb 17

2020 tttFeb17

Monday 17th February 2020

Zulu: UMsombuluko 17 ngoFebhuwari 2020

00 Feb 17

WD 0.30.0B 01:05hrs: I woke to the sounds of the blowing winds, rain hitting the windows. And I could still hear the flipping ‘Hum’ from the inside at the same time! Oy-oy-oy! A wee-wee was needed, and it was growing more urgent second by second. The battle to get out of the second-hand, £300, c1968 recliner, was a struggle. During which it came to light that Back-Pain-Brenda and Anne Gyna were both going to be a hassle today. But thankfully, Arthur Itis seemed a lot easier on the knees! The toothache appears to have eased off a tad? I’m not complaining about that!

I grabbed the stick and utilised the GPWWB (Grey-Plastic-Wee-Wee-Bucket). It proved to be of the SSP (Short-Sharp-Painful) style. But with a high degree of splashback. Off to the wet room for a hand wash. I tried for a Porcelain Throne visit while in there, but no luck.

WDP 09aLWD 0.30.0B Off to the kitchen, where I was flabbergasted to find the cupboard doors open, and the medical drawers pulled out. With various bits and pieces of cutlery and pottery in different places than normal? What’s been going on here! I looked around at the disorganised mess, and for the life of me, couldn’t remember, understand or work-out what had happened! Ah, nocturnal meanderings perhaps? Baffled completely now! To a certain extent, I managed to ostracise my worries and concerns from my mind, which was a rarity indeed, an aberration, a deviation from normality and ordinariness in itself! Inwardly, my EQ gave me a smirk?

WD 0.30.0B I got the camera to take a picture of the state of the place, and diverted to take a shot of my extraordinarily, ever-morphing legs!

Gone was the colouring of yesterday, 7Sun07the cadaverousness-bloodlessness had returned. With a few extra lumps, clumps and blood-papule growths more prominent today. The legs were of a different size to each other. The worrying signs of cramps around the shin area… but why can I not recall having any pains during the night? I pondered on trying to understand the when what and why for’s. Why should I go through the cupboards and draw, leave the mall open, and get my head down again? My IQ interrupted, with a sort of; “Forget it, at least whatever happened, you got through it uninjured!” He rounded off his statement with snide-snigger! Which made sense to me. 

WDP 003aWD 0.30.0B I took my medications, made a mug of tea, and had to shoot off back to the wet room, which was done with ease, to use the Porcelain Throne. Argh! Squawk, caterwauling and ululations! Talk about pain! What in hell had I just passed? I wonder if I might have eaten a saucepan in my nocturnal wanderings! Hehehe!

WDPH01L4