Advice on Hospitalisationing, for my Xyrophobia suffering, over amour propred Brother-in-law Pete. Hehehe!

Pondering over the experiences of my Hospitalisations

With the hopes of giving my Bother-in-law Pete, a lift and laugh, while he’s in the Cty Nottingham Hospital, being spoilt by the specialists and pretty nurses!

My Medical Memories recalled and relived:

At the age of five, I got my thumb end chopped off and was taken by ambulance to the Nottingham Children’s Hospital. Put on a trolley, and got told-off for falling off of it! Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

When I got shot (Working in Security in those days), they left me on a trolley in a passage and forgot about me for four-hours! General Hospital. Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

When I had my ulcer done, they forgot to give me the chrystals, and I spent six hours on the Throne when I got home, in agony! City Hospital. Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

When I got the hernia and was rushed into the QMC, Jane helped out my bringing things for me. Then, while repairing the hernia (Genuine bit of good luck here!), they found cancer in the bladder! Fortunately, they already had the laser and camera down my penis to deal with the rupture, so they set to and lasered the prostate cancer, at the same time! Serendipitous indeed! Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

On a new-years Eve, I collapsed with high or low BP, can’t remember which now. Paramedics took me in, I fell off of the gurney going in, and lay there on the concrete floor for several minutes. QMC Hospital. Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

I was told I could not be sent home with my BP so high or low, and the Warfarin level so low. I was placed in a corridor, with many other patients on trolleys, to await a bed coming free! QMC Hospital. Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

Where, three hours later, I was told there is no chance of a bed, and I will have to go home! This being 00:30hrs on New Year’s day, so no buses! QMC Hospital. Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

I had to walk, well hobble, all the way home in the early hours of the morning. No money for a bus or taxi, not that it mattered, I saw neither on my marathon walk back to the flats. QMC Hospital. Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

When I was having the angiogram, before the heart operation, they said it would be a three-day job. Then, a day later in the morning at about 04:00hrs, they woke me to tell me the bed was needed urgently, and I will have to go home! City Hospital. Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

Mind you; it was Pete who saved the day, at this ungodly hour, they rang Pete, who had to come and collect me! City Hospital. As we were leaving, they handed Pete a leaflet on what happens during an angiogram, which I’d had days ago? Has this ever happen to Pete? No! 

In the Morris Ward for the aorta valve replacement. A seven-day job with recovery they said (Huh!) By the fourth day, they were calling Brother-in-Law Pete to collect me again! City Hospital. Saved the day again!

Peripheral Neuropathy diagnosed. I was summoned to the hospital. A struggle in getting there, but I made it in time. I waited for three hours after the appointment time, then got in to see the Specialist. Who said, “There is nothing we can do, your neurotransmitters are dying on your right side. We cannot repair nerve ends.” Then gave me four-A4 sheets that listed the problems I could expect. Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

Then the most embarrassing event of my life, the Stroke. Everything in the body and I do mean everything that could leak, leaked, and I crumpled to the floor, puzzled, confused, and expecting the end had come. Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

Pressed the Alert Alarm, no idea what the lady said at the Nottingham City Control Room, or what I said to her. Or if I was speaking or thinking? While waiting for help, she rang back, insisting I unlock the front door to allow the Paramedics to gain entry. I had to crawl on all fours, no chance of me standing up, even while crawling, I kept falling over to my right side. There I was, in a right smelly mess, covered in front and rear releases, tears flowing, the nose running, the right ear bleeding and blood pouring from the fungal lesion, the Paramedics were shouting something through the door, and eventually I got to open the door, then collapsed again! These details were told me later. Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

To the QMC Hospital, parked on the trolley in a dark room for hours. (Or so it seemed to me anyway). Up to a treatment room. I lay on the trolley in a bay for hours and started to come round a bit. A chap came to me later, told me I’d had a stroke, and said they would be transferring me to the Stroke Ward at the City Hospital. QMC Hospital. Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

An hour or so later, I was collected and taken to the City Hospital. The journey was exciting, as I learned a lot about the two ambulance women who were taking me and other patients crammed in the ambulance. Their eating habits, one preferred Morrison’s the other Tesco. About their child birthing experiences. Coronation Street, and Neighbours were spoken of, and one of them was having Chilli-con-carne for dinner. Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

Got into the Newall Stroke Ward. Jane and Pete visited a few days later. I got a window bed, but no camera to use. So Pete took this photo on his visit a few days later. Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

I was in for fourteen days, started the therapy three times a day. Then it happened again! I was told they needed the bed for an urgent admission, and I would be moved to a Residential Home (The Acorn)! Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

The ambulance ladies who collected me left much of my possessions behind and took some that belonged to the patient in the next bed! I learned on the journey, gruesome details of one of the ambulance lady’s Cesarian operation, and that the other was going in for a breast reduction that months end! Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

During my weeks there, I had my eyes opened. I had to make a police witness report and went for two days without being given an evening meal. But I loved it there. Has this ever happen to Pete? No! But he did take this photo when he visited me to check on my finances.

The photo shows a bottle of pop and a book that had yet to be returned to the rightful owner, taken there by the ambulance drivers in their rush to get me out of the hospital. They also failed to take my underwear, socks and Crossword books! Has this ever happen to Pete? No! 

Then, the room was needed urgently, so for the third time, I was moved. Again they called on Jane & Pete to lift me home. Has this ever happen to Pete? No! Hehehe! I’d have been lost without him and Jane, though! They listed and took all of my valuables while I was away for safe-keeping, Bless him. I’ll get them back one day!

Sister Jane came to sort out my medications that were in a right state after months away. A good job too! Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

I was given a carer to help me dress and put on the ankle strap, which was greatly appreciated I can tell yers!

But they were cancelled as the head-honcho woman, decided I could do it myself. Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

The After-Stroke nurses came regularly, and again were very much a boon to me! They stopped coming when they arranged months of one a week two-hour physio training for me. It nearly crippled me! Haha!

Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

The now dreaded Sock-Gide was delivered, and the blood-blisters and bruised flourished. Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

Now, I cannot put any bamboo or other type of socks on at all, because of the uncut toenails and failure to bleed the ankle ulcer. It’s too painful to use the deadly vicious Sock-Glide at all! Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

I’m waiting for the medical departments etc. to reopen again after the appalling Coronavirus interlude. I will need, the Dentist (badly), the podiatrist (Desperately), The audio clinic for hearing aid batteries, and Opticians to get some glasses I can see through! Also, the delayed appointment with the cardiac team, to have a check on the metal ticker! Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

Now I’ve been diagnosed as diabetic! Has this ever happen to Pete? No!

Pete knows the reason for this post.

To keep his spirits up with a laugh!

All the best, mate! 

I hope Jane’s coping too!


Inchcock – Sat 1st Dec 2018: Not one of my better days. Hey-Ho!



Saturday 1st December 2018

Somali: Sabtida 1da December 2018

wd 0.0.255 23:55hrs: I bestirred without the brain engaged I think. I sensed a reluctance to be activated from the grey-cells. Contentment for everything to end. I must be getting tired of losing the fight against depression, fears, and worries.

Slowly the mind cranked its starting-handle, and I noticed the empty plate and tray from the nosh, lying half-on, half-off of the easy chair next to the £300 second-hand recliner. On which I was laid out, in the exact same position as I fell asleep! TV remote control snuggled between my massive flobby torso and the arm of the chair, and a pen and pad (unused) in the fold of flesh created between my chest the bulbous wobbly bloated stomach.

The thoughts kicked in, and instantly, I began to feel all chastened, timid, vulnerable, and apprehensive at the same time. Trying to find a reason or cause for this, was of course impossible. My decaying ageing brain was floundering. Tsk!

The moment I attempted to physically move my oversized Falstaffian body, with its avoirdupois stomach attached, the need for the Porcelain Throne arrived at grease-lightning speed. Off to the wet room. The solidness and unwillingness of the evacuation enabled me the time to enjoy reading a few pages of the Clarkson biography book. On the bright side, the Fungal Lesion was not bleeding on this occasion. Good! Washed and anticepticated the hands and contact points, taps, handles, etc. and off to the kitchen to fo the Health Checks.


6Sat04Apart from the weight, all the other readings were down on yesterdays first Health Checks. The temperature was down a fair bit. Good or bad things? I don’t know. Tsk!

I got the kettle on and had to nip back to the wet room for an SSWW (Sort-Sharp-Wee-Wee) As I carried out this function, I only saw one of the EIBWBBBs (Evil Ironclad Boll-Weevil black biting beetles). Ah, might they be on the wane at last? Or are they up to their battleground chicanery and subterfuge tactics again?

6Sat02The view from the kitchen window again inspired me. So I used this scenic early morning photographicalisation for a little witty-ditty for the top of this page.

It was colder than it looked when I opened the window. Spitting a bit of rain as well. I bet that will get in through the gaps between the glass on the balcony.

I got the Friday diary updated and posted off to WordPress. Then went on the WP Reader.

I got this post started off, in between a few more SSWWs. Tsk!

Went onto Facebooking to update the picture albums.

Got the ablutions tended to.

Dec01cI made a start on the Willmott Brown Funny Doctored Graphic post. The latest ones created and added them in the Willmott Brown album on my Facebook page, and a post in WordPress.

wd 0.0.255 Another cock-up with the Excel Personal Diary that I tried to correct. But after hours of trying to, I had to give up again. Deleted it entirely and worked on an older on to update it. Twelve hours gone of my day already and not much achieved.

I hate weekends!

6Sat23Decided to get the nosh prepared, got the mushrooms and Anya potatoes out of the crockpot, ham, dried roast onions, tomatoes, balsamic vinegar beetroots, apple and Limoncello on the tray, and it happened again. The telephone burst into life!

wd 0.0.255 It was Brother-in-law Pete, he showed concern that I had not sent him the link to yesterdays Inchcock Today. I checked while I was nattering with him, and sure enough, I realised I had not! I felt a little confused as to how I forgot to do this. We chattered a while, I thanked him for letting me know and his concern, and got on with sending the link off.

wd 0.0.255 Which, unfortunately, was when Dizzy Dennis and Shaking Shaun attacked.

In the morning, when I came to create this blog, I fear from this point on, the memory was very scarce, No scribbled notes found, like usual. So, I’m not sure what happened next, but I do recall Little Inchies Fungal Lesion bleeding, and I think I must have gone over or knocked into something, cause I woke up in the night with a lump on my head, but only a little one. Hehe! Tsk!

A Photographic Visit to see Old pussies Fooey, Albert, Sister Jane and Hubby Pete (Jane’s hubby, not mine! Hehe!)

Fooey consuming his fodder

Fooey having consumed his nosh!

Fooey with that “Anymore please” look. Bless him!

Jane and Pete trying to get Fooey to pose!

Jane, looking good, picking her figs, drink in hand!

Albert, unimpressed with being a photographic model!


Albert threatening the birds – and Humans! Hehe!

Wish someone had told me the hen was a fake. Hehe!

The old pensioner caught Tree-Hugging again!

Inchcock Today – Thursday 1st December 2016: Winwood Tenants Social Hour – Made it today.


Thursday 1st December 2016

Burmese: ကြာသပတေးနေ့ 1st, ဒီဇင်ဘာလ 2016

Up and out of the £300 second-hand recliner chair by 0145hrs. Laundry already in the bags waiting, got the coins, dressed and down to the laundry room. Got the machine going and back upstairs for a WRHD session – Oh, boy what a session too! Rock hard and the blood flowed into the bowl creating a scene worthy  of the Bates Motel. Took an extra Senna that I’d added to the pill box with the other medications. Made a cuppa and realised it was time to go down to the washroom with the other bag of washing, get that going and move the first one into the dryer.

4thur034thr04Another naughty personage had failed to clean out the filter… Again!


I found some clothes left in the dryer, they were from a lady, so maybe it was one of the old dears who couldn’t get down to clean the filter, and I felt better about it, less annoyed.

Got the new wash started and the first lot into the dryer.

Back up again to the apartment.

Got the kitchen wiped up where I’d left the tap running and splashing water all over.

(I am a fool!) I’ll have another bag of washing ready to do by the morning.

4thur05Down again to collect the first dried load, back up, and put the togs away, then a final trip back down to wait for the other dryer to finish its cycle.

Gone 0500hrs by now. I nipped out of the foyer doors, no frost about but it was still cold. I soon got myself back indoors and into the laundry room.

Collected the other washing. Took this 4thur06 4thur07 4thur08to number 72 and stored everything away in a semi-ordered fashion.

Checked the temperature on the kitchen window thermometer, 58°f. The radiator that was ‘mended’ yesterday is still not working. Outside it had gone up to 39°f

Back on the computer and updated the diaries. Made another brew and drank this one.

Graphicalising, WordPressing and Facebooking followed.

Brother in law Pete emailed these Fooey photographicalisations of him in their yard/garden.

Say’s he was testing the water.


Looks like he wasn’t too keen on the flavour or taste of it in the third photograph?

Bless his cotton socks, I love this cat to bits. Sister Jane is always having to sort out his matted fur every day, but it’s a labour of love.

Did the ablutions with lemon soap and citrus deodorant to follow.

Visited Olive’s flat, but no answer.

Off to the Tenants Social Meeting. Not many folks there this morning. BJ arrived earlier than his usual. Eddie only had a few minutes stay, but won five raffle prizes and shot off for his doctor appointment.

4thur09Deana called in and I discovered that Toni was in a temporary home being looked after. With missing the last meeting due to the Amazon delivery cock-up and the fall, I found out that some of the clan had visited Toni in the new care home she was in. I felt so depressed and sad that someone hadn’t told me about this, and I sulked for a few minutes.put

I’d have loved to have gone with them to see her.

4thur10BJ decided he wanted the laptop I’d offered for his other half. I fetched it for him and he lifted me into Arnold, dropping me off on the high street, bless him.

Called in Fulton Foods store, then into Asda and got some things. Got some Fresh Cream French Horns, two packs of two, one for 92-year-old Norman who lives next door to Olive, cause he’s not been very well andI know he likes them. While shopping I sensed the warm wet sensation from the lower regions. Decided to make my way home to investigate things.

Got the bus back without any hiatus. Actually met Norman in the foyer as I entered the flats, and gave him the cream cakes, this seemed to cheer him up a bit. I had to leave him and was soon in the wetroom checking things out in the lower regions. Oh dear, Little Inchy’s lesion had been bleeding away again. Cleaned around and then I put on some Daktacort cream, very tender job.

4thur11Got the meal cooking.

Used the last disappointing Twist thing with a nice mixture of dried beetroot, apple, tomato, pickled beetroots, pea-rice, Roast parsnips and sweet potato slices, baked potatoes and chestnuts.

I couldn’t eat it all, but I made a serious dent in it. Hehe!

The Fresh Cream French Horns afterwards, however, I did devour with relish!

Tooke the medications. Got settled to watch some TV and was soon in the land of nod.

Woke with a start, and to the wetroom for a WRWW, where I realised it was not morning, but two hours after I’d nodded off. Tsk!

Back and got the head down. Sad innit?

Inchcock Today, stomach rumbling Sunday 6th November 2016


Sunday 6th November 2016

Spanish: Domingo 6 de Noviembre de 2016

Stirred into life again at 0115hrs, infested with a state of high anxiety and feeling rather capricious. The anxiety, due to the urgency of the need for a WRHD session. The capriciousness, I’ve no idea why.

A bit disappointed in not remembering any of the dreams I’m sure I’d been having. Especially after recalling so much of the night before’s. And the struggle to get out of the £300 second-hand recliner was not easy, cause it only went part the way down this time, Hehe! 

Again, like Saturday morning, the stomach played up after the WRHD session. 

By gum it was cold this morning, the kitchen thermometer was only 54°f. I thought as the kettle was started, that I could hear the wind, but realised it was the hot water tap I’d left running on full. Made a nice mug of Co-op 99 tea, but had to return to the porcelain for a WRWW.

I decided to get the washing done and collated the gear to take down to the laundry room. Got some clobber on, a box of recycling rubbish along with the bag and down to the foyer. There was still only one lift working this morning.

Took the box out to leave at the caretaker’s door. This made me wonder if he was alright, I’d not seen him for a week? Got the washing machine going on the short mode and returned up the lift and had to have another WRHD session again! Still, no bleeding from anywhere and the knuckles I’d singed on the oven were healing up very nicely. Hell of a thirst on me, so I made another mug of tea, but didn’t feel like anything to eat. The stomach still grinding away. Might be a good idea not to take a walk up to Aldi like I’d planned to do later. Best keep myself within a short distance from the Porcelain today, I thought!

7sun02Down again to the laundry room and moved the stuff into the dryer – oh dear, someone had not cleaned out the filter again.

Naughty! Still, it might have been someone who used the machine last was unable to bend down and do it? Or perhaps an idle old bugger? Hehe!

So I cleaned it up and got the dryer going on the extra-dry option. Back up again to the apartment, and got the medicationalistic requirement tended to.

7sun03I had to do the Enoxaparin injection into the tummy this morning. No bother, I’m lucky with not having any fear of needles or hypodermics (Trypanophobia).

Fair enough, mind, I do have fears of Deep Water, Women (Gynophobia), Walking on Snow & Ice and suffer from Ophidiophobia (Fear of snakes) and Spheksophobia (Fear of Wasps). I’m not too keen on politicians either. Would that be Politicophobia?Hehe!

Returned down and collected the dried togs and cleaned the filter and surfaces. Up to the flat again and, you’ve guessed it, to the porcelain! Put the clothes away.

Time for the medications took a diarrhoea capsule with the regular morning tablets.

Did some more updating on the diaries and some more graphicalisationing.

Got the urge to open the kitchen window now it was light, and I hung out of the above and took a picture straight down from the window, and to the left and down. I told you I was feeling in a capricious mood.


On the first one on the left, lower centre against the wall of the flats you’ll see a rectangle that sticks out from the building. That is out foyer come lobby. Just thought I’d mention it if anyone comes to visit me. That reminds me, I’ve had an idea for a graphic of Duncan (Robertson), my friend who came all the way from Birmingham and helped me out last Sunday with the computer and printer problems. I’ll get it done now.

Back in a bit.

Phew, that took some time, but I really enjoyed doing it. I shan’t show it on here yet, in case Dunc might like to use it on his site, or whichever.

Did a Morrison order for next week.

The rain came down a bit, so no chance of me going out. Little concerned about my innards imploding as they rumble merrily away again.

Did some Facebooking and graphicationalisationing. Worked on the WordsToUse file for over three hours.

7sun06aGot the fodder ready.

Pork Frikadellens, herbed potatoes in oil baked, tin garden peas, beetroot and eggs. Sourdough bread.

So tired and the stomach still churning away, I tried to watch some TV, but nodded-woke for hours.

Had a sweven, in which people were queuing up for advice from me, as I sat on a cloud at a desk, with guards armed with water pistols, leading individuals to the office in the cloud, they would ask their question, and I really felt that I answered each one without hesitation. This seemed to go on for years and years, but I grew no older, when one of the many asked “What is the meaning of life” I’d answer; “If you knew that, life would be forced to cease to exist”. Eventually, I had a tea break and phoned my brother-in-law Pete, asking him to make a plaque with this answer engraved on it?

0010hrs: Awoke with a start, off for yet another WRHD session, the stomach churning again, worse afterwards than before.

Whoopsiedangleplops! No chance of getting back to sleep. What with the stomach, me stubbing my toes and then banging my head as I bent down to pick up the toilet roll I’d dropped!

Updated this diary.

Inchcock Today Fri 22 Jan 16: A Long Day


Friday 22 January 2016


The rain set in this morning

I sprang awake at 0200hrs.

So I stumbled to the bathroom, to find sadly that Little Inchy had been bleeding again, the haemorrhoids flowing as well; and then remembered Jane and Pete were calling later. So I made a cuppa and got on with finishing my diary off and starting this one, so I would have time to get myself ready for their inspection… I mean visit… or do I? Hehe!

I know I will not be able to make the place or myself acceptable to their standards, but I feel should make the effort. Pete said yesterday he’d try to get the radio programmed and the binoculars set up for me, so that will divert their criticalisationing instincts and attentions I hope.

Laptop on and made a start.

After an hour or two, I made a start cleaning and titivating the flat; as quietly as I could so as not to disturb the neighbours.

I did the kitchen floor with some expensive straight-to-the-floor cleaner, using a large micro fiber cloth. Much better results than using the mop. But getting up and down to and from the ground level was a bit of a bother of course.

Having said that, the Arthritis is kind to me at the moment.

Nipped into the bathroom for what must have been my fourth visit up to now. Tsk!

Then as I was sweeping the hall, I noticed many letters had been posted. Bearing in mind, this was about 0555hrs? I suppose they must have been delivered yesterday, and I didn’t notice them?


This gives me some time to fret over the weekend until Monday when I can get to see them about it at their offices – again! Humph!

After getting notification of me being in rent arrears last month; I went down to see them. They changed the payment and assured me not to worry, all would be okay. Humph!

Must get to see them again. Might have time on Monday after my INR Warfarin blood-level test? Won’t have time today because of Jane and Pete’s apartment inspection taking place.

P1020891When I was doctoring this photo I took, of the mail, I came across a picture of yesterday’s satisfying meal, that I couldn’t find when I first looked for it yesterday? Damned poltergeist!

It was the best I’d enjoyed since being in the flat. Baked potatoes, potato farls, beetroot, and traditional Polish Frankfurters. Thinking about it, I’ll give Taste rating of 9.69/10.

Enjoyed a good scrub-up, and then did some graphicalisationing. Created a decent graphic to go along with my Ode about life, entitled ‘I get so excited!’.


Then got to work sorting the paperwork out and into the two file boxes.

Jane rang, she will not be coming to inspect the apartment now. She’s got a sore throat and sounded unwell the poor thing. Spoke to Pete, he will be coming up on his own.

Finished the sorting out and made a cuppa, realised I’d actually taken me medications. Humph! So, I just took the beta-bock, blood release, angina and reflux tablets.

It’s been raining since I got up at 0400hrs. I sorted and took down the bags of rubbish and recycle one to outside the caretakers door, as they were too big to get into the shoot. Met a couple of tenants and had a little chin-wag.

Pete arrived, and we had a good natter, and he programmed the battery radio for me. Then he set up the binoculars, so I had got them at the optimum settings.Got the laundry ready and went down and got it loaded into a machine in the laundry room. Nipped out to the community shed and handed the letter that’s arrived for the flats previous tenant Margaret.

I walked him down to his car, thanked him and wished Jane all the best with her horrible severe sufferings.

Got the laundry ready and went down and got it loaded into a machine in the laundry room. Nipped out to the community shed and handed the letter that’s arrived for the flats previous tenant Margaret.

Returned to the lobby and did my crosswords while I was waiting for the washer to finish.

Has a couple of little gossips to some tenants as they passed in or out of the building.

Got the washing transferred to the drying machine, and nipped up to the flat and updated this diary.

Down and collected the washing laundry room.

Back up to the flat and put the togs away.

The last N9 bus to Arnold was due at 1437hrs. I decided to catch it and go to Sainsburys and get some bread, potatoes and er… what was the other thing? I know there were three things… I suppose I’ll remember it when I get there and have a look around? Tsk! 

Had a quick bath and I readied things then set off to catch the bus. I was the sole person waiting for it.

01W04Dropped off at the Sainsbury store and had a wander round for ages.

Then strolled (Limped), into Arnold and popped into the Iceland store to get some Weight Watchers mini pots of ice cream and beef slices in puff pastry.

I ended up getting more than initially planned of course. Tsk!

P1020894Timed it to get to the bus stop after consulting the timetable I had with me. The last bus back was due according to the leaflet, at eleven minutes past the hour. I arrived lugging me bags at Ten to the hour.

The need for the usage of porcelain was growing in urgency.

The rain had stopped at last, but I fear the L9 buses had too!

P1020895I waited as all the other buses passing by picked up other passengers, and soon it was 20 minutes past the hour, no L9 bus.

So I caught another one and dropped off in Sherwood.

It was getting a bit dark quickly now as I walked up the hill towards the Woodthorpe Grange Park.

P1020897As I entered the broken iron gates into the park, the sky was so beautiful.

The moon appearing in haste, and the multi-coloured streaks of reds, purples, blues, etc. along with the darkening overall looked incredible.

I tried to capture it in this photo, but it didn’t come out very well.

I suppose my haste to get to the porcelain might have cocked-up my focussing?

Somehow, I painfully managed to get to the flat’s bathroom and the pain that awaited me. Hehe!

Got some fodder, took the medications and sat musing on things for a good while;

  • The rent arrears and how to get them sorted
  • My making Pete a cuppa and forgetting to give it to him
  • My buying unneeded nosh and overspending again
  • The constipation
  • The damned solicitors delaying the house sale 
  • My weight and belly increasing in volume and girth
  • The lost lottery ticket?
  • And why did I just pass wind that will probably affect tenants three floors up and down?

I got the TV paper and took a look at what was on offer. Some good stuff from eight until eleven.

I watched them in hundreds of episodes between my periods of nodding off, then needing the porcelain again around 1200hrs.

Felt a bit odd as I drifted off to the land of nod.

Fooey – The fantastic OAP Pussy Cat!

FooeynTales of Fooey

Here are a few Tales of Fooey I’d like to tell.

Fooey is one of me Sister Jane and Brother in Law Pete’s cats.

He’s now 98 years old in human terms.

He’s struggles to get about with his arthritis, looses his balance often nowadays too.

He’s not very good looking and drops off to sleep any-time, any-where.

He jumps and jerks with his dreams when kipping.

He’s a bit like me. (Hehe!)

Perhaps that’s why I love him so.

Occasionally he give out a loud wailing noise for ages for no apparent reason.

He often used to settle on his favourite chair and fall off of it! (Like me again, twice!)

He struggles with the litter tray and leaves a pungent aroma like no other cat I’ve ever known(Like me again with me haemorrhoids)

FooeyHe now sleeps on a low stool behind the patio doors. His choice.

He needs his coat sorting out daily, a special comb thingy me Sister Jane uses on his matted hair looks frightening to me, but he just loves it being done as clumps of hair are dragged off of him flesh, what bit he’s got left, he is very thin nowadays! (Not like me I’m afraid).

P1020099A poor waif of a stray all those years ago, they took him in and fell in love with him.

Yesterday I visited them all, Jane Pete and the three cats.

I saw something I would not have thought possible: Pete got the normal P1020097upright hoover out and hoovered Fooey!

The noise the Hoover made was tremendous, but Fooey being nearly deaf (Again somewhat like me) this didn’t seem to bother him in the slightest.

P1020101He was obviously well used to this treatment and hobbled around to help Pete not miss any bits of loose or matted hair.

Bless him (Fooey not Pete).

Took it all in his stride… well hobble!

He kept head-butting the Hoover pipe guiding Pete to where he wanted doing next – an amazing performance to me!

FooeyThe photo on the right was from some months ago – just after Fooey had had his Whoopsiedangleplop falling off his chair. You can see the scars on his poor head. (Like me again here!)

I just can’t help but love him to bits.

Being 19 years old now in human terms we all realise we may soon lose him. (Bit like me again! Tsk!)

So I thought I’d make up this post in his honour, so no one will ever forget him I hope.

A brave fighter with a wonderful nature.

FooeyTabI took this photo on the left last year of Fooey, or as Sister Jane and Pete named him, Mr Fooey!

He was in the middle of a dream when I took this photo.

Wailing occasionally and twitching away.

Foo01The photo on the right is one of my favourites.

He can only see so far, but on this occasion he’d spotted Jane going into the cupboard where they keep the cat-fodder.

He lost interest in me and kept his eyes on Janet then!

Bless his cotton socks!

Inchcock Today 24 Sept 15: By gum I got a lot done today, now shattered!

Thursday 24th September 2015

Woke 0015hrs.

Mouth felt like sandpaper, but surprisingly the toothache was no worse.

Cleaned up the kitchen stuff, WC’d and made a cuppa.

Started laptop to start of this diary.

Checked and replied to emails.

Did some Facebooking and graphicationalising.


Placed order from Morrisons for delivery tonight – got some big tins of sweets in to give as Christmas pressies while they were on offer price.

Another cuppa and took me medications, then started sorting some bags out.

P1020079Over four hours later and I’ve taken me corner stand to pieces and cleaned the wood, touch it up wood scratch liquid and left it drying ready for reassembly and polishing later.

I’ve cleaned the book case and sorted all the DVD’s out. Had to stack the box collections on the top to get em to fit in.

Notice the Certificate on there?

I found that in one of the bags of DVD’s I was sorting. Guess what it was for?

P1020080Then turned me had to reassembling the corner stand for me photo’s to go on. But I was not happy with the finish, too many blemishes and marks, so I’ll give it another session and try to get it right later.

I used two of the empty Ikea clothes rack boxes to put some cardboard and 01topj2paper in for recycling. I’ll take it down to the caretakers room later, the rubbish chute is far too small to get it down.

There’s still much to sort, but I’ll get there… wont I?.


I’d better do it now, then by some miracle I can maybe find the caretaker and ask him for the fourth time for some recycling bags. Tsk!

I’ll go now.

Back in a bit…

Saw one of the caretakers and asked him if they had any of the orange recycling bags and he had a look and gave me the last of his stock. I told him that I had been sorting me DVDs out and had many to give to the charity shop tomorrow… he answered “I’ll be up to take them when the Robert the  other caretaker arrives…” I was going to add if there is any you want you can have them.

Back up to the flat to get the mail for the previous tenant and down to the Community shed.

Gave them some nibbles but I forgot to get the letter – Tsk!

Back up to the flat and did a bit of work on the corner stand, but it’s going to take some time to get anywhere near right. Leaving it a bit longer this time before touching up again.

ALynda BettySantDid some graphics.

aaaTyler3I found this old photograph of yours truly in a box today: Of course you can tell just as soon as you it, it was taken thirty years ago.

WWarnLie Whoops!

Wanted to get a bath, but didn’t know what time the Caretakers would be calling.

Think I’ll nip down see if  find them and take the DVDs to them.

Off again down the lift… No sign of them.

Steve arrived and we had a chat about things. Although the flat was in a mess with all me moving stuff to see where it might fit it Steve was impressed with the progress I’d made.

He got onto the phone and called and made appointments with two possible house clearers for him to meet Monday and Tuesday to get the house cleared. Bit of progress there then, Good!

He then spoke with Pete, explaining everything that had took place. This was a bit unnerving for me as I thought things might get heated between them but it sounded as if they were in agreement with things – and of course, my phone bill will now be enormous after the forty minute call on me mobile. Tut!

 Still it went well.

Steve took the flea-pit key and some of me DVDs with him to watch, and told me he’s to get back to me after meeting the van-men and getting quotes from them.

I was well shattered and worn-out by then. But in good spirits with hopes that things might get moving soon… at last!?!?

P1020086Made me nosh.

Rated it as 8.2/10, and ate it with relish then nodded off again.

I wanted to have a bath but with the Morrison delivery due, I checked the corner stand to see if it was dry but it wasn’t so made a cuppa sat down and fell-asleep once more.

I kept waking and wondering if I’d missed the call on the intercom – but felt sure I hadn’t, as, as long as leave the door open I can usually hear the loud ringer on it even without me hearing aids in.

Well gone the time the delivery was due, the mobile phone rang. It was the driver who’d been caught in horrendous traffic and was a few miles away. No problem I told him, drive safely I’ll see you later.

He arrived, and to expound the situation, a bottle of kitchen-spray had leaked in one of the bags. Luckily it was in a bag with me curried beans and bottle of shandy so nothing was ruined. I felt a bit sorry for the bloke, he was already late and didn’t need this delaying him further.

I moved the stuff into the kitchen and cleaned the tins and bottle, put the rest away, looked around at the state of the place with the corner-unit on a sheet in the middle of the room and thought “How have I managed this, the place looked in more of a mess than ever! Tsk!

Put the other stuff anywhere and was now free to get a bath, but felt too tired to bother now.

Made a cuppa and realised I’d missed me medications. I’ll suffer for this… oh dear.

Kept nodding off for a few minutes and waking again – pee’d me of that did. Eventually very late I  must have got to kip – much needed it was I think, as I didn’t have to get up for the usual WC visits.

I’ve a feeling that today was a landmark day somehow?

Oh so tired and drained, I’d overdone it  reckon. The place looked worse hat before despite all me efforts. But mildly proud of getting things done.

Tomorrow I’m going to see Jane and Pete with their pressies for Christmas.

Tue 25 Aug 2015: Inchcock Today – He took a break from getting the house sorted – The little Monkey!

Tuesday 25th August 2015


0215hrs: Woke up aching all over and coughing and wheezing! (Oh dear boy, did I overdo it yesterday or what?) But I have to take help when I can get it don’t I? I thought to myself.

Finding somewhere that doesn’t ache or hurt in my wobbly-body this morning is proving difficult, nay, impossible!

Between me usual ailments and the newly accrued aches and pains from the last few days overdoing it like, I must say I may not complain if the end comes soon. There, now you all know. You will find me valuables all hidden in the lidded egg-cup wot I hid in the rusty black box full of sewing things in the bedroom – hidden inside a box marked “Life-like Blow-up dol…” well, its coloured pink… I amaze missen at times yer know. Here I am, not in the best of health and I should be morose and depressed, yet I still find missen writing jokes and humorous (I hope) funnies?

After losing me hearing aids, wrist health-alert alarm and me sanity in the last few days, I wonder what next. Hehe!

I keep getting ideas, and some passed to me for articles to do and post, but don’t feel I can concentrate enough at the moment, although I persist with this diary?

Made a cuppa and took me medications.

Got yesterdays diary finished and posted, started this one off, checked and answered to emails and comments, then did some Facebooking.

Got missen spruced up to go to the old place and do some more sorting out. Got to the bus-stop and me brother-in-law Pete rang…

Don’t you just hate that, there you are, bus-pass in hand gossiping at the bus stop outside the flat complex with around six other tenants waiting fer the bus… You see they have stopped talking, and a few moments later one of them tells you, your phone in your inside pocket is ringing and you take that long fumbling to get it out the caller has gone! Tsk!

Got on the bus – got off the bus and retrieved me free pensioners bus-pass from the pavement – got back on the bus, swiped the card and walked into the bus to be greeted with derision and laughter from the other folk for keeping them waiting. All light-hearted stuff though, I think.

I overheard someone behind me talking about the wall-clock from the reception area being nicked again. Apparently the replacement clock for one that disappeared last week, only lasted 5 hours this time before it was spirited away.

Pete rang back again. He wanted, being as this was the first day of the two new tram routes operating, to go on them. I was perhaps a little too keen to agree and miss doing the back-breaking work I should have been doing at the old place? Any road I said I’d meet him at his bus-stop in town.

I got into town with plenty of time to spare – glad I’d took me camera so I can photographicalise the tram routes for the Troll Free Zone gals and guys. As I went into Wilkinson’s to see if they had any of the place-mats I saw a bird on the roof of the pub that I’d never seen before (Not seen the bird not the pub before). I hastily got me camera out and focussed in close on it, as it flew away… not that it mattered… the camera informed me that there was no SCIM card in it – Grrr! I’d done it again and the card was back at the flat stuck in the laptop! That was the end of me photographic plans for the trip! Huh!

Got me mats and spatula then met Pete, we then made for the tram stop and caught the one to Chilwell. Getting on the tram was like packing sardines in a can – nearly all the passengers were old foggies like wot I am or screaming balling kids! The seats were uncomfortable. Not complaining like, just mentioning these things.

Trying to communicate with Pete amidst the deaf pensioners shouting at each other and the mega-gobby kids was not easy. Pete I reckon is as deaf as I am but vanity prevents him from getting hearing-aids.

We then returned on the next tram and dropped off at the station, then Pete wanted catch the other new service tram to Clifton – so we did. Not a pleasant outing but Pete seemed to enjoy it – he likes owt that’s free yer know – he gets his spectacles from the pound shop shop, not that he’ll wear em if any women are around, vanity again see – but don’t tell him I told yer mind so fer gawds sake!

Again we caught the next tram back, and as a little girl fainted right in front of me, as luck would have it, we were at the stop for the Queens Medical Centre. So her parents and sister took her off and into the hospital.

Pete dropped off to catch his bus at the station and I went on into the slab square in the City centre. Then into Primark to see if they had any of the strong socks in stock – as usual I came out a little worse off financially, but with some socks, underpants and a dressing gown. I have now sworn not to go in there again until I get the house sorted and sold!

I had a wander around until it was time for the last bus from town to the flats.

I was soon on the bus and met Norman with his mate as we got off we started to have a little natter as the rain started to come, we nipped into the flats as the Fire Alarm sounded and was told to nip out of the flats by Deana who appeared from inside to check the location on the fire panel – Norman wanted to go in to this flat, but the indicator said the fire was in the lift.

So we went out and awaited the fire brigade – Four tenders turned up in five minutes.

While we were waiting for the all-clear from the officers, for some reason both Arthur Itis and Anne Gyna gave me a painful visit with venom. Suddenly I was hobbling and struggling for breath like yesterday and first thing this morning?

We got the all clear and we went up and I got me washing ready in’t bag, the soap capsules, me camera and the SCIM card, crossword book, me umbrella and some nibbles and went down and got me washing in the machine.

Then thought I’d nip through the Park into Sherwood and get some bread.

So I did, glad I’d got me umbrella cause the rain came heavier on the way to the shops.

IMG_0109I called in the Co-op, but as it was getting late they had little choice left.

I walked down to the polish shop, where I held the door open to let in a none-talking lady.

No thanks and she got served first of course.


I walked out and back up to the Co-op and got a pack of bread thins after all.

The traffic was getting busy as I hobbled back to the top of the hill.

IMG_0108The rain kept up this on the way back too. But I managed to take a photo of a tree stump that had been cut into the shape of a seat – somehow I hadn’t noticed this before.

I pressed on and through the park back Woodthorpe Court through the not unpleasant rain and wonderful green coloured surroundings.

Back at the flats and inside the entrance foyer, I took a photographicalisation through the side IMG_0110window of Mugger Lane where the car parks and garages are between the beautiful trees as the rain belted down.

Back into the laundry room to see if me washing had finished, and a few minutes later it  did.

I transferred me togs into the drier and sat in one of the reception area seats and did some of me crossword book for an hour or so until the clothes were done – then IMG_0111packed them into me big Lidl bag.

The laundry room always reminds me of Alcatraz.

Got the lift back up to the flat, put away me togs.

Wash and got me new thin dressing DSC00033gown and jammy bottoms ready to wear. (Not warm enough!).

Used me new racks in the bedroom for the first time.

A break in the rain and I tried me new camera out with a photo taken from the kitchen window on full zoom of a dog kennel (or maybe a shed?) far away. Pleased with it.

Made a cuppa and took me medications – missed me midday ones – Humpf!

Laptop on and updated this twoddle.

IMG_0112Got me nosh done – herb tomatoes with streaky smoked bacon and bread thins followed by low-cal blackcurrant jelly.

Simple nosh but tasted grand! I rated this as 8.4/10.

Got into me new jammy-bottoms and long top then got me head down.

Well tired yet again.

Fri 7 Aug 2015: Inchcock Today – So busy he’s worn himself out. Poor mite!

Friday 7th August 2015

0405hrs: Woke, WC’d and got the laptop and kettle on.

Mused over me dreams: I’d got the old place sorted and sold… I was so glad and happy to be able to concentrate on the flat and had a load of people visit me, and they all wanted vegetarian sausages to eat?

Then I was at a football match and ran on the pitch, tackled Wayne Rooney and served him with a writ for knocking off a £2000 a time prostitute and being rude and crude in public?

I was glad  the cramps again had not been too bad last night – but still intend to get some magnesium tablets today from Holland & Barrett’s.

Spent ages finishing yesterdays Diary and doing graphics.

Had a wash shave and spruced missen up. The angina was a bit rough with me, the haemorrhoids bleeding but otherwise not too bad at all.

Got me bag with Sister Jane and brother-in-law Pete’s nibbles, letters delivered for Margaret the previous tenant to hand in at the community shed, and the paperwork I needed for Steve of Age UK when I meet him later at the old dump and cash and bus-pass.

Off to the shed and handed in the letters to the Obergruppenfurher.

To the bus stop and had a nice chat with some of the other residents.


Got the Magnesium Tablets at last

Dropped off the bus in town and had an amble to Holland and Barrett’s to view the Magnesium on offer. They had sprays, creams and tablets.

Being as the tablets of 100 one-a-day pills were on offer, buy two get the second for a penny… I did.

Walked to Pete’s bus-stop and met him. We had a little natter and worked out where we needed to visit.

I wanted to buy a battery operated radio for the bathroom with preselect channels and a clock to replace the one I dropped and broke – and Pete needed to go to the Asian shop for some cheesey seaweed, and Wilkinson’s for some bits.

We went around several shops looking for a radio but the cheapest we could find was £49.99, so I decided against it.

We went into Wilkinson’s Pete got his bits and I got a £3 alarm clock, same model as the one I broke.

Then we plodded to the Asian shop and i joined Pete in getting a pack of the cheesey seaweed fer missen.

Walked into the City Centre to have a look to see if any of the charity shops had a battery radio for sale – they didn’t.


A Dangerous Nottingham Pavement Cyclist

The plonker on the bike across the road was one of the most dangerous gits of Nottingham Pavement Cyclists I’ve ever come across, he was on his phone as he drove along the pavement and actually hit one woman and just carried on! Tsk Nasty Ignorant Swine!

Left Pete at his bus-stop after our second failed search to find a radio had concluded.

Hobbled up to Parliament Street, buying a salad cob on the way to the bus-stop.

Got off in Carrington and nervously made me way to the old house. Where I overdid it with the lifting and sorting. Made up four large bags of stuff for the flat. Then managed to carry some furniture out to the bins for the looters to take later. Then put weed-killer on the garden weeds, and there were many there.

I was lucky enough to find a part-used tube of Betmethasone corticosteroid cream and put that in me bag to treat ‘Little Inchy with in the morning if he’s been bleeding again.


Age UK’s Steve does some phoning for me

Utterly fatigued and me back was playing something rotten by the time Steve arrived at the house.

He rang BT for me to cancel me phone and Internet – found there would be a £42 charge for leaving them. And we had to ring them back on the 18th to confirm our decision?

Then he rang British Gas (You know them… the French company!) They informed us there would be a £30 fee, one months payment costs and 59p a day charge until we informed them the house had been sold???

I was losing heart by then.

Steve and I went upstairs which started me arthritis off to join Anne Gyna and me bad back. Feeling pretty weary and unwell by now. Steve brought some stuff down and then lifted me and two of the bags back to the flat, bless him.

I was so some pleased things had got done for once, but not pleased with state of health at all.

He came in with me and reclaimed his blow-up mattress that he’d lent me.

After he went I did feel a bit poorly, but forced missen to eat the cob with a cuppa. Didn’t feel hungry enough to bother making a meal – so drained.


Got me next lot of medications pots sorted and done

Did this diary and then had to sort out me medication pots to make sure the old and new ones had some magnesium tablets in each pot – that took over an hour, but I was pleased I’d got it done.

Remembered to put the Betamethasone cream in the bathroom so it’d be handy for the morning if needed.


Late Nosh – with slightly burnt pasty

Sudden Hunger pangs now – so made a quick nosh, instant cheesey potatoes, pasty, beetroot and tomatoes.

I may have overdone the pasty a touch?.

Way passed me bedtime now.

Must try to get some of laundry done tomorrow, it’s stacking up yer know…

And some of the paperwork to get sorted and shredded, oh, and get the cupboards emptied ready for the Nottingham Homes man to destroy the kitchen cabinets and drawers when they fill in the holes in the wall… Tsk, work work work… I’m working ‘arder now than when I actually working – Huh!