Inchcock’s Third Escape from the Lock-Down, to Nottingham. Photographically recorded!

Inchcock’s Third brave but stupid, Escape from the Lock-Down

We understand, that the Nottingham City Council Security, the Police, and the newly-formed Boy Scouts Woggle-Anti-Lock-Down-Escapers-Retrieval-Team are after him, again!

He arrived at Upper Parliament Street, where he spied and ogled some Nottinghamian ladies, on his way into the Poundland Store, had a Dizzy Dennis visit, and came out with more unwanted goods, such as Zoflora disinfectants, Carnation milk pots, Cooked beef misshapes, and 3×8 bags of his destroyers-to his diet, Frazzles!

He paid the lady, who helped him when he had his funny-turn and dropped his money on the floor, thanked her and made his way to the Bargain Shop on Milton Street. Observing a pair of fine legs-displaying young Nottinghamiam lady, crossing the road against the cross-walk lights. He forgave her we understand.

He patiently waited for some fine bottom-shaped, Nottinghamian Mothers to get there ankle-snappers locked securely in the pushchair, then entered the store. Hoping they would have some of the Pakistani made potato cakes, and lemon air-spray in stock. They didn’t. But the old fool felt so guilty at the thought of not buying anything, he bought a pack of four-mini oven trays, for £1.99, and left to walk through Trinity Square, up the incline, so as to take some pictures of Trinity Walk, but got yet another visit from Dizzy Dennis, and hobbled down to Upper Parliament Street.

The first of the Pavement Cyclist he saw on the short hobble, all-but ran into him. He claims to have called out, “You silly boy!” and waved at him.

Investigations are underway to find out what he actually shouted!

He limped down Queen Street to Nottingham’s Slab Square.

His near-miss at being run into again by another Nottingham Pavement Cyclist, (he says) drew a slightly more forceful response. The old grumpy claimed he said “Tsk! You rascal!”

He walked across to South Parade, where he took a shot of the side of the Council House. Not many folks there, so he turned back and took one of the Square.

He hobbled down Arcade Walk. Amused at how the Nottinghamians were totally ignoring the signs written on the paving stone, to keep to the left.

St Peter’s Square; and the silence was overbearing.

He says he felt like a disaster was about to take place, as he avoided another of the many Nottinghamian Pavement Cyclists.

He told our reporter, that he wanted after over a year and a half, to go into the M&S Foodhall, to get some treats from there ready-made meal section for himself. Shame that. He could not gain entry with his walker to any door but one, all the others have stairs or step that needed tackling to get in. So, after a long painful hobble around he found the doorway, and for his bother, got walked into by two rather large ladies coming out. He could not tell what they said to him, but the words were accompanied by some well-used, superior class sneers and curled lips.

Then he had to walk for what seemed miles, to get to the lift down to the Food Hall. Luckily, there was no one wanting to use the lift, which pleased him, but felt odd, the place used to be very busy all of the day? When he got down, it was a very sad sight! The Coronavirus has had a shocking impact, for M&S. Fridges were curtained off and not in use at all! The usually well-stocked shelves looked bare, by comparison now. 

The fool paid £2 for a tiny bag of small potatoes, £1 for a mini tray of basic mushrooms, £2 for small-box of Frites, and £2.50 for four minuscule potato-rostis!

He got to the checkout and had another Dennis Dizzy visit, and Stuttering Stephanie hit him. He claims he was overcharged, but who knows, in the state he was in, owt could have happened.

The poor old senile nincompoop struggled to get up the lift and out of the one door he could use, and onto Lister Gate again.

Back wearily up Exchange Walk, with his famously-reliable EQ, telling him that hassle of some sort was on the way. Which didn’t take long to arrive!

He took a zoomed-in shot with his little Canon camera towards King Street, as a Pavement Cyclist zoomed by his, and he felt the draught the speeding idiot made!

Another Pavement Cyclist came into view.

Then another one, too!

This one came close to hitting the old codge, he came from the rear. Inchcok refused to tell me what actual words he shouted at this Pavement Cyclist.

This particular Pavement Cyclist gave our Nottinghamian pensioner a few looks!

The old scrote carried on his way up to the bus stop, and a final Pavement Cyclist belted by him. He claims he was tired, pee’d off and Dizzy Dennis was visiting him again at this stage. There might be something in what he says cause he can’t remember the bus ride back to Winwood Court!

He says he didn’t see a single policeman all day!

The can recall getting off of the bus though, he cracked his ulcered ankle on the trolley-walkers right-hand back wheel!

This was written and potomagraphed, under great stress. Just thought I’d mention it!

Coping with Old Age – Inchcock Style

Coping with Old Age – Inchcock Style

Wrote in SuPport of the fethaurus Users league

Like Corona Virus and wee-weeing, it comes to us all,

Like dizziness, madness and having many a fall,

You can’t prevent it, like a rainy squall,

It’ll come, Summer, Winter, Spring or Fall,

You might be having rumpy-pumpy, or playing beachball?

Football, tennis, baseball, trying to throw a curveball,

Or you could be summoned to the guildhall,

Nowt will stop ageing, for eternity, you may trawl,

But as I say, it doesn’t matter at all,

Ailments, disabilities, agony to recall,

Life is just a struggle and a brawl,

Unfairness, those who seem to have it all,

Money, good looks, who lives are a ball,

Even for them, live will stall,

Death is perfectly natural,

Mind you, them who live at Balmoral,

Though, lacking in some moral,

Live longer, that’s connatural,

It’s us commoner’s, with no collateral,

Who was accepting our being visceral,

But death, well, it’s gone viral,

For the underprivileged, hopes, are not transferable,

Though, commitment is not endurable,

Life is not so cheery, easy, or affable,

Things can get so bad, death is advisable,

But still, you must admit, it can be laughable!

I wish that humour was bequeathable,

And seeing the future was browsable,

Wouldn’t it nice, if death was cancellable!

Just a thought! – I had one in 1958 as well!

Inchcock – Wednesday 10th June 2020: Another escape to town, in the rain. An Irritable day, with the odd pleasant highlights

Wednesday 10th June 2020

Filipino: Miyerkules ng Ika-10 ng Hunyo 2020

00:00hrs: Already up, and finished working on this updating of the Tuesday post, and sent it off.

Then went on the WordPress Reader section. Then I Pinterested a few snaps, next onto Facebook. Spent some time on Facebooking. But it eases and pleases me, and I enjoy it. Then, on to CorelDraw to get some graphics done.

Oh, Gawd! From nowhere Dizzy Dennis attacked, I really did think I was going to fall off of the swivel chair, and a headache developed at the same time, on the right side of the head! Enough, when I felt stable enough, I got sat down with a drink of orange juice, Shuddering Shoulder Shirley kicked off, which prevented me from nodding off for a while, but sure enough, as things calmed down further, I drifted off into the land of nod!

I stirred around 06:00hrs. Disinclined to wake or get up, and the Thought-Storms started. The need for a wee-wee arose, and the urgency increased. So at least that got me and my oleaginous, body out of the £300, c1968, second-hand, not-working, disconnected rickety recliner, and to the wet room.

A brand new style off wee-wee today, (It’s interesting having so many ailments!) I’ve Christened the mode as UDYP (Urgent-Deep-Yellow-and-Painful). It’s encouraging to be able to report that Little Inchies fungal lesion was not bleeding at all! All done, washed the hands and contact points, and as I was going out of the door, I had to go back in to deal with another rushing-gush wee-wee of the same variety!

I wiped and washed again, and off to the kitchen to do the medicationalisationing.

For some reason, unknown to me, as the bare feet got on the floor tiles, they were so cold to the touch?

The BP readings were different this morning. SYS well up, at 173, DIA 83, Pulse 77, and Temperature was 37.8°c. When I got out the tablet dispensers, I worked out that I had enough up until Saturday morning. This is when ILC, Ballerina, Comforter, Obersturmbannfuhreress, and Warden, Deana, said they should be delivered by the Carrington Chemist. I made a brew…

Gordon Bennett! The first sip was taken, and agony invaded the teeth! Cricky, it made me jump! Of course, the toothache was well set in, and kept on all through the day! Gragnangles! 

Coronavirus is to blame for many of my new ailments.

  • The chemist cannot get the Saccades Sandra spray yet!
  • The paediatrist is closed until further notice!
  • The dentist is closed until further notice!
  • The Audio Clinic (Running out of hearing aid batteries) closed until further notice!
  • The Opticians closed until further notice!

I decided I’ll see if I can get out and about later, and try the audio clinic for some batteries. That is if I can manage the haul up that terribly steep and demanding Park Row hill. Might I change my mind later?

I took a photo of Chestnut Walk. I think there is a free car parking space available. A seldom known, extraordinary happening here at Windwood Heights?

I got on with updating. The rain and darkness repeatedly came and went, and finally, the updating got finished. The job was all done and dusted.

Off I trudged to the wet room.

The ablutions were soon got into with gusto. The shaving didn’t go exactly according to plan. But the teggies were painless, well not pain-free, cause of Toothache Thomas, but at least I didn’t have any bleeding from the gums.

The pins were looking a little battered, and still very much of the ghostly-anaemic design! The volumingargantuan, onerous hog-like, ponderosity, bulk, flabby stomach, may well have gained a couple of inches of girth overnight? But I’m sure I did not do any nocturnal nibbling?

After getting myself dressed (I can do it on my own now, you know, Hahaha!), I pottered about faffling, panicking, and double-checking everything before I dare set out to catch the bus to town to get the hearing-aids (And take some photographs).

I went for a wee-wee, and this time it was of the SS (Short-Sharp) mode of exudation and was the colour of a suppuration, it really was yellowy-green!  Don’t be jealous, though, if you live long enough, it can still happen to you. Then all these exotic, appealing ailments, Whoopsiedangleplops, Accifauxpas and mysteries I write about, will become apparent and understandable for you. I didn’t mention logical on purpose. (Hahaha!)

A semi-serious, convoluted message came from my EQ! It was certain; The trip out was going to be frustrating and depressing. I should consider not going out! Mmm? The Emotional Quotient is rarely, if ever wrong! Foolishly I ignored the warning and got everything needed in the three-wheeler guide, made sure the bus-pass, door swipe, keys and crossword book were taken with me. Double checked the lights, faucets and electrics, all seemed okay, and off I went. With a big bag of recyclable material over my shoulder (not really, it was on top of the trolley, Haha!), and out I hobbled.

Down, bag in the bin, and ambled along Chestnut Drive, as the drizzle started to come, camera at the ready. I stopped for a few moments under the Chestnut tree while the rain was more substantial, but it soon weakened to just the odd spit falling.

As I got to the bus stop, I met Welsh William. I told him about Timothy Price’s marvellous clip of the owlet and told him if he gave me his email address, I’d forward the link. Then told him of what happens in the video. No interest was shown, which surprised me, I thought he’s loved to have seen it. He went off talking to someone else. Ah, well! Bless him, his free choice.

I limped over to where Peggy and Christine were nattering and bothered them. (Hehehe!) Peggy had on a seriously good face-mask, black, and it looked good quality built. Christine had hers on, and me too! They then told me that, from next Monday, anyone travelling on a bus must wear a mask. I decided to get another or two while out today.

They all got on the Bestwood bound bus with some other tenants, and I was all alone again. Then, slowly it dawned on me why! I’d got the bus times wrong once-again, Humph! I think that my EQ was right! With only going out once in months, I’d forgotten about the L9 service now being on a permanent Saturday roster, meaning a bus every two hours! I did feel a clot!

Back to the flat, and I took a few more photographs en route. One of Winchester Court main entrance. The flowers outside Winwood Court’s foyer, they were beautiful, especially so, with the petrichor, the aroma of earth and rain! Lovely! Then snapped the frontage of Winwood Court. A lot of open windows today?

Back to the apartment, and put these pictures into the computer. A letter had been received, telling us work will be taking place on the roof and will be noisy.

It’s going to be a long day, now I have to catch the 10:30hrs bus. (If I knew then, what I know now, I wouldn’t have bothered going out, the hearing aids batteries, and a mask so I can get on a bus, persuaded me to go though! Of course; as you will read later, I managed to get neither of wanted items! (Note to Self: In future, do not ignore the EQ!) Grumblecronkackers!

I set out once again to get the bus, at the right time this time, for the 10:30 L9. I was the only passenger to get on, but the bus was fullish, and with the side-saddle seats not in use, I had to sit on the outside of a standard chair, and hang onto the three-wheeler, to prevent it rolling away at each corner the Graham Hill fan, the driver took.

I was feeling worn out by the time we got into Nottingham. I was going to call into Wilko and the Poundland shop to see if the yhad any face-masks in. But, Wilko’s had a note on their window, telling us they had none left, but would do their best to get some for us!

And the socially-distanced queue for the Poundland shop filed around the corner for hundreds of yards! So, I had a walk to the Poundstretcher store on Milton Street. This where I got the face-mask from last week. Of course, they had none left in stock, either! Gragnackles!

However, I did get of my favourite McVities orange flavoured chocolate biscuits. A bottle of Woolite washing liquid and a bag of black bags.

As I came out of the shop, into the more torrential rain now, I met Gertrude, an old friend from years ago, and we had a natter in a doorway to keep dry. But her telling me she had just gone tot he Audio Centre to get herself some hearing aids, and they were closed, did not do me a lot of good! Silver-Lining Search Result: At least this saved me hobbling up the hill to find out!

I made my way through Trinity Square, avoiding the now-famously suicidal and dangerous to others, Deliveroo pavement cyclists.

It was a depressing hobble. What with so few people about, and those I met or spoke to were all down in the dumps, or in a snappy mood.

The change of rules for the bus passengers having to wear face-masks, causing another shortage of supplies.

The drizzling rain soaking us all through. 

The much colder weather, and a general atmosphere of, well, what’s the words I’m looking for? Depression is too strong a word… oh, I don’t know though!

I walked down and through the Slab Square and onto Wheeler Gate, noticing the two, what looked like new Police Community Officers, in their brand new uniforms and stab-vest, watching as they ambled around, ignoring the pavement cyclists, the vehicles parked on double-yellow lines. A scuffle taking place for a moment on Long Row encouraged them to walk up King Street in the opposite direction.

I called in the Poundland shop there, and they were not busy at all. The manager even greeted me as I went in, asking me, cheerily; “To take your time, no rush, you might spend more then!” Hahaha! It worked, no face masks available there either, but I did spend a bit. Buying, 2 lemon-sherbet concentrated disinfectants, (No, I’m not joking) 2 Lemon Verbena & Cucumber air sprays, (No, I’m not jesting here, either, Hehe!) 1 can of beef in gravy for a quid. 1 pack of Indian seedless grapes, a packet of walnut-halves, and cashew nuts. A packet of BBQ chicken pieces, and a packet of pork slices with stuffing! And a pack of six mini-jelly pots! By gum, the lady who helped me put them through earned her can of G & T!

I paid-up and had a hobble in the rain to St John’s Church, and called in the Sainsbury’s small shop, to see if they had any face-masks available. Nope! Shame! But they did have some decent looking tomatoes of which I bought a pack and some seafood sticks.

I had a wander around the City Centre, before going to the bus stop, cause I had plenty of time. I spotted the imitation police officers, now on Upper Parliament Street.

I made my way to the top of Queen Street. The drizzle was easier now.  A police car sped by, followed by an ambulance. And the Theatre Royal & Royal Concert Hall, surely one of the ugliest building ever built?

Then as I was going down to the bus stop, one of the infamous Deliveroo cyclists, floated down Queen Street at a fast rate of knots, in the wrong direction. Queen Street is one way, up the hill!

I considered pointing this illegal Road Traffic Act naughtiness out to the two heroic imitation policemen who were still nearby, with their hands in their new tunic pockets, keeping away from the earlier well avoided, Long Row scuffle.

But they had given me some rum looks when I photographed them earlier, so I thought better of it. Hahaha!

The L9 arrived with two drivers, and they kept me out in the rain for a few minutes while they chatted. No help offered in getting my heavily overloaded walker-guide onto the bus. I had to sit in the same deadly seat as going into town. They got off, of the bus.

I got one of the chicken pieces out of a bag to nibble. When the boss man got back on, he said: “There’s no eating allowed on the bus, youth!” And kindly offered me a scowl, worthy of a David Cameron sneer! And so I stopped eating!

The ride home was uncomfortable and I banged my ankles, elbows and knuckles, more than a few times as I fought to stop the trolley wandering off each time the bus screeched around a corner.

I was well in the dumps by the time we got back to Winwood Heights.

EQ was right! Colin Cramps were coming on already!

As I got into the flat’s foyer, Josie came behind me, and we had a little natter. When she heard of my problems in getting a face-mask, she fetched one for me to have. How kind of her! I got the fodder put away, and made a mug of Glengettie.

I updated this diary for a couple of hours, then, very late on now, I got the beef nosh sorted out. Beef and gravy, with extra caramelised gravy added, potatoes, garden peas, apple pies, seedless grapes, and lemon yoghourt. Flavour rating: 8/10.

So late, so tired, and soon slid into a much-needed sleep.

An Irritable day, with the odd pleasant highlights.

 

Inchcock’s Great Escape! Photographing pavement cyclists, chinwags, and nit-picking, to his heart’s content!

2Tue13a

Fanmarveloustic! Chinwags, From a Socially acceptable distance, of course! And great weather!

Well, Jenny, bless her, delivered the lemon bleach and yoghourts she’s ordered for me good and early. Left them near the doorstep. Thus, I had time to rush about, (this may be a slightly excessive description) and get ready for my much longed for, my first trip out on the bus into town, for months! Excitement flooded the brain!

I made a complete hash of getting ready. It’d been so long since I went out, many things confused my poor old stale, addled brain:

  • I had to leave the socks off, cause they were too painful to wear!
  • Thus, I had agony with the feet and toes. But no matter, I was in my seventh heaven, about to escape into the outside world again!
  • Where were the unused for nine weeks flat keys? Found them quickly
  • Where was the bus-pass card, unused for nine weeks? This took yonks to find!
  • Where was the cash card? This took an aeon to find!
  • Time was getting on, so I put on the coat I last went out in. The heavy one!
  • Going to be interesting fun this, no hearing aid batteries!

I got the three-wheeled walker-guide, made sure some spare shopping bags were in it. And a few pressies in case I encounter any of the regular kind shop staff. And off I set!

Picture based record of the best day out for months. Well, it the first one!

Down in the elevator.

2Tue14

Checked on the electronic notice board, no rush after all. 12-minutes before the bus was due! A hobble down Chestnut Walk

2Tue14a

Met several tenants, and had a chinwag or two, en route to the bus stop.

At the stop, people were mostly being sensible and keeping to the social distancing rules. I had a natter with Margaret, Christine and Steve. The bus arrived, and Christine seemed to be aware of my nervousness getting on the bus.  On the short trip down the hill, she made me feel comfortable as we chinwagged.

I followed others who had got off the bus, down to the bus stop for a ride to town. Oh, dear, I was a tad confused getting on, but someone put me right. Each second side-saddle seat had been taped off and not in use. But there were not any available. Now there I was with my trolley, and in a pickle as to what to do. But a gentleman saw me in a ponder, and got up from a side-saddle, and moved to another seat, freeing it for me. Bless him!

We all got off at Victoria Centre, Christine had to remind I needed this stop. Haha! I chatted with her for a while, and she told me of the L9 bus being on a two hour Saturday timetable, and that I needed to get the bus back at 11:05hrs.

I felt so cared about, it was lovely.

2Tue14b

I hobbled, (and the feet were giving my terrible gip) along Milton Street, and called into the old Poundstretcher shop. They, like the other shops, had set a new layout, and the in-door had been blocked off. I had a hunt around the grocery shelves, in search of some Pakistani potato cakes. But could not find any. But I still got to the checkout with; A can of Bonners BBQ sauce, Italian lemon cookies (Froletti Al Limone), Largeish bottle of Light Soy Sauce at £1.49. You’ll like this, a small packet of… ready for it; Asolo Dolce, Alla Marmellata di Arance! Which was Strudel with orange jam! Haha! And, All’Arancia Limone cookies. Finally, a face-mask, for a quid! I didn’t find out until I got home and could use the magnifying glass, it was made in Turkey.

2Tue14c

I still found it hard to believe how few people were about. Milton Street, apparently the busiest in Nottingham City Centre, had six Nottinghamians, and so many closed stores!

2Tue14d

As I crossed over Lower Parliament Street to get to the Poundland store, four cyclists came along the pavement, more or less at the same time. I struggled to get the camera out, by then there were only the two in the above picture left in view.

Into the shop, and they too had changed things around. I got a bit puddled trying to find the disinfectants, and I asked a lady assistant where they were; I followed her non-verbal finger that pointed towards the shop door, thanked her, and went to find them. The maze of aisles was challenging to manoeuvre around, with so many being blocked by the shelf fillers. Not that I blame them, they’ve got a job to do. With hopes high, I approached the fresh food fridge, almost tasting Pork Farms pie as got there. But, no, they didn’t have any. Which is a good thing really, I shouldn’t eat them anyway. But I did spot the tasty Frankfurters were in stock. I can’t work out why, but this brand, despite having less meat in than others are so filling and flavoursome. That’s tonight’s nosh sorted! Potatoes, peas, mushrooms, tomatoes and franks!

I did overspend, though!

WDPBaWD 150.0.0 02 I got to the checkout. As I was struggling anyway to put the basket on the counter, guess what? Without any warning or twitches, Peripheral Pete’s right-legs did a Neuropathic Schuhplattler dance routine, and to make things more embarrassing, Shuddering Shoulder Shirley had a bash at me! The basket tipped off the counter, and I made things worse by grabbing at it and spilling everything out onto the floor! Grobognangles! A lady arrived to help me, I moved out of her way, and she calmly gathered the goods and put them back in the basket and onto the counter for me. I mumbled my apologies, and the Tut-tutting from those behind me grew louder! To make those waiting angrier and even more likely to belt me one in the kisser, I’d bought a bottle of disinfectant, that was two for the same price as one, a quid. The kind lady pointed this out to me and called for someone to get another bottle for me. This was not making me very popular at all!

Yet the understanding of the serving lady was so much appreciated. The leg was still twitching a bit, and I feared it might ‘Dance-off’ again. So I paid the lady, thanked her, and hobbled to the door. I swear a heard a ginormous ‘Sigh’ from behind me!

2Tue14e

Getting out back on the pavement, I took a shot of Parliament Street traffic; or lack of it. It was a sad sight. Made worse by so many obstreperous, leary, ignorant, dangerous, uncaring pavement cyclists. Notably, the scruffy-haired, tattooed neck and ear tab young delinquent who almost ran into me while I was taking the photo above, from behind! While I had the camera out, I turned to my left and took a shot of the end of Milton Street, then got in one of the closed-down shops’ doorways and sorted the weight distribution of the things in the trolley-basket and two carrier bags.

2Tue14f

I’d bought a bottle of Aquafresh mouthwash, the two disinfectants for a pound, Frankfurters, Cheeslets, cashew nuts, a concentrated Lemon & mint, and Lemon disinfectants, and a (Not joking) Lemon & Sherbert freshener!

2Tue14g

As I was passing the end of Milton Street, I was nearly assaulted by two pavement cyclists, from either direction! I caught a snap of the younger of the two illegal, contemptible, parasitic, moronic,  spit-worthy urchins in this picture above.

2Tue14h

Now here’s a rare sight, Milton Street with no moving traffic on it!

2Tue14i

I got along to, and down King Street. The whole thing seemed so, almost hallucinatory. All I could see down the hill were two people! Weird!

2Tue14j

As I got towards the bottom of the road on my way to the Slab Square, it got crowded, (Hahaha!) The spunk-bubbling, repugnant, detestable, unlikeable, arrogant pavement cyclist put on a display here. Unfortunately, I only caught this one parasite coming up the hill with my trusty Canon lens.

2Tue14k

A little further down, and sod me, another sycophantic, tellurian organism of a pavement cyclist appeared. But I contained my hatred, fear and desire to knock the froward, mordant, noxiously pestiferously whippersnapper-bugger off of his bike… mainly cause he’d only belt the hell out if afterwards. Hahaha!

2Tue14L

A handful of Nottinghamians in the Slab-Square, the quietness was eerie, and Nottingham’s Fothergill Watson designed building opposite, showing a sharp contrast the newer erections in the background, and was a touch saddening.

2Tue14m

I turned to make my way to the bus stop, and a smidge of concern suddenly came over me. “What happens if the Coronvirus makes a comeback? And how come, it hasn’t seen off many pavement cyclists? Makes you think, dunnit?

2Tue14N

Ah, another PC (Pavement Cyclist) made an appearance, as I turned up Queen Street towards the L9 bus stop.

The mind wandered as I limped slowly up the hill, Brian Clough’s statue on my right, The old Prudential Buildings, more pavement cyclists, not a sign of a policeman all day, how come I’ve gone for nearly two days without needing the porcelain throne?

2Tue15

The sheer magnificence of Fothergill Watson’s architectural designs. How come, I’ve gone so long without wanting a wee-wee? I was really into the mind-straying and changing routine, as I got to the top of the hill. But it came to a sudden end.

WD 150.0.0 02 When I caught my foot on the wheel of the trolley as I secured it, in the middle of the pelican crossing refuge, to take this photo of Parliament Street, in all its bleakness. The burning, throbbing pains from the toes and souls of the feet were excruciating, and that’s no exaggeration. It ended my day out, in a despicably nauseating style. But it wasn’t quite finished yet.

2Tue14O

I waited for and caught the L9 bus. Having to sit with the trolley in front of me was a bit awkward and difficult. The brakes on the three-wheeler would not apply? Which meant I had to sit leant forward, holding onto the trolley, to stop it rolling away for the whole journey. This stopped my blood flow, and Shuddering Shirley and Colin Cramps accompanied me. However, once Christine got on the bus, I concentrated on her amusing and witty tales. We had a laugh or a few en route home. She kindly didn’t run off, but walked at my steady pace and chatted as we walked the length of Chestnut Walk back to our beloved Woodthorpe Court. We waited for the lift, and Chrissie went up as we said our farewells to each other. It felt like I’d been out for hours and hours, and the fatigue was dawning. But, when I took a snap of the electronic notice board, as I did when I departed, showed me that I’d only been out from 09:20 to 11:41hrs.

2Tue14p

I got the lift, and with there still being no call for a wee-wee or the Porcelain Throne, I put the purchasers away and made a super-duper mug of Thompsons Punjana.

———————————————————————————

3.7 hours out in the fresh air,

I have to say the weather was fair,

Pavements Cyclist apart,

And the toe-stubbing on the cart,

It made the day for this worrywart,

I’m so glad to be back in my lair!

GC June 14e
Cheers, folks!

Inchcockski – Monday 1st June 2020: A muddled, flummoxing Monday!

MJune0

2020 ttttMJune01

Monday 1st June 2020

Hmong: Hnub Monday 1 Lub Rau Hli 2020

00 MJUNE 01 mix

GM05 150.0WD 150.0.0 02:30hrs: I woke, in no mood to become active in mind or body. Gawd blimey, I was still so tired! Never have I had such Clinomania, and reluctance to wake up, let alone get up! A little discussion between my brain vs my lack of willpower and interest in anything, resulted in the recreance winning this time, and I nodded off into sweet obliviousness.

WD 150.0.0 03:10hrs: I stirred again, and had another battle with myself as to get up or not! I seemed to be in a state of hypnagogia again. I felt I had to rise, whatever the body and ailments told me, and I was determined to. I fell asleep again!

04:10hrs: I came back to reality yet again. This time with the need for a wee-wee, forcing me to beat my reluctance for returning to the land of the living. Robotically, I inched my ginormous wobbly-stomached burdened body out of the creaking, £300, second-hand c1968, grotty, repellently beige-coloured recliner, with the sticks assistance, I got up onto my painfully long toenailed feet.

1Mon02As I struggled to get to the wet room, I espied signs of nocturnal nibbling on the Ottoman tray! But at the time, no feelings of guilt were sensed, for the wee-wee was getting more urgent now!

WD 150.0.0a Unfortunately, in my haste, I knocked corner stand, and I heard things fall off of it. No stopping, onward, the wee-wee must be released! And what a wee-wee! An HPSAUOC (High-Pressure-Sprinkly-Unexpectedly-Orange-Colour) style. But not a long one, and no pain with it, so that was good!

As I was cleaning and medicating Little Inchies bleeding fungal lesion, in between the stabs of pain as the Daktacort® 2% w/w Miconazole nitrate and hydrocortisone cream was applied, it dawned on me, (things like this do happen (occasionally). I spotted some empty clementine juice cans on the Ottoman. 1Mon05

I wonder if these might be the reason the orange wee-wee?

The ankle-ulcer was looking far betterer, and Arthur Itis was not acting up too much either, which was a plus.

It might have been my eyes or desire, but when I sneezed, I’m sure the Big Belly Bernard shook less than usual? (Well, I can dream?)

Also, and as well as, Anne Gyna was kind to me. No Dizzy Dennis or Reflux Roger, Shaking Shaun or Back-Pain-Brenda visits!

WDP 002ARFair enough, Toothache Tim and Duodenal Donald were making up for this, and a sore throat was developing. But overall, this getting up late seems to suit me? But, of course, most likely it just fooled the other ailments temporarily. Arnie Schwarzeneggers? They’ll be back! Hehehe!

Washed and off to the kitchen. Where I took a distance shot from the kitchen unwanted, light & view-blocking, thick-framed windows, there were obviously designed by someone suffering from ‘Mere-Exposure Effect’ syndrome.

It was my Zyrophobia suffering, supercilious Brother-in-law Pete, who made me take a close-up, of the City Hospital. The poor lad will be in there this morning, having another biopsy done on his mystery ailment. I thought it might cheer him up a tad, reading this if he can afterwards. The yellow rectangle is the area I zoomed into for the second shot.

1Mon03

All the best, Pete, mate! Nowt you can do, but await the results now. I pray they are good news. I have thought you’d have escaped and taken a photo of the flats? Hehehe!

WD 150.0.0 I made a brew of Thompsons Punjana tea, took the medications and got the thermometer and sphygmomanometer out. The machine was like me earlier this morning, not interested in working!

1Mon02a

It took me three tries to get it to work. (it took me the same to get up! Hahaha!) 

1Mon05The plates of meat were giving me some stick, and for some unknown reason, the area around where the ankle ulcer comes up now and then was extremely itchy. Yet there were no signs of any inflammation or new growth? With the nails getting ever longer, I’d continued not to wear socks, I even took the slippers off to ease things.

But they’ll go back on after the 1Mon05aablutions are done.

WD 150.0.0 The stomach felt a little firmer, I think. But this might be and usually is, a prewarning of the innards about to kick off. I anticipate a battle between Trotsky Terence and Constipation Conrad to ensue. Which will prevail I wouldn’t guess. Lately, it seems to go from one extreme to the other nearly every day. Still, it makes for a bit of interest. Haha!

WD 150.0.0 Toothache Tim kicked off on the first sip of tea! That put the mockers on drinking ant brew for the rest of the day. Gangleboggleisations!

WD 150.0.0I made a start on the blogging update. It was as if someone was turning on a tap every half-hour or so. I swear you can see the imprint of the four-pronged walking stick, and outline of my feet in the carpet, to and from the wet room, I had hobble there so many times! Silver-Lining Search Result: But, at least I got the update done in reasonably good time, with only Shuddering Shoulder Shirley giving any real hassle. My thanks to Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters, Shaking Shaun and Dizzy Dennis! Bless you, all!

WD 150.0.0 After the umpteenth wee-wee, I made a mug of Glengettie tea and went on CorelDraw while it cooled down before trying it. Argh! Toothache-Tim, was not pleased, in the least! I threw it away. That’s the end of my tea drinking for the day! I took an extra Codeine 30g. (Too late now of course. Silly old sausage!) 

I set up the template for today’s blog. Then went on the WordPress reader. Then onto the Facebooking, which I enjoy so much. Then it was time for the ablutions to be tended to.

1Mon06CcI’d done the teeth, bloodlessly, but it was a bit painful with Toothache Tim nudging his way into the scene. (Swank-Adopted!) While I was moving the clothes, I’m sure I saw the shape of a rabbits head in the moved flannels. Can anyone else see it, or am I going daft? Or maybe I should say, dafter?

1Mon06CaI photographed the stomach before and after the shower. But there was no difference as I could see.

The shaving activity brought about a few dropsies, not many. Razors (4), shaving foam can (2), and a decentish clouting of the back of the hand against the sink. The showering went fine, in fact so well, I was considering giving myself a medal. Hahaha!

1Mon06CbI got dried off and set about the perfumery and medication duties. These took longer than the teggies, shaving and showering out together! Olive-piled the ear-holes first. No Saccades Sandra spray left to use, Grungleclapskin! Applied the Germoloid cream (Wince!). Then got some after-shave on the one tiny cut. Sprayed the Brute deodorant over the elephantine body. Last of the Brute spray used up! Got the Phopain gell well-rubbed into the knees. And carefully, Note no toe-stubbing 1Mon06Cor dropping of the showerhead again! Smug Mode Adopted! I made my way to the front room to get clothed.

I had to get the slippers on, a sharp intake of breath, and a silently mumbled ‘Argh!’ later, and I was ready to get the black bags and recycling prepared for taking downst1Mon06dairs.

While doing this, I decided that tomorrow, I will try to catch a bus to town, (if they are running) and visit, (if they are open), the Poundland shop, now my curfew has been eased. It’s all a bit vague innit? Later I’ll ask on the Winwood Heights Facebook, is anyone knows about the buses and Poundland.

WD 150.0.0 I got the bags made up, and onto the three-wheeled trolley walker. Off to the waste chute room. Gawd! the toes and plates were giving me agony! I pondered over whether going out tomorrow was a good idea or not after all?

1Mon07I struggled a bit getting the bags in the chute, not because they were heavy or large, they weren’t. The problem was Shuddering Should Shirley had kicked off again, and she meant business this time. This encouraged the right legs involuntary drop-something and have a Neuropathic Schuhplattler dance. Nearly had me over, so it was a good thing I was in such confined space at the time!

I left the trolley in the lift lobby. taking a moody photo of it, with the shadows, as I returned to the flat, to pick up the fob key, just in case when I went down with the big bag of recyclables, I got locked out. (It has happened more than once, Tsk!)

1Mon08Back and collected the trolley, using the walls in the narrow hallway, so I didn’t worry if I had a funny turn, the dancing returned, or Dizzy Dennis visited. 

Shuddering Shoulder Shirley was merely giving the odd twitch now, but I knew she had not finished with me yet.

Waiting for the lift, I got the camera out, ready for when the lift doors opened. I’m glad no one was in it at the time. Haha!

Down to the ground floor. Met and had a few words with Ethel in the lobby. Then through the caretaker’s passage to the bins. Both of the caretakers were there outside, and Steve took the bag from me. A few words, during which Shirley gave them a display of quality Shoulder Shuddering. Which drew looks between the two men, and an “Are yer alright? and frowned foreheads. It’s so embarrassing when someone is nearby when this happens. I said I was fine, thanks. I must have looked a right pillock as I shook my way back inside.

I increased the heat to high in the crock-pot with the potatoes in, and opened a tin of peas and put them in a saucepan. Then, as Shirley was easing off, Duodenal Donald started, a bad do too, supported with a bit of stabbing from Anne Gyna. Ah, well, things had been to calm earlier on, it had to come.

1Mon09aI could find no details about the buses on the website. So asked on Winwood Heights Facebook, if anyone knew about the buses or Poundland store. Hugh ‘thinks’ the L9 is running in a Saturday timetable. If so, That’ll do me.

I decided to take some photos from the balcony. Seemed a good idea at the time.

I got the right side Metal-Spring controlled, that needs the recoiling bit pressed and pulled at the same time to do open it, (potentially lethal, but okay for Winwood Heights old folks to use) with merely a bruised finger and elbow this time. Then took a couple of pictures.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

1Mon19Tried Josie’s door again. No answer.

Tired out and still shaking a bit, I got the nosh prepared. I ate it in an auto-mode, no idea why, but as the concentration gave way to fatigue, I’m sure I enjoyed it.

Wash the pots up, and as the dying sunshine 1Mon23blasted its last beams on earth, I got the camera and tried to take a decent shot of the scene.

It dawned on me then, I can’t remember using the Porcelain Throne today? But being in the languorous, lackadaisical, lethargic state of mind I was in, I wasn’t sure or certain of anything.

I’m not sure what happened for the next half-hour or so, I sort of came-back into focus as I was in the £300, second-hand, c1968 recliner, with my legs up high on the old swivel chair, and deep in thought about tomorrows plans to get out to town on the bus. Then I remembered that this will not be possible, I’d forgotten about Jenny’s helping me out ordering stuff for me, it’s being delivered Tuesday. Hey-ho! As much as I was looking forward to getting out, for some reason, this did not bother me? Maybe, I had underlying fears of going out after so many weeks lodged in the flat?

I soon found that Sweet Morpheous was uninterested in letting me get any rest. The Thought-Storms began, tormenting me with memories that I hadn’t recalled for years. I’d guess it was gone midnight by the time I finally managed to nod of.

Hey-ho!

Inchcockski – Saturday 30th May 2020: I Whinged, whinged and whinged today. Sorry!

May30

2020 ttttMay30

Saturday 30th May 2020

Dutch: Zaterdag 30 Mei 2020

00 May 30 mix

GM 100.100.15002:30hrs: I woke, the brain caught me up, and the sound of the annoying ‘Hum’ all around was a bit louder than of late – but, no time for that – Wee-wee-William was wanting to be freed!

Getting my unhealthy, aged, gargantuan oversized-stomached decrepit, body from the recliner and onto my feet, was no easy matter this morning.  But apart from Arthur Itis’s knees, the overgrown toenails, the ankle ulcer, the leg ulcer, Harold’s Haemorrhoids and Anne Gyna, there was little bothering. Hehehe!

I limped over to the EOGPB (Emergency-Overnight-Grey-Plastic-Bucket), and painfully proceeded with passing a WSSUGG (Weak-Squirty-Spraying-Uncontrollable-Greeny-Grey) wee-wee! It still confuses me, how overnight, I cannot remember struggling out of the recliner at all, let alone hobbling over to the bucket or and using it, but it was half-filled? Ah, the mysterious wonders of Woodthorpe Court: The Ghosts, Hobgoblins, Boll-Weevils, Aliens, Gremlins, Karakia-cursing entities, hallucinations. Materialisations, poltergeist, lemures, wairuas, kehuas, manifestations that permeate, pass through the pores and interstices of space, through the time-continuum. Usually, without rupture or displacement within the building. To cause havoc, fear and frustration, as they dislodge time itself, in their aspirations and skulduggery, to complete their given by Satan, ‘Let’s Piss-off Inchcock’ mission?

6Sat01As I entered the kitchen, I thought I’d photograph the view of the new, unwanted, thick-framed, unliked, letting-rain-in, designed by a nasty, foul, cruel photographers-hating designer. That has been deliberately modelled so that no handicapped or elderly camera-user can take a photograph of Chestnut Walk below, without risking life and limb to climb the stepladder to see what he is shooting. Inevitably causing injury, upsetting Arthur Itis, Anne Gyna, Dizzy Dennis, or Back Pain Brenda. Toe-stubbing and falling off of the ladder is something that will no doubt please the architect or whatever Satanistic nerd, who planned the layout. But it doesn’t bother me! I fear a niggly-period just might be coming on, sorry.

6Sat16

Photographed Today!

WD 0.0.255 I got the kettle on. The pot is near the air-vent on the wall that kept falling off, and the wind howling in when I first arrived at the flat. (See Photo right!) A fitter came to have a look at it (in 2016, I think) and booked me in for call two-months later for someone to tackle the problem. A young man arrived as planned to tell me it has been cancelled due to an emergency. ‘Fair enough’, I said, ‘can’t be helped’. I got a letter a week later rebooking the job, for a date three weeks later. A different young man arrived, had a look and soon set about with his foam filler, and plugged the hole. I thanked him, and off he shot, and I went shopping. But it doesn’t bother me!

On my return, I found it just like it is now (Only whiter). WArden Dean called them for me to explain, and I got a booking for a call four-weeks later. A man arrived, agreed it was terrible and needed doing, especially as the foam had covered the electric socket and gone rock-hard. ‘I’ll get it booked in for you’. ‘Thanks, mate’. ‘No problem!’ But it doesn’t bother me!

All this was before I got the ankle and leg ulcers. Then got diagnosed with the Peripheral Neuropathy, (dying nerve-ends). Had to use the walking stick and/or the walker-guide. But it doesn’t bother me!

Then they rushed me into the hospital when I collapsed in the recliner, nothing found wrong? Then weeks later, I had the stroke! Spent six weeks in the stroke ward, then another four in a care home. Got back here, the right ankle giving way, dropping stuff, walking into things, collapsing with dizzies and Anne Gyna was confirmed as a new ailment for me. Then diagnosed as diabetic. But it doesn’t bother me!

The plastic cover still drops off now and then. The socket flashes with static. But no rush, I’ll be a goner soon, then it will be easier for them to mend things when I’m not in the way. ready for the next tenant. But it doesn’t bother me!

And now, five years later, I’ve given up all hope of getting an appointment to get the kitchen made-safe and cleaned up, and I am in no state to do it myself. But it doesn’t bother me!

Touch of self-pity and frustration crept in there big time, sorry again!

6Sat02Made the brew, did the medicalisationing. The sys had crept back up a bit. The pulse, too, but I think it’s within the range. But it doesn’t bother me!

Got Computer Cameron on, and made a needed graphic. Then started on updating the Friday blog. Thins went reasonable well, ailment-wise!

Got it completed and sent off to WordPress. Emailed the links. Pinterested a while. Had a long, but enjoyable bash on TFZer and Winwood Heights Facebooking’s. Visited the WordPress Reader section. Then, off to get the ablutions done.

Farcicalisation comes to mind. It was to be just a stand-up job, else I might miss the Iceland delivery (A farce in itself, tell you about further on) and it was too early to use the shower anyway. But as you will see, things didn’t go according to plan!

6Sat04WD 0.0.255 The first thing, I found, was that I needed the Porcelain Throne to be utilised! Boy, had Constipation Konrad made a comeback! Agano would not be too a severe word to describe what I went through, or rather, what went through me! Hahaha! I thought it was going to be one of those grinding marathon sessions again, I got the crossword 6Sat03book out. But things fooled me, all of a sudden, things moved of their own accord… I had visions of my body being found, split into two halves! Blimus, the most hurtful evacuations ever! But it doesn’t bother me!

Silver-Lining Search Result: At least if I could rush the cleaning up, I could still have time to sort the black backs to the chute before the Iceland van arrived. The feet didn’t look too bad, but the discomfort was!

WDPMay31WD 0.0.255 The gums were bleeding, I got a bit too enthusiastic in my rushing the brushing. Tsk! The dropsies weren’t too bad, mind. The razors had a few flying off trips. The three shaving cuts were spread about. When I tried to cut the hairs behind the ear lobes, one nick on each side, and when I caught one, yes, caught one razor, as it shot out of my other hand, I sliced a tiny bit of of my finger end. Damned bad luck at the end, I dried, deodoranted and dressed, and Dizzy Dennis paid me a call, as I was going through the door, clouting my right shoulder on the frame.

6Sat05WD 0.0.255 Now, this has kicked Shuddering Shoulder Shirley into action! Which is currently making typing a bit of a task. But it doesn’t bother me! I’m fed-up listening to myself moaning. A closer look at the toes and feet in the front room showed that the ulcer had died down a lot, far less inflamed. The nails need attention, I must ask Deana if she can ring the clinic for me on Monday.

I got the waste bags made up, and took the three to the waste chute on the walker-guide trolley. Both lifts are now working as well. Although not in use.

6Sat05a

WD 0.0.255 Back to Cameron, and on WordPressing. Half-an-hour or so later, the Intercom rang. I limped to the panel, and it was not working! I got the feeling, that if I was to snuff-it soon, the other tenants might hold a long-distance party… I feel sure my abysmal luck is spreading throughout the fabric of the building! What next is going to break-down?

6Sat10It was the Iceland driver, bless him, he kept trying to ring, but there was no response to the accept button, and the screen did not show anything or any voices heard. I gt a jacket on, to rush down (rush? hahaha! I am a fool!). But the door chimed out, someone had let the bloke in. He told me that a colleague of his could not get in earlier either! As I said, what next? The lad left the stuff near the door and shot off, he didn’t look too happy, and I don’t blame him.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

The freezer and fridge were chockablock now! I got some of the Jersey Royal new potatoes in the slow-cooker, added some Hickory flavouring.

6Sat24Then back on Cameron, starting this post off. After three hours or so, and the same amount of SFRTFC (Strong-Forceful-Reluctant-To-Finish-Cloudy) wee-wees, I got one of the Rocket Sours iced lollies from the freezer, and started to suck it vigorously! Lovely-jubbly! No taste to it mind, but it was cold and fizzy, highly acceptable! If this heat stays with us, I can’t see these lollies lasting long. Hehe!

The thermometer gave a reading of 34c indoors. I’m sure it must have been hotter outside. I took what was left of the sucker with me out into the balcony, which I thought was a good idea, to open a window and take some shots of the divine weather…

WDPbbsDWD 0.0.255A I went arse-over-tip on the first step over the raised door gliders! And what a kerfuffle!

WD 0.0.255 I put my hands out in front of me to lessen the fast-arriving im[act with the wooden slated running boards… the iced lollipop disappeared the slats, never to be seen again! I instinctively tried to grab between the gaps, and I got a splinter in the same finger I’d sliced with the razor earlier… But it didn’t bother me!

WD 0.0.255 Then, the Herculean task of getting back up again, which was handicapped by my trousers falling down! You couldn’t make it up! I was more bothered about anyone seeing me in this pickle than the pains I was in! Gluglegnatsworth!

Stil on my aching stinging knees, I crawled out of view back into the flat. What are the odds of someone seeing this little contretemps from another balcony? I cringed at the thought!  But it doesn’t bother me!

WD 0.0.255A I got myself sorted out. Getting back on my feet awkwardly, and banging the right knee and stubbing a toe! Cribblebogangonies! But it didn’t bother me!

It seemed that the braces had become unclipped during the tumble. I bravely tried to look nonchalant, and got the camera and wandered (Carefully!), back out to the balcony. I got the camera and scanned all the balcony’s in view, but didn’t see anyone in their p[od. (Fingers crossed) I took some shots of the folks below.

6Sat19

6Sat17WD 0.0.255 I must have caught the selector-wheel, cause one came out a different size and shape than the other? This dog above on the left is the one I names ‘Yappy’. His bark could be heard by me, all the way up here on the 12th-floor, and without my hearing aids in! I took a picture of the housing straight ahead. It looked almost like a painting? But the sunshine of strong in reality, but not in the resulting photo?

I took a photo of the puff clouds, and wallowed in the sunshine, leaning against the sharp edges on the balcony windows, and began to feel someone settled, almost at peace with the world. The warmth, the lack of breeze, and sounds of dogs and kids, but no vehicles… It felt so good to just relax…

6Sat22

Of course, the landline burst into sounds and flashes! No blooming rest for the wicked! I got back in, still moving wearily, and it was Sister Jane on the line. They (The Hospital) were keeping Pete in, ready for another biopsy by a specialist on Tuesday I think she said.

He’s got a television supplied and a laptop, they bring him newspapers when he wants one, has a choice of meals and is in a sideward with just two beds! But, it doesn’t bother me! In the stroke ward, it was packed solid with patients, some on trolleys, often I didn’t get a meal at all, the night staff always came and opened the window wide, which was right next to my bed, and they threw me out three weeks too early cause they needed the bed for an emergency. The ambulance staff threw me in a wheelchair, and left some of my stuff behind, but took some belonging to the chap in the next bed with me! I got put in a care home, full of patients who were not fully with it. Even there, one day, I didn’t get fed! Attempted stabbing, fights, I had to make a witness statement to the police… But it didn’t bother me! I’m not jealous, oh, no!

Jesting aside, (Not that the above incidents are not genuine!) I bet poor old Pete is bored rigid in hospital. His arm is deflating, so he even has no pains to distract. He’s always been an active bloke and is not too keen on medical institutions. I wonder if I dare nip out to see him? No, I’d better not. Knowing my luck the trousers would drop down in the sideward. Hahaha!

6Sat25WD 0.0.255 Nosh time. Bit of a heavy load, but I ate it all up. Not that it was very good, though. The garden peas were alright. Taste Rating: 5/10.

Got the pots pans and me washed up.

I got down earlier than ever, to watch some TV, with the aim of nodding off and getting caught up with some sleep.

WD 0.0.255 Fat Chance! The ticker was racing away, the Thought Storms attacked, and after a few hours of failing to get to sleep, I couldn’t even manage any nod-off moments, plenty of rising for a wee-wee episode, mind. I decided to get back up and get Computer Cameron going to update this blog. And of course, escape the thought-storms.

WD 0.0.255 Well, pickle my walnuts! My luck-status was confirmed!

Virg 255

So many things have bought injustices, jealousies and failures on my behalf today, I’m sick of my own whinging! All the lights were out on the Virgin box. I went through the usual procedures; pressed the reset button – Nope! Turned of the computer and rebooted – Nope! Turned off the power to everything, restarted computer and the Liberty-Global Virgin Media box, Nope! Things looked bleak!

6Sat28I went for a drink of orange juice, the evening horizon looked worthy of photographicalisationing, so I did! For some reason, this shot reminded me of a Clint Eastwood Italian Western.

WD 0.0.255 Still no Liberty-Global Virgin Media, but the box was actually now flashing two lights!

I went on to CorelDraw, and made up a Coronavirus Humour Graphic. This took about an hour to get done. Hello, three lights on Liberty-Global Virgin Media box now, things are looking up! I saved the graphic to the hard drive for later use and had another wee-wee (The orange tint was back).

Aha, four of the five Liberty-Global Virgin Media lights on now. So, I tried again to access the web… Great! I’m in! Slow going, but still!

I found the latest figures for Nottingham. These facts were being published regularly, but now they are hidden in sub-texts and different sections. Likely a Government ploy, as the figures are still rising overall, but now, in Nottingham anyway, more deaths in care homes, more than in Hospitals for the first time. Huh, I’m a  cheer-chappie today, ain’t I?

3Wed16

Got on with the updating of this blog again. Then went back on CorelDraw to see if I could find inspiration for more graphics to use.

WD 0.0.255 Harrumph! I give up trying to sleep cause I just can’t do it, and now I find myself falling asleep at the computer!

I went on Facebooking for a while.

I’d better get this finished off, checked and posted.

Inchcockski – Sat 23 May: Bleak thoughts abounded, depression surrounded, the howling-wind sounded. Hey-Ho!

May23

2020 ttttMay23

Saturday 23 May 2020

Maori: Tarei 23 Mei 2020

00 May 23 Eve

May TFZers

Gm2purp0402:50hrs: Woke finding I had a touch of involuntary Clinomania. I must have nodded off five or six times, waking, nodding repeatedly. On the final awakening, the need for my use of the Porcelain Throne was made apparent, and a smidge of panic overcame me; with the belief that I would never make it to the bowl on time. Yet another change in circumstances, Trotsky Terence had retaken control over the innards!

The rigmarole of freeing my scarily-obesely stomached body from the recliner to the wet room was a rushed, bloody, painful and difficult excursion. (Little Inchies fungal lesion was flowing the red stuff)

WD 100.20.0 Things activated, by Trotsky Terence, I had no in part how things went, the moment I got seated. All over in seconds, but a mess like never before had to be sort and cleaned afterwards. The cistern did not cope with clearing things and had to be flushed a few times, and buckets of water added, to assist it! Cor Blimey, worra struggle!

WDP 03dWD 100.20.0 I was left with an acute stomach ache after the evacuation. But there was was no signs of it before. Grigglebogblowit! The cleaning and medicating of Little Inchies fungal lesion brought tears to my eyes! Tsk!

I hobbled to the kitchen, thinking how the feet and toes didn’t seem so bad this morning? I got the kettle on, and Dizzy Dennis paid me a visit, but no Whoopsies or Accifauxpas caused.

WD 100.20.0 I got the medications out and realised I’d not taken last night’s doses, (Well, I never, what a shock, me Forgetting something? Hehehe!) So I took them, and made a point to try and remember to take the morning ones belatedly, later on. During the ten-minutes or so that I was in the kitchen, I had to utilise the GPEB (Grey-Plastic-Emergency-Bucket), twice! Both were of the HLSBS (Hosepipe-Like-Short-Blasting-Splashback) style. I took the bucket with me to the computer, confident that it would be needed again soon. No doubt about it, the intestines were going to make me suffer today, with Trotsky Terence, and now Wee-Wee Willy going into overdrive!

6Sat01I sat to get the computer going, and two things registered with the grey-cell box. The feet and toes started stinging ‘after’, I’d sat down and taken my weight off of them? Secondly: The volume of the annoying mystery ‘Hum’ from outside, as so loud, I got up and checked to see if the fire brigade had an engine going outside!

6Sat04

As I stepped into the balcony pod, I heard the windows rattling, and yet there didn’t seem much wind when I opened one to take the Chestnut Walk shot, the ‘Hum’ was viciously powerful!

WD 100.20.0 Then I needed another Wee-wee! This one was a tad different. Of the STSBDWTE (Slow-To-Start-But-Didn’t-Want-To-End) variety. Again, after the release, the stomach began to sting and rumble?

I made-up the template, then made a start on this blog, thus far. Then began updating the Friday blog. Which, in between taking a variety of frequent types and colour-moded wee-wees, I got finished! Despite Shoulder-Shuddering Shirley doing her best to delay me. Naughty Shirley!

I Pinterested some photos, went on the WordPress reader, then on TFZer and Winwood Heights Facebooking. Another wee-wee, and off to get the stand-up Ablutions sorted out.

WDPC6Sat05What an absolutely cheer-making, super-duper, crackerjack, unbelievable, corking, almost bleeding, Whoopsiedangleplop and Accifauxpa-free session!

Colin Cramps kicked off as I began to get the soaking flannel out of the sink. But even this only lasted a few minutes, and he was off and gone! Smugness Mode Coming On! 

WDPbbsBCleaning the teeth, I began to think that I had slipped back in time somehow, and did not have the stroke, Peripheral Neuropathy, Toothache, Shuddering Shoulder Shirley, Ane Gyna, Reflux Roger or Shaking Shaun at all!

None of these bothered me for the duration of the ablutions! Definitely a Smug-Mode Approaching!

WDPH01LThe teeth cleaning was completed without any droppings, or gum bleeding! Fair enough, the shaving did bring a few of both, but still just two knicks and three razor dropsies. The washing of the skinny limbed, whacking great flobby-bellied torso and legs as far as I could reach, produced only one minor bruise. I dropped the soap and clouted my head on the sink as I went down to retrieve it. You can’t win ’em all!

The drying off went without any bother, nothing knocked over, no Dennis Dizzies or Nicodemus’s nerve-end use loss! (Come on, I must be either dead or dreaming this!)

WDP 2Now, when it came to the medicating, I was expecting the ailments to produce painful, pestering-predicaments and perhaps the odd agonistic moment. But, No! Even Little Inchies removal of the crusted blood, produced next to no blood when the usually horrendously hurtful applicating of the Daktacort was done, there was hardly any stinging at all! I wanted to cry with joy, laugh out loud… But how can this happen? To me, with my luck? Better make the most of it, I thought!

WDP 20193AWD 100.20.0 Then, and it had to happen. Getting the PPs on, I lost my balance, went over backwards, bounced off of the door, and fell on the shower chair and Sock-Glide! I let myself get overconfident with all the none accidents happening? Getting back up, was at that time, an impossibility. The back of the head and right shoulder took most of the impact, but I soon realised I could not get to the wristlet alarm to call for help, at least for a while until I regained my equilibrium. (Is that the right word? I’ll look it up later)

However, minutes later things, well I did, felt much better, and I was glad I couldn’t get to the alarm. Calling for help and not needing it, ‘Crying-Wolf’ is not a good thing to commit. As things came together, I realised I could have reached the picker-upperer (That Jenny donated to me when I broke my other one, Tsk!), I keep it in the wet room, and from where I lay, could have used it to get the wristlet. (I’m glad I didn’t think of it earlier).

I did use it, to grab the walking stick, and in a bit of a messy Heath Robinson style, and after some faffing about, I got back up to a semi-perpendicular stance.

6Sat05aAmazingly, the miracles of this morning had not finished. For after cleaning up the chair and glide, and checking myself over, the only part of my anatomy giving me any real grief was the shoulder, and both Duodenal Donald and Anne Gyna had kicked off. Could have been so much worse! The legs were fine, although the feet and toes were stinging.

I wondered for a moment, had all the ailments got together, and agreed to lay-off of me this morning, on purpose? To get me into a confident mood it which I’d leave myself open for a guaranteed Whoopsiedangleplop? Hehehe! Only kidding about thinking that. Well…

I think I will check to see if I can6Sat08 pay for, if available, a fully waterproof wristlet alarm, that I can wear when washing or showering, just in case this happens again. Off to the kitchen, and took this photograph of the beautiful sky outside. I think I’ve been lucky this morning, and there can’t be a lot of it left. The wind is terrible again, howling!

6Sat09I made a brew and remembered to do the morning medications I’d forgotten about earlier. I think the HP readings were good, considering what I’d just gone through. The thermometer worked for once, showing a 33.3° I must say the tastes nice in these mugs that Jenny gave me ♥.

6Sat11Back to the computer, Duodenal Donald calming down now.

I got an email from Iceland, telling me to check the email to see changes. So, I did. There was only the Wholemeal Deli Rolls that will be short-delivered, and I have no worry over that.

6Sat10I checked on the Amazon email. Now it tells me that the Clementine juice is expected to be delivered twixt today and Tuesday? No tracker on it, though? Suspicions aroused! But I can go to the site on Wednesday for a refund? Mmm?

6Sat12The intercom rang, luckily I was on my way for yet another wee-wee, and I heard it. T’was the Iceland delivery arriving.

I nipped to the window and took this shot of the van, I’ve no idea why, but it seemed worth it at the time?

6Sat13The chap arrived, and asked me how I put up with all the noise? Which confused me a tad. I got the bags into the kitchen. In there, I realised what he was talking about with the noise. Someone is drilling something somewhere close by. But it didn’t sound too loud to me, of course since the chap mentioned it, I hear it all the more. Hehehe!

6Sat18aThere seemed a lot of things on that order. So, I went through them and soon realised I was going to have problems with getting all the items in the freezer. And a bit of ingenuity was going to be needed if I was to get them into the available space.

I had to take some products out of their boxes, to free-up some space. The orange lollies, the quarter-pounder beefburgers, (already in the freezer), and the Whitefish fillets in crispy batter.

This was a messy and fiddly job. The worst part of it, I had to throw away a half-packet of Sweet potato fries to make enough space for the incoming food. But, I thought it was a good idea, and felt semi-proud of my resourcefulness in the cunning plan.

As you can see in the picture, the refrigerator and freezer could take no more.

There was not even room to get one more lollipop in! So I ate it! Hahaha!

In the bottom drawer, I felt the bag of Petit Pois slit as I crammed it into the corner.

Odds are, I’m going to forget this, and in a couple of days, I’ll go into this freezer and just grab at them, and have a right mess on my hands to clear up? Mind you, I might remember… nae, no chance!

I reckon the noise that’s just started again will be Herbert. It’s start-stop with long periods of grinding. I wonder what he’s making?

The next photo is one I accidentally took not knowing. Haha!

I turned my attention to the fridge items next, and there were only a few of them. Chicken thighs, that spread, got to be butter, but it’s not, pork and pickle mini-pork pies and some Richmond skinless sausage. I only ordered these, cause I’d not seen any for ages, and it’s been many years since I ate any.

Then I got the bits in the cupboards. Instant mash with cheese and chives, mint bikkies, Cheesy Cheddar biscuits, black waste bags and kitchen towels. I also ordered (apparently), a bag of ‘Wasabi Assorted Nibbles’, whatever they are.

6Sat20If anyone in the flats would like them, first come, first given. I’ll take a photo of them, so you know what they are. Hang on a tick! Here they are.

I don’t know what I meant to order, but not these. Judging by the ingredients, they might be too spicy for my tastes. Wasabi peas (40%) Whatever they are? Starch, sugar, salt, Chilli, Horseradish, Garlic, Glucose, Capsicum and many more on the packet label. I’ll hang onto them for a few days. I don’t like throwing food away, but they are not my cup of tea, I’m sure.

6Sat19I got things cleared and went to go back on the computer, I opened the balcony door, which proved to be a bad idea. The wind howled through from balcony to the kitchen; or the other way around. I thought I’d better close the kitchen windows, they were only just ajar. I had to laugh, even if I hit my poorly shoulder on the door frame, when the kitchen roll on the dispenser, hit me in the face! Har-har! Blown by the wind! Fortunately, there was not much of roll left, but the wind had unwound all of it.

And I read about people who are getting bored with their isolating? I could do with a bit of bored! Giggle-laugh!

6Sat20The injured shoulder was getting a bit more bothersome, so I made a brew, and took an extra Codeine 60mg. I’ll skip the evening one, don’t want to take too many.

I pondered over what to have for nosh later. After much differing, procrastination and faffing about, I decided on battered fish on the bread rolls, with tomatoes, a lemon mousse to follow, then maybe even, an orange sucker? By gum, I lead a good life!

6Sat21Back again top the computing. The warm williwaw winds were still howling. I shut the balcony door, but could still hear it. It must be bad for anyone with good hearing.

I tended to getting the fish cooked for the roll sarnies.

WD 100.20.0 Oh, very dearie me! Taking the tray of fish out of the oven, Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters let me down, and I dropped the tray. Boggleknappers! I pushed my body forwards, trapping the tray between my stomach and the oven… amazingly, more worried about losing the battered fish than any injury.

WD 100.20.0 ac I grabbed at the few fish lumps from the floor to retrieve them, hitting my already injured shoulder against the stove. Inspected the food, and decided it would do, and began to put the salvaged fodder on the plate… Argh! The message had belatedly got through to the brain, that I had burnt my wobbly-over-fleshed tummy! Hahaha!

Got the Germolene in action. I’ll take a photo later (I did, but not until the morning).

6Sat24WD 100.20.0 In the melee, I forgot about taking the evening med’s Klutz! I was more interested in the delightful looking feast awaiting my attentions on the plate! I had a borborygm on me. Battered Basa fish balls, and Whiting fillets in crispy batter. All I had with them was tomatoes and some white cobs.

ClementineA can of the San Benedetto, Prima Sremitura Clementina drink. What a mouthful! Haha!

I watched an old (1996) Euro football match, twixt England and Spain. It was very depressing, realising than Englan still play in the same, error-ridden style nowadays. Well, they will I hope, after the, and if the Coronavirus is beaten.

I kept nodding off, of course. And boy, did I have a thirst on me! During the match, I drank the Clementina and two bottles of made-up spring water and orange cordial. Then fetched a drink of milk from the fridge!

I did the pots. The wind was still blowing heavily, as I turned off the computer, and got settled in the second-hand, c1968, not working, broken by Zyrophobia suffering, supercilious Brother-in-law Pete, when flat-searching, finding and taking my valuables. At the same time, I was the hospital after the stroke, and the thought storms began.

7Sun04cI’d got a thin quilt over my naked, anaemic, ailment tortured, aching, phenomenally heavy and flobby-stomached body. But it had to come off, the fibre on the material was catching of the overgrown Howard Hughes-like painful toenails.

WD 100.20.0 6Sat28But thankfully, my growths are not that bad… yet! I must try again to find someone to cut the nails for me. I’ll inquire (if I can get an answer this time), at the Sherwood Health Centre on Elmswood Gardens to see if they are open for feet treatment again after the lock-down.

WD 100.20.0 I spent ages trying to get-off to kip. But eventually did… but had to keep getting up for wee-wees!

Globdangleristions!

Inchcock Today – Friday 22nd May 2020: Confusion and befuddlement mostly today

May22

2020 ttttMay22

Friday 22nd May 2020

Luxembourgish: Freideg 22 Mee 2020

00 May 22 Sandie

TFZer: Tree House Sandie Lentz ♥

GM L 0.0.130bl02:35hrs: Once again, I awoke, with a vagueness, an opacity of thought. Yet within a few moments, lucubrations started forming, plans laid and made, ideas considered within my grey-cells. My clinomania encouraged me to remain laid there, on the recliner. Thinking, planning, but without any logicality or precision. Which didn’t last for very long though.

I felt the cold draft coming in from the balcony door I had left open. The brain reckoning stopped. The need to escape the warm clutches of the quilt, and get up to close the door took priority. I was being sensible and taking my time in getting up, but the cool breeze, made me throw caution to the wind. I was fortunate in getting up, grabbing the four-pronged walking stick, making my way to the door and shutting it to, then needing an urgent wee-wee! All, without any toe-stubbings, dizzies or knocking over anything from the Ottoman! Smug-Mode-Adopted!

WD 0.0.0 (1) To the wet room and had a totally different style of wee-wee this morning. A first, a new style! Oh, yes! A PAVCT (Painful-And-Various-Coloured-Trickling) wee-wee! Amazing, it started off orange, then cream, and the last few trickles 5Fri02were a cloudy-grey! Crunggleisations!

WD 0.0.0 (1) I did notice the right-knee seemed to have gone out of sync, deformed a bit? But, t’ was of little concern, as there was no pain from it, apart from the Arthur Itis usual. Then I thought, are NN’s (Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters) out of actions again, not passing the nerve-ends messages to the brain, and will I get electric-shock like pains if it does belated get the information across? Tsk! 

WD 0.0.0 (1) Perhaps, it could be a dirty-great giant alien worm lava, whose egg had been laid in my body, and was fighting his way out? Or a mutation of the Coronavirus? Maybe NN’s have died altogether, I have multiple broken bones, and don’t know it because the neurotransmitters are kaputt? Hahaha!

And to think, the Government is working to keep people busy so they don’t get bored being stuck at home, Hah! Never get time for a dull moment here!

Ah, my uneducated but fertile mind kicked into silly-gear: If there is a way to pass on Peripheral Neuropathy to folks, then let them have a stroke, and they will not be bothered about the virus then. They’ll have enough on their plate just getting through day-to-day? And, what am I ranting on about?

5Fri03Off to the kitchen, and got my breakfast. The BP Sys was down from yesterday, which was encouraging.

WDP 002WD 0.0.0 (1a) I was washing the mugs and mixing bowl in the sink, and got a visit from Shoulder Shuddering Shirley. Which moved my arm under the running hot water tap – the nerves were working then, cause it made me jump, and whip my arm away from the water; hitting the back of my hand on the corner of the bread bin. Broggleknockersworth!

To the computer, and made up a template. Then started to update the Thursday blog. Got the post sent off, emailed the link and went on Pinterest. Stopped to make a brew. Back to the computer, onto the comment section on WordPress. Tim Price informed me that he’s had a link talk to someone at WordPress, and they are going to force the new block editor on everyone. But there should be a way within the programme’s workings, of going back to the old editor. Ha! Me, learn how to do that?

Then I spent an inordinately long time on TFZer Facebooking, happily! Then set off to get the ablutions done.

5Fri04WD 0.0.0 (1) The need for the Porcelain Throne arrived. The evacuation was similar to the last two days ones. Start, blocked, do the crossword book, suffer the pain, appreciated it when things start again, and finish the session, with an exclamation of pain and relief!

5Fri05WD 0.0.0 (1) I did spot some new blood spots or papules on the left leg as I was crosswording. Ah, the mysterious wonders of Woodthorpe Court. The ghosts, hobgoblins, boll-weevils, aliens, gremlins, karakia-cursing entities. The materialisations, poltergeist, lemures, wairuas, kehuas, and manifestations. That permeate, pass through the pores and 5Fri06interstices of space, through the time-continuum. Usually, without rupture or displacement within the building. To cause havoc, fear and frustration, as they dislodge time itself, in their aspirations and skulduggery, to complete their given by Satan, ‘Let’s Piss-off Inchcock’ mission? 

Hey-ho!

5Fri007cHowever, not-withstanding and apart from that, the ablution session was one of the best for months! One knick shaving, only five dropsies, and three of them were the min-soap tablet. No stubbed toes, not knocking anything off of the floor cabinet… no sorry, I did knock off the Daktacort cream, sorry about that inaccuracy. Olive oiled the ear-drums, Germoloided the piles, and Saccades Sandra’s drops in the eyes. Washed the spectacles, and went through the unpleasurable, delicate, always painful job, of treating Little Inchies fungal lesion

I got myself smelling half-decent, medicated things and got some clothes on. I made up two small black waste-bags and hobbled to the chute room with them.

4Thu15Back to the apartment, suddenly remembering I had some of the San Benedetto Prima Spremtura Clementina (Clementine juice) arriving today, 24x 300ml cans. I have to say, I adore the taste. Not too fizzy, not too sweet, but I find them very refreshing.

I looked at the Amazon tracker (right), but it seems like it’s going to be a late delivery, this time. It hasn’t even reached the dispatch yet, let alone out for delivery!

I suppose this means another miserable night for Inchcock! Globberations! I’ll have to not watch telly, cause I have to use the headphones, and cannot hear the Intercom or door chimes when I have them on. So, it’ll mean me staying up and trying to stay awake long enough, and I do get grumpy with myself when I am prevented from sleeping. It’s hard enough to drop off as it is. But, you can be sure tonight, I’ll nod off after staying up so many extra hours waiting for the cans to arrive. Still, serves me right for ordering them. Hahaha! Grumblegollocks!

I’ve still got a few left in the fridge if anyone fancies popping over? Tsk! Oh, I forgot, I’m not allowed visitors, cause of my High-Risk status! Clapbogsworthyness!

Ah, well, I’d better get on with doing some more graphicationalisationing then.

5Fri08WD 0.0.0 (1) Gawd, it’s going so slowly, Shoulder Shuddering Sheila, and Dizzy Dennis are the main culprits. Only got three graphics done, and I’m about to give up.

I came across some disturbing news while searching for facts for the blog. Nottingham is bucking the trend on Coronavirus and has had an increase in infection and hospitalisations.

Oh, dear!

5Fri09So late now, but I dare not nod-off, or I may miss the deliveryman. I’ll have a look at the tracker, hang on a sec…

WD 0.0.0 (1) Blimus! It’s not moving at all, over three hours ago, the tracker reads the same! Not even reached the despatch warehouse. No way it’ll get here before 20:00hrs. Gits!

I wish they’d just tell me it’s not going to make it today! But no! Muggins here has to stay up, just in case it does. No chance to listen to the TV or radio. I’m bound to nod off and not know if it has been or not! But if the dispatch is in Leeds, how can they make it tonight? I do not want or need the stuff today. Initially, they told me it would arrive twixt 18th > 20th… I may have got myself in a muddle here, I’ll have a look at the calendar.

5Fri10WD 0.0.0 (1) Well, I made a right cock-up over the dates! Brambackleshittums! Cracklepackers and Blockstooum!

According to the last eta given me, they are due next Thursday, Friday or Saturday?

I’m so confused now, but it definitely says arriving today by 8 PM on the tracker!

I’ve got to stay awake somehow, but fear it will not happen. I wonder if Amazon has made an error somehow? Or, has the lorry broke-down? Or the driver been arrested? Perhaps Aliens have landed fancying a drink?

Just had another decker at the Tracker, still not moved at all. I could spit! Why me every time? I’m not a bad or naughty boy! Hehehe! Sodwrangles!

I just went to put the kettle on, and the trees in the bottom field and along Chestnut Walk, look in danger of being uprooted! So violent was the wind!

Amazon arrived? It was to Thompsons Punjabi tea, 6 boxes! Marvellous!

5Fri13

5Fri09But most confusing. According to the Amazon email, it was the Clementine drinks that should be coming?

I did another tracker check. Obviously, the San Benedetto was not going to arrive. A mistake had been made by someone other than me for once, Amazon!

WD 0.0.0 (1) As I was putting away the tea bags in junk-room-two, Dizzy Dennis caught me out as I was stretching to reach the drawers, and over I went. Luckily, there was not enough room between the boxes that had been waiting five years to get sorted out all over the room, which broke my fall!

WD 0.0.0 (1) As I struggled to get near something solid to support me in getting back up and haul my onerous body from the floor, I could not reach the stick from where I landed. So, crawling through the rubbish to retrieve the stick… I found what I had done several searches for last week, but couldn’t find – Two packets pf Thompsons Punjana tea bags! I did feel a fool! Well, I’m stocked up for life now on the best tea bags in the world (Well, my favourites), Glengettie (Nine packs x80), Glengettie Gold (Two packs x80), and these, the best of the three, Punjana! (Eight packs x80).

5Fri11A perfect overloaded stock, suitable for a sinensophile, come tea-sommelier as me. Hehehe! But the confusion caused by all the wrong indications and dates from Amazon’s emails will probably mean I won’t live long enough to drink them all. But, I’ll do me bestest!

Got some Hickory in the beans and franks in each saucepan. There had to be something wrong with the new Hickory, and I soon found out what it was. It states clearly that a good shaking of the bottle is needed before use every time.

WD 0.0.0 (1) Well, the seal and cap on the bottle leaked when I shook it! Shame, cause it is a great tasting flavouring. It didn’t half take some getting off of my hands though. It went on the jammie bottoms and stomach too. Tsk!

5Fri14Nosh at last. Baked beans and German Franks with Hickory, a few mini-tomatoes, three small slices of bread, a lemon mousse and the Clementine drink for afters.

Taste-Rating: 9.2/10 Highly acceptable!

I got the pots soaking afterwards and settled down to a disturbing evenings rest. I wasn’t sure if the San Benedetto would or should be arriving, so I tried to stay awake a little longer…

ZZZ!

Inchcock – Thurs 21 May 2020: Intimidated by inscrutableness, insanity and indetermination. Hehehe!

May21

2019 Tnov 03

Thursday 21st May 2020

Croatian: Četvrtak, 21 Svibnja 2020

00 May 21 Eve

GM 0.30.0WD 0.45.0 03:10hrs: Cor blimey, what a topsy-turvy shambolic, fragmented, state of mind I woke-up in! Thought-Storming, one second I was full of hope and confidence, another thought path, and I was down and dejected. Fears and worries floated into the grey-cells, and apprehensions took the lead. My doubts, insecurity, then self-consciousness ruled the roost. All these emotions seemed to be fulgurating, fighting for superiority over each other in my temporarily warped brain? Maybe I had been having a bad dream? I cannot remember.

WDP 3dLNot exactly like magic, but suddenly, as the need for a wee-wee arrived, a clarity of sentience and semi-lucidity returned, and the diurnal battle to get out of the £300, second-hand, c1968, not working, rickety recliner began. And I won, hands down this morning! Sanctimonious-Mode-Adopted!

There was no toe-stubbing, no dropping back into the chair, no loss-of-balance, no knocking anything off of anywhere. Saccades Sandra, Duodenal Donald, Reflux Roger, no Dennis Dizzy bother either. With a distinctive swagger of the head, I made my way to the wet room.

Please don’t think things were pain-free; they haven’t been that since the Stroke. Arthur Itis, the feet and toes, and Anne Gyna were making sure I suffered this morning. Might as well see the funny-side, Hahaha!

WD 0.45.0 As I got in the door, the need for the Porcelain Throne arrived. I thought urgently, so down on the raised plastic seat… I passed the wee-wee of an LDSSM (Long-Dribbling-Spraying-Splashing-Marathon) variety. But the evacuation from the rear, yet again back in full control Constipation Konrad, went back to the part-4Thu10release, a blockage, and just sit in agony waiting for the motion to restart! Silver-Lining-Found: The crossword book was utilised, and despite the ‘I think-I-might-burst-open pains, I got a few clues answered. When the evacuation restarted, at the behest and control of Constipation Konrad, the pinnacle-of-pain was endured. Eyaabuggerit-Gargh!

4Thu01I will have to ring the surgery to ask for advice over these repetitively, and harrowing episodes on the Throne. I got things cleaned up and medicated. New PP’s on, off to the kitchen. Silver-Lining-Found: Not so much bleeding as I had anticipated from Harold’s Haemorrhoids.

At least the plates and toes were looking less inflamed. Still, stinging, of course, and very pale again. No doubt, the Silver-Lining Found here, was the reduction in the Clopidogrel-allergy scars and lumps.

4Thu02I got a sachet of Macrogol powders ready. Took the sphygmomanometer readings: Sys 157 (a little high perhaps?) Dia 79, Pulse 71, and the temperature just showed up as ‘High’ on the not working-right, thermometer. Made brew of Glengettie tea, injected the hypo of Enoxaparin then took the medications for breakfast.

4Thu03aWhile pottering around, I made a graphic with the new donated mugs, that I named during the Porcelain Throne marathon. The old plain white one as well. Why you ask?

The answer to that; would be plain and simple bonkersness! I’m losing it again. Hehe!

4Thu03I checked the kitchen for taps left on, lights, and the stove was safe.

A few moments later, some drilling and banging started, boy, was it loud and close by! But I could not identify where it came from at that time, it felt like it from all around the flat on the same level?

I started updating the Wednesday blog, and went on the Googlemail checking something, and found an email from Jenny. Hopefully, Morrisons will allow me and have in stock, the tissues for Jenny. Got them on the list though.

4Thu13

4Thu03cI took a photo from the balcony, on the left here. At long last, I got the Wednesday post finished. Emailed the link. Pinterested some snaps. Replied to a massive list of comments (Both of them). Then onto TFZer and Winwood Facebooking. By the time I’d finished, I thought I could my hair growing again. Went on the WordPress reader section.

Then I got a reminder email, from Iceland about the priority hour for orders. So I made one up.

4Thu11WD 0.45.0WD 0.45.0A Then, I tended to my ablutioning duties. As I was cutting my gums and doing the teeth cleaning, the loud drilling noise returned, and it shook the things in the wet room, including me! I had to turn off the radio. Because the combined noise meant that if the Amazon chap arrived with the Hickory delivery or the Nurse for the blood-taking, I wouldn’t be able to hear them when they used the intercom.

Which meant my rushing the cleaning duties a little, causing a few Accifauxpas along the way. I ended up with three cuts to the gums, two nicks shaving, a tumble in the shower and several dropsies. But it could have been worse! Silver-Lining Search Result. Hahaha!

As I was drying off, ready to do the medicationalisationing, the noise stopped for a bit.

4Thu06I’ve no idea why, unless it was the heat and moisture? But, the old Heart Op scares seemed more prominent.

The pins (legs) looked a lot betterer, though. The feet and toes were still bad, I must ask Deana if she knows of any Podiatrists still working.

WD 0.45.0 I nearly dropped the camera when taking the leg shot. With having to use one hand to lift a certain appendage up so it did not show on the photo, and using the other hand to operate the Panasonic, and Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters let me down for the first time today! Unlucky? Me? Yes! But I’m not going to complain, the ailments are not too bad at all, overall.

WD 0.45.0 As I left the wet room, to get some clothes to put on, the landline rang out and flashed! Tsk! I know I’m twelve-floors up, but with the balcony door wide open, one gets the feeling that walking around naked is not a good idea! I answered the phone, and it was Sister Jane. Who, on being advised of my current clothing-not-on status, said she’d ring back later.

WDPh 01WD 0.45.0A Back to the wet room to medicate, and freshen up certain areas of my gargantuanly massive and flobby-bellied body. Put the Saccades Sandra drops in, Olive-oiled the ears, and the noise of the drilling suddenly came back on. I dropped the olive oil pot, and it broke! AS I cleaned the mess up, the drilling stopped again. Humph! Then I Phorpain gelled Arthur Itis’s knees and Craig Cramp’s wrists and as best I could get to them, the ankles.

Now fully clothed, pissed-off, and in pain from Anne Gyna and Duodenal Donald, with all the bending I had to do, I skulked off to the kitchen to make a brew before Jane rang back. The drilling noises started again. So, I took some Codeine 30g, to hopefully ease the pains from the tumble in the shower, and having to get down on my knees and back up to clean the dropped olive oil.

4Thu12I got the Hickory delivery parcel, of two bottles, opened. I hope this brand is strong. The Stubbs one was so expensive. These two bottles cost me £14 quid! But this is chaper than the Stubbs, but that was good… I’m getting tired now and all confused.

4Thu07Silver Lining Search Results: But at least it was a bit of much-needed exercise, I suppose. And the noisy drilling had stopped again. Ee, by gum, worra life!

I took a picture from the kitchen window, one of the beautiful afternoon sky.

4Thu09As I had a perusal of the scene below, I spotted an ambulance on-site, on Chestnut Walk.

WD 0.45.0 Oh, dear! It as parked close toe the EXtra-Care Winwood Court as well. I just hope whatever they are here for, is not anything too serious.

WD 0.45.0 The drilling and banging noise made me jump again as it started off. Sounds like it is coming from Josie’s apartment this time? Certainly somewhere close, anyway.

The landline rang and flashed as Sister Jane rang me back as promised. We had a nice chinwag and laugh for ages. I was a little concerned, cause she didn’t tell me off until she’d been on the phone for twenty minutes. Hahaha! I’ll try to ring her tomorrow.

WD 0.45.0 Then, well into the afternoon now, at long last, eventually, I got started on this diary for today!

4Thu24I had to get some fodder sorted, very late now. Chips of some sort, and ham and tomato breas thins sandwiches sounded a good idea to me.

I soon had the food on the plate, and satiated my allotriophagy. Even though the chips were disappointingly bland, I gave this efforts 6.5/10 for a Flavour-Rating.

I remember washing the pots, and although obviously a lot of things happened afterwards, I can recall nowt until waking up in the mornings, to many signs and clues to guess at what took place.

Worra a life!

Inchcockski – Wed 20 May 2020: An Unglefrogwoggling sort of day. Hehehe!

May20

2020 ttttMay20

Wednesday 20th May 2020

Afrikaans: Woensdag 20 Mei 2020

00 May 20 Julie Fr

TFZer Gardeners

GM BrownL01:00hrs: I stirred from my short, disturbed slumber, finding myself in a perky mood. Unnatural, this was, for elegiac Inchcock.

I slowly worked through my body, assessing where I could, the state of the ailments.

The head: Saccades Sandra was not overly affecting the eye-sight. No headaches. Fair enough!

WD 50.0.0 Neck & Shoulders: The persistent of late, Shuddering Shoulder  Shirley was twitching a bit, I’m not sure if she was dying down from a nocturnal attack, or building up ready for a morning assault. A little dubious about this; hopefully, she’ll not get any worserer. The stiffness from last night in the neck was a lot easier. Silver-Lining?

WD 50.0.0 Arms-Hands-Fingers: The left-hand-side was normal. The right with its Peripheral Neuropathy and stroke side-effects were a twitching elbow. Nicodemus’s dying Neurotransmitters. Had left me with some lack of touch-sensation (I must take care when I go for a wee-wee or make the tea, Hehehe!) Anne Gyna, was giving out some mild spasmodic prodding across the chest, but nowhere near as acute as yesterday. Duodenal Donald was still asleep I think, best not to disturb him. Silver-Lining?

WD 50.0.0 The innards were mildly rumbling. Something brewing in there? Reflux Roger was at full belt from when I first woke-up. I reckon the valve is stuck open at the moment, cause he’s causing a bit of pain, which is unusual. I’m confident once I get a cuppa and bite to eat, things should improve, very acidy taste in the mouth and throat this morning.

Good news, no bleeding from Little Inchies fungal lesion. And no wet and warm feelings from the PPs, regarding Harold’s Haemorrhoids! Fantwonderfulski! Silver-Lining?

Down to the legs, and I stood up to bear the weight of my short-plump-flobby, overly-sized drooping stomached body, on the legs and feet. Argh! The souls of the plates were a lot less painful than they were yesterday morning! Goodski! Silver-Lining?

3Wed02WD 50.0.0 But, Rheumatoid Arthur Itis’s knees were the opposite, grindingly, searingly hurtful. Can’t win ’em all! The old ankle ulcer scar seems to have gotten biggerer overnight? The overgrown toenails were stinging a bit as soon as the weight got onto the legs.

I think the body overall, had a smidge more colour to it, Silver-Lining? Then again, I am colour blind.

WD 50.0.0 Thinking it was a bit nipper this Mittenwoch morning, I put on the thin dressing gown. Then realised I’d left the balcony door wide open all night, so I closed it. Seeing the view outside as I did it, I got the camera, took a shot of the pins (above), before, I took a couple of photos from the balcony.

3Wed05

3Wed06WD 50.0.0A I was so pleased to be able to get back into the balcony to take some photographs. (Thanks, to Obergruppenführer, Prima Ballerina, and Warden Deana) In my excitement, I forgot about the damned metal-spring retaining clip, that needs to be pushed to bend, and pulled to open at the same time. Of course, Nicodemus’s neurotransmitters failed at just the most inopportune moment, and I now have a tiny, but painful blood-blister on my thumb! Arglebonkangony!  

I got carefully, to the wet room for a wee-wee, no demands for the Porcelain Throne yet. Had the EBSC (Energetic-But-Short-Painless-Cloudy) wee-wee, and got the kettle on. Took the medications, olive-oiled the earholes. Rubbed some Phorpain Gel on the knees, and took an extra Codeine 30g, and to the computer.

VirFail01bWD 50.0.0 Botted her up, and the first job, got a template done. Not only did I have to contend with the attentions of nasty-nerd, Nicodemus’s neurotransmitters failing, and Shuddering Shirley, the shoulder shaker, which was so frustrating, but also the Liberty-Global Virgin Media crappy service! (Who pay their I lost hours, the internet kept going down and slow repeatedly. With the ailments causing me to lose more time, in correcting and checking everything so often! Blanglebotherations!

Mike Fries is Chief Executive Officer and Vice Chairman of Liberty Global. This article on his salary, I found on Forbes site.

3Wed07

Telegraph: The boss of Virgin Media owner Liberty Global faces shareholder protests this week after receiving payment and bonuses of more than a quarter of a billion dollars since acquiring the cable operator six years ago. Mike Fries’ total remuneration last year topped $33m (£26m), nearly double the prior year, despite a 40pc slump in the company’s share price. I bet he got more than my 98p interest on his personal account last year!

And still, despite the fortune he gets, (note I didn’t say earns!) he can’t supply a block of Warden-aided apartments in Sherwood Nottingham, with even an imitation of a reliable internet service! I’m not surprised! Just look at him. He’s the appearance of a Mafiosa boss, to me? Mind you, he’s good looking. Haha!

3Wed08Note, the threatening, ‘It’s your fault’ pointing finger? The grand service I had from the then, Richard Branson owned and ran Internet service, is much lamented. It has been crippled and destroyed since Fries mob took it over. But I’m not jealous, oh, no! The saddest part is the service is still better than the one I had when I used BT (British Telecom) years earlier.

Sorry about that, I got carried away a bit there.

Things settled on the internet problems, just the odd going off-line for few seconds every now and then. Humph! I got the update finished at last. Went on the WordPress Reader section. And I made a start on this post.

Got as far as to here, and went on the TFZer Facebooking. Spent an hour and a half on it.

Stopped, put Computer Colette in sleep mode, and went off to get the Ablutions done. Still no signs of needing the Porcelain Throne?

A genuinely successful session, with few Whoopsiedangleplops and Accifauxpas! Yee-Ha! A handful of dropsies, no toe-stubbings and only one nick shaving, and I came across the missing tube of toothpaste (It had somehow dropped of the toilet cistern, under the WC), but I did lose, or couldn’t find the after-shave anywhere? Well pleasing!

3Wed10aI made up the box of recyclable materials, then three bags for the chute.

I used the three wheel-walker guide to carry them to the waste chute room. Dropped them down, and returned to the lift, and down to the caretakers’ room.

3Wed11I had a peep out of the small window in the link passage, that shows part of Woodthorpe Grange Park, at the rear of the building.

Then I dropped the box in the caretaker’s passageway. Had a bit of a struggle to get the door opened on my way back to the lift foyer.

3Wed012aI had a perusal of the notice boards but did not see anything new on them to be of any interest to me.

 Then to the end near the main foyer door. The place was looking a bit tatty, but that’s because of the Coronavirus stopping the upgrading work.

WD 50.0.0 3Wed12 (2)Dizzy Dennis paid me a visit at this point. A bad one, but short-lived, thankfully. Conveniently placed, the wall was utilised for a second or two. Hehehe!

I remained where I was to give things time to get back to normal. Well, I say normal? Hahaha! I turned back and took a shot of the 3Wed13even gloomier looking lift lobby. I entered the main lobby area, knocking my arm against the door frame, uttered a couple of curse-words, and stood still for a few minutes, as I got the feeling that Dizzy Dennis was about to attack again. But just to make me feel a fool, he didn’t.

3Wed14WD 50.0.0 I spotted that the bottle of hand-sanitiser left on wall ledge had been stolen again! I find this disgusting. Whoever is doing it, resident or visitor. Contemptible! But I shouldn’t be surprised, even the bottles supplied at the hospitals are getting nicked! Sick! It destroys your faith in humankind!

3Wed14aWD 50.0.0 I thought for a moment that I saw a mouse in the bare brickwork in the corner of the lobby. But I must have been wrong, on looking closer there was nowhere for a mouse to go.

While I was bent looking, a dirty great-big meat fly flew out. It didn’t half make me jump! Even I had to laugh!

I poddled outside, and blow me down with a feather duster, there were the caretakers near the bin. From a distance, I bored them both rigid with as I nattered and chinwagged on. It must have been tedious enough for the poor devils, but Stuttering Stephanie must have made it worse! I can’t help it, I do love a bit of persiflage, no stopping me after going so long without a good schmooze. Haha!

3Wed15I hobble away, feeling guilty, and spotted some new colourful growth amongst the trees at the end of Chestnut Walk.

Life seemed to be returning, but with ten weeks left yet, of my hospital-enforce isolationing, the feeling was only brief. I was really feeling quite low as I returned into the flat’s foyer. Crigglebogsnot!

WD 50.0.0A Back up to the apartment. I fought my way in with the trolley-walker, taking a bit of skin off of my right knuckle, as I farted about getting the trolley in through the door. Twit!

I got the oven heating, and put a large jar of black bean sauce, with some Hickory and Balsamic vinegar added to it. I aim to get the bacon cooked and into the saucepan of beans to season the bacon with. I’m going to have some sourdough muffins with them.

I got updating this blog as far as here.

I took the cooked bacon out of the oven, added it to the pan of black bean sauce on alow light now.

WD 50.0.0 Then went on the Morrison site, to add Balsamic vinegar to the order that’s in. Well, that went well, they’ve only got some at £20 a bottle! I left it.

I went on Amazon to see what their prices were for balsamic vinegar and Hickory. Bejesus! Look at the prices for Balsamic!

3Wed15a3Wed18I investigated the Hickory costs. Always high, but I can’t find any for sale anywhere else.

This is the cheapest they had on sale. I’ve not tried it before. I just hope it’s tasty enough. Oh, dearie me, I feel I might have made a mistake here! At least it’ll be delivered tomorrow, I hope not too late. This Colgin brand works out a little less pro-rata than the other ones. I hope it proves to be as tasty and well-flavoured.

I’ll get the meal sorted out, now.

An odd-looking bowl of fodder, I must admit. Just bacon and black bean sauce, with only hickory, added. Sourdough muffins, a lemon mousse, a can of San Benedetto Clementine drink and mug of orange juice. A low-cal bar of chocolate nougat.

3Wed19

Strange as it looked, it tasted great! I made muffin sarnies of bacon and beans, regularly dunking. Devouring all of it with coenaculous relish, and degust. Mmm! A flavour rating, of a deserved 8.9/10! Took the evening medications.

I got the pots washed, and got down really early in the £300, c1968, second-hand, rickety, not-working, past-its best recliner, legs up on the swivel chair, watched some TV in between two-minute noddings-off. Nibbled some of the Branston-pickle flavoured Mini-Cheddars. I was soon in the land of nod properly.

Dreaming of certain activities, I used to be young enough and fit enough, and capable to partake in (Carole). It truly felt like it was all really taking place, happening. I was young and most contented, in rhapsody… I was most chagrined to find out it was only a phantasm!

WD 50.0.0 Both of the door chimes rang out the Dusty Springfield tune of, ♫ I only want to be with you ♫. Disappointed in finding out that the dream was not real, I bumble my way up, out of the recliner, fell back down in the chair again, landing on my haemorrhoids and feeling them hurt and bleed. Collected myself and balance, and tried again, grabbed the stick, got the jammie-bottoms on, and limped to the door, feeling the blood trickling down my the inside of my legs. (There’s no doubt about it, old age is daily, more interesting, busy and dangerous than earlier life ever was, Hehehe)

3Wed21It took an awfully long time for me to get to the door. On the floor outside the door, was a carrier bag. Some kind soul had kindly gifted me three cups (the three are on the right in this photo, the first one being my current favourite mug). Bless them, I wonder who it was? Jenny? Josie? Deana? I put the cups in the bowl after taking this snap of them.

In the morning, I’ll check to see if any emails had come in telling me whoever had delivered them. Whoever it was, Thank You Kindly! ♥

WD 50.0.0 To the wet room to clean and medicate Little Inchies fungal lesion. Back down in the rust recliner. But no chance of any sleep. After trying for ages to encourage Sweet Morpheous to visit, I got the TV on and found there was a film on, so tuned to that channel to watch it. Even when the adverts came on, there were no nod-offs. Humph!

It was gone the witching hour before sleep came. I recall seeing another film coming on at 01:00hrs, and deciding to try and watch that. I nodded-off within minutes of it starting. This being about 25hrs after first waking up. Zzzz!