INCHY: Tuesday 8th August 2023

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Today has been more than ever surreal,
I woke up with a wobbly left heel,.
A knee that at times I could not feel?
Throughout the day I mustered no zeal!
At times I felt a little funereal!.
Again, sleep was not acquirable,
I felt tired, and Gawdawful,
Though it ended with a decent meal…
No concentration; I felt so angstful,
But, I can be indefatigable…
But not while life is so insurmountable!

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Night pouch contents changed colour?

Or it may be my use of the Kodak Camera?

Morning views…
Kitchen ahead.
Kitchen zoom in on the City Hospital.
Balcony end car park view.

Ablutions – Porcelain Throning.

Rubbish Bags Sorted.

First Mug of Glengettie Tea.

Asda, email with a list of shortages for today’s order.

Cheesy curls for the week.
Got stored away.
Well stocked?
Then sorted the nurses, carers, and delivery people treats.
Plenty of choices for them now.

Letters from EE, The EENT Clinic, & QMC.

Prepped the cooking for the nosh.
Shelled some pod peas, and added them to the rice and veg. Sea salt, and veg Oxo.
Tested them after adding a can of chunky veg soup
to the saucepan. I left the heavy-duty saucepan on low heat for a little longer.
 Blogged away for several more hours, forgetting about the veg cooking…
I rescues the gooey-sticky mess of food, but adding some concentrated Borschst and vinegar to the mix, and gave it a good stirring for a while as it reheated.

Carer Kara returned the laundry for me…
and kindly hung up the dressing gowns for me. ♥

I got the nosh served up…
And it tasted Grrreat!
Flavour-Rating: 9/10! Slurred, gobble, belch!

The last Carer Called; the night bag was attached, to the day bag. The taps & cooker were not checked, though. So I had to carry the night bag with me and my beloved to check on the taps (faucets) and cooker. I’m so glad I did, I’d left the small hob on from cooking the meal. Phew!

Sleep for once came easily. Off into the land of nod in noir time! Had a dream as I recall, I was back as a young whippersnapper, in Brookfield Place in the old Meadows area of Nottingham. I can’t recall too much, other than it was a happy nocturnal dream for once… I think!

Woke up early, and had to get up… a call from the made me get up, and I could not get back to sleep… Fancy that!

Sorry, there’s not much detail.


INCHY: Monday 7th August 2023 – Somewhat belatedly!

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I still find some pleasure in blogging,
But finding time is so testing & trying,
Tired as I am, there’s little time for sleeping…
With failing.
Work not saved being lost had me exprobrating!
The confusion was not easy extrapolating!.
Getting blogging done was foreboding…
I didn’t start it until mid-Tuesday morning!
had me fulgurating,
I made a WP Prompt, that was time-consuming,
Hope it has some readers outwardly laughing?
This blog will be short on detailing…
But at last, I’m doing it, less so much innervating,
Growing old and ailing is so inturbidating!

Night pouch.
About a 4 on the NHS Richter-Scale
The quantity was higher, though!

Waste bags.




Cleaning the hob.
Waste of time, that was.

Potatoes in the crock-pot.
Mug of tea number 1 @ 2 allowed.

Iceland Delivery...
Food, Glorious Food!
More Food, Glorious Food!

Early evening.


Later sunset!

Second mug of Glengettie!


Inchy: Sunday 6th August 2023 – Somewhat belatedly due to Liberty-Global-Virgin Media Constant Failures

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As midnight approached, and the…
Oligarchical smoke & mirrors, figure manipulating genius of failed yet again. I gave up! I turned on the TV; I didn’t care if I woke up or not for the 03:00hrs televised Ladies World Cup match then. Sure, I’d be asleep in minutes… But No! It was not to be. No , nor any of the kept me awake this time. But every time I drifted off into the land of Nod, I’d shoot awake with a helluva shock and jerk! 
I enjoyed watching the game. Not one of the best technically, but well fought by both sides. Norway did not play well at all. But credit to them, they never stopped trying all the same.

So, another night of for the handsome, young, fit, sprightly, cheerful, effervescent, Inchy…

The night bag I attached so late was quite full. That is a good sign!

For the first time in days, the legs looked a little blotchier?

To a snap of the balcony, and had to respond to the sudden need to utilise the .
For the first time in weeks, was in full control of this reluctant and painful evacuation.
I spent a good while on the crosswording, as I did my best to force things along… not very successful, but got there eventually. The cracks in the ceiling added up to 17 this morning.

Got a brew of Glengettie made, and checked with the notepads to remind me of last night’s events. I began to update the Saturday blog; but not for long, thanks to
For Sunday

Later Morning views.

Ten minutes or so later, the Oligarchs returned… Five minutes later…

Ten minutes later it returned.
Off for about 20 minutes this time.
I did some CorelDraw work.

Back, and off again within a minute of returning.

Pissed off with this!

Off to get the ablutions done and a carer arrived. Nice gal.
addicted struck again.

This time, after half an hour it had not returned! When it did after 40 minutes, I’d lost what bit of work I’d done cause I couldn’t save it.
Had to do it all again, in between many more failures from…
Work lost again! My hatred for the legerdomain,  couldn’t-care-less,  figure-distorting, smoke & mirrors, misleading, confusing & expert fact-blurring, led financial manipulators; plutocratically-operated con-artists at .
By the way, they couldn’t give a shit about their customers, even less about their crap internet is not being delivered!
They have shares or have invested in just about every internet company that there is! So if we can convince then we really are piss-off to get a better service elsewhere, the chances are they own or have a share in any company we might try! Leaving costs a small fortune!
Brilliant really! They probably have more finances available – at least, on their manipulated paper figures.

I blogged away for half an hour or so…

Back after a few minutes then off again…

Eleven minutes later it returned. It lasted for half an hour…


Late afternoon view!
Blimus!The internet hasn’t been down for twenty-five minutes!

Paperwork for Kara gathered together.

The second and last mug of tea was taken.

Carer Victor arrived.

Time to get some food prepared!
A decent effort this time.
Flavour Rating 8.7/10!

Evening Sky shots.
From different angles.
High in the sky, below.

In one word, the evening’s sleep was Crap!

Morning All!

Inchy: Saturday 5th August 2023 – Suffering from Mental Malnutrition!

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Thousands of new Student flats are being built by Nottingham City Council and Private companies. Cheap rental Flats, Council Flats. Many caravan sites just out of Nottingham. Discos, Night Clubs, Student Reduced bus fares, Local Mini Brewerys- Free Electric Scooters in the hundreds, Council Houses & Flats, and Hotels Galore, from £15 a night to £650. Muggers, pickpockets and Con-Personages are always available. As are a great variety of drugs; We advise you to get your heavy-duty drugs from the biggest gangs, a list available on request. If you are into CBD-Hemp, many private households have lofts full and fertilised. Very good value, as there are so many households on the dole, who will not be prosecuted for the electricity they by-pass from the neighbour’s meter; thus, you can be assured of a regular supply. If you should visit Nottingham in the rain or snow, you can locate these households cause the heat dries off the rain and melts the snow first before the other few houses’ roofs that are not growing weed in their loft. So, why not consider moving to Nottingham?
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I managed not to leave the hot water tap running last night adopted! However, I did leave the oven on a high setting after making the meal later on for three extra hours. Certainly warmed up the flat! I ate the terrible meal and fell asleep in the c1966, £300 charity shop bought, second-hand, wincingly grotty, beige coloured, not working, crumb-covered from the nocturnal nibblings, itch-making, uncomfortable, virus breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, recliner.
Cock-up with the morning medications. Usually, I’d just take them and swallow them, but spotted what looked like a Warfarin in the pot, and remembered they are nighttime only.
I realised also that the tablet Finasteride, for reducing my prostate size so I might be able to see of my own accord through Little Inchie, is a morning one, but it didn’t look like them? I discovered a strip of Warfarin tablets was put back in the Finasteride box!
Well, at least I know why the DVT nurse, and then the Doctor had called me asking if I am taking the right doses, cause my IRN level was dangerously high – now I know why.
I put the Warfarin back in the Warfarin box. Confusing for the Carers with all the changes in dosages, and change of eye drops. Although, I have to put them in and on myself. I just ask that the Carers make sure I don’t forget to. I got a letter today from the EENT, telling me to make sure I put the Bethpa Gel in twice a day for certain, but not on the day of the operation. “Failure to do this may result in your operation being cancelled by the surgeon on the day”. The presence of Blepharitis increases the risk of infection.

What, me… Worried?

04:50hrs: Sleep was resistant again.
Removed the night pouch, initially with ease…
As I got up right after bending, two of my ailments had a go at me at the same time. and . I ended up falling backwards, onto the £300, second-hand, decrepit, Haemorrhoid Harold-testing, sleep-deterring, nauseatingly beige-coloured, not-working, recliner, with a hell-of-a-thud!

Within a minute or so, I whipped off the dressing gown and had my PPs down. Only to discover that Poor old , onto the Protection Pants, the new dressing gown and trickling down the back of my legs! I used the ready torn-off kitchen towelling to clean things up a bit. No Germoloiding yet, as my plan was to get an early ablutioning session and also needed the Porcelain Throne.
I wrapped the bloodied stuff and pants wrapped in a blue bag and put them in the waste bag. Then off to the wet room.
The saving I thought went well this morning, until I felt the chin and neck… Made a mess of it. Tsk!
Showering, and the blood started pouring again. It reminded me of that horror film, erm… can’t remember the name now. Had a good long clean up, and I enjoyed it too. Glad to say that soon stopped leaking.
Started to dry off, and I thought I heard someone knocking on the front door; went to check, but no one was there. Back in the wet room, I could not find the white towel I’d started to use? Nor my spectacles. Another of the mysteries of Woodthorpe Court, with the hobgoblins, spectres, gnomai, phantasms, ghosts, the grotesque succubae, extraterrestrials, ectoplasm, spirits, or the Fata Morganas, that have been sent to taunt, irritate and terminate my already limited saneness of mind? Where was the damned towel? I thought maybe I’d taken it with me to the door? Went to check, Nope!
When I got back again, I spotted the towel!
Well, without my glasses on, the towel sort of blended into the white of the WC. Haha! Which spurred on the need for the

My rear-end Whoopsiedangleplops was tended to first. Not bleeding now, but tender to touch or sit down for a while. Hehe! The ointment eased things considerably for me.
Areas attached to , knees, and around the privates’ department were well-smeared.
Little was painfully creamed. (It always is!)
The more delicate parts were Terbinafined!

The ears were Olive Oiled.
A quick splash of aftershave stopped the cuts from bleeding!

All done!

Shots from the balcony. A bit of drizzling.
This one was taken through the glass.

Methinks the front room needs tidying up?.
So, I did!

Back into the wet room to have another look for the missing long-distance spectacles.

The Carer arrived. (See Warfarin problem above)

Afternoon views. I’m sorry that this driver is not aware of what double-yellow lines mean?
Had some rain while I’ve mean busy making mistakes and errors on this blog. Mudslide growing?

I got on with the pod-pea-shelling.
Had a pee on the floor at the same time.
Actually, 11 of them. 3 are still AWOL!

I’ve been noting the Oligarchs failing on the notepad. Gone down again. It now stands at…

15 minutes later as the next Carer called…

Eventually got the last blog posted.

At 16:50, the caring considerate, compassionate, kind…

Got back online.
For 20 minutes, then…

Failed once again. Weekend innit?

Got the last of the eye treatments done… well, there is just one dose of the spray in each eye to do.

Then I got the nosh sorted out.
It looked okay, and smelt nice… but was
The potatoes were tasteless, with far too much garlic. The chunks were also bland and tough to chew!
Ruined the meal! But the peas were okayish.
The beetroot and tomatoes were grand tasting!
Flavour-Rating: 503/10!

After the last Carer calling…

I went to check on the cooler and taps being turned off,
This turned out to be a bad decision!
I had, what I consider to be one of my worst (Most Painful) ever, . I used so much bad language and got a sore throat afterwards! I’m only joking, I didn’t get a sore throat!) I did take this photographicalisation of the evening view, from the kitchenette window, though.

I was hoping to stay up to watch the lady’s Football Match in the morning. But I fell asleep in the computer chair, waking up to do more on the blog, but this…

Turned it off to watch the TV. I wondered if I’d wake up to watch the football?

More in Sunday’s exciting, incident-filled blog: Heroic deeds performed. Good Luck in abundance! Romance is in the air.
Health Improvements. No Shaving Cuts. No toe-stubbings!
Amazing Joy & Merriment. Contentment…
Oh, alright then…

Cheers mi-dears!

Inchy: Friday 4th August 2023 – Tap Left Running Again, Hot Waterless!

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Goodness Gracious Me!
I dislodged my humongous body from the clutches of the c1966, £300 pound, second-hand charity-shop bought, crumb-containing, odour-retaining, Harold’s Haemorrhoid-testing, nauseatingly beige coloured, non-working, virus-breeding recliner, giving up to the chances of ever returning. The rattling in my head from the consistent eased immediately. Phew!
I had planned to get the ablutions and shaving sorted first thing, with a stand-up bath so as not to disturb my neighbours with the noise from the shower… but…

Great balls of fire! pillock  ,
, I could spit! That’s the second night I’ve failed to check the taps and cooker, and lost all the hot water! Both me and the Carer, actually. NO HOT WATER to do the ablutions with. No way am I going to risk carrying hot water about again, after the last scoldings I gave myself, carrying it to the wet room for shaving with. At least it didn’t overflow.

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I rose around 02:00hrs and took off the night catheter bag from the .
I had a thirst for a mug o Glengettie tea come over me. This is when I found the hot water tap running cold as you like. Self-condemnation and hatred spouted from my mind and loins, I was annoyed with me! This was despite having a sign up in the hallway opposite the door, that Carer Richard had kindly done and stuck up on the airing cupboard door for me to use to remind myself and other carers. As I said earlier, thank heavens I’d not left the plug in the sink! Could have been a lot worserer, I suppose. Humph! I took these two terribly bad photos of the morning view from the kitchenette window. Then cleaned up the mess in the sink and draining board. I got the waste bags sorted ready, and went to get the computer on… always a nerve-shattering thing, hope that Liberty Global will, might, maybe it’ll work… But No! I should have known better than that, shouldn’t I?
It was not having the quick solutions to come back on this morning. In the end, I had to lose what bit of work I’d done on CorelDraw, WordPress and the Ode – Spit, Spit, Spit!
Turn everything off, DVD reader that’s not right… erm… SD Reader, keyboard, computer and the Liberty-Global thingummy whatsit box and leave things for a while, in the hope that it could come back on in ten minutes or so. I reset the router and hobbled off to respond to the needs of the .
shared a little control with again. Not a lot! The thing that puzzled me a smidgeon, was the three shades of brown in the two torpedoes? One of them was almost black. Still, it made a change.
I got my first mug of Glengettie made and enjoyed it. A lovely strong brew! Have way through gulping it down and chimed out as the Carer arrived for the first visit. It was the new gal, Marilyn or Maria I think her name is. Nice gal; we managed a few minutes of chin-wagging in between. Nice lady.

I pressed on with the blogging but kept feeling guilt and annoyance at having no water, so no shave. You bet your bottom dollar that tonight when the water has heated up, I’ll have nodded off, with me getting up so early in the morning.

This late afternoon, I managed to take two of the worst photos I’ve ever managed before!

Both pictures were set on the ‘Indoor Option’ on the Kodak.
Both, as you can see, came out weirdly reflective, if that’s the right word. I wonder what I did wrong this time?

Made the semi-prepared meal. The spuds were done in the slow cooker, halved and a splatter of BBQ sauce was applied. The fresh garden peas with a bit of mint in them were gorgeous!
The cheese pasties were done in the oven. The tomatoes were halved and liquid salt was added. Nice!
Flavour-Rating: 7.9/10.

Lips, faces, & a spear?


Inchy: Tuesday 1st August 2023

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What an expensive day!
The usual getting things wrong, forgotten about, dropped, lost, back-to-front, or the many dithering moments guaranteed another 24 hours of anosmia. With eyesight that put me in danger as it would get worse momentarily; Dangerous on my hobble to and from the Optician. Where, between them and the Ozan food store, I spent a small fortune!
Two costly eye medications bought, the Smoked Knuckle that I couldn’t resist, and cash to pay the Easy-Link from the thingy in the wall in Sherwood. I was out of the flat for about five hours, and returned having spent on the glasses, medications and shopping treats… over £320! The Bank Balance is at its lowest for years now! The eye is still bothering me and as I said, making me a bit nervous. The eye this morning, is even more painful after having the cream and spray put on last night.
A Fed-Upperedness-Lingers!
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Night Pouch.
NHS Scale 4

Sprayed the slippers.

Kitchen morning view.

Not sure why I took this one – or even meant to?
Rushed around getting things ready for the trip to the Opticians.
Carer Kara arrived. No eye drops were given. She said she will try to find out for me whether I should or not be using them still. ♥ Medications sorted.

Had a bash at doing the blog, but within ten minutes…

I set of with the I hoped all the things I needed in the three-wheeled-walker trolley. Old spectacle frames to have the new lens fitted into. My wristwatch, bus pass, mobile phone, the beloved Kodak camera, and some cash. I set off on the journey to the opticians. I went down in the lift and took this snap of the information board as I got out of the elevator.

I walked outside and down to the Winwood foyer. This was to escape the drizzle and high winds.
Took these snaps of the view from within the outer foyer.
Then as the time neared for the bus, out to the bus shelter.
Taking this snap of the traffic island outside the flats. The wind was blasting the weeds and plants all over.

Down into Sherwood, got off of the bus without any tumbles or falls this time. Up to the crossing, over the road and into the opticians. Where the three pretty young lady assistants pampered me a little… I loved that! They seem to have taken to me? Another mystery! I was helped with the trolley into the examination room. But on my going inside…
I felt the catheter pouch dropping… Dam It! After all that time preparing everything to go out, I’d not emptied the pouch! I cringed as I had to ask if there was anywhere I could empty it. The lady kindly took me through the back of the shop, through some narrow junk rooms; she even helped me get up the steps to the WC.
Back to the test room. It must have taken her well over an hour & a half with all the tests needed. The outcome was costly!
I needed an eye spray and Gel. The tears were drying far too quickly, and the grit-in-the-eye scenario needed the spray. I can’t recall how much they each were, but the total was £23! pound. And there was me, thinking it was my natural charismatic charm, humour, and good looks that were getting appreciated by the staff. Hahaha! It must have been three hours after arriving, I was freed, to get some cotton pad (Not wool) from Wilko. Who, of course, didn’t have any in stock. But I let the girls select a can of pop of their choice from the trolley before departing to Wilko’s.

I hobbled carefully down to the Ozan store.

I was foolishly tempted to buy more veg knuckles and a large potato. Got some cash from the machine outside as I left.
A danged expensive trip this one was!

Then a grinding hobble back up Winchester Street Hill.
I think the hobble earlier helped me cope with it easier this time.
Approaching the left turn to the flats, which was not in view yet.
Almost there…
These wildflowers caught my attention again, as the poor things were getting battered by the winds.

I got inside the flats and was commandeered by ILC (Independent Living Coordinators), Oberstgrüppenfuhreress, Warden and Primo Ballerina, Warden Deana & Generaloberstess, Ice skating champion florist and Warden Julie’s office. This is used as a holding cell and an interrogation room. Only joking!
A Prisoner’s… no, Tenant’s detail updating was done.
The new ailments had to be added. Har-Har!
This took a while.

Back to the flat.
Along the link passage from Winwood to Woodthorpe Court.
At the end, Near the swipe door…
A photo of the overgrown natural greenery!

Back up to the apartment.
The knuckle and the potato.
The potato was put in the oven on low heat.

Tried to catch up with yesterday’s blog.

Gave up, and checked on the potato in the oven; it needed a little longer. I sat in the £300, second-hand, most uncomfortable, decrepit, Haemorrhoid Harold-testing, micro-organism-microbe-bugged, easily-fallout able from, unfit-for-use, not working, recliner, and nodded off with being kind, as well as the giving me a break…
was kind as well… then as heavenly peace arrived… I think was beginning a peaceful dream with a HRH Petal-Lisa and me in a railway carriage, dining… somewhat
the landline burst into flashing mode.
I jerked awake, my glasses dropped of my head… I carefully (I thought) rose from the recliner; knocking off a bottle of spring water and the torch off of the ottoman… nearly lost my balance going the two paces nodded to get to the telephone, and responded with a pleasant, ‘Good Evening’ quote. It was the
, with the results of the blood test. My INR had gone up to 4.2 for some reason, so the new dosages were given to me. Struggling to hear what the receptionist was saying didn’t matter this time; it was easy to hear… one each night! I thanked her and nearly tripped over the bottle of spring water as I went to the carers table and change the dosage on the Meridian book cover. Collected the dropped items from my getting up, and got back down into the £300, second-hand, c1968, charity shop-bought, eyesore-horrendously grungy coloured, Harold Haemorrhoid-testing, easily-falloutable from, unfit-for-use, not working, recliner… but not for long… I got the nosh sorted and started to dine well.

Within about ten minutes the door chime chimed out its; tune.

It was Carer Chris coming for the last call of the day. Nice and early too, I was half asleep. He got the and on the eye; the gel application hurt a smidge as I recall after it was put on, but nothing too bad.
No painkillers were offered, and, as I found out in the morning, no night pouch was added to the day bag. I think the lad knew from earlier how tired I felt with the trip out. He was off quickly, telling me to get some sleep, bless him.

But it was not to be!
Again the raged. No peace, just reminders of past errors, mistakes and shameful moments, relentlessly. One incident from 1957 was thrown in this time. This is getting bad, I wonder if I can get any help with this problem?
Has anyone mentioned it to Rishi Sunak, yet? Hahaha!

Still, I’m eating well!

Oh, just found this photo that I missed off!

INCHIES Pareidolia Lovers Delight in the Sky!

Pareidolia Lovers Delight

Clouds! You Didn’t Mention Clouds!

A selection of photographicalisations taken by Inchie.
He, a pareidoliaing addict who thought others might
appreciate the value & delight in some of these, taken
over the last four weeks from his kitchenette window.

Yes, most people have a larger toilet than his kitchen.
However, he loves living there up in the clouds,
Away from the maddening crowds,
While pareidoliaing, he’s had many thoughts sprout,
It’s his way of trying to chill out…
With a bag of crisps and a bottle of stout,
It’s all his delight, he asks and wants for nowt…
Sunset clouds… He’s always on the lookout,
Course, he’s medical things to worry about…
He believes pareidoliaing helps shut them out…
He’s almost contented in his kitchen, his redoubt…
If he spots an animal or figure,
Well, that could be a trigger…
For far less frustration and anger…
In one of these photos, he sees an old codger!
Another, he thinks there’s a beefburger?
In the one looking like the moon, a derringer!
Ghosts, angels… course, he’s as blind as a badger!
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Here we go…

A humdinger of a view! – Press Here! Hehe!


Can you see anything in there?

Lumix efforts.

See the arms and legs? I can’t now, Humph!

You must see the ghost? Har-har!

Now you really must?

Marble clouds?

Like the surface of the moon?
Lumix shot, see the black spot?
No idea what caused it, but it’s still there!

My imagination goes on the rampage for these two!

Sunset finishing

Next night. (Fuji camera)

Oil painting-like?

Afternoon twinkling?


Layered sky.
Sun going down…
Star Trek clip?

Yesterdays ghost. Taken through
the rainy window in the kitchen

🎶 Ghost riders in the Sky? 🎶

The face of the year so far… See him?

Moon surface?

Last week I think. Star Wars? No… erm…
Star Tre… no. Erm… oh, dearie me…
Will whatsit was in it… aliens flashing lights and
sounding klaxons. Anyway, it made me think

about that film.
Ah… I’ve Gorrit!
Well, I think I have.
Not so sure now…

Please let me know if anyone can see what I do in this
cracking last picture, please? (Creatures)

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Cheers, Each – Keep Safe!

Inchcock’s Tips & Advice – In Ode

They incarcerate the wealthy youngsters here now, aged only 50, a pity,
Cause with my handicaps, now I’m not so nifty,
Then there’s my ticker, neuropathy, deafness and cecity,
But I’m not jealous, bothered or show any causticity,
I have Whoopsidangleplops, Accifauxpas and await the next atrocity,
To survive in here, you must not show any mordacity,
Indeed, you must forget to display any animosity!

Anyone arriving wishing to survive will find the tips and advice in ode below, of some value, I hope… Good Luck!


Put to the back of your mind, hopes, plans or anything ambitious,
With leaking windows… it helps to know about being amphibious,
If you are old or ill, some of the Carers are delicious!
Get in with them for any chance of being auspicious!
Resist doing anything whatever that could be audacious!
Make sure you cannot be considered cretaceous,
For depressions in here are somewhat enormous,

No matter what you do or say, it’ll be classed as contentious,
Don’t ever mention the balcony’s winds being blusterous,
Or not being able to hear the fire alarm being hazardous,
Cause they’ll fit you a pillow shaker alarm, it’s not desirous,
It runs on Wi-fi, the false alarms are regular and continuous,

Advice for the intercom and heaters are both contradictious,
Understanding them, you need to be intelligent and perspicacious,
Act a thicko with thick skin, should certainly be advantageous,
One benefit, mind, if you are ill enough, the nurses are curvacious!
You’ll be too old, so no opportunities to try to get amorous!

Contemptuousness and sarcasm seem to be contagious,
Another thing, silence can prove somewhat meritious,
Forget about being doing right and being conscientious,
Best to concentrate, on just staying alive and conscious,

Faux pas and Whoopsiedangleplops, try to keep uncomplicitous
Tending towards being garrulous can be jeopardous,
To anyone not wanting to be sneered at by those sequacious,
Never show signs of being boisterous,
Best to stay looking bored and innocuous,
They like it that way, and when you get on the wrong bus!

No need to worry if you are regularly flatuous,
I assure you that affliction affects 90% of us!
If the nurse calls cause your bottom’s furunculous,
Grit your teeth, and try to look hebetudinous!
Try not to overdo the acting humorous,
Never gossip about anything calumnious!
Or you may find yourself considered complicitous!

Part Of Inchcock’s Make Em Laugh-In-Ode Series

A simple bus ride to fetch my Spectacles – Not on your life, talk about things going wrong. Humph!

A simple bus ride to fetch my Spectacles

Not on your life, talk about things going wrong!

The things you will read on this so-called true-funny blog of mine,

Really are true, and challenge my sanity  and mind,

Please persist reading, and you will find,

Why I have logicality, hopelessness and despondencies entwined!

Off to Sherwood to collect my glasses,

I’ll call on Jenny and Doris, such lovely lasses,

I’ll leave them a treat, containing molasses,

Might get a chinwag with whoever passes?


Caught the lift down with no problem at all,

Left the bag, hope they have a ball,

Returned to lift lobby hall,

Catching the elevator, not easy at all,

I was so frustrated and appalled,

25 minutes later, the lift responded to my call!


Rushing out to Chestnut Walk, slipped and broke my shoe,

Clouted it on the walker’s wheel, surely there is some good luck due?

But what made me saddest, was the bus had departed, early too!

So, all het-up now, I legged-it, passed-wind, and feared wanting a poo!


On Winchester Street, The walker ran away from me,

I chased it, and is facticity,

I wedged it against a box for electricity,

To take this phot, but not with enough adequacy,

I stopped it again but with inefficacity,

No doubt about it, this was going to be a trip of paucity!


I got down the hill, energy’s what I did lack,

I must get the bus up the hill going back,

I called on two shops to get cleaner and a snack,

Off to the optician’s, the one drawback,

I was wearing a sort of anorak,

I was so hot, but didn’t hold back,

Got in the shop, and took the receptionist flak,

I was late, it seems was her crack!


I had a long wait to be seen,

Not that I was all that keen,

£300 to pay, never again to be seen,

Crosswording while I waited,

The receptionist called me to be seen,

The lady dealt with me, glasses were fitted,

I got quite jolly-fully contented and witted,

Until it came time to pay, the nI was fritted!

I’d forgotten my pin number again,

I think the lady thought of me; “What a Pain!”

From crying out loud, I did refrain,

She got the money through, this seemed diaphane,

How I don’t know, so I asked her, it felt germane,

I didn’t understand her, and felt a right dumb-brain,

Thanked her, pretending to understand, I did mislain,

Still, she didn’t moan or complain!

Then out and up the hill, to catch the bus again!


I had to doge another Pavement Cyclist, he gave me a fright, 

I was too tired to comment or get into a fight,

I’d run out of the Kryptonite! 

Would I make the walk home up the fearsome hill? I might! 

Down to the traffic light corner,

And the bus passed by, I was too late!

I checked the next ones time and date, 

40 minutes, too long to stand and wait,

So I set off, limping, with an unsteady gait!

The hill looked a fearsome sight, 

The prospect of climbing it, made me feel uptight,

Sorry that I didn’t wait for the bus, I felt contrite!

Anyone seeing me struggle up the road must have seen a sickening sight,

I was sure the gradient was gaining height?

The hobble home seemed infinite

At the top of Winchester, the parkers made things tight,

For breakfast, I should have had some Marmite,

The time went by slowly, and things went quite,

Somehow, up the last part of the hill, I did expedite, 

To see a harrowing sight,

The 40 bus arriving, some tenants did alight,

 My energy was drained completely now, flat!

Didn’t have the energy for eating my cervelat,

Must not fall asleep, I’ll have to do summat,

I got back to the apartment, Zzzz; that was that!

After this abysmal, Whoopsiedangle-ridden trip, the poor old twit, did have fleeting thoughts of a suicidal nature. but he did not act on them – He fell asleep! Haha!

Inchcockski – Sunday 13th September 2020: Long, long day! But this phagomaniac made a decent meal for once!

TFZer Gal – Bootiful!

Sunday 13th September 2020

Spanish: Domingo 13 de Septiembre de 2020

13th September 1959: The first man-made Object (Luna 2) reaches the Moon!

About an hour after getting down to sleep, I woke to see the colourfulness and the brightness of the night coming through the thin, tatty, old, raggedy, multi-holed curtains. I could not resist fighting my way out of the recliner to take a photo of it. Lovely!

Around 00:50hrs, I woke again, in need of a wee-wee, and struggled to the OGPEB (Overnight-Grey-Plastic-Emergency-Bucket), and struggled to pass what was maybe 2 or 3 fluid-ounces, over the next five minutes or so! Yes, another RSHH (Reluctant, Sprinkling-Half-Hearted) wee-wee! Hobbled to wash my hands, and then I got back down in the £300, second-hand, c1968, cringingly beige-coloured, unkempt, fluctuant, ramshackle, non-operational, uncomfortable, dusty, rusty, decaying, tatterdemalion, heavy yet tottery and unbalanced, positively-dangerous to use, rickety recliner, I soon nodded off again, which was pleasant and a change.

02:10hrs: I stirred into mock-life again, wanting another wee-wee. This time, catching my balance as I grabbed the stick, was a little more difficult, I’ve no idea why, but I got the bucket in time. It was an RSHH mode again, but with far less pain. The  Post-Micturition After Dribble lasted much longer than the main event did. Drip-drip, dribble, wait, sprinkle, drip… Tsk!

I could sense that things in the wee-weeing department were going to continue in the little-and-often style, so I emptied and sanitised the OGPEB, disinfected it and returned it to the computer room for later use. (And believe me, it saw plenty of action!). I’ll try to resist mentioning too many of them, it may sound too dull, but to me they were annoying. Each one was of deep luteous shade.

I remembered (Miracles do happen, then? Hahaha!) that the Falls-Team arranged delivery of a new walking frame was due to arrive today. So I got with doing the Health Checks sharpishly. The flipping SYS is still high!

The temperature, using the stick thermometer was the highest its been in many a month!

But that’s a good thing, I think anyway? I don’t think its too high at all.

I took a photo of the tablet trays, to show you how it is so easy to make a mistake in taking them. Although these pods were designed, to make it easier for we slightly more mature dodderers, and cut back on such errors. As you can see, the pills are all over the placed, many stuck under the covers, and others had moved into another compartment altogether! Many were stuck on the glue, others by the static electricity in the packaging. When they were first introduced, they told me they’d be fool-proof as well! Hah!

Obviously, they had forgotten about the well known locally ‘Special Skills’ of Carrington Pharmacy, 343-345 Mansfield Rd, Carrington, Nottingham NG5 2DA, Telephone number: 0115 960 5453, just up Mansfield Road, from the Lidl store.

I’d no idea what time of day the frame might come, so I got on with updating the Saturday post. Got it completed and Pinterested some snaps from it. Went on Facebook updating, then the same with the WordPress Reader. Emailed the link, and made a brew of Glengettie Gold.

I closed down Computer Cameron and got some hand-washing done, before doing the ablutions. The old oven grabbers were washed with the other stuff. I’ve still got the new gloves, but these although hard to clean, easy to dirty, and very old and tatty (a bit my me really, Hahaha!), they’re more effective and easier to hold onto when Shaking Shaun or Nicodemus’s neurotransmitters play up.

I had a bit of spontaneous breakfast after the washing was done, wrung and hung—cheese biscuits and a pot noodle, and off to the wet room for a scrubbing-up.

I needed a Porcelain Throne visit first. One of the easiest for a long time. Yee-Ha! Still painful, of course, but so much quicker than even yesterday’s was! A bit of blood, a smidge messy. Needed cleaning up before I took a shower, Haha!

But would the cistern clear things? No! I needed to hand-fill the tank a couple of times, and still, some bits were floating even then? Aggravannoying!

The ablutions were miraculously incident-free again! Not much bother from Toothache Terence, only one dropsy of the toothpaste tube! The shaving produced only two little nicks that did not bleed much at all. Doing the showering and only one mini-dizzy-spell, and three dropsies! Drying off went well, too!

Ah, well, the medicationalisation didn’t go as smoothly, I’m afraid. I thought that the rear-end furuncle was clearing up yesterday, I was wrong, and applied the ointment a little too roughly, and the blood flowed! So had to apply some Dakacort cream to get it to stop! I cunningly did this in the shower area and then sprayed-away the resulting blood flow mess using the shower-head. (Smart, eh? Smug-Mode-Adopted!) Harold’s Haemorrhoid’s done with the Germoloid cream, and Arthur Itis’s knees and hands with the Phorpain Gel. I felt rather good about how I coped these problems!

The leg ulcer, or Clopidogrel allergy markings, had spread-out but got fainter, and some new ones appeared on top of the right foot, below the base of the toes. The fresh ones looked like freckles. Ah, well, it stops me getting bored, Hehehe! 

I got the new PPs on, a pair of trousers, and the maroon zip-up shirt. The Sock-glide was given a sneer of contempt, as I left the wet-room.

Because I was not wearing any socks, and the vicious, finger bruising and crushing monstrosity, was again, not going to be used, and my digits and legs put at risk of injury once more! Not that it scares me, of course! Oh, no!

Then, I set-too making up some black waste bags, and put the Floor-Voting paper on them, so as not to forget to take them with me on the way out with the bags, to the Rubbish chute, and take the voting paper down to the lobby.

I got a face-mask on, and the items were carried by hand, using only the wooden walking -stick. For some unknown reason, at that time, I felt in a rather panurgic, ready-for-anything mood? Yes, it confused and baffled me as, why as well!

By the time I’d got out, and to the chute-room, unfortunately, things had changed quickly. I was all over the place with the walking stick, and must have appeared drunk to anyone who might have seen me? The old balance had gone to pot again. I got the bags in the chute alright though.

Then clouted my right elbow against the door frame, on the way out of the room!  A spot of turbidity in the brain as I waited for the lift down to the ground-floor lobby. By the time I’d got down to the ground floor, and into the main hall, my balance was a lot better, and the foggy-brain seemed to be clearing. What’s going on here?

I posted the floor colouring preferences sheet into the ballot box.

And again, with a renewed physical and mentally settled state, I got the lift back up to the flat.

Where, perversely, the semiobscurity returned to the brain and vagueness, a lack of concentration came over me. My memories of getting Josie’s meal prepared is a bit sketchy. I discovered later on that I’d forgotten to photograph it, yet everything from when I wheeled it to Josie’s door, is crystal-clear? We chatted a short while, and I returned to the flat’s kitchen to get the cleaning up done.

I was doing well again, and then almost flaked out. My body and mind told me to get down in the chair, and stay there; I checked that I had on Medical Alert Alarm wristlet, which I did. And I immediately nodded of fitfully. I kept on waking up with the sunshine coming through the thin, decrepit, holed, curtains. But, nodded back off almost straight away each time. I suddenly jumped awake, and felt a different person, back to my old self? I’ll put this on the questionnaire when it comes from the hospital.

But I was feeling fine, and got up to check on the potatoes in the slow-cooker, made a brew of Glengettie Gold tea, and got the computer back on to update this blog. And Nicodemus’s neurotransmitters, and SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley), were both being good to me! I couldn’t understand what had happened, but I was so happy that things had returned to semi-normal. Obviously, now a scepticism and uncertainty remained, a sort of fear that it might happen all over again. Whatever the heck it was?

The door chimes rang out. It was an NHS chappie, delivering the new narrower walker for me. He was in a rush, my EQ picked up on that. I remembered what Nurse Caroline had told me about not doing anything with it when it is delivered until she calls again on Wednesday. So I put it with the spare three-wheeler on the balcony. I never thought I’d use one of these! It was wider than I expected, and I didn’t cope very well with it, putting it on the veranda, at all.

Updated this blog again, and it is now hours beyond my usual head-down time.

But the need for some Diary TFZer top graphics is urgent, so I moved onto CorelDraw.

Decided to make another brew first, straight Glengettie this time.

Then took a snap of the sunshine, and returned to CorelDrawing at last.

I only got one graphic done, (Tsk!), and made the template for tomorrows, and the got the fodder sorted out. Better late than never!

Battered fish strips, slow-cooked potatoes halved, and a bit of butter and onion-salt sprinkled on them. Garden peas, and some of the delightful baby Piccalo tomatoes. A pot of raspberry ripple mousse from the freezer, thawed out as I as the meal, nicely!

Tired-out now, but I stayed alert enough to enjoy this feast. Deserving of a Flavour-Rating of 8/10.

Went to get the meal things soaking in washing up bowl, and took this photograph of the evening’s view.

Having been up for over 20 hours or so, and in a state of weariness that was high, even for me, I felt so sure that I’d nod-off within minutes of getting my head down in the £300, second-hand, c1968, puke-making beige coloured recliner. It was not to be!

Sweet Morpheous did eventually arrive, but it was gone midnight by then! At least I got around four hours of deep-sleep in, before waking up in urgent need of a wee-wee and the Porcelain Throne. Ah, well, TTFN!