The Amazing Mikhail Steedenski Mystery Photographicalisation


Naturally, any mispelling found in this post was dun on purpose like.



Mikhail showing off his talent of transmogrification?

Or should that be transfiguration or transmutation?

Whichever; Marissa, Rachel and Duncan are showing elation,

His ping-pong skills and his 007 imitation,

His shady character, driller or a PC at the station,

His snogging with Shirl, gets no castigation,

I think they others may be about to give him an ovation,

Rachel in red seems to like them, offering her beautiful smile,

Marissa in black, sober and overjoyed for a while?

Duncan’s looks suspicious, thinks this might all be an halucination?

Confusing; might there be a table-tennis match invasion?

What do you make of Mikhail’s skills of duplication?

Can it be he’s an alien from another nation?

Is this they see, an out-of-this-world eerie occasion?

Marissa noted, there was no Claret bottles around Mikhails location,

Could this be true, or just an assignation?

So, she nipped into the house, to his work-station…


Blimey! She found another Mikhail, guzzling wine, some were Malasian,

They instantly formed an affiliation,

Got sozzled, with a healthy enjoyable determination!

Inchcock Today Saturday 13 August 2016: Lovely visit to see Olive


Saturday 13th August 2016

0520hrs: Forced my eyelids to open and mind to activate… with difficulty.

The bits I could remember of the dreams was very sparse. At one part I was being flayed verbally and with a whip and castigated over my bad memory? Mind you, for a change it wasn’t in a bombed out building, nor was I being chased… this was on the deck of a galleon, my oppressors were many and varied, some who I know or have known in real life? And, they appeared, to be fighting and squabbling with each other to get the use of whip? It felt so real, the pain I mean. Later when I had my shower, I found myself checking to see if I had any lashing marks on me from the dreams? Hehe!

Eventually, after I’d depressed myself over the dreams, I got out of the £300 noisy, shaking second-hand recliner and to the wet-room, where the WRHD did not go well at all. Difficulty in passing, blood in the stool and back passage and it took an inordinately long time to complete. Then the stomach started of grumbling again, but nowhere near as back as yesterday morning.

Made a brew, forgot to take the medications, but I remembered later on. Got the kitchen titivated then the laptop on to do the diaries to date. When finishing yesterday’s journal, I had a sudden impulse to do a humorous graphic post and set about doing this on CorelDraw and CorelPaint.It took around two hours or so. This is the header for the funny. Rachel Carerra, Shirley and Mike Steeden and Marissa Bergen. A 

It took around two hours or so. This is the header for the funny post. Rachel Carerra, Shirley and Mike Steeden and Marissa Bergen. A cracklingly attractive and desirable selection of females! (Not including Mike is this statement like) I made it a bit of a Funny Caption/Comment Competition thingie.


Had to nip for another WRWW.

01bOn the way back I looked at the desk with all the paperwork that needed sorting – thought about it, took the medications with some lemon flavoured spring water, made another cuppa and started this diary off.

Should get on with this sorting later actually.

After an hour or so on WordPress, I went to get the Peptac for an extra swig cause the stomach is still playing up. Then realised I had not got the vegetables going in the Crock-Pot! So enjoyed yesterday’s that I tried to put 01dthe same seasonings into this one. A tiny bit of demerara sugar, oregano, mint sauce, vegetable stock and a splash of vinegar. No idea if that was what I used yesterday, but it sounded okay?

The vegetables today were: garden peas, carrots, leeks, red and white onions, orange peppers (Hope they aren’t too strong?). Cleaning afterwards I managed without any effort at all, to cut my finger with the paring knife. It didn’t bleed much, but I did drop the cutting board, and it hit my knee on its way to the floor. So, another pair of jammie bottoms into the already overstuffed, overflowing huge laundry bags! Blooming good job BJ is lifting me to the launderette on Tuesday, bless him.

I’d had been hoping for less Whoopsiedangleplops today as well. Humph!

1120 hrs: Got myself all cleaned up, scrubbed, polished, scented, showered, shaved and fit for my visit to see Olive this afternoon. Spent a lot longer under the shower. Lavender soap was utilised. (Can’t find any more in the shops, this tablet is getting like should be getting, thinner and far less volume – Hehe!) Citrus body spray used, no aftershave, though.

01e1155 hrs: All done! Feeling better now. I went in to weigh myself.

8 oz down! (Well, 7¼ oz then!)

So chuffed about this. Especially after giving up all hope of stopping the daily increase over the past week and finding my superbly conditioned but jelly-like blob of ageing body mould to have increased daily to a higher total by 8lb! Hee ha!

01fInto the kitchen to make a cuppa and take the midday medications and noticed I hadn’t taken the rubbish bins to the chute after sorting the out earlier.

Back on the laptop, it’s still too soon to go and visit Olive yet, as her son, grandson, daughter or granddaughter is taking her shopping this morning.

I put the Feet First appointment for Saturday 17th September at 1400hrs that I made yesterday, onto the Google Calendar.

Checked on the Crock-Pot vegetables cooking and added a spot of mint sauce to the mix as it bubbled away before I realised I’d already put some in. Tsk!

I did some Facebooking on the TFZ site. Two hours or so later, I checked the Crock-Pot and had a taste… still a bit bland, so I added a spoon of concentrated black bean sauce. I’ve no idea what I’m doing here now. Hope it comes out alright in the end.

Got a phone call come in, answered it quickly with a ‘Good Morning’ (Although is was afternoon) – Silence reigned for a few seconds, then a strongly Asian-accented voiced chap or woman began: “And jolly good most morning to you, I am…” I put the phone down. Felt a bit bad afterwards, but with getting so many of these calls that are trying to con or sell me something… Tsk!

Off to see Olive for a laugh, chinwag and cuddle. Rather sadly, I returned to my own apartment, and the vegetables looked to be done to perfection. So, I got the meat in the oven and sliced some pork loin to go with it as an extra treat (Not that I deserved it).

01bCleaned the utensils and put the Crock-Pot porcelain bowl in the sink to soak, and the meal was ready to serve up.

It looked a bit of a generous serving to me… but I guiltily ate it all up with great lip-licking passion.

One of my better efforts (Although a too large meal, Tsk!) A 9.3/10 methinks. Took the evening medications and faded quickly, into the £300 second-hand recliner and put the TV on, channel swapping a lot because I couldn’t make my mind up what to watch.

Around midnight, I awoke from a nod-off and got up for a WRHD… and it proved to be a painful exercise. Stubbed my already blackened toe on the Ottoman, did the job on the porcelain throne bloodily and painfully, dropped my bar of carbolic soap as I washed my hands and clouted my head on the sink as I went down to retrieve it!


Inchcock Today Friday 12th August 2016: Chiropodist, Nottingham Beach, Visited Olive and flaked out!


Friday 12th August 2016

0535hrs: Woke hanging half in and half out of the shuddering £300 second-hand recliner. The TV was still on, crumbs on my belly (Rice cake crumbs), and with thoughts from the dreams flaying about rampantly in my mind. They faded almost instantly, leaving just a couple of them left. I was in heaven and having a ball with many of the folk I have known over the years, I think I even went fishing at one stage with Duncan Robertson, Marissa Bergen and Mike Steeden, on a canal in Amsterdam?

I manipulated my way off of the not working at the moment £300 second-hand recliner and went to put the kettle on, took the medications and then off for a WRWW and WRHD session. As I opened the door, the heat greeted me like as if I was walking into a gigantic oven! Yes, I’d left the heater on!

01iAfter performing the required functions, the blood was splattered over the porcelain pan, and my stomach, which had previously been fine before the ‘passing’ moments before, started to churn rumble hurt and felt it wanted to escape from my innards? (The lamb burgers last night perhaps?)

The involuntary passing of wind was so violent and mephitic, I feared with all the heat from the eleven hours of the leaving the wall heater on in the wetroom, I might have an explosion on my hands! (Hehehe!)

Then, I stubbed my already blackened middle left foot toe on the trolley in there. Not a good start I thought?

With the memory letting me down lately and forgetting to take the camera out with me, I thought I’d get some batteries into the little old camera and put it in the shopping bag.

Made a brew and got the laptop on to finish yesterday’s diary and make a start on this one. The spontaneous emissions from the rear continued.

Checked the emails in case the doctor had sent an appointment time for the next INR Warfarin Blood Test on Tuesday 16th, as instructed by the Anticoagulation team. They sent:  Good afternoon Mr Chambers, We can offer you an appointment for you INR blood test on Wednesday 17th August at 1.30pm. Sorry but this is the earliest appointment available. Please let us know if this is suitable for you. Kind Regards.

Every time over the last three months, when I’ve requested an appointment for the INR test, I have asked for a morning one if possible. Never got one yet, Tsk! Wednesday, I have the cleaning ladies coming in, so will have to get my skates on to get to the surgery in time afterwards. Int life complicated sometimes?

Patti Beckert, (Cyber-Friend Extraordinaire) sent me this email:


Got some Facebooking done. The door bell rang, it was the Red Cross man calling with the shower stool. I signed for it, and he collected the shower chair and off he went.

Back to the Facebooking and suddenly realised how late it was!11b

01iRushed about, had a quick wash, changed the togs, no time for a shower or shave.

Hobbled as quickly as I could, up through the park and to the bus stop in Sherwood.

The bus soon arrived, and it was jam packed!

Amazingly when I dropped off the bus at the Victoria Centre, I still had about 6 minutes to go until the Feet First appointment. Exhausted and blowing a bit with painful feet, I arrived just in time! A different lady did me toes today, I told her about what I’d written on the TrustPilot page about British Gas, and she said she’d have a look.

01jOut and onto Upper Parliament Street, went up over the walkway above the street and took the photographs above. Police, Ambulances and a pavement being repaired that made pedestrians struggle to get around it.

01kOver on into Victoria Shopping Centre (Mall) and down into Boots to have a look around. Then out across the road and into Clinton Street (Above). I’ve never seen so few people on it before?

Then into the Pound Shop to see if they had any Lavender soap or aerosol fabric spray in, they did not. But I got some Caramelised biscuits, bog cleaner and Bisto Chip Shop gravy granules. 

11aI walked down and around the Council House.

Taking extra care of the Pavement Cyclists that were all over the place.

Outside Primark store, the Police had their hands full with removing some shoplifters from the building and getting them to go into the Police Van, around five officers and three perps, not helped by the suspects talking and shouting, spitting, presumably swearing too, in what sounded like Polish or Lithuanian like accented language to me.

I stood and watched them for a while, entertaining it was.

09There was a huddle of folk on Long Row, so I investigated what was going on.

It was some scantily dressed young ladies handing out free mini-cans of Coca-Cola.

And the Nottingham Citizens liked that… very much!

I fought my way into the Slab-Square and the entertainments and the imported beach to take some photographicalisations of the same.

Nottingham Beach Photographicalisations Today

10 10bVery popular today.

Made my way up Queen Street to the L9 bus stop with my bags of stuff and aching feet. I’d forgot to mention them to the chiropodist with being so late arriving. Tsk!

No hiatus on the bus… until we got to the traffic lights on the corner of Porchester Road and Woodborough Road, where a lady driver in the inside lane managed to hit the front corner of the bus as she passed to turn left! Made for a bit of interest again. Poor gal, she came to the bus apologising and the drive put her at rest, telling her she’s only scraped the paintwork.

They exchanged detail, and we were on our way in ten minutes or so. Of course, this made the driver well behind on his schedule, so we old ones on the bus aged a bit quicker as tried to make up the time. Hehe!

Back at the flat, and a WRWW later, I’d started the Crock-pot, put the things away, and made a cup of tea. Took the evening medications and was on my way to visit Olive. Who, incidentally I’ve always thought lived at 82, but actually, lives at 68. Just thought I’d mention it like.

I knew straight away she was feeling okay, cause she told me off for getting her a cream dessert and making her eat the wrong sort of foods! Hehehe! I was so glad to report she had got her appointment at the South Wing at the Queens Medical Centre for Tuesday after next.

We had a chinwag, then a most pleasurable kiss and cuddle, and I departed.

Back to me own place and got on with updating this diary.

I decided to have a lamb hotpot with the vegetables from the slow cooker, 01acause I’d seasoned them with mint and thought they’d go together well?

The Stock-Pot vegetables came out grand and flavoursome.

I admit to doing a bit of nibbling later on, that’ll not help my depression when I use the scales in the morning, will it? Tsk!

I got the new jammy bottoms.

Sleep was again, despite my getting a decent hobble about in today, so very hard to obtain, a few minutes here and there nod-0ffs, but I was still stubbornly winding back the DVD as late as 0100hrs or later before I eventually drifted off.

This was not helped when I had to get up rather urgently for a WRWW and found I’d got the jammy bottoms on back to front!

Inchcock Today Wed 17 Feb 16: Started slow, then got slower!

A lawyer was making his case in a crowded courtroom when he noticed four gentlemen in the back of the room on tip-toes and trying to get a better view.

So the lawyer stood up on a chair and asked if they could see him now, the four men, an Englishman, a Frenchmen, a Spaniard and a German, answer the lawyer in order:

“Yes!” “Oui!” “Sí” “Ja!”!

With thanks to Timothy Price, for forwarding this joke for me to use.


Wednesday 17th February 2016

Gave up trying to sleep and got up around 0110hrs. Had a painful tinkle, made a cuppa and laptop on.

Got on with finishing the Monday diary.

Doing a lot of sneezing this morning, hang on I’ll check the thermometer in the kitchen… 57°f, not good that.G

Did some Facebooking. For a long time.

Checked the emails. Two of the gals that are concerned about my pamphagous eating habits offered advice. Bless their cotton socks.

Then got the bath running and perfumed.

Good soak, during which I listened to the local radio, snow forecast for high ground today. Not a lot it said.

Dried off well, medicated the sickly parts of my immense blubbery body that were in need. Checked the taps were not left on, put the towels in the airing cupboard, cleaned the bath, sink and taps, then adorned my Titanic torso with the day clothes.

JaneOld 01

A young Sister Jane

Rang Sister Jane while I was making a cuppa. Had a natter. Told her I’d doctored and sent a photograph of her earlier, and sent it to her via email, from when she was about two years of age.

I hope that cheers her up a bit.

Got the laptop out of sleep mode and checked the rest of the emails.

Realised I’d left my bob-cap in the WC, went to retrieve it and found I’d left the heater on again. Lovely and warm in there now, Tsk!

I got CorelDraw opened, and started a graphicalisation I’d been hoping to start for ages.

NCCwalk01I was checking some old stuff for graphics that I did years ago and found a word I’d not used for even longer. Phlyarologist! That describes me to a tee!

The graphicalisationing took me the whole day – and a bit of guilt at getting nowt else done or sorted!

BJ rang me, to confirm he’s coming in the morning to go to the Coffee tenant 01W02meeting with me. no idea what to expect from it.

I got to the WC and no blood from Little Inchy, rare but good that.

Had four Soda bread slices toasted, two with Marmite, Two with Blackcurrant Jam.

Collapsed in the chair and occasionally dozed for short periods, kept waking up with ideas to get something done, but nodded off again each time. Tsk!

So, managed to wake long enough to take me medications, and the odd trip to the bathroom. Things are getting a bit hard in passing again. If it’s the same in the morning, I’ll take a Senna tablet with my morning medications.

Put the A-Team DVD in the telly thingy, and that did the trick.

Nodded off nicely!