Inchcock’s Trip to Nottingham wiv his camera! Comments in bad rhyme!

2Tue28

Inchcock’s Trip to Nottingham

1Mon05

I started out on my trip to town today,

I got through to the lifts, to my dismay,

The elevators all 12-floors below,

I waited patiently before I could go,

I had the scenic view to peruse, though!

1Mon05a

Walking through the link-passage again,

Welcomed by the pouring rain,

Trapped my fingers in the swipe-door, the pain!

I chatted with Angela and Elaine,

Out to get wet, but didn’t complain,

T’was nice to get out of the flats again!

1Mon05b

Off the bus, greeted with a jogging student’s glare,

I just tossed him back, a similar stare,

The rain worked its way, through my jacket,

I wouldn’t mind, but it cost me a packet!

Nottingham City Centre, I wondered why I ever went there!

1Mon06

I remembered though, it was to buy food, starting at Aldi first,

 I hobbled my way down a rainy Glasshouse Street,

At the shop, I bought a lot of fodder, even some Bratwurst,

Then paid, wandered off, for my spending was incomplete,

To Bargain Buys, they’d no potato cakes, that made me curse!

1Mon07

Mansfield Road, rain and Pavement Cyclists abound!

Next a bloke on a Lambretta, I cursed, and moved on,

Nottinghamian’s serenity, smiles, were not to be found,

As to Trinity Square, I was soggily bound!

En route, this bit of Street Art below, I found,

1Mon06a

It lay there, wet, upon the ground,

On Old Street, it was found,

Broken bottles nearby, a battleground.

I moved away, like a limping greyhound!

1Mon08

I got through Trinity Square, left via Kings Walk.

Not many folks about at all?

No one to say hello to, or talk,

Then we had a little rain squall!

1Mon09

Parliament Street had a few more folks around, I have to say,

Unemployed, Students, shoplifters, muggers, no policemen though.

The rain started pouring heavier, not a nice day,

So many eateries in one place, how do they all make any dough? (Hahaha!)

1Mon09b

Down Market Street, I did wobble along,

The rain temporarily having stopped,

I think I sang a joyful song,

The tram gave out a melodic ‘Klong-Klong’,

I might use this photo later, as a ‘Thoughts’ backdrop!

1Mon10

A damp Slab Square, where did the people go?

Is it the rain, are Social Services Inspectors lurking?

Which department are they from, if so?

After illegal immigrants, or claimants working?

A mystery to me, I don’t know.

1Mon13

Nottingham’s cheerless Wheeler Gate, depression flowed,

My target, in Turquoise, the Poundland shop!

Competing coffee shops each side of the road,

Staff sneering at each other, as a goad!

I came out of Poundland, with a massive load,

Two bags on the trolley handles, it went all over the road,

I spent so much, I wondered how much I owed!

1Mon14

To the bus stop home, along South Parade,

Though the tatty, unkempt Slab Square,

A slight Accifauxpas, I’m afraid I made,

The rain started again there,

Got my brolly out, the one for which £10 I paid,

It fell to bits, and to be right and fair,

  I couldn’t bend down, so I left it there!

1Mon14a

Over the Slab Square, to the King Street/Long row junction,

Where the brain struggled to function,

I had a Dizzy Dennis cumulation,

1Mon14b

When the head cleared, and the brain regeared,

With admiration for architect Watson Fothergill grew,

Just looking at his work, my heart cheered.

1Mon14

On the way up Queen Street, the trolley-walker veered,

Very nearly tipping over, that’s something I feard,

It became so unruly, it understeered,

By gum, I thought, this is weird!

Ah, a big-clump of chewing gum from the wheel was cleared,

I must say, I was greatly cheered!

2Tue30

Thank You

WDP 003j2

Inchcockski: Searching for Sanity & Logicality – In bad Rhyme!

Gerald James Timothy Algernon Archibald Inchcock

The Nottinghamian lad knows he is losing it, big time.

Mentally and physically, getting help is hopeless,

 He gets uptight, but he’s completely harmless,

Depressed, untidy, ill and charmless,

He can’t commit suicide, he ain’t got the time,

Even his words don’t properly rhyme!

 

WDP 1Lda

Inchcock: Sadly searching for Sanity

Somewhere, in his tortured labyrinth of a brain,

Lies logic, intelligence, but he can’t find them today,

The brain is active but rarely reliable or decisive,

Also, hesitant, feeble, and the memory’s gone away,

 Some details it retains, and admires he does say,

Mostly about medications, Red Dwarf and Will Hay,

 But his desire, longing for sanity, will not go away!

 

WDP 1L

 However, his efforts, hopes and plans are derisive,

 The mentality-seeking strategies are not conducive,

At least not for 74 years… that’s including today,

He redoubled his spiritual side, and started to pray,

Again in hopes, he’d be semi-sane again, one day,

He talks to his EQ, that’s hyper-sensitive.

 

WDP 1Lcb

He wrote to an Agony Aunt, that was digressive,

 He revealed all, and thought that was impressive!

She said she couldn’t help, and she was sorry,

But why did she throw herself under a lorry?

Inchy thought that was a touch impulsive and excessive!

Regaining logicality, will he ever find a way?

Or remain an idiot, until his dying day?

Another thing, why do his wee-wees always over-spray?

 

This blog was produced without a warning disclaimer.

No claims made for any educationalistical prowess of the author.

Donations and mental assistance will be gladly accepted.

In the event of the writer snuffing it, kindly donate to the Outer Peruvian Pregnant Kangaroo Appreciation Society, Nottingham Branch. 0115 999999.

Thank You

WDPT02L

‘Bonkersness’ An everyday pleasure for old folk!’

2019 April 17

It’s a shock, when you wake up, not feeling unwell,
Take your medications, and rub in the Pain-Gel,
The heart monitor might well need a new Duracell,
You wonder around without clothes on, au naturel,
But you don’t realise, till someone does tell.

You and youngsters are on a different parallel,
You worry about your leaks, do they really smell?
Will someone be waiting for you, down in hell?
Sticks to your dentures do marzipan and caramel!

You’ve a shoebox flat to live in now and dwell.
But you call it an apartment, so your pride can swell!
Retentativeness goes away, you’ll forget how to spell,
Your short term memory will never again excel!
Steps, climbing, will make you fear any stairwell.

Doctors, dentist, you’ll be part of their clientele,
Podiatrists, Opticians, analyst, maybe the as well?
Audiologist too, you’ll not hear your phone or doorbell,
Psychoanalyst, avoid talking about your death-knell,
Well, they have a profit to protect, and service to sell.

We’ll lose our logicality, patience and sense of smell,
And when the time comes for to heaven to travel,
Here’s the really-surprising bombshell,
We can’t take clothes with us, even if they’re brocatelle,
No knick-knacks of gold, silver or tortoiseshell,
But I ain’t got none, anyway – so farewell!
I wonder if I’ll see Dad, Mam, or maybe a pterodactyl?

 

2019 Aug 01

Inchcock Today – Saturday 13th July 2019: Turned out to be a lonely, but betterer day.

2b

2019 July 13

Saturday 13th July 2019

Welsh: Dydd Mawrth Rhagfyr 6

01:15hrs. I stirred awake, and fought off the depressionalistic mood, lingering from yesterday’s calamity of the power-cut, and the ensuing problems it gave me. I pondered on what I could do about the weekend meal for Josie. After some consideration, I decided that I will not have the time to get down into Sherwood to get some potatoes and back again. I tried instant cheesy mash with added onions, well burnt in the oven after mixing, a couple of weeks ago, and Josie said she enjoyed it, as I recall. So I’ll try that again. This should give me time to get the blog updating done, and maybe some photo adding and TFZ Facebooking as well.

The wee-weeing needs arrived later than usual. They normally come within seconds of waking up.  I escaped the warming but uncomfortable grip of the second-hand, £300, c1968, rusty, rickety, grotty-beige coloured, sometimes working recliner, got my balance quickly enough and a few paces to the surprisingly well filled overnight EGPWWB (Emergency Grey Plastic Wee-Wee Bucket), and had a releasing of a WYSAOWW (Weak-Yet-Spraying-All-Over-Wee-Wee).

WDb 128.0.0 During the emptying of the bladder, I got a sensation that I imagine is what myiasis must feel like; worms wriggling about from the innards? It stopped along with the termination of the process.5Sat01

I took the bucket to the kitchen and got it emptied and sanitised. I returned to the Junk-Room-Two, and as I was struggling with the sock-glide, I noticed how odd the right leg looked. It doesn’t come out well in the photo I took. But I seemed to have many extra spider veins on show above the knee. It reminded me 6Sat03of an old map. Haha!

Then I spotted signs of some nocturnal itching on the lower part of the leg. I cannot remember scratching at it at all. As indeed, I cannot recall any visits to the Emergency Grey Plastic Wee-Wee Bucket, that was so full this morning. 6Sat02Perhaps one or more of the blood papsules had burst. Then again, there were no signs of any bloodied paper towels about or in the bin, anywhere? Mmm!

I did the health checks, DIA 74, SYS 58, Pulse 91 and Temperature 34.2°c. Took the medications and made a brew of tea, and took it with me to the computer. Only to find that… once again.

Virgin (4a)

It came back on, but it was so slow. This happens so often nowadays with Virgin Media, and is so angrynoying! Humph!

6Sat01I spent such a long time sorting the flipping internet out and working in a fashion again, the mug of tea went cold on me!

I popped back to make another brew. While the kettle boiled, I had another wee-wee. This time of an ELDOP (Extra-long-Drawn-Out-Persistent) mode. Another change in style. I don’t know what to expect each time I utilise the 5Sat02Emergency Grey Plastic Bucket! Tsk! A life-saver sometimes this bucket is!

I took a ‘blind’ picture out of the new kitchen windows. That is light & view-blocking, have glass that cannot be reached for cleaning. camera-hating wide ledges that make it necessary for step-ladders to be used and fallen off of, to take a photo below, or look to see if any emergency vehicles are outside, in the rare event that I can hear the fire alarm when it activates. Incidentally, I can’t hear the new intercom either, when someone calls to be allowed in. This might be fun on Tuesday when the INR nurse is due!

WDb 128.0.0 When I got back to the computer, Colin Cramps paid me a visit and stayed for a while distorting the muscles in the leg and foot, and testing my pain-resistance almost to the full. Being in such pain, reminded me about yesterday’s Porcelain Throne agony, and I fetched and took an extra Senna tablet with the tea.

Next time the wee-wee was back to the ELDOP (Extra-long-Drawn-Out-Persistent) style. In the time it took to pass, the morning had gotten lighter, and my moustache grew a bit. Hahaha!

Damned weekend again, here we go with Virgin…

Virgin 128.0.0

Somehow or other, I avoided psychasthenia, putting up and coping with the jumping about fingers, and shoulder, and Mr Fries best efforts to knacker my plans, I got the updating finished and posted off. Phew!

6Sat03aI found myself chatting away with Koala Katie and Scruffy as I was carrying my next visit to the bucket. Another change in style again. This time it was a WYSAOWW (Weak-Yet-Spraying-All-Over-Wee-Wee).

It’s a good job there is no CCTV camera in the flat while I am talking to the pets. Hehe!

Got the ablutions done. There was a programme on Radio Four Extra. It was the last radio programme ever, to get more listeners, than anything on TV did on the same day! The science fiction programme was written by BBC producer Charles Chilton. From 1953, when it was broadcast on the old BBC Light Programme, which became BBC Radio Two. By gum, it took me back listening to that while I shaved and had a shower!

I could see the back yard at Brookfield Place where Dad and I lived at the time. His homemade cobbling bench out in the yard next to the railway viaduct, the tin bath up on the wall next to the yard-brush, the pigeons and sparrows swooping down for the food Mrs Wright gave then each day, the sparrows being too quick for the pigeons. The outside toilets and coal houses. Poor Mr Holmes, Chrissie and Rover. Ah, we had nowt, but it was a good life! (Well, not really, but it sounds it). Hehe!

I called at Josie’s, to find out what time she fancied having her meal. But no answer.

I sent some pictures to the Pinterest site, then got on with this blog. After a while, I nipped to see Josie again, no reply.

Back to the blogging for an hour or so, then called on Josie once more. She heard the chimes and answered. We had a doorstep, rumourmongering, tittle-tattle, conversation. She let me gripe on about yesterday’s mayhem. She’s been out all day, and knew nothing of it, but was sympathetic, bless her. She does not want any fodder today, she is going out with her Sisters, but tomorrow at 12:00hrs will suit her fine. So it will be! Farewells and back to the computer to update to here. Then, onto TFZer and Facebook photo galleries updating.

Oh, sod it!

Virgin (4a)

6Sat29The nosh was prepared. I purposely used the old large plastic dish, as the hands and fingers, well, the shoulders and leg as well, were making frequent performances of dancing, jiggling, stamping (the leg) and shaking. So I thought I might cope better with the big bowl, in the event of there continued unruliness! I find it harder than ever to manage when I am feeling so exhausted. The flavour was not so good with the bacon, but the chilli-con-carni was delightful. The overall rating was 5/10.

I put on a Jonathan Creek DVD. After several dropping offs and wakenings, then I gave up. And it was early even for me. But the lack of sleep over the previous disastrous few days, I thought I might be too overtired to sleep – but no. I was off in the land of nod, dreaming a lot, but sleeping for over six hours! Great!