INCHIE TODAY: Tuesday 7th March 2023

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Starting with a bit of a laugh from Inchie

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I think I spent more time today out of it – than in?
Problems with the bank (unsorted), WordPress (ongoing),
CorelDraw (a night & daymare), Catheter Kathleen’s
Accoutrements (Sorted by Carer Carole-Anne), the start
of Trotsky Terence and the lurgy; a combined, concerted
attack that was still in full flow this morning. (Wednesday). 
Multitudinous Memory Blanks and many periods for which
I have not yet made a name to use for it. It’s hard to
explain as well. But I’ll try;

 ❶: Over perhaps a four-hour period, during which two carers called, and several times I forgot what they had just said and what I was saying and going to say in reply.
❷: My mood went from euphoria to depression within seconds and kept alternating for a few minutes? (This has happened a couple of times over this last week, and this is the second session of it this week?
❸: The mind blanks and freezes can last for seconds or hours?.
❹: Sometimes I am so positive about something – certain, sure…
Until five minutes, or hours, days later, and the doubts, dithering and then the oscillating begins.
❺: Questioning my own decisions. Loathing my actions sometimes…
Momentarily engulfing bigger problems I have…
❻: Then, any stage or condition of mind may take over (worryingly)
This can vary from a ‘Sod-Em-all’, ‘Why bother?’, ‘No one is bothered’, to a newish standard for me. ‘What can I say?’ ‘What can I do?…
❼: Which always turns into a self-loathing mode, frustration, or a hated, pathetic, dreaded Dracula-Depression.

If the end is really, nigh…
Why should I wonder why?
My depression I’d like to transmogrify…
My brain & logic, to reunify,
Or would it be best to just die?
My moustache, with indigo dye?
Either way, would there be an outcry?
Or, take some CBD or eat some nautili?
I asked for help, do I get a reply?
I’m losing it quicker as time goes by…
No good luck, fortune or stimuli!
Sleep: I’m not getting much shuteye,
Failures, bad luck; no shortage have I!
Should I eat Spinach, like Popeye?
But no, in vitamin K it’s too high!
Banned for me, like sprouts & broccoli…
Cabbage, grapefruit, at least I know why,
What can I do: Whatever I try…
But I’ll not let myself sink, mope or cry…
What to have to eat? (I give a sigh!)
Worrying, my weight’s getting so high!
Apache potatoes, & a lemon cream pie?
My gluttony, I cannot rectify,
The Catheter hangs down painfully from my thigh,
Although, what the heck does that signify?
We’ll never know… bye-bye.
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Photos of the day with the odd bit of comment.

Crisp-coloured day pouch.

Not the foggiest idea now; why I took this one?

Nor this one, but there may have been a witty idea drifting about that I could use... but it escaped!

Aha! The Ocado order arrived.
Marmite!
Fullish cupboard?
Been after trying this for ages.
Spring Water stockpile?
Apache potatoes.
Good looking and tasting, too!

A smidge bloodier?

Afternoon clouds.
Very nice…
Absolutely gorgeous close-up!
Do you see a duck’s or snake’s head?

Later…
Could be from another planet.
These three had another sun showing up on the photo?
Or did they?

Sunset starting…

Reflection… or whatever you call it…

Dang it, I had to visit the Porcelain Throne
Thus the flow started…
nine more visits before midnight!.
ARGH!

The last views of the Sundown…

Fare Thee Well!

I think Carers Choe, Anne=Mrie, Sam and erm... er… Charly did for me today. So many blanks in the memory.

State of the pouches colourisationings today…

A one on the scale – Perfect!

1.5 Grrreat!

Whoops! Bottom Grade is not good; 7

acci-whoopWell, fancy that!

TTFN

INCHIE TODAY: Saturday 25th February 3023

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Sorry, no text, time, pains or Dementia Doreen.

Things are not good. Cheers!

INCHIE TODAY: Sunday 19th February 2023

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WELL, SNIPPETS, ANY WAY…

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Today was possibly, maybe, perhaps, conceivably, feasibly perhaps, I imagine, I dare say without too much doubt (although this may be debatable), it is plausibly my worst day since being born, then years later, finding out from the midwife that mater’s first words and action as the accoucheuse lady handed me to mother in a bloodied pillow slip.

This is Genuine; Mother also admitted it years later.
Telling me that she took to me later.

“I don’t want it; throw it in the Trent!” Then dropped her fag ash from her Park Drive all over me.” Not one of the best starts to life, but now I’m nearing the end of it; it dawns on me that nothing seems to have changed?

Ah, life’s been good to me”

Not much of Diary again, sorry. I even had a roughly three-hour spell of total memory loss, a Mind-Blank, if you like. Mind you, when I came back into ersatz reality, the sunset was just starting, and I spent about two hours photographing the sun and skies… I’m just addicted to the beauty of it. Not a lot I can remember, my scrawled notes are not of much use, I’m afraid.

Anyway, here I go…

Up around 06:15hrs, and realised that the need for the porcelain Throne was due. I got the night pouch off of the .
Hastened to the Throne and a messy job it was again.

To the kitchen to take these three terrible photographs of the view.

Sorry about this…
Not good at all…

Made up the waste bags, a brew and Carer Jozef arrived. He was obviously running behind and wanted and or needed to press on with his rounds. So I did not engage him in any gossiping. Nice lad.

Made a start on updating yesterday’s blog. The pouch was filling up and needed emptying a few times more than usual… but every single time I bent down to open the valve for emptying, I went light-headed, and Dizzy Dennis paid a visit. This went on all day and is the same now at 23:00hrs

Then, the mind blank arrived. Not the foggiest memory, but a Carer had been and signed the log… who or what happened? I know not.
Also, my little finger was hurting and the left side of the jaw too???
A tumble? Had I walked into a doorframe again? Mmm?

I remember Carer Caroline arriving, and I found out that I’d not given her a torch, so did so. Lovely gal!

Things came back as normal as they can be for me around sunset time. And boy, did I get fascinated by the changing sky… Yes, I did! Hehe!
Here are all the Sunset photographs I took; I think I spent ages, with a few interruptions:

First shot

Clouds move all the time…

Sun lowering…

Coming through…

Nearly through…

Took a close-up

Getting brighter…

Ah, the colour comes…

Darn it! Had to go empty the pouch.
Got back in time to catch these beauties…

Wonderful!

Wider shot…

Picturesque…

Globble-rots, off to use the Throne again.
All changed again…

Awesome, the sun is not gone yet…

She has now, but she was still lighting the clouds…

Grrreat effects!

Daunting…

Hello, the sun’s showing again?.
How does that work, then?.

Outstanding!

Another change? I love this!

Mother Nature…

All gone dark… but not for long….
Horison lights up?

The strip narrows.

Then goes…

The high sky goes grey.

Horizon strip white…

Well, a bluey-pink. Hehe!

Nightie-night…

Hello, hello. Can you see this?

I do believe I’m just seen and taken a shot of Jupiter?

 Putting the camera away, Carer Richard came in.
I’ve missed the lad. He seemed in a decent mood and looked better than he did last week, I’m pleased to report.
He said he’d change the day catheter in the morning and then add the night pouch to .
I feel like I spoke a lot, but can’t recall what about some sort of moaning, most likely. Grumpy Old Men do that!

I had a handful of fries done in the air-fryer, then a pot noodle with tons of seasoning in it. Dunked some bread in it.

Sleep came easily…
As did the shooting awakes with a jerk!
HUMPH!

INCHIE TODAY: Saturday 18th February 2023

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Today, I received two letters. Neither of which exactly perked me up, cheered me up or made me sing or yodel with pure joy.
But first, I’m afraid this is another rushed blog. Due to the hours spent sorting out the mail in hate form of four A4 pages of the very small print of details required by the hospital for the upcoming operation on the Prostate that needed to be filled in. But, I made a right mess of it.
THe Carer who came pointed out that I could do it on the Internet.
So, I did, and that took me over an hour and a half to get right! Had to ring Sister Jane to confirm her address and telephone number. But got it done and tried to send it, but it wouldn’t have it.
So I double-checked that I’d filled everything in properly.
Which, of course, I hadn’t! There was a disclaimer box that had to be clicked on. So, I clicked on it. Another messy day!
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I got out of the recliner, caught my balance, and went off to the porcelain Throne. Messy! Very Messy!
Checked the batteries and made sure the Fuji was working.

Took a snap from the window.

Stripped t get ready to go to get the ablutions done.
The toes had lost their brown colouring but were more twisted and swollen.

07:40hrs: I started the Ablutionings.
My teeth were cleaned, my nose cleared, and I shaved while I was standing in a bowl of soapy water and Dettol. 
Eye drops in, medicated certain delicate areas. I actually felt worn out; the whole session took ages. I took a photo of the wrist alert bands

Right wrist...
Left wrist… Which meant after looking at the clock, that I’d spent
erm… 08:55 now, started at 07:40hrs – that was good for me!
Smug-Mode Engaged!

The two errant toes were stinging a bit.

Blimey sunshine out!

Carer Adele arrived a little late, not that it mattered in the slightest to me.
She’s collected the two letters from the door box on coming in.
One was a bill from Easy-Link.


The other (above). was the dreaded questionnaire from the Woodthorpe Hospital. I have to fill it in and register before they can see me.
It cost me over four hours to get it all done!

Carers came and went, but I worked like a good un trying to get this blog done… I had to keep stopping for the carers visits, phone calls, answer emails that came in, emptying the daub pouch of the catheter, and forever adjusting the tubing that was giving me some right bother; the bleeding had not stopped since the first accidental pull on the tube. Not bleeding badly, more like a little leak. But it keeps drying, and when I move, the dried blood cracks and starts flowing again; Humph!

Nothing to eat yet. Not that I want anything. I did nibble and dunk a few biscuits each time I made a brew… although five of the mugs of tea went cold cause I was concentrating on doing the graphics.

Tea time, and I went to make another brew, intent on making sure I drank this one. I didn’t. Cause I espied a slimmer of light on the horison – Aha… Sunset was coming, methinks!.

I took a closer shot.

Over the next half-hour, I took several photos of the wonderful sky until the short sunsetting had gone.

Finally….
Ta-Ta Sunshine!

Get something to eat now… I hope!

A much-doctored bowl of veg soup.
I was halfway through it when the new Carer Zika arrived.
He was late arriving, and muggings here forgot he’d not been.
I am a plonker! He’s a nice lad.
With chatting with him as he got the medications sorted, I also forgot all about the night pouch that needed fitting to the on the .

He took the waste bags and checked the taps for me as he departed.

Then I got the dish, and cutlery washed and settled down in the second-hand, £300, charity shop bought, crumb-retaining, microorganism-microbe producing, gungy, moth-eaten, beige-coloured, non-working, bacillus encouraging, incommodious, Haemorrhoid Harold testing, c1968 recliner.

Another much-interrupted sleep. For I had to keep checking and emptying the smaller day bag, if needed, overnight. Lost count of the times I had to get up and free the urine into the bucket. Tsk! I think seeing a new face and nattering a little helped me forget about the night pouch.

I also got a visit from Dizzy Dennis every time I bent down to undo the release valve. A little disconcerting they were.

TTFN

INCHIE TODAY: Monday 13th February 2023

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Lots of hassle today – what about I cannot say yet.
combined with Doreen Dementia’s and Sweet Morpheus’s ploy to ensure my getting very little sleep, a dark depression brought on by the day’s events that I will reveal later on in the week; I am at the lowest point in the contentment stakes that I’m been since, well many a year.
Another cut-short thought circumstances beyond my control (I’m getting a lot of these days lately) in detail diary I fear.

According to my notepad, I got up at 04:00hrs, failing to sleep again. After getting the kitchen mopped and making a brew and Carer Richard arrived. Still looking a little under the weather; bless him. I hope he’ll be alright later on. I tried to cheer him up a smidgeon.

Took this shot of the foggy morning…

Stayed misty all day long.


Went to refill the one-litre water bottles from the cheaper 2-litre ones… Whoopsiedangleplop! The cat shot off of the bottles, hit me in the middle of my forehead, and generally soaked me and the floor as ~I dropped it, and it spun around on the floor, liberally distributing two litres of water.

Mopped the floor and put the togs in the laundry bag.

Had a visitor and got all agitated afterwards.
On the Computer.
Carer Sam arrived to do the checks and medications.

Then four lines of scribbled notes happened, and it said it was 13:30hrs. No idea what I wrote, but @I must have been stressed to write that bad, even for me. Hump!

Seems I took a picture of the Chestnut Way car parking.
And somehow missed it?

I went back to the computer to get Sunday’s blog completed.
Took the above shot through the sliding windows and balcony ones.

Says here that ~I was feeling drained again. Not sure if that meant tired or I emptied Cathy Catheter’s Pouch.

Remembered that the Blood ~pressure has to be taken four times a day now. I created the graph near the top and put it on here later in the evening when I felt so tired.

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Had a nosey about what to eat, and I ended up with a Sweet & Sour Noodles pot. I’ll not try them again.

Carer Kara came to serve me. Medicines and safety checks. Nice to see her, she doesn’t come very often… well, as I’d like. Hehehe!

I was fighting off falling asleep – Marvellous, innit? Get yer head down, and you can’t sleep, give up, get up, and you try working on the blog, and you’ll fall asleep in the computer chair! Not only that, you knock a bottle of spring water off the shelf, and Back-Pain Brenda kicks off when you bend to retrieve it. Fed-up? Me?

Fed-up, I may have said that already, I went to put the kettle on, and what a moon was showing up in the early night sky – Grrreat

Just look at the two-tone colour of it!

The last two above were taken much laterer.
Not so good, are they?

Carer Richard arrived as I was making a pan of stew… of sorts and dishing it out into a bowl. Richard kindly waited for me to finish this before , and gave the medications when the meal was readied. He left me with the tray balanced on my bulbous belly – checked the taps etc., and took the waste bag on his way out.
I ate the rather sad as-it-turned-out meal. Got the pots washed, and with the four-pronged walking stick, Metal Mickey in my hands, I went to lock the front door… well, it’s the only external door. Hehe! ,

Back into the second-hand, £300, charity shop bought, crumb-retaining, microorganism-microbe producing, gungy, moth-eaten, beige-coloured, non-working, bacillus encouraging, incommodious, Haemorrhoid Harold testing, c1968 recliner.  

And Zzzz!

INCHIE TODAY: Friday 10th February 2023

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A quickie one here. Ran out of time, patients, and concentration and had so many calls and visits, but not the ones I wanted.

CATHY CATHETER…
Behaved kindly enough to me today.

Early morning photographicalisations…

Late Moon.

Carer Kara called. Meds given. Tea. Email from Iceland
Got onto starting this blog.
Calls (three) from the Doctor’s surgery about BP taking.
Lack of INR Blood Tests for three weeks? I mentioned
my problems getting to the surgery.

Cathy Catheter started causing problems, and I lost an hour trying to get the tube into a less painful position.

Porcelain Throne activities are very messy. More time is lost cleaning up after every visit.

Burnt the stew and lost another hour-plus cleaning and salvaging the saucepan and stovetop. Hot tap left running again!

I’ve really no idea what took place for the next five hours – Not the foggiest. A mind-blank of mega proportions until the evening’s wonderful sunset, and I sort of ‘found myself’ leaning out of the kitchen window, taking this shot of the view on offer.

Ni idea which carers called… I think Carer Joseph and Adele later. But am not sure, as a second blank spell hit me.

I woke Saturday morning at a loss memory-wise of Friday.

Found these late-evening photos.