Impure Inchy – Thursday 4th March 2021 Diary

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Thursday 4th March 2021

Spanish: Jueves 4 de Marzo de 2021

23:40hrs: I removed my over-flabbily-bellied body from the c1968 recliner and utilised the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee Bucket). A short sharp affair, with a lot of CMD (Cessational Micturition Dribble) to follow.

No messing about, I got on the computer to create a template for today’s blog. Starting with doing a few graphics on CorelDraw. But, I didn’t get too far, the call to the Porcelain Throne arrived, so, off to the wet room. Incidentally, Cartilage Cathy was a lot kinder to me this morning.

It seemed to me that the daily PTDDSB (Porcelain Throne, Daily-Domination-Stakes- Battle) for supremacy in the evacuation was a close thing. Still, a comeback from Constipation Konrad had curbed the rampant messy tendencies of Trotsky Terence for once! So, I had a go at the crossword puzzle as I waited for things to kick-off. Just as yesterday, I didn’t solve a single clue! (Well, I’m consistent, if not capable. Hehehe! The movement started slowly and stayed that way, but no pain or bleeding, and as I said, it was a lot less mess to clean up. I still had to refill the tank by hand though, I think the problem is the fluffy too-thick toilet roll paper.

Back to the grahicalisationing, I went. Then made-up and started this template. Which took me ages to get this far with. Then, I went on to update the Wednesday Diary, at long last. I got it updated fully, emailed the link and went on the WordPress Reader section. Which I enjoyed considerably. Pinterested a couple of photographs, the read and replied to the WP comments that had come in. Some witty puns and quips came on this Thursday.

I was about to start collating the advance templates and realised the hours had shot by; it was time to get the ablutions tended to. As is usual with me, I got into the kitchen and got myself sidetracked once more.

I decided to get the hand-washing done first. But and however – guess who had left the hot water tap (faucet) to run cold? Yes, pickle-brain Inchcock had struck-again! Gawd-blimey, I this far too often! Hence decision had to be made (another Inchcock problem area!) My EQ told me there nothing to do but press on handwashing boiling the water in the kettle and saucepan, for more Whoopsiedangleplops were on their way! He also called me a name, a naughty one!

So, the half-hour or so handwashing exercise took me nearly two hours! Not to mention the scolding of two fingers fetching the kettle to the sink… Oh, I’ve said it! It’s a good job that I was in a slightly better mood today! I washed the long-sleeve jumper, the jammie-bottoms and the pair of long bamboo diabetic socks. The washed ones from yesterday were not fully-dry enough to put on today, so I got a couple of 100% short-ones to adorn after the ablutions to wear.

Then, as I checked the dryness of the other things that were hanging above the kitchen window, with perfect-timing, Peripheral Pete went into an involuntary right-leg Neuropathic Schuhplattler dance routine! This caused me to drop the coat-hangars and the washing I had in my hand. Belt Cathy Cartilages knee against the floor cupboard, and hit my head against the heater getting back up again!

I made a start on moving the stuff back into the cupboard, but soon lost interest!

My new found emotions of satisfaction, semi-contentment and renewed hopes sank without a trace! I took some painkillers and moped my way to the wet room, leaving the clothes where they had fell on the floor, and swearing a little still, got to the wet room, totally uninterested in what I was there for! Pissed-off would be a quicker way of putting things!

Had I been aware of what was waiting for me, I wouldn’t have gone in! The worse Ablution session in months!

Ablutionalisticalisationing Report:

  • I realised there was no hot water to be gleaned from the sink tap for shaving! But felt sure I would manage using the hottish water from the shower-head without any bother (What an idiot!)
  • Have you ever had to keep going to the other side of the wet room, and with Peripheral Pete shaking me about like a good un, repeatedly, bring the shower-head, which only just reaches the sink, and spraying the tepid water all over yourself and the room? It’s not easy! The cleaning up afterwards wasn’t either!
  • The de-nasalising went well. No water needed, you see! One dropsy only!
  • The teeth-cleaning had a bit of discomfort.
  • Then the shaving began. I had to keep emptying the sink of the water that went too cold, turning up the thermostat, and dial, to get as hot that I could from the control panel, but it wasn’t scorching enough, even then.
  • The whole shaving job was farcical in the extreme. Although having said that, there were only five dropsies! A few little nicks and one cut under the chin. One the throat, two in the neck-hole, and one on the cheek.

I got belated Health Checks done next. The Boot’s, made in China Sphygmomanometer’s SYS reading was fantastically low! Grrreat!

At least I think it is; hang on, I’ll check on Mr Google later on.

The in Hong Kong produced, Chinese Harpin Xian Di contactless thermometer reading was, I think, a smidge high, but well down on yesterdays worrying high of 37.9°c – 100.22°f.

Since the side-effect-ridden AstraZeneca Covid-19 vaccination was given to me a week last Saturday, SYS has also been higher, its the lowest reading today than for ages. I think I might be getting confused here, between the SYS and the temperature? Well, fancy that!

I found an NHS site on Google, where you can put in your reading for SYS and DIA, and you get an instant show of where you stand on the chart, with a black cross! Proof that I was right to worry when the SYS went up to 180 five days ago, well, that was well in the red area!

Gotten Himmel! Look at the time! What happened, where did it go?

I’d better close down and get my pre-planned, easy, tasty (I was well wrong there!) meal prepared. I’m afraid the beautiful looking Iceland bought tin of tomatoes was terribly bland, tasteless, watery. Savourless and unappetising. These Don Holio chopped tomatoes needed a warning giving-out about them for anyone unlucky enough to buy any. The Sainsbury crispy smoked ready-cooked bacon slices were very fatty tasting as well! The last of the sourdough bread saved the meal. A flavour-rating of 4.5/10 was granted. Reluctantly to a degree! Eurgh!

However, and leaving the pots in the sink in cold water to be cleaned when I have some hot water again, in the morning, at first, I was well-pleased that I was in time to watch the channel 11, Tales of the Unexpected episodes.

I stayed awake until the first set of commercials, and Sweet Morpheus visited me, and off into the land of nod I floated.

And slept for four unbroken hours, which was so nice! Ahh!

Irritating Inchie Friday 5th February 2021

And no one better deserving!

Friday 5th February 2021

Italiano: Venerdì 5 Febbraio 2021

02:35hrs:  I woke wearily, unsaddled my over-bellied body from the recliner, caught my balance without, any bother or Whoopsies, and had a wee-wee. Utilising the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee Bucket), it sank in how late I’d risen back to semi-life. And realised that I’d had… Six-Hours of sleep! Yee-Haa! The wee-wee was of the SP (Short-Powerfull) type, followed by a lot of PMAD (Post-Micturition-After Dribbling).

The mind started wandering from one thing to another, as I emptied and cleaned the bucket. But one thing was overriding all others – I wanted, no, needed a mug of tea, so off to the kitchenette and brewed a mug of Glengettie. This thirst, but only for tea, remained with me all morning, by Gawd, I drank so many mugs, it worried me?

Summonings from the innards demanded I rush off to the wet room and pay the Porcelain Throne a visit! So, I did!

A soon as I’d got my bum down on the plastic, I knew this was going to be a session dominated by Constipation Konrad! Things were not going to move easily this time. I tried applying a little pressure, but the pain was overbearing, so I grabbed the crossword book and failed to get any more solutions. Things began, the motion was painful, and oh, so slow with it! Not too messy under the circumstances.

But the cistern was not taking away the contents deposited. Hand refilling several times, and eventually the product was cleared down to the sewers. Belatedly, my EQ warned me of stressful times coming. He was out of sync with the happenings this morning, not like him at all?

I cleaned up and got on with the hemerine Health Checking duties. In doing the body temperature first, making a change with the made in Hong Kong, by the Chinese Harpin Xian Di company, and reliable contactless thermometer. Result: 36.9°c. Fair enough!

Blood Pressure was taken next, on the Boots Sphygmomanometer, manufactured by, ZDEAC (Zhongshan Daguan Electrical Appliance Company Ltd) in Guangdong, China. By gum, the SYS had shot up to 176 from yesterdays low of 130!

I had a quick look at the Covid-19 leaflet that arrived yesterday.

Not than I’m terrible thick (Maybe a little, mind you) but I just couldn’t seem to grasp all of the details.

I went to make another brew, Glengettie Gold this time. (Am I becoming a tea addict? But I prefer t call it tea lover or tea connoisseur. Hehe!)

Then I got diverted from the plan and wobbled off sorting out the handwashing I did yesterday. I checked the clothes I’d hung above the kitchen wall window near the window. That was the maroon, made in Myanmar (Burmese), zip-up jacket, the Pakistani made Cedar Wood Hollow-out Round Neck Acrylic Sweater, and the made in India, Tru-Size pyjama bottoms-lounge pants. Moving them as they were almost dry now.

Checked the made in Turkey, heavy fluffy quilt hanging in the wet room, and moved it onto the stand-up clothes airer in the hallway.

Finally, at last, I got on the computer to download some photographs for use.

Then, off to make another brew, of Thompsons Punjana.

As I was doing so, I noticed the marks coming on the wrist again, that resemble the Clopidogrel allergy ones. I felt the feet giving off the same warm, itchy sensations too? Fortuitously, I had a look in the medications drawers and found a tube of Germolene, and an old Boot’s Derma Care, which I expected to be long out-of-date, but it had six-months use-by life left! No point in my using them before the ablutions and showering, so I took them into the wet room to utilise later on. A touch of good luck there! Smug-Mode-Adopted! Much changes of fortune today, already!

I took a snap of Chestnut Drive below. The car park bit. I caught a reflection of my mush in the mirror, the presence of blood in the anterior chamber of the eye (hyphema). It didn’t seem any worse than yesterday.

Then I started farting around checking the flavourings in the cupboard again. What’s a matter with me? I might use some later. I’ve decided to have a tin of CCC, add peas and the potatoes currently slow-boiling in the crock-pot.

After a while, I decided to try putting in, smoked paprika, and onion salt. I’ll try to get some guidance for next week when the minced beef arrives, and I try to make Chilli-Con-Carne from scratch.

I made another brew of tea, Glengettie, and cracked on with updating the Thursday blog. The ailments had died down, and I soon had it completed. Smug-Mode-Engaged! Posted off the dairy. Pinterested photos then went on Facebook catching-up. Read and replied to WP comments, both of them. (Hehe!) Emailed the link, and went to make yet another brew, Co-op 99 this time.

Had a wee-wee, pleased with the colouration of it, according to the colour guide, it was a healthy wee, at number three! Hehe! Which reminds me, the Gastroenterologist-Urologist Doctor has not called me this last month – why would she, there are plenty of other more suitable names t ca;; me, Hehehehe!

I made another mug of tea, Glengettie!

Another load of paperwork came in! Grumph! More brain testing to be done, and to think I was nervous about being bored in my old age – Hah!

Off to get the ablutions done. The blotch on the left hand is still there, but a lot less noticeable. This is where I took off the Warfarin and Loss of Hearing medical wristbands, and have not seen them since! I ordered some Diabetes, Hearing loss and Warfarin wrist band alerts from Amazon, oh, and some Dettol. One coming Monday, two on 15th, and one between a week on Saturday to Tuesday.

The legs were looking good as I stripped off. I say good, I mean a lot better than they usually do. The welt, raised veins, and blotches seem to have disappeared altogether? Of course, this might seem this way due to my bad cameramanship, or the steam from the wall heater being just switched on? I’ll take another afterwards. I noted that the water retention was no longer a problem? What’s going on here?

The teeth cleaning went painlessly? Another mystery? Shaving made me take another shot of the… this has not been Christened yet has it? Erm… Red-Eye Robert? Worra yer fink? Haha!

I’d sooner not mention how the showering went if yer doesn’t mind. The bruises will soon go, I’m sure. The first real attack from Dizzy Dennis for over a week, caught me off-guard, Tsk!

Drying off, I also noticed, that the new designer legs ankle ulcer was all but gone?

I’m baffled by all this improvement healthwise in things, it’s not natural for me! I’m a bit nervous, not used to it!

I got dressed (well, it seemed a good idea, Haha!) and got the kitchen cleaned and mopped. Back-Pain-Brenda, who I started off when I fell in the shower, was not happy with me at all. Now that, I can understand and live with!)

I got some more updating done to this blog.

I got the meal prepped a bit more. Chilli in the saucepan with the peas, the spuds will soon be ready too. The weariness is dawning, nosh time!

A fair nosh. 7/10 flavour rating.

Inchoate Inchcock Diary – Thursday 4th February 2021

♥ Australian Garden Centre ♥

Thursday 4th February 2021

Hawaiian: Pōʻahā 4 Pepeluali 2021

Good Morning!

01:05hrs. I seemed to wake up more slowly this morning, it took a while to engage the brain. A few moments of vagueness, and utter disinterest in anything, soon passed, and I realised that I’d just had over five hours in the arms of sweet Morpheus, which surprised me a little after the four previous nights of broken, disturbed rest. Maybe things are going to go better today for me? What a stupid thought! My brain was near-fully operational, and the Thought Storms began. Thankfully, the need of a wee-wee broke the trend.

I rose calmly, and carefully from the c1968 recliner, and caught my balance easily enough. Hobbled over to the ‘unused’, overnight nocturnal wee-wee bucket, and boy what a shocker it was! Back to those of last year; Stinging like hell, bursts out for a few seconds, then went into a dribble mode with even worse pain! Silver Lining Search: There was no pre or after dribbling!

Started doing the Health-Checks, with the Blood Pressure on the Boots Sphygmomanometer, manufactured by, ZDEAC (Zhongshan Daguan Electrical Appliance Company Ltd) in Guangdong, China. Great! The SYS was down to 130, it’s never been so low! Dia 83, pulse 79.
The Chinese (Hong Kong) made by Shenzhen Relee Electronic & Technology Co. Ltd, contactless thermometer, gave exactly the same reading as it did yesterday, of 36.7°c. That was pleasing, cause I reckon that is a fair level.

I took the morning tablets. Please note that I did not miss last nights doses! Hehe! About time too!

I turned the computer on to do some graphics, then had a look at the emails. One indicated that L9 bus service is to be cancelled in apart of the Nottingham City Councils efforts to claw back £millions, due to Covid-19. There was an email address to offer our views on the subject, and I sent one. But it will inevitably have to go. Shame, but it can’t be helped.

I went to make a brew of Glengettie, and I got side-tracked (I do tat an awful lot, lately). Into sorting the seasoning cupboard out. Glad to say I’ve now got some various seasonings in hand. Mild chilli, basil, paprika, chives, various types of salts, peri-peri, etc. Soy sauce, balsamic vinegar, Squid sauce, normal and extra-strong matured Marmite (Hehehehe, lovely!), black pepper, too. Shame that Iceland and Sainsbury’s didn’t send me any fresh onions, leeks or shallots. Tsk!

I put the remainder of the mini-potatoes in the crock-pot, and added some chives and sea salt, leaving them to hopefully, marinate. Note how SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley) encouraged me to tip in half the pot of chives? Grumph!

Titivating the fridge, and I came across this whatever it was in the photo on the right? It was snuggled in the door tray, hidden under some pots of milk. I wonder what it was? You have to laugh! Well, I did anyway, during which, I let pains in both eyes, not bad at all, but it worried me. So much that I got the camera to investigate.

It was the subconjunctival haemorrhage in the eye. But it didn’t look so bad as the last time.  I wondered why it was in the right eye this time, but the pictures looked the same as previously? It dawned on me after a while, the Nikon camera, now deceased; I’m afraid, had something called an unmirrored lens… I might be getting myself all confused here? Anyway, I sneezed a few times again, and now both eyes are itching like mad? My typical bad timing, with the vaccination due tomorrow, I don’t want to get in a pickle appointment-wise. Then, of course, Saturday and Sunday, so no help available. The left eye is getting filled with mucus, and making seeing properly difficult as the day goes on.

I went for another painful pee, of the same mode as the first one. And got started on updating the blog from yesterday. I fear many mistakes have been made with the eyes problems. I fear that if Saccedes Sandra comes on as well, I’ll just have to summon help.

It was uncomfortable and Oh, so slow job doing the updating. Got it finished eventually. Posted it off, Emailed the link, Pinterested a photo or two, then went on Facebook catch-up. Hard work seeing things correctly. Went on the WordPress Reader section. Next, I replied to the WP comments.

Then, I did some template adjusting, changed the font, I wanted to widen the main text body, but couldn’t. This might am not allowed on this template, or, as is more likely, I couldn’t remember how to do it. Tsk!

I put the computer into sleep-mode and got some handwashing done. The made in Myanmar (Burmese), maroon zip-up jacket, and the new made in India, Tru-Size pyjama bottoms-lounge pants, are not true-to-size very warm, but comfortable enough with all the heating on full.

Off to get the ablutions tended to. I had a nosey at the eye again, it looks a tad worse than yesterday, and the annoying itching continues. As for the ablutions, well, hardly any problems at all. It was as if I was in a dream! Total all the way through, there were only about six dropsies, nowt knocked over – Grrreat!

Back to the computer, and I saw the thick quilt that I was going to wash earlier. It was where I left it, folded on the clothes airer, so I wouldn’t forget it – but I did! So I set to washing it in the sink, and it was a bit of a job, with it being thicker. I then hung on the shower track in the wet room to dry.

I made a start on the waste bag assembling. And found four letters had been posted, I went off to investigate, one from the NHS – DVT Deep-Vein-Thrombosis Warfarin clinic with the results of the last blood test, the INR was up to 3.4, which is almost spot-on, at last something went right! Yee-Haa!

The next one, was from the City of Nottingham City Police, about the Pegasus listing I presume, I’ve not opened it yet. I must ask Deana if she can help me that one, it needs a lot of living details filling in about Winwood Heights.

Another from the NHS, telling to book an appointment for the Covid-19 Vaccine – this is the third one I’ve had, and the appointments were made last Wednesday, I think it was. Another, telling me the same thing, including a leaflet of what to expect and do at the appointment.

Sister Jane rang, I was in the middle of sorting out the waste bags, and she said she’d ring back. Which she did! I got the job cleared up, and she rang back with impeccable timing, as is her way. Haha! We had a good chinwag, Pete chipping in. He’s doing so well with his Big C – Super! We even managed a few laughs and a spot of reminiscing, too!

I got the waste bags on the walker and limped along through flat looby, to the end of the lift lobby, and into the chute room – not an uneventful little poddle as it turned out…

As I fumbled a little to get in without scratching the new paintwork with the trolley-guide wheels, the blasted git of a bad timer, SSS gave me a bashing at the worst possible moment! Just as I opened the cover and reached down to pick the bag up, SSS made me clout the back of my elbow joint on the cast iron metal!

I’m writing this a couple of hours later than when it happened, and the elbow still hurts! Grigglesbogworthy!

Of course, it didn’t bother me really.

I went down ion the lift to take the recycling stuff to the bin. The flooring chaps were working in the lobby, and the main front doors were out of bounds, so I went through the caretaker’s access room, and out to the big bin.

Back up, had a mug of Thompsons Punjana tea, rubbed some Phorpain Gel on the bashed up elbow, and top, the midday medications, olive oiled the lugholes nibbled some Pretzel pieces, the Honey, Mustard and Onion flavoured ones. Gawd they’re good!

I then investigated the chances of getting a Sainsbury order done for next Monday or Tuesday. I see what’s what and available, back in a bit folks…

Few options on slots I’m afraid, I had no choice than to have a late one – Fangnations! Wednesday 10th February 2021 – 18:30>19:30hrs. Still, I can look forward to getting some of the ordered minced beef to make the Chill-Con-Carne with, hopefully, some leeks, parsnips, onions and carrots to go with it this time. I’ve blocked substitutes on the veg, else I might have ended up their Sainsbury’s famous Super-Substitutes and got things like; a cheese knife, pickled walnut and/or some postage stamps.

The weariness is coming on. I put the delivery on the Google Calendar. Added some diced onions on the Iceland order for Saturday.

I got an email telling me that the damned charges for the mobile are going up again! That was nice… Grumphs!

A year or so ago, I called in the shop in Victoria Centre to cancel the contract… and the smooth, villainous, young Arthur Daily type assistant manager, said they could put me on a contract with free calls and texts, for a sim, at £15 a month. Naturally, I fell for the con. It’s gone up three times since, and a limit on free phone calls has come into play. Well, I don’t have Network Envy!

Going to get some nosh sorted, I’m fading fast here. Haha!

I took this snap from the kitchenette window, I’ve forgotten why, but there was a reason. (Tsk!)

Then I set to serving the meal up on the tray. And a decent one it was. The turkey slices were supposed to be Chilli-flavoured, some folks would have been disappointed, but the mild taste suited me down to the ground… Which is where some of the meat ended up when SSS gave me a rattling good shaking as I was getting it out of the packet! Cringleblastit! A worthy flavour-rating of 7.5/10, though. The sourdough bread had kept well, and as delicious with the Lurpac loaded on the slices! I noticed the bag’s writing had changed, and now states ‘Slow-fermented Starter-Dough’, what does that mean? I’ll get time eventually to ask Mr Google.

I washed the pots, and took the evening medications (that’s two nights remembering to take them on the trot, now! Hehe!).

Settled to watch two episodes of ‘Tales of the Unexpected’, on Freeview channel 11. Wonderfully, I flaked-out at the first set of adverts and was in the hands of Sweet Morpheus… Ahhh!

Recalcitrant Inchcock: Saturday 23rd January 2021 Diary

TFZer, at her holiday home

Saturday 23rd January 2021

Welsh: Dydd Sadwrn 23ain Ionawr 2021

23:50hrs: I woke to Thought Storms that must have been in a dream because they were very active straight away. Fears, concerns, anxious concerns that came and went for ages.

I needed a wee-wee shortly, and after getting IP from the recliner, catching my balance and getting to the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee Bucket), I found it nearly full! Still, there was no rush, things didn’t feel urgent. I took the bucket with me to the wet room, used the WC, for a WDWW (Weak-Dribbling-Wee-Wee) and cleaned and disinfected the bucket. While doing this, I thought I could smell burning, and remembered yesterdays incinerated Chilli-Con-Carne in the pan.

I’d left it soaking, and went to investigate to see if anything was salvageable. Amazingly, the last few bits of fodder came off quickly? And the saucepan was usable again! Made a brew, and took the morning medications.

Going to get the computer on to get the Templates started, and I returned to the wet room, to us the Porcelain Throne. Constipation Konrad was thrashed by Trotsky Terence in this mornings DESB (Daily-Evacuation-Stakes-Battle). What a messy affair! Much refilling of the tank, before the great-dollop of evacuated product, was cleared.

Back to the computer and the now gone cold mug of Glengettie, and made a start on finishing off yesterdays diary. It was hard work again, with interruptions from SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley). Got it done, posted off, and Pinterested a few photos.

I made up a template for today. Then went onto Facebooking catch-up. The WordPress Reader section next and emailed the link.

I then tried to get the advance Templates done. This was even more frustrating, cause Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters kept going off-line, and causing me to make many errors and mistakes, many not noticed at first, and I had to keep going back top check earlier work done. Confusing, innit? I persevered…

Sixteen-hours after getting up. I got the temp[lates finished! I’d cream-crackered now.

The scribbled notes and few photos I took will help me remember bits, in the morning… he says hopefully. It may be a little muddled, though!

I turned off the computer to allow it to cool down a smidge, I went to do the ablutions.

I can’t recall things much because when I got around to updating this, it was 22 hours later. I’ll do me bestest. The knees before and legs after the shower were photographed.

I made a brew of Glengettie and restarted the computer. It might have been a mistake turning it off, cause now the internet was slower than ever, and CorelDraw kept playing up and needed restarting frequently.

Mistakes were being made in the Template creations, and much time was lost going back after finding a mistake to correct it. I expect many cock-ups will still have been missed.

Hours later, I got increasingly frustrated with mu wrongdoings, cocking things up, and forgetting, rechecking… Not good! I went to make another brew and took these photographs of the snow shower. The wind was blowing the light snow in all directions, but the shots I took some through the window, a lot of snow came into the room! Haha!

The templating was returned to, and I persisted for several more hours until the need for the Porcelain Throne arrived. Off I poddled

‘Never, in the field of human ablutionisationing have I had such a massive evacuation!’ Much bleeding.

I opened MS Word to find one I needed from my ‘Future Use’ dictionary, and the bloody layout had changed on its own again!

I lost an hour or more trying to get it back to how I wanted it. But had to make do, as it was beyond me this new layout.

It was a slow slog getting the templates all done. If it wasn’t MS Word, CorelDraw or the Internet being incredibly sluggish, there was problem delaying me all day! It wrangled me so much, Duodenal Donald kicked-off.

The snow fell again. A slight covering and the wind with it was more violent now.

I decided to make another brew and take some more photographs. But was not going to make the same mistake as in the earlier shoot – I took all of these pictures through the window.

I tried using the Nikon camera, but it was beyond salvation.

I’ve not had a good day, really.

Eventually, I got the templates done – I’m too tired to double-check them at the moment. No doubt whatsoever that many errors will be found when I do get around to checking them.

I got a pastie put in the oven warming, and the CCC and meatballs, with added sliced capsicum, in the saucepan, I was determined not to burn it this time.

I returned and turned off the computer. I was wrecked mentally. All the things that went wrong, the time lost, and I didn’t mention the wee-weeing, did I – it was repetitive!

  : I heard a thud, or loud, dull plop like sound, that had come from the kitchen area. Panic-Mode-Engaged, I hastened to have a look at what had happened. It had to be something severe or dangerous if I heard the noise without the hearing aids in?

A fresh burning smell welcomed me as I got in the kitchen.

Oh, dearie me! After a few seconds in Sherlock Holmesian Mode, I found that the beef pastie in the oven had exploded! The minced beef, onion, gravy and pastry was glued to the door and all over the stove! Crying was one option! On the bright side, the place smelt like the old roadside cafes used to! Hehehe! 

I scraped off as much of the gunk as I could. Then got the Cif oven cleaner spray, and did my best (failing miserably) to get the oven and door cleaned. I even remembered to keep stirring the Chillie-Con-Carne, as I tried to clean the oven, so the saucepan wouldn’t burn!

There was no repeated muttering, spitting out of the terrible parentage-questioning word. Bile growing in the stomach. Depression, or feeling sorry for myself, at all.

I got the other remaining pastie from the fridge then dropped it in the white plastic eating-bowl (dare not use the oven again). Then poured the pan full of CCC over it. Well, another surprise, no sooner had I buried the pie with the CCC, it expanded and came to the top of the mixture, and burst open?!?! My puzzlement knew no bounds!

Then, I went to get the half-packet of brown bread thins, from where I just knew I’d left it… But no, it wasn’t there! I was sure I’d saved it in the bread bin, thinking at the time, how well it had worked out, having some for this feast, and with Sainsbury’s order due in the morning? (Although, of course, they may not send any, or might send a can of Turpentine as one of their infamous substitutes). The search had to be curtailed before the meal got too cold.

Despite the horrible, frustrating, failure-ridden day it’s been, the meal went down a treat! Flavour rating, 8.2/10! I put the basin etc. in the bowl to soak overnight.

I grabbed the next in line ‘Heartbeat’ DVD from the box and got it playing.

I was happily viewing away, and a thought came to me. (ideas do that sometimes, not very often, mind) Did I drop the bread thins down between the chairs last night? Oh, course, I had to get my body manipulated in such a position that I could shine the wind-up torch down into the darkness to look for any signs of the bread… Why, now that I’d eaten the meal is a mystery?

BPB (Back-Pain-Brenda) twinged, and has been painful ever since… of course, there was no bread down there!

♫ Fings, ain’t wot they used to be!♫

Inchcock: Gloriouslly Inane – Saturday 5th December 2020

♥ TFZer Winner ♥

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Saturday 5th December 2020

Welsh: Dydd Sadwrn 5ed Rhagfyr 2020

02:20hrs: I stirred, dreary-eyed, and found in the folds of my tummy fat layers, a page from the notepad, and as I looked down, a pencil dropped from behind my earhole. The reading glasses were hanging on the very end of my nose and fell off to join some (I found as I began to move), biscuit crumbs as well. Nocturnal Nibbling Guilt!

The scrawl on the paper was hard to decipher. Bits I could make out were, ‘dreams put in the blog’ and ‘wee-weeing…’ But unfortunately memories of having the dreams I’d apparently had were lost into the ether. They must have been interesting, or I would not have made the regrettably unreadable comments on the pad. Shame!

I went through the routine of getting up, catching the balance easily enough this morning. Noticing that the ankle ulcer was clearing up so quickly (Not complaining). The papule underneath the left foot was still tender, even though it had grown back on the bottom of the foot.

I tended to the Health Checks first.

The Harpin Xian Di Thermometer gave a good reading of 36.7°c, a very fair, in the green range result. Then, I got the sphygmomanometerisationing machine out to use, wondering if it will take a few tries to get it to work today, and worked on the third effort: The SYS was still a little too high, but it’s been worse many a time.

As I took the medications, I thought I heard a noise coming from the hallway, I went to investigate. There was a letter on the floor at the door, but that must have been there from yesterday. No one would be posting letters at 03:25hrs of a morning, so that wasn’t the noise I heard. No signs of anything fallen was identified, so I returned, and got the medications taken.

Then I opened the letter. It was an eight paged A4 notification, from HMG (Her Majesties Government), Department of Health & Social Care. It consisted of the following: Guidance for the festive period – Shielding – Access to health & care – Important Information about Covid-19 – Access to Additional Support – Vitamin D supplements – Socialising -Care & Support – Tier 1, 2, and three rules to follow – Going to the shops and Pharmacy regulations. Whether or not I will live long enough to read and digest it all, is questionable.

But, Hatt Mancock’s… sorry, Matt Hancock’s end quote of “We will Continue To Support You in your efforts to keep yourself & others safe!” gave me a warm-glow of bile, that did.

I assume he may be talking about my not getting my prescriptions without a battle on the phone each month with the Chemist I must not visit, to get them delivered? Or being unable to get my toe-nails cut? Or the cancelled Oncologist – Cardiothoracic – Endocrinologist – Pulmonologist – Neurologist – Urologist and Audiologist cancellations?

Or maybe as is likely, he’s more working towards the next general election than actually bothered about us all. He feels a bit of creeping and ersatz care pretending now, belatedly shown will ensure the votes? Who knows? You can’t blame him! Hahaha! 

I remember the then New health secretary Matt Hancock receiving £32,000 in donations from the chairman of the think tank that wanted the NHS ‘abolished’! Matt Hancock received nine donations between £2,000 and £4,000 from the man who heads the board of the free-market group, the Institute of Economic Affairs.

I also remember him, defending his spending almost £50,000 on takeaways for his staff from just one London restaurant during the peak of the Covid crisis. The Department of Health and Social Care (DHSC) spent a total of £47,528 on takeaways from Bong Bong’s Manila Kanteen earlier this year, a Freedom of Information (FOI) request has revealed. Just nine orders costing £43,348 were placed at the fashionable “Filipino-inspired” eatery during April, then another £4,179-worth of orders placed in March! Just thought I’d mention it!

I got the updating of the Friday post done quickly. Sent it to WordPress. Did some Facebooking catch-up, then on the WordPress Reader section. Finally, got around to site comments.

Made the first mug of Glengettie tea of the day, and had a bag of Frazzles with it, well, no time for brekkers, I have to get on with making the templates up.

I took regular breaks over the.. wait for it… seven-hours I spent, getting the templates finished! The first being for some brekkers, of sorts. I had a pot noodle, and some nuts to nibble.

Back on the template slog.

Turned everything off computer-wise, to let it cool down, and got the ablutions done.

The ankle was looking much better now, but had still got the odd itching, with it? Feeling as if worms or maggots were underneath the skin?

The session went safely enough, dropsies of course, and just the one nick shaving.

The medicating went so easy as well!

I got the clothes all washed and sanitised afterwards and hung them on the dreaded, not used now if I can avoid it, doing so by not wearing any socks, Sock-Glide.

I must make an order for delivery soon, I’m low on disinfectants.

I got the unopened old but ere new when I bought them, trousers on. They were classed as brown, but only just. Hehe! 

They fitted perfectly. Well, what I mean is; The legs were far to narrow, my ever-growing, bulging, flabby-belly made it hard work to fasten the waistband clip, the pockets were too small, the cotton thread hung from the bottom of the legs, the belt buckle supplied with the trews broke. The bum fitted a little too snuggly. Other than that, they were fine. Oh, and the back pocket had a hole in it!

I hand-washed the old black trouser, all done, done, rung and hung above the sink to drip dry.

Back to the templating. I got the computer going again, and got a message telling me that the hard drive is running low in space. I’ve no idea where the message came from, Microsoft, Google or the computer. After a few moments of frowning and fretting – the message disappeared?

I took a breather, of sorts when it started to be a grind, rather than pleasure, in doing the CorelDrawing.

I made up the small waste bags, added them to the others in the box, and got them on the three-wheeler guide, and taken off to the waste-room and down the chute. As I got into the lift lobby, I used the Cannon (It’s far easier to use when on the move, cause it fits in the pocket, which the Nikon Bridge camera will not do, too big). The first one, the view as I entered the lobby straight ahead, the none along the length of the lift lobby, and one as I turned around and snapped the three flats lobby. Mine being the solitary single one on the right. It was eerily quiet out there! With no workers, no noise from Herbert, and even the blasted ‘Hum’ seemed quieter to me?

I got the bags down, in the process gaining a pretty deep blue bruise on the knuckles as I trapped the hand as the lid shot back closed.

Back to the apartment, and took these shots of the darkening day from the gallery.

Back to the templating again. I worked through uninterrupted for a few more hours. Got the templates finally finished and began thinking of what to have for my nosh. As I nosied around to see what was available, favouring doing the meatballs and potato shapes, to help clear the freezer, then I can free Jenny’s space up and fetch the meatballs she has kindly stored in her freezer for me.

Then it hit me, the usual late weariness, lack of concentration and feeling of being oh, so tired and worn out.

I decided against doing the meatballs, in case I fell asleep with them being in the oven for much longer. I got the potato shapes out of the freezer, and dropped the damned bag, catching it before it hit the floor, but a few of the shapes fell out. I noticed as I picked them up that the letters spelt ‘Thick’. (A link there somewhere?)  – Ah, clairvoyant potatoes? Hahaha!

The sky was changing as I farted-about making a right mess in preparing the cooking. Nicolas’ Neurotransmitter had been so kind all day. Still, it now was causing some dangerous situation with the oven and saucepan, like. I took a photo and another close-up of the picturesque peeping pink evening view.

Getting the pasties and potatoes out of the fridge, I caught my right arm on the oven. Puggleclumpdimwit! Ah, well!

I got the fodder l plated, and was amazed at the fact that I’d just made this meal! I was so, out-of-it, and drained? I must have engaged auto-pilot—a taste-rating of 7/10.

Too was tried to bother doing the washing up, and I required Sweet Morpheus.

But the Thought-Storms destroyed my hopes. Spurgledamnations!

Inchcock – Nottingham’s Ace Accifauxparist: Fri 4 Dec 20

♥ The TFZer Shepherdess, with some of her flock ♥

Friday 4th December 2020

Afrikaans: Vrydag 4 Desember 2020

00:35hrs: I woke in need of a wee-wee, I’ve missed this the last two mornings. At least I know I didn’t miss taking the Furosemide®.

I  hopped (hopped? Hahaha!) out of the recliner, went through the balance-gaining exercise, (something else I do regularly each morning, since the last time when I didn’t, and fell back down in the chair, causing Harold’s Haemorrhoids to bleed painfully, and set off BPB [Back-Pain-Brenda]) I recall the pain. Tsk! Over to the overnight bucket, and saw it had not been used. So instead of doing more cleaning, I hobbled to the wet room for the wee-wee—a disappointing affair, of the UTD (Unwilling-Trickling-Dribbling) variety.

I got the computer on, almost determined to get on with making up up some graphics on CorelDraw for the TFZer page top pictures. But first, I must update the Thursday blog and cracked-on with it, no Health Checks or mugs of tea, I persevered with the job!  Not a long job, there was not much to catch up with. I sent it off to WordPress, Emailed the link, did some Facebook catching up, and went on the WordPress reader.

Then made a brew, cursed the dank rainy weather, and had another UTD wee-wee. Then industriously, onto CorelDraw and got all of the TFZer graphics done that I needed! Smugness Adopted! Mind you, it took me over three hours of concentrated attention to detail. I can’t brag too much, I’ve not checked them out yet for mistakes.

I had to put a stop to this dedicated, determined attitude, to respond to a call to the Porcelain Throne. Fearing this visit being as bad as yesterdays, I went apprehensively to the wet room. Constipation Konrad beat the hell out of Trotsky Terence again, but by less, I’d say a 2-0 victory. Which meant a little less pain for yours truly, but it was still bad. No bleeding, though, that was a plus! Haemorrhoid Harold didn’t suffer so much, thankfully! I noticed that ankle ulcer was looking good, no pain whatsoever, fading now, and no itching. A risk of Semi-Contentment developing here!

Time was flashing by, and the Ablutions will need doing soon. I spent some time making up some Thought graphics, then back off to the wet room for a scrub-up.

: Well, and it did go well! Worryingly, unnaturally so!

As I stripped off, I could not help but take these pictures on the right here. The legs, ankle ulcer, and feet, all looked much improved.

The left-hand papule that appeared yesterday, had gone down to the titchiest little spot, the puss-head was not to be seen today?

The teeth cleaning was a painless and bloodless affair. (2-dropsies)

The shaving had only one wee-cut. (3-dropsies)

The showering had a few dodgy moments. The first of the dropsies, the shower gel bottle, landed right on the leg ulcer – and it didn’t even hurt! A full bottle as well! (This good luck can’t last, surely?)

Then Dizzy Dennis visited, but I’d left the shower chair handy, so had a sit-down, and within a minute or so, was back up showering away to my little heart’s content!

A total of only 2 dropsies in the shower! Yes! But, getting out of the shower, I’d left the chair to close and had forgotten about it. Klunk! I banged the right ankle on the chair leg! Ah-well!

The medicationing went brilliantly! No accifauxpas, bleeding or knock-overs! Yee-Haa!

As I put the trousers on, the bashed ulcer had become so tender and ultra itchy, and looked a tad inflamed? I think new growths were coming up around the ulcer and nearby?

It was the devil’s of a job not to scratch at it! Gringglebogs!

I got the handwashing, just a towel, done wrung and hung to dry above the sink.

The trouser legs were catching on the now tender leg ulcer, so pulled up the trews leg out of the way – but it was so cold now. Brrr!

The workmen’s tapping, knocking and drilling started, and carried on, and on, and on… Still, it can’t be helped. Dangnableisations! Hehe!

I took a photo through the balcony window, it was still raining, glum, and a disheartening sight. With it being so cold in the flat as well, anyone would think it was winter.

Oh, it is innit!

I got the much belated Health Checking done. Started with the body temperature with the contactless thingamabob.

That was looking well-healthy at 36.6°c. No complaints there then.

The sphygmomanometerisationing showed a higher than for a while SYS of 176. Maybe it’s because I took so much later than I usually do?

I took the morning medications, as well.

The ankle ulcer had stopped being tender, and I could now drop my trouser leg. Giggle! I took the last photo of it, and it had been seeping a bit, but it left a lot better, easier, calmer, now.

The drilling and knocking noises are getting irritating. But needs must. I’ve got a rare headache coming on. Hey-ho!

Back to the computer to update this blog, so I can get back to CorelDrawing. But it’s getting late now, but the graphics will have to be done, or I’ll be in a right pickle in the morning. I did some IT updating and then went for a brew. The view outside, showed some sleet or snow trying to come down with the rain, so I got the Nikon camera and went out on the balcony to take some shots – through the glass, too cold and wet to open any windows.

Then I bravely and foolishly (had I known what was about to happen, I would never have gone in the kitchen, but of course. who knows what fate holds for us, Hahaha!) I decided to take a picture from the unwanted, disliked, light and view-blocking kitchen window, to try and catch the sleet and snow in the photograph…

Gragglespitgurgle! Bungdankles! Splerminescence! Flagtoggles!
 

As I went to open the most hated and unluckiest, bedevilled, cursed, kitchen window in the world;

Peripheral Neuropathy Pete produced a right leg Schuhplattler Dance/Wobble about session, that had me on the deck before I knew the flailing dance was coming! I lay there, in a semi-crumpled heap of stomach-dominated mass, for a minute or so, awaiting the dancing limb to stop, feeling and sensing for any injuries.

Unglefrogwonglingisations!

I’d grabbed out for support, the walking stick was the first thing that abandoned me. And caught the washing hanging on the curtain rail, that joined the clothes in falling off to the floor, knocking the tea mug, picker-upperer and all the other clothes in another load on the floor!

I was shocked and annoyed a bit. But soon weighed up what could be done to get back on my feet. I decided to crawl on all fours, to the recliner in the other room. (Which pleased Arthur Itis’s knees I can tell yer!) that’s strong enough to take me heaving my weight back up, I’ve used it a few time in the past. I managed to get myself up, surprisingly easy as it happens?

Bother from BPB, Haemorrhoid Harold, clouted on the elbow and head, and the ankle must have hit something, it was now bleeding a smidge. I cleaned up the ulcer area and ointmentated it. Nae, bother! I had the struggle to get the leg up so I could tend to it, and almost went over again getting the leg down! You’ve got to laugh!

I was moving a bit stiffly with the back hurting, I just took my time. I got the ‘fallen clothes’ (Haha!) on the hooks in the hallway. Not much room left to get through now—Hell of a mess to clean up.

As I said; You’ve got to laugh!

Despite the Whoopsiedangles and Accifauxpas, I was more than ever determined to get some photo’s of the snow, but I noticed it was stopping, so I had a go with the Nikon.

I took a Codeine 60g, a Dioctyl® poo-softener, and a Paracetamol 30g, so the discomfort should soon be easing off. Although BPB (Back-Pain-Brenda) feels as she’ll be set-in for a while. I’ll still the other painkillers later with the evening medications.

I was genuinely angry when it first happened. But it soon faded. As Doctor said when Peripheral Neuropathy was diagnosed, ‘There is nothing we can do to repair dying nerve ends’, So, fair enuf!

I pretended to clean the kitchen a bit, and thought sod-it! I got on with updating this blog, while happenings were clear in my head.

The landline burst forth. It was the beautiful, desirable, so sweet, caring Hristina, my beloved Phlebotomy vampire nurse. Kindly advising me that she is calling for my blood on Monday, twixt 08:00 > 10:00hrs. Bless her. Well, that made me feel better straight away! ♥

It’s so late now with all the faffing about I’ve suffered. I really need to get at least one template made up… Hello, Anne Gyna’s kicking into Hurt-Inchcock mode now! Cringleblastitt!

I went back to CorelDraw to if I was up to making the template. Oh, dear! I got one made, and then started to prep the meal.

I made more mess in the kitchen making the nosh, feel guilty, but am not up to doing any more cleaning or physical labour… I have enough problems staying awake to eat the fodder.

The old Thought-Storms began when I got to settle, so sleep was a time coming.

Inchcock – Nottinghams Highest EQ – Lowest IQ – Thursday 3rd December 2020

TFZer Meal-Makers on TV?

Thursday 3rd December 2020

Welsh: Dydd Iau 3ydd Rhagfyr 2020

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00:25hrs: I stirred back into imitation life, and the ailments already having a bash at me, the moment I moved any connected limbs, were; SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley), Haemorrhoid Harold, and Duodenal Donald, with a few mild interruptions by wandering all over the front torso, Anne Gyna. But this is not unusual.

The astonishing thing was the frame of mind I was in. I felt almost contented and ready for anything that came along? Naturally, this is not going to last long, but still, a great, if a rare, situation, that I will do my best to enjoy!

No calls to the Porcelain Throne or Wee-wee bucket either! I rose, caught my balance, and meandered into the kitchen. No desire for a mug of tea (now I was getting a smidge confused and a semblance of weariness developed). Oh, dearie me! My bestirring semi-contented feeling was diminishing already.

I checked the hanging above the sink hand-washing and moved the jammie bottoms onto the upright clothes dryer. All this time, I was… I don’t know how to describe it, erm, like I was not me, or someone had hacked into my brain? No wee, no pooing, no mug of tea, Arthur Itis and Cartilage Cathy has never been kinder to me than they were this morning? Caught my balance without the exercising first! And not a single Dizzy Dennis visit yet! Conrad Confusion was being tested, here! As was what semblance of sanity I have!

With a determination I’ve not possessed for months, I grabbed a bottle of spring water, and made for the computer, to upload last nights photographs, and start the updating of the Wednesday IT diary.

I’m certainly not claiming that I was efficient, or methodical in my efforts, as I began to work on CorelDraw to get the photographs resized. But my regular hesitancy, indecision and dilly-dallying were far less than they would usually be. I wish I could work-out why? 

The task of getting the photographs prepped took me less than an hour. Never been known to be so fast in years!

Then I realised that the Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters were only rarely dying on me, and when they did, it was only for a few seconds at a time. I was baffled at this. But well happy with the situation! And pressed on as quickly as I could to take advantage!

I got the pictures done and into the WordPress gallery ready to use. Then started to update the Wednesday blog… and had to stop, damned shame this, just when I was getting something done, to go to the Porcelain Throne utilisationing.

I got to the wet room in plenty of time, not that it mattered. For Constipation Konrad repeated his Wednesday victory over Trotsky Terence, but by a bigger margin! At least 6-0! As I sat there, toying with the crossword book, and daring not try to force things along, and waiting for the innards to evacuate at their own pace – I soon realised that this was not going to happen. I don’t know why I put ‘soon’ there? It must have been a good fifteen minutes, and three new answers found for the crossword puzzle before I had no option, other than to grin and bear the pain (it was worst in weeks). And I urged the action to start. A few silent Argh! Eeks! and a couple of minutes later, the evacuation started, agonisingly slow, full pressure had to be applied on my behalf. In the midst of the protracted torture, I swore to take two of the Dioctyl® poo-softeners as soon as I could after this agonising session had finished. Which turned out was not to be, for a good few more minutes yet!

Harolds Haemorrhoids were going through hell, I could feel the blood, with it being warmer, hitting the body parts as it flowed. The torpedo even needed a final extra urging to finish the motion… at last! Well, that put the final nail in my feeling optimisticness!

I changed into a disheartened, forlorn mode. The cleaning up was not too bad, with the evacuated product being rock-hard. Even the cistern somehow managed to clear it away first flush!

But it had left me feeling so sore! I washed the rear-end and put the bloodied paper towels and sealed in the bin. The medicating of poor old Harold’s department, even using the Germoloid Ointment, was the most excruciating I’ve known for years!

I changed into one of the older Morrison bought white PPs (that fitted). Memories of pre-Coronavirus days flowed. The time before Morrisons and Sainsbury’s started sending the most farcical substitutes, you know, like AA batteries in place of a can opener, Medium Protection Pants instead of XL, and McCains foul-tasting black pepper fries in place of Sweet potato battered fritters!

But, these things happen, so I wasn’t bothered, and I took it casually in my stride. No cursing, planning getting my revenge or anything like that. Oh, no! Gesundheit!

A demoralised Inchcock, with a very sore bottom, returned to his computer. Back in his regular, normal, nervous, twitchy, haphazard, grumpy, fed-up, wee’d-off, desultory, and laissez-faire, defeatist, frame-of-mind. Feeling so sorry for himself, too! 

But, my being a well-educated, dedicated, sharp-witted, positive, capable, and ultra-determined character, I pressed on and got the updating finished, not giving a care to the ailments, back-luck or having just dropped my mobile, and it isn’t working now. Sob, Grubbleackers and Grrr! (No confidence Scenario emerging)

I decided to make a brew of Glengettie. (it will not help, but it’ll be tasty!) And poddled off to the kitchen to get the kettle on. The sky was getting a smidge lighter, so I got the Nikon and took a couple of photos.

A lot of the Christmas lights had been turned off for the night. I can’t blame anyone, they may encourage the attentions of burglars, distraction con-men, and local yobbery, who have been more active in Sherwood lately. I got these figures from the local Email Mag: Monthly Crime figures for little Sherwood, June 193 – July 196 – August 199 – September 211- Not good!

The knocking and banging from the workers have started off, started work early today, bless ’em. I made a start on this post…

When I opened the Notebook app to get the information stored, it came up empty? What? Had I done something wrong, or what? Had it been hacked? It had some important numbers and passwords in it? Oh, dearie me, I’m feeling even worse now! Really fed-up! Granglespithowlations!

I got the ablutions done! Which went better than I expected. It’s all up and downs today? The usual dropsies and a few shaving nicks. The showering went as good as it has in months, no knocks, dizzies, toe-stubbing or loss of balance. Smooth! The medicationing had its moments, but nowt excessive. The legs and feet looked good to me. The wee-wees had dried up as well. The skin is as normal, looking a smidge deathly pale again.

I did find a photo on the SD card later, that was a mystery to me. I’m not sure I meant to take it, or why if I did. Hehehe! But you never know, with the state of my memory and incertitude? Is that the right word? I’ll check. Yes, that’s the one.

I had to laugh when I was using the long shoe-horn to get the slippers on. Somehow or other, I’d got the horn stuck in the outer part of the faux-leather of the footwear, and it stuck there, needing extracting. But it was so funny, I got the smaller Canon camera and managed to take a shot of it with the left hand, without any Accifauxpas or Whoopsiedangleplops. Smug-Mode-Adopted!

I hand-washed the blue zip-up jerkin. All done, wrung and hung above the sink to eventually drip dry, I hope.

Then I moved the jammie bottoms on the fairer ti aid in drying them enough to wear. Judging by how damp they still were, I anticipate them being dried somewhere around next April. Haha!

I then spotted two burglar alarm activating in the rain-sodden Cavendish Vale. I tried a few times to get a photo that showed the alarm lights, but I failed in my efforts.

Then I made up two more small waste bags and put them in the box on the three-wheeled walker. And I added a biggish couple of bag with recyclables materials in them, to it on the handlebars.

I had a panicky moment and a kerfuffle finding the key fob to take with me so I can get back into the flats. Then, as I thought all was ready to take the trolley down to the bins, (It’s collection day today), I couldn’t find my long-distance spectacles! After a hunt around, I found them in plain view on the TV stand. The worrying thing, is how I missed them so many times in my searching?

I departed the flat, hoping to meet someone en route to the waste bins for a natter. I met a worker in the 2th-floor lift lobby, said hello, but he couldn’t understand English, So I gave him a smile, which was a bit silly-billy of me, cause I had the mask on! Hahaha!

No one was using the elevators at that moment, so I was soon down on the ground floor. Got the little Cannon camera out and took this photo of the ground floor lobby.

Then hobbled to the and through the main lobby and out in the wet rain, to the bins awaiting collection. I took the photo of the electronic notice board on the way to the lobby.

Where I met the caretakers and got involved in the nattering session with them… well, that’s not strictly true. I did the talking, that bored them into a rolling-eyes mode within 30 seconds. I’m good at doing that, and with effort either!

I returned to Woodthorpe Court flats, took another picture of the being updated hallways and lobby, and got up in the lift to the 12th-floor.

Getting out of the cage, I had my first wobbly of the day, (I’d done well up to now though!) and caught my shoulder through my weak spatial awareness, on the side of the lift. Which set of BPB (Back-Pain-Brenda) and SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley), Humph!

Naturally, this didn’t bother me in the least. (Much!)

The worker’s equipment was in the lift lobby. I got back into the flat, and I got the kettle on, post-haste! And made a brew of glorious Glengettie.

I worked on this post for about four hours, and the back and right shoulder from hitting the lift side, was pretty bothersome, and the computing had to be stopped. At that moment, the landline rang forth. It was a recorded message; “Your internet connection will be disconnected in 24hrs – We have detected a hacking on your computer. Contact BT on… That’s as far I let the machine ramble on! I rang off, it must be a con of some sort being played on me.

I got opened a can of Chilli-Con-Carne into a saucepan, added some made-up vegetable gravy, and a drop of Hickory, and sliced some tomatoes to go in the mix, with just a sprinkle of  Balsamic vinegar. Got the oven warming to do some chips in.

I took the evening medications, making sure I took another Dioctyl® poop-softener, I don’t want to go through the same agony as this morning again.

The eyes were drooping, the back hurting. As often happens, I was feeling smidge rough around the edges. I quickly got the latest local Coronavirus figures.

Then got the nosh sorted and served up.

As tired as I was, the nosh, eaten slowly, well masticated and savoured, got a taste-rating of 8.8/10. I must write down the extras I put in this Chill-Con-Carne.

I got the pots washed, and settled down early for once, in search of sleep. Which arrived pretty quickly, and lasted unbroken for three hours, before I woke up with a start, in desperate need of a wee-wee!

Inchcock, Wed 2 Dec 20: Nottinghams answer to ambivalence

That’s my kind of salad Pattie! ♥

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Wednesday 2nd December 2020

Zulu: NgoLwesithathu 2nd December 2020

02:25hrs: I woke, in a generally more optimistic mood. I’ve not got the foggiest idea why? The dreaded ‘Hum’ was with us again, but not as loud as yesterday.

As I began assembling enough thoughts and ideas to start planning what needed doing, what day it was etc. the need for a wee-wee, worryingly urgently, arrived!

No EOGPB (Essential-Overnight-Grey-Plastic-Bucket) was in its usual position? So, obviously, I couldn’t have had one during the night. Maybe this is why the urgency was so acute?

The process of getting up, catching the balance (dodgily), hobbling in agony with the papule underfoot, getting to the WC, and taking the abysmally dribbling, weak, tinkle, took me a while.

And now here I was with the new Sainsbury’s substituted medium for large-sized Protection Pants, torn while dropping them, and lay down around my ankles! A flaming good start to the day! I saw that a bit of blood had leaked from Little Inchies fungal lesion – this is because Sainsbury’s substituted with smaller pants and they must have chaffed at the wound. I put on one of the old normal white PPs. So much for me waking up in a better frame of mind, that silly idea, soon dissipated!

As leaving after the kerfuffle and sorting out, I had to go back in, to use the Porcelain Throne! Do you know, ‘someone idiot warned me over 70 years ago, that a time will come as get old when I will be bored!’ He lied! Giggle!

However, the mode of evacuation was almost the opposite of Tuesdays. Trotsky Terence had the upper-hand today, a 2-1 win I’d say! It was grand not having to struggle, and besides that and also, there were only tiny bits of bleeding! Oh, yes! Mind you, it still hurt, just a lot less.

I got on with the Health Checks, remembering today (I forgot yesterday, but had the photos on the blog to find the numbers) to fill in the record logs. The Boot’s sphygmomanometer showed an increase in the SYS up to 161.

The Harpin Xian Di Thermometer was again in the green, at 36.4°c was about right methinks.

I took the medications. Having forgotten to take last nights yet again! I must remember to take the morning ones later on. Then, I went to make a brew and had a mind-bending experience… “I thought, I’ll have a mug of the decaffeinated crap, then I can tell the doctor the truth when I say, “Oh, yes, I’m drinking the Yorkshire brand of no tealess teabags, regularly” Ahem!

After getting the kettle on, I took three shots from the kitchens unliked, light & view-blocking new windows of the morning view. I tagged them together later, left, ahead and to the right order. I think it gives a better idea of the marvellous view I can get from my prison cell… erm… flat!

I used two tea bags in the little mug. Hopefully, this might produce a brew that resembles something like tea. I left the bags in for a full five minutes to mash properly, holding out high hopes of success. Ersatz Crap! But so as not to fib to the lady Gastroenterologist, I have two sips, before getting a proper mug of Glengettie made.

As I took the photo of the mug of tea, a message came up on the camera viewing screen; ‘This battery is empty’ – Oh! I got in on charging and using the old little Canon until the Nikon battery had been rejuvenated.

I got on with updating the Tuesday blog. It took a good few hours, but I got there in the end. Emailed the link, Pinterested some photos, and did the Facebooking catchup. Good timing as well, cause SSS (Shaking-Shoulder-Shirley) then started to kick-off, had she this earlier, I’d still be doing the updating about next Wednesday, judging by the way she is going at me at the moment. Within ten minutes, the joint was aching thanks to her concentrated attack!

Reading a blog from Doug, about his beloved cat Andy, brought back memories of Sister Janes, Fooey. A similar cat to Andy, but white. The poor chap had arthritis, went almost blind… and never lost his sociability with people. The noises he used to make… I loved that cat. He passed away, I think JAne said he was fourteen at the time. This is one of the last photos I took after he’s had a home-perm from Jane. I am not ashamed to say, looking at him, and writing this, I’m swelling up inside. Doug has recently lost Andy’s brother, Dougie. I hope this doesn’t upset him. I check his and Andy’s site on WordPress.

  I went on the WordPress Reader section, some interesting stuff on there today. Answered the flood of WordPress comments, both of them! You can see how popular my blog is, Hehehe!

Time to get the Ablutionalisationing tended to. And believe me, the teeth cleaning, shaving and showering, all went very well, remarkably so! Oh, yes, indeed!

The medicationalisationing was not so good! The spot or papule under the left foot, looks different today, just as painful, but like an ordinary spot? It had grown back as well, was no longer half-hanging off of the foot? Most peculiar! I spotted a little tiny new growth coming, below the little toe, that should be interesting, seeing what it turns out as, Haha!

The hardest part of this checking, was my getting my leg up on the right one, to take this photo. I dropped the camera, banged various part of my anatomy… several times, as SSS sent me all over the place hitting various parts of the wet-room furniture (No soft parts, of course) Getting the leg back down again, was slightly more serious, the shock from the pain of standing on the papule again, combined with SSS having another bash at me, Arthur Itis not liking the knee being bent, a toe-stubbing against the sock-glide, and bashing my knee against the shower chair… Well, it was interesting!

Foolishly, I sat down again to take a close up photograph of the veins in the left leg, I could only get it up to the right legs kneecap this time. I think I have a mini-vein eruption? Hahaha! Very pretty, all the same.

I put the fist of the Amazon pants on to try today. They look bigger than the Sainsbury ones – Der! they would, they are a size larger! See how quick I’d worked that out?

They are not the pattern or colour of those shown in on the  Amazon site, though, nothing like! Humph! As you can see, they are the same shade as the Sainsbury ones. No pattern to them. I felt a little cheated. Still, they are the right size, so they’ll have to do. The comfort and lack of warmth in then os on a par with the Sainbury wrong-size substituted ones, but I feel more confident that when the next ‘leak’ comes along, these will be more likely to cope with it.

The Phorpaining of Arthur Itis’s knees, SSS’s painfully aching shoulder, the Germoloiding of poor old Harold’s Haemorrhoids, and even the Cortiscoid creaming of Little Inchies fungal lesion, all went well. Smug-Mode-Adopted! 

All dressed, I left the wet room and got straight on with the days handwashing. I did the bath towel I’d just used and jammy bottoms.

All washed, done, rung and hung above the sink. I then got the water spillages mopped up, laundry bottle cat found and retrieved. Then made up some small waste bags and put then in the box on top of the three-wheeled trolley guide, using the Nokia again now to take the photos, that charged up quick? Ah, done it again, I meant Nikon camera! 

As I got back on the computer to make a start on this post, some loud taps tapping and banging started from Herbert’s flat above, right above where I sat. It was so loud, and persistent for an hour or so that I imagine it would be some repairs being done for him. Or, he might have been making a real life-size train for his charity? Hahaha!

I made a brew, of Thompsons Punjana, and went on CorelDraw to make some graphics for the page tops of the diary. I was having a bit of bother with getting CorelDraw to work, and frustration and fatigue set in, so I turned off the whole computer, and got something to eat, anything easy to do, I was so tired.

I got thinking and opted to make something I could do all in one – so got the oven on, with fish strips, and potato-letters in the kiln. Sliced some tomatoes, put desserts on the trayed plate, and the banging, knocking and clumping started again. It was very closed and loud, I reckon it’s some upgrading work being done judging by the noises, it was being made by several people, it’s been on and off all day. This must be them rushing to get the work done before going home time. (Of course, I might be wrong about all of this, it has been known).

I got the rushed-meal served up, on the tray, and to the recliner I did stray, ‘Please stay wake’ I did pray, long enough to eat it.

I had a bit of help the instant I got done in the recliner with the food, the bang-bang banging, started again. It had a sense of it being rushed. Perhaps the lads were trying to get it done and over with quickly? It didn’t last long this last ‘Hurrah’, I assume the lads will be going home now. Will they, like Arnie, be back? Hahaha!

I’d put the TV on using the headphones to help mask the last of the banging session. Aha, Law & Order was on! I ate the meal (during which the banging stopped for the day), and I went to wash the pots. Then back down in the recliner.

My mind wanted to just sleep, and somehow avoided the Thought Storms, which was – Brilliant!

However, the body wasn’t so keen on kipping! A wee-wee was needed, and as I got up, I felt the splitting/cracking of the seal of the cortisone cream on Little Inchies fungal lesion; and the flow of blood starting!

Off to the wet room for investigating and medicationing. The bleeding was far less than I thought it was, and the Amazon-delivered PPs had coped well it, containment-wise. I washed and re-creamed Little Inchy, I got fresh PP’s on, and bagged up the old ones and took them to the waste bag box in the hallway.

By the time I’d got down again, the idea of getting to sleep was destroyed by the return of the Thought Storming. I’m not sure what time I drifted off, but it was hours later, after battling the guilts, shames and frustrations.

Yet, when I woke up, around 00:45hrs, it was with a slight spring in the air-feeling?

Inchcock, Nottingham’s Answer To Haemorrhoids – Tuesday 1st December 2020

One of the Younger TFZers! Haha! ♥

Tuesday 1st December 2020

Maori: Turei 1st o Tihema 2020

03:30hrs: Sometimes, one isn’t really, too keen on getting up, and would rather just lay there, and uhtceare instead, trying to avoid any dangerous or serious signs of any expergefactor that may be lurking. This was one of those mornings.

The oh, so late getting to sleep after yesterdays farcicalness, favourable moments, and frustrations, meant only four hours kip, and annoyingly when I did wake, it was one of those jump-awake ones. Cragnangles!

I rose from the recliner onto my feet, in need of a  wee-wee, and hobble to the EOGPB (Emergency-Overnight-Grey-Plastic-Bucket), and on the first shuffle of the feet, got an electric-shock like stabbings of pains from the papule underneath the left foot. I’ll have a check on it later, the plaster may have come off in the night and is pulling at the pimple?)

The Sainsbury’s substituted wrong-sized Protection Pants had not handled the PMD (Pre-Micturition-Dribble), and AMD (After-Micturition-Dribble) well, at all. Also, they held less comfort and were not very warm to wear. Thank you, dear silly-Substitutes Lord Sainsbury, Baron, and Knight of the Garter. I hope your personal wealth increases from the current £1.4 billion. Carry on with stupid substitutes and it will. Better hurry though, after all, you are 93!

I went into a sort of auto mode then. Washed my hands, into the kitchenette and put the kettle on. I took some pictures from the unwanted, unliked, light & view-blocking new windows, to first try and get a decent shot of the moon. On taking the first effort, SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley) paid me a visit and left me with this almost looking like a lightning snap. So, had another bash, and got a fairish result.

I got a reasonable zoomed in a bit shot, of Sherwood, with Basford, Perry Road HMP, and the lights from Bulwell and the motorway on the horizon. (I know you can’t see them, but it makes me sound cleverer, Hahaha!) Then a blind shot of the car park below on Chestnut Walk, only one red car this morning. (I hope Billumski The Chairman and Director of the RCMS from Utah is making a note of this) As I got the brew of Glengettie made, SSS returned, and sheer good luck with her timing, meant no spillages or Accifauxpas. Good luck? For me, and so early in the day…? Nae, this can’t be right! You can take it from me, via my EQ, that summat Whoopsiedangleplopish is in the air and on the way!

I got the sphygmomanometer out, and the machine needed three goes to get it to work. Mind you, the reading was down a smidge more, for the third day on the trot! But I’m not getting excited about it, not with my luck. Egads, no!

The Chinese made contactless thermometer, made with plastic from India, and imported from Soth Korea, showed a temperature of 36.2° c. Which I think is not too bad at all. 

I got the medications out, and realised I had yet again, not taken last night’s! So, I did. Must remember to take the morning ones later on. Made a brew of Glengettie tea, and got the computer on. I had to divert to the Porcelain Throne, then.

And, what a change in style that was today! I got seated, as directed by the gastroenterologist had advised me… well, commanded me really! The wait for any action to start was a long one. That’s when I got the crossword book from the cabinet. After an aeon or two of puzzling, I adopted the recommended straightening of the lower back while I was leaning and pushing the shoulders… Nothing happened… Apart from BPB (Back-Pain-Brenda)  starting to give me a pasting! Granglesbognessbuggerit! I think she was still annoyed at my tumble last night.

Once a slight motion, a forced pone though, was felt, slowly, grindingly and needing painful encouragement, things eventually moved… reluctantly, painfully, and at a snail’s pace! I was close the giving out a, Argh!, but held it back.

No doubt about it, Trotsky Terence was whipped 5-0 by Constipation Konrad this time.

As I rose from the seat to have a decker at what had caused all this agony, I was taken aback by the amount of blood that had exited. I got myself cleaned up, washed the tender areas, and applied some very welcome Germoloid ointment to Harold’s Haemorrhoids! You should have seen my walk back to the kitchen, well, maybe not!

In keeping with my fantasmagorical luck, I now had several additional ailments to contend with all at the same time, which made hobbling somewhat difficult. Still, it must have been most hilarious for anyone to watch. The head was aching a bit from the fall, the lower back was being taken care of by a particularly, violent BPB, and Harold’s Haemorrhoids have rarely been more painful! Then Dizzy Dennis joined in as I was in the hallway – not again, I prayed! I don’t think I would be able to get back up again if I did topple over now.

Made a brew of Thompsons Punjana tea, each one I’ve made has gone cold for one reason or another. Humph! I was showing no signs of wanting any breakfast today. But I did take an extra Dioctyl® poo-softener capsule (And another one later!)

I concentrated of updating the Monday blog. It took a while, and some odd noises were coming from somewhere nearby, sounded like someone was dropping wooden blocks repeatedly? I might be something going down the chute a little early? Anyway, I got the post finished and sent off to WordPress. Emailed the link, and went on Pinterest, and it was soon time to get the ablutions done.

I took this shot of the moon on my way to the wet room.

At last, a decentish ablution session. It had it’s moments though. The dropsies were about average, I reckon.

The shaving was smidge hair-raising, and that’s not easy when you have no hair! Hahaha!

All the cuts and nicks were from the back of the neck. It’s not fair hair growing there and nowhere else! Snigger!

No shower today, the Iceland order is due, oh, and the Amazon PPs might be arriving today. After an easy medicationing session and getting dressed, I hand-washed the long-sleeve tee-shirt.

The day was breaking and the sky clearing, an amazing colour too. I managed to get a reasonably decent shot of the late moon before it disappeared.

Suddenly it very busy! The intercom rang, it was the Amazon man with the PP’s for me. He came up and put them in the hallway for me. Followed by the Iceland driver, he also put the bags into the hallway for me, bless ’em both.

I took the carriers through to the kitchen, intending to sort out the frozen and fresh stuff first. But I was so interested in seeing the new PP’s I couldn’t resist sorting them first instead.

I got the box onto the server in the kitchen and struggled a bit to get the plastic cover off of the box. It was only thin material, but by gum it strong!

I got it off in the end! I wish they would sell them of this strength to use as bin bags, I made up[ waste bags as I went along.

The three packs of eight looked similar to the other ones from Sainsbury’s, but were cheaper and the correct size.

I’ll try them on afterwards I thought, then changed my mind, I’d got the Sainsbury ones on at the time. They are not very warm and a little small, if I had a bad leakage, I don’t think they would cope with the amount of blood. I put them in the wet room with the others and sorted the groceries out.

Oh, dearie me, what have I done here? I’d ordered in error, two bags of the frozen meatballs, also two of the fish strips in the batter. I imagine because they were on offer if you bought two, I’d unthinkingly ordered two of each. No way will I have space in the freezer for them all! I struggled to make room for one of each in the freezer.

I’ll see if Jenny can use the others. The other bits went in the fridge, okay, mind. I cleared up[ a bit (when I say a bit, I mean it! Haha!), and got the bags with the fodder in, and a box of waste-bags on the trolley.

I set out, with intentions of going to Jennys (I phoned her on my way, with my new Samsung-Galaxy S20 Ultra-mobile, 512MB, £1,399 for 128GB storage, with its gargantuan 6.9in display, and hole-punch camera, and ‘Space Zoom 100x’), and then to go and see Deana and Julie, then back to the flats and put the rubbish bags in the waste chute. But life is never that clear-cut for a twit like me!

Then a series of Inchcock-Hiccups followed!

I dropped the bag at Jenny’s, bless her, she said she’d keep the fish and meatballs in her fridge of a few days until I get the room in my freezer, to take them back. Appreciative of Jen’s help, and feeling in higher spirits now, I set of in the lift down to the ground floor. I met the caretaker, and he took the bags off of me. After a little natter, I limped along Chestnut Way to Winwood Court, and Deana’s Interrogation Cells. (Haha!)

As I arrived at the Winwood doors, I realised I had left the wrong bag with Jenny! What a pillock! So I had to go back to Jenny’s to swap the carriers. She was very understanding about it and met me at the door, and we exchanged the containers. I was feeling a little silly, but worse was to come later!

I made my way back down and out to Winwood Court again. As I approached the lobby, I realised I did not have a keyfob with me. Glory-Be and Granglesbognessbuggerit!!! Then a stroke of luck! A workman was entering the building, and I tagged on behind him and got in! Had a chinwag with Deana and Julie, told them of my cock-ups, that made them laugh.

Back to Woodthorpe Court. Where Robert let me in through his side door! And I made my way back up to the flat. I was feeling rather foolish at my Accifauxpas and was beginning to get annoyed with myself.

I made a brew of Glengettie, surely this time, I can get to drink one? But, no! Not yet! Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters let me down, just I picked up the brewed mug of tea – on the Silver lining side, the mug fell in the plastic waste bin and not the floor, so didn’t break! Unfortunately, I scolded my wrist and spilt tea on my trousers, which didn’t do the legs any favours! Then I had to clean everything up! I was tired out and on the verge of getting depressed now!

Gone my head-down time. But, Jenny had told how to cook the meatballs, I had planned to have chips with them, but cooking the balls in the oven, I decided on having potatoes, peas and gravy. I got the oven on. And checked on comments on WordPress

I’ll get the meal served up then. Fingers crossed. Jenny was right when she told that doing the meatballs in the oven, they would come out crispy. They did, and I liked them. Added them to the peas and potatoes in the big saucepan, made some thick gravy and added it to the mix, and warmed through. Got the pots made a mess off washed, stirring the mix in between. Got it dished up and enjoyed the Flavour-Rated 7/10 meal with some bread thins to soak up the gravy—a lemon yoghourt for afters. I was getting more and more tired, so I got up to get the pots washed properly, in case I fell asleep and dropped the tray etc.

Settled in the recliner, drained mentally, wanting to free the eyelids to do what comes naturally. The absence of any Thought-Storms was appreciated. But the vacuum left in my hypnagogic state was filled with a blankness that was not blank… hard to explain. Still, weird worries drifted in, and, more disturbingly, were treated with contempt and annoyance at their even being there?

I must have fallen asleep, cause I woke up at 02:20hrs.

Inchcock, Nottingham’s Catnapping, Somnolence expert: Sunday 29th November 2020

I’m sending wishes through the ether, that this will happen! ♥

Sunday 29th November 2020

Sunday 29th November 2020

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01:30hrs: I stirred, and was amazed to find I had slept for over five uninterrupted hours – and this after the night before’s mammoth sleep-in? I seem to have changed suddenly from an insomniac to a narcoleptic? Why I ask? I’m still waiting for an answer. Hehehe!

The mind seemed to be more responsive as well, the thoughts seemed more apparent when I talked to myself. A degree of uncustomary determination lingered as well; The Sainsbury order is due early today, Josie’s meal needs preparing and delivering, and I recalled that I’d put the new tube of Germoloid in the wet room.

I was a smidge disappointed in myself when I saw the untaken evening pot of medications still on the Ottoman, though. I mused for a few seconds, on why I am suddenly missing so many night tablets so often? But got no reply from the brain, which decided that a mug of Glengettie tea was more important.

So, I removed my overly-stomached body from the £300, second-hand, c1968, cringingly, sickeningly beige-coloured, dirty, unstable, broken-down, uncomfortable, rusty, rickety, rachitic, recliner, and up onto the feet to catch my balance. And this, usually a struggle at times, even causing Accifauxpas, was done with fantastic ease! Grabbed Metal-Micky, and was so glad I did, cause, en route to the kitchen, I had a bit of a wobbly, had I not got the stick, I could easily have gone over. I put the kettle on.

Musing over what a mixed start to the day it’d been so far, and I’d only been up for a few minutes? It was foggy outside, and it looked so cold with it, I decided against taking any open window photographs.  Made the brew, and back to the ottoman get the Health Checks done, all in auto-mode.

The sphygmomanometer needed a couple of tries to get it to work. The first effort indicated I’d snuffed it. Hahaha! But at least try two showed the SYS was down a tad, to 160. The thermometer showed a lower temperature too, at 36.1°c.

My aboulomania flourished, as I thought about what to do about the missed medications. I took the evening ones as I did yesterday, and must remember to take the morning ones later on. 

Then, as I turned, I hit my head on the corner of the door. Not badly, I’ve had many worse ones, but it seemed to spark a change in my everyday routine?

Instead of getting on with the computerisationing as I always do after the balance, and health checks and medication taking: Amazingly, I got the dark blue zip-up jerkin hand-washed? All done, wrung and hung on the coathanger to dry, but why?

Got the computer on, and instead of cracking on with the IT diary updating, I went on Facebook updating?

Finally, I went onto the updating of the Diary. A long job, but as Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters, SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley) and Saccades-Sandra were all in a good mood with me, I got it completed reasonably quickly. (This was worrying – something going right!)

Made a brew of Thompsons Punjana, and the summoning to the Porcelain Throne arrived, off to the wet room. The daily battle between Trotsky Terence and Constipation Konrad was a massive defeat for Konrad, 4-0. Talk about yucky, a monstrous, messy, mass, manoeuvred into the bowl. A lot of effort needed to clean things furniture-wise and bodily followed—a good wash around, and back to the Computer.

Posted the diary off to WordPress. Emailed the link, and Pinterested a few snaps from the post. Then made a start on this template.

Around 06:00hrs, I heard a shuddering clunk, it sounded like it was from close-by. I had a poddle around in my bestest Sherlock Holmesian style, but could not find what it was that caused it? I hope no one has had a fall above me.

I started this writing for a while but had to stop. The ablutions needed doing, so I would be all prepared in time, in the case of the Sainsbury order arriving on the button at eight o’clock.

Back in a bit… I hope!

I’m back! I got sidetracked again going to get the ablutions done. I went hand-washing mad again. (No, I don’t know why either, it must be the bang on the head? Hehehe!)

I have to say, although it was a stand-up wash and shave, it went tremendously well. No teeth problems, only one cut shaving, only two items knocked off of the cabinet and no more than ten dropsies in total. More good fortune! (Even more worrying, especially with the Sainsbury order coming, overcharging and bad subs will almost certainly come with the food? – My EQ has just warned me!)

As I was getting staggering around getting dressed, and putting on a slipper, a sharp pain was felt underfoot! The sort you get when you stand on something sharp, or a shard of glass. It was hard-work, painful, plaguy and galling, taking a photo of the wound. The Robert Morley like stomach tended to get in the way, Haha! I think it was a new papule coming up. Gawd it didn’t half sting when I put the foot down.

Sorry about the photo coming out in mono. Yet another mysterious wonder of Woodthorpe Court: The Ghosts, Hobgoblins, Boll-Weevils, Aliens, Gremlins, Karakia-cursing entities, Hallucinations. Materialisations, Poltergeist, Lemures, Spectres, Spirits, Spooks, Eidolons, Wairuas, Kehuas, Manifestations that permeate, pass through the pores and interstices of space, through the time-continuum. Usually, without rupture or displacement within the building. To cause havoc, fear and frustration, as they dislodge time itself, in their aspirations and skulduggery, to complete their Satanic mission, to hinder, scare, blight, embarrass, manacle, and throw a spanner in Inchcocks works, plans, hopes, and confidence! Which they succeeded in, but they usually do!

I took some photographs from the unliked kitchenette window. The fog (when writing this six hours or so later) only got thicker as the day went on. Oh, dear!

Then I got the hand-washing finished off, the green quilt I’d left to soak in the sink bowl. I rang it out as best I could, and got it on the stand-up clothes airer in the hallway, being careful not to hang over the electricals at the bottom. Not everyone can say that, Hehehe!

Back into the Steptoe & Son-like front room, and got the computer back on.

Incidentally, the wee-wees were few and far between today. I just thought I’d mention it like.

Moments later, the intercom rang out and lit up. T’was the Sainsbury order arriving. The driver’s first words were; “Sainsbury order, are you coming down to pick the stuff up?” I gave an “Oh… well, I’ll have to, I suppose!” I farted about getting a mask on, and the intercom went again. The driver asked if we had a lift. I said yes, and he said he’d bring the stuff up then. Thank heavens for that!

He arrived, just as I had a dizzy at the front door, he showed concern and unloaded the good into the box and two bags (As orders go, this was a biggun!) Then he carried them through to the kitchen for me. I thanked him, then got the paperwork out, to see what was what, substitution wise.

Well, there were a few concerns. The PP’s (Protection-Pants), had been substituted with smaller-size ones!

Plus, they were different from each other? I’d ordered two large size packets, but these were both medium-sized ones.

Now, I know that Sainsbury’s say you can return any substituted items not suitable. But would they appreciate my asking the driver to wait, while I go in the wet room, to try on a pair of pants – find they are too small, then put them back in the pack, sellotape it up, and hand them back to the driver for returning? I think not!

Then there was the lamentable, regrettable, disappointing, ill-advised, and stupid replacement for the delicious Potato cakes, Pikelets! Humph!

JS Pikelets, the only similarity being that they both have six items in the packet! I’d have thought the clue, ‘Potato’ might have prevented such an idiotic, inane, imbecilic, exasperating substitution, but no! (I think J Sainsbury and Morrisons are competing to get the annual, SSOTY (Stupidest-Substitution-of-the Year award). From my experience, it is a draw at the moment. They could have subbed with Irish Potato Farls, surely?

Thank heavens I ticked the ‘No Substitution’ option for the toothpaste, else I may have had a jar of pickled walnuts delivered, as well!

The Milk Roll loaf had one days life on it! Oh, and plain digestive biscuits came covered in chocolate. But I’m not complaining about that, there is a chance or even likelihood, that I ordered the wrong one, so fair do’s on that score.

Not that these idiotish, inane, illogical, crass, unreasoned, banal, piss-taking substitutions bother me too much, of course! Knackwrangles!

I set about sorting the food etc. and trying to find some room, I’d rather overdone it again. Not on the fresh stuff, mind. I’ve been caught out with short dates and bonkers substitutes that often this year, from JS and Morrisons.

The only thing that pleased me was that they had sent the cheapo (60p) Chilli-Con-Carne, (Morrisons had substituted their (59p) one, with £2.58 substitutes!) 

So, now I have a good stock of CCC in the kitchen, not the cupboard, that is already full. Hehehe!

Also, the can of Fray Bento’s meatballs in Chilli sauce, that can now be added to a tin that Hubbard’s (Sainsbury own label) Chilli Con Carne, making an easy peasy meal one day soon?

I’ll not starve for a bit, anyway. I may have a heart attack or another stroke, but still, it’s summat to look forward to – the Chilli, not the snuffing it! Glad I cleared that up!

I got the waste bags sorted onto the box on the trolley to go to the waste chute.

Then sorted the unwanted good from J Sainsbury’s crap substitutes and my possible (I think it was!) error on the chocolate biscuits I shouldn’t eat. Ahem! To take them down to Jenny’s, with some treats for Nora and Frank of the alcoholic variety. Hehe!

Of I poddled down in the lift to deliver the unwanted crap substitutes from J Sainsbury’s to Jenny’s. Who can use them as part of her charity, or whatever? They always get used to help others, with Jenny in control. Bless her!

I made a call before leaving, to Jen, to moan, lament, and bicker about the substitutions again. Hehe! And let her know I was on my way. Down and delivered them, back up and put the stuff in the waste chute on my floor.

I had a look on the Wilko site, as Jenny suggested to see if they had any PPs on sale. It was a £50 limit to get free delivery, or a minimum £10 charge. They only had a couple of men’s pants, and they were not cheap.

So I went on Amazon for a look-see what they had. I found these Tena ones, at £1 a disposable pair. I ordered some on Special Price, it said they were a new make. I just hope I’ve not ordered the wrong things again. They are at least a large size.

I then tended to prepare Josie’s meal sorted out. It was hard work doing it up today, not sure why. The cheesy potatoes were a little loose, I’d but in too much butter. But I think she likes them like that.

I delivered the meal eight minutes earlier than usual to Josie’s door, and there was no answer. Just as well, cause I’d forgot to take a photo of her Sunday feast. I nipped back in and took this shot and returned to her door and rang the bells again. I was greeted with; “You are early!” Hehehe! She laughed and inspected the fodder. It seemed to pass muster, she said she liked the fish Surami sticks, and the can of Rum and whatever went down well.

Please, I came back to the flat, did the washing up from the first nosh, and started updating the blog. Gawd this took me hours and hours! Nicodemus’s neurotransmitters had kicked off, creating error after mistake after cock-up! It was a frustrating time, and in the end, I had to give up.

I got my nosh going. I’m sure I’d ordered some battered fish on Iceland’s order, so to make room for them in the freezer, I had some, with the potato letters and peas.

I was suddenly all in again. No concentration left, and the right side of me was jumping and jerking, shoulder (SSS), and leg, which was threatening to do a Neuropathy Pete involuntary right-leg Neuropathic Schuhplattler dance. But it didn’t, just stayed with its mini-palpitations throbbing away to its heart’s content.

I’ll have to finish this in the morning.

Good morning!

I got the nosh prepared, not sure how I didn’t fall asleep doing it, though. I was wearied, worn-out and worryingly hebetudinous. But, hunger helped me continue. The meal was worth 6.5/10, no doubt a reduced rating, due to my being so done-in.

I tucked in, then fell asleep after eating the meal. Woke a few minutes later thinking it was time to get up, I edged my Billy Bunter body and saw the pot of yoghurt laying unbroken, where it had rolled to, on the carpet. A dilemma now; Do I struggle to get up and retrieve the lemon curd yoghourt? Is it worth the monumental effort? Am I that keen on eating it? Yes, I was… wasn’t I?

It didn’t matter, cause I fell asleep again!

When I stirred once more, minutes later, I must have been dreaming about this quandary over the tub of dessert, because I found myself reaching for the yoghourt ith the long picker-upperer, and throwing it in the waste bin. How I managed this physically was something of a miracle. Did I actually do it, or imagined doing it? Will I wake up in the morning and tread on it? On and on the Thought-Storms raged!

Looking back, I wasn’t even sure that I wasn’t dreaming all of this?

I nodded off again, waking up again, wanting a wee-wee. As I had got up and was catching my balance, the agony from the mystery growth under the foot, made me jump a bit, no a lot! Got the wee-wee taken, staggered untidily to wash my hands, back to the c1968 recliner, got down painfully on the ringed cushion, (I’d missed the centre and started Harold’s Haemorrhoids stinging). I added recent events to the notepad. (Not that I could read the scrawl easily in the morning)

Oh, dearie me, I’d left the light on! Crying was an option, but self-loathing was stronger, and I silently cursed myself, got up to turn off the light, and suffered when the new papule, or whatever it is under the foot gave me more discomfort.

I think I had another discussion with the boss, Mr G. Mostly inquiring as to why he bothered to let me be born, maltreated me. Gave me so many defeats in life. And was now giving me agony, frustrations and confidence-destroying failures? I got no answers!

Failing to get back to sleep, I realised as I lay there discussing things with the Thought-Storm, I probably deserve the luck I’m getting, fir things I have done in early life. I tried to recontact Mr G and apologised for bothering him.

Guilt? Yes!