INCHIE TODAY: Saturday 18th March 2023

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The bladder seems to still have its infection,
So for me, this means a painful erection…
Fear not; my last one was during the 1962 election,
Today the Whoopsies, Accifauxpas… botheration!
A quagmire of questions and quandaries,
Most of them were beyond my comprehension,
Carer Jo-Anne helped me with her suggestion…
To solve the problem of leaking Catheterisation!
We used bag-sealing wires for the prevention…
The pee filled my slipper on more than one occasion!
The loose valve was causing non-stop urination…
We tried another pouch; it was a duplication…
We found time and spirit for shared cachinnation…
At first unaware of urine escaping…
I went into the kitchen, with the wee-wee dripping…
Slipped on the wetness, tumbled, causing a contusion…
Jo-Anne arrived to see my confusion,

She asked me, “Whatever are you doing?”
She soon found there was a temporary solution.

Course it fell off when she’d gone, more pollution!
Did the carpet with an air spray & Dettol solution,
Moped the kitchen floor, forever cleaning!
Then got a letter from the Medical institution!

From the Consultant Surgeon, Urological…
Seems I may need a permanent catheter to widdle,
The best option would be a bladder reconstruction (Neobladder).
But not for me; too old & I’ve had bladder cancer,
Being on Warfarin makes the op too big a chancer,
So, for me, it’ll be a permanent Catheter,
Looked it up on the web; the result was not at all festal!
Messy, a hole in my stomach for the tube…expediential…
If I had to choose, I’ll be in a fuddle…
Not much gets me feeling frantical…
The options put me ferhoodled…
Dementia Doreen means I’m not really docible,
Making decisions, I’m not notable…
Still, my concerns are only ephemeral…
I’ll let others decide; someone reputable,
I’ll just be culpable and covenantal.

QUICK RECORD OF THE DAY
Moped up the escaped from the Catheter Pouch Wee-wee, used the speed-mop twice, and a lot of Dettol!

The fifteenth dollops of kitchen towels used on where the urine had trickled for an hour, without my realising it. Tut!

The waste bags with the slippers, socks and used kitchen towels well wrapped up and sealed, awaiting removal.

Much better colour in the next emptying of the pouch.
Possible something to do with it having been left running for an hour or so?

Bootiful lunchtime clouds!

Car park below from the kitchenette.
With a now clean unsmelly floor!

Afternoon views
Pareidoliaing clouds.

Nearest they came to sunset photos…
Pareidoliaing again…
Pareidoliaing, a shark or whale in the depths?

Pareidoliaing: Eyes, nose & mouth of what, though?
Pareidoliaing? Erm…
A not-red Red Dwarf view? Hehe!
The Sun’s last effort to burst through again
Toodle-pips!

A terrible photo of the simple meal.
Tomatoes with basil, sea salt & oregano.
Some (Many) vegan mini sausages…
A coup[le of bread rolls to help soak it up.
In the morning, after eating this load of nosh,
I woke to find about five empty crisp packets in the bin!
Guilt, shame and mystery as to how I did this and not remember?

Wishing You All Veritable Fortunes!

INCHIE TODAY: Thursday 16th 2023

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Well, what a brilliant con artist she is!
It’s worth reading this to see what & how she did it.
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Do you know… are you listening?
There were times today; I’m not kidding…
When I almost knew what I was doing!
Twelve goes at the Catheter irrigating,

There must be summat else, it’s irritating…
So much I keep on forgetting,
Doreen Dementia’s
inquinating…
My memory, she’s masticating…
The Doctor’s ready for cognoscing,

My concentration is cadencing,
I await good luck commencing,

My brain is beyond assubjugating.
I suppose all this should be heartbreaking?
But a chance of some little ameliorating…
I’ve got cheesy potatoes in the oven baking!

I can smell the cheese as it’s melting…
I bet this is going to taste belting!

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20:15hrs now. Another day flashes by.
What I’ve done and why.
Who’s been to see me?
Can’t remember, can’t decree…
Been a sad muddled day for me!
So, some photos you can see,
Feeling so confused, I could cry!

First Pouch emptying…

Before the mist descended.

Food order. Some treats for the Carers.

One of the afternoon pouch emptying.
Amazing colour, healthy looking!

Nice parking today!

Mug of Glengettie, note-less notepad,  and a nose bleed.

Blimus! This one filled up quickly.

Late Carer Josef called. Only needed some painkillers to ease the mild agony from the Catheter bag tube in Little Inchy. Argh!

NOSH TIME

The plan was to show a photo of the served-up nosh here.
However: The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry!
No matter how carefully a project is planned, something may still go wrong with it. The saying is adapted from a line in “To a Mouse” by Robert Burns: “The best-laid schemes o’ mice an’ men / Gang aft a-gley.”

Yes, Inchie forgot to put the SD card back in the camera again!
So the evening shot and shot of the TV on, also, 
as Rabbi Burns said… “Gang aft a-gley “.

When I emptied night pouch,
I did remember to put the car in first. Tsk!

Not a good colour.

When I was nodding off, I needed to utilise the.
again. The visit took me half an hour
or so overall. Sticky, gooey, messy. The actual
evacuation maybe lasted a minute.
The cleaning up & medicating… ages!
Costly business nowadays. Last year the above cost me
£2.19 – Now… £4.99! But it does a good job of easing .

On that rather sordid note, I’ll leave you now. (Fri Morning)
And get this blog checked. (I’m bound to miss some mistakes, of course, I’m getting good at that recently) and sent off to WordPress.

TTFN Each!

INCHIE TODAY: Wednesday 15th March 2023

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I woke after what I believed was a six-hour dream, and the memory of the ‘Gone-Missing-Laundry’ came to mind; as I was getting depressed and morbid at the prospects of having no dressing gowns, spending a fortune to replace them and the throws that may turn up, or likely will never will, and the email from the bank asking for confirmation and why I have bought the same things that I~~ did three months ago…

Then the real worry came to me. Wearing trousers for the Brain Scan at the hospital which is going to produce at least agony to poor Little Inchy as the catheter tube pulls and tugs again his fungal lesion. Next, the thought of having no dressing gown to change into and get out of the pain-giving trews when I get home to relieve the pain hit me… Argh!

A Mild Depression Dawned!
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When I forced my tormented body and mind to rise from the depths of the second-hand, £300, charity shop bought, crumb-retaining, microorganism-microbe producing, gungy, moth-eaten, beige-coloured, non-working, bacillus encouraging, incommodious, Haemorrhoid Harold testing, c1968 recliner, I found that the Catheter punch contents were…


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At the highest level of colouration on the chart.
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I think there may be a slight chance, remote possibility, hundred-to-one shot, that today may not be a good one. Then again, when was my last good day?
was not too hopeful of finding my ‘taken-away-to-be-laundered clothing’. The chances, must be slim, but she did say she’d have another look around for me.

Found my laundry.
But no throws in there.

Morning:
CorelDraw not letting me add any photos.
Trouble getting into WP.
Mousee taking me left & right, not up and down?
Fearing the worse here…

INCHIE TODAY: Tuesday 14th March 2023

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The laundry, containing three nightgowns, I have another that I’m wearing at the moment that is getting a smidgeon whiffy, appears to have been lost or returned to the wrong client. I’m scared to send any more stuff to the laundry. The value of these dressing gowns is infinitesimal… no, sorry, I meant inestimable; Purely for the pain relief they give me from wearing trousers with the tube inserted into Little Inchie, thus causing agony, and .
So, when indoors, I do not wear trousers at all, just one of the now sadly gone missing at the laundry dressing gowns.
Tomorrow, I must get the trews on again to go to the QMC for the first brain scan. Lift arriving at 12:30hrs – lift home at 15:30hrs. Easy-Link confirmed this on a telephone call today. Bless them. The thought of having no dressing gown to wear when I return is galling. I dare not go around with just a gown on when someone other than Carers is due.
I can almost feel the pain from trouser-wearing already. Argh!

There may not be a blog tomorrow – I’ll see how things go, time-wise.

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With no larger night bags available – I came close to having an explosion of urine showering this morning. Talk about overfull!

The ankles were a smidge swollen, and the ankle ulcers were more prominent than they usually are. No pains, though.

After a pot of porridge, onto the computer.

Two photos of rare morning glimpses of the sun.
Not good ones, mind.

An absolute pleasure doing some pareidoliaing
Especially with these cloud-creatures in view.

In the afternoon, the sky became almost of an
oh, so pretty Sepia colouring.

Bootiful!

At last, the urine had cleared on the third emptying.
But, on the seventh one… Oh, dearie me!

Silly me got these out of order. These
ones are from the waking half-hour when.
I wandered around the rooms in the dark
taking pictures. Why? No idea!
But here they are…

Tatters in the slow cooker.

Suddenly not feeling very well.
I’ll pack up now, don’t want to be
unprepared for the Brain scan tomorrow.

AMAZING (To me) SUNSET SHOTS
Early in the evening, ghost-clouds, Awesome.
Back to the brown beauties!.
Gone from view sun, the sky goes back to blue?
Nightie-night!
What a series of changes in colour. Never seen this before.

came again. No signs of the laundry being found. This could be costly; three dressing gowns, a bath towel, woolly hats, the Carers’ chair throw, and likely more stuff that went into the bag and will have to be replaced. That is if I don’t mysteriously find the bag hidden somewhere… and if they cannot be located, of course. There is always a chance they may come across them. I kept thinking maybe there were not taken and searching the room… repeatedly; but I never found the bag.
I’ve had to order some more dressing gowns, but can’t get them delivered before next week, cost me well over £100 quid.
Not much goes right for me… You might have noticed? Huh!

No meal tonight as such. Had a pot noodle, made and added some gravy, and dunked a bread roll in it. Nice!

Got my head down. Nodded off pretty quickly, and it felt as if I had a dream that went on all night. I didn’t wake up once! But the dream, that was of my journeying on a bus somewhere, and it kept getting lost… things seem to be in the 1950s, a conductress in the Bristol Lodekka bus.

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It went on and on…

Ah, Well, Evening all!

INCHIE TODAY: Sunday 12th March 2023

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It’s genuinely difficult to write this little overview,
And wanted to write it in rhyme, too!
I’m not going to start moaning… I’ll try not to…
Naturally, I can’t promise you,
My brain used to act as an autocue…
Now, Wednesday, I’ve another brain scan due,
Dementia Doreen has me as a detenue & détenu,
It’s difficultest to maintain logic & virtue,
There is no point now in taking any long view…
It’s a battle to wash, dress, and take a poor!
Whatever can I do?
I try to stay witty and not feel blue…
Price rises in rent, electricity, & food accrue,
Bad enough, but now the mind does miscue,
The eyes give me misty, mottled view…
The catheter pain, pouch replacement is overdue…
Without help, I can’t get on a sock or shoe!
Taking too many tumbles. walk into doors too!
Deafness worsening will continue…
But I’ll not give in, I promise you!
When I see St Peter and his gate crew…
There’s going to be a right hullabaloo!

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Sorry not have much on today; time beat me again…

This is the punch, one hour after emptying it. Not a lot?

Gloomy morning.

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Potatoes were put in the slow cooker and forgotten about again.
I can use them on Monday?

Email from Manor Laboratories in the USA. The Time-Machine Professor Billum and HRH Lisa-Petal, are going to ring me again: Bless them!
Being a logical Scientist, Billum asked which time would be bestest to make the call. I checked on next week’s calendar and sent a copy to the Manor. It was early Morning when I found this, hope  I got it right.

Yikes! This ain’t good.

Not so good view photos tonight.
Still, I’ve done worserer ones. Tsk!

The ‘In’s & Out’s of it’ continued today.
I think I had many more than yesterday.
Which resulted in dozens of mini-mind-blanks.
As for  recalling what I was doing… well?

Gotten Himmel!
I think it looked worse than what it was. The light shining on the masculine, jealous-making to others, postmarked scarred, blotchy right leg makes the blood in the bag seem darker than it really is. No? .
 The pouch seemed ready to explode as well.

The vegetarian casserole went down well. I’d seasoned t with some Henderson’s sauce, sea salt, 7-Mediterranean vegetables sauce, and tomato passata with basil, and a vegetable Oxo cube. Oh, yes, and a sprinkling of some imitation soya-bacon crumbles.
I gave this a Taste Rating of 7.4/10. Not bad at all.

Sweet Morpheus was not keen on helping me again, and I ended up putting the TV on, that usually guarantees me nodding off. Well, it did this time… But unfortunately, it took a couple of hours longer than usual

Evening, all!
Well, Morning all then. Hehe!

INCHIE TODAY: Saturday 11th March 2023

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Heck of a shock here today! The NHS input site advised me to ring NHS 111 starlight away, So I did!
But they were too busy and told me to visit the NHS 111 site. So, I did.
An hour later, I filled in the questions asked & guessed at the choices made.
Sent it off and was told someone would contact me later. They are very busy, and this may take some time, be patient. So, I did!
I went to make a brew, and the telephone rang – I was surprised I heard it in the kitchen, but, there you are, I did.
Answered many questions and had to guess at a few. The nurse had an accent, and the kine was not good, so it took a time to review all the needed details. Ultimately, she decided that the SYSs 128, and 119, with respective DIAs 57 and 59, were okay? This despite the NHS monitoring site telling me it was Too Low and to ring 111?
Don’t feel too confident about this. But then again, it’s unsurprising; they are the lowest readings I’ve ever had?

Well, the lowest B~P readings ever, advised to ring 111 – told to go online, spent ages sorting required details. Told it was okay. And earlier, this above when I woketh up. Similar farces these two. If the blood in the wee is level 6 or 7, I’m supposed to ring 111 – Ha!

I was woken up (Didn’t get settled until around 04:00hrs) and was woken by the arrival of Carer Sam. I was half out of it, having just been stirred reluctantly back to life. Think we had a chinwag, and Sam took the washing nada waste bag on her way out. Thank you.

Porcelain Throne visited, cleaned up the kitchen, dropped the milk bottle, and stubbed my toes again. The brain was not too interested in being creative and went on strike a few times when I got nothing done whatsoever; just seemed to sit here thinking but not knowing why or what of?

The yes were still bad, and concentration as well.
Dizzy Dennis, The Kathleen Catheter tube, and Anne Gyna all gave me bother of some sort. I really was only half here for many hours. Scary!  Sort of light-headed, I suppose… mind you, I still am now seven hours later.

Lost the camera but found it a few hours later, hidden in front of me to the right of the computer – How the hell did I miss that?

Liberty-Global Virgin Media went down.
I made a brew and fell asleep for a while…
A while? Four bloody hours!

Carer Jo-Anne arrived; I was still a bit vague about things.
After the gal left… Ah, it was Jo-Anne I think that tool the washing? I could be wrong; of course, it has been known.

No sunset tonight. Boo!

Found the camera.
Lost the eye drops.
Sadly no chance of any sunset tonight… Sob!

Took early evening shots.

A couple of hours late, these…

Very little snow left now

Then got the soup and put the potatoes and soya bits in with it,
then the seasoning. But could not find the mint sauce?
Are a lot of things disappearing today?

Looking okay to me.

Blogging for another hour or two.
Got about ten minutes’ worth of work done, Huh!

Carer Ayowoke arrived. The first time I’d seen him. Nice lad. He gave me a roster for next week, no Carer Richard in it! I asked if he knew anything about Richard, but he did not know him.

Did some more effort on this blog, but I still can’t get my head around the
NHS telling me to ring NHS 111, and then eventually, telling me to log onto the web with NHS 111. After having to log in all my details, telling me
that the Blood Pressure figures were okay?

I got the nosh on and served up.
Another part-canned meal.
A can of Asda Chunky Lamb & Vegetable soup.
Couldn’t find the mint sauce to add to it,
I think maybe it may have gone out of date? (Spit!)
Added vegetable stock and some Pertranic,
Cooked & sliced potatoes, just one finger knick!.
Soy bacon thingies added; the final bit…
Wholemeal rolls for me to dunk and dip!
And soon, I’d demolished it!
Eating every morsel and bit!
Flavour Rating: 705/10.

The late Carer was Carole-Anne.
Still no .
We had a mini natter & laugh. Refreshing!

acci-whoopI woke up as my ginormously flabby body hit the floor!
Landing conveniently on my bottom, but rather, unfortunately, the burst open .
It was the mess of sorting things out that got to me rather than the bleeding itself. Handily, it was almost easy to get me back up on my bloated feet and legs… The first job was to check .
I placed some paper towels inside the Protection Pants first, then looked over the pouch, grippers and tubing. All seems to be still attached.

Off to the wet room, giving the door frame a mini shoulder-charge as I went in. That hurt more than anything else did. Hehehe! I didn’t fret about this being half asleep; I expected that ,   and would cause me some problems.
Even joined in with an . Only a little one, but enough for me to knock the Germoloid, Daktacort and Savlon creams off of the floor cabinet. Then after the haemorrhoids were treated… the always ‘Painful-Job’ of Cleaning up and ointmentationing !

 After a multitude of Argh! – Ouches, curse words and loathings, and a moment of ‘Why Me Mate’ emotions, it was done.

REFLECTIONS

I was amazingly calm and physiological about things… at least, I think I was? That’s probably not the word I should have used?
It could have been a sign of my acceptance of the circumstances or my rotten luck?
I may have been sick to the back teeth (mind you, there’s only one of them left in the mouth now) of hearing myself moan and whining on about my inabilities, ailments, frustrations, Accifauxpas, Whoopsiedangleplops, eyesight, hearing, Cathy Catheter pains, shortage of pouches, and the seemingly never-ending Bladder-Infection. Being bald, overweight, Duodenal Donald, Little Inches Phimosis and fungal lesion, Peripheral Neuropathy, having two strokes, being shot twice, scared shit of going in water.
Now, there’s the , and the 80 40 0 lurgy. The palpitating of the mechanical ticker. The almost persistent No help attainable for things like the computer and letters that are either too small or complicated for me to hear, see or understand? This will, I assume, be due to the attention gleaned of…
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But I don’t complain…
Hahaha!

INCHIE TODAY: Thursday 9th March 2023

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A bright morning with snow.

Bright-looking urine in the bag is good!

Down to just four visits today.

Email from Asda – order on its way.


Made a brew of Glengettie.

Asda order arrived.
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Pondered on whether to have casserole for a nosh?
Put the rest of the fodder away.
Fridge before and after delivery.
Note that it is not full!
Tried the Vegan butter later. It didn’t
spread well, but tasted grand!

Took some more view photos of the light snowfall. See
above… Not the houses, which I reckon must either have
a Cannabis farm in the loft, that, or they are so rich
that they can afford to heat the attic? Hehehe!

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The footfall in the snowfall, in the bottom field.

Later, a man and his dog caught my attention.
Well, it was the wildly wagging tail of the dog
mainly. Boy, that dog loved the snow!

During the day, I had the attention of Carer Josef,
Carer Adele, also & I think Carer Carolynne.
But since the arrival of
any name could well be the wrong one.
Sorry about that!

The snow gave us another covering.

Throne visit six attended. Every one of the
previous sessions were a watery-gurgling mess.
This one was the complete opposite..
lost out to the new King
of the Throne’s return – !
followed the evacuation.

Then, I walked into the door frame on my way out...
And pulled the  tubing
that was stuck in Little Inchie. Naturally, this left poor
.
Undaunted by this mini-series of acci-whoopS,
I made a refreshing mug of Thompson’s Punjana tea…
Taking the first drink of it at the computer,
gave me a nudge,
and the mug and tea dropped from my grasp!
Of course, I took this in my usual casual, calm,
devil-may-care-but-not-me nonchalance.
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I was close to crying with frustration!

I made the meal of the day…
I’d forgotten about the potatoes in the slow cooker. Not that
I needed them; I’d gone a smidge.OTT without them.
The plant butter on the bread rolls tasted wonderful.

Did a bit on this blog, mostly getting things wrong, lost
all concentration as my eyes failed, and my head
drooped. I gave up!

Would you believe it? Another visit!