Wednesday 19th October 2022

POLITICAL CARTOON

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A proper short one this time, sorry.
But, it took me that long to get the.
Monday blog updated (15:00hrs) & I
must rush cause I’m out tomorrow for
the Covid booster. TTFN.

Up at 03:30hrs: Worked on yesterday’s ode until 05:30hrs. Then off to the Porcelain Throne. Easier today! I set the alarm off by accident in the dressing stage, didn’t know I’d done it, but I thought I heard a voice in the flat. Had a look around and saw the alarm box flashing. Apologised.

Morning Views

Richard arrived, Yawningly – he was so tired. But, we managed a little natter and laugh, even a moan about things to each other. He was reluctant to take the freebies in thanks, but I sulked, and he took them. Hehe!

Was noisy again.

I literally got lost in everything I tried to do today.

Got a call from a woman. The only words I caught were Virgin Media?

I got some potatoes on with the black bean sauce; I hope it works out alright.

In the amber, nearly the green!

Grrreat!

PHOTOS?

CARE IS DUE SOON MUST GET SOME MOSH SORTED

Just getting the meal served up, and Kylie arrived.

She helped me prep the meal. Then got the medications given. Had a laugh and natter, which was nice. Took the bags with her as she left.

Back to the meal, for me.

I soon demolished it!

TTFN

Inchcock: Thursday 13th October 2022

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06:00hrs: I woke my better-than-nothing four-hour kip. I waited for my brain to kick into gear, but it didn’t. So, in a sort of auto-mode, I decided to get the ablutioning done. I thought it best, in case the Carer arrived early.

But, No! , by the time I’d risen, the driven brain had started and decided I’d do the first after all.

I must admit that there was a little agitation brewing at this course of actioning change! Why? How? I was certain I was going to get sphygmomanometerisationing done. But somehow or other ended up getting the clothes ready, and yet I still drifted into the wet room? I still hadn’t really grasped what I was doing until I was lathering up for a shave. It was so unreal. Had done the Health Checks and had a memory blank? No, no… it was at her worst, toying with me.
So, I stopped shaving; and got back into the front room. This time I did set about sphygmomanometerisationing. It took me ages to get them done, then the graphics, and then I totally forgot about doing the ablutions?
This is not easy for me to relate to.

I got puzzled at first at the grading the NHS site gave for Blood Pressure. I had two results in the Green, so expected to overall at least be in the amber this time. Again, No! I ended up deeper in the Hypertension 1+ area than yesterday! Erm?
Then, the body temperature, which has been so good, I thought lately, had tumbled down into the Low-Red area. I think I’ll just print them off and not bother fretting over whatever the results are in future. I imagine the arithmophobia is partly the reason things do not seem right to me. Ah, I think I may have got the numbers mixed up?

After a while, I went to make a brew of Thompson’s Punjana tea… but ended up making a mug of Co-op 99. I know this is not earth-shattering, but it’s indicative of my state of mind this morning.
I’m trying to find the words for this. ‘Puddled’ comes to mind.

I took these shots of the view from the kitchenette window.

Then, I remembered the needed to be done.
Back to the wet room, and the need for the arose. Down on the plastic seat, and as it has been for a few days now, Constipation Conrad ruled. No torpedo today, though. After what felt like an hour of pushing and hurting in an effort to start the evacuation, suddenly, the pain eased, followed by a series of plopping into water-sounds. Haha! This time, there was some bleeding from .
I restarted the shaving that I stopped many hours ago. Just the two tiny . Had another stand-up session and no showering.

  Arrived later than usual. Well, it’s not unusual on the last day of his shift. I got that wrong! is toying with me today. Richard was yawning a little, but far less than last Thursday (He didn’t come last Thursday!) We had a chinwag, and he sorted out the Covid booster for me. He’s a good lad.

WordPress Comments. Esther arrived. Updated Wed blog. Jenny called to see how I was. CorelDraw to make graphs as needed.

Deana called to say the EasyLink lift was arranged for 10:20hrs in the morning. I mentioned the Covid Booster, and we worked out which one to go to would be best. She tried to get it at Riverside tomorrow, but she had no free time near that. She then got it booked at Carrington Pharmacy for Thursday 18th, at 10:45hrs. She’ll try her best to book a lift there with EasyLink for me.

Belatedly I got onto Pinteresting. Made a meal (took a photo of it, but I left the SD card in the computer – Spit!
Carer Sinead arrived, always social event and laugh.

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Friday 26th August 2022

Opening Political Cartoon
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I woke up and was on my way to the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket) within 30-seconds of stirring back into ersatz life! With managing to almost fall out of the £300, second-hand, c1968, charity shop-bought, eyesorely-horrendously grungy coloured, Harold Haemorrhoid-testing, easily-falloutable from, unfit-for-use, not working, recliner last night. I don’t know how I didn’t lose contact with the Amazon-bought, uncomfortable, plastic-peeling-off-of swivel chair! Hahaha! Yes, I’d fallen asleep at the computer!

The wee-wee was of the variety of UTD (Unwilling-Trickling-Dribbling) and CM (Cessational-Micturitional dribbling). The after-dribble after the initial wee-wee, possibly tool three times longer!
As I turned back with the bucket to be emptied held in my hands, I stubbed my toe against the ottoman! My reaction to saving the bucket from being dropped; was nothing short of a miracle. I dropped it, but not from a great height, and the liquid stayed in the bucket. Naturally, as the pain shot up the leg to the brain, I merely laughed it off. No cursing whatsoever.

I got the bucket emptied, sanitised and disinfected, and got on with the task of sphygmomanometerisationing.
I was jolly-well pleased with the Blood

Pressure figures. I put them in the medical site’s programme and returned this descriptive graph. I remembered that the Riverside Diabetes meeting for today had been cancelled as I was doing the readings.
I added my graphics to it in the name of entertainment… and because I love making them for a bit of fun.
After four days in the red zone, one day nearly of-off the graph: Things seem much improved today. Back in the amber area, that’s where I like it to be as well. Although two years ago, I had one day in the green Zone. Yes! That’s been my target ever since! If I live long enough, I might achieve this.

Aha! My spirits rose enormously! This morning’s Carer was Carol-Anne! Not seen her for months, many months. I thought she’d left to be honest.
What a precious gal. I had to give her a kiss and cuddle on her arrival. Carole didn’t mind, bless her. She spoke of the extra hour on Fridays, not having been since it was so-called arranged. I explained: It was initially for the Carer to do the laundry. But sometimes the laundry would come back not dried, and the clothing wrinkly. Also, I had not had socks, bobble hats, and shirts returned. Conversely, I have made a hand towel, tea towel, and pair of ladies’ knickers. I’m still paying for the hour, even though I’m paying Esther to do the laundry. She does a good job, and Esther hangs up the trews and shirts for me. Also as well as and besides that, she sews missing buttons on for me. Carol and I had an excellent nattering session, mostly me bemoaning my plight with the Diabetes, PN and Doctors farce. As I was paying for the hour, she lent me an ear. Hehehe! She checked the dates on the stuff in the fridge for me, cheese and ready meal found out of date. She will talk with my Doctor for me when she gets back to work. Carol has a few days off, going with her Mum away for a while. Great! She had to rush off after the hour, another call to make.

I spent many hours on CorelDraw before getting onto the blogging. Most of it was accompanied by Herbert’s mechanical concert from above. Percussion and drums mostly, with an odd clunk, throw in for good measure.

It was well into the afternoon before I started the daily ode and cartoon-creating. But I love doing the blog. Sometimes my hoard of followers and fans comment on them, you know. Why, on one day, only last month, both of them did!

That took a while too. Better get summat to eat before the evening carer arrives. Now then, what’s in the fridge freezer to have? I shall investigate… hang on; I’ve got some potatoes already on the boil.

Hang on, I’ve got to get the Warfarin tablets cut. So, I will do that. All done!
I’ll get a meal of some sort sorted out. Potatoes, tomatoes, and pretend fish sticks, it looks like. Good job. I’ve got the JS order coming on Sunday. It’s looking bare in the fridge after throwing away the short and out-of-date food. Tsk!

I’ll have a rummage around to see what can be found. To make a decent meal… Doreen makes me feel a schlemiel!

Well, I managed to knock up a half-acceptable-looking plate of fodder.
Imitation fish sticks, crispy onions, tomatoes, gherkins and those terribly-tasteless so-called by J Sainsbury, new potatoes. The overall flavour score was 6.4/10. The tomatoes and pretend fish sticks were not bad.

Arrived late, into that it mattered to me. Two Carers, one presumably a trainee. I was in a half-daze from being rudely awakened (Haha!), so I cannot say who it was that came or what happened. I recall telling them to help themselves to a treat on the top of the bookcase. Then walking to the door with them to lock it and wishing them well.

After that, I got down in the recliner again and started to watch the end of the heartbeat programme. I and my nodding off again. I woke for a wee-wee with a mammoth amount of

Back to the TV, nodded off again, and woke for another wee-wee! With the regulation .

Fell asleep again and woke up with the Dirty Harry film being shown; it was just starting. I decided to try and enjoy viewing it and bugger the sleeping. Ah, I like Clint Eastwood films.

At least another ten or twelve times and had to have four more wee-wees.

Woke up with the film credits scrolling down the screen! Well, that was Farcical!

I was worn out by then.
One final wee-wee with , and off to the wet room to clean and freshen up. Changed into new PPs, of course.
Straight off into the land of nod when got down again.
Overnight, I had to force myself awake eight more times for a wee-wee! Each one was short and sharp. Thankfully there were no more leakages, seepages or in these ones.

What an Oddlimost day!

ENDING POLITICAL CARTOON

Thursday 25th august 2022 – Diary, Cartoons & Ode

Cartoon to start with a laugh!

I didn’t get up this morning because I was already up before midnight. Sweet Morpheus is not happy with me and is withholding his services. Hehe! The Swine! I spent a few hours finishing off the Wednesday blog and got it sent off.
Then the sphygmomanometerisationing had to be tackled. What happened with the Photographicalisationings I don’t know; the first one looks like a terribly bad effort! Well, it was! But, the BP results greatly improved over the last four days. Just look where the cross was placed this morning. ♫Way down♫ – as the Elvis song went! Hehe! I liked that later song of his. Poor Elvis, drugs and beefburgers got to him. Shame!

Right in the amber zone! I decorated the return graph in celebration of the miraculous drop in BP! I saw that the body temperature was way down, and it’s been so good lately. I can’t win them all!

Arrived A little earlier than usual. But the lad saw how tired and drained I was, straight away he picked up on it, and he asked what had happened. I told him about the no-sleep night. He proceeded to get the medications sorted, licked up his bag of treats, and said he was leaving early, so I could get back to bed to try again. So no nattering like yesterday, Tsk! Richard said as he left that he was going out for the day with his Sister, So that cheered me up a bit; he doesn’t get out much, good for him!

I got a landline call come in. It was a lady at the Riverside Centre about tomorrow’s Diabetes Defence lesson. The meeting has been cancelled because the room is not available. ? It’s been rearranged fro next Friday instead. I phoned ILC, Warden (Independent Living Coordinator), Oberstgrüppenführeress and Lap-Top Dancer Deana, and she kindly rang the taxi transport to let them know. ♥

I took this using the Lumix camera, as the Canon no longer lets me take photos. I don’t know what I altered or the wrong selections I made when I pressed the go button; I got a beep-beep-beep, and a red icon flashed. Then the camera turns itself off. I’m in a pickle now as the eyes get steadily worse every day, even using the spyglass. Which is not a good idea! Cause if Cataract Cathy doesn’t get me, PN Pete does, and I’ve already dropped the new-‘old’ Lumix at least three times!

Oh, I forgot the photo of the legs I took earlier. Not a pretty sight. But, then again, they’ve been worse, so they’ll do. At least they were not stinging or hurting much at all.

Made a start on this template at long last. And heard that off unrecognisable noise was back again. Sounds like it’s coming from above. It sounds like a motor running, whining. Still, it won’t stop my sleeping… Sweet Morpheus had done an excellent job of that already. Then, made up this Ode. It took a while.

Odes to Sweet Morpheus…

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Blimus! It’s nearly 17:00hrs – What happened to the day? I think maybe I fell asleep in the computer chair. I certainly hope I didn’t have another Mind-Blank. Oh, dearie me! The day’s done for me now. Weird or what?

I’ll get a meal made then. Humph! The evening Carer is due soon.
I took what I thought was a great photo of the meal on the serving tray. But, yet again this time on the Lumix, the photo is displayed on the viewer window. But in the morning when I got to put the pictures on the computer, this one and two others had disappeared into the either? All a part of the mysteries and enigmas of Woodthorpe Court! The ghosts, wraiths, spectres, cacodemons, apparitions and other grotesqueries haunt the hallways and lobbies, searching for me to create ambiguities, abstrucities, perplexities, misfortunes and botherations, to scare, worry and baffle me!

Jozeph arrived. Mentioned that I looked shattered, and that cheered me up; Hehehe! He was right, of course. Jozeph sorted the medications and was soon off, kindly leaving me to get some sleep.
I stripped off and got the TV back on to watch a Heartbeat episode. As soon as I felt the eyelids drooping, I turned off the box. And blissfully sank into a welcome deep sleep, Ah!

Greatly annoying but unavoidable; over the next hour or so, I had to get up at least ten times for a wee-wee! Every one of them was of the SSSSAO (Short-Sharp-Sprinkly-Spraying-All-Over) variety. With varying degrees of PMAD (Post-Micturition-After Dribbling): so cleaning and sanitising were needed on most visits. I was getting somewhat agitated with all the interruptions. And hoped that things would settle soon in the bladder department soon.
After getting resettled in the second-hand, £300 charity shop bought, gungy beige coloured, rickety, c1968 recliner for about the tenth time, the wee-weeing suddenly stopped. Astounding!
GC sleepAI drifted off into a deep but dream-filled sleep. No specifics about the dreams… but I think I was enjoying them, though. Then…


I woke up due to the pain from Harold’s Haemorrhoids. As my bum hit the edges of the recliner as my body mass was slipping off the recliner!
I managed to stop the humungously overweight clump of a body from leaving the seat fully, But the rear end bleeding was soon apparent. So, up I struggled but made my way to the wet room for cleaning and medicationalisationing of poor Harold’s Haemorrhoids. During this, I did my best to remember the dream again. But no luck. I’d love to have known what I was doing in the sleep that was physical enough to have me out of the recliner? I got my lower rear region cleaned and medicated. Realising I’d lost any chance of getting back to sleep, I decided to stay up. Went to make a brew of Thompson Punjana tea and took this very strange time in the morning photo of the sky from the kitchenette window. Bootiful!

And I got the computer started. A lot of catching up and amending to get done this morning.

I woke up around 04:00hrs; Sat sitting on the computer chair, which is where I’d been sleeping! Ha!

LAST POLITICAL FUNNY

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