Inchcockski: Searching for Sanity & Logicality – In bad Rhyme!

Gerald James Timothy Algernon Archibald Inchcock

The Nottinghamian lad knows he is losing it, big time.

Mentally and physically, getting help is hopeless,

 He gets uptight, but he’s completely harmless,

Depressed, untidy, ill and charmless,

He can’t commit suicide, he ain’t got the time,

Even his words don’t properly rhyme!

 

WDP 1Lda

Inchcock: Sadly searching for Sanity

Somewhere, in his tortured labyrinth of a brain,

Lies logic, intelligence, but he can’t find them today,

The brain is active but rarely reliable or decisive,

Also, hesitant, feeble, and the memory’s gone away,

 Some details it retains, and admires he does say,

Mostly about medications, Red Dwarf and Will Hay,

 But his desire, longing for sanity, will not go away!

 

WDP 1L

 However, his efforts, hopes and plans are derisive,

 The mentality-seeking strategies are not conducive,

At least not for 74 years… that’s including today,

He redoubled his spiritual side, and started to pray,

Again in hopes, he’d be semi-sane again, one day,

He talks to his EQ, that’s hyper-sensitive.

 

WDP 1Lcb

He wrote to an Agony Aunt, that was digressive,

 He revealed all, and thought that was impressive!

She said she couldn’t help, and she was sorry,

But why did she throw herself under a lorry?

Inchy thought that was a touch impulsive and excessive!

Regaining logicality, will he ever find a way?

Or remain an idiot, until his dying day?

Another thing, why do his wee-wees always over-spray?

 

This blog was produced without a warning disclaimer.

No claims made for any educationalistical prowess of the author.

Donations and mental assistance will be gladly accepted.

In the event of the writer snuffing it, kindly donate to the Outer Peruvian Pregnant Kangaroo Appreciation Society, Nottingham Branch. 0115 999999.

Thank You

WDPT02L

Inchcock – Mon 18 Feb 2019: Warfarin Blood test and photographicalisationing from the Nottingham Wheel

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2019 Feb 18

Monday 18th February 2019

Welsh: Dydd Llun 18 Chwefror 2019

01:05hrs: Woke up after six hours uninterrupted sleep, feeling a lot better this morning. The customary wee-wee had to be taken, I used the Emergency Stand-by Grey Bin. Which had some content in it, that I could not remember doing? No pain with the releasing of the fluid. In fact, it was a VSWWW (Very short-Weak-Wee-wee).

The freeing of the horrendously bloated stomached body from the £300, c. 1968 recliner was done with ease. Oh yes! I took the grey bin to the kitchen with me for cleaning and disinfecting. That done, I got out the hypodermic, wax softener, and sphygmomanometer to start doing the Health Checks. I had to nip to the wet room for another wee-wee, again of the VSWWW type. Washed the dandies and wiped the contact surfaces with Dettol, and back to the kitchen and the Health Checking.

1Mon001

1Mon01Well satisfied with the resulting figures this time.

WD 0.31.0 Well, apart from the high pulse continuing to go up and up. I half-expect that I’ll blow-up at some stage later today. Hehe!

Then I needed to have a third VSWWW!

1Mon05aAfter which I had a look at the leg wound. I have to say: it looked a lot better. It felt better too!

Yes, it does look like a new growth is coming up to the side of it, but it looks far less tender and vividly coloured. Then I realised that this may be due to the fact that I’d just rested it overnight.

So I resisted getting excited and waited until later when I’d been on the pins a while and make another assessment then. The feeling that I had worms inside the leg continues, but not hurting. It would be so typical of my luck, that by the time I get the appointment for the treatment clinic, it will have gone down! Schlimazel!

Took the medications and updated yesterday’s diary and got it sent off to WordPress.

Went on the WordPress Reader section.

1Mon06Then I got some cornflakes for breakfast and watched some Youtube clips.

Got the ablutions tended to.

WD 0.31.0 The mystery of the missing toothbrush remains. Good job I held on to an old one.

Got dressed, made sure the camera was taken with me and set off to go to the surgery for the Warfarin Blood test, then to the City Centre to take some photographs from the Nottingham Wheel cage.

1Mon07I dropped into the Nottingham City Homes, Winwood Heights, Hauptbereitschaftsleiteress Warden’s Temporary HQ. Sarcasm & Insult distribution area. Tenants Socialisationistical Meeting Shed. Telling Inchcock off Zone. Where things like crockery and pottery get stolen from, Rumourmongering Clinic, and somewhere to rest while waiting for the bus, Portakabin. Warden and Opera singer Deana and International Champion Gymnast Warden Julie were working away in the office and holding cell. I paid for my TV licence while I was there. Mind you, with falling asleep so regularly when I try to watch owt on the box,1Mon07a I’m so glad I now get a cheaper licence. Hehe! Thanked them and set off at a fair pace, to hobble to the Carrington and the nurse.

The walk to the surgery was only hampered by two things. One, Back-Pain Brenda, who eased off when I got to the doctors.

WD 0.31.0 The other, as I got to the crest of the hill on Mansfield Road to go down into Carrington, a 1Mon07cdamned ignorant, antisocial, bullying swine of a Nottinghamian Pavement Cyclist made me jump as the moron shot by me from behind and made me jump. You can see him in the distance here.

Then, moments later, another one of the Pavement Cyclist actually hit me with his handlebar – and this one was pushing his bike on the pavement!

I arrived at the surgery and logged in with the receptionist. Sat down and had a go at the crossword book.

The leg wound thing started to hurt after I sat down? Then the cheering and delightful, uplifting sound of Nurse Nichole calling me to follow her arrived. As she took the blood for the INR test, she kindly explained some of the things I can expect when I eventually get to the medical centre to had the wound/infection looked at, and have the compression socks fitted. She also told me this usually takes two to three weeks after they test the sample. And advised me to keep the current socks pulled up above the wound at all times. I thanked her and handed over the nibble treats. Handed some to the receptionists, said my farewells and out to the bus stop to catch one to town.

1Mon07dI thought it seemed a bit nippier in the City Centre. I made my way straight down Queen Street into Slab Square. Went to the kiosk for the Nottingham Wheel ride, and when I’d paid my £6 Concession fee, I remembered last year and how I struggled to get up the steps and into the cage. 

WD 0.31.0 I struggled, even more, this time. An attendant chap kindly came half-way down the steps to assist me up. I did feel a fool!

WD 0.31.0 The doorway seemed much narrower than last year… but I was aware it was me who had grown broader and blobbier than last year!

WD 0.31.0 The plexiglass was filthy, smeared. The weak cold sunshine and reflections ruined many of my photographs.

WD 0.31.0 Each time my cage got to the top high up, the winds would blow the cage all about, making steady photograph taking a case of pot-luck, and on some turns up there, impossible!

Still, it made a change.

Here are a few of the resulting photographicalisations wot I took! Hehehe! After having to discard many lousy shots. 

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

In the morning, I made a post of all of the pictures taken and sent it off to WordPress. Please click here to see it, I fank you!

Nottingham Wheel Photographs

I exited the ride and somehow got down the various sets of stairways and onto the Slab Square and terra-firma. Off up to the bus stop and waited for the L9 to arrive.

WD 0.31.0 My mind went into one of its daydreaming-modes. I thought about Sister Jane, and that led to other memories of the old Meadows area of Nottingham. An Oxo cube in the basin for dinner, Dad, school, poor Mr Holmes, Mr Widdowson, Chris Wright, the debt collectors searching for Mother, the tin bath on the train wall outside with the WCs and coal-houses in the yard. Oh yes, the meditation of good and bad times was actually enjoyed. No feeling I was hard done by. As I came out of the daydream…

WD 0.31.0 I noticed the L9 bus pulling away from the bus stop! Klutz! So, I walked down, and fifteen minutes later, I caught the next 40 bus.

Got into the flat, and realised I had not had a wee-wee for hours and hours, and didn’t need one now. This surprised me at first; then I remembered I had not taken a Furesomide tablet.

1Mon12Hunger now dawned, so I set about making a nosh. A fish meal.

Garden peas, potato nuggets, tomatoes, battered fish sticks, erm, fingers I mean, and some mackerel in the tasty sauce. 

The last of the milk roll bread to soak up the sauce and make fish finger sarnies to eat. Hehehe!

1Mon13I took the meal things and washed them up.

The evening sky almost looked like artwork, I thought.

Once again, I planned the TV viewing that I fancied. Why do I bother!

Boon, Pie in the Sky, Law & Order and Sliders.

I didn’t get halfway through Boon before I’d nodded off! I got a bonus when I woke up later and saw the last two minutes of Pie in the Sky, though. Hehe!

Grumph! Hey-ho!

Virgin Media Goes Down Again. An ode from the Nottingham Pensioner

The Virgin Internet has gone down again.

So, feeling a tad sad and depressed,

The Nottingham Pensioner wrote in rhyme about life. Oh yes!

Why has his Virgin Internet gone down he did bemoan?

His frustration and infuriation had now grown,

Inchcock thought he’d do a poetic verbal moan,

Why when born his mother wanted to him disown?

Why so ugly, and doesn’t he know the meaning of homophone?

Why at five into the canal he was intimidatingly thrown?

Why is he Whoopsiedangleplop and accident-prone?

Why Mummy ran away leaving him and Dad alone?

Why his brother went into the army, his sister went off to Rome?

Why his Dad always refused to buy him a gramophone?

Why is romance to him, almost unbeknown?

Why since 1970, has his hair never grown?

Why in later years he never tried methadone?

Why he didn’t know, what was a pheromone?

Why does his deafness make other folks tut and groan?

Why he likes the sound of the clarinet and saxophone?

Despite his musical ignorance he seemed to like the tone,

Why he never got fed food that was home grown?

Why he didn’t realise he’d no garden just grey stones?

Why his falling in love Cupid had to postpone?

Why he did he not understand what is the ozone?

Why didn’t he like tripe, cow-heel and any currant scone?

Why was it him that always grazed his shin bone?

Why does he look like a weasel and not Stallone?

Why others used him as a stepping stone?

Why is he short on testosterone?

Why for misery, he’d make a perfect cicerone?

Why he had no spare cash, pounds, dollars or krone?

Why for morbidity and depression he’d become best-known?

Why, how has he become the perfect boring drone?

Why he had become pathetic and he hadn’t known?

Why he’s no longer the girl-pulling cyclone?

Why is he in pain from knees, fingers, shoulders & hip bone?

Why could he not have realised and foreknown?

Why can he not resist a chunter and miserable groan?

Why doesn’t he swear like others instead he says, ‘I’ll be blown’?

Why self-survival skills the idiot couldn’t hone?

Why when deaf does he have an old basic mobile phone?

Why does he live a solitary zombie-like life alone?

Why has his maturity just never grown?

Why in an aeroplane has he never flown?

Why is he a wimp without any backbone?

Why does he think he’ll one day be well known?

Why, unlike Galileo, he will remain forever unknown,

Why he isn’t destined to fame or to sit on a throne,

Why has he never tried and tasted zabaglione?

Why his emissions of wind are so very well known?

Why for his past failures he cannot atone?

Why confidence and ability, he does not own?

Why he fears reincarnation or someone making him a clone?

Why he lacks social skills and has no backbone?

Why he seeks a social outlet microphone?

Why he wants someone to adopt him or take him on loan?

Why do they keep attaching him to an Osteophone?

Why cyclist on pavements he just cannot condone?

But, why he’s cheered up now is not known… Yes, it is!

Virgin Internet’s back working & he’s on his WordPress Zone!!!