Saturday Diary & Ode: 17th September 2022

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To my cyber-buddy and fellow none-fitter-innerer Billumski!
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I think I had more sleep last night than I have in any week! Sadly, it was all in bits and pieces, broken by being woken and my habit of straying off doing things after I’d needed one of the several wee-wees. Also, some persistent Thought-Storms of an aggressive nature.

But I returned to the doubtful comfort of the £300, bought eight years ago from the second-hand shop, Harold Haemorrhoid testing, repugnantly beige-coloured, crumb containing, virus-breeding, acne-giving, rickety, none-working recliner; after each hobble about, or moving things around for no reason, and rearranging of a food cupboard. Why? I anticipate finding other things that I may well have done in my noctambulations later on.

I lay there, pondering over this and that, and anything and the bowels decided to try and evacuate the inner product of its own accord… There followed a sequence of events that were events that were worthy of the Comedy Sketch of a Year Award. I thank heavens there are no CCTV cameras in this flat!

①: I fumbled and bumbled my way up onto my feet; crumbs, the TV remote and a part-eaten packet of pistachio nuts hit the floor and spread all over the carpet..
②: No time for the waking-up to catch my balance routine, I grabbed Metal-Micky, and on the first imitation step, I found one of the pistachio nuts with my left foot.
③: So, as I crumpled onto the floor, my right knee found another escaped Pistachio nut!
④: I went through some pain getting up again, and was only concerned at that moment with getting to the in time… The narrow hallway walls sustain me getting into the wet room, for Metal Micky was laying somewhere in the front room wherever it was, I’d dropped him in the tumble.
⑤: The fight to get the pyjamas down delayed me and caused more panic; I tore them, in the end, to get them down quicker…
⑥: To no avail, I fear! The bladder and bowels won this one! They both started before my bum got down on the plastic .
⑦: At least things were over quickly, but they left me with I don’t know how long to put right and clean up the wet room, then the exit points had to be cleaned and medicated. Fortunately, I keep a supply of the PPs and large kitchen towels with the Germolene and Germolids to hand in the wet room. Along with the aftershave and plasters to steady any shaving cuts or leaks from Little Inchies Fungal Lesion while I’m doing the ablutions.

I can’t understand why now; no doubt it made sense at the time, but I felt a little smug at coping with these embarrassments and decided to get the done while I was in there.
The right knee was not in good shape after its attack on the Pistachio nut earlier. Hehe! in shaving, left me using the plasters and the aftershave to stop the bleeding! Little Inchies Lesion was not leaking; all were okay!   Oh, and the hair at the lower back of the head come neck is definitely growing again – white! I shaved it off.
After getting things all sorted, new PPs and socks (that were a hell of a job to get them on!) on, The right knee was now very tender!  I packed the affected PPs in the disposal bag and returned to get Metal Micky from the recliner room…
When I got back in the room, I thought I’d had burglars! I’d cleared the shelf above the electric fire of all the rubbish, and that had joined the crumbs and food on the carpet! Making it worse, a bottle of disinfectant I keep there for the wee-wee bucket had lost its cap when it got knocked over!
I’d also like to know how I managed to get Metal Micky left right in the corner her the bookcase? I think it would a physical impossibility, surely? Anyway, it was hard enough trying to retrieve it; I had to climb over the many fallen object to get to it – so I used the long picker-upperer. Cunning that, I thought!
I got Micky back with the stick and was almost on the verge of congratulating myself as I turned around and against the shredder. Another flipping moment!

I stopped doing everything. And mountaineered my way to the recliner, resisting crying, and just sat down and spoke to myself as calmly as I could… “This is not a good start. Fair enough, the bladder and bowels are out of your control, as are your fingers, feet, legs, shoulder etc… no good getting depressed, mate; it’s just how it is. What you need is some help when things like this happen. I agreed with myself, called myself a pratt, and did my belated balance exercise.
At this point, I noticed the clock… that was on the floor with all the other jetsam and flotsam – I checked with my watch, and they both indicated it was only 04:30hrs! Christ, what time did I get up then?

I swore to take things calmly from here on today. And tackled the mammoth job of cleaning and sorting things out in the room. I’m not saying I didn’t have a few moments of self-pity cause I did feel sorry for myself once or twice. But found the determination to just press on with the sorting. No rushing, doing it quietly. I got something out of it at the end of the task, I’d got three waste bags full of rubbish to go to the chute. Hahaha! Somehow or other, I perked up a smidgeon, too! It was well gone eight O’clock by the time I’d sorted the mess. Then I made a prayer for it not to happen again for a while, please.

It then dawned on me… the Morning Carer had not been yet? Quick as a flash, I realised it was a Saturday, so no fretting. Meridian was very late arriving last Saturday as well. They do have trouble getting staff at the weekend, it seems. Moments later, a call came in through the landline, and it was from Meridian.
The lady told me that the Carer was outside and could not get in. I took it as she was outside the building and told her to press the intercom 72 and I could let her in… then I thought I’d better check, and I inquired if she was outside the door or the flats? But the lady did not know. I said I’d get my walking stick and go have a look. Got the Wooden Wilmer stick, and I went to the door.
The Carer was outside of the flat door, complaining because she could not get the key lock code to work. I smiled gently, using one of my calming half-smiles, and told her I can’t either! And broke into a broad grin. That did it, I think; I caught her heart!   Hahaha! I explained that the door was not locked; sometimes, I forget to unlock it, but not often. If she presses this button, pointing out the door chime, I will hear it, but not anyone knocking on the door. I’m deaf, senile and decrepit, but that can’t be helped. She did larf! I liked her straight away.

Her name was Sinead, not seen before. I think she was from another assignment somewhere else; that’s why she was late, getting me added to her list. Nice gal, we had a little chinwag. She said she’d come again if she got the chance.

Well, I’ve still not done the Health Checks yet, better get them done. The last time I did them later in the day, the figures were down, so here’s hoping.

Well, that didn’t help much, doing it late, did it? Ah, well, as a part of my commitment to resist swearing, feeling sorry for myself and keeping calm, all I can say is: Hey-Ho!

Time to sort out something for dinner; no bother making up my mind today; I’ve a fancy for some chips and a veggie burger! The chips are oven ones that claim to be vegan. looking forward to trying them.
and Yet again, the photo I took of the meal has evaporated into the ether! I’d love to know how this happens; cause I took a look at it after shooting it and was pleased with the result. Come the morning, when I uploaded the last few photographs, there it was gone! Grrr!
The chips looked very tattie and were thick-skinned, but I did enjoy them all the same. Taste-Rating: 6.5/10.

Arrived, it was Sharon; I knew her name the second she told me after I asked her what it was! (Dementia Doreen again!) She didn’t stay long, but we managed a mini-natter before she chose her treats and departed.

Washed the pots, locked the door and a rinse, and made for the warmth of the rickety c1966 recliner. I feared that I may not be able to get back to sleep and put the telly on… but could I find anything worth watching? No!
I mused over which DVD to watch. Whilst doing so, I drifted off into Sweet Morpheus’ land… Nice!

Two hours later, I woke in desperate need of a wee-wee! The memories of this morning’s facial, embarrassing and painful events came flooding back.
Would I make it to the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket) in time without any more Accifauxpas? again, but I got things flowing without any disasters.
Stopping it flowing was the problem! The went on and on… I was almost tired out by the time it ended. Hehehe! I did have a mini during the leaking, but it only lasted for seconds – !

I felt the warm wet sensation when I pulled up the PPs. So, off I limped with Metal Micky to change the pants and clean up.
As I entered the wet room,
I stubbed my toe against the vicious, blood and bruise-bringing, metal, agony-to-use, brutal
!
I’m sure she had moved from this morning; I thought I’d put her safely out of the way behind the mop bucket… I’m sure I did! Now, she was near the sink? Obviously, the work of the mysteries of Winwood Heights, the ghosts, wraiths, spectres, cacodemons, apparitions and other grotesqueries haunt the hallways and lobbies, searching for Inchcock, to create ambiguities, abstrucities, perplexities, misfortunes and botherations, to scare. worry and confuse me! Or maybe .

That was the end of any thoughts of getting back to sleep again!

Inchcock Today Wednesday 24th August 2022

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I STIRRED IN THE DARKNESS,,, Hahaha!. No idea what time it was, but there was a determination on my part – not to get up. A ‘Sod-It’ approach was adapted; I’ve never had this before,,, well, for years anyway. Why this lack of interest in waking, indeed, a loathing at I had had to wake up? I’d no idea.

I readjusted my wobbly mammoth-stomached body in the £300, second-hand, decrepit, Haemorrhoid Harold-testing, sleep deterring, nauseatingly beige-coloured, not-working recliner and tried to force myself back to sleep again. But it was not working, putting me down a peg or two in the contentment stakes. Then the bowl rumbled the need for the early morning trip to the wet room and arose. so I’d no choice then. Grudgingly but hurriedly, I made my way to the porcelain.

Where I was glad that I didn’t wait any longer, for Trotsky Terence was fighting back against Constipation Konrad’s last few days in control of the movements. Phew! I’d not hit the bum on the plastic seat, and the flow started! A close call that. While in the wet room, I decided to stay up and get the done.
The hair on the neck was again not letting me cut it. It let me cut the neck a few times and the left ear, too.
Then, the mop bucket, of all things, gave me a toe-stubbing of high quality and in the 3-4/10 pain range. That surprised me, considering the cheap weak plastic it’s made from.
Dried off and into the kitchen… I’d done it again! Wot a Plonka! I’d left the hot water tap running from when I put the plate and cutlery in to soak last night! So, no hot water for a while, On the bright side, if there is one… I’d not left the plug in the sink, so no floods this time. And the plate and cutlery were very clean. Hehehe!

Now my emotions were in turmoil, but oddly, I soon got stuck in updating the Tuesday blog, and I was almost at the end of the creating process as ♫ Oh Susan ♫ chimed from the doorbell. came in, and he was in a slightly better state of health this morning. We had a good nattering session with a few laughs and Governmental cussing. During which he only yawned twice… honestly! Lovely to see him perkier.

I had a wee-wee, made a brew of Thompson’s Punjana, and set to finishing the Tuesday blog… Then realised I’d not made the Ode to Doreen Rhymes! I’d done the graphics but no odeing, Gragknangles! It took me another three hours to get them all done and eventually got them posted off, well into the afternoon, I think. Ups and downs today?

I made a start on this blog, graphics first, then onto WordPress to start editing. Went to put the kettle on again…
DOUBLE Cor blimey! One heck of a toe stubbing on the trolley wheel, and I knocked off two bottles of spring water… which landed on the other foot! One bouncing back up and hit Little Inchie! Still, it doesn’t bother me. Ahem!

I’ll find another funny cartoon to put on to cheer us up a bit… hang on. Yes, let’s have another political one. Hehehe!

I’ll get summat to eat, then, And I did! A Morrison’s brand roast vegetable bolognese, with the last (Sob!) of the podded garden peas and a baked bean pastie. Bootiful! I think Sister Jane would have liked this. Not the bean pastie, of course, but the veg bolognese.

I took the tray with the dish and cutlery into the kitchen, telling myself not to leave the tap (faucet) running this time. This took away my concentration for a second or so, and I walked into the doorframe with my shoulder. Dropped the tray; naturally, the knife cut into the middle digit, and the tray hit the big toe!
It’s truly dumbfounding; to think all the jobs I’ve done that needed multitasking, and I did them without thinking. Now two things on my mind are enough to cause all sorts of problems and injuries! Humph!
Of course, it was the fault of Dementia Doreen, again! Then after clearing up the mess and a little cursing; kicked-off. Gave me a good rattling of the shoulder joint and kept on for an hour or more. She’s never lasted that long.

Never mind. I got back in the recliner, and I was determined to stay awake to watch the Heartbeat episode. It’s amazing how one can drop off ten or twelve times in an hour. Humph! Then not be able to get to sleep at all again!

Samantha came in without ringing the buzzer, or at least it didn’t work if she did. Good job that I wasn’t taking a wee-wee or medicating Little Inchies Fungal Lesion! Even more embarrassing, I could have been doing the Diabetic exercises. Haha! Samantha sorted the medications, and she picked out her thank-you treats. Taking the waste bag with her as she departed.

I got back down in the recliner but was not interested in playing anymore whatsoever.
I decided to get up and stay up. And went to take a snap from the kitchenette window of the beautiful night sky. Which I did. Absolutely bootiful!
As I turned from the window, I saw that I had left the hot water tap (faucet) running after all! So frustrating, annoying, and ignominious, I felt!

I got on the computer to update this blog. It was soon gone midnight; What happened to the day? Did I have another memory-Blank period? Ah well, I’ll press on with the blogging and get it finished and posted soon as I can,
TTFN each!

Inchcock Today: Wed-Thur 30-31st March 2022

Wednesday 30th March 2022

Morning Thoughts Ode

A difficult day to navigate…
Thoughts, intentions I miscalibrate,
Mind-freezers and blanks dominate!
Confusion, memory-blanks delay…
Getting things done in a logical way…
Clear thinking, I was refused…
All day long, I felt I was reclused…
Not to mention mightily confused!

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05:30hrs: I stirred back into the sad world of a lonely consciousness. Dispirited, low, not fully-with-it. My thoughts were vague, ambiguous even to me, and I thought them! Hehehe! This weird feeling of solitariness must have come for a reason? Mayhaps I’d had a dream of some sort?

Hello, Mr Nice from above has started early this morning. I reckon it is something heavy he’s making today. I hope he doesn’t hurt himself too much. Ahem! Cause the clunks and thuds were louder, a lot of drilling noises followed along with the usual tap-tapping and odd thunderclap clunk, here and there later on.

Hahahahahahaha!

Carer Richard arrived. While he was doing my medications, the intercom burst forth and flashed. Thanks, Dementia Doreen! It was a J Sainsbury’s order that I thought was coming on Thursday? Hmm?

No bread was delivered, but as they pointed out, I requested no substitute. Like last time, they’d sent me potato pancakes in place of bread?

Two short date products as described on the right. The fishcakes were with use by today’s date! The salad was by tomorrow. As they say in their advert: Sainsbury’s: Helping everyone Eat better?

However, they did express that they hope I’ll be completely happy with my order, and I can return anything I’m not happy with, and I’ll get a refund within five working days! And Sainsbury’s is owned by Royalty, you know. It shows, dunnit?

Carer Richard took the boxes through into the kitchen, and I got them stored away. He also checked the dates on the stuff in the fridge for me. Finding a few items out of date, Ahem!

Richard departed, leaving a confused Inchcock, Perplexed;  ① as to how he thought they coming tomorrow, not today? ② How they could send something with a sell-by date of the same day? ③ The cream cakes were mashed up together in the box! ④ And the daffodils (Jenny and Francis treats) had petals knocked off of them! ⑤ And why had Little Inchies fungal lesion suddenly started spouting blood?

Med Hydr Off to the wet room and dug out the new ointment. This took a lot longer than expected. Cleaning things up and applying the cream was its usual painful experience. And by the time I’d finished, got new PPs on and dressed, Dizzy Dennis had joined me, and my vision was blurred for some reason?

So, I did the blood pressure to see if anything was out of sync. Well, the blood pressure was acceptable. The Pulse was a smidge high, but only a tiny bit so. The body temperature was lowish, 35°c is my target, and it was 33.7°c. Again, it was so low as to cause concern. I thought about it; what had caused this funny spell? Then gave up.

I spent hours and hours blogging, almost automatically, and now have many memory blanks. Reading my scribbled remember-it notes on the pad was impossible for hours, and I did start to get a little worried then.

I found myself sitting on the £300, c1968, second-hand, charity shop-bought, eyesorely-horrendously grungy coloured, haemorrhoid-testing, unfit-for-use, not working recliner, with the TV on? No idea? What happened during the intervening hours…

Initially, I panicked a bit, and got up, grabbed Metal Micky, and started having a search around Sherlockian style. Worried that any heat, taps (faucets), stove hobs or oven had been left on.

After a limp around, I found everything as it should be! There were no running taps, lights or heaters left on, windows closed, the cooker was cold all over to the touch, and the fridge-freezer doors shut. Plus, I was feeling a lot better in myself physically. Dizzy Dennis had departed, and my vision seemed to be normal again??? As normal as one can expect, with having cataracts, glaucoma and saccades. Even the kettles were both stone cold… that must be a first for me. I almost felt contended.

I was still mystified about where the hours had gone and what I had been doing… sleeping? Little Inchie was checked; all well, no bleeding now.

I felt hunger pangs brewing up. So off to the kitchenette and started on a had a cooking session. Noticing the beautiful evening, I got the Canon and took to picture of the blue hue of the evening.

It was turning dark quickly tonight. Ten minutes after taking the first shot, I took this second picture of the same scene.

Then I got the meal onto the plate and put the used oven tray and saucepan in the sink to soak while I ate the dinner…

I turned to put the saucepan on the draining board and gave myself one hell of toe-stubbing on the wheel of the server trolley! My language was a smidgeon blue and self derogatory in nature!

Then I missed the edge of the draining board with the saucepan, which now has a deep custom-designed dent it, as it fell off and landed right on the recently stubbed toe!

But I curbed my histrionics as the evening carer arrived. The Carer soon sorted the medications out in double time, I thanked her, and I got back and settled with the meal tray on my knee dining, and turned on the TV to watch the end of a ‘Heartbeat’ episode… regretfully, I managed neither of the planned activities!

Well, there was a single item on the J Sainsbury delivered fodder that was edible, really… Sorry, but it’s true! The cheese curls were really rock-hard outside and soft inside. The potatoes cakes had not an ounce of ant flavour or taste? The cobs were like cardboard. The fresh peas were bitter! A flavour Rating of 1/10! That was for the tasty lemon and lime cheesecake. Note To Self: Stop buying cheese curls, potato cakes, cobs, and fresh peas from J Sainsbury’s! The waste bin for 95% of that meal.

From then on, there is no sound memory of what happened. I think I slipped into sleep at about 22:00hrs and slept through until 05:40hrs… at least that’s when I woke up.


Thursday 31st March 2022

Morning Thoughts Ode

A day that I anticipate,
There will be love & hate…
But neither of them will be very great…
I’ll try to not let today aggravate,
Good and evil will alternate,
Good fortune, I’ll not wait…
Thought-Storms to circumnavigate,
Worries and fears to collate…
Naturally, I’ll remain celibate,
Sanity, hopes, health to connotate…
Daily tasks I’ll try to coordinate,
As soon as I find the time and date…
Confusion’s just an everyday trait,
Mind-blanks, make me feel desperate,
Dizzy spells, none for a while, but I await…
Saccades, Cataracts Glaucoma, eyes dilate…
My vision and hearing began to absquatulate!
At least I haven’t started to hallucinate…
Note to self: Just give it time, mate…

05:40hrs: I blinked myself awake and waited for the eyesight to clear. And realised how good I felt this morning. Well, as good as I could manage. The brain fogginess and dizzies had departed! Yee-Ha! I’d had a decent kip for once and was with it more today. How long for, I didn’t want to go into!

I decided to make use of this moment, and I rose, caught my balance, and had a hobble with Metal Micky to the wet room to get the ablutions done. I managed to get a few nicks and cuts shaving in my over-confidence, nothing serious.

The toe from last night’s stubbing and falling saucepan landing on it had left me with a new limping style. Hahaha! Yet I still gave myself a toe-stubbing on the same digit as I left the wet room, against the doorframe edge. Humph! But it was not a bad one. I got dressed, put the kettle on, and had to go back to the wet room to visit and utilise the Porcelain Throne.

CW02 No doubt about it, Constipation Conrad was in full charge of the operation this morning! It was a long time before any activity started, and when it did, an awfully long and painful input from me was needed to literally force things out! So, I had a go at the crosswording, the old book.

I was running out of time to get things done on this blog, so something had to curtail things of detail. Everything takes so much longer, ever-increasingly longer, to do with the computer. Problems with the computer, Liberty-Global Virgin Media internet going down so often, the eyes and Neuropathy Pete… now the mind-blanks making it so difficult to get anything done. And always missing errors and mistakes… Sorry.

Went to make a brew of Glengettie tea in the kitchen.

Took this photo and added the ghost skull in the window for a bit of fun later. Hahaha!

Oh, my Jimminee, what a high SYS and low Pulse I’ve got this morning. Not that I’m surprised, I sort of expected it.

But at least the body temperature was a little higher this morning, close to its official target of 35°c for once.

I heard the wind blowing outside, which goes to show how strong it must have been for me to hear it.

I had a peep out of the balcony window, and blooming heck, it was snowing. Fine thin flakes, but large ones.

I took another photo to the right, of the end car park.

Rather comforting to see red-van-man back parked on the yellow no-parking chevrons.

Took a photo (All of these were taken through the glass... too cold to stick my head outside and get the flat filled with snowflakes). Hahaha! Of the front car park on Chestnut Walk.

Snowflake was my nickname in the Meadows boxing club. I’m not sure why I bothered mentioning that?

Then a shot that showed nothing through the left-hand window in the balcony.

I went back to the computer, finished the Snippets blog, and posted it to WordPress. It was a challenging, mistake-ridden, sanity-testing affair as  I got angrier with myself for my many stupid mistakes,

The snowing stopped, leaving a thin coating that gave the bottom field an eerie look, especially for April! (Nearly) Haha!

I got the daffodils and took them first to Francis. What a farce it was as well. Got to the elevators and had a while to wait to get one. Down to the eighth floor, and as the door opened, Francis was waiting to get in, to go out. I gave her the bag with flowers and some nibbles and got out to allow Francis and a bloke to get it, so they would not be delayed and possibly miss the bus. I waited for the next lift to go back up to the ninth floor and Jenny’s.

Three times the cage arrived, but always on the way down. It would have been quicker to have gone down and come back up again. Haha! Dropped off the bag at Jenny and Franks, left some drinkies with them for Frank and Doris. ♥

Back to the flat, and the weather looked slightly different when I got in. The wind seemed to have dropped, and the snow had melted away into the earth and ether.

I opened the window and am sure I could smell petrichor as if it had been raining?

I made an order for Iceland for the following Monday. I made sure I kept to the minimum order – but of course, knowing Iceland, there will be substitutes and out-of-stock items every week. Which nay make the order under the minimum, and cost me delivery charges.

After an hour or so of computing, well, I say computing? It was more like making errors, forgetting details, getting things wrong, hitting the wrong buttons, and getting even more wee’d off! The weather changed again.

Made a start on this blog at long last. I got carried away on WordHippo, updating my words to use list… Suddenly, my mind was full of Cognitive biases and guilt. Why?

: I have what I can only call a mind-blank. After hours of sorting out the new list, I closed the notepad without saving it, and I lost the lot! I’ll not repeat my thoughts on this.

Humph! I went to make another brew. I took another wee-wee… they have been persistent again today, even though I’ve cut down on my Glengettie drinking a lot today. No, honestly!

The skies had altered again and were blue with almost white small puffer clouds.

Bootiful sky! It’s been a changeable day.

Waiting for the kettle to boil, I took a clearer photo of the Chestnut Way end car park and red-van-mans parking. Well, he’s pretty consistent; you have to give him credit!

He’s been consistent today; although I’m worried about him now, he’s gone all quiet? Maybe he’s gone to an AA meeting? Or a Masonsonic Lodge meeting? Mafia get together? Or he is having a chat with Putin?

Well, I found I’d had three official-looking letters had been delivered. These make me nervous, you know. They always require me to make phone calls without considering my deafness or Doreen’s Dementia. Nottingham City Homes, Pegasus Police and Queens Medical Centre Eye clinic – Re Cataracts assessment! Two appointments for 3rd May! Now I’ll have to find out where and how to get there. But I was generally cheered by the news.

The Nottingham City Homes was about the rent payments.

I took a half-decent shot from the kitchen window. Showing the further change in the weather… it looked so pretty now.

Being perked up a bit with the news from the hospital seemed to inspire my taste buds. So I decided, after yesterday’s pathetic meal, to make sure this would be a good one! And it was, too!

The extra crispy chips were marvellous, sprinkled with spirit vinegar and Worcester sauce. But, nothing would make the last of the fresh garden peas taste any good, but I did add a bit of sugar while cooking them – it didn’t so much. The tomatoes went down okay. Each round of the cheapo beef slices was eaten within a portion of milk roll bread. I was so keen on consuming the unostentatious meal I forgot to photograph it. So I did part-way through eating it. Oh, I did enjoy it! Flavour Rating: 8/10; I’d have given it a higher score, but for the crap tasting Kenyan peas.

Doing the washing up, I was belching with delight. Haha!

I got the camera and took these photographicalisations of the eerie but fantastic night’s view.

Made up a bottle of spring water, added a drop of orange cordial to it, and whistled to myself; as I checked on the taps (faucets), I was tickled with the actioning of help with the cataracts. Albeit not for a few weeks yet. Checked the electrics and wet room. Then, I meandered almost casually with Metal-Mickey, to the £300, second-hand, c1968, charity shop-bought, eyesorely-horrendously grungy coloured, haemorrhoid-testing, easily-falloutable, unfit-for-use, not working, recliner. My intentions were to get in with Sweet Morpheus as soon as possible…

I should have known better. The Thought-Storms erupted. They gorgonised my tired brain, tormented, teased and put me in an uneasy state of mind. I had no idea when they relaxed their onslaught, but it was gone 23:00hrs cause I put the TV on then, hoping it would help me drift off… Humph!

Have a great day, Folks!

Inchcock: Sunday 27th February 2022

Inchcocks Morning Ode…

There are some things of interest, some nostalgic…
I wish to admit to and share on this Samstag,
Like my being an insomniac…
But not a kleptomaniac…
My ailments ensure I move about, looking like a maniac!
My stomach doesn’t look like a sixpack…
The flesh wobbles, flails about, and bounces back…
This is not my only physical drawback…
Cateracted eyes are going; I can just see a haystack!
The hearing is fading, teeth covered in plaque…
Medical bother, I can’t get to see the quack,
My hobbling pace is down to that of a lollygag!
When Jillie came yesterday, she brought me a snack…
Did I mention it? To me, she’s an aphrodisiac! 💘

Inchcock: Sunday 27th February 2022

Gobsmacking! I woke up at 06:40hrs, having had an uninterrupted straight six hours of kip! At last! I think the Hemp capsules, just one at night, must be working! We’ll see!

The fight to free my substantially flabbier and grossly larger-stomached body from the £300, second-hand bought, c1968, nauseously beige-coloured, not-working, rusty, rickety, difficile, crumb-covered tatty recliner; went so smoothly! No Dizzy Dennis’s antics, Cartilage Cathy was hardly any hassle at all, and no toe-stubbing. Arthur Itis, Duodenal Donald, Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley, were all calm!!! I realised this may be bluff from the body, so I delayed going into a Smug-Mode!

As I was hobbling into the kitchen and working out how long I’d been asleep, I cracked the right shoulder against the door frame! The glasses came off, I dropped the empty bottle I was going to refill! Of course, I took in all in good spirits. After respectaclising myself and cleaning up the mess, and laughed away as I got into the kitchenette. Ahem!

I realised it was Sunday (I usually work these things out within an hour or so of waking up, you know). So, I got all the food and implements needed for Prepping Josie’s chilli stew. Doing pork for her today, for a change. Chopped the veg and added it to the saucepan with the seasonings.

As I rinsed out the lemon washing up liquid bottle before putting it in the waste bag, the bubbles went everywhere, including up in the air! Got back and reran the tap, but it was no good; the suds had died a death. Shame! Like lightning… well, I hobbled as fast as I could and got the Canon to photograph this min-phenomenon.

I got on the computer to finish off yesterday’s blog. The door chime chimed, and I thought it might be the Amazon man with the belated bleach, but it wasn’t.

It was the nippy, perky, Cheeky Charley Carer. Who told me off for spelling her name wrong. She got the medications sorted out, and we had a little nattering session. During which she took a selfie with the Canon, of both of us! Chose her choice of treats (Back of photo), and off she went, taking the waste bags with her. ♥ You just can’t help liking her!

Ten minutes later, ♫Oh Susana ♫ chimed again. It was the food from J Sainsbury’s. The chap took the bags through to the kitchen for me; that was a nice gesture. As he left, he mentioned that I did not look too good. Oh, I felt okay? The first thing I did was get the potatoes in a cool fark place. See the potatoes above? Sainsbury’s new slogan, Helping everyone eat better, Does not ring true, does it! They also had only one day’s life on Strawberrys and two on the yellow tomatoes. One substitute and two unavailable items;  Which really helps the new slogan get across, dunnit? ‘Sainsbury’s, Helping everyone eat better‘ Crap!

The food cupboard had room left in them both? And the fridge was looking most positively sparse! Ring-pulls on the peas and chilli were no longer on the cans.

No fresh garden peas are available, along with lemon cheesecakes. And the baked cheese curls were loose in the box, with no wrapping!

I wonder which overpaid dimwit came up with this Catchphrase-Motto’? Hogwash! Proof of J Sainsbury’s commitment to their new logo.

Got on with updating the Saturday blog via what bits I could remember and the scrawl on the notepad. I kept checking on the cooking meal for Josie, in between wee-weeing and blog working.

The intercom buzzed, and I thought the Amazon bleach had arrived, even though their Email said it would be coming twixt 15:00>18:00hrs. But I could see no one on the lobby camera? Mmm?

Eventually, I got the blog almost finished, then realised the time, and had to get the Josie-meal readied and served. So, I did! I’d made far too much. So I put another serving in the grey-lidded pot, so she can have another nibble later on. I have to say, this pork one did taste good when I tried a spoonful! Added the extra tidbits; The G&T, Yorkie bar, Cadbury’s chocolate mini rolls, cheese discs, a pot of Devon custard, and two tiny pots of pineapple jelly desserts. Then in a bid to get it to her before it lost its heat, I plodded out into the lobby and rang her bell. She soon answered the door, making her usual perusal of the meal, asking what is it this week then?

I told her I’d put pork instead of beef in the Chilli-stew this time. And again, she told me I’d have her looking like Betty Bunter. Can anyone remember the Betty Bunter character? I’m sure she was in a comic in the ’50s. The comic title was June! The lads had Billy Bunter and the gals Betty Bunter… not sure I can remember the comic’s name. I’ll have a look on the web for Betty Bunter later. Which I did, here she is! It was Bessie Bunter!

I got back to the flat and got all the washing up done. Then posted the blog off. Visited Facebook, WordPress Reader, WP Comments… all between taking wee-wees, of course. Tsk!

16:40hrs: The Amazon box of bleach arrived. As the deliveryman plonked it on the floor through the door – I thought… this is poor! I immediately had a bit of a panic-station, DEFCON-two warning come over me! I didn’t like the idea of the label being on the side of the box. Got it into the kitchenette and used the sharp knife to carefully open it. It was apparent that every bottle had leaked! Good job; it was crap bleach; it had only worked its way through the inner box. I had a bit of a kerfuffle as I got the bottles from the decaying box and into the sink. Where I checked each one and cleaned it with paper towels.

Having not long gotten over J Sainsbury’s insulting treatment, now it was Amazon’s turn to insult me. Some of the bottles weighed far less than the others; obviously, they had spewed out more bleach. Grumph!

I got on with cleaning and drying them, putting each one in the rectangular bowl, in case they leaked again later; at least the escaping bleach should be contained to some degree… I hope!

Francis

I nipped the Strawberries down to Francis’ apartment. I almost forgot about taking them for her this week. Slipped her a cheese twist pastry as well. I hope she likes the cheese twists… ♫ Come on let’s twist again, Like we did last summer, come on… ♫

Been such a busy day for me in some ways. Good job, I remembered, cause they were delivered with one-day shelf-life left on them by J Sainsbury’s! Oh yes… How does it go? ‘Sainsbury’s, Helping everyone eat better.’

Made a long-awaited start on this blog, and an hour or so later, the tune of ♫ Oh, Susana ♫ chirped up. I was so glad that Carer Julie came to see to tend to me.

Julie kindly listened to me moaning about the Sainsbury’s and Amazon deliveries. She even checked the bottles to see they were safe. She really is an Angel to me. America’s loss, and aged decrepit Nottinghamians gain. 💗

The Sherwood sunset was not as dramatic as it has been these last few nights, but still a wonderful Mother nature sight to see.

The blogging was slow-going yet again. I surrendered to the eyelids’ demands and gave up. I’ll continue in the morning. Hopefully, Hahaha!

Idiotic-Inchcy – Saturday 13th March 2021 Diary

♥ The Next TFZer President Speaks! ♥

INCHCOCK TODAY

Saturday 13th March 2021

Croatian: Subota, 13 Ožujka 2021

00:00hrs: Considering the truly low and depressed mood I found myself in last night, as I stirred into semi-life, I was suddenly aware that the gloom and doom tormenting my brain was gone, disappeared, no longer there! I found this rather flummoxing.

I was baffled as to why? Nothing had changed from yesterday. Had I been dreaming, and that may have had some effect in cheering me up? Was it the bang on the head when I took my tumble that brought it on in the first place? Hello, I’d better get up; I don’t want to encourage any Thought Storms! I need a wee-wee anyway.

I freed my overweight, flobby-stomached body from the £300, second-hand, c1968 recliner with absolute ease – until I got the weight on the knees! Argh! Cathy Cartilage on the right knee, and Arthur Itis on the left one, were both so painful and in a bad mood with me this morning. The few hurtful paces to the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee Bucket) indicated that this will be a less-than-easy hobbling about Saturday.

I fumbled about to get Little Inchie out and realised as I did so, the NWWB was over half full? Why does this happen so often? I must have made many trips to release this much wee-wee overnight? Yet I cannot recall getting up at all to do so? The pain I must have got from Arthur and Cathy getting out of the recliner so often, I’d have thought I would have been made me aware of what I was doing? My mind was soon cleared of this question, as the embarrassment of a somewhat significant amount of PMD (Pre-Micturition-Dribbling) escaped into the half down PPs. By bottom-lip protruded, and after finishing, I took the bucket to the wet room for emptying and sanitising and got a clean-up and got a new pair of PPs on.

It’s time and incidents like this that really bring it home to one; the body is doing its own thing, the brain’s logicality loses its way, the memory is fading fast and now avoiding most of its retention powers. The bones, joints, and ticker etc., are crumbling without mercy. Still, yer doesn’t like to complain, does yer!

I got the kettle on to make a brew of Thompsons Punjana, and it sounded like someone had just turned the volume up on the ‘World-Wide-Hum’; Gawd, it was loud! And the heaters were not working again? Worra, life! But I imagine that there are many people in the complex in this position, not that it cures anything, but, at least, I am still aware of my senility is en route. I worry for the future, though. Blooming cold in here again! Weekend, of course, so no one to help me out with getting the heaters also going correctly.

Had another wee-wee of the IRPT (Indefatigably-Relentless-Painful-Trickling) mode.

I took the morning medications, then got the Health Checks done. The temperature was alright this morning; it seems to be getting steadier now. Of course, I shouldn’t have said that; it was silly of me! 36.7°c – 98.06°f. It was in the green, so it should be acceptable.

The Boot’s sphygmomanometer readings were decent, methinks. SYS 150, DIA 71, and the Pulse was at 84 bpm. As I was taking this, a headache came on suddenly, sharp to the right side of the head – then a minute later, it was gone?

Microsoft Office allowed me access to Excel to update the Health Checks listing figures.

Do you see that? Three, in-the-green temperatures on the trot there! Much better than earlier in the week.

I had another wee-wee, surprisingly, of the WUNT (Weak-Unwilling-Negligible-Trickling) style. Then made a start on the updating of the Friday Diary. Sorted the photographs out first, then got the scripting done. The ailments of concern were just two; Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters letting me down a few tines, and of course the SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley) in support, but a lot less bothersome than she was yesterday. I perseverated and got it finished but had to have four wee-wees during the three hours of writing and correcting—all of the SPL (Steady-Persistent-Lengthy). I’m getting variety today, at least. Haha!

As I put the kettle on in the cold, shiver-giving kitchen (Heater still not working), I had to nip off to the wet room to utilise the Porcelain Throne. What going on here! Constipation Konrad seems to be fighting back? Heck of a job to get things moving, and it was gooey yet solid? The toilet rolls will have to be ordered today; if I can get a slot for an A.M. delivery. A good clean up, and pleasingly, the evacuated produce was cleared with just two flushes!

I had a wash-up and had another wee-wee, this time of the PSS (Persistent, Short, Sharp) mode. Another washing of the dandies, and back to the computer.

I Pinterested some snaps, Emailed the link, and went on Facebooking catch-up. Spent a long time on that. Two WordPress comments had come in, which I replied to. Then I visited the WordPress Reader Section. I had another wee-wee of the PSS (Persistent, Short, Sharp) mode… I think we can assume that every half-hour or so throughout the day, I needed and took a wee-wee; it’ll save me a lot of typing. Tsk! Then:

I went onto the Sainsbury site to see what slots were attainable. I got a slot for Tuesday 16th @ 8>9a.m. Do you know, I made a mistake and ordered some Fresh Cream French Horns.

Brekkers sorted out. And from here on, it is hit and misses, memory-wise, very patchy. Sorry.

Suddenly, I wasn’t feeling so good, perplexed, and tired out.

I had a weariness-attack, and I just turned off the computer and sat down on the recliner for many hours, watching some banal crap on the TV, but I couldn’t understand why. Doing nothing but grow fat by nibbling biscuits, crisps, ice-cream as well, I think?

The need for the Porcelain Throne then forced me to get up. I ached all over, was coughing and sneezing and felt under the weather, and confused. For some reason, I found out in the morning, I’d not cleaned up the wet room, Eurgh!

I actually made some more fodder! (I found this photo on the SD card). But can I remember making or eating it? No!

But I did find most of it in the bin later on in the night.

Along with this photo, taken through the balcony dividing glass? Not sure what, if anything, went on after that.

Mind you, Sunday morning, I did discover this snap on the camera-card. Also, that the fodder things were left loose in the sink bowel?

I’m sure that I sat down again, incapable of logical thought, and once more, spent hours just sat there, looking at the turned-off TV and fighting-off Thought-Storm-Thaddeus, but only half-heartedly. I think I was so down; I actually just accepted the self-criticisms, fears, worries etc., as a natural leveller, and a prevailing punishment, and part of my growing mental decrepitude.

The thought of having another banal Sunday to get through tomorrow was soul-destroying.

The resistant sleep did come eventually.

Impavid Inchy – Friday 12th March 2021 – Diary

Classy TFZer Gentlemen!

“A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists.”


INCHCOCK TODAY

Friday 12th March 2021

ITALIANO: Venerdì 12 Marzo 2021

23:25hrs: Horrible ever waking sleep last night. I was in the recliner for about five hours, though, but most of it spent waking up, thoughtless and vague-minded, and waiting to nod-off again! Grubblebleackers!

I got freed from the recliner, caught my balance quickly (Cartilage Cathy was so kind to me this morning, Yee-Ya!) By gum, it was cold in the flat. I wobbled into the kitchen and got the kettle on. Washed last night’s dishes and things and made a brew of Glengettie tea.

Then did the Health Checks. Pleased to see the SYS at 147, DIA 67 and PULSE down nicely to 83bpm. I didn’t adopt any Smug-Mode yet, mind.

I got the contactless thermometer out and was also satisfied with the resulting figure that it produced. 36.6°c – 97.88°f.

I took last night’s missed dosages of medications. (Fool!)

Got the computer on, and much to my surprise, Microsoft allowed me access to Excel and the HC logs to update. (Weich they denied me for all day yesterday – well, each time I tried, it was updating!

I’d let the tea go cold, so I made a Thompsons Punjana and then checked out the wall heaters that were not producing any heat at all! It was bloody cold in the flat, I can tell yers! Methinks I have problems with them!

I started to update the Thursday Diary. Got it finished, despite SSS Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley doing her best to have the right arm torn-off at the glenohumeral joint! Hehehe! Vicious she was, for about an hour solid. That’s never happened before. Not for that long a period. Still, she eased off later. Painfully and persistently, I completed the task, and I posted some snaps to Pinterest.

Then, sent the Diary off to WordPress, emailed the link, and went on Facebooking catch-up. I discovered it was another lovely, loveable TFZer ladies Birthday, so I made a graphic and sent it off to her. Note I’ve lost so much weight… Hehehe! ♥

Made some comments on WordPress. I visited the WP Reader section, then the call to the Porcelain Throne arrived. Off to the wet-room, I hobbled. (Not so bad actually, Cartilage Cathy is still pleased with me and being gentle too!)

What a mess! Loose, yet gooey with it, short-lived, not a lot of it evacuated, and yet the gluey semi-liquid dollop just would not go away! Several refills of the tank by hand from the sink where needed, and five or six flushes! A jolly good job I had toilet paper spares, well that’s what they were, now more will be required, judging by the whole roll needed to clean things up.  Flibblegonkackles!

Apart from so many dropsies thanks to SSS, the stand-up session was only worthy of one mention with a difference. That was after nasal cleaning, teeth cleaning, shaving, bathing, and medicating…

Getting the socks on! It was even funny at the time! I forced the right leg up a little, wedged my bum on the door corner, got the sock part way on, and lost my grip (I do a lot of that!). The cotton sock shot off, hit the back of the closet box, and plonked down into the WC water! I tried to replicate what I would have been doing and made a photo of it afterwards. Another pair of socks were utilised. The legs seem to be retaining fluid again?

The Iceland Foods delivery is due twixt 06:00 > 08:00hrs, but I’d got the ablutions sorted early enough to do the hand-washing in the kitchen sink sorted. All done, wrung, and hung above the sink on hangers. The Lily and Yang Yang scent in the Surf soap powder has a delightful smell.

I took a Canan camera photo of the morning view as I put the kettle on and made a mug of Glengettie brew.

I checked the heater in the kitchen, and it was warm now; I turned it up somewhat, as the weather forecast is so gloomy for the next 24-hours.

I took a shot of Chestnut Walk and the car park on it.

Time getting close now for the food to arrive. After it does and I get it stored away, I’ll see how supplies look and if another Sainsbury order might be a good idea, depends on what slots are available. Sometimes it’s a long wait to get one.

I did some updating on this post and then made another brew, Thompsons Punjana, this time. No time to drink it, the intercom rangeth and flashed, it was the Iceland Food delivery arriving, I pressed the entry button and awaited his arrival.

The Iceland man dropped the begs… begs? Yet another cock-up wiv me grammar, Tsk!), bags I meant, through the doorway for me. Slipped him a choice of cans of plonk, and off he trotted on his mission to feed the nation!

I took the carriers through to the kitchen and went on the internet to see if anything was short delivered or substituted.

Does yer know, there wasn’t a single substitution, and nothing short delivered… Even more surprising, there was nothing found to be short-dated either, as well, besides! Iceland outdid themselves with this delivery, a definite, very welcome first!

I was well pleased, but of course, I’d not checked for any damaged, crushed or leaking goods yet, so I resisted going into a Smug-Mode for the time being.

I set about putting the frozen stuff away first. As you can see in the photograph here on the right, it was all healthy living stuff. Well, I forgot to get the chips. Hahaha! Still a kid at heart, I am!

Next, I put away the fridge items, far better foodstuffs. Topside beef slices, pork & Pickle mini pork pies, sweet chilli chicken, chicken thighs, potato salad, egg-mayonnaise, and some strawberry and whipped cream desserts. Now I’ve put the spell checker on; the previous sentence had eight mistakes on it! Ahem! Got the other stuff in the bathroom and cupboards.

The YourArea magazine arrived, so I investigated. The lottery winner had been sentenced for his appallingly dangerous driving in which he killed a 75-year-old lady in the car he’d drifted across the road, and his BMW then crashed head-on into an oncoming Ford Fiesta.

I say sentenced; he got away with a 16-week suspended sentence and a one-year driving ban! For a £45 million lottery winner, that’s really going to bother him, innit! And the poor husband has lost his wife through Topham’s ignorance of the law and lack of concentration in driving, and I believe still in the hospital.

The now 31-year old Topham said in court: “I honestly don’t believe I thought about what I was about to do,” he said. “If I could take it back, I would, but I can’t.” (Me, me, me!) Huh! Generalfeldmarschall Friedrich Paulus said that after Stalingrad, will have to find money from his £45m for taxies? Some sodding deterrent that was! Was the jury back-handed? Just asking! I bet he the had best expensive lawyers!

At least I found some goodish news on the Covid-19 figures locally.

I decided to get some late brekkers.

I called Warden Deana on the phone, got a recorded message.

Phone the Doctors Surgery, got a recorded message.

I went to make a brew of Glengettie, and I took a tumble as I bent down to check the heat not coming from the radiator. Clouted the head on the ledge on the way down, and SSS started to play up as I struggled back up onto my feet with the help of the stove.

Made the tea and had a sit-down. I’m not sure what happened then, but I assume I fell asleep cause it was hours later when I seemed to wake-up, head pounding. I took a Codeine 60g. I didn’t feel poorly, just confused.

Did some updating of this post, but concentration was not coming to me easily. 

It’s still a bit of a blur. No notes on the pad had been added, so I assume I’d nodded off again cause I woke up in the recliner. Feeling peckish, I made a meal of sorts made up. Didn’t enjoy it much, but I’ve had worse, though. A taste rating of 6/10 was given.

I had a surreal few hours then.

In the morning, I found these photographs of the TV screen on the SD card?

Yes, it beats me why, as well!

After perusing the pictures, I assumed that I’d been watching, or falling asleep to and waking, Law & Order, Tales of the unexpected, many adverts and commercials, and possibly even a Nightmare Kitchen episode?

All I can remember for definite is that I was having difficulty in getting to sleep. I did keep nodding off, I think, but the nods only lasted a few seconds each time?

I noticed it was 19:00hrs on the clock, then went into a Thought Storming period.

A bad one, guilt, despair, mistakes, isolation, depression and fear all played a part. These went on for ages, with some emotional events from the past repeating!

I was fighting with my memory for some unknown reason, and I became self-loathing in the process.

I was pointless concerning myself with banal questions and seeking positive answers; Had I been to the Porcelain Throne today? What to do about the ear-ache? I must get a Sainsbury order done tomorrow, etc., on and on the silliness of life came at me, sadly, along with the regular guilt, shame and embarrassment. I really did feel so; what’s the word I’m looking for… lambasting and self-chastising. Oh, that’s two words!

I did eventually nod-off, and when I woke up, I wondered if my memory had been warped as I recalled how I’d felt, but the sense of doom and gloom was no longer lingering?

Isn’t life funny at times?

Inchcock, Nottingham’s lost-logicality lothario – Friday 11th December 2020

TFZers – But what are they up to?

03:00hrs: Friday 11th December 2020

Turkish: 11 Aralık 2020 Cuma

00:30hrs: I woke with a start again, and lay trying not to hear the ‘Hum’ outside, or to the new droning sound inside, we think is coming from the machinery on the rooftop in the plant-room. (That’s because it keeps stopping for five minutes or so, then kicks back in) A most annoying noise to wake up to today, two flaming humming-like susurrations, outside and inside at the same time! Globbleaurgh!

I bounded out of the luxury Snuggle-Up, £950, brand new, recliner, and nipped smartly to the £95 overnight-elderly-persons Marks & Spencer’s Chamber Pot, for a wee-wee…

Oh, alright, then… I struggled out of the grotty, £300, second-hand, c1968, unsteady, not-working, sickenly beige-coloured, haemorrhoid-testing recliner, cracked my right knee on the ottoman, felt back down in the chair and Harold’s Haemorrhoids – swore silently, gritted my teeth and got back up again. Hobbled to the OEGPB (Overnight, emergency, grey, plastic, bucket), and had a wee-wee of the PSST (Persistent, Stinging, Sharp) mode.

Seeing the medications that arrived last night, I had a nosey at them.

Being in a more stable frame of mind and more awake than when they were delivered, I think what the young lady who delivered them said, she needed to collect the medications sent earlier without any seals on them. I will ring Obergruppenfurheress and catwalk model, Warden Deana later, to ask her to ring the chemist for me, so I know what to do. I can’t believe that they want the tablets that shot out all over two room back? Then again, Matron did tell me to return them to the pharmacist? I think!

Then I realised that instead of the Dioctyl® poo-softener capsules I’d asked for, they had delivered Docusate Sodium, in a medicine form. Excellent thinking that was from Carrington Pharmacy, 343-345 Mansfield Rd, Carrington, Nottingham NG5 2DA, next to the pub, near the Lidl store, and my Doctor for prescribing medicine. That needs me, to pour out into short plastic three 5ml spoons of the medicine, three times a day! A shame they both forgot about my, Nicolas’s neurotransmitters dying, the Peripheral Neuropathy, and Peripheral Pete’s right leg dances! This is not going to work, I’ll have more medicine on the floor, my clothes, and if the involuntary Schuplatter dancing starts while I’m trying to take the medication (six times a day) the bottle is going to get dropped and smashed for sure! I can avoid any problems for a while, cause I still have some of the capsules in the pot to use for a couple or three days – then things should get interesting? Dangerous, mind! 

But credit where it is due. The Carrington Pharmacy, 343-345 Mansfield Rd, Carrington, Nottingham NG5 2DA. Tel: 0115 9605453, are nothing if not consistent in their desire to kill me off, one way or another. At least their man who dispenses the prescriptions is. They delivered the things for me, so they aren’t all bad, bless em!

Fair enough, they didn’t put the seals on of the two trays… nobodies perfect. Nemo Mortaluim Omnibus Horis Sapit!

I took the medications, then got the Health checks done. I started with the blood pressure, the SYS had was not too bad a result.

The temperature was spot on!

I must remember to ring Deana and ask for assistance with the phoning, maybe after I get the ablutions all done.

The rain began to come down as the mist slowly cleared away.

As I got on the computer, the summoning to the Porcelain Throne arrived, so off to the wet-room, I trudged. The ailments were being kind with me up to now.

I thought I might have grown hair again on my head, it took so long to get any moment started! The crossword book was utilised. I even considered giving up and trying again later… Ah, painful, very painful, but the evacuation started… It took a few minutes of effort and a few. Oooh, argh’s, but at last, things picked up the pace! Well, it looks like an easy victory in the DESB (Daily-Evacuation-Stakes-Battle) for Constipation Konrad today, over Trotsky Terence. I made sure afterwards, that the Dyoctyl® poo-softener was in the afternoon tablet box ready, in fact, the session was so bad, I put two in there.

Cleaned up, and back to the computer, to make a graphic for later use, but I got diverted (I do that a lot yer knows) when I saw the email news come in, and I had a decker at it. I copied this graph of the Nottingham areas affected.

Then it was time for the Ablutioning Session to be done.

I rang Deana; first, she said she’ll be coming to see me later on, after 11:00hrs. She had a meeting to go to first. I thanked her and made a bee-line for the wet-room/

Getting ready to do the teggies, and I noticed that the growths, blotches and even the papules that were on the left arm yesterday, had all but gone now! Amazing!

The teeth cleaning had few electric-like stabs of pain, as I caught the cracked tooth that the dentist told me were nothing to worry, as she rushed me out of her surgery a couple of weeks ago. They hated me (My high EQ could tell), cause I couldn’t get up the two flights of stairs to my regular dentist to be treated, mind you, he ain’t all that keen on me, either. Tsk!) I digress again, sorry!

The shaving, especially considering that I hadn’t shaved yesterday, went blooming great. Only one little nick and three-dropsies! Smug-Mode-Engaged! 

The showering had a couple of dodgy moments, but I’ve far worse, no I’m not complaining. They were, decent clout against the grab rail, and I hit the ankle ulcer area on the shower-chair leg.

The drying was had no, I say, No, knock-overs! (A smile developing!) As for the medicationalisationing, only poor Harolds Haemorrhoids ointmentating actually hurt. Although the ankle looked a bit battered? But I had given it a good knock when showering, so, fair do’s. It seemed to have changed colour, and the scratch marks too? No pain or soreness, mind you? All so confusing!

It worries me when things go well, it’s unnatural!

Back to the updating of this blog.

And both door chimes rang out. Oberstgruppenfuhreress and desk-top dancer, highly desirable Warden & ILC Deana appeared in the room.

She soon sorted things out for me. The Chemist said to hand the two trays back undamaged packs back to him on the next delivery. But of course, I’d started one, so only that can one can be returned. He’s not replied to my email anyway.

She patched up the fallen curtains for me in the main room and recommended the Apollo shop in Sherwood to get my curtains from. I need some for the kitchen and front room. I’ll give them a go.

Made my mind up, bacon and beans for my nosh. The milk roll bread with it methinks, but first, I must make up a template for tomorrow. Here I go… Hehehe!

Got the meal cooking things ready to start, and checked the leaflet from Nottingham City Homes. A little confusing.

I’ve got to phone them to book an upgrade in the kitchen and bathroom? I think.

The landline flashed, it was Hristina, the lovely vampire nurse, to tell me she will be calling on Monday twixt 8>10:00hrs, bless her cotton socks. I think they’ve made it earlier this week, with the INR level being so low?

Being so tired, I couldn’t appreciate the meal as I might have, but I still gave it a 7/10 for flavour and taste. The bacon was the Iceland brand ‘Seasonally Seasoned’ streaky bacon. It was almost paper-thin but tasty enough for once. The beans and vegetarian sausages were not bad. The Sainsburys pork & pickle pies were fine, not as tasty as the Iceland ones. The milk roll loaf bread and the lemon yoghourt were gorgeous! I dropped the things in the bowel to soak, had a weak wee-wee.

I was in the arms of sweet Morpheous within minutes of getting down in the recliner. The dreams began, I woke with a start, and well miffed, at not remembering much about the dreams, just a feeling that they were good? Clobblechops! I drifted back into the land of nod, determined to get back to whatever it was I was nocturnally enjoying previously – of course, I couldn’t and failed. I’m pretty good at failing, as well!

Inchcock – the Defeated! Thursday 10th December 2020

Only the better class of young hunks to apply! Haha! ♥

Thursday 10th December 2020

Croatian: Četvrtak, 10. prosinca 2020

23:45hrs: Woke, up, balance, out-of-it mode. Made tea, Health checks and wee-wee. I was intent on getting the grafting of the template creating done today, even if I got nothing else done. There was (I thought) no deliveries, nurses or owt else coming or due today.

(It was to be my most busy day for years).

Made a brew, took the photo from the kitchen window.

Got the computer on and started to do the graphics for the templates.

A mug of tea and a wee-wee.

Stuck into the template work job, and worra job it turned out to be.

To my utter amazement, the intercom rang and lit. It was the Sainsbury order I thought I’d ordered for next week?

Got stuff in the kitchen.

Sorted and put away. Gone a bit spare on the cleaners?

Back to the template graphic-creating. Spent hours on it, not getting anywhere fast, but making progress.

Stopped and sent of yesterdays blog link email. Posted it to WordPress.

Back to the template graphic-creating.

Thought I heard a knock on the door, no bells chiming.

It was the Warfarin INR, Anticoagulation test results. Not so good this time, down to 1.5, oh dear.

Back to the template graphic-creating. (Twixt weak wee-weeing)

Sister Jane rang, to tell me I’d emailed the wrong link, I’d sent Tuesdays. We had a little chinwag. I checked and sure enough another cock-up done by yours truly! Got things sorted and changed, and added a new link to the email and replied to it to send the proper link. (I think!)

I rang Jane, and she confirmed it had got through, a long nattering session took place.

Back to the template graphic-creating. (Twixt weak wee-weeing)

Made a brew and had a wee-wee.

Back to the template graphic-creating. (Twixt weak wee-weeing) This was an eight-hour stint, and I hadn’t even got the graphics finished properly, let-alone made a start to the template creating yet!

Off to the Porcelain Throne. Rock-hard, agony, bleeding, much cleaning and medicating needed.

Back to the template graphic-creating. (Twixt weak wee-weeing) Gave up, totally done-for mentally, now.

Got the nosh prepared, intending to get the Ablutions belatedly tended to afterwards. (Sheer mental fatigue, and interruptions, meant I didn’t even get the ablutions done at all – (that’ll be interesting in the morning having to shave off two-days stubble) Huh!

I got the nosh served up and anticipated a bit of a feast. Not to be, I must have been so disorientated and tired, I found it impossible to eat much of the fodder. I scraped most of it into the bin bag and added that one to another.

Got down in the chair, with the apple in my hand, and drifted almost immediately. Woke in need of a wee-wee…

The door chimes rang out, it was the sweet lady from the chemist’s. As I heaved myself out of the recliner, I dropped the apple and knocked over the bottle of spring water. Having only the jammie bottom on, I wrapped the quilt around me to save embarrassment. In the state I was in, I could not hear a word the girl was saying, but I’m sure she wanted te medications that were sent with no lid back, but I just couldn’t be sure, and I muttered something about not feeling well, I think.

She handed me the two bags of meds. I apologised for not being with-it and thanked her.

I was really in a confused state, but I needed to check on the medications.

I must ask Dean to ring the chemist for me tomorrow, to ascertain about what was actually said, and how to get the tablets back to them.

They had sent some poo-softener, but not the Dioctyl capsules, this time they despatched Docusate Sodium medicine. Taking this medicine is going to fun with Nicodemus’s neurotransmitters, Shuddering Shoulder Shirley, and a Neuropathic leg dance in the offing while doing so. At the same time, I try to measure the liquid into the spoon to take 6 doses a day! I thought the capsules were great as well!

Another weak wee-wee, and down into the recliner, confused, mentally buggered… and the Thought-Storms began… Fed-Up!

Inchcock – ‘The Blubber Man!’, Wednesday 9th December 2020

TFZers Handyman at play!

Then I hobbled home and made a brew of Glengettie, Haha!

Wednesday 9th December 2020

Swahili: Jumatano 9 Desemba 2020

23:30hrs: Slowly, very slowly, I stirred into imitation life, and with this, the Thought-Storms started to attack. Fast and furious, malicious too! Most emotions were in there somewhere at some time. Jealousy, hatred, fear, nervousness, disgust, self-contempt and an expectation, nae, certainty that something else is going to go wrong, or malfunction again today.

Several minutes later, utter confusion reigned. There were none of the usual three distractions to help me; The need for a wee-wee, the Porcelain Throne, or any of the ailments being excessively painful or bothersome. It took a while of oddly exhausting talking to myself and a lot of ignoring of the wayward thoughts, until belatedly (for me), as I was considering the easiest way to rearrange my lumberous stomach-ladened body from the recliner, the need of a wee-wee arrived. It was welcomed!

As I caught my balance, I noticed that the OEGPB (Overnight, emergency, grey, plastic, bucket), had not been utilised, so I made my way to the wet room. After yesterdays lack of wee-weeing, I expected the usual for yesterday anyway, resistant, weak, tricking mode. But, Oh, boy, no! Although short and sharp, the torrent of wee belted out like from a hose-pipe (Albeit a small hosepipe). There was no PMD (Pre or Post Micturitional Dribbling), which surprised me a tad. However, there was plenty of cleaning up to be done, from the overspill and spray! I must take care, and be aware of this, on my next visit!

I took the morning medications, taking a poo softener as well, from one of the pill-pods that the Carrington Pharmacy, 343-345 Mansfield Rd, Carrington, Nottingham NG5 2DA, next to the pub, near the Lidl store, hadn’t forgotten to put the pod covers on.

I got on with updating the Tuesday blog.

The need of another wee-wee arrived, this time I utilised the grey bucket, easier to contain the spraying from Little Inchies mini-hosepipe. This visit was just as blasting as the first, but I managed to avoid any overspray. Also, unfortunately, I saw that the urine colour had got a lot deeper, now, according to the urologist’s check chart, it was on level four. So, I refilled the spring water bottle and kept it near the computer, and took swigs of it often.

Back to the updating, and got into it, and completed it, but it cost me a couple of hours. I forgot all about the extra drinking, so had a guzzle of spring water, then got the kettle on, and made a brew of Glengettie. I told myself that I’d done a good job! Why? I’m not sure now!

A summons to the Porcelain Throne arrived. Off to the wet room, down on the raised plastic seat, and had I a wee-wee, while awaiting the evacuation to start. Little Inchie shook, well, trembled, as the jet of wee-wee exploded into the WC bowl – the spray back gave my bottom an upside-down shower of the warm liquid! Grumblecronkackers, that was uncomfortable, wince-making!

The slow to start evacuation almost made up for the mess from the wee. It was not even painful, soon over, and despite the size of the torpedo, cleared first flush! Bleeding was just a few specs, and no sore rear-end afterwards! All in all, a fine session! But of course, the midriff area, front and back, needed washing and freshening up, which it got.

I’m hoping the wee-weeing will die-down a bit. Obviously, I’d made another cock-up with sorting the medications, and must have taken another Furesomide somewhere along the line. Mind you, maybe not. With the colour going so dark, perhaps I’ve got another bladder infection? Hey-ho!

I finished the updating, and posted it off to WordPress, then went on their Reader section. Next, I emailed the link. Then went on Facebooking catch-up. Pinterested a couple of photos, and off for yet another wee-wee! Much better this time, not so vicious, and shorter, still no PMD (Pre or Post Micturitional Dribbling)!

Then I got the Health Checks completed. The sphygmomanometerisationing BP hemadynamometer, gave a much lower and healthier reading today. It was SYS 136, DIA of 74, and Pulse at 81 bpm. About time it came down, I’ve been the recent far too high ones.

Harpin Xian Di Thermometer reading was a sound 36.8°c.

I made a start on this blog, and then made a poy of Super Noodles, with added gravy and a drop of soy sauce. I’ll not bother with the soy sauce again.

The ablutions were the next job than needed tending to. I was feeling a little better, and a lot less stressed this morning. Which is a silly thing for me to say, knowing my luck! I do take chances, don’t I, pushing my luck there! Hahaha!

Blimus! Another good ablutioning session! I had no bother with the teggies, only one tiny nick shaving, and the medicating went great! No showering, because Iceland food delivery is coming early today. Only around six dropsies in total! This is the second day of having an injury-free scrubbing up session. Worrying, isn’t it?

I’d not been back on the computer for long when the intercom rang out, and the delivery man was soon up at the door with the bags. I slipped him a can and thanked him. Then took the carriers through to the kitchen… and, there were only three of them! At first, I thought; Hello, have I been done again? There’s not much there for £44? Then remembered I’d bought two bottles of wine, for Christmas pressies, ah, fair enuf!

I got them stuff sorted out, and split the black grapes with Jenny, fat too many for me on my own, still, she does like than, so may not tell me off to much for sharing. Put some things dl=elivered that can be used for her charity, some wine for Doris for Christmas and bits. The Christmas plonk for Deana had arrived as well. I got the things in a bag for each of the ladies and stacked it with the waste bags on the three-wheeler. I regret not photographing it now. It looked funny with so much stuff stacked on it.

I set off and dropped the first bag of at Jenny’s flat, had a distance natter for a minute or so. Oh, how I miss the chinwags with this isolating! I got the lift down to the ground floor, the workers were busy in the lobby.

Out to the waste bin, the caretakers were there, Rob took the bags off of me, and I continued on to the ILC (Independent Living Coordinators) Interrogation Office, in Windwood Court.

I turned to look back and tool a snap of Woodthorpe Court and the end of Chestnut Way.

Then pressed on and got to Winwood Court, Tenant Christine was chatting to ILC, Obergruppenfürheress Deana, so I had a nosey around the lobby area perusing the notices.

I was taking a picture of their Christmas tree when Reichs Inspekteuress Julie ILC returned to the holding-cell. So, managed a few seconds natter and laugh there! Which suited me down to the ground.

Had a wee gossip with Deana and Julie, and explained about the tablet-pods cock-up. Deana. Handed the Christmas treats over, and after the cheerios were completed, I made my way outside and hobbled back to the mysteries of Woodthorpe Court. With its phantoms, kelpies, spectres, poltergeist, spirits, manifestations, zombies, daemons, cacodemons, rakshasas, hellions, extraterrestrials, hobgoblins, apparitions, elfins, pishogues, apparitions, and gremlins awaiting my return.

Luckily, I’d remembered to take the swipe-fob with me, so I could get into the decorative, pleasant, picturesque, ground floor lobby of the apartments. It’s not pretty. But it’s home! Haha!

The workmen had disappeared, off on their lunch break I assume.

A notice was up tp inform us that the laundry room will be closed next Tuesday, from 08:00hrs > 16:00hrs. They must be planning to do some modernisation work in there?

I got up to the flat, made a brew, and started to update this post.

Some drilling was taking place above, but it was short-lived?

I phoned Jenny, on my new Nokia 8.3 5G, with a 171.9 x 78.56 x 8.99mm, 220g, side fingerprint scanner and Google Assistant button. Ahem! To advise her of the laundry closure next Tuesday.

Then got carried away, adding favourite words to use for the blog. The file with these on and thousands of others were lost when the Notepad file mysteriously disappeared last week. Cragnangles!

The confusing wee-wees have kept coming, but getting slowly further apart, and now a lot less urgent and powerful. I knew you’d want to know that. Har-Har!

My thoughts turned to fodder, and off I went vacillating, in my usual faltering fashion over what to make for a nosh.

Well, oh, my! This turned out a decent meal. Garden peas, fries, tomatoes, pork & pickle mini-pies, red grapes, and two of the Jenny donated pickled eggs. No bread, and no tea.

The limoncello was too sweet for me, but the lemon yoghourt was fine. A decent 7.5/10, all gobbled up (apart from the limoncello).

I think the thought-Storms must have worn themselves out earlier, cause they did not bother me as I got down into the £300, second-hand, c1968, cringingly-beige-coloured, not-working, rickety, incommodious, grotty recliner, in search of Sweet Morpheus.

I was soon in the land of nod.

I was soon out of the land of nod three hours later. Sickeningly, wide awake!

Inchcockski: A Moiling, Morpheusless Monday 7th December 2020

TFZers? What’s going in here, then? Hehe! ♥

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Monday 7th December 2020

Latin: 7 Decembris Lunae MMXX

00:10hrs: I sort of burst into life with a bit of a jump and jounce! I remained where I was (which was partially hanging out of the c1968 recliner, with my bum hanging over the cushion!), and pondered on a few things: Have I had another stroke? How did I get into this position? How do I get out of it? What day is it? Why have I got crumbs in the folds of my stomach again? That sort of thing, like… Then as the brain slowly engaged gear, a semi-panic grabbed me – What did wake me up? Was an alarm sounding, did the cooker or fridge blow-up? I lurched precariously, struggling to get up on my feet safely.

Once up, and holding the arm of the recliner for a few moments, worrying about what the expergefactor was, which had woken with such alarm? I caught my balance, and had a hobble around in my Sherlock Holmesian mode, to find the culprit that stirred me back to life so abruptly. The kitchen was perused, and nothing found that could have been the cause of any noise. (A deal of guilt though, at the state of the room, Tsk), so I cleaned up a bit and freshened the wee-wee bucket. I had to have another wee-wee as I investigated the wet room, all in order there. The hallway revealed nothing suspicious either.

I then needed to visit the wet room Porcelain Throne. Fearing the worst pain-wise after yesterdays, long, drawn-out agonistic affair on the loo. To my surprise and joy, things went much easier and far less hurtfully! Oh, Yes! I’d say a draw in the PTDDS (Porcelain Throne Daily Domination Stakes), but so messy! The tank had to be filled and flushed twice to clear thing away.

Well, defeated in my search for what had woken me up, I got on with the Health Checks.

The Sphygmomanometer SYS reading was well down, at last!

The Harpin Xian Di Thermometer was at 36.6°c. Another decent figure.

Then I went to get the medications, and it all the fiasco of sorting them out yesterday, due to Carrington Pharmacy, next to the pub and Lidl store at 343-345 Mansfield Rd, Carrington, Nottingham NG5 2DA. Tel: 0115 9605453, failing to put any seals on top of two of the weekly dose-pots, flooded-back to me! Crumbleckskins! It bothered me that I could not identify the differences between the Fuesomide, Beta-Blockers and the Codeine 60g, and just hoped and prayed I’d got them right. I took the medications for last night and got this morning’s out to be near the computer to remind me to take them later on. Again, hoping for the best! I took them with some spring water.

But I didn’t let it get the memory of, or risks I have to take thanks to Carrington Pharmacy, next to the pub and Lidl store at 343-345 Mansfield Rd, Carrington, Nottingham NG5 2DA. Tel: 0115 9605453, get to me, start spitting, silently cursing or gritting my teeth, at all.

I got the computer booted up, and went to get another glass of water, and… Grobblegrindingness! I’d left the hot water tap running! At least the plug wasn’t in the sink, so no liquid spillage all over the floor. But, of course, this means no hot water for the ablutions now! Gruffungrobblings!

Still, no worry, these things can’t be helped.

I took a photo out of the unliked, can’t get at clean, light & view-blocking kitchen window. What a farce that was, the flipping fog even masked the street lights. It soon cleared, though! Then I got a similar area shot from Sunday, that produced the rather decent picture of the same area, below. Got the Glengettie brewed and back to the computer.

Not a lot of updating to do on the Sunday blog. As I was up late, thanks to having sort out the Carrington Pharmacy, next to the pub and Lidl store at 343-345 Mansfield Rd, Carrington, Nottingham NG5 2DA, cock-up with the prescription pill-pods medications.

Still, it can’t be helped. I got the diary posted off to WordPress, and sent the Email link. Went on the WordPress Reader, and got caught-up on Facebooking.

I decided to see what slots I can get on Sainsbury’s delivery. Got one for Thursday 10th December, 07:00>08:00hrs. I kept it down to the minimum I needed, although I ordered some wine for Christmas pressies, but, how I can get it to the person, I don’t know. Still, it’ll do later, maybe. Perhaps.

Not my feet – but a warning of what can come!

I kept getting stings from whatever it is under the foot. Well, I can now name it: Cyber-Friend, Lynton has informed me they care called ‘Molluscum Contagiosum’. Another ailment to add to my list. I could call them warts, but that doesn’t sound impressive, does it? Hehehe! The ones on the legs, look like Atropic Dermitisus! Fancy waiting all these years to find that out, you’d have thought the various consultants and doctors over the years would have mentioned it? Giggle! I’m, still much better off, Molluscum Contagiosum-wise than this poor devil in the photo. Try saying that when you’ve had a few, Haha! 

Off to get the ablutions done. Stripping off, I observed that the ankle ulcer, was clearing up and a lot less inflamed this morning, still irritatingly itchy, but that’s name bother, to such a magnificently brave, heroic, staunch chap like wot I am. Ahem! The knees cartilage problem is more evident. T’was a good session again, only a stand-up job, mind you. I did not want to spend to much time in there, with the precious Vampire nurse Hristina arriving nice and early to take my blood. The teeth cleaning was done carefully, to avoid any bother with the cracked tooth, the one the dentist told me over a week than was nothing to worry about and is giving me some stick???

Why do I always get treated like this? The Hitlerish Urologist, the chemist’s pharmaceutical man with murderous (towards me) intentions, the Optician who fits me out with new glasses that the lens falls out of them a week later, and the specs fall off of my nose, and Paramedic who takes me to the wrong hospital? It’s been a learning curve this year so far!

I’m waffling again, sorry about that!

The shaving was not so good today, only one cut, but the dropsies, well! They nearly gave me backache, picking up the dropped items. At least ten times, shaving cream, razors, after-shave bottle etc. Tsk! Humph! The stand-up wash went betterer, only the one dropsy. Medicationalisationing and deodorising were easier than they usually are. Well, apart of the application of the Daktacort cream to Little Inches fungal lesion, that produced a few Oohs, curses, argh’s and much wincing.

I got dressed, cleaned the wet room a bit, and left to make up a couple of small waste bags, and added them to the box on the trolley-guide.

I made a brew of Thompsons Punjana and back to the computerisationing.

The doorbells chimed out Dusty’s tune. Seconds later, the beautiful, desirous Vampire nurse Hristina entered the room. Stressed a little she was. The gal always talks too quickly for me to understand her when she’s tensed-up, I’ve noticed that. As she took the blood, I told her of the farce with the medications. She soon, sadly, had to rush off again. Bless her cotton socks! ♥

The landline burst forth and flashed.  It was Jenny, telling me the pickled eggs had arrived, and wanted to know if I had room in the freezer for the fish and meatballs she was keeping for in her kitchen for me. She’s like that, so kind. I said I had and thanked her. Minutes later, Jen arrived at the door with a jar of pickled eggs for me, and the fish and balls. She rushed back as I thanked her, she looked very busy, as she would be if the food order had just arrived. Thanks again, Jen!♥

I rang the number for Nottingham Care, wanting to ask them if Matron Julie could contact me at her leisure. I got a recorded message that I could not hear. Over the next hour or so, I tried with the same result. I made another brew, Glengettie this time, to replace the earlier mug of tea that had gone cold.

I tried a 4th time to ring and listened as hard as I could to the message for a long time, then some music came on the line, and I got through to top a kind lady. Stuttering Stephanie started, and she the lady was patient with me. I explained about the medications, pointing out that it will not be a problem for a week, so no rush. (I realised later that it was two weeks, Tsk!) The lady tried to ring Matron Julie, but no luck. She will send a text message to her for me. I thanked her, muchly ♥. I’m hoping that Julie will be able to identify the three tablets and work out which were lost for me. A bit of a job to do, but it’s beyond my eyesight, hand coordination and concentration. Poor thing, Hehe! 

Having not had any brekkers, I started to look into making the meal of the day. I got the oven turned on and heating – because whatever I decide to have fodder-wise will have chips with them. Funny how one gets these cravings?

I called Jenny to ask if she wanted me to add anything to the Iceland order for her tomorrow. Doris answered Jen had nipped out. Lovely to talk to Doris, mind.

I continued with the flog updating for an hour or so. I think that I am, no, I know I’m struggling more with the typing. Thank heavens that Grammarly has introduced an auto-correct option, at least I should not miss so many mistakes I’m making, now.

 The oven should be hot enough now, so I poddled to the kitchen, to think about what to have. After a while vacillating, I opted to make chips, fish strips, garden peas and maybe tomatoes. The world is my oyster…

Blimey, the drilling just started, it sounded as if it is coming from in the flat! Didn’t half make me jump, Hahaha!