So, you stab someone in the middle of the day,
Then walk cursing, but casually away…
You get arrested, to your complete dismay,
Charged with a bladed weapon, they say…
They may also charge you with causing an affray.
And you’re released on bail the same day?
What is all this futile legal foppery?
So, a fine will be nothing; she gets £76,500+ a year,
Expenses on top, bet she’s not feeling toeier!
Coming out of court, she looked full of cheer?
Perhaps she’s going to see the judge for a beer?
Oddlimost, no name of the arrested personage. I can’t see one for the victim, either. This is not going to be a straightforward case!
Robbing, hitting in the face, for chocolates, never?
Is he a Putin spy working undercover?
No permanent home, so a bit of a rover?
He doesn’t look thick, but clever?
Likely he’s a cunning conniver…
He should’ve gotten a job and become an achiever!
Instead of getting himself into all that bovver…
No job involving a hammer, knife or screwdriver!
Perhaps in jail, he’ll train to be a basket weaver?
Or find Christ, and become a believer?
Then he just might stop being a skiver?
The man may have been telling the truth at a whim,
But somehow, I feel a little sympathy for him…
His Mrs giving a verbal onslaught to Darren,
He felt depressed, feeling sick to the brim…
He escaped her nagging, if only for a minim…
And the police went a gorrim!
Drunk or not, he should not have been carrying a knife – that should have been five years for the scumball in a proper prison on its own! Four years in a young offenders’ institution? Pathetic! He’s capable of getting drunk and threatening a woman and child with a knife. A coward, although he no doubts believes he’s not.
Mr Woodall knew alleged killer Campbell through his stepsons Kieran and Joshua – with the three men meeting while they served jail terms at HMP Birmingham. All defendants lived in Nottingham. Mr Heywood added. Mr Woodall lived ‘like a hermit’ on the industrial estate, where he had been renting a unit for about 14 years. The three murder-accused men answered no comment during their police interviews, jurors have been told. McGhee gave officers a prepared statement in which he said: “I have no knowledge of the attack on Carl Woodall and played no part in any attack upon him. I’m not responsible for his death or assaulting him. I do not know who he is.”
Tongue-in-cheek response
UPDATE
Judge Gregory QC: “It will be a prison sentence, of course,”
Vitoldas Platakis, who showed not a sign of remorse…
Killed Valdamara Zemaitiene, not intending to, of course…
They were partners, so there could be no divorce…
He battered her many times, as a matter of course…
He suggested they were having intercourse?
Unintentionally killed her… my arse!.
I’d have liked to win a £260 Amazon gift card…
Thinking I might win one day, I was blinkered…
Freeing oneself from defeat can be awkward,
Success for me is like custard and mustard…
I used to think before my life was completed…
Just once, that failure be temporarily deleted,
If I was to have a win, I would be riveted!
Anyway, my hopes and prayers were not answered!
So now my wishes, not placated, I vacated…
The world of dreams lies ruined and splattered…
But not winning owt, I refuse to be angered,
I can now work on getting other hopes decluttered!
LATE SNIPPET FLASH!
Released while an investigation takes place…
A man who carries a knife, the law, is in a malaise…
Freed, no danger… what if he stabs and slays?
A lot of stabbings in Nottingham; I’m amazed,
Attacking an eighty-year-old? It dismays…
I hope he gets a good fine and serves 5000 days!
Hehehe!
TTFNski, each!