Memory blanks

Inchie. Mon/Tue/Wed 24/25/26th Nov 25

/ Inchie / 16 Comments

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I had a theme for my Ode to relate,
My body needs my brain to cooperate,
It talks to itself – rubbish, bletherskate,
My dream? In a cave, the walls began to corruscate,
I was with someone, a Carer, lover and old mate?
As he/she started on me, to lambaste & berate…
Its body faded, it began to loudly cachinate…  
Folks from my past appeared, as a conglomerate,
Hands in hands, they issued me looks of hate,
Then howled out loud, they did not abate…
I cooked roast potatoes, one on each plate,
I wanted to talk, welcome them, hospitate…
The howling temporarily stopped, as they ate,
Telling me I was a terrible ingrate?
Dark Dank Depressing Darius began to inumbrate,
The cave grew cold, and I began to sudate,
Saying out loud, “What the Hell’s going on, mate?”
Dead relatives came, their intentions vulnerate,
They came towards me, starting to ululate,
I tried to stroke, touch them, to vellicate…
I think they may have escaped via St Peter’s gate,
Their bodies began to rapidly deteriorate…
They started to dissolve, one by one, demoniacal! 
Is this real, happening, or maybe notional?
One went ashen, pasty, anaemic, demonical…
One shrank to nothing, all absorbable,
One cursed & swore at me, all abuseable!
Then exploded. Like a bursting bubble,
One blew me a kiss and said I was adorable.
I tried to hug her, but she was not touchable…
A ghostess, how can she be damageable?
She burst into flames, so she was destructible,
One turned to glass,  she was vitrifiable…
Then found out she was also smashable,
An eerie hum all around started to bominate,
Then the nightmare… morningmare did vacate…
07:00hrs, by gum, I did sleep in late,
Fell off the bed, what’s next to tribulate?
The dream ending might compensate.
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But and however…
This blog was not started until Thursday evening. Wednesday & Thursday were not good for me, but Monday was not too bad at all.
Tuesday was troubled with many mini-seizures, each one with not good after-effects, which took a lot out of me, I’m afraid. Concentration was just not there, many accifauxpas, and
Dawned that regularly, each one seemed deeper than it really was. Tuesday is best forgotten anyway, so the lack of photos or memories of what happened explains the lack of detail in the scrawny Tuesday section. 
Wednesday’s cock-ups ensured me that , bless him, he was again a frequent visitor. Many things will be out of sync and order, sorry. Last night’s lack of sleep, due to
And his ranting, perpetual criticisms of yours truly, made any proper sleep an impossibility. At least the seizures, only two, were lengthy. I judge from the ease and the incredibly short time it took me to recover each time.
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I gave up trying to sleep. Assuming it was about 04:00hrs, but soon found out, after taking of the night bag and going to the wet room to tackle the morning ablutionalisationings… as Carer Manpreet came in it to the flat, that it was actually gone 07:00hrs! WE got the Health Checks done & recorded, and the medications were issued.

Calendar changed, tea brewed.

Morrison order.
Moved them into the kitchen.
Treats!
Favourites.
Fridge loaded.

Afternoon seizures.

Evening shot.


Memory, Jet Black Blank
Seizures were having a heyday.

Morning shot, I think.

Evening shot, I think.

Just a guess at this rating.

Another stormy night’s sleep. If it wasn’t for my taking a bashing from , I may well have still been in bed when the Carer came again.
I decided to force my reluctant body from the bed, primarily, to get a painkiller, to counter the pain from Shirley’s worst-ever night-attack. 
I didn’t make it. I’m not sure how long it lasted, but it wasn’t long. I could tell after it was all over by the acid reflux coming up in my chest, throat, mouth, and nose, and it was taking so long for me to recover fully. Although, to be honest, I don’t think I did get back to normal, if anything about me can be called normal, (Hehe!) Until 17:00hrs, or so.
My plan, formulated this morning, was to get things ready for when Ejaz arrives, go with me to the opticians, and then do as much as I could in the time left, working on the replacement word list.

Carer Manpreet arrived, and she checked that the HC return figures had been recorded correctly. Medications were given. A gaping blank spot in my memory. I assume I’d had a seizure, but Manpreet didn’t tell me… or I didn’t hear or remember her saying. The state I was in after each one today is no surprise. I got on with the word listings for an hour or two. To my utter amazement, an Asda delivery arrived. What? Another food delivery? Beats and worried me.
Cheesey cobs. cheesey wriggles, and some iced bread rolls. I tried to gain access to my vacant memory void, to work out when and why.
Come to think of it, I may have got the delivery days wrong, sort of back to way, on the wrong days. They may have been the other way around. Or, not.
Topped up with waters of various types. It’s costly having to keep swigging a minimum of three litres every day to keep the bladder working.
Meat pies with shortcrust and puff pastry tops. Polish cooked smoked ham, Nurses drinkies, and some bacon bits, erm… lardons they are called.
Blimus, I’ve got the fridge and freezer crammed full again. But of course, the social lady promised me help with this problem. Also, with the finances, when I get home from the hospital. Assured me of help with the ‘spent a fortune’ on wheelchairs… getting them appropriately fitted and safe to use. 
Age Concern said… Oh, forget them. I’ve not heard anything from any of them! I’m disappointed and feeling a smidge uncared about, to say the least.

Carer Mizra, then Carer Ejaz, arrived. Mizra departed after medicating me and seeing that things were alright. Ejaz and I got down to the Opticians only to find that we had arrived too late and they could not test my eyes. Ejaz dealt with the receptionist, and they made another appointment for next Wednesday. How we got the wrong time beats me. Ejaz has always taken care of them for me. Sadly, my eyes are getting worse, and later I checked on the HHS site – bad news. It said that if you do not catch it in time, it cannot be repaired. Great! Now it will be another week before the test, and the optician can refer me to the EENT! 
The eye is getting worse each day, and I’m struggling at times. Nothing new there then.
Ejaz and I returned to the flat, and he put the laundry in the washer. Mopped the kitchen for me, and went to get the laundry into the dryer, and realised it had not finished washing. So left it until his subsequent call to collect it for me. Off he went; he’d done the best he could on my behalf.

I pressed on with the word listings, and Ejaz returned to fetch the laundry for me, and he hung it up on hangers. Night medications given.

I started making a template up for this 3-day blog… and realised it was gone 23:00hrs! 

Better get something to eat.

🤎 TTFNski! 🤎

Inchie Today: Sunday 23nd November 2025

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May peace appear and adhere,
Today and for your future,
Ailments wane, for even longer…
Joy to each peacekeeper & peace lover,
Help from an evil-abrocator?
May humankind find benignity?
Can we all live again, less bleak & darker?
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03:30hrs: I bounded out of the hospital bed and somersaulted over the recliner, hit the deck and did a nifty 200 press-ups, followed by another 200 toe-touches. Nipped onto the snow and ice-covered balcony, and did fifteen minutes of shadow boxing. Opened a window and yodelled a good morning to all the wonderful people nearby. Then, I hopscotched to the wet room. Taking off my night cather pouch as I  hopped along. Well… that may be a bit of a slight exaggeration? Hahaha! Here’s the reality. 05:30hrs, I reluctantly stirred and tried to will and urge the clock to go backwards. It didn’t work, of course. So, I moved to the edge of the bed and freed the nocturnal catheter from the day bag. Dizzy Dennis was prompted into action as I had to bend down. Although I did not do the balance exercises, as I made my way into the kitchen to check if I’d left taps on, cookers on or fridge doors open, I was coping well, with very few wobbles from the catheters either.
All being in order in the kitchen, I visited the Porcelan Throne. I was a few inches off getting seated on the toilet lid, and a torrent of Trotsky Terence proportions fell, no, squirted, no, thundered into the porcelain, with a splash, and it was all finished! It honestly looked as if I’d decorated the bowl with brown emulsion eggshell paint. And had applied multiple coats too! Tsk!

I finally got out of the wetroom after an awful lot of cleaning up was carried out, Haha! Then I took these shots of the view, such as it was, from the kitchen.
Not very good, I’m afraid. I’ve been struggling lately to take any worthwhile morning shots. I could hear the police helicopter flying, but not see it.

I made a brew of tea and got the morning HC checks done next. Then had a think about how I could work things out, to get a shower with my ablutions.
I decided to get the straps off of the legs and ask Ejaz to take the socks off for me. Ejaz arrived at this point. As I chose not to have a shower after all. (Why, I can’t really recall at this moment) Ejaz got the socks off, then helped wash and dry my feet. Bless him. Issued the medications. No point in any creaming, foaming, or body checks until after I’d finished my ablutions.
He did a quick hoover around, bless him again.

I took this shot from the kitchenette window as the morning brightened up a little. But the rain started to come down. Another bad photo. I managed to capture, top left, a patch of turquoise sky that was not visible to the naked eye when I snapped it.

Back into the wetroom, and started the overdue body, teggie, cleaning. Before shaving, I felt the blood coming from . I got things cleaned up, dried and ointmentated various areas of my magnificent, noned, staut, healthy body, where it was required.
There were quite a few in need, but things like the Cartilages, Atkritis, Fractured-Knee-Frankie, Lymphorrea Leslie and Ingrowing Toenail Terry were unreachable. Well, I could have reached them, I suppose, but the pain and or dizziness I get bending made me shy away from even trying to medicate them. Chicken!
Getting the PPs on went amazingly well today! In fact, it was the easiest ever. 
And… Little Inchies’ Fungal Lesion did not bleed! 
Not only that, I’m not kidding… but I had no cuts shaving, and did not walk into any door or wall, all day long!

As I hung the towel to dry on the clothes airer in the hallway, I came as close to tripping over the electric cable without falling as I ever had; it was a miracle. This actually brought on my old, much-missed saviour and friend .
I pushed myself on the wall to prevent getting tangled in the heater and wire, and I hit the back of the other wall, which was where I’d left the walking stick, a bit of good luck there! I grabbed it and used the other wall to regain my balance. A definite and wonderful welcome !

Then, the Khagoule needed handwashing, quickly, before the hot water tank refilled and while it was still hot enough. Isn’t life awkward at times? Haha!

I got the dressing gown washed, and got soaked while wringing the Khagoule out after washing it, but it didn’t bother me, for was with me. Which meant I didn’t give a damn about me getting wet, and the kitchen floor would need cleaning or mopping!
Puft! Sod ’em all & everything! I hung up the shirt in the wet room to dry.

However, while mopping the floor, I slipped a little and twisted , but it wasn’t the pain it caused. I think it was the disappointment of me having a little run of good luck, for about 15 minutes, then things falling back into my usual feeling of defeatism. Self-pity and self-lambasting started!
. I felt so hard done by for some reason. Life is like this for me every single day, so why should it get to me so much more on this occasion? I think I just explained that?

I got on with the blogging at long last, and Carer Mizra arrived. A grand lad. He had to rush, but still got the socks and straps back on the legs for me and kept within his time quota. Thanks to Ejaz, Misra & Ahram for their understanding today.

The rain, although heavy at times, was start-stop at the same time. Does that make sense? I nipped into the balcony to take a snap of the end car park.

Later, I took snaps of the view from the kitchen again, hoping to get a decent one for once. The first one, to the left, was not too bad.
The second one was taken to the right of the window.
Not too good again.
I was determined to get a reasonably decent snap for the third one, Hahaha!
Oh, Flipping ‘eck!
I might give up trying to take night shops in the future… shops? Now I can’t even type right, or take might photos!

Carer Ahram arrived, and he issued the medications. Emptied the catheter jug for me. He checked that the last HC figures were recorded correctly. Thanks, mate.
Blogging, time to start the Ode, methinks.

Sunday morning catch-up.

Something people don’t eat often nowadays. Faggots in gravy with mashed potatoes. A ready-made microwave meal from Parsley Box. I made extra pork gravy, added it to the mix, and dunked two large cheesy-topped bread rolls in it. Do folks do this now? Well, I love them. Especially the faggots, they taste good to me, and no bother about what few rotting, hurting teeth I have left.
An old-fashioned meal?
Well, yes, but so am I. Hehehe!

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I.C.C. Carers’ Manpreet, Mizra, Abdul, and the last one, whose name I forgot to ask. Ejaz did not make any calls again today. Shame!

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🤎 MAY PEACE & JOY INVADE YOU 🤎
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Inchy: Friday 21st November 2025

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While he was a barrister, he must have learned all the tricks of the crooked trade, for lying and getting away with it. And realised he had, too. Lying by omission, blatant falsities, and cunning answers given when challenged as well. Always prepared to add to the lies he’d already spouted; blame others. His amazing ability to keep a straight face when he’s in the wrong and to pretend to give an explanation is a precious gift for any man, but he is a cut above the others. Credit where it’s due, not since Winston Churchill has any man fibbed better than Herr Starmer. Yes, we know many, if not all, of the PMs lied while in office.
Wilson, Thatcher, Blair, Cameron… not forgetting the United Nations top dogs! Let’s be fair… 

The United Nations has been criticised for a variety of reasons, including its policies, ideology, equality of representation, administration, enforcement of rulings, and bias. Often cited points of criticism include a perceived lack of the body’s efficacy (including a total lack of effectiveness in both pre-emptive measures and de-escalation of existing conflicts which have ranged from social disputes to all-out wars); collusion, Discrimination, appeasement, promotion of globalism, inaction, abuse of power by nations exerting general control over the General Assembly, corruption and misappropriation of resources. Many United Nations decisions are seen as failures to prevent armed conflicts and to enforce the Charter of the United Nations.
The United Nations has faced several significant scandals over the years, involving various leaders and agencies in allegations of corruption, abuse of power, and sexual misconduct. (76).

Whistleblower Retaliation and Misconduct Cover-ups.

The UN has faced persistent criticism for a “culture of fear” and failure to protect whistleblowers who try to expose corruption, misogyny, sexual abuse, and other wrongdoing within the organisation.

Kofi Annan (Secretary-General 1997-2006):

Annan’s tenure was overshadowed by the “Oil-for-Food” scandal, a massive corruption scheme in the UN’s humanitarian program for Iraq. The program was rife with accusations that profits were unlawfully diverted to the Iraqi government and UN officials.

Ban Ki-moon (Secretary-General 2007-2016): While not personally charged with a major financial scandal, his tenure included an admission of the UN’s culpability in a cholera outbreak in Haiti, caused by UN aid workers from Nepal, which killed over 10,000 people. The UN initially claimed diplomatic immunity, but later apologised and committed to aid (which has been slow to materialise).

John Ashe (President of the UN General Ass 13-20):

Ashe was arrested and charged with corruption by U.S. authorities, accused of accepting over $1 million in bribes from Chinese businessmen in exchange for supporting their interests within the UN.

Mukhisa Kituyi (UNCTAD Secretary-General):

The UN Conference on Trade and Development was accused of nepotism in 2016 when Kituyi reportedly appointed his son-in-law to a high-level position.

Corruption and Mismanagement within Agencies:

UNOPS Scandal: In 2023, the UN sought repayment of $63.6 million from a former official involved in a failed investment program, highlighting a “massive breakdown of financial oversight” within the UN Office for Project Services (UNOPS).

UNRWA Allegations: A 2019 ethics report accused the leadership of the UN Relief and Works Agency for Palestine Refugees (UNRWA) of abuse of power.

Whistleblower Retaliation: The UN has faced severe criticism for a “culture of fear” and for firing whistleblowers who attempted to expose wrongdoing, corruption, and sexual abuse, rather than protecting them.

Intelligence and Spying: There have been allegations of member states, including the U.S., UK, and Australia, conducting phone-tapping operations and spying on UN officials, including former Secretary-General Kofi Annan and weapons inspector Hans Blix. 

Just thought I’d mention them, back to Starmer’s Ode…
Lies? He cleverly avoids being admittable,
He worries not of this not being affordable,
His antics have made MPs & voters alienable,
His promises are amendable,
His decisions are not fully analysable,
His attitude is somewhat antagonisable
One thing I always find anticipatable…
His answers will be untruthful and antisociable,
His decisions will not be appealable,
His comments include being self-applaudable,
From crimes against humanity, he should be arrestable,
Sausage not hostage, made him a spectacle,
Robbing pensioners, not guilt attachable…
Now MPs rebel… it was unavoidable,
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05:30hrs: I stirred. Moved the knees, wriggled my lower regions, no signs of too much bother or pain. Got slowly onto the side of the bed and bent down to remove the night pouch from the catheter. Did the exercises and stood up to test my balance. Only slightly wonky. This was the best condition I’ve woken up in for many days. Catheters and Dizzy Dennis were all mild. Yee-haa!

Mug of tea.

Another strange one.

Phorpaining.
Well, the new chemist is issuing Ibrolgel Forte. The same thing under a different name
Health Checks recorded.

One pad on – one won’t go.

CorelDraw work.

Bikkie Barrels Reloaded!

Gotten Himmel.
Emptied it just in time.

More hand washing.

Night drinkie.

Getting dark.

Caught it!

Sweet & sour vegetables.
Qurh added Fung Po sauce.

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🤎 Bless Yers All. Thanks! 🤎
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THIS BLOG WAS WRITTEN SUGAR-FREE

Inchie Today: Saturday 22nd November 2025

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I was sat-sitting in my broken recliner chair, Ftrali
And the community nurse did appear,
Took off the leg straps, checked Lymphoreoa Leslie, 
Left leg fine, right leg was a little bloody,
The right leg was medicated with cream & a plaster,
Replace socks & straps, easy for her to master,
I like this retired nurse, the twinkling of her eyes…
A no-fuss gal, who seems very wise,
My adoration, I could not disguise,
Of course, I only imagined her thighs…
Or she’d laugh at my miniature size,
It would only end sadly with sighs,
Naturally, I could only apotheosise,
All I could do was to eulogise,
Whenever she calls, she beautifies…
Even though my pulse may rise,
With my disabilities, there’s no compromise,
Why I feel this way, I need to analyse,
At my age, this urge to harmonise…
With nothing below to energise,
I feel as if I should apologise,
My body can no longer mutually synchronise,
If I say I accept this, it would all be lies,
All I can do nowadays is to fantasise,
Been waiting to be trephinated for 102 days,
Glaucoma operation, I’ve lost count of the days!
Silence from the neurologist diagnosing my seizures,
Broken knee, catheter, hearing problems, arthritis,
Lymphorrhoea, colour-blind, and duodenal ulcers,
My left wrist, hand, and fingers had five fractures,
Tried veganism, vegetarianism, cereals and pulses,
A Labour Government, full of fakesters,
Begging for help, but getting no answers,
In the hospital, I had several unfulfilled promises,
From Neurology, Cardiac, & Social Services,
A surgeon will need good eyesight to circumcise
There were threats made against the nurses,
From a bloke face-to-face, emitting curses…
I was stick-walking with the physiotherapists,
I got involved when the man clenched his fist,
Told him, ‘Do that again, you’ll get my fist’,
He went quiet. I think he got my drift,
The nurse thanked me for my intrusion,
That patient is suffering ego-depletion,
Is this ward for those with damaged grey matter?
Anyway, the man gave the nurses no more bother,
Getting back from the hospital last month? Dystopian!
I’d been to see my  neuropathy diagnostician,
I got lost trying to get to the tram,
Had to ask some “Where am I?’,
How to get to the tram station?,
I got there after some extravasation,
The ticket machine brought confusion into the equation,
Passengers were squashed in the tram so tightly…
Just getting into it was a Hell of a fight…
Will I ever get home tonight?
Then I suffered a heck of a fright!
The tram moved of and I took a tumble,
Help from others made me feel humble,
Two passengers helped me up without exhortation,
They caught me mid-fall, avoiding emasculation,
A lady gave me her seat without vacillation,
In the City Centre, yobboes were the danger,
Schoolkid gangs, I had to walk on tramlines, however…
I struggle up to the bus top, with great endeavour,
Checked the 40 bus times, none, only 40x?
This one did not call into the flats, oh boyee!
Dark outside, lit-up inside, I couldn’t see,
Which bus stop was the one for me?
Ended up in Sherwood, nine stops away,
Had to walk back up Windcheste Street, steep and hilly,
Help by using my four-wheeled walker trolley,
Many stops, as I went breathlessly…
Getting a cellphone call, and silly me…
Dropped in in the darkness, dearie me!
Got home to find Elaz waiting, worried!
Carer Ejaz by name, and Carer in reality!
I suppose I should mention my banality?
Dullness, unoriginality or predictability…
No, not predictability, that would be silly…
Certainly not descriptive of Inchie,
Seizure, tumbles, &, ailments with unpredictability,
Why can humankind not live with congruency?
A question of imbecility, verging on stupidity,
Each incident, occurrence, and contingency,
Can pop up suddenly, unexpectedly…
No one can be completely accident-free,
Politicians used to act collectivistically,
Is the coming Apocalypse be cataclysmically?
Societal collapse, to humankind, devastatingly?
I don’t view it as a catastrophe,
Politicians becoming deific…
They really do make me feel sick,
See the end, as being welcome and terrific!,
It’ll come soon, but I can’t be specific.
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Sorry, but it’ll be short and sweet. Time is thy enemy.
Well, he is mine. Hehehe!

Morning shot from the kitchen

No visit to the Porcelain Throne until late evening. But I felt it brewing up in the afternoon.
Tiny escapages that stunk awful, putrid!
I’m expecting a Trotsky Terence affair later.

Carer Ejaz did the first two calls. Body checks, Phorpain gelling, Barrier creaming tended to.

Midday Darkness?

Oh, I nearly missed this one.
The end of the car park.
🎵Where have all the pappaps gone?🎵

NOSH
Faggots in gravy, & mashed potatoes.
I peeled & cooked a beetroot, then chopped it, added some of the gorgeous Krakus red beetroot, concentrated borstch, and some pork gravy, mixed it all up, and cooked it in the microwave for 6 minutes.
I’ve redeveloped a fancy for faggots lately. The Parsley Box ready meals have great tasting gaggots… no, I meant faggots, not maggots… I made a grammatical mess of typing that! I thought I’d just leave it in. Sad! Hehe!

Soaked up the tasty liquid with two large cheesy-topped bread rolls, Mmm!

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =
“Hasta luego, cocodrilo”
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

Inchie: Monday 1st December 2025

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06:10hrs, woke up. Pouch off in great haste, and off to the Porcelain Throne; walking into the door frame en route, while scrambling to take off the nightdress in time, before the anticipated involuntary start of the rear end motion, flowed. I DIDN’T MAKE IT IN TIME. 
As almost expected, sent me into the frame as I sat down as Trotsky Terence’s torrent evacuated in AI mode. ‘Huh!’
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Unease, discomfiture, shame, humiliation, frustration and near-mortification joined in with me swearing as I self-lambasted and verbally groaned at the ego-sinking predicament I now found myself in! 
I’m not sure if it was in sympathy or taking-the-piss mode, but kicked off as I stood up to assess the mess and the damage I’d done to the wet room floor, its accoutrements and myself in the part-tumble. But Shirley seemed intent on yanking the glenohumeral-shoulder ball out of its socket! I’m sure she’ll manage it one day. I hope not!
I had to wait for her onslaught to die down before I could do anything. I did have a nearly empty tube of the pain gel in the wet room on the floor cabinet, which I’d knocked off of the cabinet along with several other items. Olive oil dropper, eye drops, Germoloid & Germolene ointments, amongst others. I was amazed at how little time it seemed to me to pick everything up, get the antiseptic mop out, use it, and rub some porphain gel on the shoulder. In a really short time?

I did realise what had taken place afterwards. It was mt anger at myself that enabled me to get things done so quickly, I reckon. All that genuflecting needed to clean things up, and then I had to cope with   and giving me some stick. Still, at least had stopped.

As I left the wet room, a Carer came in… I’ve been asked not to mention Carers’ names on my blog, or to use any photos, and to remove those I’ve used in the past. So I did and will not.
The Carer was a smidge concerned at my het-up state. I didn’t mention the wet room incident, and I think I got away with it by using Dettol and a fresh air spray after the clean-up. She sorted the medications and made a brew of tea for me after getting me to sit down and settle. Helped with the HC checks and monitored the  Excel sheet. I’d not made any errors this time. 👍🏼
The Carer took the waste bags with her to the chute as she departed with my thanks.
I turned down her offer of Phorpaining, as I’d only wash it off later when I get around to doing my ablutions. If I do get around to them, that is, of course, reliant on and how the seizures affect me and if they will be calmer and less frequent today. (Please may it be so!)
I’m not sure why, let’s face it, whenever I am? But for some reason, Depression Darius has not visited me yet. I give him the two fingers on my graphic here to two of my ailments. 
Coping well with this?

It would still be nice… no, delightful to have a call from . He’s been a little shy lately. I hope I haven’t upset him. Hehehe!

Oh, I missed this snap off earlier. Better late than never. Poignantly, it’s the same with my mate High Mood Horis’s absence.
I’m afraid.

Carers’ second call, no names, but a man. Medications given – no gelling as I’m going to try again to get my daily done.

I finished my now-gone-cold tea, put the computer to sleep, and off I went back to the wet room. Somewhat nervously, after my last visit, Haha!
Change my mind; I’d better get the clothes I’m wearing washed first. Mid washing the khagoule, the door chime rang. It was a postman with a delivery. He was cheery and laughed as he departed. I put it in the kitchen and got on with the washing. Hanging it in the wetroom up on the shower rail…
And the door chime chimed again. This was via DHL They left a box outside the door. Put that in the kitchen and finished hanging up the Khagoule, when I realised that I’d taken the first box from the postman without any clothes on! That’s me without any clothes on, not the postman! Now, I realise what he must have been laughing at… Say, no more! Well, it could have been my catheter bag contraption, or maybe Shower-Cover, or my flabby elephantine body that tickled him? But my guess is that it must have been Little Inchie with blood leaking from the pouch tube inserted… Hehehe!

It seems to have been hours since I set out to get my done. At long last, the interruptions stopped, and I finished hanging the Khagoule. I have to say that this session went well… no, I’m not joking, this wet room session was one of the best for months. I’ll tell you why, shall I? My body scrub was incident-free and cushty! I cut my ginger nails without a single sign of blood! Hoverwaxed both earholes without any sign of blood! Barrier creamed the areas I could reach, Phorpaingels the knees, Cartilages and where I could get to on my back. Am I now beginning to sound smug? It gets better! I got the drops in the left eye without any running down my cheek & into my mouth. Fair enough, the right eye did not go too well, Cor, the taste of those eye drops! Hamorrhoid Harold was medicated, with again, no bleeding!
A couple of slight mishaps rocked the smooth ride, though. I dropped a razor and had the picker-upperer to retrieve it, but it was in a tight corner behind the cistern, and getting my good eye on its exact location was difficult. I ended up picking what I thought was the disposable razor and grabbed it. It was an open pack of blades that I hadn’t used for years. And still I can’t get any help with the cleaning!

I eventually got the Hoover out to touch up the carpet… this would be at an estimate, about 15:00hrs.
50 minutes later, I found the power charger and plugged it in. I’ll hoover the carpet in the morning then. But, “The best-laid schemes o’ mice an’ men / Gang aft agley” Poem by Rabbi Burns – 1785. Original text

Getting dark early nowadays, then again, it always does when winter arrives. It’ll be worse for us pensioners now that Starmer has stolen our winter fuel allowance. A filthy-shitty, uncaring, nasty, pseudo PM, the uncaring Right-Wing decision from our back-hander taking, lying ex barrister… his father was a toolmaker, did you know? I’d much appreciate it if he died as painfully and as quickly as possible. I love to be alive to celebrate his passing. That would be a rare blessing for me. I wish I could yodel at his funeral. I think I’ll get the lyrics done, just in case he does do the honourable thing and tops himself. I believe I got carried away again there… sorry.

A very welcome late visit from Horis! He didn’t stay long. But it was Heaven while he did!

FOOD!

Bombay potatoes tonight!
I tasted them, and they were a smidgen too hot for me. So, I added some Gun-Po sauce, stirred, and reheated it. Grrreat!

May many Fairies from fantasyland…
Bring you peace, and a Magic wand!
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Inchy:Thursday 20th November 25

/ Inchie / 9 Comments

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It already has vulgarisation, 
No shortage of unsophistication,
Proletariats filled with dissatisfaction,
So much violence & traumatisation, 
Greed, envy, but little affection…
Megar-rich Oligarchs get much satisfaction,
Questioned, they threaten a nuclear reaction,
Politician with their lies and extortion…
Threaten each other, and the futilitarian,
Not humanitarian, but they offer humiliation,
Invalidation, invasion, verbal invention,
Warnings, battles, child deaths; no mediation,
Babies die, no food or water, no medication…
Humankind’s morals need a recalibration, 
Hopes, fair values need a reactivation, 
Worldwide, each and every person…
Hatred, greed… what chance of elimination?
I’m lucky, I’m close to my termination,
How can we have a compassion rejuvenation?
I see no chance of any reconciliation,
Our youngsters will need reharmonisation
Will they see our savours rematerialisation?
Or, remilitarisation and remobilisation?
Peace is in dire need of resuscitation.
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06:00hrs: Woke with a startle to find that she was rattling the ball joint for all she was worth! I waited a minute or so until she calmed down, then did the balance exercises, got the taken off, gathered the needs of the ablutioning session, and waddled gingerly off to the wetroom.

Two nicks shaving, teeth & gums bleeding. Had a controlled session. And medicated the usual ailments as needed and within reach for me to do so. The only spot of bother was coming from . I did struggle a little more than usual getting the protection pants on due to Frank.

Put the kettle on and popped into the balcony to take this shot through the kitchenette window. Cold, very cold today. Then I meandered back to the kitchen to take this snap of the end of the car park. It came out rather well, with the sun coming up from the back. Showed the contrast of the thin mud slide with and out of the sunshine. The liquid seemed to contain bubbles, or maybe snow? Then I noticed the tyre marks. I assume a vehicle had reversed into the watery mud to turn round.

Arrived as I was making a brew of tea in the kitchen. She recognised I was not up to par, bless her. Medications issued. Body areas were checked and balmed. Knees were Phorpained.

CorelDraw on to sort the photos. Problems again. Moved on to yesterday’s blog.

Got carried away with rebuilding the word list again. Over three hours this time. Tsk! I didn’t seem to be able to stop myself from doing it.

Carer Nizra arrived. Painkillers given with Peptac.

Back on the word listings, then a District Nurse arrived to remedicate the right leg for me. I think she is a retired nurse, now doing community nursing. I like her; she is no-fuss and has a twinkle in her eyes.
She got the strapping off, removed the protection plaster, wiped the wounds and put a new medicated plaster one. Strappings back on top, and she was ready to go. ❤ Bade her thanks and farewell.

The following hour and bit are a complete blank to me. I jotted down the time the nurse arrived, so I was pretty sure I’d been out of it for an hour and 20 minutes. But there were on acidy upsurges from the innards, and I was not feeling dizzy, confused or out of balance. So, I could not have had a seizure. Puzzling? ! I’ve never come out from a seizure before without the acrid taste shooting up from the innards,  through my throat, mouth, and nose.
Did I fall asleep? Possible, I suppose.

Carer Ahram turned up, and here I was, looking at an almost-empty blog page for today! Miles behind with everything again. Humph! Ahram issued the medications, and I realised that I was struggling to understand what he was saying, not only that, I think I was not talking properly, a bizarre sensation.


Sunet photographs.
The sun was in a rush to hide?
Tried a close, not very good

Cheerio, sun!

Food came to mind. I decided on a ready-made stew, added some gravy I made from instant powder, mixed it in a microwave bowl, and put the lot in the oven for five minutes. While I got the two sourdough rolls left and put them on the tray.
I thought it had a decent taste. See tomorrow’s blog to see why it wasn’t too good. Hehe!

Carer Ejaz made the last flash call. Painkillers and a quick natter about things, and off he shot.

I went to wash the pots up, and the view out of the kitchen window looked so attractive that I tried taking some shots of it.
Neither were they up to much.
Still, I did my bestest!

= = = = = = = = = = = =
TTFNski, all!
= = = = = = = = = = = =

= = = = = = = = = = = =
= = = = = = = = = = = =

“Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.” I think…

Inchie: Wed 19th Nov 25

/ Inchie / 6 Comments

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My problems continue to be compounded,
But on this subject, I’m not particularly confused,
For my abilities have been commandeered,
I knew this was coming; I’ve long feared,
But there is no way this can be repaired,
Tasks, dreams, & wants cannot be completed,
Failure has to be conceded, accepted…
Although the causes are comprehended,
Problem-solving gets my brain circumvolved,
My balance gets hazy, giddy, circumlocuted,
Dark Dank Depression Darius is generated,
Self-pity can often be provoked, expedited,
Offers of help fail, after being countenanced,
Carer Ejaz today, really-really helped…
He got me an appointment in Sherwood,
He’s cheeky, but such a lovely lad,
They’ve cut his calls down. I was so sad,
Today, once again, he made me glad,
Suddenly, things don’t feel quite as bad!
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05:40: I remembered to do the balance exercises this morning. Honestly! First time in days, Hehe!
Got the nocturnal pouch off, and while emptying it, the need for an evacuation arose. I should think it took me at most 60 seconds to get seated, and Pwhor!
An Irish stew-like torrential burst of semi-liquid shot out as if it were nuclear-powered! Well, it was all over in seconds, ten at most! That was a bit of luck. If I’d been in the kitchen, I’d never have made it in time!

Off to the kitchen… 
I’d left the bloody hot tap running all night again!
Good news, remembering the balance routine. Then, my being close enough to avert a Porvelain Throne embarrassment in the wet room. Now bad in the kitchen. Do you realise I’ve had more good than bad luck this morning? !

While waiting for the kettle to boil, I took three photographicalistions with my Kodak Tim 2 camera from the kitchenette window, of the dark, rainy view it beheld. The first one was not a good one at all, of the front car park. I tried again and made an even worse job of it. However, this did not stop me from making another effort, determined to get one passable photo out of the session. Well, it wasn’t going to challenge Savis Bailey’s reputation, Haha! But it was a smidge improved on the first two, I think.

I got the Health Checks sorted. Then I got the results put into the NHS graph thingamajig. It was nerve-racking how long it took to open Excel!

Carer Manpreet arrived. She sorted the medications and wanted to do a body check, cleaning, and foaming, but I explained that I have not had a shorter shave or wash yet, due to my newfound ability to keep leaving the hot tap running in the kitchen, daily! 
Manpreet checked the HC figures; I’d got one wrong again. Good Luck 2 – Crap-Luck 6. That soon changed the odds. As Manpreet was leaving, the forgotten about Ocado order arrived.
Manpreet took the bags into the kitchen for me, which was very welcome and appreciated.

Some treats for the old man had come. Biscuits were Scottish Shortcakes. Cheesy curls and onion rings were put in the main junk-computer room for ease of access to nibble. He-he!
Jason’s sourdough rolls. Cheesy-topped rolls. Tucks, cheese & caramelised. Freshly cooked beetroot and cooked Polish Kielbasa sausages, and several bottles of Spring water. 

On with the blogging at long last. I was titivating a CorelDraw graphic, and…
The computer froze! I was depressed instantly! I pondered over what had caused this for a while, and soon realised the only answer, not a cure, was to turn it all off at the power. I crossed fingers, and did. I waited for a few minutes and took another photo from the kitchen window. The first one of the slower-melting snow in the field.
Then one of the front car park for the third time. This one came out clearer. But it was a lot lighter, so I expected a better job.
Then I went back to the computer and turned it on.
I think the photos were taken out of fear or frustration, at least as a way to forget or hide the problem.
The computer came on all right. I temporarily changed some details in the Excel graph, changed them back, and the programme saved each one. So far, so good. Then I opened CorelDraw.
WHAT A PICKLE!
It started to load; it’s always been a slow job. When, as usual, CorwlDraw opened the last-edited page, I got so many error messages. I was bamboozled.
I was still trying to sort out the problems (over an hour lost so far), and Carer Misra arrived. He checked the second HC figures for me. Peptac and a painkiller were given. While he was here, the door chime rang out, and Carer Ejaz came in to do a more extended visit. Now I was getting more muddled than ever. Nizra was thanked, and he departed. Ejaz took the laundry down and got it in the washer.

Ejaz returned and took up the task of calling Virgin Media. Oh, no, first helped and guided me through an email they sent me yesterday evening. We had to change the password and merge details with my EE account. That took ages, but worked nicely thanks to Ejaz’s input. 

Then, as he saw how I was struggling to see correctly, Ejaz suggested I ring the Doctor to get a referral for the EENT department to see about my worsening Glaucoma. Good idea. He called them and spoke with the patient assessor for some time. Handed me the landline handset to answer the bloke’s questions, he sounded as usual, uptight, short and sharp in speech. 
I was starting my reply…
AND THE LINE CLUNKED AS HE CUT ME OFF!
As Ejaz and I spoke of the problem, Ejaz decided to ring the EENT directly. We got the number from the web. No answer. As we chatted further, I remembered that it was not the Doctor who referred me to the EENT over my Cataracts, it was the optician!
I got the same Sherwood optician’s number, and Ejaz rang them to ask for an appointment on a Wednesday, then he could go with me. After a short phone call, he declared that he’d got an appointment for me at 12:20hrs next Wednesday, 26th November. 
Thank heavens for Ejaz! The lad went down to collect the laundry, returned with it, and hung it up for me. He’d looked after me well today with the appointment making. Thanks, lad!

The only issue is that no cleaning was done. No paperwork done. And no date checking. Not Ejaz’s fault, did a great job, but ran out of time. I’ve begged the social to give me more Carer time, but no.
Next week, nothing will get cleaned either, as we are going out to the opticians!
This place is going to be in a right mess.
Still, I am delighted to get to the opticians, and hope he can refer me to the EENT to get the left eye sorted. Lefty is so faded and blurry that I can’t really use it. I was thinking of getting an eye pad. Does anyone have any advice out there, please? 
There’s no doubt that if he does pass me on, it will be a long wait. Can’t be helped. A bit like me. That’s not true. Ejaz & Mizra do their best and are pleasant with it. But Ejaz is only doing one call at night every day, except Wednesday, which is making things difficult. To put things in perspective.

After Ejaz rushed off, I went to make a brew of tea. I must get around to seeing if the computer will work again yet.
That’s how late it is!

Carer Ahram did the late call.
Ejaz might do the night call.

I got back on the computer.
It took me ages and a lot of tweaking to get CorelDraw to load the last graphic used. I had to move files around into a less heavily used folder, so many that I can’t remember where for next time this happens.
I loaded eventually, but it would not save. I had to search for CDR files and delete some to get it to save, but it isn’t working at the moment.
I used CCleaner and then Norton to clear more, hoping I haven’t buggered something up and that it won’t start in the morning.

Highly satisfactory!

I’ve had successes today, thanks to the Carers, particularly Ejaz, with appointments obtained.
But plenty of failures.
FED UP!

TTFNski

Inchie: Tues 18 Nov 25

/ Inchie / 8 Comments

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I dream of good health,
And a bit of wealth,
I don’t want a gold delf,
But my mind’s full of unwanted cultch,
In deciding anything, I’m a bit of a drench…
My dreams often produce their own stench,
I’ve lived in a lonely shell, wittwontenish,
With only myself to loathe and fratch,
Confidence & contentment I couldn’t catch,
I got no benefits, praise or backseesh,
No pets allowed, no cat, no dog, no fitch,
Stuck indoors, am I bothered? Very much,
My problems are many, and not picayunish.
No more moaning, I’m sick of doing it,
I’d like to travel and seek out the Sasquatch…
Go to the coast, and sit on the beach,
I’m going to stop being so poltroonish…
Try to stop acting paganish,
One more thing I would rather wish,
To see Starmer impeached!
I’ve lost the Ode’s plot again. Sheesh!
Let’s all pray for world peace.
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Up at 05:25hrs. Night pouch removed, and into the kitchen to check taps, cooker, fridge doors, etc.
Pleased with the photo I took this morning. It was an incredible blue sky up there this morning. I could hear emergency services sirens.
Of to the for an evacuation. Things started to move, then froze solid! A tiny section of the torpedo that had begun to escape practically had to be chipped away. Hahaha! Rock solid! I’ll ask for a Senna when the Carer calls later on.

Back to the kitchenette, and got the kaghoule hand-washed in the sink. It was a wick job, cause this one is made with fragile, thin material, cotton, I think. It’s comfy, but in winter it’s a bit cold to wear without a dressing gown. I hung it up to dry on the wet-room shower rail. Then I got a heavier black one with a kangaroo pocket to use after the scrub-wash, brush-up, shave & medicating were completed. Which went well!

No cuts, shaving. The teeth bled, of course, as did the gums. No droppages… although for the rest of the day, I was dropping so many things, I swore at myself.
The medications I could reach to use, apart from the fingal lesion cream, went well and were not painful at all. The lesion always hurts. The nasal & eyes were sprayed, then the ears were done last.
Got perfumed and dressed. All but had a tumble getting the protection pants on, but didn’t go over. Then off to the main junk room and into the bacony to take a couple of photographs. The first one of the dead end beyond the car park. The puddle of soil
had well-filled the end parking zone again. As I turned to get back into the flat, I twisted , but the pain was far less than it had been on previous occasions. Was this going to be a better day? Will Batman & Robin… Hehe!

I carried out the first BP checks and recorded them on the whiteboard to go on the computer later. Then made a brew of Typhoo extra-strong tea and had a couple of bikkies dunked and eaten. When I say a couple… Hehehe!

I got to the door, and nobody was there. As I was closing the door, I espied a small parcel on the floor outside. It was some ready-filled Enoxaparin hypodermics. I’m glad they sent them, just in case.

I got on the computer, and Carer Maapreet arrived. No doorbell pushed. Didn’t know she was in the flat until she came into the room. I greeted her. After clocking in on her mobile, she set out to get the medications readied. I took them, and she checked the BP figures on the NHS site. I’d made one error. Tsk! Then Manpreet got some Phorpain, well, it’s another name now, but the same thing, just not strong enough, only 10%, not the usual 20%… which also had gone down from 30%. 
It’s called Ibugel Forte, now. Massaged my lower back with it. Then both knees, Next, as she did a full body check, got barrier cream under the arms, man breasts and the right wrist. Bless her.

When Manpreet left, I went to try the Procelain Throne again.
What a session, I struggled to get it going, one giant torpedo finally agonisingly, painfully plopped out… to be followed by a great long-lasting torrent of watery mush!

I started on what was going to be an hour-long session of updating the missing word lists. Huh!
Three hours later, Carer Mirza arrived. Nice to see him. A quick visit. Painkillers and Peptac given. 

I went back to the computer to finish off the section I was on. I got carried away again and started the next one. By then, Carer Inhran was coming in.

I hastily got as much as I could on this blog. But it will be morning by the time it’s done.
Hang on, I was supposed to be cutting it down! I’ll get some spuds in the oven, and do the rest in the morning. I am a clot!

I opened the video of the seizure to show a Carer and explain the importance of not shouting or touching me. This is what happened when taking the snaps of it on the computer. (Laugh, I did!)
First effort…
The computer went into sleep mode just as I was pressing the Kodak Tim-2 button.
I tried again…
I forgot to take the flash off! Hehe!
Gave myself a solid halo.
Gorrit!

Later, I went to take a snap of the sunset. But by the time I’d found Kodad Tim-2, I was too late and missed it. Grumph!

I zoomed in to catch the last of the sun as it came around the globe.
The clouds seemed to be thickening.

Then even closer. This snap reminded me of something, but I’m blown if I can remember what it was now. Huh

Carer Ejaz is only doing the late-night call now, apart from the 2-hour Wednesday call. I do miss his help so much.
Polish sausage and potatoes, cubed and roasted, with Leicester cheese dolloped on top of them. Burnt to make the cheese crackly. One of my better cooking efforts. However, all was not good after eating this feast. I went to wash the pots and found I’d left the hot tap running; it had run cold. So I boiled some water in the kettle a few times, and left the pots and dishes to soak overnight, to be done in the morning.
I dropped the walking stick, stupidly bent down to retrieve it, and caught a wallop on the edge of the cabinet. And he had been feeling so much better and easier these last two days. Joined in immediately after the , and is still with me now, Wednesday morning 09:20hrs! 
I returned to the computer to shut it down, and as I got seated, an urgent, panicky desire to use the Porcelain Throne arose; I got up and nearly fell down again, thanks to , and hobbled hastily to the wet room. In my haste to get to the porcelain in time, again, I banged poor , this time against the door frame as I was taking off the dressing gown. Multitasking should be taken off of my agenda. On the plus side, I got down on the plastic seat in time, but only just.  
was gooey, soft, yet running? Boy, I’m going through the toilet rolls and fresh air sprays! I returned to turn off the computer… again, and did so.

But, with playing me up, getting into the old hospital bed proved too painful. So, I returned to the c1966, £300 Oxfam charity shop-bought, wincingly grotty, beige-coloured, crumb-covered from my nocturnal nibblings, itch-making, uncomfortable, positively unhealthy, and dangerous, no longer operational, virus-breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, catheter-tube-trapping recliner. 
I got the legs up on a chair, and was soon in the land of Nod! Accompanied, unfortunately, by .

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TTFNski!
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Inchie Today: Sunday 16th November 2025

/ Inchie / 6 Comments

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WELL, MAYBE NOT...
A bruise on my hand kept changing colour…
Pink, red, brown, and then into zaffre,
There was little pain; I did not suffer,
Until I gave myself another,
On the same blooming finger!

I love pigeons, when they bill & coo,
I believe I once saw a bugaboo,
I used to handwrite with a decorative curlicue, 
My bank balance is barely worth a flamfew.
My brain today is holding a hullabaloo.

In my younger days, I was an ardent angler,
Despite being bitten one day by a zander,
And slipping and falling into the water,
Now, I suffer from having verbomania,
I fear being buried… of a vivisepulture,
I hoped to see the creatures in Toowoomba,
But I remain a confirmed zoolater…

I realise in the past I’ve been negligent,
Well, I was not known as intelligent,
My mistakes & errors had no intent,
I spent many hours of regret,
Now I’m old; so many I forget!
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0420hrs: I woke up coughing, and my eyes were running… and struggling to contain the rear-end evacuation that was plainly on its escape route of its own accord.

I got the gown undone en route to the wet room and got entangled with the extra-long nocturnal catheter tubing. But, I got to the Throne in time, just!
Another messy whan-bab evacuation that was soggy and sticky. Heck of a job cleaning things up. I thought about doing ablution there and then while I was in the wet room, but decided to give it a while longer until the rotten-egg-like smell, the aroma left by the foul-smelling excrement, had cleared.
I went onto the balcony to see what the end of the car park was like. I think they must be parking to block access like this on purpose? Not that it matters to me. The white car is now parked halfway across the chevrons, with support from a blue van. I imagine they had a valid reason for this fire engine and ambulance blocking tactics. I think I could see a pool of water near the park’s entrance and exit. Maybe the tarmac has become unsafe.

Then, as the rain cleared, I could see that the uphill old gravel path had now been completely tarmacked. I’d love to walk up the hill and come down through the tree copse. But…
It doesn’t seem that long since I was walking that route every day and just loved doing it. Whatever the weather was like. No more!

I returned to the wetroom and started the ablutions. They were going much better than they did yesterday. 
The intercom sounded; it was Carer Nisra. Blimey, how time passed. Then, since I only had my PPs on when she arrived, she spotted that my man-breast would benefit from some barrier creaming, my right knee and lower back were given the Photpain Gel treatment, and my right lower keg had its strappings and undersocks taken off, ankle and leg were foamed, socks and straps put back on. Then Nirma sorted and issued the prescription medications to me. And checked the Health Check return figures on Excel for me. I always get a warm glow when Nimra calls. But then some bad news was revealed: she said she is not coming again; she has new clients to see each morning. Well, well, and that was a bit of a blow to my morale. I thanked her for her help & understanding, and bade her farewell. She took the waste bags with her. Wishing her luck, I gave her a mini-hug too. I hope that Ejaz will not be moved. Wonder who will do the morning call. This afternoon, Ejaz didn’t know about the changes. So he might not be doing it. I hope it might be Carer Carer Carer Nimra. 
I’d be properly lost if he went.
Went to get the kettle on and took this snap of the front and Chestnut Way car parking in the bays.
I was feeling a little down, but not depressed, just sad, I suppose.
Laid out before me at the kitchen window were hundreds of houses, homes, bungalows: being in my sad mode, I thought of what they were doing. There will be burglars, families at war and in love, students, Bulgarians, Irish, Indians, Pakistanis, Africans, Nigerians, Chinese, Serbians, Welsh, Scots, Poles, Ukrainians, Jews, Hungarians, Jamaicans, Myanmar, Bangladeshi, Palestinians, Libyans, etc, etc out there. Those in need, in pain, missing home, we all have one thing in common. 

No idea how long it went on, cause I had no signs that I was drifting off. But it was 17:00hrs when I came back into a world of confusion, dizziness and some loss of balance. And, unusually, I felt so tired, weary, and worn out, which had never lasted more than a few minutes after an episode. But it was enough for me to close the computer and get into bed. I was well in the land of nod, and the Carer arrived and rang the intercom. Ejaz issued the medications, tablets, & Peptac. He’ll rub some Phorpain in for me on his last speed visit. 

Nosh Preparation – Consumption & Stomach Ache! Duodenal Donald did activate!
Gobble, slurp, belch!

TTFN

Inchie Today: Monday 17th November 2025

/ Inchie / 4 Comments

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I’m fated to getting the occasional adumbration,
Like they will not go ahead with my trephination,
But that’s not going to give me any trepidation,
Nor my seizure giving me trips into oblivion,
Not my broken knee, or my fungal lesion…
Toothache Tiffany, or Cramp giving Colin…
My catheter, else my cartilages adumbration, 
Glaucoma Gladys, and not to mention…
My bowels fail and non-retention,
Or even my overnight elucubration,
Mainly, the problem is my brain’s fragmentation,
I’m thinking of becoming a futilitarian!
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No question, I’m an excellent forgetter,
And getting worse, not better,
In some ways, I’m a bit of a backslider…
Job not done, cause I don’t remember,
The job I started, when I mentally meander,
Start another, and get all a bluster…
If I get a phone call, seizure or visitor,
Then get asked what to do by a Carer,
Did anyone tell them I had Dementia?
I may go to the kitchen to cook a burger,
Go to the toilet, and, well, bugger!
Come out and start using the Hoover…
Then, back on CorelDraw on the computer,
Then it might freeze, read the brochure… 
But can’t see it, due to Gladys’ Glaucoma!
Then I smell the burning veggie-burger…
I swear, curse, become a self-belittler,
In comes a nurse to change the catheter…
Both leg strapping & socks off the Lymphorrhea,  
We have a laugh, I hold this as dear…
Off she goes, leaving me feeling sadder,
To the wetroom to empty the catheter,
I immediately saw another Inchie blunder…
I’d left the tap running, the hot water,
Now it could not have run colder!
I got even angrier and bolshier…
Leaving, I hit the doorframe with my shoulder!
Depression Darius Dawned, oh, super! 
I should write a book, could be a bestseller?
Under fiction, although true, do I care?
Near blind in my left eye, right one’s clear,
The left one’s view is cloudy and foggier,
I’ll have to inform the Doctor…
Get my eyes examined…
But each call, it’s a different Carer,
On the phone, it is hard for me to hear,
Ejaz & Nimra have been nowhere near,
When they were assured to appear…
They made life that little bit chirpier, 
Talking to the new Carer,
I detected signs of dyslexia,
Suppose because I was disconcerted,
I had to tell him he’d undermedicated,
The Warfarin, I grabbed & imbibed, 
How bad today was cannot be described.
It made me think I had cacodemonomania,
The neurologist mentioned the word cachexia,
He was talking of the effects of a seizure,
Nimra took a video of one I gave a chanticleer!
Ejaz helped me send it to the Doctor,
But no reply, nothing has been heard.
Life is getting harder, complicated, contrarier,
Each day I face enforced frustration & failure,
What can I do, can’t hear or see properly – Caramba!
Getting help? Ha! I’m a dégringolader,
With mind & body in need of many a chiropractor,
Failure, frustration, desperation & dysphoria.
Still, you don’t like to complain, do yer?
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I’m afraid that I’m going to have to cut down on this blog, seriously. For some time at least. Shame, cause I loved doing it so much. I’ll try to keep a cartoon, and an Ode, with a few words of the happenings on the day.
THE REASONS
Health and time. I’ve lost Ejaz. Other than that, I hope on a Wednesday. Nimra will not be coming again.
Carer Mizra, did one call today? I hope he can call more often, a grand help he is. Dispiriting.
Everything I do is taking so much longer.
The cock-ups, errors, and mistakes seem to be getting more frequent. In the last three days: Taps left on, remote control lost, bank and Virgin details cannot be found. Eight near tumbles (Cartilage & Dizzy Dennis). 
The video of me having a seizure was taken thanks to Nimra, and Ejaz helped me work out how to email it to the Doctor, but no reply or appointment has come back yet. The trephination, it sounded to me, like it was going to be cancelled. Fair enough. Waiting for appointments with the Eyes, Ears, Nose and Throat department. Teeth, Ears & Glaucoma; Glaucoma is getting worse in the left eye when I shut my right eye; all I can see is a blur. Not good at all. 
I’ve been fruitlessly begging for more Carers call time. Not that it is now a good thing, losing Nimra and, apart from Wednesdays, Ejaz. 
When I was in the hospital last time, the last few days, several callers half-promised me help. Social, with finances, trying to get extra Carer time (Haha!),
Help with wheelchairs, ordering food online, my computer problems, and arithmaphobia. Suggested rehousing me in a home with 24/7 assistance available. Not that my only experience of living in one after the stroke, encourages me in the least. But no one has been in touch. I’m not surprised.
Depression-Darius has me in his grasp. With the bad news about my Carers, Dizzy Dennis, Concentration Konrad and Lost Balance Belinda all rampant today, I’ve lost the will and interest.
I’ll be trying to get the word list done again; it’s such a slow job. I still can’t work out how I lost the files all in the first place… Oh, yes, the social lady said she would get me some help on that score. Hehehe! I believed her!
As for when the Doctor said they’d resuscitated me. I was gobsmacked. I can’t remember anything of being anywhere for treatment. 
That’s my moaning out of the way. Sorry.

Morning view

BP Hyper this morning!

Managed a mug of tea, before
I got carried away with words.

Carers table. Tided up by Carer
Nimra, before she left,
never to return. Sob!

Brightening up!

Floods at the end of the car park.
White car there again, oh,
and a red one too.

and kept me company all day.

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Have a good day!
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TTFNski!
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