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ODE TO CONCENTRATION KONRAD
One of my ailments is Konrad Concentration…
Not to be confused with Conrad Constipation,
Although both are ace at obstruction and prohibition,
Konrad, in control of memory blocking & recollection,
Conrad, in charge of my back passage obstruction,
Causing pain, and Haemorrhoid Harold’s bleeding,
Conrad swaps with Trotsky Terence often…
Trotsky guarantees a liquid, pongy evacuation,
It reverses the next day, rock hard, tarnation!
Concentration Konrad does not bring physical trusion.
The hassles that come from Konrad Concentration
Are mental, cognitively, unending, in perpetuation,
My responses can vary, sometimes an epiphenomenon,
A byproduct, physiological, needing explication…
Often bringing on self-expostulation,
I think that Konrad’s affects need explaining,
I see the neurosurgeon re. my upcoming trefination…
Not until November; I’ve no trepidation,
Until then, my brain is forgetting & fragmenting…
Frustrated, self-hating, waiting, with some aggression,
There are times that I’m 100% certain,
That something was done right, then became uncertain,
Change my mind again – mental vociferation,
Did I know, then, how if so? Flashforwarding…
These instances can involve anything,
Appointments, dates, and times – do I get fussbudgeting?
Not knowing leads to self-vilification and condemnation,
I am mentally challenged, FND, or maybe a vaurien?
Three years ago, a psychiatrist mentioned verbigeration,
What does it mean? I looked it up, but I’ve forgotten,
I must do it again. Will I? Here’s hoping,
Last night, I gazed out at the gloaming…
Something weird was beginning,
I left my body and floated up to look back down at me…
I was there, but I looked to be about three,
No more memory of what happened, you see,
Suddenly, I was in the hospital having an angiography,
Then back in the wet room, emptying my pouch of pee!
The door chime chimed, rudely waking me,
I wish an oneirocritic would analyse this for me!
BONUS ODE
If a politician lied, can it be called insinuated?
Or, claim it’s proposed, suggested, even adumbrated,
Can Starmer’s lies by omission be shrouded?
I think he should be hanged or guillotined,
He’s a reprobate, immoral, degenerated,
SpecSavers, Arsenal, Sausages & hostagers,
To taking backhanders, he is not averse,
Robbing, fiddling, killing pensioners, & farmers,
Backhanders? Arsenal, glasses,
For his wife, designer outfits,
Lord Alli gave £500,000+ to Labour over 20 years,
Corporate box: by Arsenal valued at 8,950 pounds,
40 sets of free tickets during his time as leader,
£698 of Coldplay tickets in Manchester,
£4,000 of hospitality at a Taylor Swift concert,
Accommodation valued at more than 20,000 pounds, Glasses valued at £2,485 pounds,
£4,475 of discounted personal training sessions,
A free £4,500 holiday to Welsh beauty spots,
£5000+ from various gastronomers,
A suggestion of hidden gifts of beverages!
Wouldn’t surprise me to see MP abscotchalaters,
Keir’s not exactly surrounded by MP artificers,
Or honest, reliable HMG inspectrices,
I hope Starmer doesn’t miss any Arsenal fixtures,
Hope the git doesn’t get any snottier,
I hope he gets even more unpopular,
And meets his own assasinator,
If not, he dies of gonorrhoea.
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Catching up.
That’s that done.
Well, look at this…
YEE-HAA!
Mind you, DDDDD took over again
around teatime. Humph!
05:20hrs: I reluctantly dragged myself, still feeling tired out, from the bed.
Got the nocturnal pouch emptied. I took a sample first, so the Carer could grade it later.
I took this snap above of the misty,
but tickling with rain, morning.
Carer Ejaz arrived. Sorted the medications and issued them. Then, the lad performed a body check, applying Cetraben cream to the areas that needed it.
He checked Lymphoreoa Leslie’s leg wound and said he would change it on Monday if it got any worse. I thought it was fine, apart from the neuropathy-driven electric shocks being more regular today. I put this down to the patch dropping off so regularly; Mizra had put tape on it to keep it in place. Ejaz changed his mind and applied a new patch, retaping it firmly in place. Seconds later, the body fluid could be seen leaking under the plaster. As expected, with the tape being tight, but it’s better than the plaster falling off. Don’t worry, the nurse is due on Monday or Tuesday. I’m dreading Wednesday’s medical day. I may have to miss blogs off. But not if I can help it.
Ejaz then creamed the hand injury, & took a photograph of it. It looks a lot worse than it really is in this snap. It’s drying up and scabbing now, which is a good sign, methinks.
A few hours on the blog, and the food delivery arrived. I retrieved the bags from where they were left in the foyer, carried them to the kitchen, and put them away. Got some garden peas.
I’ll have a super choice tonight.
I did have a bit of an Accifaupas, though.
I caught the hand wound as I
was putting things in the fridge.
Nothing really, wiped it with a tissue,
and it stopped bleeding.
Carer Mizra called, or was it Carer
Akeyo? I’m going out of it again here.
I took another sky shot.
I’ll have to take a stand-up shave and wash now.
Still can’t have a shower cause of the leg.
Back in a bit. I’ll try to rush it (not the shaving
bit). To get it done before the next Carer call.
All done and eaten!
Carer Mizra did the last call. I performed safety checks in the kitchen and fitted the night catheter bag. The lad looked tired; I was his last call.
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Be Good, Be Well, & Bless You!
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05:20hrs: I shot out of bed and leapt over the second-hand shop bought nine years ago for £300, c1966, discomfiting, alarmingly beige-coloured, crumb-containing, TV remote hiding, not working recliner. Doing a backward summersault, landing face down, and after doing a few hundred press-ups… 
I inched my legs off of the bed. The catheter contraption straps were painful this morning. I detached the nocturnal catheter bag and rose rather too quickly to get the 
initially. But I got sidetracked when I saw the amazingly clear sky. I got Kodak Tim Two and took this snap of the clouds. 
Then, I took another wider shot. The Sun was already beginning to come through from behind and causing a mist on the horison.
mess before applying the barrier cream. I cleaned the few teeth I had left and used the mouthwash. I then realised I had not put in the hearing aids. So, I went to fetch and fit them to see if anyone should call early. With the hearing aids in, I heard a strange noise from the kitchen—a tinkling sound.
Yee Gods! The fourth time in three days! Grrr!
worse, so no complaints.
ed my armpits, underneath my man breasts and groin, paying careful attention to SOSTH (Spanish Onion 
Sized Testicle Henry). Below my bulging belly, my still bleeding rear-end sternum. Germolened both ankle ulcers. Then, I got new straps onto the catheter contraption. Barrier 
creamed them before fitting. Then I tackled 
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I’m using the new-to-me Terbinafine hydrochloride cream. I’m also applying the new dropper before the much-feared pain of rubbing it in 
I can assure you that it was thrown in the waste bin! I’ll never use that again! I shall stick with Betamethasone in the future, even if I have to 
buy it
Protection Pants on was the usual farce. Do they make anything similar to the ones on the right here? It’s suitable that I should put him on the right. Because he’s the most Tory-like Labour Prime Minister ever! Hahaha!
As I noticed the Prison alarm was flashing last night, I didn’t expect to see it again this morning. 
The lad listened. He then sorted out my NHS breakfast.
Carer Ejaz made the next call. Socks taken off. Medications were issued. We had a little natter, and he was in a rush but asked if he could take my photo with my sunglasses on. Well, ever the budding model, I agreed. A handsome-looking brute! Hahaha!
I showed my prepared-earlier nosh in the microwave pot. Ejaz took a photo of that as well! He shot off after that.
Amazing Night Glow!
Then, a closer shot.
The Morrisons bread rolls were tasteless and tough.
Cheers, Each!
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The result was I gave myself a bloody nose by losing my balance as I bent down to open the Catheter Valve yesterday. Then, while wiping the flow from my nasal holes, I started my cracked lips bleeding. I rather hope that they do not start again today! (They did!)
talking to me, but I was not receptive and unable to. 
As soon as Richard departed, I got the kettle on. Taking this photo from the kitchen window of morning view. Feeling more myself all the time.
after drinking the small mug of tea and getting the computer on, the day bag filled almost to the maximum. In fact, it was the backflow discomfort that made me aware of its need to be emptied again. Not only that but in the jug was nearly 800ml of waste water! I think this happened yesterday as well. It continued to fill up all day, but not as much as this one. In the middle of this emptying, no spillages!
I didn’t mention this but decided, as it had happened, I would. I had to scoot off to the wet room to use 
the Porcelain Throne when Richard was here. 
,
I collated the waste bags into one and placed it near the front door. 
I’d hit the catheter day bag, a decent wallop with the edge of the door. I laughed it off and returned to the main junk room to get the computer back on and update the blog. I would think it was about eight to ten minutes later that I realised that urine from the pouch was trickling down my leg! Once more, the sock, leg, foot and slipper had been self-unrinated on with great venom! 
Such shame, disgrace, ignominy, humiliation, and indignity!
When I zoomed in to take this picture from the kitchenette window, I got a sense that something was wrong or not right. Different somehow compared with yesterday’s viewing. I spent a ridiculous amount of time and kept returning to look with the naked eye. Was it just that the sun had sneaked through, lighting up the scene? I’d enough to worry about as it was, but this bugged me. I gave up and got on the computer. 
I went to make a brew of Glengettie and took this snap of the sky on offer. Then, it dawned on me what the difference was in the previous photo.
Imitation fish sticks, potato chunks, sliced bread with a bit of Marmite. Followed by a pot of jelly with three small pieces of satsuma in it. Very nice! This year, for Christmas lunch, inmates at His Majesties Prison New Hall will get to choose from Moroccan vegan roast, Salmon & dill fishcake, Roast turkey with pigs in blankets, and sage and onion stuffing with complete trimmings. Christmas pudding (vegan option), ice cream, Swiss Roll or banana & custard. For free, of course.
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Ah, a bit better colour!
Terrible photo!
Waste bags condensed.
Evening mug of Glengettie tea.
Blue evening views
Note the deliberate spelling mistake? Ahem!
Gawd, I hate Starmer!
A large rise in cases percentage-wise!
I did a bit of research later for the odd below above!
All was normal here.
Slightly darker this morning.
My morning shots are getting atrocious!
Yesterday, I, Sherlock Holmesianly, searched for the signs of which houses are growing Cannabis in their lofts.
Today, it became apparent. Hehehe!
I’m unsure how I did it, but I got the battery-powered can opener to work!
Snowgoinger! Haha!
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Morning views.
Took these close-ups of the local residences.
It’s challenging to master cooking in a microwave.
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Another crap, waking up all the time all night. I shot awake so often that I believed it was late and forced myself out of bed, emptied the nocturnal catheter 
bag, and dragged myself miserably to the wet room. A quick clean-up: Cartilage tormentedly got the fresh PPs on and returned to the bed to tidy it up. All the time, I try not to think of the computer hassles and problems. It’s getting to me now! Then I had to go back to the wet room. Cor, what a messy job that was!
I got the computer on, and of course, it was not letting me put photos or graphics on again. I joke not. Carer Chris arrived. I was too responsive. With my fingers crossed, I was using Norton and Ccleaner to make space on the computer. After they were done, I should have closed everything down and rebooted for the changes to take effect. I was trying to concentrate on what I’d done and what needed doing. Carer Chris took the laundry down for me on his way out, and I returned to the in-progress cock-up I was unknowingly in the middle of. 
Then I noticed the time on the clock was 09:00hrs! It had taken me hours to get things going! Grumble-Grunts!
It took me about half an hour to get it to work. It was all a matter of blind faith, hope, and keeping my fingers crossed, jobbie.
I took a break to think things through and see if I could figure out if I had done something wrong. I went into the kitchen and took some more sky shots, then back to the computer and inserted the SD card once more into the reader. And it loaded straight away? Phew!
midday call. I must have gotten up this morning around 05:00 hrs. Then I remembered taking a photo of the ancient clock using the other camera. I got the SD card, and it went through. The clock depicted 04:30 hrs when I pressed the day and date buttons. I realised I struggled with the computer’s memory for around five hours or more! Taking an hour of for the ablutionings and pant changes. Huh!
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We were having a heyday with me. These persisted from when I got up to when I 
; As for him, he didn’t give me a break at all; he’d moved in permanently. 
Too dark!
Not sure when this was taken. Not many photos were taken this morning.
Presumably, he took these before and after the ablutions. The old man got up so late that he had to do them late, around 17:00 hrs. But why did he? 
Evening snap.
Two ready-made meals in one large bowl!
Of course, I couldn’t; the lightning was gone when I hit the take-button, it had gone.
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05:10hrs: I woke up in the 966, £300 Oxfam charity shop bought, second-hand, wincingly grotty, beige coloured, crumb-covered from my nocturnal nibblings, itch-making, uncomfortable, positively unhealthy & dangerous, no longer 
operational, virus-breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, Catheter-tube-trapping, recliner.
pouch. Again, a decent colour of urine had been passed overnight.
The spray was almost spitting-like, out all over the WC furniture and my bum and bottom. Took me ages to get it all cleaned up.
My plump, short legs were holding up the catheter bag pouch well today. Then, the bag suddenly split open down one side. Being a cunning, if pathetic DIYer, I repaired it with some of the Elastoplast and Elephant tape I had to hand and 
refitted it.
& 
One: As I turned away to take the filled bottles, I knocked the topless disinfectant bottle off the draining board. I made a barb for it and sprayed the liquid out of the spout. It landed on my dressing gown, which got soaked. Then I dropped the bottle on the floor, which swizzled around, distributing the rest of its contents over the kitchen floor. I did not burst into tears! I just cursed vigorously. But I did consider crying an option! I decided to take some shots from the window, as not many had been taken with all the seizures. I genuinely wish that I hadn’t bothered now.
I set about cleaning the kitchenette floor again.
Things are looking better now in the kitchen.
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Or it might have been Carer Victor or Israel. Erm, if I remember correctly, I’ll reveal it all on Monday.
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It was not an extraordinary sort of day, with a few intermittent happenings that were out of the ordinary. I can’t recall having a single 
, no, honestly! A carer failed to arrive for the midday checks, which was not all that unexpected; last Monday, a morning medication Carer failed to arrive. The ailments and injuries were, as usual, ever-present.
, or of course it may have been 
, added up to three. This seems to be the agreed count these last few days, with my brain taking over masters 
in conjunction.
For some unknown reason, the burn on the right hand of the oven rack is taking a while to stop being painful. Constipation Conrad is back in charge of the evacuations. My concentration is no worse than yesterday. Not that that’s saying much. I think Concentration Konrad is now a permanent fixture. He joins the other ailments as a part of the Mysteries of Woodthorpe Court, with the hobgoblins, spectres, gnomai, phantasms, ghosts, the grotesque succubae, extraterrestrials, ectoplasms, spirits, or the Fata Morganas, that have been sent to taunt, irritate and terminate my already limited saneness of mind, which is losing its marbles?
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I think I saw a speck of blood in the bag this morning when I photo’d it. Likely, it’s just a reflection from the flash, I assumed?
Much drizzle is out there from the balcony’s right window. The usual excellent parking is available from our senior citizens on the yellow chevrons, indicating, do not park here. I’m not jealous that the drivers can still afford to own one. Or that my licence had to be surrendered due to the ailments making me unsafe on the roads. 
Har, Har! 
Boy, I’ve waffled on here! Sorry.
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Pants and slippers on again, I meandered out onto the balcony. The rain was still pouring down.
snaps. They were not very good, taken through the window glass. 
There followed an almost rapid selection of 
dressing gown when cleaning things up. Humph!
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To the rescue again. He found the hearing aids within minutes. He’s a very good ferriter. While he was searching, he spotted some biscuits, and he had to have a packet. Hehehe! They had dropped behind the rickety 1962 G-Plan cabinet, and he retrieved them for me. Saved again! 
The evening sky kept changing hue. Well, I thought it did, anyway. Of course, what my eyes see and you may not do… 
vegetable dumpling stew… mixed, unclear and lumpy.
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