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Being reigning ineptitude champion didn’t come easily,
You need a brain that is damaged, architectonically,
I had help when I was born, my Mother dropped me,
Told the midwife she doesn’t want it, throw it away,
That’s how my life started. I’m still unlucky today,
Within a week, we had to move; the rent we couldn’t pay,
My being another mouth to feed led Mother to inequity,
We moved to the Meadows, ruled by the ochlocracy,
Got thrown into a canal, rescued by the constabulary
Chopped my thumb in half, terribly bloody…
My eyesight was getting misty and foggy,
Then started feeling dizzy and groggy,
Dad said I’ll not use cash unwarrantedly,
Had to have a tonsillectomy & appendectomy,
Dad pulled my teeth with his pliers for free,
The opticians, I never got to see…
Well, I did ten years later in 1973,
School? I learnt nothing much, educationally,
I used obliquity to ensure survivability,
The school joker, the idiot… well, it fitted Inchy,
A false face, I’m not afraid, acting bravely…
But my underpants often got messy,
Tried to avoid beatings using comedy,
Got a part-time job as a gas lamp lighter/snuffer,
I left school at fourteen. What would life proffer?
I moved on to work as a vanlad, come labourer,
I started at a Bulwell factory as a van-lad deliverer,
I soon realised that in life I was an amateur,
A drifter, unconfident, nervous & no glitter,
Dental bother with a bleeding alveolar,
I earnt £3-3-0 for a weekly defrayal,
1962, when smoking & drinking were not punishable,
A pint when drinking was no trouble,
Tory PM Macmillan made taxes attenuable,
The year of the birth of Starmer, the adumbral,
Comparing them, Starmer, who’s dishonest & cruel,
I’d pay someone to kill the fool,
But I don’t have the wherewithal,
I think this Ode is one of my most wackadoodle!
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No carers are available to take photos today. So, there are none, or they have been used before. (A little like me… Hehehe) I created the above graphics with CorelDraw (the crashing programme) and they turned out okay.
Plus, besides and as well as that. The Paramedics were called to come and treat me again!
It’s already so late in the day. The medical tests delayed me for ages, I bashed my head again; that’s why the Carer called the ambulance, when she spotted the original wound was bleeding. The Carres send a message to HQ after each visit, and it was the ICC boss lady who called them.
It’s been so long since I could get around to the writing part of this blog that I am relying on the scribbled notes from the pad. There are a lot of them, but just glancing at it, much of it is unreadable, so, no guessing, I’ll leave them off, so as not to confuse you or myself when I read this later.
Glaucoma, Gladys, delayed me further when I walked into the kitchen to make a brew of Thompson’s Punjana tea, and the direct sunlight hit my eyes. I was virtually blinded for about ten minutes. But still struggled and made myself a brew… scalding my thumb as I poured the water from the kettle! Finger under the cold water tap for a long time, then washed the sink, and put some Savlon on the digit. Leaving the flipping hot water tap running while I had some R&R for the eyes to recover. The water was stone cold! So, no shaving or showering again! I must look awfully rough-faced. In other words, I need to get a shave and shower after the water reheats on the nighttime economy thingamajig. Knowing full well that I’ll never get to do it tonight, cause the fatigue is already coming over me. Leaving me annoyed, as tomorrow is a busy day.
Carer Nimra told me she is doing the long call tomorrow, which is her first time. So, how can I find time for a shower & shave? I’ll have to go down to show her the ropes, where the laundry room is, how the machines operate and the timing. If a machine is not free, we’ll be buggered. Because then I won’t get the washing done, as the Carers have a limited time allocated. Often, the Carer is too busy to dry the washing and brings it back damp and wet. Which means hanging it all up in two rooms, to fully dry, and I have to hang it, remember it, and I’ve depressed myself at the very thought of this scenario happening again.
It’s not Carer Nimra at fault. I could do with getting more time allotted for a Wednesday, but, of course, can I afford it anyway? The simple answer is no, which I can’t. This adds to the depths of Darius.
I think today has been so busy that he couldn’t get through earlier. Hahaha!
I rose late, about 06:30 hours. I worked out that again I had had a nocturnal sleep-seizure. Because all the feelings and sensations were with me the instant that I stirred. Fogginess, confusion, insufficient balance and a refusal from the brain to respond to my wants and needs. I went nowhere after removing the night catheter bag. And, getting it off caused a hell of a pain from the head wound as I bent down. It’s been like this all day each time I bent to empty the day bag, it catches me unprepared, but later in the day I started remembering and took thing as slowly as I could, but in the end the pained with head down made me change tack, now I’m rushing it to get it over with each time. Trust me to be wearing a mini-day bag, which needs emptying more often! Not bending down, and the head is fine. The pain is emanating directly from underneath the wound itself. I should have told the Paramedics about this… then again, maybe I did, and forgot.
I was washing the tray from last night’s meal, and the intercom chimed. It was Carer Nimra; I let her in the foyer, and then I returned to finish the tray cleaning. 
I knocked over the walking stick, bent to retrieve it, the head would hurt, and I stood up too quickly and struck the head wound against the edge of the sink. I opened the flat door to let Nimra in, and she spotted that the wound was bleeding. Not a lot, though. She also said I looked very pale and asked if I needed an ambulance. Some unreadable words on the notepad here, sorry. While we were conversing, I was interrupted by struggling to find the words and 
. I think I was either waffling on or repeating myself, according to the notes. Nimra got my diabetic socks on, issued the medications, Phorpain gelled Cartilade Chloe, and departed, farewell exchanged.
The intercom burst forth with its jingle. I saw on the panel it was two paramedics seeking admission, so let them in.
I’d already completed yesterday’s blog post and posted it of to WordPress. And the landline burst into life.
It was from the boss lady at ICC. Inner-City-Care.
Telling me that paramedics are on their way. She must have read the report from Nimra and called them. Then, while I was on the phone, the medics arrived. And asked the usual series of questions. I pointed out my embarrassment at their being called. The tests were carried out while I answered the questions. After a long time and many tests, they handed me a written suggestion note and said cheerio. The note they left was photographed by Nimra later, along with a photo she took from the balcony for me.
It’s hard to read, but Carer Nimra read this out to me. Here’s how I decipher it now:
Specific Advice and Red Flags;
If any further falls, head injuries or any red flags occur, call 999.
Take it steady today.
Call 999 for.
Loss of consciousness.
Confusion.
Severe headaches.
Seizures lasting longer than usual.
Vomiting – Blurred Vision.
I’m living with confusion all day, every day.
Severe headaches – each time I bend down, even to empty the catheter pouch, but they ease as soon as I get stood upright again.
Glaucoma Gladys ensures the blurred vision.
Can’t win, can I? Har-har!
When the paramedics left, I tried to call ICC to let them know, and the landline chirruped.
I removed some food from the order that is due to be delivered tomorrow morning.
👩🏻⚕️ DVT-Warfarin nurse Christina rang. Bless her, she’s so kind to let me know when she’s coming.
She is due between nine and eleven in the morning. It’s going to be a busy day again on Wednesday. There’s so much to get done, but so little time to do it. Frustrated? Me?
Absobloodylutely!
I can’t get any food done yet. Until the last Carer arrives. I can put the oven on, though. Then it should be quicker to warm up after the visit is done. Blow it, I’ll make a start now, they could be here any minute or another hour.
Well, that worked well. The Carer took and sent me snaps of the pathetic as-it-turned-out tasting meal, and views from the kitchen window. I thank you!
View.
A poor do this one was.
Potatoes were bitter-tasting.
The tomatoes in the no-butter-buttered bread sarnies were even more insipid.
The sausage’s flavour was indescribable.
SHAME!
The night’s sleep was full of jerking awakes.
And occasionally 
were the guilty ailments. Later in the morning, 
had few twinges to release. Late morning, around 03:00hrs, they all suddenly stopped, and I had a great three more hours of blissful rest.
And when I woke up at 0600hrs, I noticed the absence of seizure after-effects. The previous two nights, I’m sure I had nocturnal seizures. Thankfully, none tonight, though.
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MAY YOUR DAY GO GRRREAT!
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =
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lurking in both knees. Wondering why, after all the harassment over the last two days, should the one ailment that has been absent all last week, suddenly start on the rampage? Within, I imagine two minutes of nodding back into dreamland, 
twitched; so violently, just the once. But it was enough to make me force my way out of bed, take off the nocturnal catheter pouch, and go in search of Codeine to ease the pain. This has never happened before; not the neck twitching, but the pain being so sharp. I’m assuming that it may have 
been caused by not getting medication for the days while in the hospital. What do you think? I left the card nearby with the bag, so the Carer can assess the colour for me.
finding I’d left the oven on was not encouraging.
The first task was to utilise the Porcelain Throne. But, for the third day on the trot, no evacuation was passed! A fair bit of noisy wind escaped, but not a sausage. Nothing, ziltch, nada or a blank. The shave was bloodless. Great!
, 
for a few minutes, knowing that my precious nurse was with me. Have I fallen in love at my age, and in my current physical & mental state?
Some fonts didn’t load, so I had to select substitutes, which may cause problems in earlier postings.
just had time to take two photos for me. One of the fantastic sun-going-down view, so fiery and colourful, from the kitchen window. Then he snapped my much-improved Lymphorrea Leslie legs. Don’t they look so 
much better now my new love
Dry bread, tomato sarnies.
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You’ll be guaranteed, falls, accidents, the odd blip,
A Grand Morning. No, Ejaz, though.
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My grasp of the ungraspable,
I was up and about (feeling deeply vague) when I realised that it was 03:55hrs. I recall what I was doing and what I was thinking at the time. Oh, yes, I was sitting on the 
Porcelain Throne, painfully forcing some movement from the evacuating monster torpedo! Through sheer willpower and determination, I’d freed myself of that 15-inch torpedo within 15 minutes 
!
be hand-washed and hung to dry. So, I hung them up on a coat hanger above the sink. (The nurse who came later was kind enough to take this photo and email it to me. I found it on my return from the hospital on Sunday morning.) This is when I stood back from reaching up to the bar and took the tumble.
ARRIVAL AT THE QMC
Twenty minutes later, I was collected and taken to the QMC Emergency Department surgical unit, in the Outpatients Department, in the blue zone, N4 area, and given a whole brain CT scan. I think they found one. Haha! 
Then back to the Emergency CT ward. I was locked up, never to move again, until I was freed. And some 20 hours of misery awaited me. 
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Humph! A bit of a mind blank here. I can’t recall getting into my flat! But once inside, the heat in there scared me to death! I hastened to the obvious place the heat was coming from, the kitchen, and found that I had not, as I thought I had, turned off the stove, and it had overheated the place. No signs of damage were found. t must have been on a low heat level. But it could have been dangerous leaving it for all that time. Blimey, I could have easily caused a fire. What a Silly Stupid Iriot!
I DID… NOTHING! ehehe! Tsk!
Carer Mirzra snapped the outdated calendar clock. Then he made the necessary changes and adjustments for me.
It may have been from Ejaz from last week. I can recall us looking at the partial moon. Ejaz must have snapped it for me and forgot to send it earlier? Thanks, mate.
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Sunset
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Eye eye, what’s going on here?
Nocturnal catheter pouch.
Balcony walking aids.
The cartilages were dodgy all day.
Photo from 2022.
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Gone is my logic, I’m no longer systematical,
started to have a go at me when I freed myself of the clutches of the bed and bent down to release the nocturnal pouch from the catheter. Then I realised a Eureka moment was taking place. For the first time ever, I’d woken up with 
.
I changed the dates on the calendar clock. And used some toothache spray as the Toothache Tiffany kicked off.
facilities. Then, I sorted out 
the ablutions and medication. Even 
it’s made of in the book. Soylent Green is introduced as being made of plankton, but as the film unfolds, the main character discovers that it’s manufactured from dead bodies. It was released in 1973. Starring Charlton Heston & Edward G Robinson. I recall thinking it was a relatively slow film, and politicians would never do anything like that. (Back in 1973) Now we have Herr Starmer, and Oligarch leaders, Murdering Putin & La-La Criminal Trump in charge. So… 
Replaced 
After the girl left, I took a photo from the balcony on the right end. The mudslide looked thicker than usual this morning. 
Did heavy rain & wind play a part yesterday
investigate, taking the long picker-upperer with me. I was astounded when I recognised it. It was a bottle of eau de cologne. I bought this eight years ago, from the Poundshop on Upper Parliament Street. But managed to lose it. It was down there all that time. Shows how the cleaner or Carer is not good at cleaning.
Back on today’s blog.
Mild Vegetarian Curry,
Speedy sunset tonight.
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A fair young maiden granted a date with Inchie,
the longer lever, which has a 50% wobble. Checked the kitchen for safety, and went off to the Porcelain Throne evacuation. Trotsky Terence was in charge again. This time, dark brown, gooey and messy. The cleaning-up time was longer than the evacuation time, yet again.
I washed my dandies, emptied the urine pouch, and went into the kitchen to bag things. Taking this scene of the morning view. Not as pretty as yesterday’s. No pink in it at all.
Back in the kitchen, I put the waste bin bag into the big bag. 
In the balcony room, I changed the calendar clock and inserted the hearing aids into my earholes. And I realised I’dn’t altered the month; it was still July showing. I’d have thought someone would have noticed it. I got in a pickle last month with using the dates from this clock. Hehehe! I asked Ejaz to keep an eye on it. 
The first one taken straight ahead, zoomed on the dwellings, drug dealers and growers, muggers, pickpockets and unemployed, immigrants, scroungers, drug gangs, freed burglars, murderers & child molesters on parole. But I’d sooner live here than anywhere near the biggest crook, liar, and unprincipled, corrupt, immoral, unscrupulous, dishonest, evil-intentioned, dishonourable, splenetic, nefarious, fiendish, detestable, deceitful, insincere, criminal, unethical, miscreant, and merciless, debased, ruthless, heartless, sepulchral, gut-churning, sick-making, murderer-freeing ex-barrister, 
The 2nd snap of Citrus Walk’s end car parking area. And the parking on the chevrons by the little red car. Haha!
area of the right leg. This was followed by several small electric shocks shooting up the leg. I asked him to pull the sock down to have a look. He said some liquid is leaking through the skin. Ejaz applied barrier cream to it. We noticed after, and a small piece of skin was on the carpet, just an inch or so. 
The left cartilage was still swollen. And the unmistakable pain from Arthur Itis joined in.
I took a snap from the kitchen of the windows. I forecast that it will be raining soon. Arthur Itis coming on is a sign of that. Back to the front room, and took another snap from 
the computer desk… well, the 1963-built, falling to pieces, tatty, scuffed, Hopewell’s E-Plan Sideboard, with the doors falling off, to be more precise. Haha!
The wheelchair was soaked, as were the four and three-wheeled walkers! The gaps between the windows were how the rain got in. Again, it was coming from the East. The rain, I mean. 
The wind seemed to be churning in from all directions. Howling again. The rain is now worse than ever, and the wind seems to have died down a smidge. At least it’s not so noisy.
Huh, minutes later, the wind was back. Blowing the trees and branches around as if they were made of paper.
a snap of the sunshine. But no. The rain had started again. So I took shots of the rain from inside. One from the left window, and the second one 
om the right window.
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04:30hrs: The flow-back pains from the dodgy catheter day contraption were stinging away when I woke up. The nocturnal pouch was barely damp; there was so little urine in it! The first thing was to dismount the hospital bed and investigate. 
tackled. With a 
was in. 
Well, a mega-change from this morning’s evacuation, I must say.
. But not liquified and all over in seconds, as the last three visits have been. Small cubes hit the water without much splashing. Green and Oxo-shaped.
I left off doing poor Little Inchy’s Fungal lesion treatment. Until I’d sorted
Then, I did the other regulars; Ears oiled, eye drops in, Phorpain gelled 
Arthur Itis’s knees, then 
.
You can see the swelling on the left knee. This is partly due to Arthur Itis, and Cartilage Carol, with Cartilage Chleo in support, who have mangled the knee areas of both legs. The darned Little monkeys!
I finished in the wet room and took a snap through the open window of the stunning light blue and pink sky. Nice!
I hobbled into the front room, collected the bins from the wet room & kitchen, and then got everything sorted.
Carer Ejaz arrived in a good mood. He did a good jon helping me this morning. I felt a smidge guilty in keeping him longer than he should have, and was nervous of missing the bus when he shot off. He’s to make the last call; I hope he catches the bus in time.
I revisited the Porcelain Throne. It was a short visit. Nothing happened.
dawned.
Anne Gyna visited as I started to imbibe the meal.
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and or
regions, but needed the use of the Porcelain Throne.
which I cannot recall all the Whoopsiedangleplops I had. 
The intercom chirped up again. It was the chap with the Iceland order to deliver. He was soon up at the flat.
He put the things into the kitchenette for me in no time. Thanked him.
.
Just one bag of the Harry-Ramsdens frozen chips that had to go in the freezer, and I had to do some jiggling with the goods in there to make room for the tiger rolls.
the other nurses’ & Carers’ nibble selection on the carers’ table.
Earlier, I got the calendar clock updated. I missed the photo off, 
I also forgot these, taken from the balcony.
The intercom chimed again.
Despite how I was feeling, I still enjoyed this delightfully tasty meal.
I was working on CorelDRAW and felt a dampness on the Catheter leg. I investigate. 