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A NEW AILMENT
I was sitting there, having a drink of Zinfandel,
I was depressed but not feeling suicidal,
Admittedly, I was finding life barely wadeable,
But why was I now thinking so depressional?
I need to cheer up but lack the wherewithal,
I’d gone from singing to feeling vincible…
I didn’t feel a part of anything tellural,
Then I’d turn all phlegmatic and stoical.
What had changed? Guilt, now I feel sacral,
Suddenly tired, so tired, feeling sardonical,
Accepting that life is but ephemeral…
High Horis visiting is so enjoyable…
Depression Duncan returns, he’s unshakeable,
But why? It’s all unanalysable,
Keeping calm may be advisable,
Arguing with myself again, I must be tactful,
PN hinders thought and movement transferral,
Doreen Dementia is also not terminatable,
High Horis returns! Seemingly therapeutical,
Mini-seizures; sometimes things get threnetical,
Ailments can prevent stuff from being doable…
Problems mental and physical,
What I’m going to say may sound unbelievable…
In a High Horis, life seems incredible…
The sensation I had was execrable…
I floated out of my body, extrinsical…
I looked at myself, existential…
A chance, of course, this could be dubitable
Which gave me a theme for this doggerel,
Are these events possible or circumstantial?
With my mental ailments, possibly corporeal?
Another seizure then found a new carbuncle,
In a rear area just below my belt buckle!
As bad as things are, I still had to chuckle!
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03:10hrs: I bounded out of bed, somersaulted over the c1966, £300 charity shop bought second-hand, wincingly grotty, beige coloured, not working, crumb-covered from the nocturnal nibbling, itch-making, uncomfortable, virus-breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, recliner, landing safely by genuflecting my knees at the perfect time. Yodelled, and…
Oh, well, alright then…
03:10hrs: I struggled to remove the nocturnal catheter pouch from the day bag. Then, I struggled even more to get my legs off the bed, knocking my walking stick over (I’ll get it in the neck for making noise this early from Marie, who lives below, next time I see her!), as both Cartilages and Arthur Itis didn’t seem to appreciate my sleeping in the hospital bed and were giving me some gip. I sang out as I stubbed my toe on the Ottoman… Twice!
I took this snap while checking the taps, fridge, and freezer in the kitchen to ensure I hadn’t left anything out of order. No doors are left open, windows are closed, and cookers are turned off.
This session took well over two hours. There were a couple of things that went well. I can’t recall them at this moment cause so many went wrong!
The first thing I tackled was pouring jugs of hot water, washing-up liquid, and Dettol into the grey bowl that my plates of meat fit into. To soak/wash them while doing my 
teeth and shaving. Which I did, and cleaned my painful, going rapidly-rotten teeth. My mistake was forgetting about the bowl with my feet in it and reaching for the Toothache Spray. I tipped the bowl, and water spread 
all over the floor! Still, I had clean feet. I also cleaned up the floor. It’s not easy with a mop, bucket and walking stick in tow. I also had a third stubbing of the toes. 
What can I say? Maybe Arrgh? Finally, I got back to do the shaving. Three tiny cuts underneath the chin, neck and nose. How I cut myself on my nose will remain a mystery. Nobody knows! I stopped the bleeding with the Brut aftershave. It stings a little but does the job.
I had to use them 
before starting the medicationings.
Constipation Conrad ruled absolute this morning. It was pure agony.
I tried to expedite the process, but the evacuation was very slow going. My head was going dizzy with the pain and effort needed to encourage some movement. Eventually, the motion began, but it got stuck part-way!
Oh, what a painful morning!
I felt like I’d been on the toilet for an hour or more.
Suddenly, but oh, so slowly, the torpedo, it felt more like a submarine, quarter-inched its way out.
It plonked into the bowl with a thud.
There was a fair bit of blood!
From 
, well, there would.
I then washed, antiseptically cleaned, and applied cream to the affected area. Doing it over again with some Germoloid Ointment.
More precious time was lost. However, the washing and medications did nothing to ease my situation. It was almost Lovely!
Then, I made a brave decision. (Yes!) Little Inchies Fungal Lesion would be done next! Get more pain out of the way. I usually leave it until last, as it is the most painful one to do.
Ugleklump! Cragnackles! That hurt!
I did both eye sprays. Then, after cleaning the ears, I inserted the olive oil into each channel. A nasal spray was squirted up both sides. Then, another challenging task was undertaken. 
Needed the Barrier cream to be put on the right ankle. The left ankle was not leaking. A simple enough job – but reaching down to apply it was the problem. It was entirely overcome by my cunning use of paper towels dabbed, and the 
small plastic Picker-Upper was used to apply it. It wasn’t exactly pain-free, but it was bearable.
Oh, I am good! Hehe!
I’ve been using this graphic of the small picker-upperer on and off for years. I’ve only just noticed that I had spelt ‘picker’ wrongly. Tsk!
7:00hrs: I got two potatoes out, ready to go into the slow cooker later on. Of course, I forgot all about them; they had shrivelled a bit, and I threw them away, opting for frozen mini-roast spuds instead. I spotted the tubers on the counter around 21:00hrs.
Carer Ejaz made the first call of the day. Diabetic socks and medications were sorted out.
Daytime photos taken.
The clouds grew thicker.
It got hazier.
Then, it cleared a little.
Brightened up a smidgeon.
Struggled with updating the Friday post.
Well into teatime before I’d got it done.
Today, the above Ode cost me a few hours. Chiefly due to repeated mini-seizures and my mind wandering, I found myself scripting while I was out of it. So many corrections to be made. I may have missed some as the fog dawned in my head.
I got carried away searching for an old photo of myself to use on a future blog. More hours lost.
I spent too long thinking of and getting the photos cleaned up a smidgen; here they are.
c1951.
Then I took one taken earlier this year.
2025.
This sent me off on an unpleasant tangent.
Guilt and shame showered over me for my past actions. However, it clarified the reason for my bad luck and the mental and physical pains I now experience. Truth is, I deserve them. This afternoon, I found myself unself-pitiable.
A kind of freedom lingered, of acceptability.
I hope I can experience this feeling of peace again.
Carer Mizra did the second call. Confusion over medications. Mizra’s second time of calling. She put the socks on and creamed the right ankles 
for me.
I think I made a Sainsbury or Ocado order later on. I’ll need to verify this tonight.
Carer Rozma did the last two calls. I was having mini-seizures on both calls. It’s only through the scribbled notes on the pad that I remembered he’d called.
Approximately 21:00hrs.
What a change in the view!
My belated meal
Very nice, too!
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Up The NHS – Bless!
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It was rife throughout. Today was a day of hard work that left me baffled. Sparse blog, sorry. Up at 04:50hrs. 
Potatoes are ready to make cheesy spuds later.
First brew of Glengettie.
Kitchenette view.
Cheesy cobs.
Fridge
Just as I was bending and stretching to reach the bowl, I’d just dropped on the kitchen floor. Whoopsiedangleplop! Balance-Loss-Bertha and Dizzy Dennis gave me a double assault.
knocked over. My language was a bit crude!
it was bleeding from the tube tugging and adjusting en route.
More time was lost, having to clean and medicate Little Inchies’ fungal lesion and the scrape and bruise on the chin. That stung a tad! 
soaked socks I had left earlier, soaking in Dettol and laundry liquid in the kitchen sink. Rinsed them and hung them to dry.
I got an email from the Bulwell-based Diabetes training folks.
Sunset shot.
This is how they came out of the cooker, ready to have the husks emptied into a bowl and mixed with some no-butter butter.
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Kitchen safety checks, took this rainy kitchen view
Then I went to have a long session.
The full works. Hard work due to both cartilages and several mini-seizures during the two hour session.
Rain started, rain stopped!
Failures: I undercooked the potato cakes. Never have I bought fattier, greasier Golonkowa. The carden peas were taty, though. Unfortunately, I found some mould on the wheatmeal rolls!
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Do you usually take the bait?
Contrails in the sky!
Not a very good one.
Contrails gone.
That’s a bit better now.
The clock belatedly changed.
Early evening.
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Gave way on me.
.
Cloudless! But not for long.
Plenty to pick from.
First photo.
Second snap. Asda didn’t have two of the breads in stock, so it looks likely I’ll never buy a loaf of my favourite one, the sliced milk roll. Humph!
The fridge.
The freezer.
Top cupboard,
Bottom cupboard.
Doing it in the slow-cooker this time.
Cartilage Chloe, Arthur Itis Len on the left knee, and bashing my arm against the chair as I fought my way back onto my feet after the tumbled, offered as much pain as I ever want to handle again. 
on the corner of the ottoman. Aargh! 
!
Shot up the leg, as far as my groin. Fair enough, they eased off a lot, and were barely reaching the knee. Then the shocks cut out, and cold tingling sensation took over.
Bootiful Puffer Clouds.
And found the 
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I must have had a shake on when I took this one. But, it made for an interesting modern art effort?
I took this snap from the kitchen. I gathered all the necessary items for this morning’s whole ablution event at the wet room. No, that’s not true! Sorry. I’d ran out of clean Kagoules. In fact, I only had one left, that needed washing, cause I’d just taken it off.
So, I hand-washed one and hung it in the wet room to drip-dry with the wall heater on full.
to make sure the towel would be nice and warm after I’d done the ablutionings. I’m losing this! Hehe!
As I got in the room and bent down, I had a Seizure if sine sort, that lasted the three seconds or so it took me to tumble onto the aged, grotty-looking c1966 made, charity-shop-bought, horribly beige-coloured, £300, Harold’s Haemorrhoid-testing, non-operational, acne-giving, virus-breeding, rickety, recliner. 
After rejigging the Kaghoule with the towels again, I made a brew of Co-op 99 tea. Very welcome!
, I think she’s fallen out with me. I do hope this carries on. 
Beef in onion gravy, boil-in-the-bag. With Home
A cracker of a view!
Cooked pot of pork knuckle, beetroots, pickled black beans and water chestnuts, a giant potato pancake, two doorstep sized slices of bread, and a spot of BBQ sauce added. A cheap icecream cone to follow.
Parliament, all arguing. Starmer seemed oblivious to this, and carried on over-talking them. I wish I could recall more. But that’s all folks! 
To the right I think.
To the left I think.
Ahead, I guess.
Closer shot, ahead. (Brown now?)
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Well, he’s back another reactivation,
with his nit-picking and reminders of various mistakes and bad choices I’ve made over the years, I finally gave up his attack. I feell asleep for about an hour, sprang awake, waited for 
to stop trying to twist my neck off, and as he subsided, 
had her turn at dislocating my shoulder bone. No chance of nodding off again no matter how tired 
I felt, now. At 06:40hrs, I removed the night bag, and the need for the Porcelain Throne arrived. I could hardly feel the evacuation taking place. As I stood up, I couldn’t believe the amount of mass of evacuated product in the porcelain! I’ll say no more...
I prepared the meal for tonight.
More kitchen views.
Sunshine getting through.
Decent shots?
Amazing cloud formations
The days meal.
04:40hrs: As I removed the night pouch from the day bag, I noted how little was in the nocturnal pouch. At this time it didn’t matter, as there was no discomfort from the day bag.
I checked the taps, stove, etc. things were okay. I tok a snao of the morning view on offer from the kitchenette window.
I’d done the bleeding gums and teeth, and was about to start on the shaving, but had to divert to the Porcelain Thone with haste. Damned good job I was in wet room, cause I would never have got there in time. As yesterday, it started on its own. Phew!
I was feeling a smidge perky now! So, I got the waste bags into one, and placed it near the door.
I handwashed the wolly hat and towel and hung them in the clothes arer in the hallway.
He had to go, he had a lot to do this morning. When I got around to uploading the photo. I noticed that the top tube from Little Inchie was backed up full. The new catheter tube below was gin-clear!
The Iceland elive ry arrived. The man kindly carried the carrier bags through to the kitchen for me. Kind of him, that was.
The only frozen food I’d bought was the cheap ice cream cones. I got them in the freezer first. I spotted the giant potato waffle in 
there. I’ll have that today I think. Iceland has Gung Po sauce on offer, so I bought some. I couldn’t find them when
I searched for Gung-Po sauce.
While setting up the food cupboard things for this photo; I had the weirdest of seizures. I just stopped what I was doing and held onto 
while leaning against the door in the corner. 
How the hell did I know? 
Life now seems full of stupefaction,
were present every time I woke up. I was concerned about them both, having two nights absence. Huh!
Nocturnal Pouch. Rating 5
Clock calendar updated. Hearing aid inserted. Earholes olive oiled. Eye sprayed. Rear end washed and antisepticated.
The saving produced just two little cuts.
I hoovered the little hallway, not that I’ve got a large hallway, anyway. I didn’t need to say that, did I? I’m wandering all ready. Then, I prepared the necessary items to finish the chickpeas and store them in the fridge for later use.
The day was brightening. However, the sunshine never did break through the clouds today. 
The Kala Chan peas, Stubb’s liquid smoke (this is what McDonald’s uses in their smoked food). Mushroom liquid ketchup, Marmite, liquid sea salt, pickling vinegar, and light soy sauce. 
And I got it sealed and put it in the fridge. Then I opened a can of water chestnuts, and broke some up into the mix and vinegar. 
Back to the wet room. Urgh!
Andy really has expressions that almost seem to talk to you! He’s undergoing a lot of treatment at the vets now he’s getting older. All the WPers love him.
Made the nosh up. Minced imitation beef and grey, added garden peas, pickled water chestnuts, and brown chickpeas. Poured some Gung Po sauce over it, as shown in the picture above. Mixed it all up and microwaved it.
Loverly!
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An inferior shot of the sun on its way down, taken from the kitchenette window. I think I might have already posted this one yesterday.
Doorstep-sized slices of bread were dunked into the Bulgarian-made Compass brand can of sausage and bean Stew, with some Gung Po sauce and water chestnuts added. Very Nice! It claims
The innards warned me to get to the Porcelain Throne in some haste. So, I did! I’m glad I did. Because it was a close call, I managed to do it just in time. The evacuation was completed within seconds of initiating the motion. Well, I didn’t start it really, it flowed on its own, before my coxic landed on the raised plastic seat. Pongy in the extreme! I knocked some things off of the trolley. Cleaning up took 30 minutes!
I made a brew of Co-op 99 tea, and got the computer on. After it had been on for a minute or two, I got this message appear on the screen. Narrator Keyboard. I didn’t knnow I’d turned on the narrator keyboard. Or what the flipping ‘eck it was or is for that matter!
01:20 hrs: “Carer Joe” rang the intercom; I pressed “Admit”, and he was soon in the room with me. Straight away, I asked him about the freshers and inquired where I, or we, had stored them during Joe’s make-more-room session. All done to make me safer and less at risk of taking a tumble, that we’d put them? Without hesitation, he pointed at the ottomans. Of course I did feel a fool anyway, but the moment he bent to take the first lid off, I remembered where we’d put them. Another mysterious blank had been solved! Hahaha!
The sun was well risen now. I’ll have to put my prescription sunglasses on soon. When the sun comes round and in through the balcony windows. I do this now, when the glare disturbs and upsets 
. My vision is severely affected, especially on sunny afternoons.
A can of beef and potato vegetable stew, plenty of Gung-Po sauce, added mushroom ketchup, and sliced pickled water chestnuts. Baked some round rolls of bread. I over cooked them a smidge. They turned out like I used to like them years ago; but the rotting teeth nowadays gave me a lot of pain. So I had to break them up and add them to the flavoured sauce to soften them slightly. Nice!
The first spotted smoke
Then Ejaz spotted another to the right.
Now he could see three!
. I assume I’d been having Nocturnal Seizures.