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Dad knocked one out for me, for talking sarcastically,
Soups made from bones, tongue & hooves, are prone…
Sugar was cheap, a few more teeth, gone,
I got beaten up, lost more than one,
Dad sent me to the gym to learn to box skillfully,
Had a bout versus a muscle man, I was scrawny,
Lost all but one, won that on a technicality,
He had a heart attack, which was a bummer!
Dad got me playing cricket, being as it was summer,
Fast bowler, ball in gob, even bloody awfuller…
I got blood all over my coiffure,
A mugger, I said sod-off, he gave me a smack…
Lost a tooth from the front, one from the back,
Wonder how he did that, suppose it’s just a knack,
Hospital, trolley fell off of it, Oy, caramba!
Became an alcoholic, just beer, no gin or lager,
Pissed, miss bus, walk home, fall, lose a tooth, regular,
depression, sadness, melancholy, have a mope,
False teeth? I don’t have any hope…
Now Starmer is the UK’s new pope!
A greedy, dishonest, lying bloke,
I can’t afford to have my teeth out,
My bank balance is close to nothing,
Keir stole my money, I’ve not got gout,
Do I get no freebies? No, I do without,
I’m getting older, more scatterbrained, dottier,
But have toothache! It’s getting rottener,
But, with far fewer teeth to come a cropper,
11 medications, including Warfarin & Beta-Blocker,
I’d like to set myself up as Starmer Knocker?
A derogator of dishonest Herr Starmer,
I should really try to keep myself calmer,
If Keir would kindly die painfully, & slower,
Now that really would be good Karma!
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02:00hrs: I bounded out of bed, did a double-flip, and yodelled as I opened the window and greeted the world with a smile…
That is not exactly authentic.
05:40hrs, I woke and fell asleep again, the moment I felt the pain from 
lurking in both knees. Wondering why, after all the harassment over the last two days, should the one ailment that has been absent all last week, suddenly start on the rampage? Within, I imagine two minutes of nodding back into dreamland, 
twitched; so violently, just the once. But it was enough to make me force my way out of bed, take off the nocturnal catheter pouch, and go in search of Codeine to ease the pain. This has never happened before; not the neck twitching, but the pain being so sharp. I’m assuming that it may have 
been caused by not getting medication for the days while in the hospital. What do you think? I left the card nearby with the bag, so the Carer can assess the colour for me.
Then I did the safety checks, although doing them last night when I got back from the hospital and 
finding I’d left the oven on was not encouraging.
I glanced out of the window and thought I saw the moon still showing in the photograph that Mirza took for me. Near the centre, about a third of the way down
I then thought I’d better get the ablutions and medications done before the Carer arrives.
The first task was to utilise the Porcelain Throne. But, for the third day on the trot, no evacuation was passed! A fair bit of noisy wind escaped, but not a sausage. Nothing, ziltch, nada or a blank. The shave was bloodless. Great!
I made a brew of Glengettie tea and got on the computer to update the Sat/Sunday blog. Which I achieved – but with Grammarly telling me that I had errors, wait for it… 333 errors! It took me an hour just to check them out & correct.
Carer Nimra arrived, walked straight in without using the door-chime, and found me with just the underpants on. Well, it was a warm day. Haha!
She’d been told nothing about me being hospitalised. I gave her an outline of the incidents that led to the fall and the following 21 hours of waterless, foodless time in the hospital. Late on Sunday, a new team started their shift, and I mentioned to one of the incoming nurses that there was no food or water available, as I was doing my every 15-minute mini ECG checks. She came back with a tuna and mayonnaise sandwich and a coffee for me. I thanked her for her efforts. But unfortunately, there were two rare things that I cannot eat. I didn’t mention it; not after she’d made the effort to help me. Carer Nimra barrier creamed my back flaps; I couldn’t reach them earlier. Then, she put some on the left Cartilage of Chloe, who was giving me some bother. We went onto the balcony, she wanted to take a photo, I think. Graded the urine bag as a level 5. Nice gal.
I then had a bit of a nerve-wrenching bother with CorelDraw and the computer, though.
I’d put an SD card in, which I found earlier, to see if CoralDraw would let me clear it, and try it in the camera to see if it would work.
, No! When I tried to delete the photographs (they were from 2009), the whole shebang froze!
Almost instantly, semi-panic was birthed, and 
DAWNED!
I sank so low. How can I handle so many disasters in such a short space of time? I wanted to curse, spit and scream! As I tried to think of a way to close the other programs, I couldn’t. The computer or CorelDraw, or both, were not allowing me to do anything at all. As I was thinking, if I leave it for an hour, just maybe it will reactivate? Yes, that’s how stupid I am! Which brought on the pathetic self-pity as well…
The door chime rang out, and in walked the lovely retired nurse 💗 who had been tending to my Harold’s Haemorrhoids, Little Inchies’ fungal lesion. She inquired why the plaster was on my head, and even the depression could not stop me from telling the tale of Saturday & Sunday. She listened too. 🌹Bless her cotton socks 🌹. She then swapped the plaster with a new one. Checked out the piles and bum; they were much easier. Off she went with my appreciation shown, and of course, returned as I turned on the computer, and the same frozen CorelDraw showed up. So much for turning it off at the plug, the only thing I could think of. Then the doubts sprouted up again; Did I think of turning it of at the plug, or did I actually do that?
Doubting Thomas’s arrival, followed by the certainty that Calamity Jane was on the way, and back into mode.
I believe that while talking and listening with my sweet District Nurse, 🌹 I think that I flirted with 
for a few minutes, knowing that my precious nurse was with me. Have I fallen in love at my age, and in my current physical & mental state?
Her arrival actually froze out Darius for a while! Nothing has ever achieved that before! Death will, but then again, you never know, Darius may follow you into Heaven or Hell? I’m writing down my thoughts again. Waffling on? Lost the plot!Tsk!
I regained a modicum of concentration and mused over what to try next with the computer problem.
The intercom chimed out. It was Carer Nimra. As she was coming up, I had a bit of a seizure, only a short one, but they usually have after-effects that are worse than after a long one. Blown if I can recall what took place. I feel things went well, though. Think we parted happily.
Now, back to the computer problem. I made sure this time, and had to disconnect from the plug, taking out the plug for a minute, then replacing it in the socket. I had little faith, but I continued. I didn’t turn on the computer, but instead, I turned it off again at the socket, and then booted the tormenting computer—with a flinch and a prayer. It went through a scary list of options to boot it up. To be honest, (Sorry to scare Herr Starmer by using that word, honest), I thought it wasn’t going to work, and I pressed the option buttons without making a note of them – What a Fool! It booted up! But I can’t remember the sequence for next time when I start it!
I got so angry with myself!
I pressed on and opened CorelDraw, Humph!
Some fonts didn’t load, so I had to select substitutes, which may cause problems in earlier postings.
The file you require is unavailable. Select another or save and rename this one to a different folder and name. I was baffled now. So I pressed the save-as tab and renamed the file. Well, it loaded, but very slowly. I expected a lot of work to be missing, as I couldn’t save it when the computer froze. Turned off CorelDraw and reopened it after a few minutes. The newly named file opened, and I investigated what was missing. As it happens, only a few photos and graphics were not there! I think I must have saved it just before the freeze. If so, I’m happy I did!
But the fear of booting up again lingered.
I got the Sat & Sun blog posted, and then I realised I hadn’t posted Fridays either. I was going to do that on Saturday, but then tumble interfered. So I checked that blog and posted it off too. I felt I was getting somewhere at last.
Carer Ejaz did the last call. No one had told him about the Hospital mayhem. He didn’t have time to listen anyway; it was a short visit, and he had another one to attend to. I’d not made a meal yet, so he left the night pouch on the c1966, £300 Oxfam charity shop-bought, wincingly grotty, beige-coloured, crumb-covered from my nocturnal nibblings, itch-making, uncomfortable, positively unhealthy, and dangerous, no longer operational, virus-breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, dirtier than ever catheter-tube-trapping recliner, for me to put on later after cooking. Which is okay, the new day bags are shorter and much smaller, so the risk of going giddy at bending down is minimal. The lad asked me to send the blogs to his mobile, which I did. He 
just had time to take two photos for me. One of the fantastic sun-going-down view, so fiery and colourful, from the kitchen window. Then he snapped my much-improved Lymphorrea Leslie legs. Don’t they look so 
much better now my new love 🌹 has been looking after them?
Well, I’m shattered now. I’m going to save & close everything, shut down the computer, and see if I can remember the sequence to boot it up again. If not, suicide is the best option. I can’t stand losing the computer forever, with all the disasters of the past week. Here goes, fingers crossed and curses and a hex on liar, back-hander taker, two-faced, unreliable, pensioner-disabler-family robbing, more Tory than Labour inspired, ☢ Herr Starmer. ☢
I may not be back…
Of course, you won’t know if I’m dead or the computer won’t boot, will you? Because I won’t be able to post this desperate plea for help, formerly identified as a blog. Crossed fingers then.
Heheheh!
What a Relief!
Got in, but with a degree of “It’ll only happen againness” – “How the hell did I do thatness” and
sank into the most prolonged Seizure of the day. I was just coming out of it when Carer Ejaz arrived to do the last call. So, my memory is a little vague again.
Ejaz, I think, took a photo of the meal. I guess it was Ejaz, anyway? Took the diabetic socks off. Left the catheter night pouch on the recliner, so I could remember to put it on after making the meal.
Got the meal of the day prepared.
Dry bread, tomato sarnies.
Red onions and some
superb chips!
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I should sleep tonight!
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You’ll be guaranteed, falls, accidents, the odd blip,
A Grand Morning. No, Ejaz, though.
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My grasp of the ungraspable,
I was up and about (feeling deeply vague) when I realised that it was 03:55hrs. I recall what I was doing and what I was thinking at the time. Oh, yes, I was sitting on the 
Porcelain Throne, painfully forcing some movement from the evacuating monster torpedo! Through sheer willpower and determination, I’d freed myself of that 15-inch torpedo within 15 minutes 
!
be hand-washed and hung to dry. So, I hung them up on a coat hanger above the sink. (The nurse who came later was kind enough to take this photo and email it to me. I found it on my return from the hospital on Sunday morning.) This is when I stood back from reaching up to the bar and took the tumble.
ARRIVAL AT THE QMC
Twenty minutes later, I was collected and taken to the QMC Emergency Department surgical unit, in the Outpatients Department, in the blue zone, N4 area, and given a whole brain CT scan. I think they found one. Haha! 
Then back to the Emergency CT ward. I was locked up, never to move again, until I was freed. And some 20 hours of misery awaited me. 
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Humph! A bit of a mind blank here. I can’t recall getting into my flat! But once inside, the heat in there scared me to death! I hastened to the obvious place the heat was coming from, the kitchen, and found that I had not, as I thought I had, turned off the stove, and it had overheated the place. No signs of damage were found. t must have been on a low heat level. But it could have been dangerous leaving it for all that time. Blimey, I could have easily caused a fire. What a Silly Stupid Iriot!
I DID… NOTHING! ehehe! Tsk!
Carer Mirzra snapped the outdated calendar clock. Then he made the necessary changes and adjustments for me.
It may have been from Ejaz from last week. I can recall us looking at the partial moon. Ejaz must have snapped it for me and forgot to send it earlier? Thanks, mate.
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Sunset
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Eye eye, what’s going on here?
Nocturnal catheter pouch.
Balcony walking aids.
The cartilages were dodgy all day.
Photo from 2022.
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Gone is my logic, I’m no longer systematical,
started to have a go at me when I freed myself of the clutches of the bed and bent down to release the nocturnal pouch from the catheter. Then I realised a Eureka moment was taking place. For the first time ever, I’d woken up with 
.
I changed the dates on the calendar clock. And used some toothache spray as the Toothache Tiffany kicked off.
being a smidge persistent.
facilities. Then, I sorted out 
the ablutions and medication. Even 
it’s made of in the book. Soylent Green is introduced as being made of plankton, but as the film unfolds, the main character discovers that it’s manufactured from dead bodies. It was released in 1973. Starring Charlton Heston & Edward G Robinson. I recall thinking it was a relatively slow film, and politicians would never do anything like that. (Back in 1973) Now we have Herr Starmer, and Oligarch leaders, Murdering Putin & La-La Criminal Trump in charge. So… 
Replaced 
After the girl left, I took a photo from the balcony on the right end. The mudslide looked thicker than usual this morning. 
Did heavy rain & wind play a part yesterday
investigate, taking the long picker-upperer with me. I was astounded when I recognised it. It was a bottle of eau de cologne. I bought this eight years ago, from the Poundshop on Upper Parliament Street. But managed to lose it. It was down there all that time. Shows how the cleaner or Carer is not good at cleaning.
Back on today’s blog.
Mild Vegetarian Curry,
Speedy sunset tonight.
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A fair young maiden granted a date with Inchie,
the longer lever, which has a 50% wobble. Checked the kitchen for safety, and went off to the Porcelain Throne evacuation. Trotsky Terence was in charge again. This time, dark brown, gooey and messy. The cleaning-up time was longer than the evacuation time, yet again.
I washed my dandies, emptied the urine pouch, and went into the kitchen to bag things. Taking this scene of the morning view. Not as pretty as yesterday’s. No pink in it at all.
Back in the kitchen, I put the waste bin bag into the big bag. 
In the balcony room, I changed the calendar clock and inserted the hearing aids into my earholes. And I realised I’dn’t altered the month; it was still July showing. I’d have thought someone would have noticed it. I got in a pickle last month with using the dates from this clock. Hehehe! I asked Ejaz to keep an eye on it. 
The first one taken straight ahead, zoomed on the dwellings, drug dealers and growers, muggers, pickpockets and unemployed, immigrants, scroungers, drug gangs, freed burglars, murderers & child molesters on parole. But I’d sooner live here than anywhere near the biggest crook, liar, and unprincipled, corrupt, immoral, unscrupulous, dishonest, evil-intentioned, dishonourable, splenetic, nefarious, fiendish, detestable, deceitful, insincere, criminal, unethical, miscreant, and merciless, debased, ruthless, heartless, sepulchral, gut-churning, sick-making, murderer-freeing ex-barrister, 
The 2nd snap of Citrus Walk’s end car parking area. And the parking on the chevrons by the little red car. Haha!
area of the right leg. This was followed by several small electric shocks shooting up the leg. I asked him to pull the sock down to have a look. He said some liquid is leaking through the skin. Ejaz applied barrier cream to it. We noticed after, and a small piece of skin was on the carpet, just an inch or so. 
The left cartilage was still swollen. And the unmistakable pain from Arthur Itis joined in.
I took a snap from the kitchen of the windows. I forecast that it will be raining soon. Arthur Itis coming on is a sign of that. Back to the front room, and took another snap from 
the computer desk… well, the 1963-built, falling to pieces, tatty, scuffed, Hopewell’s E-Plan Sideboard, with the doors falling off, to be more precise. Haha!
The wheelchair was soaked, as were the four and three-wheeled walkers! The gaps between the windows were how the rain got in. Again, it was coming from the East. The rain, I mean. 
The wind seemed to be churning in from all directions. Howling again. The rain is now worse than ever, and the wind seems to have died down a smidge. At least it’s not so noisy.
Huh, minutes later, the wind was back. Blowing the trees and branches around as if they were made of paper.
a snap of the sunshine. But no. The rain had started again. So I took shots of the rain from inside. One from the left window, and the second one 
om the right window.
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04:30hrs: The flow-back pains from the dodgy catheter day contraption were stinging away when I woke up. The nocturnal pouch was barely damp; there was so little urine in it! The first thing was to dismount the hospital bed and investigate. 
tackled. With a 
was in. 
Well, a mega-change from this morning’s evacuation, I must say.
. But not liquified and all over in seconds, as the last three visits have been. Small cubes hit the water without much splashing. Green and Oxo-shaped.
I left off doing poor Little Inchy’s Fungal lesion treatment. Until I’d sorted
Then, I did the other regulars; Ears oiled, eye drops in, Phorpain gelled 
Arthur Itis’s knees, then 
.
You can see the swelling on the left knee. This is partly due to Arthur Itis, and Cartilage Carol, with Cartilage Chleo in support, who have mangled the knee areas of both legs. The darned Little monkeys!
I finished in the wet room and took a snap through the open window of the stunning light blue and pink sky. Nice!
I hobbled into the front room, collected the bins from the wet room & kitchen, and then got everything sorted.
Carer Ejaz arrived in a good mood. He did a good jon helping me this morning. I felt a smidge guilty in keeping him longer than he should have, and was nervous of missing the bus when he shot off. He’s to make the last call; I hope he catches the bus in time.
I revisited the Porcelain Throne. It was a short visit. Nothing happened.
dawned.
Anne Gyna visited as I started to imbibe the meal.
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and or
regions, but needed the use of the Porcelain Throne.
which I cannot recall all the Whoopsiedangleplops I had. 
The intercom chirped up again. It was the chap with the Iceland order to deliver. He was soon up at the flat.
He put the things into the kitchenette for me in no time. Thanked him.
.
Just one bag of the Harry-Ramsdens frozen chips that had to go in the freezer, and I had to do some jiggling with the goods in there to make room for the tiger rolls.
the other nurses’ & Carers’ nibble selection on the carers’ table.
Earlier, I got the calendar clock updated. I missed the photo off, 
I also forgot these, taken from the balcony.
The intercom chimed again.
Despite how I was feeling, I still enjoyed this delightfully tasty meal.
I was working on CorelDRAW and felt a dampness on the Catheter leg. I investigate. 
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Morning urine, Ezaz classed as a number 6. Why the heck I put it on the graph as a 4, remains a mystery to me. I need to update the NHS graph, and I’m confident I’ll remember to. Tsk!
Porcelain Throne. Which, as it turns out, I needed suddenly on my way into the room. 
top! As my bum hit the plastic seat, there was what sounded like a splat, which took maybe 5 seconds to clear my bowels… but leaving a distinct feeling that a follow-up evacuation was already brewing! There was a mass of wind during the first evacuation. The minute spent on the Throne was dwarfed by the time it took me to clean up afterwards. 
picker-upperer from the floor of the wet room and then got on with cleaning my teeth. 
evacuation started of its own accord. Talk about lucky, I was. This session was perhaps all over quicker than the first one! That was because it was almost liquid. Making as much mess, though, for me to clean up. Now, 
dawned. I find it embarrassing to say, but I went into an unstoppable, fed-up, mammoth-sized sulk. How do these things happen to me every day?
I felt first, and got Kodak Tim 2, and took a snap. It didn’t turn out too well, but I wasn’t aware of that at the time. I cheered up a little. I returned to the wet room and got on with the cleaning again, almost contentedly.
areas, aftershace on shaving cuts, it’d been that long they all dried solid. Nasal spray was applied to the legs and ankles, using the picker-upperer and kitchen towels. Toothache tincture was used, and I 
Then I remembered to change the calendar clock. And booted the computer.
For an unknown reason, desperation and frustration, possibly?
A letter arrived. We are to have safety checks done on the flats. The workers will be abseiling up and down the outside for four days, checking the integrity of the building. They asked us not to open any windows fully. It’s good that the NCC looks after our safety.
