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A change in style for Ode of the day today,
Sarcasm I tried to avoid, store away…
Add intelligence, albeit adumbratively,
I tried to create an eclectic array…
Thoughts, & memories a personal breviary,
Steer clear of any lachrymosity…
Not to overdo my loquacity,
Or even mention Starmer’s lubricity!
Mix reality with dreams & veridicality,
To blend farce with pretend-unctuosity,
I was hoping for some theopneusty,
I failed in all; I just created self-anxiety…
My earlier ideas mentally acted evasively…
Doreen Dementia with great audacity…
Stopped me from accessing, acted evasively…
Dealing with my thoughts circuitously,
My grey cells, infested with a new proclivity,
My intended hopes fell into jejunity!
I’m sad now I’ve missed the opportunity…
I’ve lost my thoughts, plans & fecundity,
Fading intelligence & mental acuity,
Next week, I’ll be back again in Ward 23,
The nurse said for electroencephalography,
It records brainwaves, electroencephalographically
I wish I could have done this ode betterly…
It started so well as well… Pity!
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Yet another sleepless night! I went through the same routine. Last night I watched the TV in the £300 second-hand shop-bought, c1966, moth-eaten, bedraggled, grotty, cringingly beige-coloured, much-dilapidated, crumb-containing from my nocturnal nibblings, bug-ridden, itch-inspiring, not-working recliner to watch an episode of my favourite, ‘Heartbeat’, on the TV and eat the meal.
But Sweet Morpheus refused to arrive. Once more, I moved into the hospital bed. But the piles were so painful, I moved back to the c1966, £300 charity shop bought second-hand, wincingly grotty, beige coloured, not working, crumb-covered from the nocturnal nibblings, itch-making, uncomfortable, virus-breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, recliner. I stayed there with the TV on and nothing to watch, but as a general rule, this often sends me into the bliss of sleep when the adverts come on. Not tonight, Oh, no such luck!
I was still there at 06:00hrs and decided to rise from the depths of the uncomfortable recliner. The first job was to remove the 
, 
and then get a wash and medicate poor Harold’s Haemorrhoids, which were as bad as yesterday morning. It’s not anywhere near so bloodied this time, though.
I made a halfhearted attempt at straightening the hospital bed covers, giving myself a decent 
.
For the first hour or so, I had no 
s, and as far as I could tell, no 
seizures either. When the shocks came on, the seizures came on simultaneously. I managed a nifty bit of balance manoeuvring that prevented any tumbles.
. I was taking a photo of the dark morning sky, 
with Venus as the only thing on view in the sky.
I considered adopting another Smug Mode when I saw how well it came out. And took a 
lower-down view of the hidden houses. As I closed the window, the Kodak dropped from my limp grip. 
! I 
automatically grabbed the camera as I bent down and actually caught it! Unfortunately I had a 
and banged my 
against the floor radiator. It made such a mess that I got a new set-up from the main junk room and retired to the wet room to get the bag changed and things cleaned up,
putting on some fresh PPs afterwards. At least I felt a little freshened up and cleaner. It took me ages to replace it, and the bending down so much bothered Dizzy Dennis, who told me about it. I sat down on the Porcelain 
Throne to let things calm down. Soon, however, I found myself in need of the Porcelain Throne mentioned above.
It was all over in about a minute. I passed so many soft chunky lumps, along with what looked like a good dose of gravy, that followed immediately after the approximately twenty cubes of poo had escaped! It’s a blessing in a way; the differences in colour, pong, and contents in my daily visits to the wet room’s Porcelain Throne.
Never ever the same twice on the trot!
As I belatedly got on the computer, Carer Alia arrived. Medications sorted and given.
I did well with the photo saving after using the cCleaner this morning. Only a couple were rejected.
I pressed on and finished the Wednesday blog. It took me a while, as I had a prolonged Seizure when checking the blog for errors. I do recall starting the Grammarly check. Their new confusing side strip indicators (they’ve just come on again, and with my eyesight, they often confuse me) annoy me with all these unwanted changes, and that was my last memory for an hour or so. I very nearly just clicked the ‘Publish’ tag. But I managed to see what an absolute mess I’d made with so many errors and mistakes, and I had to spend another hour reviewing them and correcting them. Grumph!
EERIE PHOTO
I snapped a picture of the horizon. The mists in the background and the sun rising from the left behind the block of flats looked beautiful, almost surreal.
The cannabis-growing dwellings showed up, with the ground and roof frost melting more on the top of some houses than others. Yes, I was wearing my Sherlock Holmesian hat this morning. Hehehe!
Gave me a few tugs, but she soon settled down. 
He was enjoying himself for a few hours. He was on and off for most of Carer Sam’s midday visit. Not sure what she thought was going on. But was kind enough not to mention it. I explained to her that the nurse had ordered me some cream and lotions after she had checked my magnificent (Ahem!) bodily orifices. The acne and eczema, Little Inchies fungal lesion, the Catheter strap area, and 
piles will benefit from these. But, I’ve forgotten what she told me, that each one was for now. Tsk!
I made an Asda order for late next week. I shall make sure I get it right this time! No, I didn’t, after all.
“Sorry, something went wrong. Please try again later”
Well, I did several times. But no, go!
: I spotted on the web that the new Heron Food Store in Sherwood had opened. I decided to pay it a late visit. Which meant having to get washed, unclothed, and reclothed, as well as struggling to get the trousers on after rejigging the new catheter set up so it didn’t pull too much with the trews on. Then, I had a battle to get the shoes on. I set up the three-wheeled trolley and hoped I’d got the bus times right. I set out…
I left the front door with the walker and turned to lock the door, but I didn’t have the keys! I was sure I had them in the coat pocket. Now I must find and collect them and get to the bus stop on time. A mini-panic overcame me. Back in the flat, it took me a few minutes to find the keys, then I checked that I’d got the bus pass on me. I departed again in something nearing a poor imitation of a rush.
I went to the lift, down in it, out of it, along the connecting corridor, through the main foyer, and out onto the street. I noticed no bus at the stop. Maybe I was early. I hobbled hastily to the bus stop.
How terribly disappointing! The sign read something like, “This bus stop is closed due to road repair workings!” Shitski!
All that effort and pain to get ready as well!
I walked back to Winwood Court foyer and let some nurses in as I entered the building.
Along the dark, dank corridor, then through the connecting swipe door into Woodthorpe Court, limped to the lifts, up in the lift, out of the lift, into the flat’s foyer, and finally back home to the flat. I think I sulked a little! I got iI got inside, feeling that my decision to go shopping was not a good idea. It took me yonks to save the two photos on file for use.
I had to use the cCleaner twice for some reason?
Better make my evening sarnies then.
The photographs on the left were taken by cheeky chappie Carer Christopher!
The little scallywag took them while I was eating my meal & watching something on YouTube.
I had no idea he’d done so until he handed me my camera. 
Hehehe! You can see how I was enjoying, despite the painful teggies, as the last few teeth battled to chew through the mini feast. And there’s no doubt about it, it was one of the most enjoyed ones I’d had in a long time. Good job that I’ve got the Tooth Pain Killer spray at hand! It was well used.
The Meal: It was nothing fancy. Two large defrosted cheesy topped rolls, 
none-butter-buttered, with a smidge of Marmite added. Chopped onions, a big dollop of pickled beetroots, sliced-up a sea-salted Dutch tomato, and a stick of Marmite-infused cheddar cheese! I made up four cobs, wrapped up two and put them in the fridge for the morning. (I’ve just taken them out of the refrigerator now, Thursday midday) I must have been concentrating on the programme on the computer or eating the meal (most likely).
Cause I don’t know how I didn’t realise that Chris was snapping away with the Kodak. Hehe!
SADLY… Sleep was resisting again!
I didn’t even bother trying to get into the bed after last night’s ‘Oh, so painful’ effort at sleeping was, for poor old Harold’s Haemorrhoids. I returned to the £300 second-hand shop purchased in 1966, which was a welt-causing, uncomfortable, not working, itch-inspirational, and crumb-containing recliner.
Initially, I had some success and nodded off for around about an hour & a half.
Then, the first visit for several days came from the nasty 
. That was the end of my night’s repast. I forced myself up at 06:30hrs… and commenced a battle with the to get it detached from the day bag.
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TTFN & Taketh Care, each!
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By 04:00 hrs, I was up and about, almost alive, really. I went to the wet room, where I unwillingly spent about fifteen minutes waiting and forcing, encouraging the motion to move. Eventually, a long, broad, massive torpedo slowly emerged. I remained seated for a short while, half in relief of the riddance finishing and half to catch my breath. It was agony and hard work this morning. There was no mess, no 
bleeding. Great! Mind you, Harold’s Haemorrhoids suffered a fair bit, and they bled. The Germoloids were utilised. 
The Iceland order arrived.
delivered.
The Christmas seasonal coffee I bought for the carers & nurses had a short use-by date on them. On the other hand, the freezer looked well cram-packed, but this was deceiving.
Had his quota of cheese,
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But does that include the product?
During the last four hours on the computer, I just got one photo to save! And that was one of the worst I’ve ever taken.
I got up at 05:00hrs and got the ablutions done. Took a poo, and it was two-tone in both ways. Started off taking agony and ages to get it moving; one giant torpedo plopped out, followed by soft, gooey Trotsky Terence splashes! A few weeny cuts shaving. I didn’t do all the medical checks, as the DVT nurse is going to check the read end in the examination later at the surgery; blood and Haemorrhoid Harold are to be tested again. 
A jar of the Golokowa meat. (Pork shank), potatoes done in the air fryer, peas done in the slow cooker, sliced tiny tomatoes yellow & red, and some extra strong mature cheddar cheese in the bowl. Spirit vinegar on the potatoes.
Early evening sky.
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After yet another night of jumping awake, at 05:00, I gave up trying for the elusive sleep, and I gingerly removed the nocturnal catheter pouch, grabbed a hold of 
and off to the kitchen for safety checks and got the kettle on. The taps, cooker and fridge looked okay, and I had what must have been one of the longest-ever bubbly-sounding passings of wind that I can ever remember. It was pongy and two-tone at times! I 
diverted to the wet room without any delay.
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Written (started) at 16:15hrs: A terrible night’s sleep again. The computer, bank, medical needs, the camera, TV & remote, a tumble later this morning, Mind-Mangling-Malcolm, Memory-Mashing-May, Glaucoma Gladys, Catheter Cathy’s Pain-giving Contraption, Loss-Balance-Belinda, Back-Pain-Brenda, Mini-Seizures, Earache Erasmus, and Toothache Tiffany are just too much to cope with. That’s not counting the computer problems with Word, Excel, CorelDraw & Trotsky Terence. As I was typing this, the browser started doing I don’t know what, but it took a good half-an-hour before I could use it again, then I had to turn everything off and back on again. which I’d done twice earlier, already having to use Ccleaner twice to get some photos to go… I’m fed up!
I woke for the umpteenth time, and I saw it was 06:00hrs. Just as the innards warbled at me, and that automatic butt-clenching you do when you know if you don’t get to the WC on time, you’re going to mess yourself! I had no doubt this was the case. I fumbled out of the bed, stubbing my toe, grabbed Four-Pronged Willy, the walking stick, and limped hastily to the wet room.
Then I did medicationings. Little Inchies fungal lesion ointmentating pain was on a par with my getting the Protection Pants on. The head was not too painful at all. Finally, the wet room was cleaned and sorted!
Carer Kimberly came next. S
tonight. She took a photo of the head before it started bleeding again and put a plaster on it. I’ve been looked after today. I didn’t mention the poo-poo. Whoopsie.
more snaps that it wouldn’t let me earlier in the day.
This was when I refilled the nibble box on the Nurse’s and Carers’ table.
A slightly later shot of the local houses, most of which I noticed today, was leaving via Mansfield Road in their cars. Can’t blame them after four people were shot from a 
vehicle on Winchester Street. Which is about 300 yards from the houses and the flats I live in. The one on the left is a mystery one. No idea why I took it at all.
This is a later shot of the houses I took with the old Kodak camera. I also used it to take the saucepan above left. You can tell by the different-sized pictures.
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I took this just before the total darkness fell. I wonder if these are part of the Northern Light colours? I must search Google later.
I got the meal as planned, made it, and served it.
I washed the dishes and took another shot from the kitchen window, this time of a different but gorgeous view. Seconds later, the whole sky went dark.
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I stirred after one more night of constantly jumping awake. I forced myself into imitation action. Pondering all the time if CorelDraw would open and work, I emptied the nocturnal catheter pouch.
At this stage, Carer Christopher arrived. It was like talking to a robot. Hehehe! It would have been easier to talk to myself, which I do all the time anyway. Don’t we all? He issued the medications, and then he put the diabetic socks on my legs. Then he helped me into the slippers
Sun coming from the left.
Sun glistening on the balcony. You wouldn’t believe it was black plastic of some sort.
Higher the beautiful clouds.
Lovely view.
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Another crap, waking up all the time all night. I shot awake so often that I believed it was late and forced myself out of bed, emptied the nocturnal catheter 
bag, and dragged myself miserably to the wet room. A quick clean-up: Cartilage tormentedly got the fresh PPs on and returned to the bed to tidy it up. All the time, I try not to think of the computer hassles and problems. It’s getting to me now! Then I had to go back to the wet room. Cor, what a messy job that was!
I got the computer on, and of course, it was not letting me put photos or graphics on again. I joke not. Carer Chris arrived. I was too responsive. With my fingers crossed, I was using Norton and Ccleaner to make space on the computer. After they were done, I should have closed everything down and rebooted for the changes to take effect. I was trying to concentrate on what I’d done and what needed doing. Carer Chris took the laundry down for me on his way out, and I returned to the in-progress cock-up I was unknowingly in the middle of. 
Then I noticed the time on the clock was 09:00hrs! It had taken me hours to get things going! Grumble-Grunts!
It took me about half an hour to get it to work. It was all a matter of blind faith, hope, and keeping my fingers crossed, jobbie.
I took a break to think things through and see if I could figure out if I had done something wrong. I went into the kitchen and took some more sky shots, then back to the computer and inserted the SD card once more into the reader. And it loaded straight away? Phew!
midday call. I must have gotten up this morning around 05:00 hrs. Then I remembered taking a photo of the ancient clock using the other camera. I got the SD card, and it went through. The clock depicted 04:30 hrs when I pressed the day and date buttons. I realised I struggled with the computer’s memory for around five hours or more! Taking an hour of for the ablutionings and pant changes. Huh!
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Pouch.
Another crap photo.
The Computer started playing up.
Oh, a decent photo of the fog.
Hoovered up.
Getting foggier.
Cleared a bit later.
Now the computer is making me sick!
Rain
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and fumbled my way out of the bed. Straightened the clothes, got the night bag off the catheter contraption, left it nearby for the Carer to check 
with the NHS colour Card later. Then, I grabbed the walking stick and went to the wet room for the Porcelain Throne and ablutioning session. I was flabbergasted! This visit was as near to normal as I’ve had for many months! Neither Trotsky Terence nor Constipation Conrad had the advantage! No bleeding, not too messy, and no pain whatsoever! 
or any bother from 
or even 
! I think I wondered if I was still in bed dreaming all this. It was going great! 
! Can all this be happening? A good stand-up naked body scrub with no problems! I dried off and got medicationing done, and I don’t recall any bother with any of them… Apart from the always painful, 
which is to be expected and 
has to be coped with as best I can. It’s like an old friend. Hehehe! 
I made a brew of Glengettie tea, and got on the computer. It hurts to say or write that word! 
realised it must have been 03:00 hrs when I got up; otherwise, I’d never have had time to get all that I’d done in an hour.
Hristina calling. She came in, and we chatted as she got the hypodermic thingies ready. A lovely lady. She soon took the blood samples and an extra one this time so they could check if the Vitamin B5 tablets were working. As we were gossiping before her leaving, the 
intercom rang again. It was the food delivery from Sainsbury’s store.
Carer Chloe came next. She was doing the domestics for me, bless her. ♥ She checked the fridge and a cupboard for the sell-by-dates on the products that I could not read them. Well, believe it or not, I took 3 carrier bags that the gal had sorted out, full of out-of-date foods! As I took them to the waste chute, she checked one cupboard. She filled two more carriers with food for the waste chute. She kindly took them to the chute for me as she left. Four more cupboards to sort on her next visit. ♥ She then mopped the kitchen for me. Earned her money, Chloe did! ♥
kicked off out of the blue.
to do.
Parmentier potatoes, vegetable pasty, Marmite cheese, yellow and red tomatoes, and Marmite rice cracker, with a splash of Branston Sauce and some liquid sea salt.
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05:10 hrs: I woke up from a muddled dream. An odd one, all my current problems came barraging into my mind. I think I was laughing at them, knowing they would end when I snuff it. I lay pondering my strange response. 06:00 hrs: I forced myself to evacuate the 
bed. My balance was all over the place. I carefully removed the nocturnal catheter bag and emptied it. taking a photo for the carer to judge the colour rating later on for me. 
I snapped a picture of the morning blue sky, and then I turned on the kettle to make a brew of Glengettie tea. Then, I looked in the fridge to see what 
options were available for nosh later in the day or evening.
Went to wash the half-drank and had gone cold mug of Gengettie tea. And Carer Richard arrived. 
in pain, poor chap. My medications were issued. After a quick natter, he went wearily off on his way home.
I got the computer on and found this email tracker from Parcel Force. They are delivering the Low-Cost Food store order today. It’s been 10 days since the confirmation email telling me that the store had despatched it. It’s coming from Mansfield. At least with Parcel Force, they deliver to the door. Some others leave it down in the foyer.
I had an urgent call to the Porcelain Throne 15 minutes or so ago.
I could not do much until the evacuation was over; the almost liquid contents only took a few seconds to sprout out. By then, there was blood running down my legs onto the floor, all over the basin, and it took me ages to get me and the mess cleaned up! The floor 
had to be mopped and disinfected as well. The different Cream, which had a dropper, was much thinner and far less painful to apply. I hope they send this one again in next month’s prescription.
Sorted the mess and got back to the computer.
Hello, I can hear an alarm going off somewhere. I shall go investigate. These new hearing aid batteries are good!
It turned out to be a fish supper. And very nice it was too.
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