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A new medication, called Ziprasidone,
Increased moments of feeling woebegone,
Still, I had a bad start… being born,
I get reckless, careless, and wanton,
As Deep-Dark-Depression-Darius comes on,
High-Mood-Horis cheers, but never stays long,
When he’s with me, I often sing a song!
I’m now far less bucktoothed…
Nine teeth left, so many have rotted,
Starmer’s downfall needs to be plotted,
His sneering attitude is as I expected…
Surely his dishonesty & lies were suspected?
He was, after all, a barrister…
Making him the cleverest liar,
Don’t expect anything from Starmer,
The Labour Party’s principal annihilator,
Keeps saying his Father was a toolmaker,
Inspiring cartoonists & every joke-maker!
A bad night again; again, shooting awake repeatedly.
After a few hours of this, I nodded off again and slept late, for me, anyway, 07:00hrs.
Took off the night bag and made my way to the Porcelain Throne. Huh! Reversal in evacuation style from yesterday. Troskty Terence was back in the lead. No doubt to be closely followed by Constipation Konrad in this afternoon’s visit, or on Saturday morning’s session. That will be interesting. Hahaha!
Carer Ejaz arrived and checked the legs and body; medications were then issued. He was soon gone, off to get the bus.
A lightning-fast wash; why, I nearly got wet. Hehe!
My sense of humour seems to be making a comeback as I type this? (17:10hrs!)
I took a snap of the new day catheter pouch on my leg. I’ve kept it clean. Well, the muslin bag needed a bit of a jiggle to make it comfortable… but that’s my fault. I weakened, responded to the itching on the top strap, with some stern scratching of it. That’s not in the picture, in case any haemophobes see it. Hehe! I noticed that the legs and feet looked a little red this morning. It’s possible that I set the camera to the wrong setting. (I found that I had, later)
I was concentrating on blogging when a mini-seizure struck, leaving me unable to continue for about an hour. Getting regular now! Must tell the Doctor.
The moment I realised it was a food delivery driver over the intercom, I fell into a deep depression. Why? I’ll tell yer all about my second gig shopping cock-up of the week! This one was expected next week, as well as Tuesdays that were expected next Thursday. At least I think that’s right. I was boiling mad at myself! Swore, sulked, cursed a bit more, and considered popping on the balcony and opening a window… Never-mind.
This has brought me to such a low point; I must seek some form of help. I’ll inform the Doctor and the Neurosurgeon at the hospital at our November appointment. How I prayed that 
would visit. But he didn’t. Not until nearly midnight anyway. That was not good timing; his arrival was grand for a few seconds, then the self-hate routine, caused by my stupid mistake, 
kicked in, and he departed. Sleep was unattainable, but I’m going out of sync again. Why am I not in the least surprised?
Crikey, look at all the bags!
I literally had to throw some away to make room for the new food that was incoming.
Cheesy Topped cobs again! No room in the freezer!
Emptying a carrier with more crisps and biscuits in it, I found this article, which, for an unknown reason, I thought I was buying toilet cleaner stickers.
Obviously, judging by the ingredients, which were too small to read (I put the name in Google to find them), they were children’s sweets!
I can’t take much more, I’m losing it big time.
Bottles due…
They were left outside the door.
I meant to put Horis’ rating as 0.05%
My feet were a bit red again. It doesn’t show in the photograph, but the contents of the catheter bag seemed to glow with a luminescent light.
0825hrs: I was just about to serve the meal when Carer Ejaz arrived. I popped it back in the still-warm oven, and Ejaz dished out the medications.
After he’d gone, I served up and started eating the meal, while watching a recorded Heartbeat episode.
¾ of the way through the meal, I realised I’d not photographed it. So, I did.
And I soon demolished the remaining fodder in the dish. Very tasty, I think that showed his appreciation. Because he came over to me for at least five minutes of joy, or his percentage attendance for the day would look even worse.
Today was so depressing overall. 
and 
made the day a misery. I bet you find endless errors in this blog. At one stage, my typing errors outnumbered those I got right. Grammarly was working overtime today. However, 
made it so difficult for me to make the right choices amongst the options it offered. My awareness and grasp of logicality were all to cock!
Really, my worst day for months, and the day went so slowly as well. It often felt like mental torture. I appreciate that this sounds strange, but at least I made it through it. If I have another day like today… Well, let’s hope I don’t.
Typing this on Saturday morning, things, words, are still vague to ascertain. Mistakes galore… But not as bad as yesterday. But not right, not like it usually is… I’m waffling again, Tsk! Sometimes I accept being glaikit, well, the label does fit? Fit? Are seizures linked to this?
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BONUS ODE
This morning, I feel a little less confusion,
I’m almost capable of cerebration!
Here’s to a better day for memory retention,
And the absence of Darius’ Deep Depression,
A riddance to Conrad Constipation,
My next passing is not like tungsten,
Hopes for a better concentration,
I’ve already paid for my cremation…
I’m ready now for my transubstantiation,
Mind & body gone through trucidation,
Waiting for surgery, a trephination,
But without any signs of trepidation…
This Ode takes a deflection,
Worried about the state of the Nation,
Starmer and his demagoguism,
His lies and his indoctrination,
His Labour principles’ evisceration,
His hostage is a sausage interpretation.
Birthed from a toolmaker’s insemination,
No condemnation… just a little imprecation,
I’m working on brewing up a new execration…
To stifle the evil of the leader of our Nation!
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🤎 SALUTATIONS! 🤎
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Night pouch off and emptied.
Took this kitchen shot on my way to utilise the Porcelain Throne. Curious if it will be /constipation Conrad or Trosky Terrence in charge. 
Got even more peas in now! And two orange cream balls, which I put in the fridge.
Naughty beer-battered chips!
Hurrah! Silesian Sausages and Polish Country Sausages. Some smoked pork loin, too.
I put the TV on, on the third try, to take my mind off how I was feeling. Within minutes, the fog, haze, loss of balance, & dizziness started to clear. I don’t want to go through that again. I’d already lost a total of two hours through this new style seizure. Or rather, the coming out of it. Lately, they never seem the same after seizures.
Care Mizra, noticed my right leg has swollen, and the left one has shrunk. He ointmented the right leg. But overall, the Lymphorrhoea in my legs & feet had got a lot better than yesterday’s flare-up.
Early evening view.
A self-taken 3D photo? Haha!
I caught the beautiful late sunset
Then did a zoomed-in 
Not bad at all.
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05:30hrs: Took the nightpouch off, went into the kitchenette, and put the kettle on. Then, the rumbling innards began.
rcelain Throne. Trotsky Terence played no part in the evacuation this morning. Come to think of it, Constipation Conrad didn’t either. 
Started on the blog catch-up, and an hour or so later, the JS delivery arrived. The driver to the bags through to the kitchen for me.
Canned Irish Stew is currently cheaper than at Iceland, Asda, and Aldi. So, I bought a few cans and plan on adding some extra potatoes and Gungo Peas sauce. I use the Milk Roll loaf to soak up the juices. I’m getting carried away again! Flavoured Spring Water, fresh garden peas 
(They’ll go in the Irish stew as well). Cakes, crisps, biscuits, bicarbonate of soda. Got the pod peas into the cooler.
No butter-butter, Iced Coffees for visitors & nurses, sliced red onions, 
washing items; washing up liquid, bleach, laundry softener/freshener. The canned food cupboard was soon filled up! 
The bikkies and cake cupboard were utilised. 10p less than the Iceland ones at 90p each for 6! I admit they are not nice!
The Maryland vegan cookies were available for purchase. I didn’t need them, but they were 35p cheaper than Iceland, 25p cheaper than Asda, and 40p cheaper than Ocado.
six hours ago, but had accidentally put them on the highest setting.
My first real cock-up of the day. Joe took them out and told me to dry them off before they crumble. Well, two-thirds did just that as I tried to dry them. I salvaged seven little spuds and ate them straight away. Put some fresh ones on for tonight’s planned meal. 
I shelled some garden peas and added the remaining potatoes to accompany the Irish Stew and Gung-Po sauce meal later on.
Then, as I was waiting for CorelDRAW to save the file…
, as 
all but had me over. Five minutes later, I felt much better… 
, I was lucky to be where I was when I went over, tatty, scruffy, unkempt, uncomfortable, virus, microorganism, bug, bacterium, bacillus, germ, parasite producing, eyesore-horrendously grungy, disease-fermenting second-hand, beige-coloured, £300, charity shop bought, crumb-retaining, moth-eaten, non-working, itch-encouraging, incommodious, Haemorrhoid Harold testing, catheter tube yanking, recliner. Also, I was with it enough to throw myself at it on my way down.
Not much of the Irish Stew to be seen, I podded a whole packet of garden peas, after shelling them, of course. Hehe! Tasted nice, though!
,
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Dizzy Dennis joined in the sensations as I slowly hobbled, with a degree of balancing difficulty, to the Porcelain Throne. It proved to be a messy and extremely long affair. The time spent cleaning up the limbs, bottom, and porcelain was worse because I kept getting dizzy each time I bent down. 
with her stabbing pains started in the neck this time. And spent three hours touring around my torso. Under the left arm, right chest, centre chest, back to the neck, almost up to the chin, right chest… etc.
I poddled out onto the balcony to take a couple of shots of the view in the rain, through the windows, of course.
I had to take a shot from the end of the balcony as the innards were gurgling and rumbling again. Once again, 
was in control
Back to the balcony to take a window end shot.
. Hehe!
Ejaz was wet from the rain, poor lad. He got the prescription medications sorted for me and reminded me to take the B12 supplement. No Peptac or Cetraben is needed. As Anne Gyna was on a break, the legs, ankles, and feet that had been fed 
to bursting point over the last three weeks are looking great, super-duper! Yee-Haa!
was, for some reason going blurring my sight, almost as bad as she does when I look at the sunshine.
down, the driver arrived. He put them in the kitchenette for me.
As I photographed a selection to go into the fridge, I noticed that Iceland Foods had done it again. 👎🏼The steak slice had a must-be-used-by date of Today!
three from Iceland Foods, the baby potatoes. I had to throw away six of them. (see the photo on the right). They were either split or had black spots near the surface; some had both! 👎🏼When I opened a pack of the shortcake biscuits, they had been ready-pre-crushed for me. The company’s new slogan is Google tells me:
Free delivery, though, as long as you spend £40.
Carer Mizra arrived, also rather damp-looking.
I persevered with this blog. And I got some of the photos uploaded and into the WordPress gallery… this is when, to the best of my knowledge, the first seizure occurred. This was a decent, lengthy one, nothing like the five-hour one I had earlier in the week, but again, I was all over the place mentally and physically when I emerged from it. 
Back on the balcony.
Then, the amazingly dull but still gorgeous sky. Then I’m afraid that things have changed slightly for the worse!
hit me; this was not good.
joined in. Mizra had never seen (or heard) Roger in action before.
call an ambulance. No sooner had he gone than the rain came again. I took a snapshot of it from the closed kitchen window.
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. It was a close call this morning; the instant I bent down, before any contact was made between my bottom and the raised-up WC lid, the torrent shot out! Seconds later, when the contact took place, the evacuation was over, done and dusted! Then I had to clean up the splatterings from my body and the Porcelain furniture. 
, and in doing so, 
had joined in.
I made a double-teabag brew. A Thompson’s Irish Breakfast and a Co-op 99.
up on blogging. (This didn’t happen)
I took this shot of the not-so-pleasant morning from the kitchenette window. First morning without sunshine at 
daybreak for a few days now. Then, dang me, the sun broke through, coming up from behind the building. I caught the Nottingham City Hospital in the next shot.
looked fine. We used the Cetraben cream instead of the Barrier cream yesterday. It seemed to work better.
with Chemist4U, an online pharmacy, and place an order for Cetraben, Medical Olive Oil, and Co-Codemols. 
I got registered after making the order. However, they continued to refuse me and confuse me. First name needed. ‘Go to ‘billing’ and amend. Could I find the Billing Section? No!
and 
, a three-hour-long on-and-off attack started. It’s not the attacks; it’s the coming out of them that gets to me. Also, I’m not getting any warnings before they come nowadays. Baffling.
Couldn’t get a look in! I was just fixated on coping with the aftermath of the mini-seizures and angry that nothing was going right! As it stands, Carer Joe is gone, so there’s no help. Although I’m hoping Carer Ejaz can assist with the mobile.
, I should have said, the lovely retired District Nurse arrived, took a look at, and confirmed that 
my right leg and ankle were now cleared for use. She did say there was some crinkled skin and to be careful not to catch or bang it. And she will call next week to assess the feet. Her bit of caring made a world of difference to me. 🤎🌺 I’d still go nowhere with the blogging; tomorrow looks like a losing, no-chance-of-catch-up-on-the-blogs day.
The landline burst forth its trill sounds. As I reached for it, a no-warning mini-seizure gripped me. I didn’t know who it was until I came around, and they were talking fifteen to the dozen. I’d not got the foggiest of what or who it was for a minute or so. As I regained some of my composure, I explained to the caller why I was not responsive. Of all the callers, it could have been the bank, Matron Julie, no, no Matron Jackie, the police, British Damned Gas, the Doctor, a debt collector, Sister Jane, Warden Julie, Jenny, it was from the Neurosurgeons at the QMC. This was brilliant! For the lady had rang to inquire about the seizure’s nature. Now she knew! She had obviously got a list of questions and went through them all. She was gathering as much detail as possible before the procedure in November to determine the best course of action. She is going to make me an earlier appointment, for September or thereabouts, to see the surgeon and decide what can or needs to be done. She said it’s critical to gain as much knowledge beforehand. Possibly a trephination hole to assess the brain’s neurotransmitter fluids first. I thought that was what they told me weeks ago? Of course, there is a slight possibility that I may have, or might have, got this wrong. Did I forget or have a seizure when on the phone last time? Tsk & Humph!
I made a stew, added some red onion, liquid smoke, Gung Po sauce and garden extra green and black peas. Place it in a microwave-safe dish, ready to add some potatoes after it’s cooked. I was doing well today despite the horrendous nature of the proceedings.
Oh, this is the state of the box that carried the new mobile phone to me. It was delivered by Amazon.
An email from C4U advised me that my order had been cancelled!
pissed off, annoyed, swore and cursed a lot, and now, depression showed its ugly head. It was as if my whole body reacted. 
nearly had me off the chair! Followed seconds later, an outburst of stabbing pains from 
tested my pain tolerance by hitting me in the left foot and left hand at the same time! 
I even enjoyed it. But with so many Accifaupas Whoopsiedangleplops, errors and mistakes, it was inevitable that they kept coming to mind.
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Starting with Nelson Cigarettes,
I stopped smoking when they went up to 3/6!
STUCK IN THE LIFT ON A SUNDAY!
Decent colour
What an ablutioning and medicalisationing visitation this morning. Go wrongable? It did! Huh!
. Then the need for the Porcelain Throne arrived in a bit of a hurry… 
the floor and mats. (Huh!) 
rang out, and Carer Manpreet came in. There I was, starkus, with blood streaming down my head… I had to ask Manpreet to pass me a pair of PPs as I’d run out of them in the wet room. Which she did. I was given the medications, and Manpreet cleaned th
e wound on my right hand where I’d trapped it in a kitchen drawer the other day. The feet seemed a lot 
less filled with oemeba fluids, but they soon refilled again as the day went on… and on, and on. I may not sound happy this morning, there are a few reasons for that. Losing Carer Joe, being the main one. As soon as Manpreet departed, I scurried back into the wet room to continue finishing the shaving.
, the water for washing the feet had gone cold again!
As I began to finish shaving, I’d forgotten about the cuts earlier and swiftly added to the total. Which, as Carer Manpreet had said earlier, added to about twelve. Not now, it’s now sixteen, as far as I can gather. These, along with the three in gash from the other day, make me want to take the advice of Tim Price, and go ‘caveman!’
what I would usually leave till last. Little Inchies fungal lesion ointmentating. I was trying to be careful with the dropper… but dropped it! What a Plonker! 
It is only a tiny bottle, but all the liquid flowed away on the floor before I could get 
down to retrieve it… 
the thenar space this time, with a plaster. A good job; I keep some medications in stock for emergencies, just in case of any accidental injuries, falls, or walking into a door. Tsk!
they were cleaned, creamed and treated.
Made infinitely worse because each bout from
