Where hope would once prevail

This morose rubbish was penned by Inchcock when he was at his lowest.

Having just missed a second appointment at his Dentists!

It flowed from his now even-more depressed mind easily. Too easily.

But, the old fool still posted it. Bless the poor old twit!


Where hope would once prevail

Where hope would once prevail,

Now there’s not even a contrail,

I’m  not exactly hearty & hale,

My failings, oh, I so want to wail,

My hopes have begun to pale!

Overweight, I’ll never be a Chippendale,

I believe I was born to fail,

Will my fortunes improve, my good flail?

No, more chance of finding the Holy Grail!

My good luck, I store under a fingernail,

My Accifauxpas, ever-grow in scale,

As my body does, it looks like a whale!

Whoopsidangleplops arrive, like a gale,

Worries, fretting, now no sleep to avail,

Still, it’s given me time to write this sorry sad, tale!

If anyone want to buy it, it’s for sale!

Evenin’ all!

Inchcock Today: Mon Sept 9 2019: Whoopsiedangleplops, catastrophes, malfunctions, bungles, Accifauxpas… you name it! Humph!

2019 Sept 09

2019 Sept 09

Monday, September 9th 2019

Icelandic: Mánudaginn 9 September 2019

03:30hrs: I had not much in the way of sleep. But since being woke up last night, it seemed to be all dream-filled. Yet apart from sensing they were not pleasant ones, I can recall no details at all. I hate it when that happens. Hehe!

I struggled out of the Brother-in-Law Pete damaged, £300, second-hand, near-dilapidated, gungy-beige coloured, c1968, sometimes working, uncomfortable, rickety, recliner to take a wee-wee in the GPSB (Grey-Plastic-Salvation-Bucket), it was of the USBUWSS (Ultra-Slow-But-Uncontrollable-Weak-Sprinkly) variety. So, some cleaning up was needed afterwards. Off to the wet room. Where on the spur-of-the-moment, I also got the ablutions tended to.

WD 150.0.0 The dropsies were plentiful, the toothbrush (twice), shaving foam can, soap, razors several times, shower head… and I even managed afterwards, to drop the flaming fearful sock-glide! However, it fell to the ground without coming into contact with any part of my body! Smugness-Mode-Adopted!

Got dressed, and off to the kitchen. Made a brew and took the medications. Back to the wet room, to satisfy the precipitant need for the Porcelain Throne.

WD 150.0.0 Another, ‘Argh, wait for the kerplonk’ jobbie. I felt the splashback hitting my rear quarters! Yes, a massive torpedo. A smidge of bleeding, but I think, considering the colossal size of the evacuated article, the blood would only have been from Harold’s Haemorrhoids, so no worry there. I did take an extra Codeine 30g, to ease the pains from the high-pressured evacuation leaving some soreness, and the lump on the bonce, from yesterday’s head-walloping affair, still stinging.

WD 150.0.0 I started to do the blog updating…

Virgin 128.0.0

WD 150.0.0 I didn’t get very far with it, the finger-ends were troublesome as well… then:

Virg 150.0.0

Oh, dear, not again! It took no end of messing around and time getting it to work still. Although, I think it came back, of its own accord in the end. More time lost! Thank you, Mr (overpaid, incompetent) Fries.

I’ve no idea why I did this, but while the internet was working, I made up a Morrison order, for delivery for Wednesday 18th, twixt 06:00 > 07:00hrs.

Before I could start on the blog again correctly, the Ocado delivery arrived. They are the only supplier who sells the Glengettie Gold tea bags, the Soulful Vegetarian Chilli and the brown Sicilian tomatoes. All of which I adore! 

1Mon06The head was getting me more pain now! Just thought I’d mention it.

The brown tomatoes, some of which I will treat the Sturmscharfhreress and Fashion Model Wardens to, are so delicious tasting!

I cut some up straight away, and added some sliced up (on the new tomato slicer, Swaging head here), and in the saucepan with the Soulful vegetarian chilli, adding some black bean sauce, and left it all to marinate! Ohh, the smell! Mmm!

The polish sourdough sliced loaf, I split and wrapped into packs of five or slices, and put into the freezer.

Pictured here, is the rather thick end-slice from the Sourdough loaf. Hehehe! But it will come in very handy for dunking in the chilli later. Oh, yes! What is in this vegetarian chilli, you ask? Well, here’s the ingredients listing:

Chopped Tomato, Water, Green Jackfruit 12% [Green Jackfruit, Water, Salt, Citric Acid], Carrot, Sweetcorn 4%, Celery, Red Pepper, Onion, Borlotti Beans 2%, Red Kidney Beans 2%, Black Eye Beans 2%, Pumpkin Seeds, Tomato Puree, Garlic Puree, Gluten-Free Flour [Rice, Potato, Tapioca, Maize, Buckwheat], Sugar, Lemon Juice, Rapeseed Oil, Vegetable Stock [Salt, Rice Flour, Cane Sugar, Onion, Yeast Extract, Celery, Carrot, Spices, Sunflower Oil, Mushrooms, Herbs, Vegetable Juice, Pumpkin, Lovage, Garlic], Chipotle 6%, Cumin, Smoked Paprika, Tamari [Water, Soya Bean, Salt, Spirit Vinegar], Oregano, Coffee, Cinnamon, Black Pepper, Chilli 0.05%, Smoke Flavour. Blimey!

And I added the brown tomatoes and black bean sauce! I think this is what I put in the last time I had some. I recall really enjoying and getting high on it! Hehehe! Mind you, that said, something is lurking in my memory concerning constipation, or is it more likely diarrhoea? Oh, dearie me!

Crikey, the time has flown. I’ll have to get going to the Untersturmführeresses holding-cell and interrogation and telling-off of Gerry room (office), now located in the Winwood Court Foyer, to hand the nibbles and treats over. I have a large bag of recyclable stuff I’ll take down at the same time. I might nip up ad take some photographicalisations from the Winwood rooftop as well. I’ll return in a bit.

I’m back! Bet you were worried about me being gone for so long? I went down and out to the caretaker’s room and deposited the bag nearby. I went back in through the side door, and Malc, or is it, Steve, the caretaker, was in his snug little room. We had a natter, I offered him some brown tomatoes, but I could see he was not in the least enamoured by them. A meat man, no doubt. Haha! It transpired, that he too is on Liberty-Global Virgin Media internet, and has been suffering problems, too! Fancy that!

I went through the link-passage to the Winwood Court lobby. I tried the door out to the benches, but it was still working. Then made my way to the Standartenfhreress Wardens Office. No Deana, but Julie and Mitchell (I think) were in. Handed out the nibbles and treats and we had a little gossip and laugh.

Then went up in the dedicated rooftop lift.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

6Sat21The top room was not being used. Shame, it is lovely comfortable and snuggly warm in there, too. A delight to have for the new tenants, a giant crossword was partly done on one of the tables.

I snapped the pictures in between diving for cover a few times, when the rain poured.

5Fri007I came back down in the lift. No one about.

It was eerie walking through the link-passage, but Ray and his sin soon came walking in the other direction, I was introduced to his lad.

There were no other signs of life when I got to the lift foyer in Woodthorpe Court.

1Mon14Nor, in the elevator, or on the twelfth-floor lobby. When I went into the lightless hallway to the three flats that share that corner, I almost had to feel my way along to find the door. Haha!

I got in, and got the kettle on, and made a brew of the Glengettie Gold tea, and stirred the saucepan of vegetarian chilli.

Then got on with updating this blog. But the time was passing so quickly today. I went on the WordPress reader.

No time for Facebooking or updating picture galleries. Must get nosh sorted out and my head down ASAP. As tomorrow will need me to leave for the After-Stroke torture-session by 07:00hrs, if I get up in time. How I’ll get any work done on the blog, I don’t know.

Pretty fed-up with how long things are taking nowadays. I’m going to get the fodder and get my head down.

WD 150.0.0 I went into the kitchen and the heat under the chilli – and the phone rang! The pharmacist wanted to deliver the prescriptions tonight! Everyone and thing are plotting against my getting enough or even any sleep! I explained to him about my having to leave in the morning for 07:00hrs to get to the After-Stroke session in time. I asked if he would be here for 17:00hrs, please? I got a very worrying “Something like that!” back from him.

With Josie, Herbert and the ailments doing an excellent job of giving me sleep deprivation, I do not need any other help! So, I’ll just have to try and keep awake long enough for the bloke to arrive.

At times, life can get so annoying.

I turned off the heat under the chilli and got back on the computer. I might fight the fatigue and somnolence long enough if I try to create some graphics on CorelDraw, I suppose. Huh! So, I had a go, praying I’d stay awake long enough. Ah, well! 

Amazingly, the chemist’s young Asian lady arrived an hour later with the prescriptions, bless her cotton socks. I thanked her and explained things. So, back to plan C, to get the chilli and the head down. I hope!

1Mon14aThis is the Soulfood vegetarian chilli, with the added vinegar, brown tomatoes and black bean sauce, that was the evening nosh. The chunk of Polish Sourdough, and a mini-bottle of fresh orange juice. This scrumptious, delectable, highly palatable feast was all eaten up. Amidst the belching and passing of wind afterwards, I thought it deserved a favour rating of 9.3/10!

Washed the pots, did the handwashing, and got settled in the Brother-in-Law Pete damaged while he was flat-sitting, when I was in hospital, as he fitted new CCTC cameras, and searched for my valuables, which he found and took, I still haven’t got them back yet four-months later, £300, second-hand, recliner.

The gogglebox was put on when I realised that despite the drowsiness, heavy eye-lids, and plain tiredness, that sleep was not too keen on coming.

WD 150.0.0 The thoughts of tomorrow’s activities and tasks kept the brain far too active, for me to nod-off. ‘What time do I need to leave to get to the After-Stroke Physio session?’ ‘Do I walk it there again, it will take two-hours?’ – ‘Should I catch a number 40 bus to town?’ – ‘Ought I to go really early, and go to Tesco to try and get some of the flakey Polish fingers?’ – ‘Do I have the right amount of change for the £2.30 bus fare?’ – ‘Will I get through the Physio session unharmed, and feeling fit enough afterwards?’ – ‘Did I turn off the taps (faucets) in the bathroom?’ Reluctantly, I could not help but get up to check out the wet room…

WD 150.0.0 One of the finest toe-stubbings was suffered en route. And yet, the pain was so minimal, when I thought I ought to be in agony, all I felt was a tiny bit of discomfort. By the time I’d checked the taps and lights had not been left on and was exiting the door – the belated toe agony did come! Humph!

WD 150.0.0 Back in the Brother-in-Law Pete damaged, £300, second-hand, near-dilapidated, gungy-beige coloured, c1968, sometimes working recliner, the foot was rested on high on the back of a chair, to ease the now throbbing digit… and Colin Cramps joined in the action!

I could have cried with frustration!


Winwood Heights Upgrading Progress – The truth! Humph!

The upgrading of the two 1964 built blocks, Winchester and Woodthorpe Court, and the new Extra-Care block being constructed between the current ones. I just could not help to do a graphic, and put it under (below) the bit I clipped from the NCH page, for a laugh!

I just had to release my frustrations with a giggle-graphic. Haha!

It’s no good them suing me!

I’m nearly broke.

On the bink of snuffing it.

Most of it is true anyway!

I enjoyed making this graphic so much.



This is how things were this week in my apartment after works had taken place:

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Without Jenny’s help, I’d have been in a pickle, cause no one else was showing any interest much in my problems.

It will be months yet until it is all done.

So much more mayhem to get through, yet!

So much for the quiet relaxing old age life!


Plastering Done to the Balcony Windows – What an absolute Mess, shambles and heartbreaking pickle they left me in. Sob!


Tuesday 3rd April 2018

I would like to thank Nottingham City Homes, Willmott-Brown and their Sub-Contractors for arriving out of the blue this morning, just as I was leaving to catch the bus.

The chappy-man-plasterer asked if he could do the plastering on the Balcony Window now, as he had had cancellations.

So, I said yes. Left the door unlocked and toddled off.

Here is what I came back to find.

Duodenal Duncan is now giving me more hassle than it has ever done!

I spent hours trying to clean up the mess, but it would not have it. It remains being spread about from one room to another every time I walk anywhere.

No one is interested! Apart from me, that is. But I am feeling too poorly to even swear about it!




I am not happy and feeling so fed-up, I don’t think I could feel anymore Fed-upable!

Inconcinnity, depression and intolerance are growing within me!

It has to be said!

Inchcock Today – Wednesday 15th November 2017: Had to install new Firefox – Had to reset all of the defaults on CorelDraw – due to cock-ups from that Nottingham Pensioner Twit!

Wednesday 15th November 2017

Ukranian: Середа, 15 листопада 2017

0100hrs: Gave up trying to sleep anymore. A good job I’m an algophilist (Not really), cause the nocive condition of various parts of this obese-body I have to lumber around with me was giving me grief last night, and this morning.

The thighs (No idea what’s causing this) seemed tight muscled and stiffened in seconds of no activity. The regular attendees Duodenal Donald, Anne Gyna and Arthur Itis, are a bit frisky too. Still, on the plus side, no Dizzy Dennis’s or Hernia Harold bother.

Out of the £300 second-hand recliner, the toes hurt the moment I stood up. Only to be expected with the toe-stubbing I gave them last night.

Off to the Porcelain Throne. Harold’s Haemorrhoids were not bleeding anywhere near as bad as Tuesday, and the back pain has eased off well. Made a cuppa, took the medications, with another ADRC capsule, for things were still a bit messy. Haha!

Much rubbing in of the pain gel took place.

Did the health checks:

0200hrs: Sorted the photos from yesterday and started to update Tuesday’s post. During which, I needed to work on a graphic to use.  Opened CorelDraw and found that for some reason or other, all the fills I did were coming out as 50% transparent? I had to take off transparency manually each time. I got onto the Corel Help page on the web. After following as best, I could, all the instructions this did not solve the issue. But I did come across advice on how to revert to Default settings for Transparencies. Close-down and open up again holding F8 down. So I tried it. Oh, ‘eck!

It put everything back to Default settings! I had to start from scratch going through setting it all up as I wanted it. I’ve still not got everything done, and it is annoying cause the things I’ve set again in preferences are in different places, and of course, there are many that I have not used yet and will find I’ve got to do many more changes I’m sure.

Got this job done at: wait for it… 0755hrs. Yes, nearly eight hours lost. I bet things like this happen to everyone. But I haven’t heard of anyone doing it. Hehehe! Wot a Plonka!

Got on with updating of the diaries again, and the lads outside started their hoist going, with the accompanying clattering and noise from the blow-torches or whatever they call them.

Minutes later the massive clump and rattle were heard as the hoist come platform stopped right outside of the window.

The noise was awful as they had all that metal to cut off and holes to fill-in.

At the same time, the drilling started from the flat to my right, and the one above as the engineers were fitting, I assume, the radiators in those apartments.

All necessary work mind, if we are to get modernised. A cacophony of essentiality! I like that I might use it somewhere later. Hehehe!

Got yesterday’s diary done and posted, and went on Facebooking.

Blimey, it’s 1030hrs already, Danged CorelDraw Whoopsiedangleplop!

Did some more WordPress reading.

I checked the Emails.

1100hrs: Made another small mug of extra-strong tea and was about to start on some graphicalisationing.

Guess what happened?

I got a message telling me about the latest Firefox. How it was 3-times faster than Chrome and had added features.

Like a fool, I downloaded it and then installed it.

It is slower than the one I was using, and of course, finding things will take extra time now they moved and altered stuff about.

The constant grinding from outside, and drilling an banging inside has produced a mother of a headache for me. It must be worse for some of the younger tenants and those who cannot take their hearing-aids out.

The place is vibrating now. Hehe!

Ah, the lads have broken for their lunch – I hope they have a long one.

Back to the CorelDraw Graphics, with hopes that I can find my way around it alright.

Gawd blimey, the thighs and knees are terrible when I get to stand up and walk. A bit fretfull about this, or rather, what is causing it.

1305hrs: Clang, bang, drill, shake, shudder… the lads are back off of there lunch hour. Tsk! Bless em!

Made another cuppa and took a pain-killer.

Letters arrived through the post box. Exciting selection; This one on the left for Tree Services and Maintenance. A good idea that was, delivering up here – I’m sure they’ll get a lot of trade from us. Haha! The other one was from the Deep Vein Thrombosis Clinic with the INR Warfarin blood test results.

I got one Diary top photo done and then went onto creating one for the TFZer site.

Looking a bit glum now, and it isn’t late either.

I hope that the workers outside are going to pack up soon, as it is definitely getting too dark to work safely, methinks.

Good ‘heavens, the workmen are busy right above me now. Thudding, drilling, banging, clunking, drilling. Ah-well!

1625hrs: Got the TFZer graphic completed. It took longer than expected due to the new set-up confusing me. Hehe!

Got the oven on to cook the bacon in later. Bacon, seasoned tomatoes and home baked (Well heated up part-cooked ones, Hehe!) cobs (I hope if I get them right).

Did the Health Checks, pain-gelling and took the Medications.

Posted the picture off to the TFZer site and closed down and got the nosh served up.

Canned tomatoes seasoned with balsamic vinegar and basil. Smoked bacon was done in the oven, and I made sure it was not too crisp.

I had to be cunning with the part-cooked cobs though, to get them a little less hard. I warmed them through and sprinkled some olive oil on them and returned them to the oven for a couple of minutes. It didn’t work, but at least I tried. Hehehe!

The noises from outside, the clanging of metal on metal started after the workmen had ceased working.

Then, after washing up the pots and settling in the chair, the damned phone started ringing. I was sure it would be that Pizza guy again, so put the headphones on loud listening to the TV, and watched the ringing-light on the phone. He rang at least eight times. Tsk!

I think, after the hectic day of Whoopsiedangleplops, noise and stress, I must have been exhausted, for I nodded off within minutes.

Inchcock today: Friday 24th Feb 2017:

Friday 24th February 2017

Mongolian: 24 Хоёрдугаар сарын 2017

After the maintenance men came and woke me up last night at 1125hrs, they were gone by midnight after telling me they could do nothing, but they would send someone around in the morning to look at the leaking kitchen window and screw if closed. How I clean the outside after that I don’t know. They are very good at this, getting out of doing anything and sounding knowledgeable at the same time, you know. So I stayed up on the computer all night.

So I stayed up on the computer all night. I tried to use the WordPress G-Suite but ended up having to contact their helpline again, and after a few hours was no closer to a solution than I was before. Tsk!

I tried around 0340hrs to clean up the mess still left from the floods and realised about 0430hrs what a Plonka, I am… They will only make another mess when they come won’t they? I felt a little like a Punchinello, physically and mentally.

Made a note to remind me to call BJ to tell him about my nor being able to attend the Tenant’s Social Hour again and why. Must ask him if he can call on me, so I can give him the nibbles to hand out, and show him the message about a trip out from the Papplewick Pumping Station.

gc-01dThen, around 0555hrs, I got on with finishing yesterday’s post and then started this one off. Had to limp to the porcelain and was well pleased that the bleeding from Little inchy had stopped – but Haemorrhoid Harry had started. Cleaned my lower regions and the bowl up medicated the rear end and proceeded to feel a little sorry for myself again.

I loathe myself for self-pitying, but even I find it hard to take so many Whoopsiedangleplops so often and continuously as of the last few days. I pondered on what had occurred over the last two day: Crippled myself going to and getting onto and off of the Nottingham Wheel, cut my finger, burnt my hand, flooded the wetroom, lost my notepad, got the day wrong for the cleaners and the clinic on the same day, Little Inchy bleeds started again after weeks of no bother, new pains in the hip, rain coming in through the kitchen window and flooding that, had to turn off the heater cause it got in that too. the batteries ran out on the same day to toothbrush and radio, got overcharged at the shop, got on the wrong bus, sleep has become an impossibility, broke the thermometer, the repairmen arrived at nearly midnight to wake me up to look at the leaking kitchen window that they could do nothing with but arranged for others to call today to ‘screw it in place’? Got demand for a second TV licence, got told off eight times by Olive, No one told me the Tenant’s Meeting had changed from Thur to Fri – and now I can’t get to that! (Well I might if they come really early?) Hobbled painfully up into Mapperley to get some vegetables and lost a tenner somehow… there’s probably more, but these just came to mind yer know.

Took my medications, made a cuppa and just had to sigh and smile to myself when I dropped the milk as I had a dizzy spell, bent to pick up the handily placed mop from the bucket I’m left ready for the rain to come in again and the mop broke in half!!! These Whoopsiedangleplops are getting beyond a joke now, surely they must ease off soon?

Oh, and a letter from the Bank arrived yesterday, it is in the process of being sold off, so I have to consider moving the cash to another one to be on the safe side, Olive advises me. Another job to get done… Will it never end! I beseech the Lord to save my sanity before I become unhinged, and to please save my rationale… oh that sounded good didn’t it? Cheered missen up a bit now. Hehehe!

Another cup of strong tea and then did the health checks. The pulse has gone back down nicely.

Carried out the ablutions, made anther cuppa and rang BJ, no answer, though.

Worked on a new Excel sheet for the Health Checks for an hour or two, hard work when you’re not sure what you’re doing. Haha! Got it done in a fashion.

I rang BJ again, still no answer.

Tried to do some work on a poem, but the concentration wasn’t there.

Once more I rang BJ, he was at the Social meeting. I explained the situation and asked him to inform the others.

Got the vegetables in the slow cooker.

Felt a bit frustrated still, I can’t go out to take the rubbish bins out, go to the shop, visit Olive or anything because the maintenance men who said they would arrive between 0800 > 1200hrs and who came at midnight on their last visit to tend to the kitchen window may arrive at any time? (They didn’t though)

Got the meal going, battered sausages, veg, an apple and a potato. Took a photograph of it, but once again the unfathomable Photo Genie Gremlin removed it from the SD card??? Humph!

Cleaning up after the meal, the Whoopsiedangleplops returned – I’d left the saucepan on the heat while eating and the pan was burnt beyond salvation, I tried to clean it along with the other accoutrements and managed with great ease to cut my Arthur Itis ridden finger end while cleaning the apple divider. But it was a poor effort, hardly bled at all: Perhaps the Whoopsies are easing up in severity? I do hope so.


Companionless and feeling uncherished (although understandably so, hehe!) I WordPressed and did some graphicalisationing for hours, waiting, hoping the maintenance men would not arrive late at night. I needn’t have worried, they didn’t come at all.

TV on, dare not use the headphones in case I didn’t hear the door chime if anyone arrived, so had to watch programmes that had subtitles… not that it mattered, I’d been up for over 20 hours by then, and needed sleep and fell off into the land of nod quickly.

A few words about British Gas and why they are incompetent but most accomplished liars!


British Gas, several weeks ago sent me a charge in my name and address for electricity on a numbered meter that does not exist. Not here anyway!

This worried me.

Warden Deana rang them for me, and an hour and a half later – they informed her the account would be closed.

This still worried me.

A few weeks later, they sent the same bill again.

Warden Julie rang them but didn’t get anywhere with them despite her most valiant efforts.

Due to my high-EQ, this continued to worry me.

The following (Last) Monday, Deana rang them and was again told the account would be closed.

I didn’t believe them!

Today (Saturday), I get the same bill in Red this time through the door once more!

I’m so anxious about this, and angry at British Gas, and intend as soon as I can, to change Electricity supplier to a competent one, if one exists?

I’ll take the bill to Warden Deana again… and asked her to sort it again for me this coming Monday.

With my health, I can do without this stress!




Nottingham City Homes: Part Two: Repairs Guide for New Senior Citizens in Indepedendant Living flats

Nottingham City Homes Repairs: Part Two:


Guide for New Senior Citizens in Indepedendant Living flats


0001aaFellow Senior Citizens please be warned. If you have the annoying habit like what I do, that of wanting to clean your kitchen window outside and in; Here is what you will have to contend with. Especially if you live in Woodthorpe or Winchester Court in Sherwood Nottingham.

I recommend that the following are stocked up on prior to the life threatening procedure is attempted:

  • Antiseptic disinfectant and creams. (The Dettol disinfectant and the Savlon Cream are effective)
  • Elastoplast fabric and Waterproof dressing. Elastoplast is fairly good. (Although Asda own label is a lot cheaper)
  • TCP and or Brute After Save: (Both are effective at stopping the bleeding abrasions you’ll acquire whilst trying to turn and hold out the control button, conveniently located in the less than 2″ gap between the mechanism and the outer frame of the window) The Brute deodorant in spray form lasts longer and allows you remember the Henry Cooper ‘Slash it All Over’ made commercials on TV from 1970.
  • 0001abA pair of Long-pronged Pliers is another most essential requirement. Either from ScrewFix or preferably the Pound Shop. Both will break when you try to attach them to the plastic button to turn and hold out the button using one hand, as you will need the other Arthritic hand to turn the window around to access the rust, bits of paint and stale water as it flows out of the frame and spills all over the sill, floor, cooker and you!
  • A note you must write before beginning this suicidal cleaning session. Along with your Anticoagulation Alert Card. Your medical record card to inform the paramedics when they arrive of your ailments and medications Medicsyou’re on, like: 

    Warfarin 3mg (Variable according to weekly INR blood tests) 1½ to 3½ –

    Pentoxifylline Blood flow 1 mornings – 1 noon – 1 evenings.

    Paracetamol 500mg pain relief up to 8 a day as needed – Codeine Phosphate 30mg pain relief up – 2 mornings, 1 evening and more if required – Simvastatin 40mghigh cholesterol 1 at night – Omeprazole 2omg – Oesophagus, Duodenal ulcer and sticking reflux valve. 1 mornings – The Ramipril 12mg Angiotensin High blood pressure – 10mg –  1 daily – The Bisoprolol 2.5mg fumarate – Beater-blocker – Control for having mechanical Heart-Aorta valve replaced – 1 daily – Ear-spray for outer ear – as required up to three times a day – Pain Killing Gel 10% Ibuprofen Fenbid  – Up to four times a day as necessary. – GTN sublingual tablets Up to four a day no more; contain the active ingredient glyceryl trinitrate. Do not forget to mention your liquid medications

The Nottingham City homes coordinator will humanely mention your predicament to the repairs department, and when you get back from the hospital, week two weeks after getting back, you will receive a letter from them with an appointment for three weeks hence, for a specialist repair man to call and assess the situation.

He will arrive and set to work looking a the window. After a few err’s and Mmm’s, he will tell you he is condemning the whole window, and will arrange for a new one to replace it.

This will please you greatly.P1020888

A week later, you will receive another arrange appointment trough the post, for three week time.

Another man will arrive, look at the window, and tell you there is nothing wrong with it at all.

You will inform him of the rust and concrete along with the stale water that fell out of the window when you finally managed to get it to turn so you could clean the glass.

He says: Well if you got it turned what’s the problem then?

Your reply is: “The rust and concrete along with the stale water that fell out of the window when you finally managed to get it to turn so you could clean the glass, and I needed three stitches and extra Trental and Warfarin tablets for two weeks!”

He clicks his tongue, gives a loud Humph, offers you a well-practised sneer and leaves.

End of repairs then!

Part Three to follow: The Electric Fire and the Wall Heaters Fiasco!

Inchcock Today Mon 11 Jan 16: Muddled and Befuddled, Confused and Insanitary! Hehe!

Monday 11th January 2016


I woke up after a decent kip and dreams, and immediately chanted my mantra; “That today things will be better, pleasant, less hassle and problems will get solved!”

Then, I visited the porcelain. Little Inchy, was not bleeding too bad at all. Anne Gina bothersome, though. The ulcer was playing up a bit, but not as bad as yesterday yet. The reflux valve was poorly a bit later on, too.

Made a cuppa and started the laptop.The green notification came on the screen telling me it needed to restart to install updates. Selected the restart now button.

The green notification came on the screen telling me it needed to restart to install updates. Selected the restart now button.

I read the newspaper from yesterday all the way through.

Two hours later the full green screen telling me it was restarting remained there.

So, I nipped into the kitchen and washed the pots from last evening.

The full green screen was telling me the laptop was restarting remained there. 

Three hours later I was well moronic ridden and peed off with this. Frustration grew. Not sure what to do, I force closed the laptop. (With my fingers crossed)

It was taking ages to load.applied for the position of a British Railway Goods Van Guard,

Made another cup of tea and took me medications. Applied for the post of a British Railway Goods Van Guard,

The sign on screen appeared and thus I signed in.

I put the TV on while waiting.

An eon or so later it loaded. With my recent luck, I didn’t get excited about this.

A message came up telling me the Firewall was not active? So I chose one of the options, that was to start the MacAfee Firewall.

It loaded Windows.

Not bad eh? 4.5 hours to get the laptop going; but of course, more problems followed… Google Chrome, the screen appeared, but it would not load my home page. Tried opening WordPress and the same failure.

If I lose the internet, along with all my other hassle, I might nip out and over the balcony.

I had another look at the demands from FraserBrown, the nasty solicitors, had sent me. Decided I do need help with this one, and actually, I prayed Steve would reply to me email pleading for some. And he would be free to come and help me out, again.

The Google Chrome started up and working at last. Phew!

Started this diary off.

Not a good start to the day was it? Humph!

Did some FaceBooking.

Received an email from Steve Age UK. He’s to call to see me at 1600hrs. So by the time he deciphers the messages and demands from the solicitor, it will be too late to call them (FraserBrown) to confirm or question anything. 

I watched some episodes of ‘Due South’, to cheer myself up.

P1020841Got the nosh ready, Oven chips and Szynka Gotowana on Baltana sour bread sandwiches.

Made too much, but enjoyed what I managed to eat.

Rated this one at 9.3/10.

The Morrisons delivery arrived. I stored the fodder away.

Fell asleep doing the crossword.

I woke to Steve’s ringing of the internal phone to let me know he’d arrived.

He set to straight away absorbing the letter and questionnaire from FraserBrown.

Afte much searching of my file, I think we found all that was required for the buyers solicitors eight questions to be replied to sufficiently.

P1020842Steve then wrote in the responses on the question form.

He even put the full sheets in an envelope and posted it to me on his way out.

I felt a lot better after we’d spent over an hour studying and responding to the animals… I mean solicitors demands.

Crossed fingers again that we have done it right this time, enough to satisfy them all.

Steve is going to arrange for an Age UK Trusted Plumber to mend the boiler and drain the system of water. This has to be done, to validate the Empty Property insurance ASAP. More Hassle! He would need a key, to give to the plumber to use, and I didn’t have one anymore. So I rang Sister Jane’s Pete and asked if I could fetch the key he kept safe for me tomorrow. No: Tuesday is their shopping day so they will be busy, and they are going out to a concert in the evening.

So I’ll have to go and pick it up on Wednesday morning.

Steve had brought the paperwork from the Budget Insurance I’d just taken out on the old house. All, wait for it… 44 pages!

Seems we need to provide proof of this and forward it to both the solicitor and the insurance company when done. About arranging the boiler repair, water off, etc. The hassle grows!

To the WC, and found myself singing? Good that!

Must remember the Wilko delivery today, no, tomorrow.

Did some crosswords drank much tea then I fell asleep.

Inchcock Today Wed 25 Nov 15: Huh!

Wednesday 25th November 2015

Woke at 0220 hrs, depressed and feeling sorry for missen over yesterdays Woes and cock-ups.

The house sale being put on hold once again is really frustrating, as twice the solicitors who have put the stop on, have informed me that all they need to progress has been received, my going down twice to talk with them and getting soaking wet in the process, and as I say being assured they have all they need now to progress – this third stoppage and their demanding a valid passport and or driving licence with photo – and my not having either – yet I explained this to the woman at reception in the offices on my last visit and she phoned someone and got a call back, then she told me if I supplied my NI number on an official document that would suffice. I had a wage slip, the last one where I got my redundancy pay and she photocopied it – I AGAIN asked her if she had everything needed to progress now, she assured me they had AGAIN.

Then getting the letter yesterday telling me everything had stalled because I had not supplied a valid passport or driving licence and must get in touch with them urgently.

Then I told Deana the flats coordinator who had called to check my health-alert wristband, and she rang them (The comically called Solicitors FraserBrown) for me and got an answer-phone. It’s very frustrating – no, bloody frustrating!

I could do with someone with a bit more umph than I, going with me for a fourth (Or is it fifth now?) time and trying to sort out once and for all what’s what here!

Now, I await an answer from Steve Age UK – not much chance of that I fear for some reason. Or the so-called solicitors getting back in touch with Deana and Deana getting in touch with me… and a plan of action designed… or summat!?!

Made a cuppa, but I’m feeling morose and bitter.

I called Steve UK no answer – left a message asking him for advice. (Fool that I am, I actually expect I might get some, but not yet…)

Laptop on finished Tuesday’s diary. Then started this off, but with little enthusiasm. I feel so depressed again now, convinced I cannot win whatever I do and am doomed to failure frustration and desperate measures. Sorry, but that is how I feel.

Desperately need progress, good news and or a bit of good fortune here if I am not going to lose it.

Steve Age UK is so busy with other clients so to speak. At least he’s helped me get out of the old place and avoid the yobs, but into all this bother with the selling of the house. Deana is trying for me, but the solicitors FraserBrown of Friar Lane Nottingham that the Nottingham Building Society engaged for me to use are just not being helpful at all, each time I tell them I have not got a valid passport or driving licence… then they assure me they have everything needed when I asked the specific question of the receptionist and am assured I get on a high, only to be brought down again with another letter like the one yesterday demanding what they have already demanded to progress with the sale, and down I go again. Help of some sort must be available, I’m not sure I can cope with so many let-downs, oh sod-it.

Now today, I have to wait in, just in case someone calls to explain the storage heaters to me. Not that I have any interest in doing anything anyway, other than involved with the damned solicitors and getting the sale of the house moving again… See, I’m back on this subject again. This is doing me health no good, although I don’t seem bothered about that, it suddenly has little value or worth to me now – I might ring someone up for real help with me mind going warped? But who?

I made another cuppa and took me medications, plenty of them around, can they be the answer? Hehe!

No point in writing when I feel like this really, I’m only going to moan and moan and feel sorry fer missen

0350 hrs now. I’ll write more when some good, or at east neutral news arrives.

Got an email from Deana the coordinator saying she asked the FraserBrown woman who is supposedly dealing me house sale if a bus pass would suffice as picture ID? She didn’t know (Fraser Brown strike again?) but would ring back.

That was yesterday, Deana told me via email reply that she’s still waiting to hear from FraserBrown so called solicitors of Friar Lane in Nottingham.

I had a good bath and shave – only one cut today, I’m getting better… well the hands are shaking less despite me being uptight.

Did a mammoth sneeze when coming out of the warm bathroom into the cold hallway – one of hearing aids I’d just put back in popped out!

Even I managed to laughed at this Whoopsiedangleplop… then again when I struggled to get up after bending down to retrieve it. Haha! Can’t have this laughing in case FraserBrown the imitation solicitors get to hear of it. (Oh I’m getting sarky now!)

Checked the thermometer in the kitchen, and it’s up to 58ºf.

For some reason I thought about the mystery disappearance of me Dixon of Dock Green DVD and had another look around for it – humph!

The mail arrived, two for Margaret the previous tenant, two for the Dynamic Nottingham Pensioner… me.

The INR Warfarin blood level results and new doses. INR is down to 1.7 and the doses increased.

The other one was from Nottingham City Homes re the visit I’d stayed indoors all day for someone who was calling today to advise me on how the storage heaters are controlled properly – to inform me that someone would be calling on Wed 9th December between 12.30 > 1630 hrs to advise me on how the storage heaters are controlled properly. Tsk! No problem I’ll have croaked out with pneumonia by then! Hehe!

Fell asleep and when I woke up an hour or two later, I decided, feeling down a bot still, I’d cheer missen up and watch me Life on Mars DVD, not watched it for years now.

I tried to get the slot thingy in the TV to accept the DVD – only two buttons on the DVD slot, pressed the in different combinations and eventually the missing Dixon of Dock Green DVD came slowly out of it!

P1020516I put it in the box with the other DVD and inserted the Mars DVD – eventually getting it going after much guesswork with the remote control thingamajig.

Got the DVD going and fell sleep again. could I get it (the DVD) out of the TV again? I imagine this is what happened with the Dixon DVD earlier?

I couldn’t see any eject button on the remote? Toshiba are tosh! Played again with the buttons, got into a TV mode I knew nowt about – turned it off and on again, more buttons tried and the DVD still remains in the slot?

Made a cuppa and then checked emails to find another one from Deana.


More professional confidence boosting message from the farcical solicitors FraserBrown Incompetents, and no apology!

They’ve certainly mucked me about, lied to me and given me many nervous and worrying sessions. I just hope that this time they do not change their minds again… The Sneezlegobbling nerve testing gits!

No wonder me ulcer’s started off again. Can I sue them do you think? No, then they would start doing their job properly if they had to defend themselves. Swines! They seem to be hanging out the sale of me house for some reason?

I put the TV into TV mode and watched some police programms… well, that was the plan. Fell asleep, doing an awful lot of this nowadays.

Woke early hours.

Must remember to increase me Warfarin tablets in the pots I’ve done up in advance tomorrow.

Hello, the stomach’s rumbling again.

Nodded off again…