INCHIE: Monday 20th March 2023

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More out of it than with it today,
Ideas and plans just fall away daily,
Logic, eye-sight, and hearing fade away.
Dementia Doreen, the brains stowaway…
Is with me every second of every day!
Even when I have a brain scan or x-ray…
Even my hopes are in disarray…
Several times today… and this sounds eerie…
I’ve not been me, but looking at me!
Occasionally this happens, & seems like cajolery,
This scenario holds traces of insanity?
I question my own humanity…
Struggling with the catheter and my cecity,
Losing track, thoughts and memory…
Now the mind-medics say ‘encephalopathy’,
I’ll look that up when this blog has gone away,
Is that owt to do with my Peripheral Neuropathy?
Encephalopathy? It doesn’t mean a thing to me!
Hehehe!

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Sorry, got a lot on today – up to the neck in it,
without the ability to get the jobs done.
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First Wee-Colour Check.

2nd check. Not sure how I got the colour to look silver? Hehe!

The ankles were looking a lot betterer!

The urine colour also looks betterer!

Georges (Asda) delivered the dressing gowns.

The darned valve leaked again on the

Care Kara called, as did Carers… erm… Sam? and… Kara, Jo… maybe Josef… I’m guessing here… What a mess I’m in.

No idea now what happened for many hours. After Asda on the notepad, something about massage evacuation? A tumble? Lost memory, Mind blanks, and Bladder  problems, leaking?
Not with it at all, here, mates.

Found the George throw on the Carers chair.

Late evening nosh.
Veg; potatoes, vegan cheese and butter,
Did some baked spuds to add.
Think I enjoyed it.

Maybe got my head down earlier than usual.

Woke up in as said above ‘Agony!’ with leg cramps! Trenches and dips in both legs, the right one far worse.
After ten-minutes or so they died down, and I realised that the pouch needed emptying…
Oh, Dearie me!  acci-whoop I lost balance bending down to take the wire off of the valve – the wee splashed over the bucket… mostly on me!
Struggled to the recliner to get back upright, and first thing was to get to the wet room, to strip off and wash myself. During which, I dropped the bottle of disinfectant, and it landed…
On , on the exact spot where the nail had dug itself in! No doubt about it – I was pissed off…
I knocked a selection of the medications off of the floor cabinet… the last olive oil bottle shattered as it hit the floor! At least it missed my feet and toes! I suppose!
Back into the main room, and got disinfecting the carpet, threw my cloths in the laundry bag. I continued cursing as I got back down into the c1966, £300 pound, second-hand charity-shop bought, crumb-containing, odour-retaining, Harold’s Haemorrhoid-testing, nauseatingly beige coloured, non-working, virus-breeding recliner. But could I get back to sleep? No!

I lay there full of self pity. A pathetic site, it must have been.
I’ve not felt this low for… well, ever before.

TTFN

INCHIE TODAY: Sunday 19th March 2023

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Inchies’ sorry for the bad grammar, spelling, and rhyming!
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What fantastic colouring to the sky this morning!

To the right, and the City Hospital.

Straight ahead.

Eerie?

Wider.

Odd slippers?
This was thanks to the valve on the catheter pouch going into self-determining mode – and pouring out the urine into my slipper yet again. Mor cleaning up and freshening are required. Humph!

The carer told me I was running out of medications again. Carer Josef said he’d inform the office. Weekend, of course, so nowt to be down now.

I forgot to remind him to take the waste bags and laundry bag with him.
I’ll try to remember on the next call.

Bootiful clouds were coming out when I made my next cup of Glengettie.
Going a smidge dark, though?

I forgot about asking the next Carer to take the laundry & waste bags with him. I am a prisoner of Dementia Doreen!

The new day catheter, with the ‘Dodgy’ loose valve trigger, at least had some better-coloured urine contents this time.

gave me one of his famously-hated routines just as I was opening a jar of soya pieces for later. Naturally, this didn’t irk or bother me in the slightest. No swearing, spitting, gnashing of what few teeth I have left, or questioning the Lord over my bad luck, oh, no. I took it all in my stride. even when I got a stubbed toe on the Hoover, cleaning the mess up. Grrr!

I either fell asleep for two hours at the computer… or I had a Mind-Blank (Most likely, ’cause work had been done on the Health Check listing that I can’t remember doing?)
It was obvious that there would be sunset photos to take tonight. So I did a few close-ups of the nearby dwelling.

And the car park on Chestnut Way outside.
Tow spaces are free! Blimey!

acci-whoopObviously, I had not recovered from the Mind-Blank.
I copied the latest Health Check results onto the whiteboard to use them later in the graphic… Then realised I’d erased the new figures from the board and not the old ones. This can happen to anyone; I understand that.
But why is it always me? Hahaha!
It may be Doreen’s Dementia? Another Mind-Blank? Or the agony I’m currently getting from Little Inchies , thanks to the chaffing from tube inserted in Little Inchy? What am I waffling about? Why?

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Last call from the Carer, and again I forgot to remind him about the laundry bag again!

There should have been a photograph here; of a marvellous vegan meal that I had. It was delicious! Ready-made potatoes and onion with sauce side. To which I added a can of the mixed vegetables and oven cooked potatoes lumps, done nice and crispy! I was so keen to get my teeth (although I have far left to use nowadays) into it that I forgot about snapping it.

Doing the washing up after dining, and the night view caught my attention…

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There are people out there; what are they doing?
Mayhap a little painting & decorating?
Naturally, there will be some burgling…
Or a family having a housewarming?
Is someone opening the latest Gas payment warning?
No doubt a few couples physically fluctuating?
The police, investigating and exhumating?
Gangs of yobboes, selling drugs & mugging?
Bloggers on Facebook, evulgating?
I’m just sitting here, recalling when I was dating…
Grizelda – she’s gone now; very frustrating!

Not that I could anything if she was here with the damned, rotten catheter tube stuck in me. Funny old world! Well, not funny!

TTFN

INCHIE TODAY: Saturday 18th March 2023

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The bladder seems to still have its infection,
So for me, this means a painful erection…
Fear not; my last one was during the 1962 election,
Today the Whoopsies, Accifauxpas… botheration!
A quagmire of questions and quandaries,
Most of them were beyond my comprehension,
Carer Jo-Anne helped me with her suggestion…
To solve the problem of leaking Catheterisation!
We used bag-sealing wires for the prevention…
The pee filled my slipper on more than one occasion!
The loose valve was causing non-stop urination…
We tried another pouch; it was a duplication…
We found time and spirit for shared cachinnation…
At first unaware of urine escaping…
I went into the kitchen, with the wee-wee dripping…
Slipped on the wetness, tumbled, causing a contusion…
Jo-Anne arrived to see my confusion,

She asked me, “Whatever are you doing?”
She soon found there was a temporary solution.

Course it fell off when she’d gone, more pollution!
Did the carpet with an air spray & Dettol solution,
Moped the kitchen floor, forever cleaning!
Then got a letter from the Medical institution!

From the Consultant Surgeon, Urological…
Seems I may need a permanent catheter to widdle,
The best option would be a bladder reconstruction (Neobladder).
But not for me; too old & I’ve had bladder cancer,
Being on Warfarin makes the op too big a chancer,
So, for me, it’ll be a permanent Catheter,
Looked it up on the web; the result was not at all festal!
Messy, a hole in my stomach for the tube…expediential…
If I had to choose, I’ll be in a fuddle…
Not much gets me feeling frantical…
The options put me ferhoodled…
Dementia Doreen means I’m not really docible,
Making decisions, I’m not notable…
Still, my concerns are only ephemeral…
I’ll let others decide; someone reputable,
I’ll just be culpable and covenantal.

QUICK RECORD OF THE DAY
Moped up the escaped from the Catheter Pouch Wee-wee, used the speed-mop twice, and a lot of Dettol!

The fifteenth dollops of kitchen towels used on where the urine had trickled for an hour, without my realising it. Tut!

The waste bags with the slippers, socks and used kitchen towels well wrapped up and sealed, awaiting removal.

Much better colour in the next emptying of the pouch.
Possible something to do with it having been left running for an hour or so?

Bootiful lunchtime clouds!

Car park below from the kitchenette.
With a now clean unsmelly floor!

Afternoon views
Pareidoliaing clouds.

Nearest they came to sunset photos…
Pareidoliaing again…
Pareidoliaing, a shark or whale in the depths?

Pareidoliaing: Eyes, nose & mouth of what, though?
Pareidoliaing? Erm…
A not-red Red Dwarf view? Hehe!
The Sun’s last effort to burst through again
Toodle-pips!

A terrible photo of the simple meal.
Tomatoes with basil, sea salt & oregano.
Some (Many) vegan mini sausages…
A coup[le of bread rolls to help soak it up.
In the morning, after eating this load of nosh,
I woke to find about five empty crisp packets in the bin!
Guilt, shame and mystery as to how I did this and not remember?

Wishing You All Veritable Fortunes!

INCHIE TODAY: Thursday 16th 2023

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Well, what a brilliant con artist she is!
It’s worth reading this to see what & how she did it.
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Do you know… are you listening?
There were times today; I’m not kidding…
When I almost knew what I was doing!
Twelve goes at the Catheter irrigating,

There must be summat else, it’s irritating…
So much I keep on forgetting,
Doreen Dementia’s
inquinating…
My memory, she’s masticating…
The Doctor’s ready for cognoscing,

My concentration is cadencing,
I await good luck commencing,

My brain is beyond assubjugating.
I suppose all this should be heartbreaking?
But a chance of some little ameliorating…
I’ve got cheesy potatoes in the oven baking!

I can smell the cheese as it’s melting…
I bet this is going to taste belting!

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20:15hrs now. Another day flashes by.
What I’ve done and why.
Who’s been to see me?
Can’t remember, can’t decree…
Been a sad muddled day for me!
So, some photos you can see,
Feeling so confused, I could cry!

First Pouch emptying…

Before the mist descended.

Food order. Some treats for the Carers.

One of the afternoon pouch emptying.
Amazing colour, healthy looking!

Nice parking today!

Mug of Glengettie, note-less notepad,  and a nose bleed.

Blimus! This one filled up quickly.

Late Carer Josef called. Only needed some painkillers to ease the mild agony from the Catheter bag tube in Little Inchy. Argh!

NOSH TIME

The plan was to show a photo of the served-up nosh here.
However: The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry!
No matter how carefully a project is planned, something may still go wrong with it. The saying is adapted from a line in “To a Mouse” by Robert Burns: “The best-laid schemes o’ mice an’ men / Gang aft a-gley.”

Yes, Inchie forgot to put the SD card back in the camera again!
So the evening shot and shot of the TV on, also, 
as Rabbi Burns said… “Gang aft a-gley “.

When I emptied night pouch,
I did remember to put the car in first. Tsk!

Not a good colour.

When I was nodding off, I needed to utilise the.
again. The visit took me half an hour
or so overall. Sticky, gooey, messy. The actual
evacuation maybe lasted a minute.
The cleaning up & medicating… ages!
Costly business nowadays. Last year the above cost me
£2.19 – Now… £4.99! But it does a good job of easing .

On that rather sordid note, I’ll leave you now. (Fri Morning)
And get this blog checked. (I’m bound to miss some mistakes, of course, I’m getting good at that recently) and sent off to WordPress.

TTFN Each!

INCHIE TODAY: Wednesday 15th March 2023

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I woke after what I believed was a six-hour dream, and the memory of the ‘Gone-Missing-Laundry’ came to mind; as I was getting depressed and morbid at the prospects of having no dressing gowns, spending a fortune to replace them and the throws that may turn up, or likely will never will, and the email from the bank asking for confirmation and why I have bought the same things that I~~ did three months ago…

Then the real worry came to me. Wearing trousers for the Brain Scan at the hospital which is going to produce at least agony to poor Little Inchy as the catheter tube pulls and tugs again his fungal lesion. Next, the thought of having no dressing gown to change into and get out of the pain-giving trews when I get home to relieve the pain hit me… Argh!

A Mild Depression Dawned!
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When I forced my tormented body and mind to rise from the depths of the second-hand, £300, charity shop bought, crumb-retaining, microorganism-microbe producing, gungy, moth-eaten, beige-coloured, non-working, bacillus encouraging, incommodious, Haemorrhoid Harold testing, c1968 recliner, I found that the Catheter punch contents were…


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At the highest level of colouration on the chart.
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I think there may be a slight chance, remote possibility, hundred-to-one shot, that today may not be a good one. Then again, when was my last good day?
was not too hopeful of finding my ‘taken-away-to-be-laundered clothing’. The chances, must be slim, but she did say she’d have another look around for me.

Found my laundry.
But no throws in there.

Morning:
CorelDraw not letting me add any photos.
Trouble getting into WP.
Mousee taking me left & right, not up and down?
Fearing the worse here…

INCHIE TODAY: Tuesday 14th March 2023

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The laundry, containing three nightgowns, I have another that I’m wearing at the moment that is getting a smidgeon whiffy, appears to have been lost or returned to the wrong client. I’m scared to send any more stuff to the laundry. The value of these dressing gowns is infinitesimal… no, sorry, I meant inestimable; Purely for the pain relief they give me from wearing trousers with the tube inserted into Little Inchie, thus causing agony, and .
So, when indoors, I do not wear trousers at all, just one of the now sadly gone missing at the laundry dressing gowns.
Tomorrow, I must get the trews on again to go to the QMC for the first brain scan. Lift arriving at 12:30hrs – lift home at 15:30hrs. Easy-Link confirmed this on a telephone call today. Bless them. The thought of having no dressing gown to wear when I return is galling. I dare not go around with just a gown on when someone other than Carers is due.
I can almost feel the pain from trouser-wearing already. Argh!

There may not be a blog tomorrow – I’ll see how things go, time-wise.

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With no larger night bags available – I came close to having an explosion of urine showering this morning. Talk about overfull!

The ankles were a smidge swollen, and the ankle ulcers were more prominent than they usually are. No pains, though.

After a pot of porridge, onto the computer.

Two photos of rare morning glimpses of the sun.
Not good ones, mind.

An absolute pleasure doing some pareidoliaing
Especially with these cloud-creatures in view.

In the afternoon, the sky became almost of an
oh, so pretty Sepia colouring.

Bootiful!

At last, the urine had cleared on the third emptying.
But, on the seventh one… Oh, dearie me!

Silly me got these out of order. These
ones are from the waking half-hour when.
I wandered around the rooms in the dark
taking pictures. Why? No idea!
But here they are…

Tatters in the slow cooker.

Suddenly not feeling very well.
I’ll pack up now, don’t want to be
unprepared for the Brain scan tomorrow.

AMAZING (To me) SUNSET SHOTS
Early in the evening, ghost-clouds, Awesome.
Back to the brown beauties!.
Gone from view sun, the sky goes back to blue?
Nightie-night!
What a series of changes in colour. Never seen this before.

came again. No signs of the laundry being found. This could be costly; three dressing gowns, a bath towel, woolly hats, the Carers’ chair throw, and likely more stuff that went into the bag and will have to be replaced. That is if I don’t mysteriously find the bag hidden somewhere… and if they cannot be located, of course. There is always a chance they may come across them. I kept thinking maybe there were not taken and searching the room… repeatedly; but I never found the bag.
I’ve had to order some more dressing gowns, but can’t get them delivered before next week, cost me well over £100 quid.
Not much goes right for me… You might have noticed? Huh!

No meal tonight as such. Had a pot noodle, made and added some gravy, and dunked a bread roll in it. Nice!

Got my head down. Nodded off pretty quickly, and it felt as if I had a dream that went on all night. I didn’t wake up once! But the dream, that was of my journeying on a bus somewhere, and it kept getting lost… things seem to be in the 1950s, a conductress in the Bristol Lodekka bus.

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It went on and on…

Ah, Well, Evening all!

INCHIE TODAY: Sunday 12th March 2023

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It’s genuinely difficult to write this little overview,
And wanted to write it in rhyme, too!
I’m not going to start moaning… I’ll try not to…
Naturally, I can’t promise you,
My brain used to act as an autocue…
Now, Wednesday, I’ve another brain scan due,
Dementia Doreen has me as a detenue & détenu,
It’s difficultest to maintain logic & virtue,
There is no point now in taking any long view…
It’s a battle to wash, dress, and take a poor!
Whatever can I do?
I try to stay witty and not feel blue…
Price rises in rent, electricity, & food accrue,
Bad enough, but now the mind does miscue,
The eyes give me misty, mottled view…
The catheter pain, pouch replacement is overdue…
Without help, I can’t get on a sock or shoe!
Taking too many tumbles. walk into doors too!
Deafness worsening will continue…
But I’ll not give in, I promise you!
When I see St Peter and his gate crew…
There’s going to be a right hullabaloo!

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Sorry not have much on today; time beat me again…

This is the punch, one hour after emptying it. Not a lot?

Gloomy morning.

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Potatoes were put in the slow cooker and forgotten about again.
I can use them on Monday?

Email from Manor Laboratories in the USA. The Time-Machine Professor Billum and HRH Lisa-Petal, are going to ring me again: Bless them!
Being a logical Scientist, Billum asked which time would be bestest to make the call. I checked on next week’s calendar and sent a copy to the Manor. It was early Morning when I found this, hope  I got it right.

Yikes! This ain’t good.

Not so good view photos tonight.
Still, I’ve done worserer ones. Tsk!

The ‘In’s & Out’s of it’ continued today.
I think I had many more than yesterday.
Which resulted in dozens of mini-mind-blanks.
As for  recalling what I was doing… well?

Gotten Himmel!
I think it looked worse than what it was. The light shining on the masculine, jealous-making to others, postmarked scarred, blotchy right leg makes the blood in the bag seem darker than it really is. No? .
 The pouch seemed ready to explode as well.

The vegetarian casserole went down well. I’d seasoned t with some Henderson’s sauce, sea salt, 7-Mediterranean vegetables sauce, and tomato passata with basil, and a vegetable Oxo cube. Oh, yes, and a sprinkling of some imitation soya-bacon crumbles.
I gave this a Taste Rating of 7.4/10. Not bad at all.

Sweet Morpheus was not keen on helping me again, and I ended up putting the TV on, that usually guarantees me nodding off. Well, it did this time… But unfortunately, it took a couple of hours longer than usual

Evening, all!
Well, Morning all then. Hehe!

INCHIE TODAY: Saturday 11th March 2023

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Heck of a shock here today! The NHS input site advised me to ring NHS 111 starlight away, So I did!
But they were too busy and told me to visit the NHS 111 site. So, I did.
An hour later, I filled in the questions asked & guessed at the choices made.
Sent it off and was told someone would contact me later. They are very busy, and this may take some time, be patient. So, I did!
I went to make a brew, and the telephone rang – I was surprised I heard it in the kitchen, but, there you are, I did.
Answered many questions and had to guess at a few. The nurse had an accent, and the kine was not good, so it took a time to review all the needed details. Ultimately, she decided that the SYSs 128, and 119, with respective DIAs 57 and 59, were okay? This despite the NHS monitoring site telling me it was Too Low and to ring 111?
Don’t feel too confident about this. But then again, it’s unsurprising; they are the lowest readings I’ve ever had?

Well, the lowest B~P readings ever, advised to ring 111 – told to go online, spent ages sorting required details. Told it was okay. And earlier, this above when I woketh up. Similar farces these two. If the blood in the wee is level 6 or 7, I’m supposed to ring 111 – Ha!

I was woken up (Didn’t get settled until around 04:00hrs) and was woken by the arrival of Carer Sam. I was half out of it, having just been stirred reluctantly back to life. Think we had a chinwag, and Sam took the washing nada waste bag on her way out. Thank you.

Porcelain Throne visited, cleaned up the kitchen, dropped the milk bottle, and stubbed my toes again. The brain was not too interested in being creative and went on strike a few times when I got nothing done whatsoever; just seemed to sit here thinking but not knowing why or what of?

The yes were still bad, and concentration as well.
Dizzy Dennis, The Kathleen Catheter tube, and Anne Gyna all gave me bother of some sort. I really was only half here for many hours. Scary!  Sort of light-headed, I suppose… mind you, I still am now seven hours later.

Lost the camera but found it a few hours later, hidden in front of me to the right of the computer – How the hell did I miss that?

Liberty-Global Virgin Media went down.
I made a brew and fell asleep for a while…
A while? Four bloody hours!

Carer Jo-Anne arrived; I was still a bit vague about things.
After the gal left… Ah, it was Jo-Anne I think that tool the washing? I could be wrong; of course, it has been known.

No sunset tonight. Boo!

Found the camera.
Lost the eye drops.
Sadly no chance of any sunset tonight… Sob!

Took early evening shots.