Inchcock: Saturday 8th October 2022

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POLITICAL CARTOON
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05:00hrs: I stirred into ersatz life, belched, and the need for the Porcelain Throne was detected. So, out of the £300, second-hand, c1968, charity shop-bought, eyesorely-horrendously grungy coloured, Harold Haemorrhoid-testing, easily-falloutable from, unfit-for-use, not working, recliner, and hobbled to the wet room. Where GC hatthe was immediately utilised.
I felt the need to rush a bit to get seated… but was wrong! Things didn’t, and wouldn’t move for ages! The crossword puzzle was tried… then counting the cracks on the ceiling (48 today). Used the spyglass to read some of the labels on the medications and cleaners. And still, no movement! I went back to the crossword book, but my concentration was not good, and I didn’t get a single new solution; but, I found a spelling mistake.
Finally, after a marathon wait, things started progressing. Grindingly slowly, and painfully! were stinging, but not a drop of blood was found during the cleanup! Which cheered me up a smidgeon! I got nervous about what I did earlier in the kitchen, and the routine took over.

I went to check on the taps, heaters etc. and found nothing untoward. I did spot the morning view, though.
A got the Lumix out and took a few photographs of the scene on view.
The first (top) one was spoilt by my and the following shakes and trembles.

However, the next two came out shudder-free, despite a short visit from for a moment. She often follows the neurotransmitter’s performance.

I made a mug of Thompson’s Punjana tea, left it to brew, and had to nip back to the wet room for another wee-wee. I had such a massive leak after the main attraction that by the time I’d got cleaned and back to the brew, it had gone stone cold! I ditched the tea, washed the cup, and got a bottle of spring water instead.

Despite the much lower SYS at 146, the assessment chart still put me in a higher in the red-zone area?

Sam arrived. Had a little chinwag.

I went back to blogging.

Well, that was a nice break from , I’ve not heard a bang, clout or thud for over an hour… he’s back now, though.

I got myself in the right pickle again, with grammar errors, formatting cock-ups.. and with the accompaniment of bashing away at me. Grrr!

The regular Iceland Man arriveth! He popped the bags into the kitchenette for me; bless him. I insisted he take a thank you; he chose a can of Fanta orange. I soon started emptying the four bags. The small bananas were large ones. The three Bread thins were two and substituted with one of the two for a pound, cobs, but I got charged full price for not buying two, which I didn’t ask for in the first place. The flipping Iceland fiddle me every time! They were short of one oven bake long-life cobs, so I lost the offer price on those as well!

All of Richard’s stuff was correct, Tsk! Jealousy! He got all of his meat burgers! Still, he’s a good lad. I had to buy the imitation lamb burgers again. They still have no No-Bull brand burgers sack in stock. It doesn’t bother me, though; Oh! No! I’m not jealous!?  I got everything stored away. They made one slip-up, mind you. They had both jars of Passata sauce with herbs that were on offer if you bought two. Hehehe! I got the oven warming up for later to cook the seasoned with peppers chips later. Then, back to the computer… But!

I find that the distinguished-looking number-cruncher, smoke & mirrors operator, Con-man, who just has no idea how to get an Internet Service working anything-like reliably, and he still gets his $23.6 million salary, plus bonuses, shares in the company and expense account; Is so easy to hate!

Must concentrate on cooking now. Oh, I’ll just check to see if Amazon is still delivering today on the tracker. I’d estimate the ETA as about three or four hours. Amazon says by 21:00hrs now, not 22:30hrs. We’ll see!

Lumix back working… it beats me, but cheered me up. Took this shot of the evening view.

Made the meal, and a tasty looking one it was, too. But… looks can be deceiving. As was the case with this beautiful-looking plate of crap!
These chips were inedible! Co-op Salt & Pepper ready side meal. Unless you can cope with viciously flavoured capsicums and white pepper soaked into your chips, I’d give these a wide birth if I was you. Foul is the word I was looking for to describe these. Putrid and troat-burning, too!
I put this photo on the left of the cruel, tongue-burning aforementioned lethal suicide-inducing chips; As a Warning to anyone thinking of trying them.
Only diehard Pepperholics can cope with the red-hot taste of these.
The veg-pasties and tomatoes were alright, though. Bearing in mind that these are all I ate from the plate… Well, I did eat two chips… well, put them in my mouth and spat them out. The first one, , and it was so bad, I tried another, thinking I may have swallowed a dead dung beetle, and couldn’t believe how foul the first one tasted. Overall, a taste rating of 2.2/10. That was for the tomatoes and pastie.
I looked up why people are addicted to Chillies and got this: Chilli Peppers contain capsaicin, a natural chemical that sends a burning sensation from the nerve endings in the mouth to the brain. The body defends itself against this pain sensation by secreting endorphins, natural painkillers that cause a physical “rush” – a high that keeps us craving for more. It’s claimed to be a far better uplifter than the effects of cannabis & CBD, according to the ASM (American Monthly Scientist) magazine. Not for me; a can of chilli-con-carne I can just about cope with, but never again on chips! Indigestible, nasty unpalatable, unpleasant and horrible! I imagine my Cyber-Mate, Tim, would have devoured these with glee. He is a definite Pepperholic!

I got the unwanted meal into three bags and those into a black bag, sealed it up, and limped down to the waste chute and deposited it.
I did want it to burst open and get the caretakers high with the aroma or spill on them and burn through their overalls onto their flesh. Hehehe!

I tried again to go onto WordPress Reader, but it would not let me in again?

Sleep was again resistant to my pleas.

Diary Thursday 15th September 2022

TODAY’s POLITICAL CARTOON
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I didn’t get to sleep until around 03:00hrs. Hence, I was late getting up, well after 07:00hrs. As I pulled the quilt to reveal my legs, I’d got one leg deathly white and the other almost orange? The toes on both feet were looking bloodless!
By the time I’d had a wash and shave, Richard was coming in the door. His health looked poor, and he was coughing well in between the yawns. The poor lad! At least he had a few days off after visiting me, his last call. I got him a bottle of lime-flavoured tonic water; I thought the lemon might help with his throat a little. We had a decent natter, although he wanted to get home to bed. I gave Richard the stuff I’d had in the freezer for him for a few days but kept forgetting about it. Tsk!
I hope he can get some sleep. Druggies, yobboes and the water companies’ works are still outside of his home. I mentioned the carers not pressing the door chime when they come, as the two who came last night didn’t. Wished him well as he left.

Minutes later, I got a text from Iceland. Substitutes again. I checked the Email.

A sorry company nowadays Iceland are. Mind you, the others are not much better. At least the payment for short goods is made automatically with Iceland. J Sainsburys send you a code to use and a limited time span on it when making the next order. Of course, I forget to. CRAP!

Were carried out. Not a good one again.
As you can here on the right.
Having said that, there are some much worse ones earlier. The pulse was high, and the Chinese body temperature was a little lower again.


Another decent evacuation, I have to say. So I said it. Hehehe!

The Iceland man delivered goods. leaving them conveniently blocking the doorway. Good job; we didn’t have a fire alarm.

I struggled with the carriers through to the kitchenette and a start on sorting and storing them.
I’d only bought three frozen items, and I’m not sure that I meant to get the big bag of chips?
Thank heavens, I remembered Richard’s stuff in the freezer this morning. Else there would never have been room in there to get these three in. Tsk!
I bought some extra strong cheddar to have with vegetable shepherd’s pie… but being a dimwit of the highest order, I forgot to order the shepherd’s pies!
. The short-dated replacement for the veggie burger had a ‘Free Short Dated’ sticker on it… which covered the ‘ Use By date!  Good old Iceland!
At least they had some bread in stock today, well, cobs, not the ones I wanted, but still. I got the delivery sorted and all put away… where might be a mystery later.

Started on the blog and stayed at it for a good few hours… it was an embarrassing slow, error-filled job. Much worse than of late.

The landline flashed. It was a lady from Link transport. Confirming tomorrow’s lift to the diabetes course. I checked it with the calendar.
Minutes later, the Doctors surgery rang about my appointment with the nurse on the 26th. The surgery is closing that day for the Queen’s funeral. I bet the Queen never had to wait eight weeks to see her Doctor; now it will be ten weeks!

I found this photo on the SD card when loaded the others up. It seems that I had another meal last night or this morning? I was losing my grip on things here.
Within minutes I had to stop everything to take a rest and get something to eat.
I think the mind-blanks had taken another go at me.
I really believed it was about midday. Checked on the computer, and guess what time it was? 17:10hrs!

Won’t be long until the carers walk in without ringing the buzzer. I’ll stop now and get some nosh of some sort for tonight made. Where did the day go?

Arrived, it was Riya; I knew her name as soon as she answered my question; “Erm, what’s your name?”. Hahaha! Riya pressed the door chime as well before coming in; bless her. I wonder if Richard mentioned anything in their office? She got me sorted in record time, and Riya asked if there was anything else. I said no, and told her to select a nibble and drinkie in thanks. By gum, she moves quick. I only just got to ask her to take the waste bag with her as she was closing the door.

I made up a meal, using the special offer 50%-extra free crinkle cut, McCains microwave chips. Some of the Jenny-supplied tomatoes and veggie burgers and sausages. I ate the burgers and sausages wrapped in a cob. Apart from the pathetic paper-tasting chips, all went down well. Taste: 6.5/10.

I managed to stay awake to watch a ‘Heartbeat’ episode, and I drifted off into the bliss of sleep.

What happened after that is a mystery, but evidently, I got up amd moved some clothes around?

Tue/Wed 30-31st August 2022: Diary

Starting with a Funny that tickled me!
It just tickled me!
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03:30hrs: Wee-wee searched for reading glasses. Struggled to get some WP comments answered.
Trotsky is in charge again, all over in seconds, but not so messy.
A few little cuts shaving, one half-hearted toe stubbing. Sorted bags. And onto the computer to update yesterday’s blog. Picture of meal missing? then…

Lost without the internet,,, So pottered about in the kitchen, sorting the cupboards out… well, moving stuff about, I wanted to check use-by dates, of course, I couldn’t read them thanks to the internet still off, so…

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I went to get the Boots sphygmomanometer and found the reading glasses… I could so easily have broken them. I kicked them along the carpet. I must have dropped them off during the night from the recliner. Tsk!
Ah, well, all well with them.
The blood pressure was in the red, but only the lower reds,
SYS 150, DIA 79, Pulse 70 0r 78, I can’t make the number out, Humph! Cataract Cathy!
Body temperature was 33.5°f, okay.

Then I tried the computer again,
I spent hours getting nowhere; well, I did get somewhere – in a muddle!
  I feared he was going to fall asleep, the poor thing was musical yawning, and I wonder how his teeth didn’t fall out… oh, no, he doesn’t wear them at work, I’ve forgotten why. Hehe!
I seem to have scribbled on the notepad; ‘Snabbled our BG?’ I bet my cyber mate, Billum, could work out what it was I meant to write. Hang on, I’ll take a photo of it, so he can peruse it for me; if he doesn’t mind, sorry to keep you waiting.
I’m back.
I tried the internet again, thanks to Mr Fries, it was on again! For about ten minutes, then:

The Morrison food farce arrived.
Leaking bangs where the ice pack had broken, ready bruised bananas again!
And the bloke wasn’t too keen on bringing them up to the flat.
Service seems to be a thing of the past nowadays.
He did bring them up eventually,
Got the things away and back on the computer quick before it goes off again. Fries the shady one full of smoke, contempt and lies!
Certainly earning his money is Liberty-Global, Virgin Media money-man Fries. His smoke and mirrors, thaumaturgy, and number-crunching in other parts of Liberty-Global must surely be paying his wages. For he is sadly lacking in knowing anything about customer satisfaction or how to run an internet providing service… service? Hah!

I got some progress done on the Snippets blog and had to stop and sit down… well, make a meal first, of course.
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Got into the right state of affairs, getting the meal sorted out and served up. ① Spilt a load of raw pod peas on the floor! ② Burnt a finger getting the cheese pastie from the oven.③ Not only dropped a sliced cob on the floor,④ I trod on it as well! Just to round things off, ⑤ Forgot to take a knife & fork with me and had to return to get them from the kitchen. Naturally, in a bit of haste, I cut myself on the knife, grabbing it quickly from the holder. Some good came of the travesties, though; The meal was great, even if not as hot as I would have liked. Hahaha! Taste Rating: 8.3/10.
Plus, the joy of falling asleep!

I must have had a decent kip cause the next thing I remember was two carers in the room pottering around. A none buzzer-presser. That Or I didn’t hear it or, of course. Sam and Joanne, I think it was. Tablet issued. We did have a little natter, but what about is beyond me. Treats were chosen, and I went to the door with them to lock it.
Back to the front room, thinking I’d better make a brew, then get some computing done on the blog.
But No!,
I did get some p[hotographicalisationg done from the kitchenette window.
The beauty of the sun setting, I could not resist taking,
The first one to my right,
The second one is straight ahead,
and the third slightly to the right.
Bootiful.
Then got the pots washed up and had a wee-wee; not have many of those today; what a nice change. Then I stubbed my toe, not a bad one!
A gorgeous night out there.
My plan for getting caught up on the blogging was abandoned – in favour of getting back to sleep,
Which I did rapidly, back into another dream-filled kip for two hours or so. Then needing another wee-wee, then feeling guilty for not doing the blog, it was back in the recliner again for even more time with Sweet Morpheus. So annoying that I could not recall what the dreams entailed.

Starting with possibly the worst ever…
Ode wot I’ve ever wrote!

Sorry!

Now Today’s Funny Cartoon

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I got up in the morning in need of painkillers and a wee-wee, Both of which were taken.

Coming out of the wet room after Cleaning the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket), the most fantastic view coming through the kitchenette window almost took my breath away. How the sun or moon was getting through at this time of day remains a mystery. (although I had no idea what time it was, Hehe) I had a few minutes of pareidolia pleasure. Back in the £300 second-hand, c1968, charity shop-bought, eyesorely-horrendously grungy coloured, Harold Haemorrhoid-testing, easily-falloutable from, unfit-for-use, not working, recliner.

But, Sweet Morpheus was not interested. After a few curse words, I again rose from the depth of the dusty chair and immediately got on with updating this blog… well, no, starting this blog template! After a few hours of failures, mistakes and getting all worked up and agitated, followed by Anne Gyna kicked off, and she had not stopped all day. Even now, 20 hrs later, she’s still at it, and I’ve used all the Peptac medicine! Again. Then, the worst thing that could have given me more grief happened…


Right pee’d off, Which didn’t help Anne Gyna a bit! The Peripheral Neuropathy ailments were on and off all day as well. The little fingers… Oh, I don’t think I’ve mentioned it yet. Now the left little digit has joined the right one in trying to wrap themselves around the other fingers. No pain with it! But try typing when the bambino’s fingers are sticking out or in all the time. It takes me so long to get anything done; the eyes are getting worse. And try picking your nose with wayward do-as-they-like digits… I got one stuck up my nose earlier, and then one nearly poked myself in the eye! Cooking and making tea can be a challenge, but the most annoying is the computer keyboard. With the Nicodemus’ Neurotransmitters going offline at any time, one cannot feel a sense of touch when they do. So no doubt the CorelDraw problems could be due to this? It got much worse late when joined in the attack! Moan over!

I gave up on the computer, and the were tackled. The Boots Sphygmomanometer, which was manufactured by, ZDEAC (Zhongshan Daguan Electrical Appliance Company Ltd) in Guangdong, China, was utilised.
SYS 150, DIA 67, Pulse 67, and temperature at 33.4°f. Which I thought was pretty fair.
But the NHS site I put the figures in, still had me in the red zone again. Still, it was only just in it. I was more concerned with getting the blog done than with these results. As soon as the BP was done, I got onto the computer and rebooted it. Guess what? Fries strikes yet again!

You know, how some people really get to you? It used to be Tony Blair with me years ago… but not now. Now it’s Mr Fires of Liberty-Global, who convinced his bosses to pay $15 billion to buy out Virgin Media from Mr Branson. There have been glitches and or internet cut-outs every single week since, for years. How does the man keep his job?
I suppose his knowledge of what the smoke and mirrors, money-manipulating Liberty-Global have been up to with all their financial figure-shuffling and chicanery is stopping them from getting rid of him? I read in the financial press that apart f
rom the £24m salary, he gets shares in the company and an expense account. Of course, it doesn’t bother me in the least.

Carer (Yawner) Richard arrived. We had a quick natter after he’d done the medications. I forgot to tell him I was short om the Peptac medicine, Humph! The lad is so tired of a morning, and this morning he had to shoot off early: he’d got another call added on again. Bless him, a nice lad.
I forgot to mention, earlier, the sky had changed dramatically, and while pottering about, I took these rather astounding photos, well, no. The view I took the photographs of was the astounding thing about it.
I can’t remember when I took them no.

The intercom went off while I was in the kitchen, so I heard it. Went to investigate, and it was an Amazon delivery man. When he asked if I was coming down to collect it, his tone of voice and attitude left me in no doubt he was never going to bring it up! Git!
So, I had to get the slippers on, a time-consuming job in my condition and went to the door to go down. And Carol was approaching the door with the package. Now that was really kind of her. ♥

At last, Liberty-Global, Virgin Media, Fries, internet came back on. I’d been doing some word collation while I was waiting,

The landline flashed into life it was Jillie Cartwright; bless her. We had a natter, but I could not hear everything the gal said. I think, nae, hope, she’s popping in to see me tomorrow. ♥

I spent the next six hours on this blog and was shattered. All the usual time-costing cock-ups! And by 02:00hrs in the morning, I am still working on it! But had to give up when the evening carers called. The gals did me, selected their treats, and I got on with doing more of this blog… for another four hours!

Had to stop around 05:00hrs, try to get this done and posted and get something to eat before the Carer called.

The photos I took of the sunset tonight, I’ll try to get them in tomorrow’s blog. But it’s the diabetes meeting, and I have to… Oh, you fool Inchcock – it’s Thursday now, not Friday! Oh, dear!

TTFNski

Inchcock Today: Fri 29th July 2022

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Having woken up with the carer hovering over me, lovely gal, I could not get back to sleep afterwards. Clumpnangles! So I got the Thursday blog finished and posted off. Now it is about 01:45hrs, and I’ve got an Iceland order coming in the morning… Will I wake up to hear the intercom? No chance of hearing it if I’m asleep… Oh, dear… Ah well, better try to get the head down again! No, not yet… I’ll get the Blood Pressure done now; save time in the morning! Does that make sense? I booted up the Boot’s Sphygmomanometer, manufactured by ZDEAC (Zhongshan Daguan Electrical Appliance Company Ltd) in Guangdong, China. SIA 150, DIA 63 and the Pulse at an agreeable 80.
Then the body temperature was taken with the contactless machine. Oh yes, another good figure recorded. I put the figures on the NHS DVT site.
Botherations!
or Cataract Cathy, maybe both of them, made me put in the wrong figure for the pulse, 60 instead of 80. And now it’s gone to the monitoring station. I’m gonna look fool again! Mind you that comes easy to me, being a fool. I’ll ring them later in the morning, maybe send an email pointing out my cock-up. Worded differently, though. Tsk! 

♫ Oh, Susana ♫ chimed out, and I realised I had not unlocked the door, so made my way, rather easily actually, barely hobbling to the door and opening it… noticed that I had not got any trousers on! I hid behind the door and told Carer Valerie of my predicament. Grabbed a towel from the airer to cover my privates (although a postage stamp would have sufficed) and went into the junk room to get some trousers on. I think I heard Valerie saying, “That’s alright, don’t worry, I’ll wait here…” 
Fumbling to get the trews on as quickly as possible; resulted in a stubbed toe and bruised shoulder. Tsk! Valerie got the medications sorted out,  and gave me a minute or two chinwagging, Bless her. She didn’t fancy a nibble or drink this morning. Thanked her and apologised for the lack of clothing, and started to explain about it and she was sympathetic I think, telling me again ‘Not to worry’♥

Back on the computer getting the blog start prepped for an hour or so, and out burst ♫ Oh, Susana ♫. It was the Iceland delivery. When I got the door open, the bags had been left handily for me to gag them in. Fair do’s to the lad, when he saw my stick and me limping, (stubbed toe the cause) he asked it I wanted him o put them through the door for me. But the lad had kept the good all neat, and I could see nothing crushed or any leaks, and he arrived on time and thought I’d best not delay him after he’s made the effort, so I replied, “No thanks, I can get them in one at a time, cheers!”
I regretted saying that afterwards. Hehehe! I banged my shoulder again, starting off Shuddering Shoulder Shirley this time as I got the bags into the kitchenette and the beer into the junk room. With the massive increases in the cost of the G&T’s etc., I thought I’d tempt them with the Heineken lager instead.
Iceland sent all the bread ordered today. Silly me was sure there were going to be unavailable, as there normally is… But no, not today. So I had a heck of a job, reshuffling the freezer contents to make room to get all the cobs and bread in it. At least I won’t run out of bread for a while. Haha!
I’d only got two frozen items ordered. One pot of my favourite No-Moo ice cream and some No-Meat mushroom steaks to try. They were not cheap. I had to take them out of the box to get them into the fridge, and that the box they came in; could have been half the size it was, and there would still have been room in it for the miniature-sized diddly mushroom steaks. I just hope that they are tasty enough to be worth it!
Getting the fresh stuff in the fridge was even more difficult to achieve. As you can see on the right here, there was not a lot of spare room left spare!

I did manage to put a couple of the bottles in there in case the Carer of the day or evening fancies a cold lager.

I assembled all the rubbish and mess that I’d made during the food delivery and the sorting it out.

As I got out of the door into the three flats foyer, the noise from nowhere and everywhere was going off. It sounded the same as it the other day, and confusing it was! To me, it sounded like a machine running, like s giant sewing machine. To Josie, it sounded like a drilling noise. And if both Josie and I can hear it, it must be loud. Neighbour Malcolm gave a different thought; he said it was like rushing water.
I got to the. I got into the lift lobby to go to the waste chute room at the far end, and I swear it was louder than ever.
All a part and parcel of the mysteries of Winwood Heights, the ghosts, wraiths, spectres, cacodemons, apparitions and other grotesqueries that haunt the hallways and lobbies, searching for Inchcock, to create ambiguities, abstrucities, perplexities, misfortunes and botherations, to scare. worry and confuse me!
I got back in the flat and had a wee-wee; I’ve not mentioned them yet, but they were regular if short ones.

I had a wash, and I checked out the ankle and legs. Apart from a little bloating on the right foot, they were so much better than yesterday. Which made a nice change.

On the computer, I made a start on the Local News Snippet blog, then started this one going. Again, the time has vanished; it’s 13:00hrs already? I thought I ought to get on the WordPress Reader to catch up on others’ blogs posted. So, I did!

He’s of again, bang, thud, clang. Tap-tapping. I wouldn’t be the same living here if wasn’t up there above me, with his mechanical operas keeping me company.
Got the new spuds in the saucepan. Then quartered some large mushrooms, seasoned them and got them going in the crock pot. I seemed to be doing well and considered going into a Smug-Mode.

Buy, my EQ warned me against doing so, so I didn’t. Seconds later, I found out why…

Getting the tomatoes out of the fridge, and at just the wrong moment, Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley ensured the tomatoes ended up on the floor. As I moved to try to catch some, I trod on one! so…

I only went down on one knee this time, but it was Cartilage Kathy’s right one, and ever since, she’s been showing her displeasure at my actions, in the form of stinging a fair bit when I move, stand up, or bend the knee. Hey-Ho! I rubbed in a load of Phorpain Gel.

Got down in the c1962 recliner, and I kept a keen eye on the timing for the fodder cooking. Most importantly… and the difficult bit in staying awake! But I managed it and was soon getting the nosh served up and cleaning the mess I’d made. It’s becoming a habit lately, making messes and having Accifauxpas when cooking?)
The meal on the tray balanced dangerously on the folds on my stomach flab. Everything on display looked divinely appealing. Apart from the first time tried, No-Lamb lamb steaks had been tried before, and nothing let me down. The expensive No-Lamb Lamb steaks were okay. But not worth the money. They were not as good as the No-Meat Burgers  I usually have. But Iceland doesn’t even have them on the list for sale now; I hope they get some more in soon. Humph! Anyway, I gave this pone a Taste-Rating of 9.2/10!

I put the tray on the carers table and promptly drifted off into a much-needed sleep… But not for long; half an hour later, the ♫ Oh, Susan ♫ tune awakened me with a shock!
Joseph arrived. At least I had some trousers on. No top clothing, though; I think the grossness of my blubbery stomach shook him a bit. Hahaha! Poor lad. Got the meds sorted, and I offered Joseph a drink or nibble in thanks, and he refused them – that’s Valerie then Joe? Wished him a good evening as he departed with the waste bag for the bin. (I remembered to ask him to take the bag tonight) I locked the door and climbed back into the recliner to get back to sleep.
A futile effort in my gaining any time with Sweet Morpheus. I lay there, well, getting up a few times for a wee-wee, for an hour or two, then got up and back on the computer to update this blog and then lay out the Snippets one. Did the Ode below and got it on. Then posted it off to WordPress.

I made so many mistakes in getting this ode from CorelDraw into this blog that I got the first verses out of sync. But it’s now 00:45hrs, and am so tired. Luckily this ode is so bad, that you may not notice. Hehehe!

Inchcock’s Monday, 30th May 2022

MORNING THOUGHT STORMS ODE

ThoughtStorms attack when I’m not at my best…
Vulnerable, trying to sleep, or feeling undistressed,
The brain, with guilt, and fear, brings self-disgust…
I always get myself uptight and newly distressed…
There are no faults or mistakes that can’t be accessed!
Within minutes, I always become depressed!

The torrents of self-hate cannot be suppressed,
Regurgitated mistakes, from the first to the latest…
Minor, severe and the most pleasantest…
They even dig-up long gone thoughts, the absurdest,
Accepting the blame, taking it on the chin & chest…
I find it often less painful and the wisest!

DEMENTIA DOREEN ODE

I’ve considered booking a visit with a Gerontologist…
But I’d probably forget, and the appointment was missed!
As I did the other month with the dentist,
And every appointment with the chiropodist…
Oh, and last appointment with the urologist,
Can I get help from a witch doctor or voodooist?

Hot & cold water taps (faucets) left running,
Food forgot about cooking, burnt… burning,
Falls that leave me bruised and bleeding…
As for my decision-making, I call it dithering!
My concentration and memory constantly withering…
Vascular Dementia Doreen can be most gruelling!

AILMENTS ODE

Thought-Storms, can be depressing and belittling,
Falls on the sock glide, and I need disentangling…
Cataracts: things often walked into and banging,
Toe Stubbing daily; in fact, at this, I am excelling!
Peripheral neurotransmitters unfortunately dying,
Encouraging the odd right leg wobble and dancing…
Shuddering Shoulder Shirley has the torso flailing…

Duodenal Donald, Reflux Roger, need overhauling,
Mechanic ticker, my fungal lesion, need sorting…
Arthur Itis, Cartilage Kathy, need medicationalisationing…
Glaucoma Gladys, too, and my belching needs muzzling…
Bladder cancer, which can cause havoc wee-weeing!
The old hearing aids can be a little niggling,
But most of all, I could do with my brain recycling!

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

MONDAY 30th MAY 2022

03:15hrs: For the umpteenth time, I sprang into wakefulness. Pondered on getting up, I passed wind and belched, and then I nodded again.

Waking the next time, with the usual jerking and jumping, at 05:25hrs. My mind was confused before I got out of the £300 second-hand c1968 recliner to catch my balance; What day is it? Who’s calling today… is anyone. I think there is… As I rose, got dressed, and found myself in the kitchen, making up some waste bags?

I think I was talking aloud to myself as I suddenly decided to get the ablutions tended to. Off to the wet room with the towel from the airer…

I hit my shoulder on the way through the door; my spatial awareness was obviously impaired this morning. Even as Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley kicked off, I took this in my stride. Even started getting back interest and concentration. But the lackadaisicalness remained. I felt almost laid-back and unconcerned, accepted that things would happen, and saw no point worrying about something? (Not me, at all, what’s was going on here?) No shaving cuts, Dizzy Dennis or Shaking Shaun visits. As I was towelling off, I even remembered that my precious Hristina was on her way to take the DVT blood sample, and the Iceland order was coming twixt 8>10:00hrs.

I finished the waste bag  I’d started earlier and got the computer on. The WordPress blogger was still not letting me open the comments from the editor. Again my outlook changed… I surprised myself at how annoyed I became?

Oh, dearie me, what a messy visit to the Throne it was! Again, it felt like it would be challenging to get the movement started, so I  got the crossword book from the floor cabinet.

How wrong I was! After annoying myself further by failing to make progress with the crossword puzzle, the sloppy mess of an evacuation almost squirted out all over the place. It took me ages to get the area and myself cleaned up, and I was getting hotter under the collar all the time. I became fuming! I went from laid-back to apprehensive, insecure and somewhat pissed off with things?

I was now getting more flummoxed than angry! Changed my PPs (Protection Pants) Confusion Conrad was in charge.

I went back onto the computer and got some photographs loaded. The card reader working seemed to raise my up and down spirits a smidgeon when it let me get them on. This on the right is from last night; I got up at one of the spring awakes to take it.

What was going on with my mood swings? I didn’t understand. But I was whistling to myself as I took this snap of the end car park on Chestnut Way, just beyond Woodthorpe Court. I caught a moving vehicle today! Hehe!

I got the Blood-Pressure and temperature taken. Fair results on the Boot’s all Boot’s Sphygmomanometer, manufactured by ZDEAC (Zhongshan Daguan Electrical Appliance Company Ltd) in Guangdong, China.

My Chinese (Hong Kong) is made by Shenzhen Relee Electronic & Technology Co. Ltd™, contactless thermometer, showed a very low reading this Monday morning (Well. it would do, it’s Monday – Hahaha!), at 34°c.

I went to make a brew of Thompson’s Punjana tea, and ♫ Oh, Susana.. ♫ rang from the door chime. It was my new pal and Carer, Richard. I got him a cold drink to help him cool down; the lad has Diabetes, and sweats all the time, Bless him. A right pair we are; Richard is sweating while I am shivering. Hehe! He looked tired and said he’d not gotten much sleep during his couple of days off. Poor lad! He wasn’t moaning, just answering when I asked him how he’s been sleeping. Rich got the medications sorted and watched me take them, so I didn’t drop any. Then made the wristlet alarm check call for me. I wanted to natter away with him, but I could see he was all in, so I resisted.

After the man had departed, I went on the Google calendar. To check for anything I might have forgotten about. Or put on the wrong day and or time. Haha! Hehehe! I’ve just seen how funny that must have sounded, me; forgetting something… there’s almost a guarantee that I will! I got onto the Sunday blog, updated it, and posted it to WordPress. My gumption seems to have been lifted somewhat by seeing Richard, my Lionheart Carer. If he’s feeling better tomorrow, we can have a better nattering session.

Hello, I think someone above it having some repairs done. A lot of drilling and hammering noises started. Had a wee-wee.

Off to the wet room, I hobbled. I was bending down to retrieve a pencil I’d dropped, and as I wobbled down towards it… a warm damp sensation emanated from Little Inchies Fungal Lesion’s location inside the PPs! Only a tiny spot of bleeding; I was most surprised that it registered with the brain…

An unexpected case of, I got myself washed yet again, freshened up the wee-wee-sprayed legs, and put the trousers in soak. On my removing the pants to put new ones on, what had happened became embarrassingly apparent. It’s a good life innit old age! However, I coped with it pretty calmly, especially compared to how things were earlier in the morning! In fact, I adopted a well deserved.

I was doing the top ode for this blog, and ♫ Oh, Susana.. ♫ rang from the door chime. This time it was heaven-sent Hristina. The DVT haematology nurse comes to take my blood sample for the Warfarin test. Now my spirits were at their peak for the day!

I’d let her down, though. I’d let Dementia Doreen allow me to throw away the wrong part of last week’s assessment and dosages record. She was so sweet about it, though. It caused her to be delayed a while, having to make up a new one. Selfishly, it gave my eyes a little longer to cast over her beauty… Getting carried away there, sorry!

The free Iceland delivery arrived. And the man out the carriers in the doorway for me. But, after getting them through to the kitchenette to sort out, I found a few things that I was not too happy about. I had ordered three 500g bags of small Jersey new potatoes… This above on the right is what they substituted them with: Three 2.5kg bags of potatoes! Is that not 25 times more spuds than I ordered? Hailing Professor Bill Ziegler, in Lab 28, at Manor Laboratories Time Machine Creation wing! (He has a slide rule, you see!), and Tim Price in New Mexico (He has a Mac computer!) for help. And neither of them suffers from Arithmophobia, like wot I do. Hehehe!

However, they also had no (6) sliced bread rolls (£1). But substituted rolls of four rolls that were 2 for £1, charging 85p! I think? Anyway,  they also sent Moroccan tomatoes. That was my own fault (Doreen Dementia, perhaps?) for forgetting how foul they tasted last time I got some! I suppose I could put them out for the rats, but I’m not that cruel! The Strawberries, 3 for £5, two had a day’s life, the other today’s date! They had some beefburger cobs for Richard’s treats on the plus side.

The fridge was looking fuller now, at least. Some stuff is inedible, like the killer tomatoes from Morocco. You’d have laughed seeing me try to make room in the freezer for the potato chips to get in. I distinctly remember being dubious over which of the two packets above to buy, and at the time of my ordering, I realised that there would only be room for one. I thought I’d only ordered one of them… Dementia Doreen again?

After spending several hours writing and amending my mistakes on this blog, I decided it was time to get some nosh… Great balls of fire! It’s 17:00hrs already!!!! The evening carer will be here soon! Gotten Himmel, where did the day go?

Hehe! I took a picture of the evening sky before it started getting dark. Please tell me you can see an animal in the clouds… this was probably noticed with the help of Cataract Kathleen, with support from Glaucoma Gladys.

I made an order for Morrisons to save having it at the weekend. I hope I can get the chips into the fridge… that’s the real reason I ordered this: the fresh curry battered chips. They tasted fantabulous! Guilty!

Got the nosh sorted out. I halved the potatoes I boiled earlier and got them in the oven to crisp off. There are a few crappy, horrible halved Moroccan tomatoes (Eurgh!), the last veg burger, and the last honey yoghourt. It was not too good. Taste 3.3/10.

I was just finishing with the meal, and ♫ Oh. Susana ♫ chimed out, and in came Carer Valerie. Val got the medications sorted, and I took them. I’m glad it was Val cause O could give her one of the massive bags of potatoes that Iceland overloaded me with and know they will not go to waste. The other one is for Richard in the morning, that is, if he wants it, of course. (Well, it seemed a good idea? Hehe!) Thanked Valerie; she took the waste bag as she left; bless her.

Then, the most dubious mission of the day… Trying to get and stay asleep! Mission impossible? Yes, it was! I put the TV on, there was nothing to watch, but that didn’t matter. Usually, I nod off during the commercial breaks, which I did on just about every one of them for three hours, but I only slept for a few minutes, and I shot back awake all the time (of the three hours). Sweet Morpheus was in a proper cantankerous mood!

Memo Mortalium Omnibus Horis Sapit!

March 1st 2020: Inchcocks Diary

Tuesday, March 1st 2020

The Monday Nosh… Ode

It doesn’t look like it would get the taste-buds tingling,
Baked potatoes, sausages… something was missing?
But did I care? No, for the eyelids were drooping…
I wasn’t really eating, just refuelling…
The taste buds were pleased, the stomach revelling…
In as tastier a meal for months, I was eating!
The Thought Storms came but were untroubling!
I know, it’s so rare, but tiredness was growing…
The little banana for dessert, I was enjoying…
A lemon & lime yoghourt… I was happily guzzling!

Peripheral Neuropathy Pete attacked me, what for?
The yoghourt fell down my legs onto the floor!
Shaking-Shoulder Shirley joins in, and furthermore…
The TV remote flew away; where to? I’m not sure!
A right mess to sort out, but I did perdure…
No injuries, bruises or blood, but this, I can assure…
It left me with my sanity a little insecure!
Save some of the food to eat later? No, It’d lost its allure!

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

The March Begins...

Another very decent night’s sleep! I reckon six hours. With only two spring-awakes! I lay pondering on what’s what for today demand-wise. After a couple of minutes, I realised two things; ① It was late, and the mooring carer was almost due. ② I needed the Porcelain Throne. So, hoping for a better evacuation than yesterday, and having taken a few capsules of Dioctyl yesterday after the concrete-like evacuation, I bravely limped off and ventured to the wet room! Haha!

Another release, similar to yesterday’s but far more manageable in comparison. Which foolishly made me think, well, that’s better, perhaps things might improve today… What an idiot! You’d have thought I’d have learned by now, wouldn’t you?

While in there, I thought I’d get the ablutionisationing done. So I did! The teeth and nasal cleaning went fine. The shaving too, only thee tiny nicks two on the chin, one on the ear lobe. I can recall saying my Alto-Ego saying something like; Let’s not get over-confident, Inchcock, no more banging into owt or tumbling over. I know you’re worried about the Carer coming but just take care!”

Not a single banging into anything, only a handful of dropsies; I got the showering done post-haste without rushing and got the same feeling as when I woke up… a foolish feeling of semi-contentment and a smidgeon of a Smug-Mode. No toe-stubbing, no walking into the door frame on leaving the wet room; a full-on Smug-Mode was adopted! I hobbled into the kitchenette to make a brew. As cheery as is possible for me, and no particular reason, other than this threatening semi-confidence in its going to being a betterer day today? Worryingly!

The only ailments hassle were Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley and Cartilage Cathy. I got the kettle on as ♫ Oh Susan ♫ rang out, and Carer Richard came in. He got the medications, and alert wristlet alarm check done, then handed me a camera he says he does not use. That was kind. I gave him the new far too big to fit anywhere air fryer I’d foolishly bought. Exchange is no robbery, as they used to say. Hehehe!

Being his last call, we had an excellent nattering session and laugh or two, the moan, and I enjoyed it so much. Richard made for his bed, and I don’t blame him! Haha!

I made the brew and nearly moped the kitchen floor, but I left it for her to do as Esther might call. I got on the computer, but it was not good. The Peripheral Neuropathy nerve ends always start, contacting and losing it when I’m typing! It never fails. Grrr! So progress was snail-paced, made worse by all the errors and correctionalisationing I had to cope with.

I took a break and had a close look at the Fuji camera Carer Richard had kindly donated. Put some batteries in that didn’t work. Then looked on the web and found out how, or which way around they have to go, and wallah! It worked! I didn’t use it then, as updating Monday’s blog was so far behind. Got back to blogging…

The intercom rang, and it was the Iceland delivery that I’d forgotten all about coming. I know… Dementia Doreen strikes again! Because I could use neither camera, cause the computer card reader did not recognise them, I used an old one from file here; I’m getting fed up with this palaver every day. Got the fodder stored away and found an exciting occurrence, even for Iceland! ① The strawberries I ordered were on the last day before consuming; they sent them for free. ② Again, they substituted ordinary sausages for the microwave ones I’d ordered (Sent back). ③ Substituted water for another brand, same price. ④ No fresh peas. ⑤ No microwave sausages. Choices are getting sparse in all of the stores now, for supplies. Oh, dearie me!

He was working well all day today; he was noisy so often. But none of the bouts lasted for too long, so no complaints.

I eventually got yesterday’s blog completed and sent off. Went on Facebook, then WordPress Reader. Got around to doing Email checks and then WordPress comments. Had some long ones today, which put me further behind. Haha! But they are welcome; I love getting messages and comments.

Then, the arrival of cleaning operative dominatoress Esther. She was collecting the laundry. She told me to take off my shirt, and she’d take that. I asked if she could mop the kitchen floor for me later – But No! She doesn’t like my mop and bucket. So I gave her some money, as she said she’d get one she likes. Obviously, every time she comes, she’s talking and walking into other rooms without stopping… I reckon I heard about 40% of what she said. Hehehe! Someone else who one can’t do anything right, but can’t help still love ’em!

She took the laundry with someone else’s, and I treated myself to a banana. Do you see the size of it? Miniature, I think, Hahaha! But they just sit me down to the ground.

Tried to get on with the blog again… Oh, no, such luck! The Amazon delivery arrived. In it were three things; ① Treats for the nurses, Carers and (kind only) delivery people, in the form of some cans of Southern Comfort Whiskey & cola. ② A tray of 12 cans of Beef Chilli (for Josie’s Sunday meals), and ③ 24 cans of garden peas, I got these cause they are hard to find nowadays after the Covid-virus estimated staff levels. Iceland has stopped selling them altogether. Sainsbury’s have put theirs up from 30p to 50p! Ocado’s only brand they sell now is £1.49 a can!!! So, I got these in before they rise anymore in price! Argh! It’s getting worse. The rents have just been increased, and electricity is going up by 15% this month. Get it while you can, I say!

I took the rubbish from the delivery to the waste chute. Trapped a finger end in the cast iron lid, pulled my hand away sheepishly, and hit the knuckle on the edge of the metal lid.

I thought the day had started so well, too!

I was reet wee’d-off when I hobbled back to the flat. I decided to try on the Fuji camera again and got it going!!! These are the photos I took with the Carer Richard gifted Fuji.

I’ve got to work out how to get different sized pictures, but not now; too much left to do on the blog and running out of time, energy and willpower.

I took a shot of HRH Lisa’s presents, Marie’s Koala Katie, and Patties Teddy Bear, who have all become members of my family now and are chatted to and given a cuddle in their turn, every day in passing. 💜

I poddled off into the kitchen, taking this photographicalisation en route. It was not as dark as this came out, but the flash worked on it. I saw the potatoes on the counter near the microwave and realised I’d not had anything to eat today… Ooh! I tell a fib, I had the baby banana. Haha!

I opened the window, and I took this effort of the teatime view of the darkening but still pretty looking skies over Sherwood.

The ♫ Oh, Susana ♫ tune brought forth my Caring Angel, Julia! 💖

I instantly became another person; depression and worries faded, to be replaced with joy and admiration. Julia is such a caring Carer and is so helpful to me. We managed a little gossiping laughter, and she, as usual, brought my spirits up from the depths I was in before she arrived. Luckily, I was just replying to an Email from sweet Jenny, in which she mentioned the strawberries, which reminded me of the packet I had in the fridge for the evening Carer. I think I may have looked and appeared to be with it, by remembering… but words kept leaving me as I was talking, which soon had me back as a recognisable dodo! Hehehe! 

Julia departed, and the dark depression of frustration soon returned. Also, the damned computer was not recognising the SD card again. Grrr! Damnangles and Groggleturds!

I pressed on with the blogging, making so many mistakes you wouldn’t believe it. Suddenly, as I got up for a wee-wee…

It was gone 23:00hrs! And I’d still had nowt to eat! I decided to pack in on the computer. So I did! I’ll have to do my best to catch up tomorrow.

Oh, no, I’ll read and reply to any comments on WordPress first. Three or four had come in.

Phew! Finally… at the end of the day (literally midnight), very most belatedly, at long last, I managed to get some nosh prepared! Despite feeling spot weary, I had the impulse for fish! So made a plate of battered fish fingers, fishcakes with peas in batter, potato waffles, yellow, red and black tomatoes for lunch, or dinner, no, supper. Maybe even breakfast? Hehehe! Another mini-baby banana, a pot of lemon & lime mousse, and two tiny tea cakes. No guilt filtered through at all! But it did after. Tsk! Taste Rating; 8.6/10, it went down a treat!

As I prepped for kipping sent took off the wristwatch, it seemed that it left a splat of bruising around the wrist? Not that it hurt at all, but once I detached the reluctant-to-leave my skin, watch, it started itching. Not that it woke me or anything. I was out of it for four hours solid! Again, praise to the Hemp capsules!

The London Philharmonic Orchestra could have come in the flat and performed Tchaikovsky’s 1812 Overture around the Beige, second-hand, £300, c1968, uncomfortable, recliner…

It reminds me, I also took a Dioctyl and some Docusate. The rock-solid evacuations might ease a little in the morning. Did you see that? That was me being optimistic!!! Me! Me? Worrying, innit?

 

Inchcock Today: 28th February 2022 with Odes

I woke very late, Carer due, logicality was absent,
Slowly the brain cleared of the confusion and addlement,
I worked out I’d slept for six hours, to my astonishment,
I seemed to have a decent, calm, unruffled temperament,
Yet despite the wonderfully sleeping so well, erubescent,
I felt so tired, weary, it made me think belligerent…
First decent sleep for ages, I should have been verklempt?
The Thought Storms started, they were soon unblent…
As off to the Porcelain Throne, I hurriedly went!

MONDAY 28th FEBRUARY 2022

I stirred, without any jumping awake, around 0640hrs, had the Carer been on time, they’d have found snoring away. Hahaha!

I worked out that I’d been in the arms of Sweet Morpheus for about six hours! Fought off the Thought-Storms, with the aid of needing to use the Porcelain Throne.

I rose up onto my aching for some reason feet and found that Cartilage Cathy had departed from the right knee – which of course should have given me some glee, but, you see… Arthur Itis had returned with a vengeance in both knees! So, hobbling about is going to be a smidge painful today. Methinks.

CW05I wobbled my way to the wet room, sat, and waited… waited some more. Got the crossword book out. Then, still awaiting the commencement of any evacuation movement, I counted the veins on my right thigh. Back to the crossword puzzle, solved about three or four more clues, actually. Not the time for any Smug-Moding. Still not a sign of any rear-end activity!

I knew this was going to hurt, but I had to apply maximum pushing level from within to move the product, which at first came out a smidge, then froze again. I kept giving it some effort, painfully, but it was still a while before things restarted? I began to fear what this was doing to Haemorrhoid Harold. How much blood is already beneath me in the porcelain? The last bit took the monumental endeavour, and I kid you not, had tears forming.

As I stood gingerly up and turned to investigate the contents of the WC… No blood whatsoever! The concrete-like turds had somehow all sank? Only the pain remained. But it was subsiding all the time. It eased more rapidly after I’d cleaned things up and applied the precious Germoloids ointment to the rear end. For some MedPhorpainreason, I felt I could so easily get back in the recliner and back to sleep. And wanted to! Then I liberally applied the Phorpain Gel to both Arthur Itis’s knees and gave it a good rubbing in! Put a dab of Germolene on the arm where I walked into the doorframe yesterday. I didn’t mean to! Hehe! It’s surprising how a nothing bruise like that can hurt? Not that I’m complaining, after the Porcelain Session agony. Even I’ve got to laugh!

Got the computer on, and ♫ Of Susana ♫ rang out. It was the Carer Richard arriving. A good lad, who’s been down a little lately, but I can report that he was his old self again this morning! I don’t mind him coming later cause if I am the last call, we usually have a natter after the medications and Alarm wristlet battery checks. I took an anti-Constipation-Konrad capsule and a Docusate sachet drink. I don’t fancy going through that again on the next visit to the Porcelain Throne! There must be people out there that when they need a crap, just go and do it! Painlessly! I have things swapping twixt the extremes every day or so. Constipation Konrad and Trotsky Terence are on a daily challenge to control the bowels! Passing things pain-free would be great for me… but I’m not jealous! Hehehe!

I pressed on with yesterday’s blog and got it posted off.

With getting up so late, the day has vanished before my eyes… it’s flashing by, and such a lot to do yet…

The shower, shaving and Teggie-cleaning, apart from hitting my head on the power-box once again, went very well.

Getting dressed went okay, but the medicationalisationing had its moments of farce. I ended up with

I checked on the end car park… No, the photograph has not been doctored! It really is the red van’s man’s car, parked between the lines, and in the car park, as opposed to his usual blocking the entry/exit on the chevron lines. I wanted to congratulate him, but of course, being whoever he is, he’s parked in the Contractors Only Parking Space. Hahaha! But at least he’s found his way into the car park and not blocking things, so. Well done, mush!

Hello, the intercom is flashing? It was the Wilko delivery. ♫ Oh, Susana ♫ was chiming out from the doorbell when the driveress arrived. A helpful gal, who took the boxes into the kitchen and checked the number of items, blessed her cotton socks. I am a little concerned about the size of the box containing the Air-Cooker. I thought I’d ordered the smallest one? I’m going to struggle to get that on the minimal space available in the kitchenette? Oh, dearie me! It may have to be given away or sold to someone with more room? Still, Carer Richard is calling another da this week, and he has one. In fact, he encouraged me to get one. So, I’ll ask him to open the box to set it up when he calls, or if he hasn’t the time, I’ll ask him to put it in the other room for me, it’s blinking heavy, so it must be a big one… Tsk! I must get something right one day!

I went on Facebooking next to catch up again. Then WP reading. Then comments.

Carer Irana… Iyrana, Irayna… can’t remember her name now… Tsk! I’ll ask the morning Carer. Pretty young thing. We chatted throughout, had a laugh and shared quips. Gave her the blog name. Nice gal, soon had me sorted with the medications. In the A.M., Richard found the new sweet Carer gals name was Isra!

Sorted a meal out. (The photos on the SD would not load again) Baked potatoes, sausages and BBQ sauce. Taste: 7.2/10.

Watched some TV and found myself nodding off, so I gave up and got my head down, about midnight.

Ode to an Odd Day…

At times it went rather abysmally…
With the rare usual periods, delusionally,
Moments of it going fantastically…
Mostly though, sort of confusionally!
More than usual, of the farcically!

The Porcelain Throne session, agonistically!
The brain mainly operated dysfunctionally,
But deliveries, Carers were a joy, actually…
The ablutions were unconditional agony,
Constipation Konrad in control, evilly!

Peripheral Pete was acting erratically,
Shakings, shuddering, running free!
The Thought-Storm attacks, aberrantly,
All of these, scary or ambiguously…
Oh, I did sleep well nocturnally!

Carers Richard & Isra were friendly and chatty,
I love a chinwag, someone to talk with me…
Others too natter, Julia, Elena and Charley,
I’ll press on now, somewhat melancholically…
I’ve had days that went more maniacally,
It was also a bad day, neurophysiologically!

It’s Tuesday now…

It’s Tuesday now, March… and I feel garrulous!
My judging the proximity of stuff circumforaneous,
Everything around me seems dimorphous…
Knowing which is which can be vexatious,
Now I’ve gone and got tinnitus!

Poor old sausage! Hehehe!

Inchcock Today: Monday 21st February 2020

Inchcock Today: Monday 21st February 2020

I’m fighting depression; not so much about the cataracts worries, deafness, Peripheral Neuropathy, or Dizzy Dennis visits this time. Can’t load photos, Liberty-Global Virgin Media, and it’s so slow! Mainly due to computer problems.

02:30hrs: I woke and rose this morning, with a terrible foreboding of what is to follow today. Nothing specific, but my EQ warned me that things would not go well. That was all I needed as if I wasn’t low enough to start with!

In between a few wee-wees, I made up some bottles of spring water with lime & lemon cordial. No interest in making a brew? What? And got on to the computer, with an unconfident hope that the photos would load this time…

No-go! I’ve got the meal from last night and some photos I took of the BBC Midland News on the card to use on a snippets blog. I didn’t take any other pictures in anticipation of my luck remaining at the usual level of atrocious.

I finished last nights blog and posted it off. Then went on the WP Reader, comments, and started doing a graphic.

04:10hrs, I heard some clattering from the flat above, not a lot, and not too bad. 

Made a start on this blog, and the blustering winds got up so bad. Also, some noises sound like humming machinery, so loud, from above. What’s going on?

I decided to get the ablutionisationing done, stand-up, no showering cause the noise might disturb anyone sleeping. Put the computer into sleep mode. Back in a while… I hope!

Upon my way to the wet room with the day clothes, I discovered the reason behind one of the many noises this Monday morning. As I passed by the airing cupboard and tank room, without my hearing aids in, I heard a noise of water running into the tank occasionally; this is accompanied by a comical gurgling sound? I took the camera in with me out of habit, so I took some photos after the session. Hope they can be uploaded with time… He says without much confidence…

I started with nose and teeth cleaning. Then a need for the Porcelain Throne arose (it does that often, I’ve noticed that).

What a  near-perfect evacuation that ever was! A smooth flow that needed little effort from me. Not phooey! Not runny, not messy. There was a tiny few bits of blood, but the dark red indicated they were from Harold’s Haemorrhoids, so nowt to worry about there! I moved on to readying the shaving tackle things.

I made a tiny cut trying to shave the neck-hole. (“Why when all my hair went years ago; does hair still grow around the neck, and behind the ear-holes? Just a thought”). No Accifauxpas, toe-stubbings, or walking into anything!!! Fair enough, three or four razor drops, but they all fell in the sink, so even that was lucky!

All went well. No need for any attention to Little Inchies fungal lesion – Hurray! Then got dressed… The PP’s first, then the dangerous job… Arthur Itis and Cartilage Kathy, both being very stiff this morning, I ended up having to use Sock-Glide-Glenda! The blister-making and blood-lusting Green Goddess! And she kept up her record of injuring me but not so bad as usual. She’s getting older now? Hahaha!

Just had to take a photo, not being sure if I’d get it on but did later, of the masterstroke of using the precocious Sock-Glide-Glenda. During this procedure, I needed three wee-wees! Sod-it, off again! I hope things calm down soon!

I then took a photograph of the car park at the dead-end of Chestnut Way.

The red-van-man was back in his usual line and chevrons ignoring parking spot. The rain and wind were still so heavy I took this picture through the balcony’s glass.

 

♫ Oh, Suzana ♫ chimed out – Carer Richard arrived, in a rush, no time for a chinwag. He soon got the medications and alarm battery check done for me. I think Rich was having problems. Richard was not his usual self at all this morning. Hope he’ll be alright. He asked for a bottle of water, I got him one from the stockpile in the kitchen, but he didn’t like the M&S brand, said it was ‘crap’, I’ll have a Highland one, so I gave him a Highland one. Ha! Said he might be coming on Tuesday, I think, he said. He kindly took the little blue waste bag with him, to the chute, for me.

Sphygmomanometerisationing, at last, showed a lower SIA reading on the Blood pressure. Nice! As was the DIA and Pulse results. Then I got the body temperature taken. That was a smidge higher for once, close to the red-line minimum of 35°c. But not quite there yet, but it’s good to have near enough not to ring anyone as I have been instructed to.

An hour or so struggling with the slow computer, in getting some photos on at last to use. The intercom lit up and buzzed; it was the Iceland delivery arriving. The chap looked soaking-sodden wet, poor thing when he got to the door. He put the bags through to the doorway into the hall for me, only four today, missing items, I bet. Or, mayhaps I curtailed the demands this time? (Only 1 item had to be substituted, and two not available) I did well in the fridge department. I got the diced beef chunks. BBQ Rustlers, BBQ flavoured chips, and frozen beefburgers. I thank you!

A nice filled-fridge again, that’ll do me nicely until the following Monday, methinks. So glad you get the Wall’s microwaveable sausages too!

I’d ordered the wrong potatoes, I noticed. All those cakes, I honestly can’t remember ordering… no, honestly! Ahem! I wanted the Baking ones to try some cheesy potato-making again… Tsk!

I got a packet of the beef chunks in the slow-cooker. They should be ready for tonight’s nosh. I added some BBQ beef gravy seasoning to the slow-cooker pan and a drop of the liquid smoke – a spur of the moment decision… Mmm…

I dropped a packet of beef chunks off for Jenny and Frank; they can do what they like with it. Eat it or give it to a worthy cause. Bless them. Back up to the twelfth floor, and as I was entering the outer flat lobby…

Hehehe! I didn’t half-clout my shoulder on the door frame! I felt such a fool! But there was nobody around to hear the slightly unavuncular language that I muttered. I’d done an excellent job on the shoulder; I got inside and took an extra Codeine and back on the computer blogging.

While I’d been out, the photo thingy had opened on its own, and I got the photo of last nights meal before the program all froze up again. Humph!.

Garden peas, a whole packet, cause they were short-dated from Sainsbury’s. Fish sticks, tomatoes (Lovely they were), buttered sourdough sliced bread (Gorgeous!), a mini lemon cheesecake, and a cheesy twist. I recall eating this with relish. Flavour Rating from memory; 8/10

Then I started prepping the Local News Snipping blog.

Dizzy Dennis cometh on an unwanted visit. I gave up on the computer, with Cataracts Katie and Dennis it was impossible.

Made some nosh. A decent effort methought, but the flavour did not match the viewing. Taste rating: 7/10. The late dated J Sainsbury’s podded peas let it all down, and I do love them usually, but not these out of date ones.

Cheeky Charlie Carer came. Told me off, gave me the medications. She chose a Gin mix and Easter egg for treats, and left without taking the waste bags… but I noticed, and shot out of the door to catch her, asking her to take them…

Serves me right. I clouted my shoulder on the door frame getting back inside. Tsk!

Sleep was hard to get into, and it took me a few hours for some reason. However, once off into the land of nod, I only shot-awake three times overnight. I wonder if the Hemp is working?

Inchcock Today: Sat-Sun 12/13 February 2022

Did you see that? I even got the year wrong! Dementia Doreen at work?

I woke up this morning (Sunday) not feeling giddy…
Because I’d had a better sleep? Definitely!
I’d woke up over the night, just six times, you see,
Many of my ailments were not bothering me!
Hard to believe it’s my unlucky Sunday!

But, things felt wrong, different, most notably…
The dreaded Hum, so much louder than ever, unfamiliar…
My nerve-ends continued with their uncontrollability,
But with other pains not here, that’s almost a triviality,
Although the eyes were terrible, cataractically!

If I get a Carer call, with they show uncongeniality?
I shall try today to be calm and avoid perversity…
Contain my nit-picking, self-loathing, and animosity…
I’m too nervous about claiming I can have unflappability,
Dementia Doreen gives the brain ungovernability,
She changes my mood so quickly… The audacity!

Saturday

Saturday was a daymare! The eyes delayed all I tried to do. Not that I tried to do much, other than blogging, for over eleven hours in total. I was up from 02:40hrs in the morning until 21:00hrs at night! Computerisationing the majority of the time. Cataracts Kathleen, Peripheral Neuropathy Pete, occasionally bothered further by Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley and Dizzy Dennis.

I created a Local News Snippets blog (now finally finished off and posted this morning, Sunday). You would not believe the mistakes, errors and messes I got myself into! Nothing else much was done at all. I did find some photographs on the SD card that prompted memories of Saturday if I can recall. Here they are with notes I’m part guessing at about them. Not many. And they may be our order chronologically, on Saturdays, sorry.

These sunset shots were, I believe, from Friday night. The first two in sequence, I have caught some Crows that had just broken up from a murder in the treetops to the right of the picture.

They were fully grown adults, judging by their sizes of them. In the second picture, I caught two of them. They were flying away from the flats at the time. I remember being surprised that I could recognise them.

The following two nights, the sunsets were hardly noticeable. But these ones, I thought, were so beautiful, even with muted colours (Is that the right word? I mean, not as vivid as it is sometimes).

I took just the higher part of the sky in the last photo, and I zoomed in an iota. The seemingly pink cloud amidst the blue-grey ones was so pretty to me. Mother Nature at her finest! ♥

I first utilised the A&D Medical Supplies, made in China Blood Pressure Monitor. Cor Blimey! Yet another near-perfect result. I believe I assumed a Smug-Mode!

Pulse at 73 looked good. The Chinese (Hong Kong) made by Shenzhen Relee Electronic & Technology Co. Ltd©, a contactless thermometer, was used to take the body temperature. 34.2°c. A bit low?

The rest of the day was a bit of horror. Really frustrating and depressing for this non-compos-mentis, mentally & physically deranged, ailing old Inchcock. I fear the time is rapidly approaching when I’ll no longer be capable of blogging. Although Vascular Dementia Doreen sees to be affecting me more nowadays. If cataracts, glaucoma and saccades are ever repaired, that could be a life-saver…

Many hours later, I got the nosh prepared. Which also seemed to take an inordinately long time to do. I think it was through my depression and frustration, but I couldn’t eat much of the meal, despite it being tasty enough. A decent 7.5/10 for flavour content.

Washed the pots, had a wash and put the TV on to watch my favourite ‘Heartbeat’ two back-to-back episodes. Naturally, I fell asleep at the first set of advertisements that came on. Humph!

The ♫ Oh, Susana ♫ tune of the door chime rang out and woke me up. Carer Valerie arrived.

It was only about ten minutes into the second episode of ‘Heartbeat’, so I thought I’d watch that one. I was wrong! Nodded-off again. Woke to want a wee-wee, and ‘Hetty Wainthrop’ was starting on the box – Oh, good! I thought, had my painful slow trickling wee-wee, washed my hands and settled to watch Hetty… Zzz! 

Amazingly, I slept through for about four hours, lovely! Then the waking up with a jolt started again! Can’t win them all!

SUNDAY

With six sudden awakenings since around midnight, on this seventh one, I stayed up. I had to get up for Porcelain Throne duties anyway. Off to the wet room…

Rushing to get to the Throne, I misjudged the gap again. I walloped my right shoulder against the doorframe. There were some bits of bleeding from Harold’s Haemorrhoids. Nothing too serious, though.

Expecting a messy evacuation again, I had a go at the crossword after getting seated. But didn’t have time to do many clues. The evacuation was a slow job, that needed a fair bit of pushing input from me. Not awfully painful, just uncomfortable. This I put down to Harold’s Haemorrhoids. This is a strange day!

It seemed I’d got out of the right side of the bed this morning? Despite the painful Whoopsiedangleplops and Accifauxpas, I was singing away to myself as I washed and oiled the earholes? In fact, I was rather upbeat in my thoughts, too! Well, well! This is a strange day!

Josie last week

Cleaned up and got changed into the day clothes. I remembered that I’d not put the laundry away from yesterday yet. So, I did.

I went to sort the prepping for Josies’ Sunday lunch. All foods to hand, and I got the chilli with some extra beans in the pan. Added the mushrooms, crispy bacon pieces, chestnuts, and diced in some tomatoes. Mild chill and BBQ seasoning, a splash of anchovies sauce, and tomatoes puree. All ready to tackle later on for the gal.

I took a wee-wee, washed the dandies, and got the Boot’s Sphygmomanometer, made by the ZDEAC (Zhongshan Daguan Electrical Appliance Company Ltd©) in Guangdong, China. The results had crept up a smidge from yesterday. But it is only just in the lower stages of hypertension and has been a lot higher on many occasions. Certainly not enough to destroy my strangely volatile good spirits. That has come from I know not where but is welcome.

The Chinese (Hong Kong) made by Shenzhen Relee Electronic & Technology Co. Ltd™, contactless thermometer, had a better reading than yesterday too! A good bit higher.

The ♫ Oh, Susana ♫ tune burst forth, I thought at first, with no one coming in, it was the Iceland Delivery, and someone had let him in, but no! It was the new Carer, Kiya. She has a bouncy, outgoing nature; it seems like she’s done the job before to me. Quick-witted, sharp, communicative, and very pretty! Kiya got the job done, we had a laugh or two, she’s sleeping very well at the moment, she said. Treated her to the nibble-treats, and off she went with a cheery farewell. I didn’t realise until later that she had not taken the three bags of waste with her. Humph!

The intercom flashed and rang… and I heard in the other room. This is a strange day!

The deliver chappie arrived at the door; he looked a smidge down in the mouth.

So after he’s put the bags into the hallway for me, I treated him to a can of his choice (Cider), thanked him, and got them into the kitchenette for sorting out.

There were two substitutes and four missing items. At least the substitutes sent were alright for me for once. The big bag of potatoes looked fresh, I thought…

I utilised the picker-upperer. And this one is one of the better, stronger ones. But it only just managed to lift the weight of the extremely heavy cheese-topped cobs! As I knocked the cheesy cobs off the trolley, they made a thudding sound as they hit the floor! Blimey, they were weighty!

Got the fresh strawberries delivered as well. One each for Josie, Flora and Richard. Not sure if the ladies name is Flora, it might be Flo Francis? Anyway, she lives in flat 8. I’ll take it down for her later on. (What the heck is her name?)

The Walls microwave sausages are for me; I’ve three packets in x6. Four sausages and baked beans flavoured with chilli, BBQ and Worcester sauce is the plan for tonight. Of course, then there is the challenge of breaking the cheesy rolls to dunk in the juice. I could well injure myself judging by how hard they are. Thanks, Iceland! I might use the drill on them?

Took a break and replied to emails and comments. Lovely one from HRH Lisa and comments from Billum.

Then I got Josie’s meal ready. I gave her some extras for Easter. A little egg, a chocolate bar, and her favourite can of plonk. I also handed over half of my strawberries in a separate bag.

Then I took the waste bags out to the chute room. And, I’d like to add (Smug Mode Assumed!); totally without any Accifauxpas or Whoopsiedangleplops! No trapped fingers, no walking into anything, no visits from either Dizzy Dennis or Shaking Shaun!

I’ve just come to the following line in the blog reminder pad. I’m curious to know what the heck this is on the left here; it is supposed to indicate for me to remember? Looks like 3 40ging? It’s beyond me! Mind you, I’m not surprised. I can’t even see what I’m writing, let alone read or see the subtitles on the TV.

Then I found this picture I’d missed from the SD card. It is sad, innit?

Vascular Dementia Doreen is active again, I see! I think I took this one earlier today when I got out of the wet room. On the other hand, it could be from yesterday… any day, any month…

Spent more hours doing the blog, then took the strawberries down to… ah, I think her name might be Doris? Anyway, she seemed to like them, bless her.

My next plan… get the bangers and beans done for my nosh. I found out what I thought I’d bought, Cheese topped rolls, turned out to be Tiger rolls. That’s why they were so heavy. Humph!

The beans and sausages were a bit of a disappointment, I fear. The baked beans tasted so different to what I anticipated? The little pots I made pots of mandarins in orange juice and some black grapes for dessert were excellent! Overall, a Taste Rating of 6.5/10.

Did the washing up and sat to watch an old film on the goggle-box. Fell asleep at the first commercial break. Woken well over an hour later, by the new Carer gal, Kiya looming over me asking if it’s alright if she puts the light on. Hehehe! She’d not pressed the door chime. I wish she would have, I mean… I could have been in physical rapture with a young lady on the carpet… Well, okay, not that then! Hahaha!

Kiya was in a good mood tonight. We had a little natter and laughed after doing the medications given. She stayed close by while I took them to check that none had come out through a big gap that used to be filled by teeth.

Off she trotted with a treat in thanks, and I had a wee-wee, washed, got into the night attire and back to the second-hand, £300, c1968, overwhelmingly-sickeningly beige coloured, tatty, uncomfortable, wobbly-recliner.

I spotted a blue tablet on the floor. Only Warfarin tablets are blue. So, it seems I had dropped or regurgitated a tablet after all? That was with two of us watching? Bit of a mystery here?

Zzz!