Incoercible Inchy: Thursday 11th July 2024

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Possibly my most confusing day for weeks now.
In and out of control of things and happenings.
One late morning and Gawd knows how many more throughout the day.
I can’t recall being in such confusion for a long time.
I found out later that I’d placed an order for J Sainsbury. But it’s all a mystery to me. Looking at what I ordered really made me wonder how the hell, why, and when I made it.
I can’t help but occasionally worry about it and myself.

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It’s too dark yet again. It usually clears a bit later.

Taken while getting the Nocturnal Cather Pouch unattached. The white spot is the flash from Kodak Tim.

Made up a waste bag and hoovered around the main room. It’s that Inchy, you know, forever dropping crumbs, pens, torches, mobile phones (when he can find them), and anything else that is not attached to him is droppable, really.

Ablutions, medications & Porcelain Throne Visit(s)
I carried out another Whoopsiedangleplop after the first painful use of the Porcelain Throne – I forgot all about, or maybe I might have thought I’d done it, the shaving!
As with yesterday’s first attempt, the movement was showing no signs of any interest in escaping the depths of my heavily fabbed body and innards.
So, I got the crossword book out. Flipped it open and started on the random one. I also got a few answers; I got two more answers anyway. Then, the pain started, which again caught me by surprise. All the signs were that it was going to be a Trotsky effort. To take my mind off the pain, I counted the cracks on the wet room ceiling for a while. There were 27 cracks up there, I think. The pain suddenly reached a crescendo, and a tear came to my eyes; I gritted the few teeth I had left in my mouth, cringed and anticipated that a lot of blood would need cleaning up when it finally arrived. As it almost shot out, the pain eased, and the plump, plump… plumps were heard as the almost cube-shaped giant, Kharki-coloured Oxo cubes hit the water – to be followed by what I thought would have been the first things to exit… Whoosh, splatter, all done! I reckon it was controlled by 15% of Constipation Conrad; the rest was definitely a Trotsky Terence follow-through. This horrendous evacuation may have helped me forget I’d not shaved. 
The medicationalisationing went tremendously well! Getting the PPs on was not so easy. With the assistance of the small pick-upper I keep in the wet room and sticking my butt in the corner near the door for support, I was pleased with how I got the right leg in the pants so comfortably.
I had to lift my left leg with my left arm to get it high enough to go into the leg hole of the pants, keeping the pick-upper in the same hand to pull at the pants to get my foot in. One second, I was struggling to keep my balance. The next second, I clumped down onto the floor on my knees. This upset,  , , and in both knees, they let me know their discomfort in the usual fashion. Arrgh! didn’t seem too bothered by my tumble. This shows he’s healing up a bit.
Even crawling on all fours to the recliner to regain my feet was almost tolerable pain-wise. It took great effort to clamber up on the £300 second-hand shop-purchased, c1966, welt-causing, uncomfortable, not-working, itch-inspirational, crumb-containing recliner. I stayed there for a minute or two. As I grabbed , I’d left in the wet room and rose gingerly from the chair. Carer Christopher arrived. He seemed in a light mood, bless him. He got the one diabetic sock on and medicated me fully.
I decided a brew of Thompson’s Punjana was in order. I limped, with surprisingly little pain, to the kitchenette. I took this Kodak Tim of the grim view on offer. I think the sun will struggle to get through today. As usual, my eyes were much better in the morning than in the afternoon. So I made a mug of tea and pressed on with yesterday’s blog while I could see well enough. By 10:30hrs, the double shadows started to kick in. Krunglebumps! But I did get the blog finished and posted.

FLAT FIRE ALARM: I forgot to mention in yesterday’s blog that the Fire Alarm went off. This was the first time it had activated since they installed the new, louder one, and I did not hear the old one when it was activated. I had a hobble around to check things in the other rooms, but all looked well. I imagine it must have been a test. Because no brigade or staff members had arrived to check things out. They may have changed the day of the tests. When I could get about, any changes used to be amended on the notice board in the foyer.

The new nightshirt was delivered. I got it hung up to get into later when I’d shaved. Carer Kara visited me. She opened yesterday’s mail, both letters were from the bank. Nowt to fret over, she said. She asked how I was feeling and checked the catheter bag. Kara kindly took the laundry bag down with her.

I returned to the wet room, determined not to have any more tumbles, to get the shave I forgot about earlier done. I had a Porcelain Throne Mark2 visit. No chinks this time, straight to the slushiness if a regular heavily Trotsky Terence commanded evacuation.
Well, at least I get diverse, multifaceted, distinct evacuations. Hehe!
Then, I tackled the shaving. There was just one tiny cut, nothing to bother about. It took me much longer than planned because I couldn’t find my spectacles after getting on the new nightshirt. (I found them later)

My eyes are fading now. I’ll make a meal while I can do it a little more safely before the eyes get worse. 

It’s not a bad effort visually. But the beef and I found both bits of it between the grizzled and fat, was disappointing, as was the so-called gravy. So much for ready-made meals! 
Thankfully, the potatoes that I baked to accompany it were superb. They were seasoned with black pepper and some of the adorable No-butter butter, but even this did not fill me.
So I backed up the sad-tasting but good-looking meal by delving into my favourite biscuit box! Vegan cookies and Lemon Tartlets. They were nice!

Carer Christopher arrived. He took off my one diabetic sock. Dealt out the medications, and then I asked him to take a photo of me in the new nightshirt.
Chris took a few snaps, this one on the right being a first in many ways.
â‘  The first shot of me wearing the new nightshirt. â‘¡ The first picture I’ve ever looked at and expounded a loud exclamation; “Arghhh, look at the size of that belly!” â‘¢ And most uniquely, this is the only time anyone has caught me having two of my shakes on camera simultaneously. Bearing in mind that they are rare and usually do not last for more than a minute makes this all the more remarkable. I ought to be in the medical Gazette! Hehe!

I can hardly recall the details of Carer Chris’s last call. He woke me up but was in no mood to be activated. As for her leader, she never stops her bemusing, irritating meddling with the synapses and memory cells. is to blame overall, I think. But I could be wrong, of course. Perhaps failing was involved in the brain invaders’ plot to send me into another world of confusion. For all I know… which is more guesses than estimates.

May Peace & Contentment surround you

TTFN.

Incidental Inchy: Wednesday 10th July 2024

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At 03:30 hrs, an electric shock woke me. I did notice as I lay there thinking of getting up, or at least the possibility of this, that the nocturnal catheter back had next to nothing in it. Then nodded off again. I stirred again back into mock-life around 05:00 hrs and was glad I did. The memory box had sent me a message that ‘we’ must get the ablutions done before anyone arrives. Not that I needed this thought prompt; the moment I whiffed my BO was enough to trigger me into frantic action.  
I rolled off the bed, stood leaning on the bed bar, wobbling for a few seconds, and then carried out the catching-my-balance routine. Which took at least three minutes of strenuous exercise. Hehe!
I considered doing a few press-ups, toes and a bit of shadow boxing, but the protection pants had come down and were hanging on the compression bandaging, and that caused me to forget about the physical jerks. It was true about the pants, though. Tsk!

I got a dressing gown on, and the innards instructed me to go to the Porcelain Throne. So, I did. The evacuation was a half & half-style. It took a lot of effort to get anything moving. And not a little pain. I was convinced that Constipation Conrad was back in charge of the action. Thinking that this would take some time, I got the crossword book and started having a go at it. I was doing well, as well. Then came the rapid splurge of liquid evacuating; it was all over in seconds. Unfortunately, the mess it sprayed all over took me ages to clean up. There’s always summat goes wrong! And I’d only been up for 10 or thereabouts minutes! Then the morning ablutioning and medications were started.

I got the too-large PPs off and cleaned my lower regions first. Medicated poor old , and Germoloided the piles. Washed my torso; it’s not easy for me, you know! All that blubber around the middle and the getting gigantic man breasts, a hell of a painful job getting to things. Applied the barrier cream around my goolies, under my man breasts and armpits. Cleaned what few teeth I could find left in the mouth. And started shaving. Astoundingly… I thought I’d not have a single nick shaving. , but I should have known better than getting cocky. As I applied the Brut aftershave to my face and body and sprayed the gargantuan mass around my bones and belly, I caught my , knocking it over. I hit my head as I bent down on the sink and simultaneously stubbed my toe as I began to get up from lifting Mickey.
Of course, this didn’t bother me in the slightest.

I got on the computer and am new to this site. Carer Evelyn arrived. She issued the prescription medications, and Evelyn swapped the diabetic socks for me. I asked her to take the laundry down for me. Nice gal. But after she’d gone, the laundry bag was still there. Not to fret, she said she was doing the next call as well, as long as I remember to ask her again.

Onto yesterday’s blog catching-up. It was slow-going as the eyes began to play up with the double and treble visions again. It looks like the sun may come out later.

Carer Kara came to do the financials for me. She went through my emails and opened the letters I could not read. Things seemed okayish. She then kindly told me that the doctor’s surgery had rang her back about the problems with my eyes. I have to have my eyes tested first with an optician. Then, get a report on them from the surgery. Then, the doctor might refer me to the EENT for another operation on the Cataract and Glaucoma… or at least get me on the list for them. I waited 2 years for the last operation that didn’t work. My eyes are worse than they were before the procedure. Humph! 
Kara then called an optician who does home calls. The lady she spoke to said the home eye test would cost me £90. 
They will call Kara back after giving us a temporary date without a time of day for the visit and determining whether they can fill it. Kara put the date on the Google calendar for me. July 2nd. Carer Kara is as good as gold. 
I’m not chuffed with it, but it has got to be done.

Carer Evelyn, the washing has still not been taken. At the bin bag, oh, Carer took that, I think.

But make a meal, I’m really not feeling good.
TTFN!
Morning, I’m back.
The Caregiver called but still did not know where to take my laundry; the bag remains awaiting collection. I was in the right state when she arrived, so tired and exhausted.
I sorted out and ate the meal and settled in to watch the England Euro game. I fell asleep and missed most of it. Huh!

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Food Rating: 9/10!

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Ode From Fellow Blogger & Poet Paul.

Down Nottingham, there’s an odist called Gerald.
Whose smithing of words keeps us levelled.
He’s housebound but not gagged.
By his words bad leaders are scragged.
All of these make him our prophet and herald.

Paul wrote this in a comment. Nice!
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TTFNski, each!

Inchoated Inchy: Tuesday 9th July 2024

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I wish I could have found a turn-off button to the brain today.
Because it was of little use to me. And as for talking to myself out loud and swearingly, it went on and on, with no solutions, ideas, or hopes being created. By the time it came to Wednesday morning, all I’d done on this blog was the top section of graphics! And didn’t start this paragraph until nine o’clock! So this one will be sparser than usual, sorry. 
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Not a good start!

I never considered washing and shaving until I smelt my B.O. as I got my head down 14 hours later! I did visit the Porcelain Throne with the intention of doing the ablutions after the evacuation, but as I sat there emptying the liquid product from my innards, I realised that the nurse was coming today to redo the ankle ulcer bandaging. I thought, well, I’ll do it later… but ashamedly, it wasn’t done at all!

The morning rain rained down.
I did notice it didn’t rain up (Hehe!).

This is the second brew of the day, which should mean the last brew, as I’m restricted to only two mugs daily. I consumed it as I worked hard, confused about what I was doing and possibly making more errors than ever before.
On the bright side, was so kind to me. I don’t think I had more than ten shocks all day!

The precipitation persisted for a while longer.

The Community Nurse Arrives.
This always cheers me up!
She set about getting the swathes of bandaged off of the right leg for me. The punctured ulcer was looking and feeling much better this time. And no sooner had she let the air in; an irresistible urge to scratch at the wound tempted me so much to chafe at it. Hehe!  So, I think it might be getting better now. We, well, I, spoke of the eye problems. The nurse said I should get the Caregiver to call the Doctor for me. Carer Kara did it yesterday, but I’m unsure if she did it in my state now.  Maybe she did later when she arrived today? I’m getting confused. Well, I fancy that; I’m getting confused! Har-Har!

The rain was getting lighter.

I got a letter informing me that I will be made an appointment at the Highbury Hospital shortly, and they will let me know later by post. The photo above was taken on my last visit.

Only the odd droplet of rain falling now. I went on the balcony and took a Kodak Tim from the end car park, where the mud-slide was. Plenty of it, too.

Then, as the eyes faded, I gave up on the computer and prepared the day’s meal. I made some roast spuds in the oven and added them to the sweet and sour ready-made meal I cooked in the microwave.
I’m sorry I bothered with it, now! It tasted just plain overly sweet; what happened to the sour bit of the contents? I’ll not be bothering with one of these again, Mr Asda!

Went to do the washing up, , I again the server trolley wheel. To a certain degree, I swore, rather viciously, washed the things up and took this photograph from the kitchen window. I love it when a snap comes out okay.

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What for you is happiness?
Not being loveless?
What are your favourite meal appetisers?
Mini Steak & Blue Cheese Pizzas?
Maybe tasty Stuffed dates with Ricottas?
Or, like me, cheesy baked potatoes?

Whatever – I’d love you to find that bliss!

TTFNski, Each!

Incessant Inchy: Monday 8th July 2024

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(Starting this blog, Tuesday Morning) 
The day of the one-eyed Inchy! Actually, Tuesday was as well. All day long, things were out of sync. My eyesight and hearing were not good, and I could not hear the intercom, door chime, or fire alarm activation. Cartilages Chloe and Carole were having a ball, freely issuing me pain at a whim. Both gave way a few times, but not at the wrong time, so no crumbling to the floor. Haha!
(I imagine they would have been disappointed in this). 

And must have thought they deserved to win the prize for the ‘Bestest-Inchy-Brain-Interferers’ of the day. But that dubious honour was granted to , with a mention in despatches for & . The ankle ulcers  and   were both much kinder to me today.
I’m really not sure if I was having , , repeatedly falling asleep, or a combination of the three. But little got done that I set out to do. I felt so lacklustre.
Memory promoting from photos from here on.
The urine colour was not too bad later on.

Off to the . Messy!
The Asda order arrived. I handed some boxes and bags to the deliveryman, who kindly filled them for me
at the door.
Then I carted them to the kitchenette, putting the things away in storage, the freezer, the fridge, the cupboards, the floor, and the junk room.
I took some Kodak Tim photographs along the way. This selection had a bottle of disinfectant (Lemon), bleach, and washing-up liquid.
Here, I have a Milk Roll, sliced bread, kitchen towels, bicarbonate of soda, soda water, and some of the economy kitchen towels, which I use to clean my spectacles, hearing aids, and cough into. Thick-skinned red potatoes are used to make baked spuds. Small fresh tomatoes and quick to cook potato cakes. A ready-made feast of cooked meals. Lamb Hotpot, Jamaican patties, Cumberland pie, and a sweet & sour battered balls meal.
I’m not going to starve! Hehehe! 
I must have ordered the wrong milk. It’s rare for me to get something wrong with food orders; this hardly ever happens. Ahem! Later, I tried this organic whole fresh milk. It was nothing special, but it was perfectly edible. My buying it again is not liable.
There was still room free in the fridge after packing everything into it.
Made a diversion to the wet room. For another of the visits. This time,  in control, but only just this time. I sensed a possible resurgence underway from . After noting the lack of any post-evacuation rumbling and grumbling from the innards, I made this decision. 

A series of mini s, all through the afternoon, broke my already fragile concentration.

The drizzle stopped and the grey skies turned a lovely blue hue. Unfortunately, the blotches were still on the Kodak Tim snaps. Humph!
It looked to me, as the right ankle ulcer covered with the compression wrapping was doing better. That was because the wanting to scratch at the itching had returned. On the other foot, it looked like that ulcer was brewing up to do a bursting out. I can’t win. I dread the thought of having to walk with both ankles erupting and both Cartilages giving me grief. I’ll never be able to get to the surgery, clinic or hospital. Thinking this gave me a dread of having to use a wheelchair. Please, I hope not!

I took this evening’s snap from the kitchen window and then worked out my plans for the daily meal. The ready-made meal with the shortest sell-by date was the Lamb Hotpot.
I got some frozen potato chunks cooking in the oven. I checked the timing for the hotpot, and it was six minutes in the microwave. I got some lamb gravy ready to mix. Then retired to the itch-creating, bruise-giving, catheter-tube-tugging, crumb-decorated from my nocturnal nibbling, God-awfully uncomfortable, cringingly grotty, no longer working, dirty beige, anti-sleep designed, c1966, second-hand bought for £300 ten years ago from the charity shop recliner, to watch the end of the ‘Heartbeat’ programme. as the first adverts came on the screen. Waking up in response to a giant whole-body-twitch and jump! I recalled a bit of a dream I had been having. It involved me and Grizelda in mutual contact! So, say no more! Then I smelled the potatoes cooking in the oven…
 I en route to the kitchenette, hit my shoulder on the edge of the door frame when I entered the kitchen. I found that the potatoes needed a little extra time to get them as I like them. Very well singed! 
So I put the meal in the microwave, and as the microwave pinged, I took the potatoes out of the oven. I acquired the standard burnt finger on the oven racking. (I Germolened it.) Then I made some Germolene-flavoured Bisto lamb gravy, adding a drop of Winiary Przyprawa seasoning into the mix.
Then, put the potatoes into the bowl, and poured the gravy over them. Followed by scrapping the lamb hotpot contents out of the tray on top. What an absolute feast of a meal this was! It just may have been the flavour of the Germolene that gave it an extra tang? Hehehe! I had a pot of mandarins in jelly to round off the meal. 
Passed wind, bleached and drifted of into another mind-blank or sleep.
Woke up to find the food tray had fallen, leaving crumbs and gravy all over my new nightshirt, my legs, bandages and the carpet. I had to change my attire.
Carer Chris arrived and laughed when he saw the T-shirt that Sister Jane bought me a few years ago. He took a Kodak Tim snap of it and then of the sun setting from the balcony windows.
It was so sad to see so many new blotches in the Horizon pictures, sob! 

It was good of Chris to take the piccies for me, all the same.

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May your plans not get stunted,
Nor your valuables get hunted,
May your problems be ameliorated,
Your hopes do not get frustrated.
That your sanity can be corroborated,
Your computer doesn’t get corrupted,
And your dreams will not be interrupted!
May good fortune be indicated!
May your problems be quadrated!

Please haveth a great day!

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Incarcerated Inchy: Saturday 6th July 2024

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Sorry, it’s not a good one (blog) from here on.
The England match, Seizures with the shock of them winning on penalties, the tumble, and much-needed sleep overtook me.
Highlights here and there, but little written content.
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Very dark.

Unknown why I took this. I can’t recall taking it.

Morning.

Taken seconds before the tumble.
Struggled to get the slippers on. You can see the loose carpet I slipped on seconds later between the slippers.

Waste sorted.

Bootiful!

Food delivery.
4 Frazzles were ordered and charged for, and 2 arrived.

Football Match. Seizure. 

Taken to the right.
Taken to the left, both from the kitchen.

Still kaki, almost cube-shaped.
Had to patch up the compression dressing, then do the usual medicationings, olive oiled the wears, and Germoloided the haemorrhoids. Acne and Barrier creams were applied.
Had a struggle to get the PPs on today.
And getting the Phorpain Gel on;
MedPhorpainIt was as painful as it had ever been.
Talk about making myself jump, which, of course, got the Cartilages playing up. With the compression tackle on the right leg, I can no longer use Phorpain to ease the agony. Hehehe! 
So, more painkillers were taken. At least getting dressed was not so bad; it was just the long pullover nightshirt.

The carer arrived and got the one odd bamboo diabetic sock and slippers on for me.

Fantastic sun rays are coming through the cloud to the right of the balcony. Had the alien invasion started? Hahaha!

Lamburgers with sliced tomatoes in sourdough rolls, & a can of carrots & peas were cooked and served up. A pot of mandarin segments in orange jelly was the day’s dessert.

What a great hue later on!
A Pareidoliaising Delight!
Heads, eyes, animals, Great!

Here’s the brolly revealed that I could not find!

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May your foibles ferment with festivities!

Incapacity Inchy: Friday 5th July 2024

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From here on, this blog will be sparse… very much so. For my eyesight and memory seemed to go off so much earlier today. Having less than 2 hours of sleep did not help. Finding no logical reason for this irked me a smidgeon. I slowly got a lot more tired earlier today. Then, the double vision started. Shame really. But the nurse came and rebandaged the leg and ankle. The wound on spouted out with a flourish of thick, deep red fluids when the nurse took off the sealing pad. She was not pleased with that. She noticed the bruise on my chin, and I explained my Non-Epilectic Seizure and told her how I could not recall going into the wetroom and did not even know I’d taken a tumble or if I’d passed out or not. I just came around mangled in the shower chair with a bleeding gum, broken tooth, sore chin and a headache. She said for me to ring my doctor and her. I’ve gone out of sync again. 


I did not put the night pouch on last night, so heap-geep-coloured urine was in the nearly full-day day pouch.

My eyesight seemed pretty decent when I started writing the blog. But it faded quicker than usual.

Carer Maryham arrived, concerned about my looking so pale, and asked about the scar on my chin. I told her what had happened in my usual wit-interposed way. I got a good laugh back, which was my design. Hehehe! Maryham was concerned for me. Which was nice.


I watched a bit of TV for a while, including election results.


The trip to the wet room was a painful one. I thought yesterday’s was, but this was even worse.

!!!
The computer froze.

Then I got a message telling me things were being auto-mended. It was at it for two hours. I feared this was the end!

The District Nurse arrived. I was unhappy with the ulcer wound’s not healing at all. She also asked about the bruise on my chin, and I launched into a humorous explanation: ‘Ring your doctor!’

The computer was turned off because everything had frozen again. I was at a low ebb now.

Carer Kim came. We went through the same process, but I got a more significant response this time. Kim laughed so much.
‘Ring your doctor!’

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Amazing clouds as I made a brew of tea.
Then, the eyes finally got too bad, and I was about to pack up and restart in the morning, and Carer Chris came.
He medicated me and had to nip off. He was busy but looked so tired. Bless him.
I got some potatoes in the oven and then closed down the computer. Boy, was I tired!
For some reason, as I was cooking, my mind went back to Rationing. Many years ago, when I was on a fishing holiday with Bill, Malcolm and Jock, we had just arrived at Lockerbie in Scotland. I was backing the van into the car park, and Bill, a butcher, said out of the blue, “I wish they would bring rationing back; I made a fortune with all the fiddles…” It’s funny how I can recall this clearly, but I’d forgotten what I had planned earlier to have for my meal tonight. I think it was lamb burgers, but I found a short-dated vegan pie and had that.
I forgot to add the garden peas. The potatoes were grand, but the vegan pie was not so good, although the gravy was absolutely delicious!

Cleaned the pots and back to the £300 second-hand shop bought, c1966 made. Moth-eaten, bedraggled, grotty, cringingly-beige-coloured, much-dilapidated, crumb-containing from my nocturnal nibblings, bug-ridden, itch-inspiring, not working recliner. And spotted the scene outside of the sunset.
I thought I’d nip onto the balcony and take a Kodak Tim of it, which I did. Lens blotches included.

It was well past midnight before he let me into his world, a world that I was forced torn from by one of the longest-ever leg climbing I’ve had since they started three months or so ago. After which the ulcer emitted short, sharp, shocks, every ten-minutes it felt like, for the rest of the night.
had returned with a certain degree of nastiness and persistence.


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Have a good day, Tatty Bye!

Had Enough Inchy: Sunday 30th June 2024

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The ailments were all in good form, working hard to hurt me in Lucifer’s name again. However, I’m not complaining about; up until now, she has only shocked me about eight times since I rose from my sleeping position(about 12 hours ago). Note that I say sleeping position, not from sleeping. Because when I was on the hospital bed supplied so kindly for me, I think she tired herself out with repeated zapping. Huh, I’m typing this, and she’s kicking off again!.
Has only had one shaking spell, which lasted for around two minutes. Hang on, I’m waiting to see if she starts again. No, it’s all quiet with Shirley’s Shoulder. Good! Of course, there’s always something else to keep me nervous and grumbling. Three hours ago, I’d just put the kettle on, and as I went to the fridge to get the milk and opened the door, gave way. I grabbed the window ledge to avoid hitting the deck. My hand slipped off the ledge, and as I went down, I headbutted the clock. It no longer works. The bruise is disappointingly faint and small, so no sympathy-seeking success is achieved. It did raise a laugh from the weekend Carer, though. Still, I took a Kodak Tim selfie; it might get some sympathy from… Nae, no, it won’t! Hehe!

Carer first call, we managed a laugh and a quick natter

Here are the pictures.
A brighter-looking catheter bag first thing.

There is no sunshine at mid-morning; it seems to be getting darker already. Does this have anything to do with tonight’s England match against Slovakia?
I’m typing this as the match is on. England’s performance in this half was dismal. The ref booked three England players in the first half. The Slovaks scored early on. The second half had just started. A goal was disallowed for England, and another English player was booked, but the ref finally booked an opposition player. Dirty tackles got away with, and the referee likely got a good backhander out of this. Captain Kane just missed a sitter! I think they plating better after the substitution. 
Another goal opportunity missed by England hit the post.
England doing better now. More Slovak substitutions.
England substitution, Toney comes on. Bellingham Scores For England with an overhead kick. What a goal! 1-1 now! Right at the end of the game, while they were in injury time!
So, 30 minutes of extra time are coming now! I’m trying not to get excited. Hope is swelling in my stomach after the earlier England match results, but I do not have faith. 

I can’t stop to make a meal now. I nipped into the kitchen to prepare lamb burgers and potato chunks that would cook in half an hour. I put them in the oven. I hastily returned to the TV and computer and found I’d missed a second England goal! A Kane header.
2nd half of extra time, Slovakia playing well again, threatening, winning more balls, and scaring me.
The Slovak players are booked. They are dirty tacklers, and I’m surprised at the degree of leniency. Or am I? Slovacs is still on the attack. They get a free kick from their friendly referee. Slovakia gets another free kick. They are pressing hard; I’m unsure if England has been in the opposition half yet. Another Slovak is booked. This is tense stuff! Slovak corner. Hit the post. England is under pressure. Another Slovak attack. England breaks, a damp squib! Save by England’s goalie.
The Whistle! England Win! But what a struggle to get through.

The weekend Carers 2nd call arrived. Nibbles and drinkie.
He is on his way home now.

Rescued by Carer Chris photo.
I do no know which day this was made, but I wish I had some spuds to reproduce it.

I’m still working on the blog, but it’s slow work, and my eyes are getting blurry and I’m having double vision again.

I’ll have to pack in blogging soon, with the state of my vision.

Looking bleak early on in the day?

I went to check the food in the oven. It’s still dark out there. The food is not ready because I put it on too low a heat. I’ll get summat to eat in a bit.

Lamb burgers and potatoes well burnt!
But that’s how I like them! Hehe!.

After the meal, I put the pots in the sink to soak and went back to the TV to watch a film. Zzz!
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TTFNski, each!

Imp Inchy: Wednesday 26th June 2024

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I jerked awake and spotted the Gh, so colourful dollop of urine in the catheter this morning!
I got the night pouch disconnected from day one.
I pulled the soft plastic drainer tube off at the same time. Tsk! I didn’t realise this initially because I needed to visit the Porcelain Throne urgently!

I hobbled to the wet room, which took me longer than I thought. The ankle lesions and ulcers were giving me some grief, accompanied by regular electric shocks up the leg. Cartilage Chloe gave way a couple of times when I started limping, but she didn’t have me over this time. I knew this was going to be a painful day.
I swear it was slower and more painful than yesterday’s double torpedo evacuation was. A deeper shade poo in the basin, when flushed, stubbornly refused to go down to the sewer. Luckily, with my record of going between Constipation Conrad and Trotsky Terence so often, I keep some bamboo sticks to break it up in the wetroom, along with the speed-mop had it been Trotsys Terence’s turn, to tackle the excrement problems. It worked a treat; with a second twist of the handle and a loud regurgitating noise, it disappeared. Gorrit!

The Asda delivery arrived.
A pleasant driver put the food into my bags for me. That was a kind gesture, and I appreciated it very much
. Thank you, driver! Four items were unavailable, and two had increased in price.
I started sorting out the products. My gorgeous lemon tartlets, bicarbonate of soda, milk, and Milk Roll sliced bread.
Lemon mousse, lemon yoghourts, No-Butter Butter (I think this tastes so delicious), meat pies, Lamb Patties (Carer Chris loves these), and Mūllers Lemon & Cream desserts.
Lamb-burgers (Richard likes these). And some potato chunks.
There was room for more after getting the fresh stuff in the fridge! Rare, that is.

I put some drinks in the fridge so the Carers and nurses can have a cold in this warm weather. I sorted the waste bags into one and placed them near the front door.

Carer Richard arrived.
Telling me off for calling Putin. Pointing out the things the West have done over the years. Hehehe! After he’d gone, I got on the computer and soon felt a warm, wet liquid running into my slippers.
The plaster the nurse put on yesterday was leaking bodily fluids. The burn and ulcer were leaking again. Humph!
I dried it as much as I could. It was difficult bending down so far, and Dizzy Dennis paid a visit. I cut some bandages from the roll, hoping to seal the leak, and thought I’d put them over the sterile pad. Of course, I used tape to hold them in place.
After ten minutes on the computer, the whole thing fell off the ankle and leg! I just put more tape on it, but it didn’t help. Still, a nurse is coming back on Friday. 

Carer Kara called next, with Trainee Carer Sham. It was the Financial call she was making at the same time. She gave me medications and applied cream under my arms and man breasts. Haha! Kara also saved the day over the lost catheter tube end. She took one off of the spare too-long day catheter and put it on to this day catheter. Then, Kara helped me with the three problems I’d been whittling over with messages and emails. I couldn’t follow what she was doing, but it only took ten minutes from start to finish; three worries were solved. Greattt! 

I’d better get some nosh made, then. I’ll take a Kodak Tim shot of the view first. Then, I can concentrate on the cooking and not burn myself. Maybe…

Two baked potatoes were halved with added non-butter butter, black pepper, and sea salt. Milk Roll sliced bread, sufficient to use one for each vegetarian sausage, to be wrapped in and dunked in the tomato sauce with pickle, pot. (Am I making you puke or hungry?) A pot of lemon mousse to follow. I even considered having some salt & vinegar crisps afterwards, but of course, my dedication to the doctor’s list of what to not eat is, as you know, sacrosanct to me, so I didn’t have any . Well… I only had one tub. (Ahem!)

After washing the pots, I swiftly hit the sack and drifted off into what I thought was a deep sleep. When Carer Israel woke me up, I knew it had to be a deep sleep because I hadn’t been woken by the door chime. And was only half aware of events or happenings. I recall feeling guilty and telling Israel to pick a nibble and drinkie as he left.

Zzzz! Back into the land of nod within seconds of Israel leaving. But it was not the deep sleep I love so much but rarely get; it was back to shooting awake every few minutes, reminded of my failings, ailments, Whoopsiedangleplops, mistakes, errors, and so on that I’ve done over so many years by . He was so persistent and almost nasty with it that I got up and meandered around the flat, half-asleep. But discovered in the morning that I’d taken these Kodak Tims. Although they seem a little light, I presume I may have taken them earlier in the day. 
His disturbing fault-finding onslaught continued within minutes of my getting back to sleep.
But, of course, it wasn’t Steve at all. It was mind-immigrants and an extension of their mind-control techniques, which I assume indicates that I was doing it all the time. I didn’t realise I could be so cruel to myself. I am not to others.

I only got two.
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May any darknesses you have turn to heliotrope!

Impecunious Inchy: Tuesday 25th June 2024

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Sleep was initially no problem last night… Now, staying asleep was a horse of a different colour! I lost count of the times I detonated and burst into wakefulness! Although it was the most prolonged overnight period of skip that I’d had for a long time, I reckon actual sleeping amounted to a couple of hours at most. It was not a good start to the day; again, it worsened.
Humph!
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0545 hrs: I stirred, realising I was not lying in bed (I can be quick sometimes, Hehe!).. It only brought back last night’s farcical, demented, horrible series of calamities and Whoopsiedangleploppery to mind.
I offered up a quick prayer for things to get better today. The plea was not directed at any God, Devil, Witch, Oligarch, Compassionate alien, Sorcerer, Wizard, Soothsayer, or medical practitioner who could help me.

THE WET ROOM FARCE: There was not much hope or effort put into the plead for help, but it was something to do while I was sitting on the Porcelain Throne, awaiting Constipation Conrad to release the first of the morning’s two torpedoes. He fooled me completely this time. The first grindingly slow concrete submarine edged its way painfully out and plonked, with a clunk, into the WC waters. Relief flooded over me! A smile was almost coming over my face in thanks for completing the task at last and me getting rid of the associated pains!
However, a second missile assault developed that almost shot itself out of my rear end. It was quick, but I wasn’t prepared for the extra shot of pain it brought on. Tears developed. True!
When I saw the blood everywhere, I grabbed onto  and I stood up. It was almost a major operation getting everything cleaned up and medicated!
Both cartilages, the ankle ulcer and even Arthur Itis, kicked off simultaneously.
This made me nervous. I was in the wet room, so I decided to get the ablutions done immediately. One cut shaving, no shower, and teggies were done. Next, medicating various parts was needed, which went reasonably well. Even the shaving cut was soon stopped.
Then, the real challenge: getting into the Protection pants!
It was easier to lift my right foot through the leg hole. It hurt, but I laughed it off, knowing the left one would be the most painful. I was right, too. But I didn’t think I was going to take a tumble
. I was wrong on that, too! I tried resting the bum in the corner behind the door. This usually helps. (I was wrong about it this time), I used Picker-Upperer-Petal to move the PPs out so I could lift the left foot with the right hand to get it in the pants left hole… are you following this? Hehe!
During this, I noticed that the urine flowing from the Bladder to the Pouch looked awfully red. That was my mistake, taking my mind off of the challenge. I can’t explain how I managed to take the tumble, landing against the shower chair. I limped to the recliner on all fours, making the ulcer leak more and hurting the ingrowing toenails and cartilage. Chloe and Carole protested the only way they knew how to… giving me such pain that only agony would fit it.
Getting back on my feet was probably more painful than all the other incidents. Yes, it was!
I painfully put on the dressing gown and slippers. I was pondering whether I should have a brew of tea or not when ‘Oh Susan’ chimed from the door chime.
Carer Richard arrived. He didn’t particularly like the state of  Leg-Ulcer-Ulrich or the red and, as he put it, under the man- breasts. Hahaha! He told me not to wear a dressing gown, so I wore a tee shirt. It’s not the prettiest view for anyone calling on me. Bearing the catheter’s paraphernalia. He asked if I had any pyjama bottoms to put on. I was surprised he’d forgotten I can’t get trousers, socks or shoes on or off without help nowadays. He left a note on the whiteboard for someone to call the Doctor and District Nurses about the ulcer and ankle blotches later.

came with a new Carer, Sash, I think her name was. No, it was Sham. Kara was training up the new gal. She checked the catheter and called the Doctors about the red patches underarm and, as Richard said, Men-Boobs. Hahaha! She said I am to keep on with the Terbinafine cream for the arms and titties. Then she looked at the leg swelling, ulcers, and new growths. Then she called the District Nurse’s place. They will be sending a Community Nurse to look at them later on. 

A few PN electric shocks joined the ulcers and swellings, bothering me.
It’s an excellent job that the Cartilages have both calmed down somewhat. I may well regret saying that, of course.

Carer Christopher arrived. He gave me some Peptac and a painkiller and looked at the state of the legs with the dressing now on the ulcer. And got carried away with Kodak Timing them all.

Chris noted that new growth was coming up in the left leg.

Then, that the padded plaster was not sealed and was leaking fluids. He soon put that right for me as well. I think he just enjoyed giving me pain, Hehe! 

Were increasing in frequency now.
Chris put some ointment on the Man-Breasts and underneath each of my arms. He’s a good lad! And he likes his treats, too. I gave him his choice of a cold drinkie from the fridge, and his pockets secured some nibbles.

I’d better get some food sorted before the England match on TV. I’ll be back later, probably in the morning.

Good Morning! I got it wrong again. The England match is tomorrow (tonight). But no! A double cock-up from Inchie! I got the dates wrong again. And the Doctor told me my getting Arithmaphobia is not the end of the world! England’s match was on, and apart from not realising it, I also slept through and missed the other matches! Grumph! Grump! Gragnagles!

MEAL COCK-UP! I thought I ought to have some of the Air Fry crinkle chips I ordered in error months ago to make room in the freezer. So I did. I threw the rest of them away afterwards. Amazingly, some tasted okay, and others were too hard to cope with my lack of teeth. 
Then it dawned on me… I’d cooked them in the oven! It could happen to anyone, of course. But the odds of it being me must be very short!

I took this evening’s view, complete with blotches. Slightly miffed with myself.

I nodded off into sweet, Thought-Storming-free, precious oblivion. Although  were not letting up, particularly the right ankle with the burst ulcer on it, Carer Chris did the last call. Chris seemed keen to get home, bless him, and not to disturb me too much. So he sorted me out in the darkness and put some tape on the wadding on the ulcer that had already come off and leaked the fluid all over my foot during the kip.

I found it in two seconds!

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TTFNski, Folks!

Inchy: Sun 23 June 2024 A hazy start, & agonising end to the day! Not that the middle was owt to shout about!

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I have never faced such difficulties in finding words to start an introduction for the blog before. In a way, I’ve been acting like Jeckle & Hyde and Steptoe & Son, struggling to communicate with myself. My moods were ever-changing, going into reverse modes and back again into sort of semi-contented ones. My fears would rise, and minutes later, nothing mattered. Then, I’d sink back into a self-pity mode again. It has to be a record for me today; I went into so many Mind-Blanks, or maybe they were what the doctor calls them, Non-Epilectic Seizures, I’ve ever had before. Accompanied by Memory blanks, some of them unbelievable, even to me. I had to keep checking what date it was; I forgot if a Carer had been or not. As for where the utilities needed were on CorelDraw, everything was taking me so long and still coming out wrongly. Even doing the graphics for this blog, I saved them all to different folders, and I spent hours trying to trace them, I ended up thinking it would be quicker to do them all again. Which was a big mistake; it wasn’t any quicker at all, the opposite, in fact! Up until around 19:00 hrs, the day seemed to reek of the absurd, bizarre, inexplicable, unexplainable, asinine, and undefinable. When I realised my cock-up with saving the files in the middle of trying to sort them out… CorelDraw Crashed! And all these farces to both legs being so painful, Cartilage Chloe in the left, and the ankle ulcer now pouring out liquid from when I dropped the oven tray on it, this was not a good day. After many trials and tribulations,  I finally got around to doing my ablutions. Apart from not being able to stop the bleeding, shaving cuts (4). After completing the ablutions and medication duties, the only nasty bit was when I was trying to get the Protection Pants on. With both legs in a delicate situation, I lost my balance a few times and acquired some new bruises on the left leg, the cheek, and the right knuckles. But I didn’t go over; I hit the shower chair, door and sink instead.
Now, this does not explain how, but I got the dressing gown on and went back to the computer. I was at the stage of starting to write this intro. My mind was blank for a few minutes. Then it was as if I’d taken a wonder drug, and the mind seemed to clear. This (having read it now) I think it reads spot on as to what happened. Of course, things have been changing all day, so I hope to keep at it before the dark, dank depression develops. And another miracle, as of this time, the double vision had started earlier than this each day for a week or more,  but not today. Not that I’m missing them… this may be a part of my sudden enlivenment? Or not. I do so wish the doctor would read my blog… maybe not, though. She might have me collected by the men in white coats.
The only other thing that got to me was Kodak Tim blanks. I’ll explain this later in the blog. I don’t want to upset myself now I’m feeling better.
Huh, did I speak again! The bloody leg and  have just started! And they are really giving the damaged ulcer what for! Big mouth! Really struggling to walk now, See what I mean? Up& Down!
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05:10hrs: I sprang awake. In need of the Porcelain Throne. Emptied the catheter pouch and off to the wet room. Where was I flabbergasted to see blood in the bag? Seconds later, it soon returned to a normal dark colour. This baffled me. I’ll keep my eye on it. If it happens again, I’ll not mess about this time; I’ll call for an ambulance.
There was no real problem with the evacuation, though. It was normal for Trotsky Terence. He’s back with a vengeance. Cleaning up took a while. Carer Maryham arrived and got me sorted out. Bless her. She was just finishing the extra shift she was called in for. I hope she can get some rest now after helping out. It’s been a blessing this week when she’s called.
I was committed to finishing yesterday’s blog and made an early start. I’ve explained my situation. Things just got more messy as the day went on. Carer Joanne did the midday call. I like her—she’s straight-natured and not pushy. We sure do have some good laughs with language. Hehehe!

It was well into the afternoon before I completed the Saturday blog. I posted it and emailed the links. Took this snap of the view on offer. Kodak worked!
After hours of preparing the graphics for today, I felt a little proud of how well I was doing, but then I found the mess I’d made when saving the files. I’d been working on a caveman graphic and was so glad this one wasn’t lost. I plan to do more on it and make a few changes.
The teatime Caregiver arrived. I don’t know his name unless it was Israel. The eyes were beginning to fade a stage and offer double vision. Ah, yes, it was Israel! He’s grown a moustache! I took a snap of him, and later on, it was on the SD card!
Then I took his BP. Resulting in: SYS 119-DIA 132-Pulse 69-Temp35.5°. A good one.
‘Give Me Sunshine’, and out came the sun!
Kodak Tim seemed to have gotten over his tiff for the moment. However, the snaps still have the blotches.
The sun was very high in the sky. (Where else would you expect to find it? Haha!)

One of the shaving cuts didn’t want to stop bleeding. I dolloped on some more of the Brute aftershave. It stung a bit, but it seems to have stopped now. At least I smelt a bit sweeter afterwards. Hehe!

Carer Richard arrived as I was about to sort the meal out. His back was playing up a bit. I put some drinks in the fridge for him in the morning, which was nice and cool for him.

Preparing the Meal…
I removed the dodgy Asda potato cubes, and got the few left into the oven.
Shelled the pod peas.
I watched some TV, football, I think. Well, it was on when I fell asleep, and another match was on when I woke up.
Luckily, I’d put the oven on too low a heat. So, nothing burnt.
Shortcrust pastry pastie. (Try saying that when you’ve had a few, Hahaha!), fresh pod peas, tomatoes and baked potato
cubes. A Reet Treat!

I got the pots washed, and as I was doing so, I felt a warm, wet sensation in the lower regions; it was Little Inchies Fungal Lesion bleeding. 
I went to the wet room, washed, and applied the Daktarin. While there, I cleansed the skin and applied the new Barrier cream to the ginormously flabby, wobbly belly folds and underneath the armpits.
I then needed to utilise the WC. What a flipping change this time! Trotsky was losing his dominance. It’ll be interesting on the morning visit. I decided against taking any anti-diarrhorea capsules. MedPhorpainBut did give both of the Cartilages and Arthur Itis knees a good rub-in Of the Phorpainâ„¢ Gel. My rear end was blessedly washed and medicated with the soothing Germoloidsâ„¢ ointment.

Back to the computer to save everything to date, then put it in sleep mode.

Before climbing into bed… Yes, it’s not easy, but once in and adjusted, Sweet Morpheus is usually satisfied. The nocturnal catheter pouch was positioned, and then the regular frustrating routine began: Did I turn the taps (faucets) off? And close the fridge door? Turn off the cooker? Close the windows? Leave the lights on? I hate it when this doubting comes! I had no choice but to struggle out of the bed, get upright, carry the night pouch, get the walking stick, and do a mini-tour checking everything was safe and sound.
Then, I struggled again to get into the bed! I reset the nocturnal catheter pouch, and as I settled again, I heard a noise from the kitchen – at least, I think it was from there. It must have been loud, else I would not have heard it!
: I found that the washing-up bowl I dried after using had slipped off of the trolley I’d left it on. Hitting some spring water bottles on the floor, which had rolled around the kitchenette floor, with one of them bursting open! Arghhh!
Naturally, to make more mess, it was only the bottle that was carbonated! 
So, I ended up retrieving the bottles and bowl and mopping the floor while carrying the Nocturnal catheter pouch, and the walking stick,  gave way while I was doing this! My language was extremely volatile. 
It must have taken me two hours to get the kitchen back into a mock-acceptable state. My ingrowing toenails, knees, Harold’s Haemmorhoids, the ankle ulcer, and Little Inchies Fungal Lesion were all hurting.

I did take this Kodak of the night view earlier but forgot to put it on. Sorry about that.

By the time I wearily got back to the bed; then I faced climbing into it again—I was tired out, frustrated, and in a self-hating mode. I decided not to attempt the bed again, and I was convinced something else was going to disturb me, I plopped my rhinoceros-like body into the £300 second-hand shop bought, c1966. moth-eaten, bedraggled, grotty, cringingly-beige-coloured, much-dilapidated, crumb-containing from my nocturnal nibblings, bug-ridden, itch-inspiring, not working recliner. 
I’d left the small picker-upperer on the chair! I don’t need to tell you how painful it was or where it struck. On top of all the other ailments playing up after the workout in the kitchen. Once again, it was back to the medicine cabinet in the wet room. Cleaned the rear end up and applied some Daktacort this time.
Back into the c1966, £300 pound, second-hand charity-shop bought, crumb-containing, odour-retaining, Harold’s Haemorrhoid-testing, nauseatingly beige-coloured, non-working, virus-breeding recliner.
Initially, prevented any thought of getting to sleep. This was probably due to the joy and ebullient nature that must have been in, after her success at making my life hell! Well, as miserable as she can.

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No. What’s different about her bum?
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Hasta la Vista!