Inchcock Today: Rescued Photographs and Diary

RESCUED PHOTOGRAPHICALISATIONS

Ode to the last few days… It’s been a struggle!

Worra job, fighting the SD card reader, t’was pathetic!
Four days of failing, it was terribly acrostic…
Three or six times a day, I tried and was feeling threnetic,
The neighbour was noisy; I resisted any rhetoric,
Cause I could have hit him with my mashie-niblick!
But at least his noise today is only sporadic.

I know that I’m uneducated, got dementia, and am thick…
But repeated failings to get the piccies on… I felt sick…
Got some of them on today, and then I felt fantastic…
But once out of five days? Proves I’m no clever dick…
But my moods are temporary, changing, erratic…
I can be depressed, then minutes later, charismatic?

Sometimes, well, rarely, I can believe I’m being realistic…
But then consider myself unreliable and eccentric…
Other times concentration can be enjoyed, therapeutic…
But it’s only me being toying with hopes, being simplistic.
Hopes for improvement in mental health and lethargic,
Ever new problems with neurotransmitters and neuralgic.

I don’t expect that life’s ailments or mental logic,
A problem is I’m my own worst critic,
To expect to get back to normal is unrealistic…
I anticipate daily pains and struggles… am I masochistic?
That’s not the word I mean; I do feel a dick…
I somehow cope well with pain that’s chronic?

But not with Peripheral Neuropathy, or owt anapeiratic,
I manage with being deaf and arthritic,
Not Doreen Dementia, who denies anything copacetic…
I try not to get depressed or apathetic,
I can often laugh it off, then I find it all too dramatic,
I cannot cope; I find it all too frantic!

Having got rid of the depressive rot, onward…

Not sure what day this blood test was done, but I’ll hazard a guess on Saturday. To think, a couple of days earlier, the SYS was 208! Noe down to the second-lowest ever! Hehe! I’m not complaining, mind you.

And the body temperature, well, another fantastic result. Almost spot on the target figure (NHS) of 35°c!

I can remember taking this temperature, although not the day – because I dropped the thermometer, bent down to retrieve it, and clouted my head against the corner of the chair. And knocked the camera off of the table, and it would not work for a day or so, Tsk!

This I recognise quickly enough, along with the error I made doing it…

I’d made the nosh for Josie, as usual on a Sunday. Got it just right tastewise, and delivered it to her door at the agreed time of midday, feeling rather smug, with her treats for the weekend on the tray. Josie said nothing out of the usual. But I did an odd look from the gal… had I done something wrong? Mmm!

When I got back to my flat to start my dinner, it came to me… It was Saturday! Not Sunday! I felt such a berk!

I got my fodder served up. Vegetable pastie. Green and black grapes, garden peas, baked potatoes, lemon yoghourt. It was lovely. I granted the meal a taste-Rating of 8/10.

I’ve no idea why I took the picture whatsoever? I think it was on Saturday that I was having problems with the computer, other than the usual regular temper and sanity-testing card reader.

This night (Saturday maybe), the sky seemed a smidge misty with it during the sunsetting process.

I stayed up late to catch it and took these two relatively poor photographicalisations from the kitchen windows.

Saturday night, I think, possibly, mayhaps, if not, then Sunday…

I had a bad bleed from Little Inchies Fungal lesion.

Sunday, I think these results are from. And a fine set of figures they were. Sys 144, DIA 54 (A little low, maybe, but no worries about this), the pulse showed 83.

Well, blow me down, another good reading from my Chinese (Hong Kong) made by Shenzhen Relee Electronic & Technology Co. Ltd™, contactless thermometer. Dang, close to perfect for the third day!

Ah, my beloved puffer clouds were up in the sky for me to picture them. I recall taking these pictures and suddenly needing the Porcelain Throne, so off I trotted without any delay…

I was sitting on that plastic seat in there for over 25 minutes! I also took a Codeine afterwards to ease the sore bum from the concrete torpedo; I’d just grindingly released with a Clonk of a noise when it landed in the bowl! Constipation Conrad had won the competition against his competitor Trotsky Terence by several lengths. Still, I got a few clues answered in the crossword book.

Another sort of cloudy, hazy sunset that night. Of course, I have no idea what night it was, Sunday or Monday, I imagine.

Buttered tatties, tomatoes, fish fingers, fishcakes with mushy peas inside, and battered fish fingers, Birds Eye as well, and they were crap tasting! Some grapes, and I see the milk roll slices, which was excellent cause I could mask the cardboard taste of the Birds Eys battered fish fingers a little by the bread. Eurgh! The potatoes were undercooked, but they were cooked bu a grand chap (Me!) Hahaha! Flavour: 5/10.

Tuesday’s nosh, this was more like it. There are tons of garden peas, tomatoes, tattie chunks, yellow and red tomatoes, and two sizeable battered fish portions. This fish in batter tasted a lot better than the last Birds Eye ones.

Unfortunately, the rest of the meal was a disappointment, well, crap again, actually! The bananas had gone oversweet with age, the potatoes tasteless, and the peas were bitter and sour. The tomatoes were fair enough. Flavour: 5.5/10.

Wednesday: The Iceland order arrived. I was unsure what to expect after they sent me the chinks that had gone green last week. The driver took the bags through to the kitchenette for me and got his choice of cans in thanks. Three items were not available, and two substitutions, but at least they had better dates on them this week. I got the bags unloaded, doing the freezer and fridge items first.

Tried some of their veggieburgers and pies this time. Frozen, of course, and had a job to get them into the fridge and freezer. The substituted tomatoes were Italian ones, So maybe a disappointment. We’ll see. They usually are but compared to last week’s Algerian ones…

The substituted Richmond sausages, Carer Richard, can have in the morning.

Well, yet another fine set of results from the Health Checks! Sys 133, Dia 70, Pulse 69 (A smidge low again), Then I got the thermometer out.

Brilliant! Four days now since the 248 SYS reading, Yee-Haa! Anyone’s guess is how long these promising results will go on for.

Gong to get some nosh on now. Hopefully, I can make something worthwhile and tasty this time.

Got the chips in the oven. And noted the popularity of the Chestnut Way end car park – And no red-van-man is on sight. Unless he’s parked elsewhere than his favourite spot on the yellow no parking chevrons?

The evening Carer arrived, Valerie (Nibbles). Sorted the medications and took the bag to the chute on her way out.

Got the burnt chips based nosh finished and served up. Do you know, they tasted super-good and so tasty! At last, a decent rated meal. A burger on a cob, tomatoes, and garden peas. For afters, a mini strawberry cheesecake and a banana. Taste Rating: 9/10!

The Amazon ordered slippers arrived a little late on. Thanked the driver and offered his choice of canned refreshments.

I didn’t open the bag yet, I’ll do that in the morning, but I could tell I was going to be disappointed by the shape of the package. It felt more like a giant teddy bear inside than footwear. Squashed up and no doubt well-misshapen. Hey-Ho!

I was deprived of getting to sleep again, can’t blame the Thought-Storms this time – Thoughts of all kinds and types were absent! I was not depressed, just in a passive, what-the-heck mood. Although hours later, after failing to nod off, the darned Thought-Storms did kick off. The long done and gone mistakes I’d made flourished about in my head, seemingly in amazing chronological order? Around 02:20hrs, I put the TV on, a desperate measure… but it seemed to work… Until I sprang awake at 04:00hrs!

The Nottingham Lad’s True Tales of Woe

Inchcock Today: Diary with Tips in Ode

INCHCOCK TODAY

Morning Thoughts – In Ode

Tips & Advice for Whippersnappers

It’s not always good to be counterrevolutionary,
Or eat too many cakes, biscuits and confectionary,
Even when they are freebies, stolen or complimentary,
You can get CBD from an apothecary, but not for free!
Boots sell sugar-free cakes, chewing gum and toffee!

Don’t skimp on your health, even on dentistry…
It will hurt and cost, don’t be disillusionary…
You can get pain-killers, co-codamol from a dispensary,
You must obtain a job; this is elementary…
To avoid ending up broke and eleemosynary!

Avoid gangs, violence, and drugs, which seem customary…
For youths who end up injured or dead, sanguinarily…
Not that all young men think this is statutory…
Many, well, a few, the odd one, will live crime-free…
Sixty-five per cent or so will go to prison, you see!

This advice-ode is not meant to be a shockumentary,
Its advice is to avoid overuse of your Rosary…
Luckily for you, we have a cost-counting judiciary…
So drug-taking, muggings, don’t mean putting you away,
It costs too much to lock you up for more than a day!

The exception is murdering someone, to prison, you go away,
You’ll not worry about the cost of living, which is so inflationary…
A free Doctor inside, should you go into insanity!
Takes me weeks to get an appointment for the surgery!
A 20-year sentence, even if you’re a murdering mercenary!

You can get by the parole board with lies and trickery,
Being free within 6 years is not so extraordinary,
They’ll pay your rent, you’ll be probationary…
You can kill again, perhaps a mother and baby?
Get out again, sell your story for a documentary?

But let’s not be gloomy; think of the non-offenders,
Who cannot afford to go out on benders…
And don’t attack customers or bartenders,
They may be unemployed, clerks or builders…
Struggling to live and pay their bills, the poor bleeders!

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

Wednesday 6th April 2020

04:00hrs: I stirred to life without any jumping or jerking. Most importantly, mental-healthwise, not a sign of the Thought-Storms! I made my way to the wet room for ablutions and an urgent feeling for a wee-wee.

I took the half-full NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket) with me for emptying, cleaning and disinfecting. Not an easy job, but I’m using Metal Mickey to get there. But no problems were encountered! Tipped out the contents, rinsed and washed the bucket, and put some Dettol disinfectant in it.

I started to get the nasal cleaning done and had to make a slight change of plans…

It was a close call! Despite there being no rumblings or squelching from the innards to warn me, the movement began before I’d got my bottom on the plastic! Messy! Watery, splashed all over me and the WC! Start to a sudden finish in less than 30-seconds, I reckon! The cleaning up afterwards took a lot longer. Tsk!.

Back to the wash and brush up sessioning. The teeth cleaning went okay. Then that danger zone, shaving, was started. I thought it had gone well. But when I was starting on Little Inchie and Harold’s Haemorrhoids, I caught a reflection in the shaving mirror. I wished I’d taken the camera in now. Tiny trickles of blood down from the neck and chin area, onto my chest and man-breasts. Hehehe!

I got the lesion, piles and neck sorted out rather quickly too! It took ages, and I had pieces of paper towel all over me, but they eventually stopped leaking. These tiny shaving cuts don’t seem to respond to the aftershave as much as the larger ones.

I got the day clothes on, and feeling refreshed, I hobbled back to the kitchen to get the kettle on…

Humph! I had to hasten back to the wet room to utilise the Throne again! This evacuation was, what’s the word? A sort of follow-through; far less content and almost entirely liquid. More cleaning up was required.

Whoops Trotsky Terence was now in complete charge of any rear-end passings from the innards. This called for a dose of the Galpharm to be taken with the brew of Glengettie! Which I took the next thing.

Whoops Another flipping wee-wee, short and sharp again. These came all day long, so much so that Little Inchies Fungal Lesion started bleeding later on. I don’t think I’ve wee-weed so much before. Bladder and Bowels have been upset somehow?

☑ I got the Sphygmomanometer out and took the Blood Pressure readings. Sys 144, DIA 71, which was in the High Blood Pressure red, only just. It was lower than it’s been for a few days now.

☑ The body temperature was so close to target again. It has been so good for the last 3-4 days. Why? Not complaining. I just wish I knew what I’d done right, so next time it drops, I can do it again.

I got the Tuesday blog updated and sent it off to WordPress. Emailed the link. Then, I Pinterested some photographs. Just starting the WP comments, and Carer Richard arrived. He was looking a bit better than yesterday. He gave me a few minutes of chinwagging, which I appreciated. Especially as I could see how tired the lad was.

After Richard had departed, I went back to the WP Comments. Next, onto Facebooking. Then…

Whoops Dizzy Dennis arrived, and so much so, my mind got fogged. I worked (I think), on this blog for several hours, having great difficulty getting the photos to upload again.

Whoops Concentrating was hard enough as it was, but the wee-wees increased in frequency in the afternoon, and this really got to me. I was struggling with all the breaks I had to take. Things were taking ages as I had at times to work out where I was before the weeing! Grrr!

I went through to get the oven on in readiness for the meal making, and the view was staggering. I do love those puffer clouds!

Night Carer. Food. Horrible sleep.

Whoops Can’t get photos to load at all.

Fed-Up!

Inchcock Today: Tue/Wed 16/17th February

Wednesday 16th February 2022

The body woke, and immediately appreciated that I can only remember waking up four times! Much better sleep!

The brain failed to fully engage! For I somehow found myself in the spare room sorting out the bag for Independent Living Coordinator, Warden, and desk-top dancer, Obersturmbannfuhreress Deana. Wondering why I’d done this before having a wee-wee or even putting the kettle on to make a brew of tea confused me. (Doreen?)

I had a wee-wee and checked on Little Inches fungal lesion (itching a bit). But it was not bleeding, I just cleaned things up and applied some teeth-grindingly painful ointment to the affected area. Argh!

Thought I was going to make a brew of tea… found myself topping up the Treats-Shelf instead? It was obvious to me, plainly, that Vascular Dementia Doreen was going to be in charge of things today! I could do nothing about choices until things calmed down from her. Which, thank heavens, they did shortly after I’d made a brew of JS Red Label Extra Strong tea. But Doreen’s attentions were mentally crippling at times today. So annoyingly so, as well.

Went to make a brew and took this photo of the dark, dank morning view.

The SYS was not too bad. Pulse at 90, up a bit.

Humph! I did drop the darned BP machine as I was putting it away! Tried it out again, nervous of it being buggered, but it worked okay. Used the Chinese (Hong Kong) made by Shenzhen Relee Electronic & Technology Co. Ltd™, contactless thermometer. The surface temperature read as 34.5°c. A bit higher this time. Good!

I got settled on the computer for a slow, challenging, frustrating session on the Local Snippets blog. Not much went right the first time, and much correctionalisationing was needed. But then again, this is the usual scenario nowadays.

05:45hrs: As I got up to go for a wee-wee, right-loud clunking noises came from the flat above! I think Herbert must have had an Accifauxpa of his own. Didn’t bother me, mind; I was up anyway. I don’t think it was loud enough to be heard by anyone else who might have been trying to sleep. Not that the sanctified, consecrated, uncommunicative, ascetic, aloof, sniffy Herbert would be bothered.

Around 06:00hrs, I spotted the moon through the balcony doors, peeping through the thick clouds. So I searched and found the Canon camera, which I’d left on top of the microwave, and spent some time taking many snaps of the moon. Determined to try and get some decent ones this time.

I think I took about ten photographs of the planet in total, but these four were the only ones that came out fairy acceptablyish. At least, I hope so.

Back to the computer and blogging. However, things WordPress-wise came to an end for a while; why?

Fries salary has since been increased to $23 million!

The landline flashed and rang. It was from Natalie of the Health 7 Social Care team, called Meridian. To explain to me that they (Meridian) had had another no show, and my Carer should arrive by 09:00hrs. Nay fuss! Fair enough, at least they let me know.

When $23m salaried Liberty-Global, number-crunching, mist and mirrors boss Mike Fries, Virgin Media got the connection back, I pressed on making errors after mistakes on the blog. After a couple of hours, the card reader failed to identify the SD card reader… Grumph!

Eventually, my trial and error, or the computer did it on its own, the reader was loaded. I stopped doing the blog, and I caught up with other things. Email reading and replying. WordPress reader, then comments. Then on Facebooking.

Carer Elena arrived and looked after me in a caring and attentive way. (I loved that! Hehehe!) She had been called out to cover for the absentee. Elena Took the waste bags to the shute on her way out for me.

I got the blog done and posted and began the Local Snippets one. However…

.

Gnash! Groggleturds! Gorblimey Crap!

To done-in mentally to do any more blogging now. I got the ablutions tackled. Aye… Worra good session it wor! One little cut shaving, a very minor toe-stubbing, and no falls, walking into anything either! Medicated, refreshed, into the new PPs, night attire donned, and off to get summat to eat.

Deana called on me, and we had a mini-chinwag.

The thud, thudding started from above, so at least I know Herbert hasn’t snuffed it. Shame!

My only success of the day… Cheesy baked potatoes and sausages. Sound like nothing special? But I altered the recipe I usually use to make these treats this time.

  • Take the grated cheese out of the fridge an hour before needed. Best do it after starting the oven going.
  • Clean whole potatoes in a not too hot oven (180°), Part of the secret here, cooked at this lower temperature, but for longer. Top and bottom of oven selected.
  • The cheese, preferably Red Leicester, or any strong cheddar into a large basin. Put the cheese in this, then sprinkle some anchovy or distilled vinegar into the dish.
  • Add a good-sized knob of best butter.
  • After at least an hour and a half (according to the size of the spuds), check to make sure the potatoes are really soft with a semi crispy husk. (If unsure, you can sprinkle water on the spuds as you put them in the oven to cook).
  • Remove the pots when nice and soft inside, and cut them each in half on your chopping board.
  • Remember, once the oven is empty, turn the temperature up to 220°.
  • At this stage, expect burnt fingers, and be prepared to make a mess…
  • Save the skins to one side.
  • Spoon out the flesh into the pre-prepared basin and cheese. (You may need to apply Germolene to your fingers afterwards).
  • Mix well with a fork to start with. Then changes to a spoon. When you are content that you’ve ironed out any lumpy bits…
  • Spray the inner of the half-husks with a bit of vinegar or oil of your choice.
  • Load up the husks with the bashed-up potato-cheese mixture, in fact, overfill them a smidgeon, and press down with a spoon.
  • Then run a fork over the top of spuds so that they will brown off crisply and easily.
  • Get them back into the oven, and expect them, if medium-sized, to take 20 minutes to half an hour. But keep checking cause different varieties take different times to cook and brown off.
  • Traditionally, you can now treat any burns gather the many clumps and splashes of potatoes bits and cheese from the floor, cupboards and your clothing.
  • Once you are happy with the colouring to your taste of burntness of the half-potatoes, all you have to do is remove them and resist eating any before they get onto the plate!
Wunderbar!

Serving Suggestion wot I dun last week

I got settled in the recliner, and blissfully I fell asleep. Ah, nice!

“♫ Oh, Susana… ♫ rang out, and Carer Valerie came in. Couldn’t really have a natter as such cause she was on her mobile most of the time. But she granted me some time eventually. Hehe! Thanked her with some treats, and off she trundled. ♥

No messy tonight. I got the head down after Valerie had departed and remembered to take the Hemp capsule. It was lovely drifting off. I only woke up about for times, marvellous!

=  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =  =

Thursday 17th February 2022

Only a few wakings up during the night. I’m well pleased with that, but, on the fifth…

I more or less sort of bolted into wakefulness. Full of misapprehension, a muddled state of mind, and in desperate need of a wee-wee! Don’t know why I mentioned it now. Although it’s been this way for over a week now…

I worked out who and where I was as I tumbled out of the £300, second-hand, c1968, charity shop-bought, eyesorely-horrendously grungy coloured, haemorrhoid-testing, unfit-for-use, not working, recliner, and had wobbled like Charlie Chaplin to the wet room. I’m not sure why I did not use the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket); it would have been so much quicker?

Despite Bladder-Barry insisting that I needed a wee-wee so badly, things did not flow very easily. I waited patiently and could almost feel the flow coming from the innards… girded my loins as felt it invade Little Inchy… and a pathetic trickle evacuated, that was so painful! Aha, another infection! I wondered if I had any of the tablets left from the last one… but lost my train of thought when an instant need of the Porcelain Throne arrived; at the perfect moment while I stood above it… I thought.

Oh, dear, similar trouble as the wee-weeing? I got sat down, thinking things were going to erupt from the rear-end. I was still there ten minutes later, having a go at the crossword puzzle. Nothing much was moving much at all…

Then, an explosion of gas had burst free! Obviously, I didn’t see it, but I got the feeling that it had caused ripples on the water in the bowl. Instant relief of the pains! Within seconds a mammoth, rock-solid torpedo slowly, very slowly forced its way out, hitting the water before it was entirely out of the bum?

There was no discomfort with it at all? AS I stood up, the stool moved, and splash and clunk were heard… well, I think they did. No mess whatsoever. Mind you, there wouldn’t have room alongside that missile!

Got a good wash and beclothed my body. I went to make a brew of tea. I’m not sure what I did with the camera, but the photo I took of the morning view came out really vivid. I mean, it was around three o’clock in the morning; how did the Canon camera create light when it wasn’t there? Then I remembered dropping the camera last time I used it… argh… I wonder if it’s damaged? I’ll take shots of the Health Checks in a bit, see if the camera is okay this time. Or, did I change some setting when I retrieved the thing from the floor? I’m talking to myself again!

I went to get a duster to clean the computer screen and saw that the moon was appearing through the smallest hole in the dark clouds.

So I skedaddled and got the Canon camera post-haste and back to the kitchenette.

I had to photograph them quickly, cause I could see the clouds enveloping them all the time I was focussing.

One of the pictures came out in a different size to the others? I now have to assume that I broke something in the Canon when I dropped it on my foot yesterday?

Or is it me?

My progress on blogging has never been harder work than it is today. I am so frustrated.

I suppose with getting up early and the kerfuffle with the wee and Throne, added to the semi-confused state of my mind… this must have affected me in some way? Or am I just waffling again?

The care arrived after 07:0ohrs. The new gal, who is so confident. Kiya, I think, or maybe not. She spent a while chatting with me, trying to settle me, I guess. She also recognised I was not like my usual self. Damned good that, after just three visits. ♥

I spent a lot of time doing the header and top graphic. Got them done in CorelDraw and put them onto this blog… Then, realised I’d put the wrong dates on both of them… Gragnangles! It cost me another hour or more to get them amended and reposted!

Aha, I’ve not done the Health Checks yet! So I did them. Started with blood pressure taking. The figures looked okay to me.

Then on the temperature taking. Which was getting higher at last. Apparently, 35°c is my minimum target, they tell me. It’s the closest it’s been for a long time now. Jolly good show, eh?

I found on the SD card a photo I took earlier from the kitchenette window. Forgetting things and getting confused is the mark of the devil; Vascular Dementia Doreen!

Did I mention she’s moved in?.

I just had a visit from Dizzy Dennis. One of the instant jobs. I’m going to get off of blogging now, and get a sit-down, and try to do nowt for a while, Thought Storms permitting.

I made a meal of sorts, potatoes, a small microwave BBQ burger, and a lemon cheesecake. Nowt fancy, but I needed rest and sleep so much by then. Still, I did enjoy it, such as it was. Taste-Rating: 7.5/10.

Washed the fodder things and got down in the £300, c1968 recliner. Mind confused and so tired, and within minutes I was off visiting Sweet Morpheus… and dreaming with it.

Half-an-hour later, ♫ Oh Susana ♫ rang out as the Carer entered the flat. Carer Fria Freestone, at least I think it was. Fria soon got the medications sorted in a matter of fact way; she chose her treat; drink (Tequila) and nibble (Easter egg), and was soon off, bless her.

I checked the flat for anything not safe. Taps etc., and got back down in the recliner. At first, I struggled to get back to sleep, but thoughts of Jillie arose, and I was soon off once more into the land of Nod! Hoping to stay that way for once… I’ll see!

Inchcock Today: Diary wiv odes

Thursday 10th February 2022

Thought I’d Mention It… Great Music!

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

05:10hrs: I just waken up again with a jump. The sixth time tonight, I would have gone back to sleep, but the Thought Storms started off. After a few minutes, they just disappeared while I was right in the middle of a fretting session. The surprise of the Thoughts suddenly stopping made me forget what it was I was worried about. Hahaha!

Then in a heartbeat, the bowels started to evacuate on their own again… Panic, flap, up and nearly toppled over, bruised my leg battling against the recliner arm and leg as I tumbled a smidge, and dashed (yes, really, and wobblingly) to the wet room. Grrreat! I made it in time! But it was another messy affair.

I cleaned up the room myself, got some fresh Protection Pants on, returned to the front room, and took a Galpharm capsule. Which was a bit farcical in two ways… Taking out a tablet and Peripheral Neuropathy-Pete’s nerve ends contacted, I crushed the capsule. Not only that, but the nerve-ends went back to lot contacting, and I had to wait a while before I could open the fingers that half the squashed tablet firmly! Which I have to admit to laughing out loud too! I tested the fingers after they allowed me to open them, all seemed fine again.

Opening the foil again on the strip, and the entire sheet came off! How long it took me to find them all, I’m not sure, but it took a few minutes at least. Another smirk hit my face! Got a capsule swallowed at last.

As had to use the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket) three times in ten minutes. I shall ring Dr Nallamothu, Urinary Tract Infections office in St Annes, later today; I can’t go on like this.

I put the kettle on, sorted the waste bag, and put it near the door, in case this mornings carer takes it to the skip for me. Made a brew and refilled a water bottle for later. Then took this snap of the morning view.

Then tackled the Health Checks. I used the newer Chinese (Hong Kong) made by Shenzhen Relee Electronic & Technology Co. Ltd, contactless thermometer. A little low?

Then got the Sphygmomanometer, manufactured for Boots, by ZDEAC (Zhongshan Daguan Electrical Appliance Company Ltd) in Guangdong, China. The BP was a smidgeon higher. The pulse was 80. good, that was, I think.

The Carer, Richard, arrived a little later than usual. About 07:30hrs. But he seemed a little cheerier today and willing to have a natter with me this morning. He said it was his holiday-vacation starting tomorrow… Aha, that’d be why he was a bit happier today. I’ll miss having him call on me; he shows signs of caring. So, he gave him some nibble-treats, took the waste bags for me on his way out, and left me feeling less cheerful at the thought of who I will get as a replacement Carer? Tsk!

I got on with yesterdays blog catching-up. Which took me a few hours. Grumph! Thanks to Shaking Shaun and Peripheral Neuropathy Pete, both giving me some input. But Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley was as good as gold to me!

I made a brew of Thompsons Punjana and nearly caused a Faux-pas! And took one of the CBD capsules by mistake for the Codeine. Cor, that was close! The nurse said not to take them in the morning, only on retiring.

I got the blog done and posted off. Viewed and replied to emails and comments. Went on Facebooking. Then did some graphicalisationing on CorelDraw. Got as far as here and realised I’d not yet viewed the WordPress reader… so I did! It’s getting late now, so I started this blog.

I went to get the nosh prepared and cooking. And, by gum, the sun was blossoming now. I took a couple of the views on hand photographicalisationings for your perusal; the first towards my left, where the sun was.

The second one to the right, where I could get a prettier shot of the wonderfully blue, almost cloudless sky. I thought this one had a beauty to it.

Then I nipped back into the wet room, thinking I might have left the tap running… but all was okay.

Back into the kitchen, to take this picture of the pretty houses in front of the flats.

Huh! Back for a wee-wee yet again! It’s getting out of hand. Hehehe!

Then I got the number and rang the St Annes Centre to make an appointment with the Urologist. They will text me back with the appointment date and time?

Tried to get a J Sainsbury order in, and Wallah! And, I got one in! For next Tuesday 0630>0730hrs! I’m doing well, ain’t I?

Looking a little glum now.

Herbert was upping the clanging about. I think he was struggling to get to grips with something metal. He seems to have mastered it; he’s back to the tap-tapping again now. Well done, stridulant Hebert!

Got the nosh progress checked. All cooked, so I got the meal prepped and served up. Leaving the sink full of things needing cleaning up. I didn’t drop a single pea from the plate… yet! Haha! Gorgeous tasting effort; everything was so delectable. The black tomatoes and the buttered peas and potatoes were as close to perfect as they have ever been! Taste Rating: 9.2/10!

There was just one… well, two things that slightly marred the pleasure. The poor teeth could not cope with the wonderful tasting Cox’s Orange Pippin apple. I shall have to work out how not to waste the remaining three apples in the fridge. With the two loose teeth, I simply dare not risk biting into them… Could this be the end of my apple-eating days? So, sad! Sob!

Off to the kitchenette, the sun was doing its best to show me the weak Sunsetting and the multi-coloured clouds. Nice!

I got all the pots and utensils washed and draining, as the now getting famous door chime rang out its welcoming ♫ Oh, Susana ♫ tune. It was the evening carer. It was Carer Elena. I think she’s taken to me as I have her. Very caring, and we had a mini-natter too! ♥ She took the waste bag out with her as she left. Such a pleasant lady. It’s a true shame I wasn’t 35 years younger. ♥ 00Hehe!

Got changed into my night attire and remembered (No, I’m not kidding, I did remember) to take the Pure Hemp capsule. The nurse said it would take a few days to show any signs of improvement. I just hope that it helps me stay asleep for more extended periods. I’ve got to be patient, mind you.

However, I did make a mess of it. (Fancy that, hard to believe, I know, me making a mess of anything… Ahem!) I coughed as I was about to swallow it, and the plastic shell broke open! I got a mouthful of weed and seeds that seemed to get into every little hole, nook and cranny in my teeth. And believe me, there are plenty of them in my mouth. Danged useless Dentist!

I got settled in the £300, second-hand, c1968, Charity shop-bought, eyesorely-horrendously grungy coloured, haemorrhoid-testing, unfit-for-use, not working, recliner, in search of a long-lasting sleep… But no! Yet again, it was waking wide awake with a jump, what seemed to be every ten minutes or so. It was probably longer, though.

Ode to Lack of Sleep

Sweet Morpheus, hello? Can you listen to me, please?
I’m serious now; it’s not a joke, jape or wheeze…
I can’t sleep well or for very long, can you put me at ease?
I’ve not eaten owt to cause this… no fricassees, onion bargees…
No late scoffing any cobs of pickle and cheese…
No dreams of beautiful women in their negligees!
I don’t expect anything positive or guarantees…
If you can assist me, I’ll stop eating toffees…
I’ll be kind to animals, dogs, cats, chimpanzees…
Never again will I eat pickled walnuts or banoffee…
I need the rest, you sees?
For my arthritic knees…
If you can help, I’ll do good deeds…
I’ll even stop playing with my Frisbees!

The Nottingham Lads True Tales of Woe

Inchies Frictional, Unfrivolved, Fricking Friday!

Things started pretty well for me, oh, yah!

I got the Halloween hand-outs on display…

For carers, nurses, come who may,

Anyone visiting me from today…

Then got the potatoes, boiled with balsamic vinegar,

And a spot of Worcester sauce, & a pinch of demerara sugar,

They’ll do for later if I remember the bugger,

With the chilli, and put on some more sauce, tartar?

Titivated the kitchenette, dropped a jam jar!

An excellent job that it wasn’t the caviar!

The jar didn’t break, and it missed my feet…

Things were going well, all seemed alreet,

Off to the computer with a mug of tea, took a seat,

I even nibbled some biscuits, wholewheat!

The landline rangeth, the Amazon man, a right pain!

T’was then that my good luck, nosedived again!

We couldn’t understand what each other said,

So I went down to meet and talk to him instead,

His English was better than my Afghanistani,

But he left me, in the lurch, there was no barny…

He abandoned the food with me in the lift foyer, the Git!

I had to get the parcels into the lift, and I wasn’t fit…

Back up to the 12th-floor, struggled to get the bags out,

Then had to get them into the lobby,

Then into the flats lobby,

Then into the flat,

Then the hallway…

Then the kitchen, my energy drained away!

Next, the swearing started, I have to say!

The Git had put bleach in, it leaked, had to throw my bananas away!

The baguette buggered, utter dismay!

Tomatoes crushed, and I was feeling bushed!

Honey yogourts pot fell apart; I was further crushed!

Got the salvaged food sorted,

I was pissed off; I felt like I’d been ambushed!

The cooked ham was crumbs and crushed!!!

I was feeling despondent, to say the least!

Can’t see myself enjoying tonight’s feast!

Got the fodder all sorted… What was eatable anyway!

I was determined to get the treats out today for those who have helped me out over the year. Jenny, Norah and Frank, and Obergruppenfürher Deana and Obersturmbannfuhreress Julie, the ILCs (Indeependent Living Coordinators) at the flats. I rang them both to tell them I’d be coming down later to see if it was alright, as they may have been busy. Recorded messages on both phones that told me they must be busy. So I’ll get the goodies sorted out and go to Jenny then to the office with them.

As I was going out of the door, struggling a little with the walker-trolley, the postman came into the foyer. Oh, dearie me! This sounds like it may be a con-job?

An official-looking brown envelope, a white one, and then he handed me an ‘insufficient postage bill for nearly £11 for something that has been sent to me?

He kindly offered to ask his boss if he could pay for it for me, get the ‘parcel’, and I can refund him, and he’ll bring it in the morning. I was dubious, as I don’t think ~I am expecting anything through the post? Anyway, I thanked him and took him up on his generous offer for me, with a certain feeling of doom.

The white envelope was from Meridian, three A4 pages, about my Christmas needs for carers, Logging-in, Shadowing & Spot Checks, McMillan Charity Ball, On Call Centre procedure, and a Service-User Forum Wednesday 8th December at Foxton Gardens.

I didn’t over concentrate on owt, but the dodgy sounding parcel postage cost thingy. Then thought I’d try ringing the Wardens again, let them know I was coming down to see them and ask if they could have a look at the Social Services letter for me.

Finally, I got back to the walker-trolley of goodies, of off down to Jenny’s. On the way down, I thought to myself… well, I felt sorry for myself, really. Everything suddenly going into panic mode; surely things must calm down now… Hahahahahaha! Crap!

I called at Jenny’s flat, rang the bell and knocked on the door, and returned to the lift.

Down and into the connecting corridor with Winwood Court.

Called at the Wardens Interrogation and Body Search Room and dropped off the nibbles. Dean checked the Attendance forms for me, and I signed them. At last, something was going right – Hey-Ho! Little did I know what Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops still awaited me yet!

Then realised I had not put the prescriptions list in the envelope.

Back up and down in the lift again, and down to Deana.

Gawd, it did! I thanked Deana and hobbled out of the Winwood Court foyer, the first time I’ve been in the fresh air for months now, I think… But it proved to be a hazard ridden journey to the post-box to mail the letter… Just when I stupidly thought things were getting better again…

Unbeknownst to me, the wind was howling out there, and it whipped the envelope and paperwork out of my hand, high up in the sky, swirling around and then seemed to turn back in my direction, falling down in the car park twixt the vehicles. So, if it had blown off again, I would not have seen it again… Semi-panic mode engaged. I pursued the envelope and had to search a bit to find it. Still, the relief when I saw it trapped in between the branches of a bush was welcomed, even more so when I managed to get at it in time before it flew off into the clouds again!

I limped hastily as I could to the mailbox, checked the envelope, and posted it; thank heavens for that. Although, my EQ told me it would not have mattered, because as the voice said: “You ain’t going to get no financial help, any and either way, cocker!” Which was a smidge disheartening, bearing in mind EQ has never been wrong with his forecasts… no, I tell a lie, sorry. He was once, just the one time.

I hobbled back inside and just had to tell Deana what had happened. At least she got to laugh out loud before going home for the weekend, bless her. Hehe!

I set off along the link corridor and got to the connecting door.

Boy, did I feel a fool!

I could feel the key fob in my jacket pocket, but could I find a way in to get it? No! I assumed it had gone through the lining of one of the pouches. Back through link passage and to Deana, thinking she may have some scissors for me to use, to cut through the pocket.

Within a few seconds of investigating the jacket pocket for me, Deana put on a broad grin – that I believe actually said, “What a pillock!” As she pointed out that the sleeveless coat had two pockets on either side, one behind the other!

I blushed, felt the pillock above, thanked her, and scurried away in embarrassment and fast as I could… back, yet again along the corridor.

The hobble back into Woodthorpe was masked by the deep and genuine worry about what the hell am I doing? Since retirement, nothing going right, or even things going wrong, has been a part of my life, but I am not coping so well with things nowadays.

The trip up in the lift left little recollections of anything. I should have guessed that Dizzy Dennis and Shaking-Shoulder-Shirley were about to erupt; the hassle for such a long time nearly always ends in a tumble or similar – this time was no different, I’m afraid; Well, it was actually.

The haze came over me as I began to push the trolley through to the lobby from the cage. I gave myself such a bash on the right shoulder; it knocked me sideways, I clouted my back on the other side of the lift, and I went down, almost in slow motion!

My Luck Changed!

I had no idea who it was, but a bloke came out of the end flats and got me up on my feet again. See, I am fortunate sometimes. I think he knew me cause he guided me back to the flat and helped get the trolley in for me. Not sure what we spoke about, but I think we did have a natter.

I made a brew of Glengettie Gold and sat down doing absolutely nothing, but fretting of course. Nodded off for ten minutes. Woke up in need of a wee-wee and felt so much better, then? Back-Pain-Brenda was the main pain-giver, but you can’t blame her after that little backwards tumble. Hahaha! I made another drink, and took a Cocodamal, then got on with updating this blog. I hadn’t really realised how late it was, although with all the palaver I should have expected it, the Evening Carer arrived.

It was Helen. After she’d done the medications, it was she who told me what a terrible day she’s been having. Bless her! When I related my day so far and showed Helen the photographs (I was still doing the blog updating when she arrived), She did laugh! Which was good cause it might have cheered her up a smidgeon, I hope.

I realised that I could not find the Warfarin card anywhere. Mmm? Mayhaps I dropped it when I collapsed on my rump? I went to check in the elevator cage. Nope!

Summat else to worry about now, Tsk! I got back in the front room and was going to do another search of the multi-pocketed jacket… when… I spotted it on the carpet underneath the computer cabinet.

I pressed on with this blog updating, and woe of woes, I got as far as I heard and realised it was almost midnight! I’d better get something to eat… ah, yes, the chilli and the crushed brochette, or whatever its name is, bread to me.

While doing the cooking, it was complicated for an old chap, like what I am. Some done in the crock-pot, chilli-con-carne on the saucepan on the hob, and wedges in the microwave, and as for all the cleaning up afterwards… Humph! Where was I?

Oh, yes, I took photographicalisations of the night sky.

Part Of The Nottingham Lads True Tales of Woes – With Odes Series.

Impure Inchy – Thursday 4th March 2021 Diary

♥ TFZer Actresses on stage! ♥


Thursday 4th March 2021

Spanish: Jueves 4 de Marzo de 2021

23:40hrs: I removed my over-flabbily-bellied body from the c1968 recliner and utilised the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee Bucket). A short sharp affair, with a lot of CMD (Cessational Micturition Dribble) to follow.

No messing about, I got on the computer to create a template for today’s blog. Starting with doing a few graphics on CorelDraw. But, I didn’t get too far, the call to the Porcelain Throne arrived, so, off to the wet room. Incidentally, Cartilage Cathy was a lot kinder to me this morning.

It seemed to me that the daily PTDDSB (Porcelain Throne, Daily-Domination-Stakes- Battle) for supremacy in the evacuation was a close thing. Still, a comeback from Constipation Konrad had curbed the rampant messy tendencies of Trotsky Terence for once! So, I had a go at the crossword puzzle as I waited for things to kick-off. Just as yesterday, I didn’t solve a single clue! (Well, I’m consistent, if not capable. Hehehe! The movement started slowly and stayed that way, but no pain or bleeding, and as I said, it was a lot less mess to clean up. I still had to refill the tank by hand though, I think the problem is the fluffy too-thick toilet roll paper.

Back to the grahicalisationing, I went. Then made-up and started this template. Which took me ages to get this far with. Then, I went on to update the Wednesday Diary, at long last. I got it updated fully, emailed the link and went on the WordPress Reader section. Which I enjoyed considerably. Pinterested a couple of photographs, the read and replied to the WP comments that had come in. Some witty puns and quips came on this Thursday.

I was about to start collating the advance templates and realised the hours had shot by; it was time to get the ablutions tended to. As is usual with me, I got into the kitchen and got myself sidetracked once more.

I decided to get the hand-washing done first. But and however – guess who had left the hot water tap (faucet) to run cold? Yes, pickle-brain Inchcock had struck-again! Gawd-blimey, I this far too often! Hence decision had to be made (another Inchcock problem area!) My EQ told me there nothing to do but press on handwashing boiling the water in the kettle and saucepan, for more Whoopsiedangleplops were on their way! He also called me a name, a naughty one!

So, the half-hour or so handwashing exercise took me nearly two hours! Not to mention the scolding of two fingers fetching the kettle to the sink… Oh, I’ve said it! It’s a good job that I was in a slightly better mood today! I washed the long-sleeve jumper, the jammie-bottoms and the pair of long bamboo diabetic socks. The washed ones from yesterday were not fully-dry enough to put on today, so I got a couple of 100% short-ones to adorn after the ablutions to wear.

Then, as I checked the dryness of the other things that were hanging above the kitchen window, with perfect-timing, Peripheral Pete went into an involuntary right-leg Neuropathic Schuhplattler dance routine! This caused me to drop the coat-hangars and the washing I had in my hand. Belt Cathy Cartilages knee against the floor cupboard, and hit my head against the heater getting back up again!

I made a start on moving the stuff back into the cupboard, but soon lost interest!

My new found emotions of satisfaction, semi-contentment and renewed hopes sank without a trace! I took some painkillers and moped my way to the wet room, leaving the clothes where they had fell on the floor, and swearing a little still, got to the wet room, totally uninterested in what I was there for! Pissed-off would be a quicker way of putting things!

Had I been aware of what was waiting for me, I wouldn’t have gone in! The worse Ablution session in months!

Ablutionalisticalisationing Report:

  • I realised there was no hot water to be gleaned from the sink tap for shaving! But felt sure I would manage using the hottish water from the shower-head without any bother (What an idiot!)
  • Have you ever had to keep going to the other side of the wet room, and with Peripheral Pete shaking me about like a good un, repeatedly, bring the shower-head, which only just reaches the sink, and spraying the tepid water all over yourself and the room? It’s not easy! The cleaning up afterwards wasn’t either!
  • The de-nasalising went well. No water needed, you see! One dropsy only!
  • The teeth-cleaning had a bit of discomfort.
  • Then the shaving began. I had to keep emptying the sink of the water that went too cold, turning up the thermostat, and dial, to get as hot that I could from the control panel, but it wasn’t scorching enough, even then.
  • The whole shaving job was farcical in the extreme. Although having said that, there were only five dropsies! A few little nicks and one cut under the chin. One the throat, two in the neck-hole, and one on the cheek.

I got belated Health Checks done next. The Boot’s, made in China Sphygmomanometer’s SYS reading was fantastically low! Grrreat!

At least I think it is; hang on, I’ll check on Mr Google later on.

The in Hong Kong produced, Chinese Harpin Xian Di contactless thermometer reading was, I think, a smidge high, but well down on yesterdays worrying high of 37.9°c – 100.22°f.

Since the side-effect-ridden AstraZeneca Covid-19 vaccination was given to me a week last Saturday, SYS has also been higher, its the lowest reading today than for ages. I think I might be getting confused here, between the SYS and the temperature? Well, fancy that!

I found an NHS site on Google, where you can put in your reading for SYS and DIA, and you get an instant show of where you stand on the chart, with a black cross! Proof that I was right to worry when the SYS went up to 180 five days ago, well, that was well in the red area!

Gotten Himmel! Look at the time! What happened, where did it go?

I’d better close down and get my pre-planned, easy, tasty (I was well wrong there!) meal prepared. I’m afraid the beautiful looking Iceland bought tin of tomatoes was terribly bland, tasteless, watery. Savourless and unappetising. These Don Holio chopped tomatoes needed a warning giving-out about them for anyone unlucky enough to buy any. The Sainsbury crispy smoked ready-cooked bacon slices were very fatty tasting as well! The last of the sourdough bread saved the meal. A flavour-rating of 4.5/10 was granted. Reluctantly to a degree! Eurgh!

However, and leaving the pots in the sink in cold water to be cleaned when I have some hot water again, in the morning, at first, I was well-pleased that I was in time to watch the channel 11, Tales of the Unexpected episodes.

I stayed awake until the first set of commercials, and Sweet Morpheus visited me, and off into the land of nod I floated.

And slept for four unbroken hours, which was so nice! Ahh!

Inebriate Inchy – Saturday 27th February 2021 Diary

♥ TFZers at the lake? ♥

Inchcock Lie!


INCHCOCK TODAY DIARY

Saturday 27th February 2021

Mongolian: 2021 оны 2-р сарын 27-ны бямба гараг

00:30hrs:  I woke, in complete denial of moving, went into a slugabed mode and nodded off again. Repeatedly!

When I stirred for about the tenth time, it was 02:48hrs, and the need for the Porcelain Throne cruelly forced me into physical activity, Humph! Freeing my overly-stomached body from the £300, second-hand bought, c1968, sickeningly beige-coloured, not-working, uncomfortable, rusty, rickety-recliner, and catch my balance for walking, was a battle to get it done in time. The need for the evacuation was growing more urgent, and I moved as fast as possible, only just getting there on time!

Trotsky Terence yet again won the PTDDSB (Porcelain-Throne-Daily-Domination-Stakes-Battle). Poor old Constipation Konrad was annihilated! Almost 50% liquid, running droplets of red and brown, with streaks of white evacuated into the WC bowl! Messy, but not painful today, though! But the foul aroma produced did me no good, Eurgh!

Then the farcicalities started!

  • First, the cleaning of oneself must have taken a third of the toilet roll, and ten-minutes!
  • Then, the evacuated product was encouraged to go down into the sewer, which took three hand-fillings of the water tank and eight flushes to complete!
  • Then I found some of the ‘liquid’ had escaped earlier, and the PPs needed changing! That took effort, time and cost me £2 for the too-small substituted by Sainsbury’s PPs! They had to be used up!
  • I washed and then put some of the Harpic bleach White & Shine toilet cleaner with baking soda and lemon around the WC bowl. (I highly recommend this most effective, fresh-smelling product!)
  • Pleased the sorting out was done, I turned to leave the wet room… Oh, Dearie me! I hit the back of my right shoulder blade on the edge of the doorframe as I was leaving.
  • Of course, me being the brave, heroic, confident, none-whinging type of person I am, there was no cringing or sobbing involved. Ahem!

I made a brew and took the evening medications I’d forgot tot ake, with an extra pain-killer, and rubbed in some Phorpain Gel as far as I could reach, anyway. Then did the Health Checks. The body temperatures was a touch of anosmia, at a high 37.6°c – 99.68°f, in the red. I wasn’t caught out by this. I’ve a little fever and been shivering a little all morning. The Boots Sphygmomanometer readings were just fine, though. SYS 137. DIA 63, and the Pulse at 88.

I added the findings of the results to the now working again Excel chart. Apparently, the temperature has been high for a while now. Not that I can get to tell the Doctor, of course, or do something silly, like ask for advice.

I got the ridiculous idea of going out on the balcony to take a shot of the moon and the car park below Chestnut Walk. The car park one was not one of my better efforts… in fact, it was absolute crap!

The picture of the moon wasn’t up to much, either.

The worst thing was that the fever got worse, and I was going sweaty then freezing alternately. Ah, well, I can’t win them all! Well, any really!

The computer started alright the first time. And set to updating the Friday Diary, and I  got it finished in a decent time today.

I emailed the link, Pinterested some snaps, and at this stage, I was handicapped with Colin Cramps having a half-hour bash at the left hand and fingers! I had to stop typing altogether. He doesn’t usually attack like this during the day; night time is his standard attack time.

I took the opportunity to make another mug of Glengettie and take the belated morning medications with another pain killer to ease the shoulder’s pain. I had a couple of mini swiss rolls with the brew. Then I got some leeks cooking in the crock-pot.

I got involved in the Health Unlocked site, reading in my Anticoagulation pages.

I made a couple of comments and then joined the Peripheral Neuropathy Section and made a comment there. The lady answered very quickly. I’d told her of the after-effects of the AstraZeneca Vaccine. It’s nice to see how others cope with the problems they have that I can relate to, and offer a little support… and get some back, as well. ♥ I enjoyed an hour or so reading of others ailment. Nice break! And, I was beginning to feel a bit better in myself as well, at last! The shivering had stopped, and the shoulder was easing off. Yee-Haa!

I got the leeks from the crock-pot into a saucepan. Washed the dish-bowl and opened a can of Hubbard’s cheapo Chilli-con-Carne. I added it to the saucepan and out in the garden peas. Gravy seasoning, two vegetable Oxo cubes, and a beef flavour pot to the mix stirred it up well, put it on low heat, and a slash of Balsamic vinegar and a pinch of Roast Capsicum seasoning, and lastly, some passata with basil!

That was that; my evening nosh all planned! I’d got some of the Milk Roll bread left from last night to soak it up with. I’d have liked to risk using the Dynamite Chilli.

But I’m aware that things are not yet settled healthwise after the dangerous AstraZeneca vaccine from a week ago! Gawd, I fear having a second shot!

Ah, well, I must try to get some more graphics done to use later off onto CorelDrawing. I got three drawings done to use, and the weariness was dawning.

I was moving into ‘Kaput-Mode’. So got the Chilli meal prepped and served up.

Although it was tasty enough, it took a lot of eating for some reason. And I managed to get the things into the sink to soak and even started to watch an Auf Wiedersehen Pet episode, but blissfully I nodded off, and I slept for five hours!

Intangled Inchies Diary – Monday 15th February 2021

TFZer Lillie, at her weekend cottage


Inchcock Today

Monday 15th February 2021

Finnish: Maanantai 15 Helmikuuta 2021

05:00hrs: Woke up to pains from Cartilage Cathy, and where Colin Cramps had been having a go at me again, nocturnally! But, nothing, compared to the previous two nights. I drank no end of spring water yesterday, and as Tim Price says, it seemed to have helped! At least I got a few hours kip in, a decent four hours I work it out as.

As soon as I attempted to move my old aching limbs, and flobby-bellied torso from the Grotty, £300, second-hand, c1968, unsteady, not-working, incommodious, sickeningly beige-coloured, haemorrhoid-testing recliner to catch my balance. Cathy and Arthur Itis complained, and the knees were dodgy again, so I really took my time, gingerly hooked the wooden walking stick over my shoulder, and tried to walk to the kitchen, without using it. I got there without any hassle, but, as I mention, I was weary and planning my route near solid objects I could use if I did go over.

No wee-wee called for? I got the kettle on and cracked my elbow on the countertop, and calmy muttered some oath or other – good heavens, my voice was all nasal and croaky? There was mucus wanted to come out from the throat and nose, I got rid of a bit of it. But it was still better than two days ago, just the knees and Colin Cramp’s after-effects were any bothers. I talked myself into an even-keel frame of mind.

I tackled the pre-Dump Health Checks. The dependable, trustworthy, Chinese manufactured Boot’s Sphygmomanometer results were okay. SYS 161. DIA 70 PULSE 90. A good start!

In Hong Kong, the Chinese Harpin Xian Di contactless thermometer returned decent reading, lit up in the green. Of 36.7°c – 98.6°f. A smidge high, but well down on what it has been some days. So, no complaints from me!

I made a brew of Glengettie, took the morning medications, and got a packet of the luxury Lemon Wafers out, for the nurse when she calls to take my blood. When she’s been, I’ll nip some down for the Jenny family, I bet Frank and Nora will love them.

The legs seemed to be regaining some muscle now, that Colin Cramps has had a ball with the legs and hands these last three nights.

I’d let the tea go cold, so I went to make another mashing. Oh, the fog falleth!

I constipated on getting the Sunday Diary updating done, I’ve got to make a template for today. It’s all go! Concentrationalistically, I pressed on and got it finished, but it took me a few hours. Thanks to Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters being so kind to me, I hope this continues for a while, Grrreat! Got it done and posted-off to WP. Then on Facebooking, but with my getting up late, it was time to get the ablutions done, before the nurse arrives.

I had to use the Porcelain Throne first. Despite my best efforts, nothing moved again, a couple of tiny meatballs, and they hurt on the way out!

The Ablutions went really well! In total, I had only six dropsies! Yes! The getting dressed was the opposite of yesterdays when I put on Tent-like new PPs. I adorned one of the blue ones, just the reverse, these were the ones sent too small a size. Things were getting a little squashed! Tsk!

I hand-washed the Afghanistani made turquoise thick-thermal long-sleeved jumper. Washed, rinsed, fabric-softened, rung and hung it up above the sink, to drip dry. The Coronvurus might be beaten by the time it dries. Hehe! 

Then, back to the Porcelain Throne, I fell confident of an evacuation this time.
Which just goes to show you
how wrong a man can be! Apart from a few more rock-hard walnut-sized lumps, a fair bit of wind, and the innards giving me some jip. Humph!

Washed, and went back to the kitchenette, the fog seemed about the same as earlier on.

I’ll have to dish these PPs, too inhibitive, far too small. Will, I ever get a pack of them that isn’t too large or too small? I bet Tena are making a fortune and clearing out there small and XXL stock! Gragfackles!

I did the Post-Dump, Health Checks.

SYS 162, DIA 71, Pulse 89, on the Boots Sphygmomanometer, manufactured by, ZDEAC (Zhongshan Daguan Electrical Appliance Company Ltd) Guangdong, China.

Body temperature at 37.2°c. Which is lower than it has been for a while, but apparently, still a midge high?

I updated the XL Health Check log, and it was back to the Porcelain Throne again.

No joy, things had not loosened, they’d done the opposite I reckon. Nothing moved, but I knew there was a significantly impacted dollop in there, praying to be freed! Oh, dearie me!

I went in search if a new bob-cap, I knew was in the junk room somewhere.

After an hour or so, I found it, at last, I keep my head warm at least.

The label, a Primark one, tells me this Chinese manufactured Head Heater, hat, was 2.6 togs? I got it on straight away, snug as a bug!

I made a start on the template for today, then began to work on it.

WordPress was messing about with the picture gallery, that confused me a bit.

Four hours later, I went onto the WordPress Reader section.

I came across this photograph on the SD card. Must be another one taken in error? But when and what, beat me. Any guesses?

Time to get some sarnies made up for nosh. Oh, I’ve not seen any signs of the nurse? I double-checked on the Google Calendar – Wot a plonka! It’s next Monday! Still, I can nip the nibbles down the Jenny, Nora and Frank. So, I did.

Returned, and made up a nosh. I rather spoilt myself. Milk Roll buttered pork sarnies, being the highlight.

Flavour Rating: 8/10!

Colin Cramps visited again, but not as bad as is usual.

Sleep came belatedly, whenever Colin eased off, the Thought-Storms took over. But I managed a four-hour nod -off!

TTFNski.

 

Inciter Inchcocks Sunday 14th February 2021, Diary

TFZers in the Woods – Nibbling?


Sunday 14th February 2021

03:00hrs: I was still awake with cramps, evil, more persistent than ever, and had been driving me crazy, for five hours now. Hands, fingers and both lower legs!

As I gently eased my Goliath-like stomached body up onto the legs, the pain and unsteadiness made me plop back down into the recliner. Which really pleased Harold Haemorrhoids, I can tell yer! I waited patiently and started doing gentle leg exercises. I was actually a little nervous at walking, but the wee-wee was needed. So I grabbed Metal Micky, and gently slow-hobbled to the wet room, the bucket was full?

I went about six-feet or so, and the agony in the knees was chronic! Of course, a young full-blooded, healthy, dynamic person like me didn’t wince, swear, cringe, cry or give out noises that sounded a bit like a dying mousse! Took the wee-wee, it made me wonder how the bucket ever got filled last night, cause even with the after-dribbles, the whole effort wouldn’t have filled a coffee cup! I got the camera, to have a look at the state of the legs: They looked like they did last night, after Colin Cramp’s first half-hour attack. The muscles at the bottom of the leg, were all soft and gooey to touch, and the tops of the portion, seemed to have got fatter? There’s an apparent reason for this… but I don’t what it is.

It was clear to me that both of the old ulcer scars had been active on the surface, although once again, why, defeats me? While we’re on about my Not-Knowings, a lovely new bruise at the top of the leg? I’m sure I’d have remembered if I’d fallen over or walked into something? I’m not so sure now I’ve just said that… Hahaha!

I don’t know why I bothered, but I applied some Phorpain Gel where I could reach. I must have used half a tube last night, took extra Codeine, and later on, a Zapain (which was donated by a kind mystery resident, thank you). Germoloided poor Harold Haemorrhoids, and took the morning medications.

For a moment, the throat was parched, and when I coughed, I brought up a tremendous amount of phlegm.

At the back of my mind, I feared the bug was going to come back again. I wasn’t apprehensive, I laughed at the thought, and verbally challenged the flu bug to try again! Ahem!

I began the Pre-Dump Health Checks. At least the Boots Sphygmomanometer, had SYS down to 142. Dia 78, and thankfully, the pulse down to 87bpm.

The Chinese (Hong Kong) made by Shenzhen Relee Electronic & Technology Co. Ltd, contactless thermometer temperature, down to 36.8°c. Things might be improving, eh?

I made up some bags of waste and added them to those already in the walker-guide box. Washed the pots, and off to the Porcelain Throne. Apart from some ferocious sounding, almost audible rumbles and grumbles in the wet room, along with some near-lethal microscopic escapages of wind, nothing happened? Things felt rock solid, methinks that this DESB (Daily-Evacuation-Stakes-Battle) between Trotsky Terence and Constipation Konrad, was one-sided, favouring Konrad! I gave it a good few minutes, just in case, like. I’ve been fooled and caught out before! In fact, I’m ace at it!

As I washed my hands, I noticed that the two packets of PP’s I’d bought, both had ladies wearing them on the wrapping? A closure inspection found they were Unisex, but the Tena ones were XXL! I’ll try one of these when I get the ablutions done, dying to find out what they are like.

After all that hassle with Morrisons and Sainsbury’s who substituted the wrong size PPs – Now Amazon have sent the wrong size as well. Tsk!

I made a brew of Thompsons Punjana. Took the medications, and onto the computer to update yesterdays Inchcock Today. After an hour or so, the second summoning to the Porcelain Throne arrived, a little bubbling from within, told me one could be the real McCoy, off to the wet room.

I got settled down and got the crossword book handy, but it wasn’t needed. The rumbling inside felt like the old music played at the cinema, and things come to a crescendo – a few seconds later, the movement started, smooth as silk… a thunder of plop-plops, water hitting the rear-end, and it was all over! No pain at all! Well, I didn’t expect that! Nor, unfortunately, the copiousness of the flowing blood! Tsk! I’d just cleaned the bowl as well! As I looked down at the blood, it was all the same colour as poor old Herbert’s Haemorrhoids usually pass. That would be, I assume, blamed on my plopping back down on recliner as I first tried to get up. So, I wasn’t too concerned, I’ll get the ablutions done shortly and clean and Germoloid the little things.

I got the Post-Dump Healthier Checks done. The Sphygmomanometer had the SYS up to 163, DIA at 75, and the Pulse was 83bpm. This is not bad at all compared to what the last weeks readings have been.

The Chinese (Hong Kong) Shenzhen Relee Electronic & Technology Co. Ltd, contactless thermometer, made me nervous though.

Mind you, it not in the red proper, more like an orange or amber.

The temperature was back in the red again, at 37.7°c – 99.86°f. It’s been higher on three of the ‘Flu-Affected’ days this week.

I’ve looked at the HC log, the SYS is more worrying now…

 If I’m not fretting, fearing or frightened of something, I’m just not happy! Hehehe!

Off to get the Ablutions sorted out. And what an unanticipatedly pleasant way to start this session! The look got an inspection while I was doing my teeth, I had to fetch the camera and see how they changed early morning? Fair enough the old ankle scars still look like they are about to get ready to erupt again, but they are not fooling me, they often do this, haven’t burst for well over a year now.

The shaving produced just two nicks. And Teeth and shaving combined, only five dropsies! On the other hand, the shower had I got a video of it, would have gone viral – at least ten dropsies! Two clouts on the grab bar, and decent headbutting of the power box! Followed up with a toe-stubbing against the shower chair. Ah, well! The medicationalisationing went fine! Too well, it was worrying!

I remembered to put one of the XXL PP’s on to see how they fitted. Just look at the size of them.

*At least if I get caught out in a snowstorm, I can use them for a tent! Hehehe!

*If I sneeze, I might jump out of them?

*They are comfortable enough, though, just a little tight under the armpits.

Har-Har! I’m back on form with the witticisms. I must be getting better.

Unlucky in shop substitutes, lucky in love. No, that’s not right…

Time to get my chef’s hat on, and prepare Josie’s cheesy potato nosh. A reet treat this week. The cheesy mash was p[probably the best I’ve ever made, mind you, it cost a bomb, it the butter, Leicester Cheese, strained Tuna Chunks, Surimi sticks, tomatoes roast crispy onions, pickled egg, demerara-sugared garden peas, Baby bell coins, Pink Gin and Tonic, cream strawberry, or is it a raspberry trifle. Ah, I’ve just put the photo on the blog – can you see a face in the potatoes, of a fish? I’ll make it a little larger.

Delivered it, I don’t want to spoil Josie and overdo it, she might expect a feast each Sunday, then. Hahaha! She seemed to like the look of it.

I made a start on removing the waste to the chute room. Through the lonely, abandoned, eerie 12th floor. Haha!

The top middle picture shows some light coming at the end of the lobby, through from the window that views the back of Woodthorpe Grange Park.

The windows cannot be got at to clean either, but the site of the frozen snow on one part of the field, and hardly anywhere else. A closer look, the area had been fenced off.

I didn’t go back to the flat, I went and got a lift down to Jenny’s apartment. Dropped of some nibbles for the three of them. That’s Jenny, Nora and Frank. I really do miss having a natter, chinwag, moan, gossip, call it what you will. Ahh!

Dropped the bag outside the folk’s door, and back to get a lift up to my floor. The notice was on the lift floor.

Had a bit of a wait to get an elevator back up, and tried to take a photo with my reflection against the lift doors.

I got back up to the flat in no time, and en route, the shivers came over me, and some phlegm came up. I do pray that the flu isn’t trying to come back. Or, whatever it was. Please!

Got the trolley in the corner in the hallway, and guess what? I found waste and recycling bags I’d missed loading – so I loaded them. Tsk!

The Amazon treats arrived, I intend to hand these out as thanks for the help I get. Jenny, Doris and Frank, the nurses and the ILCs. The review I read on these lemon wafers, indication aa certain deliciousness!

I spent the next five hours doing this blog, then decided to stop, cause I was done-in suddenly. I’ll make some sarnies for my nosh and a few tomatoes methinks. Which I did, and it went down a treat! Flavour rating was a decent, nae, highly satisfactory 8/10.

When I settled and got me feet up, almost instantly, and Colin Cramps kicked off, legs the worst, but the hands and fingers were put through the mill a bit. Thank heavens, it didn’t go on all night for the third time. But I’d been drinking a lot of spring water throughout the day, this may have eased things, but I don’t know.

TTFN.