13 | August | 2025 | Inchie Today

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Being reigning ineptitude champion didn’t come easily,
You need a brain that is damaged, architectonically,
I had help when I was born, my Mother dropped me,
Told the midwife she doesn’t want it, throw it away,
That’s how my life started. I’m still unlucky today,
Within a week, we had to move; the rent we couldn’t pay,
My being another mouth to feed led Mother to inequity,
We moved to the Meadows, ruled by the ochlocracy,
Got thrown into a canal, rescued by the constabulary
Chopped my thumb in half, terribly bloody…
My eyesight was getting misty and foggy,
Then started feeling dizzy and groggy,
Dad said I’ll not use cash unwarrantedly,
Had to have a tonsillectomy & appendectomy,
Dad pulled my teeth with his pliers for free,
The opticians, I never got to see…
Well, I did ten years later in 1973,
School? I learnt nothing much, educationally,
I used obliquity to ensure survivability,
The school joker, the idiot… well, it fitted Inchy,
A false face, I’m not afraid, acting bravely…
But my underpants often got messy,
Tried to avoid beatings using comedy,
Got a part-time job as a gas lamp lighter/snuffer,
I left school at fourteen. What would life proffer?
I moved on to work as a vanlad, come labourer,
I started at a Bulwell factory as a van-lad deliverer,
I soon realised that in life I was an amateur,
A drifter, unconfident, nervous & no glitter,
Dental bother with a bleeding alveolar,
I earnt £3-3-0 for a weekly defrayal,
1962, when smoking & drinking were not punishable,
A pint when drinking was no trouble,
Tory PM Macmillan made taxes attenuable,
The year of the birth of Starmer, the adumbral,
Comparing them, Starmer, who’s dishonest & cruel,
I’d pay someone to kill the fool,
But I don’t have the wherewithal,
I think this Ode is one of my most wackadoodle!
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No carers are available to take photos today. So, there are none, or they have been used before. (A little like me… Hehehe) I created the above graphics with CorelDraw (the crashing programme) and they turned out okay.
Plus, besides and as well as that. The Paramedics were called to come and treat me again!
It’s already so late in the day. The medical tests delayed me for ages, I bashed my head again; that’s why the Carer called the ambulance, when she spotted the original wound was bleeding. The Carres send a message to HQ after each visit, and it was the ICC boss lady who called them.

It’s been so long since I could get around to the writing part of this blog that I am relying on the scribbled notes from the pad. There are a lot of them, but just glancing at it, much of it is unreadable, so, no guessing, I’ll leave them off, so as not to confuse you or myself when I read this later.

Glaucoma, Gladys, delayed me further when I walked into the kitchen to make a brew of Thompson’s Punjana tea, and the direct sunlight hit my eyes. I was virtually blinded for about ten minutes. But still struggled and made myself a brew… scalding my thumb as I poured the water from the kettle! Finger under the cold water tap for a long time, then washed the sink, and put some Savlon on the digit. Leaving the flipping hot water tap running while I had some R&R for the eyes to recover. The water was stone cold! So, no shaving or showering again! I must look awfully rough-faced. In other words, I need to get a shave and shower after the water reheats on the nighttime economy thingamajig. Knowing full well that I’ll never get to do it tonight, cause the fatigue is already coming over me. Leaving me annoyed, as tomorrow is a busy day.

Carer Nimra told me she is doing the long call tomorrow, which is her first time. So, how can I find time for a shower & shave? I’ll have to go down to show her the ropes, where the laundry room is, how the machines operate and the timing. If a machine is not free, we’ll be buggered. Because then I won’t get the washing done, as the Carers have a limited time allocated. Often, the Carer is too busy to dry the washing and brings it back damp and wet. Which means hanging it all up in two rooms, to fully dry, and I have to hang it, remember it, and I’ve depressed myself at the very thought of this scenario happening again.
It’s not Carer Nimra at fault. I could do with getting more time allotted for a Wednesday, but, of course, can I afford it anyway? The simple answer is no, which I can’t. This adds to the depths of Darius.
I think today has been so busy that he couldn’t get through earlier. Hahaha!

I rose late, about 06:30 hours. I worked out that again I had had a nocturnal sleep-seizure. Because all the feelings and sensations were with me the instant that I stirred. Fogginess, confusion, insufficient balance and a refusal from the brain to respond to my wants and needs. I went nowhere after removing the night catheter bag. And, getting it off caused a hell of a pain from the head wound as I bent down. It’s been like this all day each time I bent to empty the day bag, it catches me unprepared, but later in the day I started remembering and took thing as slowly as I could, but in the end the pained with head down made me change tack, now I’m rushing it to get it over with each time. Trust me to be wearing a mini-day bag, which needs emptying more often! Not bending down, and the head is fine. The pain is emanating directly from underneath the wound itself. I should have told the Paramedics about this… then again, maybe I did, and forgot.

I was washing the tray from last night’s meal, and the intercom chimed. It was Carer Nimra; I let her in the foyer, and then I returned to finish the tray cleaning. I knocked over the walking stick, bent to retrieve it, the head would hurt, and I stood up too quickly and struck the head wound against the edge of the sink. I opened the flat door to let Nimra in, and she spotted that the wound was bleeding. Not a lot, though. She also said I looked very pale and asked if I needed an ambulance. Some unreadable words on the notepad here, sorry. While we were conversing, I was interrupted by struggling to find the words and . I think I was either waffling on or repeating myself, according to the notes. Nimra got my diabetic socks on, issued the medications, Phorpain gelled Cartilade Chloe, and departed, farewell exchanged.

The intercom burst forth with its jingle. I saw on the panel it was two paramedics seeking admission, so let them in.

I’d already completed yesterday’s blog post and posted it of to WordPress. And the landline burst into life.
It was from the boss lady at ICC. Inner-City-Care.
Telling me that paramedics are on their way. She must have read the report from Nimra and called them. Then, while I was on the phone, the medics arrived. And asked the usual series of questions. I pointed out my embarrassment at their being called. The tests were carried out while I answered the questions. After a long time and many tests, they handed me a written suggestion note and said cheerio. The note they left was photographed by Nimra later, along with a photo she took from the balcony for me.
It’s hard to read, but Carer Nimra read this out to me. Here’s how I decipher it now:
Specific Advice and Red Flags;
If any further falls, head injuries or any red flags occur, call 999.
Take it steady today.
Call 999 for.
Loss of consciousness.
Confusion.
Severe headaches.
Seizures lasting longer than usual.
Vomiting – Blurred Vision.

I’m living with confusion all day, every day.
Severe headaches – each time I bend down, even to empty the catheter pouch, but they ease as soon as I get stood upright again.
Glaucoma Gladys ensures the blurred vision.
Can’t win, can I? Har-har!

When the paramedics left, I tried to call ICC to let them know, and the landline chirruped.

I removed some food from the order that is due to be delivered tomorrow morning.

👩🏻‍⚕️ DVT-Warfarin nurse Christina rang. Bless her, she’s so kind to let me know when she’s coming.
She is due between nine and eleven in the morning. It’s going to be a busy day again on Wednesday. There’s so much to get done, but so little time to do it. Frustrated? Me?
Absobloodylutely!

I can’t get any food done yet. Until the last Carer arrives. I can put the oven on, though. Then it should be quicker to warm up after the visit is done. Blow it, I’ll make a start now, they could be here any minute or another hour.

Well, that worked well. The Carer took and sent me snaps of the pathetic as-it-turned-out tasting meal, and views from the kitchen window. I thank you!
View.
A poor do this one was.
Potatoes were bitter-tasting.
The tomatoes in the no-butter-buttered bread sarnies were even more insipid.
The sausage’s flavour was indescribable.
SHAME!

The night’s sleep was full of jerking awakes.
And occasionally were the guilty ailments. Later in the morning, had few twinges to release. Late morning, around 03:00hrs, they all suddenly stopped, and I had a great three more hours of blissful rest.
And when I woke up at 0600hrs, I noticed the absence of seizure after-effects. The previous two nights, I’m sure I had nocturnal seizures. Thankfully, none tonight, though.