Accifauxpa

Inchy Today: Thursday 24th April 2025

/ Inchie / 6 Comments

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Here’s what the future holds, I’ve gleaned,

Putin & Trump, agreements are formed,

Their wars were turbocharged,

Trump: Mexico was savaged,

Putin: Lithuania was occupied,

Trump wanted Canada but was denied,

Putin: finished Ukraine, on to Poland,

Trump: attack and took Iceland…

Putin: The Idle of man was scavenged,

Trump proved he was  unhinged,

Jamaica was attacked

Is this how it all ends? Can you imagine?

World Rulers, Trump and Putin?

The only opposition is China?

What of the UK, Australia…

France, Spain, Africa, India?

What of bean-counter, Starmer?

I’ve been advised by an astrologer-auger,

That this is not on our future agenda,

Who can avoid this abomination?

Save the world and each free nation?

You’d know if you were a Christian!

It would be lovely to be awestricken!
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A mixed day mentally. It was rife throughout. Today was a day of hard work that left me baffled. Sparse blog, sorry. Up at 04:50hrs. 

Hoovering.

Potatoes are ready to make cheesy spuds later.

First brew of Glengettie.

Kitchenette view.

Carer Ejaz arrived. Medications. Diabetic socks.

Window cleaner called. The price is going up by 20%. Spit! The first bit of bad news, plenty to follow.

Ocado delivery.
Cheesy cobs.
Fridge

Just as I was bending and stretching to reach the bowl, I’d just dropped on the kitchen floor. Whoopsiedangleplop! Balance-Loss-Bertha and Dizzy Dennis gave me a double assault.
Down I went, hitting my chin and head en route to the floor and landing on the pile of bottles I’d knocked over. My language was a bit crude!
Hitting the chin, set off Toothache Tiffany.
Then came the harrowing part. The trip on all fours to get to the c1966, £300 Oxfam charity shop-bought, wincingly grotty, beige-coloured, crumb-covered from my nocturnal nibbling, itch-making, uncomfortable, positively unhealthy, and dangerous, no longer operational, virus-breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, Catheter-tube-trapping recliner; to haul me back up onto my feet. The short journey must have taken me a good few minutes to get there. I had to keep stopping to move the catheter pouch into a less painful position. I was knackered when I got there, then faced the challenge of hauling my elephantine-bellied body up on the recliner. Only to find that 
it was bleeding from the tube tugging and adjusting en route.
More time was lost, having to clean and medicate Little Inchies’ fungal lesion and the scrape and bruise on the chin. That stung a tad! 

I moved back onto the computer. Concentration was terrible, mistakes rife, and I wasn’t feeling too good physically now, either. My work rate disintegrated, my mind wandered off of its own accord, and I had a prolonged, weird, cracking seizure when I recall most things. I knew I was doing wrong, but I just thought this was a dream and carried on blooping! That is unless I was really dreaming. The oddest one yet.

Coming out and back to semi-reality, the young lady Carer arrived. I was draining the urine from the day bag to the dedicated jug. I believe I had another mini, a few-second-long seizure at the same time. Peptac was taken given.

I started on the blogs. Only to realise that I felt the warm, wet sensation in my left sock, feet and slipper!
Yes, I’d failed to turn off the release valve on the catheter yet again! I think a combination of the Seizure, the effects from the tumble, and being distracted when the Carer was asking my questions may have caused this accident.
It’s been the same for some time now. As I was warned at the Dementia meeting, it will get worse, and it has… my concentration evaporates when I try to do two things at the same time nowadays.
I know I’ve left the taps running when the door chime rings or I get a telephone call from someone. I forgot what I was doing when interrupted.
I had to take off my socks, which was even more painful than the first Accifauxpa with the tumble, all-fours-crawl, and fungal lesion medicating! Then, I had to wash my feet – another challenge, as if the agony of getting my socks off was not enough! I fetched a bowl from the wet room and half-filled it, a jug at a time, with water from the sink to fill the bowl halfway. Washing up liquid and Dettol added. I brought a towel with me. I’m not sure how I’m going to dry my feet with it yet. I managed it, but it was another painful struggle. Fed up? Me? Yes! 
I sat my feet in the bowl for about twenty minutes, placed a food order for the next week, and returned to the blog. The water was well cold now. I had hoped a Carer might call early to offer some help, but no luck. I decided to wait for the Carer before risking carrying the split plastic bowl to empty and store in the wet room. Then, I decided to wash the urine-soaked socks I had left earlier, soaking in Dettol and laundry liquid in the kitchen sink. Rinsed them and hung them to dry.
Funny how one can get a picture to come into one’s mind instantly, word association, maybe? As I typed ‘hung’, I thought of Starmer! Ha-ha!

I got an email from the Bulwell-based Diabetes training folks.

Sunset shot.

I’d bought some Albert Bartlett potatoes.
£2.50 for 2kilograms. Well, the ones I had last year for baking cheesy potatoes were wonderful!
But not so much this time!
I knew I’d have difficulty with them when I saw the amount of black mould in them.
This is how they came out of the cooker, ready to have the husks emptied into a bowl and mixed with some no-butter butter.
Leicester cheese, sea salt, black pepper and Worcestershire sauce. 
However, it took me an hour to cook them in the oven and almost another hour to locate and remove the spots of black Rhizoctonia Solani, which I had investigated. It is a fungal disease that causes stem canker, damping off, black scurf, skin netting, and tuber growth distortions. And getting them back in what was left of the husks… well, I think I deserved a medal. The mixture was replaced in the skins and returned to the oven for twenty minutes until the tops were nicely browned and crisp. However, they did taste so good! But it took so long to sort them out that I was falling asleep eating them. 
With some pickled beetroots and Nordic bacon!

Naturally, after washing the load of pots, cutlery, basins, and plates, I settled down around midnight to watch the original Death Wish movie on TV.
But couldn’t, as it didn’t have any subtitles. I did not want to wake up the chap above by having the sound load enough for me to hear it. Those two or three floors above and below me would have all been disturbed. I’d have had a lynch party waiting for me in the morning. Haha!

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– Passe une bonne journée –
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Inchy Today: Wednesday 23rd April 2025

/ Inchie / 8 Comments

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GOOD RESULTS
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Failures, mistakes? I’ve become an epigone,
It made me downcast, glum, & woebegone,
Life today, I just can’t underfong,
Hopefully, I’ll not suffer for too long,
I’ll soon see St. Peter, and be logging on…
Depression is a vile botheration…
My mind in constant circumbilivagination,
Brain & body with little corroboration,
Worries, fears, defeats, no cachinnation,
My mental visitors seem all cacodaemon,
The Grim Reaper’s awaited clarion…
I’ve given so much contemplation,
No solutions, just failed bodge, after bodge!
Will I be an Angel, or Beelzebubian?
Will I find safety, a hide, or a bastion?
Will Hell hold or hide bacchanalian?
Hell, is it the source of depressionism?
The Devils home, desolation, damnation?
Will retain my delusion & disequilibrium?
Or judge my sacrilege, profanation?
Or take heed of my moral declension?
Are my thoughts all a misconception?
Are Heaven & Hell; both a delusion?
Yesterday’s confusion I’d like to mention,
The failures, fears, all in deliration!
Will either be divine, celestial, or elysian?
Or are both, just an illusion?
Is there no other option?
Humankind, developed by an alien?
Monitored, our every move digested…
To what we are affiliated, afflicted,
Angered, get-bladdered, how have we altered,
Sins, naughties that we have adopted,
As to why? I’m just bewildered,
We’re castigated, castrated, get cataracted,
We murder, kill, give & get castigated,
Is this message getting communicated?
Explaining one thoughts is complicated…
We’ve been constipated, not consolidated,
We’re disordered, we’ve dithered, doddered…
Defaulted, defected, deflected, & dejected,
Murdered, bribed, MPs get backhanded,
Alliances get disbanded,
Morals do not get expedited,
Freed murderers are paroled,
Honest citizens get exasperated,
Oligarchs laugh at food price rises,
These wrongs are never explicated,
Minds & computers should be expurgated!
Crimes excused, falsified, almost justified,
I’ve lost the plot; must get this ode finished,
Heaven or Hell, they can’t be selected,
Which makes many people frampold & fantad,
We’ve all be criticised, castigated, hated,
Our aggravations have snowballed,
Getting more vicious, but never alleviated,
If lies, deceit were air, we’d all be asphyxiated,
Is death, a feature of life, or a forfeiture?
It could of course be a forewarner…
Life’s gone, but what’s around the corner?
Heaven or Hell, which one would be better,
Naturally I don’t know the answer,
Well, speaking as a grammaticaster…
And obviously an experienced galumpher,
This is just a hypothesis or conjecture…
Bearing in mind I’ve got cachexia,
Which is better to have than copropraxia,
Reserved for those with a particular disorder?
Maybe those of us with ecdemomania?
Maybe I’ll fit into that category?
I could beg St. Peter for an amnesty,
He may consider my plea, ambiguously,
Though he may answer me astringently,
Heaven or Hell? – Hopefully, Heaven for me!
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Sorry but today has been a nightmare.
Carer Joe, replaced with Carer Ejaz.
Who had not done the three hour shift before.
Other things prevented my working on the blog for long. This is really the best I could do.
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05:30hrs: Up and wobbling about.
Kitchen safety checks, took this rainy kitchen view

Then I went to have a long session.
The full works. Hard work due to both cartilages and several mini-seizures during the two hour session.

Carer Ejaz visit. It appears we have only one of the beta blockers left in stock. Ejaz made notes on his mobile. Said he’d sort things out.

Computer, doing the long ode for today.

Raining a bit now, no sunshine out yet. (midday)

Rain started, rain stopped!

Well, I made a right mess of this evenings meal!
Failures: I undercooked the potato cakes. Never have I bought fattier, greasier Golonkowa. The carden peas were taty, though. Unfortunately, I found some mould on the wheatmeal rolls!
A sad end, to a tragic day!

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Not a good day by a mile. I’ll try to smile!
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Inchy Today: Sunday 20th April 2025

/ Inchie / 4 Comments

Cooked pot of pork knuckle, beetroots, pickled black beans and water chestnuts, a giant potato pancake, two doorstep sized slices of bread, and a spot of BBQ sauce added. A cheap icecream cone to follow.
Ate it all up, like a good little boy. Hehehe!

22:20hrs: I got bedded down, and was soon off into the land of slumber, where I had a dream.
I was in the Tardis, with Herr Starmer. I recognised it from the TV series, but there were also members of Parliament, all arguing. Starmer seemed oblivious to this, and carried on over-talking them. I wish I could recall more. But that’s all folks! As some old Walt Disney cartoons used to end. Not that I can recall it at the moment, but I reckon I must have got up during the morning, and took these photographs from the kitchen window. Putting them on, I remembered the green sky, and wondering what I’d done wrong?
To the right I think.
To the left I think.
Ahead, I guess.
Closer shot, ahead. (Brown now?)

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Well, he’s back another reactivation,
Imbedding in me, thoughts of a madman,
Or perhaps, to be closer, a badman…
Silly thoughts, developed, began…
Will I ever get to use a bedpan again?
A chance to dance, the twist or can-can?
If I’m reborn, I’d like to be a Casanovan,
I’m passing wind with power of a turbofan,
I can hear words, they’re stentorian…
However, I refuse to pay attention,
They are full of hatred & vilification…
Loathing, defamation, castigation…
Giving me collywobbles & trepidation,
They laughed at my coming trephination,
Is the voice mine? Am I in regression?
My alto-ego is a much better rhetorician,
I leave no progeny, offspring, scion,
What will I leave in residualisation?
With age, comes a painful realisation,
Unwarranted dismal and depression,
I’d use a little prognostication…
Involving perception, conceptualisation,
But it would only be assumption, supposition,
I’d love to know before my conclusion,
Can life really be just an illusion?
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Best Week All Year!
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I had to use the Porcelain Throne twice overnight.
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At 06:40hrs, I bounded out of bed, and I did a backwards flip. One-handedly whipped the nocturnal pouch from the day bag. Burst into song; Frank Ifield’s Wayward Wind. Did a few press-ups, and ten minutes of shadow boxing, and opened the kitchen window to yodel my greetings and best wishes to all who could hear me… Or, if you prefer the truth…
It’d been another stormy night. It must have taken me four hours to fall asleep. with his nit-picking and reminders of various mistakes and bad choices I’ve made over the years, I finally gave up his attack. I feell asleep for about an hour, sprang awake, waited for to stop trying to twist my neck off, and as he subsided, had her turn at dislocating my shoulder bone. No chance of nodding off again no matter how tired I felt, now. At 06:40hrs, I removed the night bag, and the need for the Porcelain Throne arrived. I could hardly feel the evacuation taking place. As I stood up, I couldn’t believe the amount of mass of evacuated product in the porcelain! I’ll say no more...


Made a brew of Glengettie.

Carere Ejaz called. I forgot to ask him to take off my socks. And pointed out that have only one warfarin dose left in the stock. Ejaz said sorry for being late. No bother at all. He was using buses on a Sunday.

I prepared the meal for tonight.
Large white beans, black-eyed peas, Gung Po sauce and gravy, water chestnuts, Light Soy sauce, liquid smoke, and potatoes. Heating it slowly in the crock-pot. Yes, the same again. I do like it!

More kitchen views.
Sunshine getting through.
Decent shots?

Back to the blogging.
Then onto the WP Reader.
Hoping it lets me ‘like and comment’ this time.

Carer Joe arrived. He’s bought some prescription medications, bless him. Great, I was on the last Warfarin tablet, too! Thanks!

Got the meal sorted. Took snaps of the evening view.
Amazing cloud formations

The days meal.

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May your week go frabjously,
Your hopes develop fabulously,
Your days each go unfractiously.
May your plans go flawlessly,
May your luck go favourably…
for your fancies and foibles,
Each day pass felicitously,
You avoid all that goes feudally,
Your dreams mature flawlessly,
May others greet you fondly,
And have a bit of luck, financially!
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Inchy Today: Sunday 13th April 2025

/ Inchie / 6 Comments

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What did we do when info was ungoogleable?
A history homework exam, no answer. Inexcusable!
The library was closed, and Father was unhelpful!
What date was the battle for Constantinople?
Must I guess? No, the answer must be veridical,
If I fail another exam, I’m in for some ridicule,
How can I avoid risking the vituperable?
Pray to a God or something Mystical?
Miss school? Go the doctor with summat mythical?
No, that would be naughty and cynical,
Maybe give someone a phone call?
We don’t have one; how do I sort out this puzzle?
Visit my doctor, give teacher some tarradiddle,
I’m not a good liar, I’d not be believable,
Use a phone box. Yes, I’ve got a testrill…
Don’t know anyone with a phone… Testicles!
Yes, I do. I could call Auntie Carol,
Off to the GPO box, rained poured down terrible!
Ah, no phone book was available!
I resigned myself to my fate; I was threnetical,
Walked home. The rain died down to a trickle,
Dad’s gone out and locked me out. I’m in a pickle!
My thinking was in three-dimensional!
To me, the problem was not trivial,
The rain poured again, now torrential,
Knocked neighbours door, for shelter and a natter,
No answer, so I went for a soaking wet toddle…
Got in the outside toilet, passed a traditional,
Dad came back; he got a bit physical…
But dry at last, I almost felt triumphal,
Dad said, 1453. Then hit me with his belt buckle!
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05:10hrs: After a night spent more waking than sleeping. I felt surprisingly alert and relatively active, lasting approximately one minute.
This was a first for me: I fell out of the hospital bed because I overreached to get at the nocturnal night bag, which, for some unknown reason (well, it was Glaucoma Gladys, really), I thought was leaking. I rushed to get it upright after it fell off the safety bar holder. I landed face down on my slippers and the waste basket, in a semicrumpled painful heap!
Then, as I recovered and grasped the bed to haul my gigantic body up, the quilts lost their grip, and there I was on the floor again, covered by the outer quilt and face down this time. I stayed there for a while to get my bearings and breath back. Then, after doing some deep breathing, I set about mountaineering my way up onto the bed. Either I had a seizure or else, inconceivably, I’d got up onto the bed and was sitting there safely, in two minutes! This couldn’t be right. How did I do that so quickly, and I may add, almost painlessly to boot? Had I just dreamt these events? No, the bent waste basket was in sight. Now, put it in the waste chute. Tsk!
Then the aches from the bruised arm, and I went into a clearly identified seizure, which I think lasted for five minutes or so. I needed a little longer doing nothing, which I did. Incredulously, I did not feel depressed or angry with myself. I decided to get the ablutions done ASAP and apply some Phorpain gel to the cartilages, back, and neck afterwards. It sounded logical to me. .

I got sidetracked from my plans as soon as I went to check the kitchen for running taps, open doors, or left-on stoves. They were all as they should be.
This morning, the moon was much smaller and had lost its red/orange tinge. Kodak Tim 2 was used to take these snaps of the planet. They are not as good as yesterday’s, which were not as good as the day before.

Well, these went well overall! There were just two nicks shaving. The bowl of water I used to stand in to clean the feet was not tipped over. There were no tumbles in the wet room. And I seemed to get them done quickly—but did I? I was not rushing. The medicalisationing was not so successful. Because I could not reach my back to put the ointment on the bruises, Acne or eczema on my back. I’ll ask the carer, to Med Hydrhelp when he comes. As usual, the worst medicating bit was applying and rubbing in the stinging ointment . Not that it bothered me, of course. Ahem!
I got the pain gel cream on   and .

Duties.
Trotsky Terence had an even greater bearing on this morning’s evacuation. Phoo! The stink almost overpowered me. Soft yet sticky and smelly. Karki coloured. Eurgh!

Another of the mysteries of Woodthorpe Court, with the hobgoblins, spectres, gnomai, phantasms, ailments, seizures, Glaucoma Gladys, Peripheral Neropathy, dying neurotransmitters, grotesque succubae, Whoopsiedangleplops, ailments, extraterrestrials, ectoplasms, spirits, Accifauxpas, rent increases, food price hikes, and the Fata Morganas, that have been sent to taunt, is how I recovered so well after the two tumbles?
Feeling alright again now. The bruises and back pain are bothering me, but nothing is serious.

I made myself my first mug of Glengettie tea since last Thursday. I’ve never gone three days without a brew of tea since I’ve been here!
I noticed it was only 07:20 on the clock calendar, which matched the computer’s. 
However, how did I get everything sorted out, abluted and on the computer so quickly?

Carer Arhem arrived as I was about to hoover the hallway. (It never got done!)
The lad put on my diabetic socks, issued the prescription medications, and reminded me of the vitamin B12 tablet. We chatted for a minute or two, as best we could, and then he did an Alert Alarm Battery Check with the NCC Control. We said our “Taras,” literally. I explained what it meant a week ago, and he uses it every call now. Bless him. He’s a lovely lad.

Keeps visiting for shorter periods but more often today, uo to now anyway. , and were regular, and the were more active than ever

I took this shot through the balcony doors. 
Then, the fatigue hit me earlier in the day than ever.
It might be connected to the tumbles. I still can’t understand how I’m not in worse condition. I’m not complaining, mind you. Oh, no! I am more tired than ever. I have to just stop.

Never got back on the computer again today.
I’ll try to catch up tomorrow.
Not good this.
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All The Best, Folks!

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Inchy Today: Wednesday, 9th April 2025

/ Inchie / 8 Comments

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ME & MY MATE ARTHUR
We’d go out every Friday night to the Astoria,
Do the twist, jive, waltz, especially with Nora,
That’s when the fallout came with Arthur,
You see Arthur dated with Dora,
I often entwined with Nora,
One night, I caught Arthur & Nora,
Arthur sounded like he was having a dyschezia,
Nora was calling out, Oh, yer, Oh Yer!!!
Arthur dismounted; I gave him a right-hander!
The scrap was a blockbuster, a bloodletter,
With Nora’s support, he fought better…
Bigger than me, and a blacksmith’s welder,
Arthur finished me off; the bounder,
Giving me several cuts and pyrexia,
I was comforted by Dora later,
Dora was a uranographer,
I mapped the soul & body of her,
Then stopped Friday night visits to the Astoria!
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Today was my busiest for months.
It is now 16:00 hrs, and I am shattered, tired, worn out, and weary. Glaucoma, Gladys, is affecting my eyesight, as usual. Here is a quick rundown on how I got into this dilapidated state! Hope I can stay awake long enough to get my ablutions and medicalisationings done. And the nurse has not shown up yet – possibly due to my putting the appointment in the calendar for the wrong day, and it should have been tomorrow.

I didn’t wake until 06:00 hrs again, but I did not get to sleep until 02:00hrs. There were fewer waking-ups with neck jerks.

I got the waste bags sorted out and placed near the door. Not knowing for 100% that the nurses would be arriving, I did not do the ablutions, or body medicationing, in case I missed the intercom. Then I handwashed some more socks and hung them above the sink to drip dry. Then, I utilised the Porcelain Throne.
This time, with Constipated Conrad still in charge. The evacuated product came out slowly and painfully, but all in one long, even bigger than the frequent Torpedo. It was more the size of a submarine! Gignormous!
Not messy whatsover!

Carer Ahram arrived. We left the bandage on the leg so the nurse could examine it when she arrived.

I got the kaghoule handwashed (made a mess on the floor ringing & ringing) and hung it on the shower rail in the wet room to drip dry. Painfully!

An email from Amazon said the delivery would arrive today before 21:20hrs. I concentrated on getting as much of the blog caught up with before the nurses arrived or the second Carer.

MISTAKE MADE HERE… WELL, TWO!
Firstly, I spilt water on the floor while handwashing and walked it all over the kitchen, so I thought I’d mop it up. I had a visit from Lost-Balance-Bernard and kicked the bucket, redistributing the dirty water back onto the floor! So, so I thought I’d mop it up again.
Second, I could see the sun coming around, ready to blast through the window, so I decided to hang the thin dressing gown on the rail to protect my eyes.
I knocked a jar of mint sauce off of the shelf, and it broke as it hit the just-mopped-twice floor, catching and seasoning the bandaged & right leg en route!
I was livid with myself!
I believe I was praying and cursing at the same time as having to mop the floor for a third time. My EQ knew something. I swear he laughed at me!

Carer ‘Joe’ arrived as I was cleaning the oven.
He’d got an extra hour today, so he could do the laundry and make space in the front room, as I had been taking tumbles & knocks lately. Damned decent of him. While he was down taking the laundry, I went to check some dates on the food.
MISTAKE MADE HERE…
I dropped a bottle again. I thought I’d mop it up. Gragknangles! Four damned times now!

‘Joe’ started making some room between the chair and my bed so I would be in less danger and bother using them.

He then went down to collect the laundry and helped hang it up with me. We went into the kitchen for something—ah, yes, food date checks! I wobbled a little and knocked a jug of water over.
Gragknangles! Five Ruddy Times Today!
‘Joe’ to the rescue; he took over, bless him!

I was embarrassed, but ‘Joe’ was understanding and calm about things. A nice, helpful chap.

He hoovered where we (well, he) had been sorting things out in the space-making mission.

I then realised that the kaghoule and dressing gown I had on had got soaked on the laf spillage episode. So had to change into a fresh one of each. And then had to hadwach for a third tine today. To wash another kaghoule!

He said he’d be doing the teatime call later on.

I felt begraggled, bewitched & bewildered!

A delivery and possibly a nurse to come yet!
I must keep going if I can. I dare not fall asleep and miss the nurse of delivery. Fed-Up!

I pondered my position and constant bad luck.
I’ve decided that I deserve no better. Will is just as well because I’m not going to have things get any better, now am I? 

Maybe it’s something I did in a previous life?
I was born as Hitler committed suicide!
Maybe I ought belatedly to run for Prime Minister?
Oh, no, we’ve already got Herr Starmer.

As tired as I was, and I know I was tired.
Cause today had drained me.
But thanks to Carer Joe and his amazing help given to me today, I got more clearing up done than for years!
A big thank you is warranted!

I settled after washing the pots up and sat in the recliner from the c1966 second—or third-hand Charity shop bought £300, broken down, catheter tube crunching, dried blood covered, grotty, dirty, and creaking recliner. Expecting to nod off quickly.
But, no! So, I put the TV on. This usually works. 
But no! Then the doubts came over me again: Had I left any taps running? I’m so glad I checked. The taps were all off—but what a view from the kitchenette window! I hastened to fetch Kodak Tim Two from the other room and almost rushed back before the view changed. I loved this one. At last, a decent photo!
Bootiful!

I went back to the front room and somehow manipulated my tired limbs and aching body onto the hospital bed. It took a while to get it into the optimum position, but once I found it, glorious sleep came at last! It was a little broken but still far less than of late.

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A Darned busy but productive day!
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I wish you each lots of luck!

Inchy: Tuesday, 8th April 2025

/ Inchie / 3 Comments

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Helpful Note: A shilling was 12d=1/ – now 5p

In my morning slumber, I started musing,
Back to the day when things were amusing,
1963, when sliced bread went up to a shilling,
The reaction of the shoppers were chilling,
They brought some; some they were stealing,
A near riot, on price-rise day proceedings,
Last week, the loaf cost me £1 – shocking!
This week, £1.49! Not reassuring!
Maybe I’ll take up shoplifting.

The monthly cost for gas & electricity…
I’m back talking again of 1963,
Cost 15/- the equivalent then to 75p,
Last month, my payment went up to £423!
Starmer’s stopped our winter fuel subsidy,
Not enough cash for price rises absorbability,
Proletariats, pensioners now in poverty,
Rates, rents, power, costs rising steeply,
Our NHS crumbles, pleasing the oligarchy.

Forcing some to turn to crime, effectively
Eat or heat, food banks, charities competing,
A diet of bread & water? It’s called Xerophagy,
At today’s price of bread & water, it’s alarming!
Families, children and the aged geriatrically,
Is Starmer not aware of the voters’ suffering?
Go shopping today, do it vigilantly,
They’ll be muggers, pickpockets lurking,
Nutters, looking to act adversarially.
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Hand Washing.
I’m fed up with this!

Ankles, lower legs much clearer today.

Afternoon kitchen shot.,
THe ankles started the electric shock going later.
Carer Ahram out some cream on and leg bandage,
I can take it off Wed’ when the nurse arrives.

Sorry, not much on today; it’s been a borrowing Tuesday. The prospects for Wed & Thursday are worse than today. I’m not sure of the days, but between Wed & Thursday:
Nurse Caroline ♥ Is calling to do another upgraded Dementia Test.
A DVT Nurse ♥ is calling for extra blood for further tests. The Warfarin INR is dangerously low at 1.6.
The district nurse ♥ is calling to check on my leg lesions and the acne-eczema.
The Urology Nurse ♥ is due to visit to alternate the catheter bag.
I’ve got two deliveries expected between noon and 22:00 hours. Medical & food.
Carer ‘Joe’ is doing the laundry. After that, I have to get the two airers out to dry the washing.

It is late Wednesday morning now.
I’m not looking forward to today.

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TTFN
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Inchy: Monday, 7th April 2025

/ Inchie / 6 Comments

LIBERTY-GLOBAL-OLIGARCHS?
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Let’s delve into the truth of ‘Hope’, clinically,
To see if it developed from ampullosity,
‘Hope’ to me seems somewhat bizarrerie,
Because finding it is hard for me…
I don’t act belligerently or truculently,
I’m a ditherer, I don’t act confidently,
My Carer say’s I’ve got too much benignity,
I think I’m shy, nervous and cowardly,
There I go off the subject again, you see?
I’ll try to concentrate more, hopefully…
‘Hope’, to me, seems to be, hypothetically,
A forlorn dream, with no reality…
I thought ‘Hope’ would help Inchy,
But I forgot about his mental instability,
His? I’m him! Another drift from verity,
I still want ‘Hope’ & help regardlessly,
Although I see the pointless futility,
Sometimes I consider ‘Hope’, frivolously,
The next time, maybe negatively,
Then back to frustration & hostility,
Yet I still try so desperately…
Then I go all unenthusiastically,
Depression falls, I turn apathetically…
A seizure, a giving way from Cartilage Chloe,
The coming arrival of complacently,
And I ‘Hope’ for ‘Hope’, pessimistically,
Body & mind acting chaotically,
Ménière’s Mini-seizures, increasingly,
I think I must not lose hope, glibly…
I even turned for help to quixotry!
As if to prove my eccentricity,
Or maybe that ought to be docility?
My physical ailments seem a triviality,
Finding ‘Hope’ & help, surely unrealistically,
The Lord made my life qualificatory…
A body and mind, deformed & queachy,
Doomed; never be happy or peachy,
I have had luck! But only quadrennially,
I acted rightly & astutely, well, in 1953,
I’m more hopeful for my sempiternity…
Not knowing where or when, for eternity,
Pray, please, no return ticket awaitingly!
If I find ‘Hope,’ will it also make me lucky?
Finding ‘Hope’, I try so persistently…
‘Hope’, is it mythical? It’s beyond me!
Why is it such a mystery to me?
Is ‘Hope’ biodegradable and sugar-free?
Why is it issued unequally, unfairly?
I can’t get any ‘Hope’, that’s a certainty,
No ‘Hope’ within by boundaries, locality,
I live in la-la land despondently…
And a part-reality, customarily,
Like others ‘Hope’ seeking, despondently,
I collect bills and demands; it’s called scripophily,
Carer Joe sorts them out for me weekly,
No offers of hope delivered to Inchy…
Finding ‘Hope’ may help propitiatingly,
‘Hope’ I get it before my necropsy!
Sorry about this Ode’s nugacity,
Call on me, & we’ll have a mug of tea,
Ice cream and/or chocolate biscuits…
I’d love a chinwag, mischievously!
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Got yesterday’s nosh photo to go on!
Well, I think it was.
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I didn’t rise until gone 0630hrs this morning. I’d had a long sleep again, broken, but not all that often. I reckon I got six hours in, and that was on the incommodious, uncomfortable, cumbrous, toe-curling, cringe-making, second or third-hand bought from the Oxfam Charity shop, Cathleen-Catheter-Tube-Crushing, hurtful for Harold’s Haemorrhoids, germ-ridden, horrendously grungy, uncomfortable, not-working recliner.
I felt a little perky when I got up and decided to clear the waste bins, etc. I
pictured & emptied the night bag. U6 rating.
Took a snap of the morning view out of the kitchenette window. I was hit by another of the odd seizures where I knew what was happening, but I was unsure why or what.

This was followed by general confusion and an almost total lack of concentration. I coughed, bringing up phlegm, and my voice went croaky. Walking, it was not easy to keep my balance.
Carer Ahman arrived. He showed concern and again wanted to phone for an ambulance. I disuaded the lad, telling him I was going to get in the bed as soon as he finished. I assured him I’d use the alarm wristlet if things didn’t improve after I’d had a kip. I’m sure we spoke of other things, but not what about? He put my diabetic socks on and gave me the medications. I got into bed while he was doing his report on his mobile phone. He also shut the curtains for me as the light in the room annoyed me for some reason. Ahman said I was not talking clearly but mumbling more; I think he said the same Sunday morning. I genuinely hope that this is not going to happen each morning. A third time, and I will have to press the alarm. I do not have the foggiest idea why this waking up and fading is happening. At least it didn’t last for long.

I bade him thanks and cheerio and settled in the bed, adjusting the settings to ensure I was not lying too flat. Comfort arrived. Yes, I did nod off for a short while. Waking up without any neck, shoulder, or leg jerkings. That in itself was nice! I was under the impression that I’d slept for a few hours because I was feeling so much better now. The wall clock told me I’d only slept for half an hour, but it did the trick.
I wasted no time in taking advantage. I went to take another kitchen window photo and used the speed mop to clean the disgustingly dirty kitchenette floor—I hope I’ve not left it sticky again. Then, I took another snap of the late morning view.

I spent ages trying to get the photos on the blog and got most of them on, but it took an aeon!

My beloved tree copse, looking thin still.
Close up of the battling for life leaves.
Even closer & higher, the crows
have not arrived yet?

Much to my amazement, Carer Joe arrived. It was already 13:25hrs! So, I assume that

Arithmaphobia Arnold had me fooled again. Maybe I’d had some non-epileptic seizures? I can’t remember having them. 
Peptac issued, I was thinking of asking for a Codeine, but with Anne Gyna being minimal bother at that time, I didn’t want to give her an excuse to kick off with her mobile stabbing pains, which make breathing a little overheavy, painful & hard work.
The unsteadiness of my balance was lingering but slowly getting less frequent. The froggy-sounding voice remains, but none of the serious stuff.

I wondered if I’d gone into the kitchen with Kodak-Tim-2 to snap the incredible view while the floor was still wet. I went to check. Now I really was confused. It must have been many hours ago when I mopped it up; there is no chance it could still be wet. What a plonker! Still, I took another shot at the pathway I could no longer get into Woodthorpe Park. Spit!

However, now things were getting better, not the croaking voice. Anne Gyna had belatedly started greeting me with her roving pains and breathing botherations. However, my dizziness and balance had improved, and I found myself singing.

Great Balls of Fire! What’s going on here?
Where have I been? What was I doing?
It’s nearly 20:00hrs already!

The Carer will be here anytime now, over the next hour or so, and I’ve not had anything to eat or done the ablutions or medicalisations yet! 
How can this be happening?

Skin on chips, a vegetable and no-meat meat pastie, pickled chestnuts & mushrooms, two wholemeal rolls to make chip butties out of, and salt & vinegar, pepper and  Soya BBQ sauce. (A little too hot for me… anybody fancy a bottle?)

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Chow!
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Inchy: Saturday, 5th April 2025

/ Inchie / 4 Comments

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I had a vision, a flash-forwarded,
It left me feebleminded,
The future was highlighted…
I can’t say I was delighted,
Like when I was trothplighted,
I was tickled and enraptured,
A glimpse of the future I captured,
I saw it on the chessboard…
Then, in the clues of a crossword,
A black rook that waved its sword…
Lands attacked, the vision-clouded,
Those not killed hid or cowered,
The Black King felt empowered,
The landscape, already cratered…
Peace talks are being avoided…
Countries being taken and bisected,
Civilians, children, killed, mutilated,
The fear, the dying, unalleviated,
Families scattered & separated…
Water and power, both disconnected,
The Killing increased, transcended,
We’ll never see wars ended,
Pleas for peace go unrequited,
Those in need are just pitied,
Oligarchs increase profit illicitly,
Supplying arms to each party…
I am sick of this violence, sadly,
I hate the warmongers’ peccability,
East & West spout paradoxicality,
It needs one leader with precocity,
Before we all die prematurely,
Did the Bible-writers, they were many,
Suffer from psychomancy?
Our chances of survival are dicey!
Will Jesus return to set us free?
If so, he’ll need to show I.D.
Or he’ll get deported, surely?
Creating humankind was to me…
The creators Whoopsiedangleplopski!
Hope I’ve not wrote owt incriminatory!
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I moved into the circa 1966, £300 Oxfam charity shop-bought, wincingly grotty, beige-coloured, crumb-covered from my nocturnal nibblings, itch-making, uncomfortable, positively unhealthy, and dangerous, no longer operational, virus-breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, catheter-tube-trapping, leg bandages loosening, recliner last night.
Well, at about 03:00hrs this morning.
I’d been getting myself in a proper pickle, making the photos safe for publishing. I got one on, and that was a terrible one.
I got the above graphics to go on. It took me hours. It just won’t take them at all now. A Monster Depression dawned, and I’m at my lowest point in memory. But things got worse…
I gave up and closed the computer.

I snapped the morning view I can’t use and put the kettle on to brew tea. The food was due to arrive, so I took all the bags, including the ones currently stacked near the door, to the waste chute. No problems, although started her tour of my torso routine. Not long after returning to the flat, and as I was cleaning the mug… The Carer arrived, and the second he came in, I sank into a state of… I don’t know what to call it; I started sneezing and coughing, neck and back pains came on, and a brand-new form  kept coming and throwing all out of sync. I coughed a little blood at one time into the tissue. I think that was from gums or teeth, though. The young Carer was concerned, but he carried on, and I told him I was not up to tackling the catheter day pouch change at the moment, which I really wasn’t. Carer Ahram put my diabetic socks on and checked to ensure I had the panic alarm on my wrist. Talk about being foggy-brained, yet I recalled all this on the notepad!

A few hours later, he returned for the second call and volunteered to change the catheter day pouch. He did a decent job of it, too. By the time the lad left, my chesty coughing had eased and lessened, and the neck pain had eased, and Akram checked the taps as he departed.  
ARRGH!
I left the hot tap running, so that kyboshed my idea of doing the ablutions until tonight, when the night heater starts working.

Then I became seriously depressed, deeply. I felt I could not cope and wasn’t too bothered about carrying on. I openly beg someone to help me with the computer again.
The trouble is that I can no longer understand written instructions and don’t know any computer jargon, and I’m getting increasingly confused. 
Particularly with my stupidly leaving the hot water tap on again. I think I’m doing this more often than last week. The nurse may have come while I was out at the Audio Clinic, and I missed her. On the other hand, there are 2/1 odds that I will put the appointment down for the wrong day and/or week, and she might be calling next week. Then again, there’s a possibility that I dreamed of getting the telephone call saying she was visiting me to carry out another dementia test. What do I know!

I thought I’d added a photo to the file, and my spirits uplifted, I tried again with the other images.
Then I realised—I think this photo was from yesterday—that the thought of a photoless blog brought back the temporarily departed depression.

I decided to have an early meal, so half-heartedly. I realised it was already 17:00 hrs. I know I’ve spent hours and hours failing to get the photos to save.
Maybe the seizures did affect me differently and were from the ?

Not feeling right at all. This feels like something different to the usual collection of ailments.

I tried to stay awake to watch the football highlights of the day. I failed!

Another broken night’s sleep, but it was much longer. I must have had 5 hours of sleep!

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Beware of Oligarchs!
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Inchy Today: Wednesday 2nd April 2025 Audio Clinic

/ Inchie / 10 Comments

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>>>>><<<<<
Let’s see what’s on today’s agenda…
If allowed to by my aprosexia,
First, try to avoid anoxia,
Getting worked up into dysphoria,
Ignore my graphomania,
Prepare for the hereinafter,
Get through the pain of my dyschezia!
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A speedo or an accelerometer,
I’d call it a speedometer,
But unsafe speeding; I’m an abnegator,
I’d sooner get there later,
Not in hospital on a ventilator,
Not that this is exactly ataraxia,
The food is not exactly ambrosia!
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I was born with things homuncular,
And misshaped things testicular,
It didn’t bother me particular,
It did later, howsomdever,
Girls interested in my hylomania,
They drove me into habromania,
Now I use a haemacytometer!
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Soon, henceforth-in future,
As I get more ancienter,
I meet more with the Grim Reaper,
Not like the expected harbinger,
He’s no shyster, or defrauder,
Just a long-dead, soul collector,
Trying to make your death pleasanter!
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I take-not in anything jentacular,
Porridge, cornflakes, grits, Ergh!
I was told not to by a medical advisor,
He was found to be a drug-abuser,
He became the prison beekeeper…
I don’t understand either!
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WEDNESDAY, 2nd APRIL 2025
I had even fewer jumping awakes last night.
Thought Storming Steve was the culprit for the majority of these almost nightmarish events. Although the tormenting, mocking, blame-apportioning flood of self-abuses and guilty past actions were vivid in my mind each time I was woken up, they faded swiftly, in time for me to regain my state of slumber. TSS started over with, I think, different bits of guilt-giving and blame over my past errors & bad choices.

After sorting the waste bags and getting the night catheter removed and classified as a ‘5’ on the NHS scale, I went through the same things I had yesterday when preparing for the Audio Clinic lift, which I’m sure will come today.
Ablutions and medicationalisings are done. I was on the computer when the Caregiver arrived. He issued the prescription medications. I had to ask him for Peptac, and Ahram used some Porpain Gel on the right catheter, which had given way on me while Ahram was here. He got the socks on for me and asked me if I needed the shoes on, which I did.  
A good job that he remembered!

The computer allowed me to save the top two graphics and nothing else.

I checked the bag I was taking with myself; everything seemed to be there. Then, I visited the Porcelain Throne and checked the contents of the three-wheeled walker again. I will have to add my reading glasses.

I got readied and entered the ground floor foyer with the three-wheeled walker.
I met my friend Jenny’s other half there and chatted about old age. We found we had many similar annoying age-related problems. Haha!

A little late, but not a lot—merely a few minutes—the EasyLink minibus arrived with no trousers on to make access to the catheter bag easy. As I went through the door, the wind blasted up my privates something awful. Hehehe!
An accident had delayed the lad. He got me up the lift and settled in, but I only had my last tenner to pay him, and he had no change. So, he told me to pay for both journeys when I got picked up at 13:00 hrs. We had to go to West Bridgford and were taken to the same place. The traffic was delayed due to road works in West Bridgford.
I went inside the waiting room and waited. 
But once I registered, I was summoned in a short while. I went to the treatment room with a pretty young Asian girl who could not easily understand my Nottingham accent. She got both hearing aids working again within ten minutes or so. She changed the tubing on them, and now it sounds like everyone is shouting at me. Har-Har!

I’d got an hour before the pick-up time. Luckily, I’d taken the crossword book and a pen with me.
I snuggled into a chair and fell asleep!
At one point, I mentioned my many nodding offs to a receptionist if she had seen anyone with an EasyLift uniform on. She hadn’t.
But I dare not sit down again. I saw the sunshine through the door windows and decided it would be safer and less chance of missing the lift if I went outside to wait for EasyLift. I’d only got twenty minutes or so to wait. The bus arrived after 40 minutes of wind blowing anywhere and everywhere it could, and the catheter was filling up later.

There was another accident in the City Centre, and buses were rerouted.
The driveress did a grand job of getting me back to the flats. I was a little worried because Carer Joe said earlier that he would call at 0130hrs when I should be back by then.
After parking, paying the bill and getting off the bus, Joe approached us. Very understanding, he half-expected us to be late with the news about the accidents and road works on the news.

He took the laundry down and put it in the washer. He then returned to the flat and checked an email I was dubious of.
Joe started sorting out the junk room one. He got a lot done in half an hour. He went down to collect the laundry from the dryer, pointing out that he’d have to bring it up part-wet because he’d done his time. I asked him to leave it and that I’d fetch it later. “Don’t Forget To!” he said. With the hearing aids now working, I heard him.

Amazingly, I remembered to. The sad part is that not one was allowed to go on file of all the photos I took in the laundry room. There is definitely Something Wrong Here!

I pressed on with the day’s blog.

Then, I hand-washed a Khagoule and hung it to drip dry from a coathanger in the wet room. But I made the mistake of forgetting I’d put the heater on to help it dry. I did, but that was hours later and a few quid less in my pocket! Humph! Thanks to Starmer stopping we pensioners’ fuel allowance and allowing power charges to go up by 40% since he cheated and lied his way into office!

Suddenly, it was almost time for Joe to make his teatime call. I was getting hungry now. But I’ll wait until the chap calls. I think I’ll have a microwave meal and some bread to fill me up. Or maybe choose the much-loved potato cakes and a vegetable pastie.

I doubt I can use the photo, but I’ll try again tonight with the potato cakes and vegetable pasty.

Back in the morning, I hope.

Back with the bad news of the potato cakes and vegetable pasty feast…
Depressed, sick & tired of bothering to do anything, but why, you ask (I hope), I’ll tell and show you…

I put the feast in the oven to cook for 25 minutes and returned to shut down the computer, which promptly seized up on me and granted me a blue screen of death! It took me a lot of time, over three hours, to toy with the unknown and risk getting it back running. I do not know what I was doing, but it worked after I rebooted. I had to sign into everything again and check on CorelDraw to find that most photos had magically disappeared again!
Anny Gyna gave me her first nasty attack of the day… and as I was searching for the mended hearing aids to put in…
I became aware of the burning and a little smoke entering the room.
The food had dried hard & mega-crispy.
When I squeezed one of the potato cakes, it turned into a little stack of black crumbs!
Very disappointed with myself. My self-lambasting and lousy language flowed. I wanted to spit!

I got a Sweet & Sour ready meal from the freezer and microwaved it.
I ate it with some slices of Milk Roll Bread and dunked it in the sauce. Which were the highlights of the meal.

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Thanks everyone!
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Inchy Today: Tuesday 1st April 2025

/ Inchie / 11 Comments

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I’ve no claims to anything academical,
I’m interested in anything apodeictical,
Like the ancient Greek philosopher Aristotle,
Some claim that he used to hit the bottle,
I used to drink a lot, being self-critical,
The only trait we share? Being alcoholical,
But I can auger, but not astrological,
My success rate is astronomical,
I see this world is not ameliorable,
I know why Starmer is amerceable,
Takes backhanders, is unprosecutable,
His promises are agathokakological,
His cohorts are also not punishable,
As they appease the Oligarchical,
I seek words that are encourageable,
Proletariats are now extirpable…
MP’s morals uncouth, aethereal,
They lie, seek self-profit & teazle,
HMGs are foxy, furtive, deceitful,
Slithery, snidey, sidestepping, hurtful,
They should be accusable and arrestable,
Indeed, are they executionable?
Has HMG been proven unreliable?
Who takes over? That’s questionable!
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I had the usual broken sleep, but at least this time, it was broken far fewer times, and I got four½ and a half hours! I was too late to complete the ablutions before the Asda delivery arrived. 
I collated the things that I needed to take to the Audio Clinic and visited the Porcelain Throne. It was a messy! Trotsky Terence affair.

06:20hrs: I checked emails to confirm the timing of the order. 0700 > 0800hrs.

So, I got the computer to start this blog. Soon kicked off, as is typical when I am in a ‘feeling the pressure mode’ over the clinic lifts and appointments. Foggy-Brained!

GC Trolley indoorsI’m not sure when the Caregiver will arrive, but I hope he will be here for the delivery to help get it in. Then I can store it away. And get on with the hurried ablutions, medicalisationings, and risky job of getting the trousers on. I’ll get the things to take into the three-wheel-wheeled-walker while I think of it.
I must get down in the lobby at 10:30hrs so as not to miss the lift, which may come early or late, depending on how many others they have to pick up and drop off en route.

The carer arrived as I was taking in the Asda food.
After I’d got all the bags in the kitchen, I joined the Caregiver, who put the medications and socks on. Then, as I was going out, I asked him to help me put on the trousers and shoes.

Pretty colours this morning

Asda delivery

Ready-made meals (Almost)

I got the Carer’s & Nurses nibbles & drinkies topped up on the table and cabinet.

The computer stopped allowing me to upload photos. I had to delete the few I’d not put on and clean the drive with cCleaner again. I’ll try later when I get back from the Audio Clinic. That was the plan!

It was a heck of a rush getting the stand-up wash, shave, and medications done. I flapped a bit, getting all the paperwork and the list of things I needed to take with me. I checked the EasyLink lift.

On the way down to the foyer to await the lift, I dropped some bits off in appreciation of the help Jenny and Frank have so often given me on their floor. I went down in the lift, worrying if I’d forgotten to take anything. I got seated in the chair and got the camera out as I checked the bag of things in the trolley-walker. 10:15hrs, plenty of time.
They have replaced the stolen wall clock. It has fancy smaller figures, but I’d had my wristwatch on.

Almost straight away, I found myself fighting off the closing eyelid. The tiredness and fatigue were back!
I’m sure I nodded off momentarily a good few times. But at least when the driver comes to the foyer door, she/he will see me even if I’d nodded off.
But the frequency worried me; I really was struggling to stay awake. Likely it was the comfort of the chair that I wasn’t used to, having to use the £300 second-hand shop-bought, c1966, moth-eaten, bedraggled, grotty, cringingly beige-coloured, much-dilapidated, crumb-containing from my nocturnal nibblings, bug-ridden, itch-inspiring, not-working recliner.

I was concerned that I may have nodded for a little longer than I thought; I may have missed the driver from EasyLink. Guilt raised its ugly head.
I waited until I should have been starting the appointment, realising that I must have made a faux pas or they had trouble getting a driver. Not knowing, I decided to believe that I must have made a Whoopsiedangleplop. And  ! This turned me swiftly into a curmudgeonly grump!
I walked along the connecting passageway to Winwood Court in case they (EasyLink) called at the wrong block of flats. Nope!
Back misrably to the flat amidst the depression, self-lambasting, and the catheter bag getting overfull!

I sorted out the waste from the earlier delivery and got the bags down the waste chute.

I decided to prep the meal for the microwave later: Colcanon mash, minced beef, gravy, carrots, peas, and water chestnuts. I put it in the fridge. I also turned on the computer to keep this blog up to date. I hoped the phone would ring to clarify whatever mistake I’d made. It did!

Frustrated, Depressed & Self-Loathing…
CONFUSED! – HAD ENOUGH!
I can’t take any more of these problems!
ARITHMAPHOBIA TO BLAME, this time!

What happened, as I see it.

The pleasant lady from EasyLink telephoned to confirm that Wednesday’s lift to the Audio clinic was pick-up at 10:25 and lift back at 13:00 hrs!
When I checked the timings yesterday, I must have been the arithmaphobia. I’d already got it down for Wednesday but got mentally entangled with the digits again.
So, I’ve got all this to do again in the morning!
This sounds scary to me, actually.

I got the meal cooked and eaten.

Lightened a smidge, but I was so annoyed at myself!

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ALL THE BESTEST!
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