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Let’s see what’s on today’s agenda…
If allowed to by my aprosexia,
First, try to avoid anoxia,
Getting worked up into dysphoria,
Ignore my graphomania,
Prepare for the hereinafter,
Get through the pain of my dyschezia!
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A speedo or an accelerometer,
I’d call it a speedometer,
But unsafe speeding; I’m an abnegator,
I’d sooner get there later,
Not in hospital on a ventilator,
Not that this is exactly ataraxia,
The food is not exactly ambrosia!
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I was born with things homuncular,
And misshaped things testicular,
It didn’t bother me particular,
It did later, howsomdever,
Girls interested in my hylomania,
They drove me into habromania,
Now I use a haemacytometer!
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Soon, henceforth-in future,
As I get more ancienter,
I meet more with the Grim Reaper,
Not like the expected harbinger,
He’s no shyster, or defrauder,
Just a long-dead, soul collector,
Trying to make your death pleasanter!
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I take-not in anything jentacular,
Porridge, cornflakes, grits, Ergh!
I was told not to by a medical advisor,
He was found to be a drug-abuser,
He became the prison beekeeper…
I don’t understand either!
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WEDNESDAY, 2nd APRIL 2025
I had even fewer jumping awakes last night.
Thought Storming Steve was the culprit for the majority of these almost nightmarish events. Although the tormenting, mocking, blame-apportioning flood of self-abuses and guilty past actions were vivid in my mind each time I was woken up, they faded swiftly, in time for me to regain my state of slumber. TSS started over with, I think, different bits of guilt-giving and blame over my past errors & bad choices.
After sorting the waste bags and getting the night catheter removed and classified as a ‘5’ on the NHS scale, I went through the same things I had yesterday when preparing for the Audio Clinic lift, which I’m sure will come today.
Ablutions and medicationalisings are done. I was on the computer when the Caregiver arrived. He issued the prescription medications. I had to ask him for Peptac, and Ahram used some Porpain Gel on the right catheter, which had given way on me while Ahram was here. He got the socks on for me and asked me if I needed the shoes on, which I did.
A good job that he remembered!
The computer allowed me to save the top two graphics and nothing else.
I checked the bag I was taking with myself; everything seemed to be there. Then, I visited the Porcelain Throne and checked the contents of the three-wheeled walker again. I will have to add my reading glasses.
I got readied and entered the ground floor foyer with the three-wheeled walker.
I met my friend Jenny’s other half there and chatted about old age. We found we had many similar annoying age-related problems. Haha!
A little late, but not a lot—merely a few minutes—the EasyLink minibus arrived with no trousers on to make access to the catheter bag easy. As I went through the door, the wind blasted up my privates something awful. Hehehe!
An accident had delayed the lad. He got me up the lift and settled in, but I only had my last tenner to pay him, and he had no change. So, he told me to pay for both journeys when I got picked up at 13:00 hrs. We had to go to West Bridgford and were taken to the same place. The traffic was delayed due to road works in West Bridgford.
I went inside the waiting room and waited.
But once I registered, I was summoned in a short while. I went to the treatment room with a pretty young Asian girl who could not easily understand my Nottingham accent. She got both hearing aids working again within ten minutes or so. She changed the tubing on them, and now it sounds like everyone is shouting at me. Har-Har!
I’d got an hour before the pick-up time. Luckily, I’d taken the crossword book and a pen with me.
I snuggled into a chair and fell asleep!
At one point, I mentioned my many nodding offs to a receptionist if she had seen anyone with an EasyLift uniform on. She hadn’t.
But I dare not sit down again. I saw the sunshine through the door windows and decided it would be safer and less chance of missing the lift if I went outside to wait for EasyLift. I’d only got twenty minutes or so to wait. The bus arrived after 40 minutes of wind blowing anywhere and everywhere it could, and the catheter was filling up later.
There was another accident in the City Centre, and buses were rerouted.
The driveress did a grand job of getting me back to the flats. I was a little worried because Carer Joe said earlier that he would call at 0130hrs when I should be back by then.
After parking, paying the bill and getting off the bus, Joe approached us. Very understanding, he half-expected us to be late with the news about the accidents and road works on the news.
He took the laundry down and put it in the washer. He then returned to the flat and checked an email I was dubious of.
Joe started sorting out the junk room one. He got a lot done in half an hour. He went down to collect the laundry from the dryer, pointing out that he’d have to bring it up part-wet because he’d done his time. I asked him to leave it and that I’d fetch it later. “Don’t Forget To!” he said. With the hearing aids now working, I heard him.
Amazingly, I remembered to. The sad part is that not one was allowed to go on file of all the photos I took in the laundry room. There is definitely Something Wrong Here!
I pressed on with the day’s blog.
Then, I hand-washed a Khagoule and hung it to drip dry from a coathanger in the wet room. But I made the mistake of forgetting I’d put the heater on to help it dry. I did, but that was hours later and a few quid less in my pocket! Humph! Thanks to Starmer stopping we pensioners’ fuel allowance and allowing power charges to go up by 40% since he cheated and lied his way into office!
Suddenly, it was almost time for Joe to make his teatime call. I was getting hungry now. But I’ll wait until the chap calls. I think I’ll have a microwave meal and some bread to fill me up. Or maybe choose the much-loved potato cakes and a vegetable pastie.
I doubt I can use the photo, but I’ll try again tonight with the potato cakes and vegetable pasty.
Back in the morning, I hope.
Back with the bad news of the potato cakes and vegetable pasty feast…
Depressed, sick & tired of bothering to do anything, but why, you ask (I hope), I’ll tell and show you…
I put the feast in the oven to cook for 25 minutes and returned to shut down the computer, which promptly seized up on me and granted me a blue screen of death! It took me a lot of time, over three hours, to toy with the unknown and risk getting it back running. I do not know what I was doing, but it worked after I rebooted. I had to sign into everything again and check on CorelDraw to find that most photos had magically disappeared again!
Anny Gyna gave me her first nasty attack of the day… and as I was searching for the mended hearing aids to put in…
I became aware of the burning and a little smoke entering the room.
The food had dried hard & mega-crispy.
When I squeezed one of the potato cakes, it turned into a little stack of black crumbs!
Very disappointed with myself. My self-lambasting and lousy language flowed. I wanted to spit!
I got a Sweet & Sour ready meal from the freezer and microwaved it.

I ate it with some slices of Milk Roll Bread and dunked it in the sauce. Which were the highlights of the meal.
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Thanks everyone!
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At least you got a bit of a wake up call with the wind blowing up you skirt. Some days so many accidents happen. Too bad you burned youe meal got burnt to a crisp. At least you had a microwave meal on hand as a substitute.
It was almost just another day of life for me, nowadays. Why is this happening to me diurnally? Silly, question, sorry. Haha!
I think I might have enjoyed the howling wind up my lower regions, really. Reminded me of Griselda.
After the days events, burning my meal. made me so mad with myself! Tsk!
When I took the sweet & sour from the fridge, it was completely covered in side with ice, had to deice it. Hehe! Which reminded me of when I left the freezer door open last week.
Not one of best days.
Hope you are okay mate? Still producing some great poems. Cheers.
The ode a reminder that nothing is permanent or sacred.
Too true, Paul.
Thanks for reading & understanding.
Have a cider-shandy on me.
I will tomorrow, 11.03 p.m. here 🙂 so cider not the best option lol, although a whiskey maybe 🙂
Good idea. Ah, Cider at night, a sleep stealer, methinks, Paul.
Yes, Gerry, as your ode states, we all come to an end. It’s good you got your hearing-aids fixed. Keep on doing the best you can. 🙏🌞
Merci Mon Ami. Thanks. 👍🏼🙏🏻
¥ou are not alone my darling! I do that too! I get into the bathroom, and then onto a crossword -which I want to beat Sir Bill’s at so I tend to take lots of time. Then I forget I had something under the broiler and it is just ash! I also find – 0f late – when I’m doing something like a craft or changing my surgery wound – I just toss the not needed thing out of my hand to the floor! I have had to find needles on the low pile carpet in my room way too many times of late! Tonight I walked out of my room and noticed I had tossed my bandage onto the floor! I laughed and decided I will need new mental strategies to keep track of what do when I’m distracted. So you are not alone on burning your delicious looking dinner. I could not apply that to the sweet and sour. Looked like lots of sauce! Sending love my sweet!
♥ Bless you gal. We share that trait. (See Sundays blog, I’ll not finish until Monday, but these traits we share were so numerous. Hehe!
Love and kisses my Angel-Flower. 💛💛💛