Ageing humour

Inchcock Today: Wed-Thur 30-31st March 2022

/ Inchie / 9 Comments

Wednesday 30th March 2022

Morning Thoughts Ode

A difficult day to navigate…
Thoughts, intentions I miscalibrate,
Mind-freezers and blanks dominate!
Confusion, memory-blanks delay…
Getting things done in a logical way…
Clear thinking, I was refused…
All day long, I felt I was reclused…
Not to mention mightily confused!

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

05:30hrs: I stirred back into the sad world of a lonely consciousness. Dispirited, low, not fully-with-it. My thoughts were vague, ambiguous even to me, and I thought them! Hehehe! This weird feeling of solitariness must have come for a reason? Mayhaps I’d had a dream of some sort?

Hello, Mr Nice from above has started early this morning. I reckon it is something heavy he’s making today. I hope he doesn’t hurt himself too much. Ahem! Cause the clunks and thuds were louder, a lot of drilling noises followed along with the usual tap-tapping and odd thunderclap clunk, here and there later on.

Hahahahahahaha!

Carer Richard arrived. While he was doing my medications, the intercom burst forth and flashed. Thanks, Dementia Doreen! It was a J Sainsbury’s order that I thought was coming on Thursday? Hmm?

No bread was delivered, but as they pointed out, I requested no substitute. Like last time, they’d sent me potato pancakes in place of bread?

Two short date products as described on the right. The fishcakes were with use by today’s date! The salad was by tomorrow. As they say in their advert: Sainsbury’s: Helping everyone Eat better?

However, they did express that they hope I’ll be completely happy with my order, and I can return anything I’m not happy with, and I’ll get a refund within five working days! And Sainsbury’s is owned by Royalty, you know. It shows, dunnit?

Carer Richard took the boxes through into the kitchen, and I got them stored away. He also checked the dates on the stuff in the fridge for me. Finding a few items out of date, Ahem!

Richard departed, leaving a confused Inchcock, Perplexed;  ① as to how he thought they coming tomorrow, not today? ② How they could send something with a sell-by date of the same day? ③ The cream cakes were mashed up together in the box! ④ And the daffodils (Jenny and Francis treats) had petals knocked off of them! ⑤ And why had Little Inchies fungal lesion suddenly started spouting blood?

Med Hydr Off to the wet room and dug out the new ointment. This took a lot longer than expected. Cleaning things up and applying the cream was its usual painful experience. And by the time I’d finished, got new PPs on and dressed, Dizzy Dennis had joined me, and my vision was blurred for some reason?

So, I did the blood pressure to see if anything was out of sync. Well, the blood pressure was acceptable. The Pulse was a smidge high, but only a tiny bit so. The body temperature was lowish, 35°c is my target, and it was 33.7°c. Again, it was so low as to cause concern. I thought about it; what had caused this funny spell? Then gave up.

I spent hours and hours blogging, almost automatically, and now have many memory blanks. Reading my scribbled remember-it notes on the pad was impossible for hours, and I did start to get a little worried then.

I found myself sitting on the £300, c1968, second-hand, charity shop-bought, eyesorely-horrendously grungy coloured, haemorrhoid-testing, unfit-for-use, not working recliner, with the TV on? No idea? What happened during the intervening hours…

Initially, I panicked a bit, and got up, grabbed Metal Micky, and started having a search around Sherlockian style. Worried that any heat, taps (faucets), stove hobs or oven had been left on.

After a limp around, I found everything as it should be! There were no running taps, lights or heaters left on, windows closed, the cooker was cold all over to the touch, and the fridge-freezer doors shut. Plus, I was feeling a lot better in myself physically. Dizzy Dennis had departed, and my vision seemed to be normal again??? As normal as one can expect, with having cataracts, glaucoma and saccades. Even the kettles were both stone cold… that must be a first for me. I almost felt contended.

I was still mystified about where the hours had gone and what I had been doing… sleeping? Little Inchie was checked; all well, no bleeding now.

I felt hunger pangs brewing up. So off to the kitchenette and started on a had a cooking session. Noticing the beautiful evening, I got the Canon and took to picture of the blue hue of the evening.

It was turning dark quickly tonight. Ten minutes after taking the first shot, I took this second picture of the same scene.

Then I got the meal onto the plate and put the used oven tray and saucepan in the sink to soak while I ate the dinner…

I turned to put the saucepan on the draining board and gave myself one hell of toe-stubbing on the wheel of the server trolley! My language was a smidgeon blue and self derogatory in nature!

Then I missed the edge of the draining board with the saucepan, which now has a deep custom-designed dent it, as it fell off and landed right on the recently stubbed toe!

But I curbed my histrionics as the evening carer arrived. The Carer soon sorted the medications out in double time, I thanked her, and I got back and settled with the meal tray on my knee dining, and turned on the TV to watch the end of a ‘Heartbeat’ episode… regretfully, I managed neither of the planned activities!

Well, there was a single item on the J Sainsbury delivered fodder that was edible, really… Sorry, but it’s true! The cheese curls were really rock-hard outside and soft inside. The potatoes cakes had not an ounce of ant flavour or taste? The cobs were like cardboard. The fresh peas were bitter! A flavour Rating of 1/10! That was for the tasty lemon and lime cheesecake. Note To Self: Stop buying cheese curls, potato cakes, cobs, and fresh peas from J Sainsbury’s! The waste bin for 95% of that meal.

From then on, there is no sound memory of what happened. I think I slipped into sleep at about 22:00hrs and slept through until 05:40hrs… at least that’s when I woke up.

Thursday 31st March 2022

Morning Thoughts Ode

A day that I anticipate,
There will be love & hate…
But neither of them will be very great…
I’ll try to not let today aggravate,
Good and evil will alternate,
Good fortune, I’ll not wait…
Thought-Storms to circumnavigate,
Worries and fears to collate…
Naturally, I’ll remain celibate,
Sanity, hopes, health to connotate…
Daily tasks I’ll try to coordinate,
As soon as I find the time and date…
Confusion’s just an everyday trait,
Mind-blanks, make me feel desperate,
Dizzy spells, none for a while, but I await…
Saccades, Cataracts Glaucoma, eyes dilate…
My vision and hearing began to absquatulate!
At least I haven’t started to hallucinate…
Note to self: Just give it time, mate…

05:40hrs: I blinked myself awake and waited for the eyesight to clear. And realised how good I felt this morning. Well, as good as I could manage. The brain fogginess and dizzies had departed! Yee-Ha! I’d had a decent kip for once and was with it more today. How long for, I didn’t want to go into!

I decided to make use of this moment, and I rose, caught my balance, and had a hobble with Metal Micky to the wet room to get the ablutions done. I managed to get a few nicks and cuts shaving in my over-confidence, nothing serious.

The toe from last night’s stubbing and falling saucepan landing on it had left me with a new limping style. Hahaha! Yet I still gave myself a toe-stubbing on the same digit as I left the wet room, against the doorframe edge. Humph! But it was not a bad one. I got dressed, put the kettle on, and had to go back to the wet room to visit and utilise the Porcelain Throne.

CW02 No doubt about it, Constipation Conrad was in full charge of the operation this morning! It was a long time before any activity started, and when it did, an awfully long and painful input from me was needed to literally force things out! So, I had a go at the crosswording, the old book.

I was running out of time to get things done on this blog, so something had to curtail things of detail. Everything takes so much longer, ever-increasingly longer, to do with the computer. Problems with the computer, Liberty-Global Virgin Media internet going down so often, the eyes and Neuropathy Pete… now the mind-blanks making it so difficult to get anything done. And always missing errors and mistakes… Sorry.

Went to make a brew of Glengettie tea in the kitchen.

Took this photo and added the ghost skull in the window for a bit of fun later. Hahaha!

Oh, my Jimminee, what a high SYS and low Pulse I’ve got this morning. Not that I’m surprised, I sort of expected it.

But at least the body temperature was a little higher this morning, close to its official target of 35°c for once.

I heard the wind blowing outside, which goes to show how strong it must have been for me to hear it.

I had a peep out of the balcony window, and blooming heck, it was snowing. Fine thin flakes, but large ones.

I took another photo to the right, of the end car park.

Rather comforting to see red-van-man back parked on the yellow no-parking chevrons.

Took a photo (All of these were taken through the glass... too cold to stick my head outside and get the flat filled with snowflakes). Hahaha! Of the front car park on Chestnut Walk.

Snowflake was my nickname in the Meadows boxing club. I’m not sure why I bothered mentioning that?

Then a shot that showed nothing through the left-hand window in the balcony.

I went back to the computer, finished the Snippets blog, and posted it to WordPress. It was a challenging, mistake-ridden, sanity-testing affair as  I got angrier with myself for my many stupid mistakes,

The snowing stopped, leaving a thin coating that gave the bottom field an eerie look, especially for April! (Nearly) Haha!

I got the daffodils and took them first to Francis. What a farce it was as well. Got to the elevators and had a while to wait to get one. Down to the eighth floor, and as the door opened, Francis was waiting to get in, to go out. I gave her the bag with flowers and some nibbles and got out to allow Francis and a bloke to get it, so they would not be delayed and possibly miss the bus. I waited for the next lift to go back up to the ninth floor and Jenny’s.

Three times the cage arrived, but always on the way down. It would have been quicker to have gone down and come back up again. Haha! Dropped off the bag at Jenny and Franks, left some drinkies with them for Frank and Doris. ♥

Back to the flat, and the weather looked slightly different when I got in. The wind seemed to have dropped, and the snow had melted away into the earth and ether.

I opened the window and am sure I could smell petrichor as if it had been raining?

I made an order for Iceland for the following Monday. I made sure I kept to the minimum order – but of course, knowing Iceland, there will be substitutes and out-of-stock items every week. Which nay make the order under the minimum, and cost me delivery charges.

After an hour or so of computing, well, I say computing? It was more like making errors, forgetting details, getting things wrong, hitting the wrong buttons, and getting even more wee’d off! The weather changed again.

Made a start on this blog at long last. I got carried away on WordHippo, updating my words to use list… Suddenly, my mind was full of Cognitive biases and guilt. Why?

: I have what I can only call a mind-blank. After hours of sorting out the new list, I closed the notepad without saving it, and I lost the lot! I’ll not repeat my thoughts on this.

Humph! I went to make another brew. I took another wee-wee… they have been persistent again today, even though I’ve cut down on my Glengettie drinking a lot today. No, honestly!

The skies had altered again and were blue with almost white small puffer clouds.

Bootiful sky! It’s been a changeable day.

Waiting for the kettle to boil, I took a clearer photo of the Chestnut Way end car park and red-van-mans parking. Well, he’s pretty consistent; you have to give him credit!

He’s been consistent today; although I’m worried about him now, he’s gone all quiet? Maybe he’s gone to an AA meeting? Or a Masonsonic Lodge meeting? Mafia get together? Or he is having a chat with Putin?

Well, I found I’d had three official-looking letters had been delivered. These make me nervous, you know. They always require me to make phone calls without considering my deafness or Doreen’s Dementia. Nottingham City Homes, Pegasus Police and Queens Medical Centre Eye clinic – Re Cataracts assessment! Two appointments for 3rd May! Now I’ll have to find out where and how to get there. But I was generally cheered by the news.

The Nottingham City Homes was about the rent payments.

I took a half-decent shot from the kitchen window. Showing the further change in the weather… it looked so pretty now.

Being perked up a bit with the news from the hospital seemed to inspire my taste buds. So I decided, after yesterday’s pathetic meal, to make sure this would be a good one! And it was, too!

The extra crispy chips were marvellous, sprinkled with spirit vinegar and Worcester sauce. But, nothing would make the last of the fresh garden peas taste any good, but I did add a bit of sugar while cooking them – it didn’t so much. The tomatoes went down okay. Each round of the cheapo beef slices was eaten within a portion of milk roll bread. I was so keen on consuming the unostentatious meal I forgot to photograph it. So I did part-way through eating it. Oh, I did enjoy it! Flavour Rating: 8/10; I’d have given it a higher score, but for the crap tasting Kenyan peas.

Doing the washing up, I was belching with delight. Haha!

I got the camera and took these photographicalisations of the eerie but fantastic night’s view.

Made up a bottle of spring water, added a drop of orange cordial to it, and whistled to myself; as I checked on the taps (faucets), I was tickled with the actioning of help with the cataracts. Albeit not for a few weeks yet. Checked the electrics and wet room. Then, I meandered almost casually with Metal-Mickey, to the £300, second-hand, c1968, charity shop-bought, eyesorely-horrendously grungy coloured, haemorrhoid-testing, easily-falloutable, unfit-for-use, not working, recliner. My intentions were to get in with Sweet Morpheus as soon as possible…

I should have known better. The Thought-Storms erupted. They gorgonised my tired brain, tormented, teased and put me in an uneasy state of mind. I had no idea when they relaxed their onslaught, but it was gone 23:00hrs cause I put the TV on then, hoping it would help me drift off… Humph!

Have a great day, Folks!

Inchcock Today: Monday 28th March 2022

/ Inchie / 3 Comments

MONDAY 28th MARCH 2022

In Brief & Ode

Problems a few, well, really quite a load…
Accifauxpas, bleeding, no real Smug-Mode…
Noisy Herbert, getting on my goad…
Memory blanks, mistakes made? A shitload!
I had to look up my own postcode!
The Thought-Storms constantly flowed…
Wee-weeing? The bucket nearly overflowed!
Stabbed myself with a toothbrush up my nose,
Will it get worse, discommode? Nobody knows…
What evils and stupidity Satan may bestow?
I’ll have a mug of tea and a marshmallow!

Haveth a great day!

05:30hrs, the usual jumping awake, with a verbal “Uhrge!” arrived. I pondered a few seconds to check on the time, day and need to activate the brain to join the body into some form of starting.

My hazy and befuddled brain sorted itself out in a fashion, and I decided to get the sphygmomanometerisationing done first thing. The grey plastic was half-filled before I started this slash. By the time I’d escaped the c1966 recliner, the need for a wee-wee had developed. And the urine flowed and splashed at a rate and pace never known before! How I held onto the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket), I don’t know. But obviously, I had been wee-weeing throughout the night.

I still can’t work out how someone in my condition can free themselves from the recliner, take the few paces to the bucket, pass water (ferociously!) and get back down again… even once, and yet, not know he’s done it; when he wakes up? Someone must understand this. A psychologist or somebody? Which followed nearly every one of the wee-wees that followed today, and there were dozens of them! No wonder I can feel the dampness in the protection pants of the damned PMAD (Post-Micturition-After Dribbling).

There was much handling of things in washing and cleaning; poor Little Inchies’ fungal lesion started bleeding again later on. Humph!

I finally got around to taking the Blood Pressure. A fine set of figures they were too! SIA 144, DIA 48 and Pulse at 72… No, hang on. The DIA’s a good bit low… I’ll check it out.

No, that’s not too bad, only just in the red area anyway. For some reason, the low DIA brought it up overall a smidgeon. I’ve had it a lot worse than that. Last week one day, it was Sys 171, so I’m not fretting.

I used my Chinese (Hong Kong) made by Shenzhen Relee Electronic & Technology Co. Ltd™, contactless thermometer. The result was a bit higher this time, almost on the target figure of 35!

All went well, apart from the teeth cleaning, which was bloody. Thanks to ailment number eleven, Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley. As it did two days ago when she made me drop the mug of Glengettie, her timing was cruelly well-timed. I was about to put the brush in my mouth, and she struck! Despite it being the brush end than entered my nasal channel, it was so fierce that it brought blood. However, it could have been worse, and I soon dried it up. A bit sore now, though, Hehehe!

I started updating yesterday’s blog, and Carer Richard arrived. The poor lad didn’t look too good; he was obviously weary, worn out, tired at the end of his shift. I brought him around a smidgeon with some nattering and a laugh or two, as much as was possible. I think his blood count was low. He said on leaving, he’s going to take his own medicines and get his head down as soon as he gets home. He still had a chinwag, though; I appreciated that from the man. Bade him good luck and health as he left, taking the taste bags with him for me to the chute.

I then spent hours trying to get the Card Reader to work to get the photos on the computer. I was at the limit of my patience and know-how of what else I could try… and wallah! The card suddenly returned to working mode? Although there have been odd, weird times when it tells me the reader is not recognised. So frustrating, I lost hours on the day messing about, turning everything off and back on, the card in and out of the slot… swearing, and at one point, I almost cried!

Eventually, I got the blog finished and posted it off to WordPress. Thank heavens for that!

Time for a mug of Glengettie!

I took these photographs of the view from the kitchenette window. The first one to the left (South), the second down almost straight ahead (East), finally one to the right (North)

I pressed on with starting this blog going. It was concentrating mind…

My sociable, kind, understanding, compassionate, snotty-nosed neighbour above started his clunking, banging noises with some venom. I think he’s realised he was not so bad yesterday and is making up for it?

I stopped to make a brew of Glengettie, wrapping the tea bag up and placing it in the small waste bag; this is what I saw (on the right here). My initial reaction was… Argh! Another Boll Weevil! Oh dearie me! Out came the sprays, and the kitchen got a good covering in all corners and every hidey-hole or corner that I could get at!

I got what I thought was the offending animal out of the bag – but I could not see if it was a weevil or something else, thanks to Cataracts Kathleen, Glaucoma Gladys and Saccades Sandra.

Well, well, well! Another cock-up made yesterday, discovered! Tsk! I looked at the watch, then the clock. A difference in time showing? I’d forgotten to put the clock forwards with all the others, but a true Masterstroke-Whoopsiedangleplop with the new square, easier-to-see wristwatch! I’d put that backwards instead of forwards!!! Humph! It took me a while to work out what time it was now! So, I now have no idea when I got up this morning.

The sky turned into a bright blue; I’m glad I caught it with the Canon cause minutes later, it had turned back into a bright pale blue shade. It turned out to be a decent effort, I thought for once.

I took a photograph of the Chestnut Way end car park. It appears that the Red Van Man has not used his vehicle since yesterday. Hope he’s not poorly. Time to get some fodder organised.

The evening carer arrived and soon had the medicationalisationing sorted out. Took the waste bag with her to the chute for me on her way out.

I took an easy option tonight. Cooked some mushrooms with balsamic vinegar, squid sauce and chillies powder. (Not as ad as it sounds as it turned out, Hehe!) I sliced some lovely yellow tomatoes and forced myself to cut up some of the sickeningly bitter, foul-tasting Moroccan red tomatoes. Added the last of the ‘Batter bits’, a small apple and a banana. A Lemon and Lime M&S yoghourt that needed a mortgage to buy. And tucked into the feast… Oh, and of course, with the two hot dogs with BBQ sauce added. Flavour rating 7.2/10.

I went to Washed the pots, then me, Putting the trousers back on afterwards by mistake for the jammie bottoms! Tsk! Then settled to watch my favourite TV show, ‘Heartbeat’.

I couldn’t enjoy the programme properly, cause Colin Cramps visited my left hand and fingers. Never known him to be so painful and persistent!

Unbelievably, Colin Cramps stopped tormenting me the very moment that the end credits rolled for ‘Heartbeat’. Ah, well!

I rose for a wee-wee, and boy, had I taken some over the day! On the bright side, Little Inchies lesion was not bleeding. Check the taps (faucets) and electrics, and I got down in the £300, second-hand, decrepit, Haemorrhoid Harold-testing, sleep deterring, nauseatingly beige-coloured, not-working recliner.

The Thought-Storms kicked off straight away. They dragged things from over sixty-plus years ago; my errors, bad choices, failures… on and on, they kept coming! Some I had actually forgotten about altogether… they had to be mused over. I’ve no idea why; it only made me more depressed.

Out of desperation for sleep and to escape the storming, I turned the TV back on. Which worked… but at the same time, Colin Cramps attacked again in the same hand!

I think it was gone midnight again before I managed to nod off. Well, that’s not exactly right. I realised I’d not taken the Hemp capsule again! I nodded off many times, but only for a minute, then I’d shoot awake again.

At least the Thought Storms had given up on me, only to be replaced with Self-Hating-Harvey. I suppose that Dementia Doreen is at the route of things…

Inchcock Today: Diary with Odes

/ Inchie / 8 Comments

I’d like to start with my family, friends and flatmates here at Woodthorpe Court, in Sherwood, Nottingham

Roger Rabbit, waving to Lisa & Bill ♥

Their Mother & Father are my cyber-buddies, HRH Lisa, Billum and Alan, of Fort Thomas in the US of A. Lovely Gift; A smashing clan who sent them to me out of the blue, and I have a natter with them every morning! I made a family portrait this morning…

Inchcock Today

Whoops I woke up with a whopping great jump and jerk. It was of such magnitude it moved my body mass a few inches towards the edge of the second-hand, £300, c1968, overwhelmingly-sickeningly beige coloured, tatty, uncomfortable, wobbly-recliner. A few more inches would have had me on the carpet, cursing and nursing Harold’s Haemorrhoids! Hehehe!

Of course, that was the end of any sleeping, so I lay a few seconds to work out what day and time it was and any actions or activities required… But here was the watch? No longer on my wrist?

I soon found out what I’d done with it – fourteen hours later, I found it on the floor, behind the £300, second-hand bought, c1968, nauseously beige-coloured, not-working, rusty, rickety, difficile, crumb-covered tatty recliner.

During the ablutionalisationing, I realised I had not got my watch on. “Ah, well,” I thought, “It’ll be on the ottoman!” Finished off and made a brew of Glengettie. But…

Refilling the kettle, Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley kicked off. Talk about bad timing! Harrumph! The water went all over the previously washed and dried cutlery and crockery, down the front cabinet of the sink and down my trousers, socks and slippers, and onto the kitchen floor…

It took me ages to get it sorted and dressed again. I seem to be doing this a lot more often lately. Dementia Doreen? SSS? Peripheral Pete? Cataract Kathleen? Haha! Who knows which will get the blame.

Made a fresh mug of tea and got on the computer, rather pleased to be making an early start on the blog. Ha!

I had to do other jobs and kept nipping back to see if Liberty-Global, the company with a Revenue of: 12.98 billion USD (2021), who bought out Virgin Media Internet, are even worse than the scumball BT internet was… Not that Herr Fries is bothered. Don’t I pick them!

Did the health checks, and the internet was back on. But to for long, ten minutes maybe…

Pee’d off with this already! The Iceland delivery arrived. They had substitutes plain sausages again for the unavailable microwave ones! That’s the fourth time this year, I’ve sent them back each time, but they keep subbing them.

The strawberries and tomatoes were from Morocco. The strawberries had some slime on a few, which I threw away. The mini-cherry tomatoes were substituted for vine ones and tested for taste… Bloody Hell! I’ve tasted a tomato so foul and bitter in my life! Eurgh! They hadn’t any brown cobs in stock either! All in all, a bad do! I put the crap away.

Tried the computer again. It had come back on at last. For around a half-hour, then…

Well, obviously not that much… Git!

My morning Carer called and sorted me out. It was her first call. She came in without ringing the door chime and gave me a nervous tick! Even if she shouts out when she walks in, I can’t hear her with my hearing. Still, I wasn’t using the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket) when she came in. Hehehe!

Aha! The internet came back on… Thank you, Mr Fries. Got the post finished and sent off. Facebooking, and it happened again:

Liberty-Global has disassociated itself with Virgin Media; they do not mention that they own and fail to run it, hoping that Richard Branson will get the blame, I think?

One more effort once it came back on. Most anger-making and revenge prompting! But this time, I had to close everything down and off and reboot the box and computer.

I’ll have to give up on this; Liberty-Global Virgin Media Internet has gone off again! My language is crude at the moment. I am willing and wishing that Fries drops dead immediately. It won’t matter to me cause he can’t run the service anyway. He’s a number-cruncher, accountant, actuary, bean-counter, bookkeeper, calculator, con-man. His use of smoke and mirrors, off-shore account movements etc., are his strengths. A wanker of a banker! Indeed, he has no people-care or customer sensitivity.

I’ve lost all my heart in blogging now. I’ll get something to eat, give up until morning, and then try again to use LIBERTY-GLOBAL Virgin Media Internet. But I’m not confident… well, I am in a way – I feel sure that Fries will let things get worse… there’ll be a financial fiddle of some sort involved in the situation, I’m sure. But he is obviously trying to destroy a company, his company, that paid around $2.4 billion to buy out… why? Back-handers? Mafia? Money Shuffling & Juggling? Banking fiddle? You scratch mine – I’ll scratch yours?

Bribery and manipulation? Or just money-making savviness via greedy, devious, underhand means? Just a thought! Why is he shoving all the much-travelled money of Liberty-Global into telecom and internet companies the world over? When he obviously is incapable of providing a reliable service? A money-predatory and manipulative Con-Man supreme!

Today’s end car park inspection photograph.

Carer Valerie arrived. Just after I’d realised that I had no hot water from the taps (faucets). She was kind enough to find and write ht telephone number of the Nottingham City Homes Repairs in large letters so I could read it. I was a little nervous to ring yet if I had made a cock-up leaving a tap running or something. (The hot water was back on in the morning, Phew!) Off went Valerie taking the bags o the waste for me on her way. Thank you!

Herbert was giving it some hammer tonight; I wonder what he’s making this time. I found a picture that I’d taken last week, possibly from Thursday when I visited the foot lady at the hair salon appointment farce.

Washed and changed into the night attire, and I made up a bottle of spring water and lime juice. I did a couple for Carer Richard, who may come on Monday, and stored them in the fridge, so they will be nice and cold for him.

Hot much of a sunset again tonight, but still beautiful to me, even with the muted hue and colours.

I used the Canon camera. As for some reason, the Fuji developed a thick white line down the centre of the screen, and I could not remove it? Turned it off and then back on, but no luck; still there?

As I got down on the recliner to watch some TV, I took this snap of my legs. Not a pretty sight!

The fattiness in both legs was returning, or it might be water-retention, but I think not. I wish I knew why I felt that, but I cannot remember why now, Tsk! (Sunday morning)

Cartilage Cathy on the right and Arthur Itis on the left knee, can you see? The veins are shallower tonight, and the hairs have suddenly turned grey? The funny side of this shot was the feet not showing. Hahaha!

An Ode to an ‘Orrible Day

My signing with Virgin Media was happenstantial,
The computer… to be precise, Liberty-Global,
Ran by Mike Fries, money-mad and ignoble!
Who bought out Virgin Media, most controversial,
Liberty-Global is crap; blame is cunningly deflectable…
They keep shtum about owning Virgin Media – detestable!
So Richard Branson gets the blame, a sort of Guilt-Burial!
My hatred for Mike Fries is substantial…
Well, his hatred of customers is evidential…
His lousy internet seems to him inconsequential,
He still gets paid a fortune, and management are reverential?
The sickening signs of fiddling figures are torrential!
Although my evidence is only circumstantial…
And comes from a customer who is uninfluential,
Liberty-Global’s ever failing service makes me demential!

Morning all!

Inchcock Today: Belated Photographicalisations – Diary

/ Inchie / 29 Comments

Belated Photographicalisations INCHCOCKs DIARY

I’m afraid with the mess I made of the files when trying to master the card-reader problem, and then the CorelDraw graphics disaster… that’s a mild word for it! It was no less than a miracle how I managed to get the photos uploaded. Then the reader kept conking out midway through – and the unloaded SD pictures had to be searched for again… Then the card-reader conked out again all together! It’s taken me a lifetime to get them sorted… well, there are more unsorted now! Glagnangles!

Well, he’s been tap-tapping and knocking to keep me company once again, on and off all day! But he can’t help being well-off and all the management loving him so. In fact, as ignorant, unneighbourly, superior-natured, snotty, unresponsive, unfriendly, standoffish, snot-bags go, he’s one of the bestest.

I did have the pleasure of Carer Cheeky Charley calling this morning. So good to have a little natter and laugh. Her having to leave put me back in the dumps, but thankful for her cheeriness! ♥

I’ve not much idea which of the two days I’d no working SD reader photos were taken, but I’ve hazarded my best guess. Tried to get them in the order they were taken… I hope. Here we go…

A morning shot here, Mayhaps Wednesday. (Or, Thursday, or else Friday?) Or not. Got the splinter out! I seem to recollect my knocking over the towel holder and breaking it when I took this shot.

I took the Boot’s BP sphygmomanometerisationing, in the kitchenette, near the microwave machine. Why? Tsk! I haven’t got the foggiest; I can’t even remember taking it.

Still, the 149 Sys reading came out okayish. DIA 70, Pulse at 91. The body temperature was not such a good result, though! Even lower this time, the minimum being 35°c, it was a little low at 33.7°c.

I’m assuming the picture of the Dettol disinfectant would have had something to do with Little Inchies Fungal Lesion bleeding and my need to wash the trews using it?

Aha! I can remember taking this one! I used Carer Richard’s so kindly donated camera. The batteries ran out, but I had some in stock and changed them, got a decent shot? Something bugs me that I may have already put this on a blog? Ah, Thursday this one, when I got the Ocado order delivered, by a helpful bloke who took the bags through to the kitchen, bless his cotton socks. Some great nosh arrived! Marmite cobs, fresh pod peas, potato cheese and leek pies. (Had an Accifauxpa with them, I’ll try to remember to tell you of the farce later). 

A tasty treat of the day, Polish sourdough bread, cheese twists, as well. Oh, and the best cakes I’ve ever had in my life, and I’m gerrin’ on a bit now yer know, Hehehe! Four cream and strawberry jam tartlets… Eat them all? Me? Ahem! Erm… Yes! Got some strawberries as well; going out for treats, they will be. Got the stuff stored away.

I opened a Chukka cheese, leek and onion pie… no, that’s not right, erm… I was close. It was a potato, cheese and leek pie, and as I was putting it back in the fridge having removed the cardboard… Ailment number eight; Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley, ensured that I dropped the pie on the floor. Swiftly followed up by Peripheral Neuropathy Pete giving me one of his rare, but troubling, drop-something and flail-about, involuntary right-leg Neuropathic Schuhplattler Dances  (As cyber-mate Tim, in New Mexico has Christened them, Hahaha  To round off the farce, I trod on the Chukka pie!

Hence, I had to clean and mop the kitchenette floor yet again. For the third time this week. Each time it was caused primarily by one or more of the ailments. With all the things going wrong lately, I surprised myself with how I got on with the job; I even found myself singing out loud?

Erm,  Thurs… no, Fridays Health Checks  I think  Either one, the SYS and DIA were back up high again; However, the Pulse was down a bit. You can’t win ’em all.

Whoops The body temperature was about the same, too low  I’d try the in-the-ear one, but I can’t work out how to get the actual temperature up on display. Fair enough, there are buttons on it to confuse me… Haha!

I think I’ve made a cock-up on this one; I can’t remember eating this at all. So, possibly, Dementia Doreen is having fun with me, or I saved an old photo, not a new one… that is, of course, unless the computer card reader ate the new one?

Ah, this was Thursdays anyway, I reckon, Cause there is sourdough bread in the picture. See that, I worked that out despite Dementia Doreen. Har-har  Yes, I had two Heinz veggie burgers  Texan style. They were delicious  Yellow tomatoes, podded peas and BBQ sauce on the burger sandwiches.

Then… I demolished all four of Marks & Spencer cream and strawberry jam tarts!! Next time, I’ll be hard pushed not to order any more from Ocado – they were out of this world!

Fridays morning  It took me hours to get the blog done with the graphic of Lisa and Bill in their laboratory.

Getting photos onto the system was still a no-no, no-go!

Oh, bloody woe is me! That damned Shuddering Shoulder Shirley is having a ball with me this week. Her timing is just immaculate. I was just stirring the freshly made mug of Glengettie when she gave just one almighty jerk that resulted in tea and broken pottery on the kitchen floor once more that needed to be cleared, cleaned and mopped again!

I can’t take much hassle  Hehehe. There was no singing to myself this time around!

I decided to make a can of ready-made chilli, a hot one it says on the label. Do a few chips in the oven and dunk the Sourdough bread. I wonder if I can get the photograph of the meal onto the computer. What are the odds, Humph!

Saturday morning: Well, Gotten Himmel  The SD card worked first time this morning. This has not been the case for over fifteen days!

The can of strong Chilli-con-carne and garden peas was slowly warmed through. Then I added some grated leeks and some more red beans, Liquid smoke, then the BBQ sauce, all the time stirring it, on a low light, turning up the heat for the last few minutes. The BBQ chips done in the oven were added when I served it up. Some Polish sourdough bread and a Lemon & Lime yoghourt pot rounded off the meal.

Hehe! Delicious! Flavour rating 8.8/10… nothing like being precise.

The evening carer arrived when I was eating it; she was a front door non-chime ringer – didn’t half make me jump when she got in the room  (Haha!)

Sleep was resistant tonight. I tried putting on the TV, but even that didn’t help me nod off. Then the dreaded Thought-Storms arrived… and stayed toying in my brain for hours on end!

I did manage to nod off eventually and stayed that way for four hours, before the traditional springing awake with a jump… needing a wee-wee  So, up I got.

Ode To These Two Days


Whoopsiedangleplops, Accifauxpas & affrays!
Bleeding, fears, worries, errors, mistakes always!
Thought Storms, more so than for days…
The mind was unable to sort out or appraise…

The odd bit of good fortune… that did amaze…
Dropsies, I could have had the kitchen ablaze,
Memory blanks, medications and delays…
Forgetting what I’m typing; off the thought strays!

Started recalling the past, all my yesterdays,
Leaving my emotions depressed, in a haze!
But, at least no walking into doorways!
Mind you, on a superb tasting meal, I did graze!

Morning all!

Inchcock Today: Belated Photos, Comments quips and an Ode or two

/ Inchie / 16 Comments

Goodeth Morningski!

A nosh from earlier in’t week…

Odd sunsetting photographs.

Van Parking Expert!

White Van man’s excellent Parking!
Within the white lines marking!
No exit-ingress blocking!
No chance of any grid-locking,
Straight as a die, amazing…!
Very RVM (red-van-man) irking!

Blood pressure reading was more controlled,
Sys 150, Dia 71… But the pulse at 90, high-fold?
I’ll check on the web… NHS say 90 is Gold!
So today, BP returns deserve to be extolled!

The body temperature was not so good…
34.4°c, not as high as it should…
Little Inchies fungal-lesion is losing blood!
But things may get better; yes, they should…
But of that, there’s little likelihood!

Blood-Taking Dressing Removed

I thought the drops of blood on the cotton wool had created a humorous face pattern. I took this snap of it. Hehehe! There is rarely any bleeding after the magnificent, caring Nurse Hristina comes to do the blood-taking job, bless her. 💖

This is something that I look forward to!

I’m Beginning to Master the Whistling Kettle!

This morning, I even heard it!

I’ve located the inside of the fill-level marking…
Changing to reading glasses first…
If I use a torch, so I can see the etching…
So underfill it, so I can quench my thirst,
Then it gets louder… the whistling!
Trapping the finger closing the lid is worst!

Tuesday Evenings Meal

.

A treat of healthy foods tickled many a tastebud!
Fishcakes and cheesy potato cakes went down a treat!
Smoked haddock in some, cheese too, t’was alreet!
Mushy pea topping in the cakes…
Fishless fish-sticks to complete…
But I didn’t have a pud!
The meal I ate and felt replete!

Changing the bag in the kitchen bin,
Gawd strewth… what was I seeing?
Argh! An Evil Ironclad boll weevil biting beetle?
Have they returned again – bringing their teeth so evil?

I went into a Sherlockian mode, sort of preautopsy…
I got the beast out of the bin, then had a wee-wee…
So glad it was all black, due to my achromatopsy,
It was a biting boll weevil – Whoopsiedangleplopski
Seeing just the one, enough to bring on catalepsy!
A good search around, I could see no more – Whoopee!

Evening Sunset Today

The sky went from grey to this colour within a couple of minutes.

But stayed that hue for only ten minutes?

Finally, a further tribute…

Puckin Chairing a Meeting

This photo really scares me! They’re his advisors too!

Inchcock: Diary-Belated Photographicalisations 1.2⅑th

/ Inchie / 8 Comments

Belated Photographicalisations
Hope I’ve not put them on before…Tsk!

Yesterdays Nosh: Highlights of the meal? Every single chip! But many of the peas gave me the slip… Onto me, the chair and the floor, they lost their grip! The cheap beef? Smelt to me, of catnip?

Sunset Photo: Did the ablutions and adorned fresh night attire – I don’t think my choice of jammy bottoms helped me relax or drop off… hence it was a few hours before I could get off into the land of nod, with the help of the TV adverts!

Sunday 20th March 2022

The Nottingham Lads Diary – with Odeing

After about two hours of bliss with Sweet Morpheus, I shot awake, needing a wee-wee…

Haha! I had to get over the shock of seeing the jammie-bottoms and state of the ankle and feet first. I rose cautiously but with haste as the bladder was being tested somewhat. As I grabbed Metal Mickey and made for the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket), how much easier the feet felt after yesterday’s farcical visit to the foot lady. I soon realised that I had not taken last night’s Hemp capsule; that’s probably why I sprang awake so early… Just guessing, mind! So, I took one and went to the kitchen to make a brew of Glengettie to get me going.

Decided to Christen the new Hob kettle delivered yesterday. Well, the instructions were printed so tiny! Me struggling with the eyes, Saccades Sandra, Glaucoma Glenda and Cataracts Kathleen, reading them was a no-no! But hey, how hard can it be to muck-up using a kettle?

Well, dead easy for me, as it happened! The kettle looked alright; until it came to take its lid off! Bruised my fingers and banged my knuckles on the handle when the cover eventually gave way… Cleaned the inside and outside. Finding a maximum level of fill mark limit. This on the left is the kettle filled up to the maximum line.

Two mugs of water! Harrumph!

Carer Sobia (I think) arrived to sort me out. She spent a few moments letting me natter. ♥

Pressed on updating yesterday’s blog and got it finished, posted it off. Went on the WordPress Reader section. Replied to some comments from Tim and Bill. Then had a look at the state of the flat.

It was not a pretty sight!

I pondered on getting some cleaning done… Then, I considered some more but realised that I had to get Josies’ Sunday lunch done again. I say again, because yesterday, Saturday, I thought it was Sunday, which is today. And made her one yesterday – What a pillock! You see?

Off to the kitchenette, made up the chillies beans, chestnuts, tomatoes and four kinds of beans (already soaked from yesterday, but not put in the pan), ingredients and seasonings, kept checking things and back on the computer.

Oh, the kettle... I can’t hear the whistle when it goes off. Which was a little annoying. Not much!

Hahaha!

First, try to do the blood pressure; it was apparent that I’d either died or may have made an Accifauxpas?

The second attempt was a successful effort – albeit a rather higher than recent Blood Pressure reading. The pulse rate was within the given limits… I think?

Cor, blimey, luv-a-duck! Talk about a low body temperature! Summat is wrong here… surely?

Nipped to check on Josie’s meal cooking and put some treats on the tray, ready to be delivered to her door in a while when the chilli is all done and dusted. I’ve tried a little extra black bean sauce in it this time.

– Little Inchies fungal lesion has burst again. What a bloody mess! PP’s, lounge pants, the bottom of the shirt and the legs all needed sorting out, and in a hurry too, or Josies’ nosh might spoil! On with the cleaning up, I’ll leave the medicating until after I’ve sorted the Sunday lunch out… I’m not looking forward to that! Fed-Up? Me?

Pepped, presented and popped the tray of fodder to Josie’s flat. Back to my flat, and realised after perusing the TV schedule that three FA Cup (football-soccer) matches were shown almost after each other, and the third was Nottingham Forest – Liverpool… That was it! Everything else stopped, and I made a meal to eat while the first match was on. Down in front of the telly, and apart from wee-wee demands, I remained there for hours and hours…

I was not enthusiastic about this match, although I wanted Palace to win. Well before the half-time whistle, I fell asleep. I woke up right at the end of the game, seeing a pleasingish result. Made a brew, Porcelain Throned, and ready for the next match to miss…

I was hoping that Southampton might get a good result, them being the underdogs. Not that I say any more than the first half, then as the adverts came on, I nodded off… Ah, well! Glad I missed the thrashing in a way.

Damnations and Globberisations! The half-time nodding off came again! The first half was all Liverpool, as was to be expected, and they had most possession of the ball by a long way – Yet, I was proud of Nottingham Forest’s performance all the same, against a top division squad. They had beaten Arsenal and Leicester in earlier rounds, but Liverpool has always been a curse on Forest!

A genuine nice touch of compassion from Nottingham Forest, in leaving 97 seats empty, in the memory of fans who lost their lives in the Hillsborough disaster. RIP.

I fell asleep during the adverts on the telly again and woke up with Forest down a goal. Not that I really wanted to see the goal, but there was a repeat on another channel, and I watched that, which showed the goal. It also showed me how much better the reds were playing. No disgrace in losing like they did!

I was about to do my ablutions, and the door chime chimed its ♫ Oh, Susana ♫ tune. Had the Carer arrived early?

It was poor Josie. She had had an accident, she said… Bless her, she seemed genuinely upset. She’d dropped the small maroon Chilli-stew bowl and broke it. I put her mind at rest and made light of it, beaming my bestest smile at her, telling her not to fret… it can’t be helped. When it comes to dropping things, I take some beating, Hahaha!

The evening carer arrived minutes later. Her name was… erm…? Sophia? Who sorted me out with the medications. I decided to make a brew of Glengettie, and to my surprise, the sunset, which was previously dour and grey, had gone into a maroon-red mode. So, I took these snaps of it. Almost pastel colours tonight?

Got my head down and nodded off in no time; Grrreat!

I woke a few hours late in a semi-panic-mode. There was no option for me; I had to get up and have a Sherlock Holmesian investigation; I just knew something had been missed… I just knew I’d not done something or left summat on or off that should be the other… I was fully awake and as alert as I ever will be… fear of an unknown Accifauxpa or Whoopsiedangleplop were the driving force.

①: I started by checking the wet room’s taps, fearing finding a flood… Nope, all looks fine?

②: Then into the junk room to check if I’d left the iron on. Or the board up… Left the mini-vacuum on charge? Nope, all looks fine?

③: The danger Zone next, the kitchenette! Faucets both off. Nope, all looks fine?

④: The stove, had I left the new kettle on? Nope, all looks fine?

⑤: The microwave, Nope, all looks fine?

⑥:  The fridge door? Nope, all looks fine?

⑦: The windows secured? Nope, all looks fine?

⑧: Back into the recliner room-computer room. TV, the computer turned off? Cameras been left on charge? Nope, all looks fine?

⑨: Balcony doors? Telephone off the hook? Nope, all looks fine?

⑩: Still, the sense that something had not been done, or done that shouldn’t have been, lurked in my bonce? This was terribly mind-unsettling. I even went to look at the flat door… I don’t know why I did, but… Nope, all looks fine?

⑪: I checked all the lights and powerpoints. They all looked safe and were on or off as each needed to be.

This bugbear sentiment was joined by the ‘Thought Storms’ when I tried to get my head down again. Which naturally set off other worries, uncertainties and fears, ripping through the brain at such a rate it was impossible to concentrate on finding any solutions or ideas that may calm things down in the brain-cells…

This nagging, gnawing, pestering idea that something is wrong really got to me. Even when the Thought-Storms eventually ceased, I continued to think of what the

heck it could be – something I’d forgotten to do, most likely… Thanks, Dementia Doreen!

Ode To The Day

The day was miserable, and I felt bolshy…
No… a better word, is unappreciatory,
Cause things weren’t all Whoopsidangleploppery…
Niggles, failures, and wee-wees oversprayingily…
Unconfident, then again, I’m like this daily!

I was speaking to myself almost multilingually…
Nottinghamian, swearing; my thoughts subtextually,
Self-pity and hatred popping up continually…
Thought-Storms raging perpetually…
None of them being approvingly…
Every one of them, ruefully…

Thank You

Inchcock: Diary-Belated Photographicalisations 1.2

/ Inchie / 17 Comments

Including revelations from Inchcock’s past!

Oh, yes! and an Ode, too!

A mixed bag of Moon pictures from the kitchenette window.

I tried both cameras as well. Only the last one was any good. Hehehe! There were plenty of absolute failures taken, though.

Peripheral Neuropathy Pete struck at just the wrong time again! He’s clever at doing that, a cunning ailment indeed! Haha! I was just pouring the boiled water into the mug to make my Glengettie brew!

Memory Prompting old snap!

revelations

If I recall correctly (I sometimes do), this was taken in the back yard of Co-op Grocery store number 118. Arleston Drive, in Wollaton. I started there as Greengrocery Manager. During the happiest working days of my life! Boss, store Manager, Mr Morris. Got up to Assistant Manager of the store… and made a terrible choice, in accepting a job in Beeston, as the Greenfruit – Wet Fish shop manager. I often wondered over the years what would or could have happened career-wise if I’d stayed in Grocery as Mr Morris’ second man. Cause the Greater Nottingham Co-op got a new chairman, who unfortunately oversaw the retail foods departments. He closed the bakery, the cobblers (shoe repairers), and opened Superstores, the first being in Trowel, a couple of miles away from Lily Grove, where my shop was situated. Of course, they had lower prices, and my sales went down 33% the week the store opened! So… they closed it, along with many more small retail outlets.

The real sadness was that when I first saw him at the next shop, I was put in, another one due for closure, on Nuthall Road. I’d increased sales at that shop, mainly the wet fish sales, they were up 45%. But meeting him brought out the hatred for him in me. He was a smug know-all. I made it worse when he asked where I got catfish from. I picked up what he thought was catfish, told him I get it from Rossfish in the market – and told him, “It’s not catfish, it’s called Dogfish!” With all his conies and bum-lickers with him, this did not go down too well with his ego! Me laughing might have made things worse. After that, the hatred was mutual.

Until the new Superstore opened, a Bulwell Superstore, half a mile away! I was trying to sell cod fillets at 3/6d a pound, and the Superstore was retailing at 2/- lb! I was doomed!

He made my life a misery for years! When I moved to Tesco, I prayed he’d call in to laugh me off, but he didn’t. Probably just as well; it may have saved him from a few broken teeth and me from a prison sentence! Gawd, I was livid at the man!

But all came good years later, the Greater Nottingham Cooperative Society went bust! Hahahahahahahaha! The Co-operative Wholesale Society bought them out, and the first thing they did was close his miracle superstores! But I’d like to have seen him once more, just to laugh in his fat superior face! Still, that’s enough of that!

♫ Food, Glorious Food ♫

Just look at the healthy foodstuffs I had delivered! Bananas, Baked bean & cheese pasties, Cheese twists, fresh garden peas from Nicaragua. Potato and leek pie! Only one packet of smoked bacon this week. Apple pies instead of cream cakes? I did overdo the lemon & lime possets, I admit. Well, they were half-price!

Getting the fodder into the fridge, a minor calamity took place. As I took this photo above, the possets fell off the shelf, one hitting the corner of the drawer below and chipping some plastic off of it… I hastened to make sure that the other jars were safe from falling further…

I trod on the splinter of plastic! Well, the blood flowed! It messed my socks, feet, slippers and the freshly mopped floor. But did I swear and curse? Of course, I did!

I was in the middle of sorting things out. I’d done the floor, and I was in the wet room, tending to the feet and socks and a change of clothes. I thought I’d heard a bell or chime from somewhere? I limped naked into the front room and had missed a call on the mobile, so I rang the number back. The Hairdressers in Winwood Court also do chiropody, telling me my appointment to have the plates done; it was in 20 minutes!

I was a little flummoxed as I rushed to get the dressing done, got the trousers on, left the socks for Sarah to put on for me after doing my feet, checked things for safety, no taps running, owt on the stove etc. and fell chuffed as I left the flat, thinking I can just make it in time…

As I got to the lift, a chap from the other end smiled at me… and said, “You know you’ve got your pyjama bottoms on?” Der!!! I replied that I do now, thanks!

Scrambled back into the apartment, changed into the trousers, and legged it to the hair salon as fast as possible. I may have been a minute or two late. Judging by the glaring look that I got when I entered, possibly a little longer. Oh dearie me! But it got worse… I had the feet done, then slipped her a can of G&T in thanks, and started to wheel the walker trolley out of the door.

I again got the same threatening look as she said: “Are you going to pay then?” No trace of a smile involved! Oh, things are not going well; Dementia Doreen is having a ball with me!

I got back up to the flat and cautiously made a brew of Thompsons Punjana. I say cautiously, cause the kettle is kaputt, and I have to use a saucepan of water – high-risk that, if Peripheral Pete, Shaking Shaun, or Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley should kick-off!

I checked on the order for a kettle on Amazon. Says it is coming tomorrow… It says tomorrow, by 22:00hrs, the tracker says it has not even near to arrived for despatch yet? Hmm! I was hoping it would come sooner; I’m risking s good scalding using the saucepan.

Nosh: Bean and cheese pastie. Two cheese twirls, yellow tomatoes and tons of fresh garden peas. Haha! Flavour: 8.2/10.

Moon from a distance.

Ah, that’s better!

Another decent effort, I’ll try again… I did. I’m too ashamed to show three smudged shaky efforts and this one below…

When I got back and worked on the blog for a good while, I suddenly panicked that I may have left the tap running when I had to dash out to the foot-lady… I shot like lighting to check on the wet room… Well, that’s a lie, but I hobbled as hastily as I could. I am glad to report that I had not left the faucet running at all…

However… I still nearly fainted when I got in the wet room? I’d left the convertor heater on full blast! What a wally!

A sunset from which day, I’ve no idea. But it’s pretty?

If the SD card does not fall apart again and the card reader on the computer is behaving, I’ll have a look later to see if there are any more pictures on there I’ve not put on. Ah, got some!

Forgot about them, me? Yes!

Well pleased with these figures… again!

Body temperature up a bit; it reminds me of the quiz show on the telly years ago, the Golden Shot with Bob Monkhouse. Do you remember it? It was not a brilliant show, but it was so good when Mr Monkhouse compared it. Poor Charlie Williams, who took over when Bob left, was lost. He was a great comedian all the same.

Hello, I got one more sunset photo in tonight! Bootiful!

Ode To My Photographicalisationings

Why is the quality of my photos varying?
Well, there are several reasons, some being…
Firstly, there’s Shirley’s-Shoulder-Shuddering…
Dizzy Dennis is always ready and lurking…

Peripheral Neuropathy Pete… now theres’ a thing!
He can make me wobble, things go dropping…
My right leg Neuropathic Schuhplattler dancing!
Nasty, if I’m Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucketing!
Even taking a Weak-Unwilling-Negligible-Trickling,
Throughout the room, the wee-wee goes sprinkling!

Vascular Dementia Doreen, the one I’m fearing…
She gives my memory and brain a pommeling!
Reflux Roger, thankfully now rarely troubling…
Duodenal Donald can be bad, he’s not piffling!

Next, the latest big three ailments arriving…
Cataracts Kathleen, the most serious warning…
48 weeks to wait, before a consultants scheduling,
Right eye worse, with Saccades Sandra troubling…
Glaucoma Gladys, the eyesight is now failing…

The oldest ailments, that are still surviving?
Little Inchies Fungal Lesion, Phimosis, can he sting!
Mechanical Heart Valve, no need for alleviating…
Especially as it is thankfully working!

Another ailment that doesn’t affect picture taking…
The ear holes have long been handicapping…
Now, the ear wax in them is tightly congealing,
I can’t hear the telephone ringing,
Hear the radio or television playing…
Hardly hear the chap upstairs banging and knocking…
But of course, the last line is an advantage!

Try to make them Laugh Series

Inchcocks Local News Snippets – With Odes – Part 854⅐th

/ Inchie / 24 Comments

A surprising jump in numbers, innit?
If it keeps on rising, we could be in the shit!
I hope the old face-masks still fit…
I bet folks have lost their vaccination chit?
Again the NHS will reach its capacity limit!

Sorry, I’ve gone off subject cause I’m frit…
Putin’s taking our minds off of it?
Puckin’ Putin makes me want to vomit!
We can name-call, posture and discredit…
I fear it’s only Putin that will profit!

Could we not put these animals in the army again?
Sentence them, and send them to Ukraine?
Arm them with their own machetes and Dunblane?
Hopefully, there they will learn how to die immame!
Decency and empathy to them is impossible to train,
Violence, hatred, bullying… that’s their skills and game,
They deserve to be at the bottom of the food chain!

Why do violent attackers get freed so soon, just asking?
Considering the reoffending rate… it’s amazing?
If they are caught, sometimes culprits are escaping?
They laugh at the courts, a slapped wrist; Horrifying!

A 21-year-old accepted to become a student?
Do they not have some sort of appraisement,
Any checks to find mental dysfunctions impediments?
To protect real students from any imperilment?
The end of appeasement is needed, that’s evident!.

So much nasty violence now, I’m feeling so languescent,
At the shortages of any youths that are moral and decent!
Gangs, muggers, knives… are they scared or always temulent?
Or is it me who’s scared and judged things misdempt?.

Another woman and child basher, his name, Mark Place,
Looks like a natural bully, do you see his face?
I reckon he’ll get out and strike again, as always…
Domestic violence, I knew well in my younger days…
I suppose this is why this irks me more in some ways…
In clink, he can play pool for free on the green blaise…
If the cook serves him ketchup for mayonnaise,
He might try to strangle him, and put him in a daze?
Then his pathetic sentence, they’ll reappraise?.

♫A policeman’s lot is not a happy lot♫, they sangeth…
As more violent East European gangs approacheth…
The bobbies of today get little help from the judges…
Youths stealing cars, on drugs… it beginneth…
Lawlessness, can no one else seeth?
Bobbies being smashed in the teeth?
More and more roaming, violent gangs triumph!
Ten-year-old truants, on drugs and drinketh?
Murderers freed early, to kill again as they pleaseth?
Politicians lying, cheating as they requireth?
Teachers stabbed while trying to teacheth?
For the future of Britain… I do really feareth!

Desperate times for the countries diminishing law,
Parole boards are freeing killers to kill more!
We hear little nowadays from the House of Lords?
Cutting the cost of imprisoning, they applaud…
Well to save money… are they all blinkered?
Save victims! Send the violent away… with a chessboard!
A ludo game, and cut back on their food, you coward!
Luxuries, mobiles, cocaine they can get, but I can’t afford!
Can’t get to see my doctor, or mend my motherboard…
A convicted murderer can get both – and kill again afterwards!
Will we ever see proper justice? I’ll be beggared!

Andrious Sidlauskas: Lithuanian immigrant jailed.
Happening a lot innit?

Just thought I’d update you on how my luck is going…
Well, with excitement, I’m not exactly glowing…
3 houses to find… it must be easier going…
To find just one, than to miss them all as I keep doing…
I used to find this free game compelling,
Now, it’s just embarrassing! Hehehe!

.

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Inchcock: Thoughts on Imbecilities – In Odes

/ Inchie / 8 Comments

Thoughts on Imbecilities

Vascular Dementia Doreen and the Thought-Storming,
Memory-loss, mind blanks, can be mentally disturbing,
At times depressing, troubling, often gruelling…
Alto-Ego and Inchies brain, arguing, duelling…
Sometimes the mind needs a rest for refuelling,
Here are some of the traits revealed, comedic and appalling!

Arguing with Alto-Inchy…

Conflict often starts when in the wet room, ablutioning,
I’ve only one mirror; I use it for shaving in the morning…
Or with mind-blanks, sometimes, it will be in the evening,
I hate him; he’s superior, nasty and criticising!
This Alto Inchie… the other me… can be baffling…

Mayhaps I need a neurologist or Psychologist visiting?
I hear sounds from the past, traffic, songs, bugling…
Although usually, we are deep in mental brawling…
Me, the one who ends up depressed and caterwauling…
Yet occasionally, Alto-Ego, becomes less insulting?

I suppose I need some form of help, some counselling?
Yet I don’t believe anything can stop my mind from crumbling!
Physically Peripheral Neuropathy Pete can be disabling,
The Stroke ensured I shall forever be struggling…
The Cataracts, Glaucoma and ears are much more worrying…

Yet some days, incredibly, I seem to be coping?
I find that I am actually optimistic and hoping,
I can sort out bits of concern by disentangling…
The feeling guilty for my self-pity, by realising,
Others are worse off and alone too… Humbling!

Stop and Ponder…

The Thought storms may suddenly go into mothballing…
I stop in the front room – it needs cleaning and sorting…
The brain tells me I require mollycoddling…
My fears and depressions certainly need muzzling!
Priorities need arranging and some actioning!

But it’s not easy for me, detail classifying, pigeonholing,
Forgetting, misplacing, quarrelling amidst the schemozzling…
Fears, worries, flash into mind… like anchovies shoaling,
I feel my sanity at times is stumbling on its way to failing,
Do you think the NHS will do mind-surveilling?

Mentally Distorted

I see the view via photographing,
What do you see? Well, according to me…
Somewhere out there; Some folk will be contradicting,
Or a poor sod in the middle of a bankrupting…
A family, communally banqueting?
A Monopoly player cheating?
Someone undoubtedly shoplifting…
A lamb in a field might be bleating?
Or emergency workers, fire-fighting,
Drug gangs, selling, abusing…bloodletting?
A politician… bloviating!
A news reporter, reporting?
An illegal immigrant deporting?
A lucky sod having sex… luxuriating!
Someone up an alleyway, urinating?
First-time home-owners, decorating,
An old age pensioner… constipating!

A Dour Sunsetting

A hard-up family, regretting Brexiting?
A hustler, planning, hornswoggling!
A fiddling bank manager… calculating?
A mugged pensioner, capitulating…
A murderer being freed to kill again – Sickening!
A baby going through the pain of castrating?
A young couple learning about cavorting!
Another freed murderer, celebrating?
A Hari Krishna member chanting,
A water worker, chlorinating?
A Nottingham pick-pocket circulating,
A Politician: World war circumventing?
A pair of gents, cockfighting,
A Policeman, machete and gun confiscating?
Jews and Arabs coexisting?
Ah! Now I’m getting into the land of dreaming…

Bad Parking!

.The Red Van Man – lousy parking…
Parking properly, he’s not contemplating…
Maybe he has not got the ability?
If so, parking without conformity…
Blocking fire engines in an emergency?
He should get a cautioning?
Ah, now I’m remembering…
Private land! So no legal prosecuting…
I’m not surprised; at the laws failing…
They free murderers to do more killing!

Dangerous!

Look at these perfect results above, contrasting…
To yesterday, when the SYS was rising…

Oh, dearie me!

The temperature was ever more declining…
34.1°c, but I’m only witwantoning!

Angel Julia

.American Carer Julia, her kindness is unremitting,
She had another call to do, so not much nattering…
Whenever Julia calls, I find it thrilling…
When Julia leaves, it is somewhat saddening…
For she cheers me so, she’s pleasant, patient and Caring ♥

Lip Smackingly Good!

Do you like the look of the meal above, my dining?
No meat as such, but fish-sticks, without fish in?
The taste of them was breathtaking…
Not too sweet, oven chips, no frying…
And I’m not lying, the most satisfying…
Truly tasty, there’s no denying…
A treat to the taste buds… gobsmacking!
Harry Ramsdens Chip Shop style, well-worth trying!

I find things today are moral-contaminating,
Not that I’ve done much in the improving things contributing!
I’ve drifted along, weak-willed and no consolidating…
Done my bestest to be kind and temper-moderating…
Welcomed, greeted folks, by my bridge building…
Do no harm, I did to help for others, aid-orchestrating…

Now disabilities, old age, vascular dementia I’m getting…
I keep falling over, but not fainting,
Struggle with my ablutioning,
Tried not for others to be abnegating…
The eyes and ears problems get no alleviating,
Let alone actually obtain any treating!

I’m aware of Dementia Doreen; I need sanity-auditing,
My thoughts and intentions… are not completing…
Use of the brain is nowadays complicating,
My decisions, fears, desires are self-conflicting…
I do little to deserve any respect or congratulating,
The Thought-Storms are ever congregating…

The mind seems to be mentally contorting,
The physical side doesn’t stand reporting…
Even taking a wee-wee needs coercing!
From logicalness, I think I’m distancing…
Any paperwork is confusing and inconveniencing!

Memory, or lack of, mind blanks, have me cursing…
I need help, mayhaps a little nursing?…
No, perhaps some rejoicing, romancing?
I may get by with some reminiscing?
The brain has little left for downloading!

Inchcock’s Make ‘Em Laugh Series – In Odes

Inchcock Today: Ode to Sanity – Part11⅒th

/ Inchie / 3 Comments

ODE TO THE THOUGHT-STORMS
Inspired while Inchy was waiting for the action to start at his mornings’ Porcelain Throne visitation. It took a while!

The Thought-Storms on the Throne are getting nastier!
No respite, the evacuation stopped halfway, I got edgier…
The questions came at me; it couldn’t be crappier…
It’ll be a while before the pain stops, and I feel any happier!

Any logic in the Thoughts couldn’t have been scantier…
From the fear of loneliness, Putin, and questioning Santa!
Should I have a mug of tea or a can of Fanta?
The Thoughts mingled became silly and schleppier…

Hopes, then worries, self-pity, to pathetic fear!
Strangely, after so many years, I fancied a beer!
The brain was making me feel dizzy, oddly queer…
The nose began to run, and it got even leakier!

My confidence in coping died, I became even qualmier…
The Thought-Storm was driving me balmier…
I noticed that my stomach looked lardier…
And Little Inchies fungal lesion got itchier?

The Thought-Storms had me by the jugular…
I tried to fool them and acted jauntier…
Talking to myself, battling the brain,
I couldn’t move because of the evacuation pain!
The whole situation became worse again…
When Neuropathic Pete got me shaking, jitterier!

I knew that later on, things would calm down, likelier…
Suddenly the room felt cold, much parkier…
I even began to shake and shiver?
Gawd, things were getting nigglier!
I felt I was going even loonier!

The evacuation flowed again, which made me panickier,
Should I give a push, or leave it, which would be riskier?
Then the Thought Storms got even bolshier…
And the room felt like a fridge; it got so much chillier?
Was I still in the recliner dreaming? Or going crazier?

Then for once, I got luckier…
I stood up, feeling pluckier…
The evacuation ended alright,
As I pushed with all my might,
It had been a struggle and fight,
I’d won, no bleeding, I felt leerier…

For the Thought Storms stopped then…
As stubbed my toe on the tungsten…
I don’t usually appreciate the pain often…
But the Thought-Storms stopping was a gem!

Part of the Inchies True Make Them Laugh In Ode Series