Inchoative Inchies, dairy. Monday 28th December 2020.

♥ TFZeress Janet, visiting Nottingham, I’m keeping an eye on her! ♥


Monday 28th December 2020

Zulu: UMsombuluko 28th December 2020

Such fascinating memories! Ahem!

Head-down 21:30hrs. At 23:10hrs: I shot awake, and the brain soon joined me. Whatever the sudden expergefactor was for this, I do not know! But I did know I could not ignore that something had woken me, and I had to get up and have a look around for any signs of danger, calamity, or risk, that might be lurking. I needed a wee-wee anyway.

The freeing of the onerously large and flobby-stomached torso with the dangly legs from the recliner was achieved with relative ease, this morning. Once up onto my feet and doing the balance exercises, I knew care would be needed in my hobbling around in my search for the cause of me rude-awakening. The balance was all over the place, SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley), CC Cartilage Cathy and RAI’s (Rheumatoid Arthur Itis’s) knees were all in a cruel, foul mood with me. (Fair enough, yesterday they were all kind to me)

I made an inspection of sorts of the flat, room by room. The Hallway apart from being untidy had no indications of anything out of order.

Apart from being even more untidy and messier than Steptoe & Sons, the junk room bore no signs of wrongdoings.

The wet room, again untidy, but it looked okay safety-wise.

The kitchenette, the three rooms’ messiest, made me feel guilty, but no dangers were found.

Off back to the front room, to utilise the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee Bucket). I think it’s going to be another struggle-to-pee day. The flow was reluctant and needed internal encouragement, which was a risky thing to do; When I applied some power to push the fluid out, the rear-end department very nearly started to evacuate of its own accord! Crivvens, it was a close thing! No question about it, Trotsky Terence is going to be in charge of the evacuations this morning!

As I was getting the kettle on, (and this must have looked the most comical speed-hobble I’d ever done) the movement from the rear-end began to flow of its own accord on the limp to the wet room, I hit my shoulder on the door frame, knocked the clothes off of the coat hangers in the hall onto the floor, and stubbed the same toe as I did yesterday against the heater!

I distinctly recall thinking, ‘Well fancy that!’, as I scrambled onto the much-needed Porcelain Throne! Cough, cough!

The action began before the bum had hit the plastic lid! A mammoth, tremendously long torpedo made its way to freedom. But smoothly! No pain, but much bleeding from Harolds Haemorrhoids, I’m afraid.

Where all evacuated product came from, I’ve not the foggiest? Well, I know that. What I meant was, with me not eating a lot of fodder yesterday, how did such a massive quantity of waste come from. I think? A total victory for Trotsky Terence once again. All over fairly quickly, I began to clean things up, medicate the backside with Germoloid ointment, and wiped around to make sure that none of the sprinkling wee-wee that exited at the same time, had missed the bowl. Thinking all the time, about the mess I have to clean up in the hallway and kitchen yet! 

Washed, and cleared, cleaned-up the mess I’d made in the hallway and kitchen in my desperate dash to the throne. Got it done, eventually, and brooded over my bad luck, wondering if it will ever improve before the Grim Reaper arrives. Tsk! Did myself no good though, BPB Back-Pain-Brenda) is giving me some stick now, due to all the bending when clearing up. Humph!

Made a brew of 99 tea for a change, and noticed the two lights were showing again, in fact, they came on as first looked out of the window? An odd thing that, lights coming on at two in the morning? I took a couple of snaps of the view from the kitchen window.

The first one I used the Nightime Panorama, the second was done in Auto mode.

I later found this shot on the right. I think it was an involuntary one, Ahem!

The stomach was beginning to rumble and churn again, I didn’t think it would be long until the Throne was needed again. (Where’s it coming from?)

Then, I went into one of my brain-dead, lacking logicality, total loss of concentration, lost-the-plot-yet again, what-the hell-am-I doing, modes!

I knew what I was doing alright, and yet I didn’t think it was right for some reason. But on I plodded, started on doing the hand-washing and sorting the togs out.

All in a robotic fashion?.

I moved the zip-up jacket, hanging above the sink to drain on a coat-hangar, it was nearly dry enough to use now.

I hung that in the hallway over the clothes airer.

Then got the quilt from the recliner, and hand-washed it with great care and attention? Checking it closely for any loose bits of cloth or spots I’d missed in the washing process.

Even the fabric softener and disinfectant were used in rinsing, and I rinsed the thing several times before adding the liquids in one final rinse. I got that hung above the kitchen sink to drip dry.

Why had I done this? No idea, but I somehow knew it had to be done? I had a spell similar to this a few months ago. I mentioned it to the Falls-Team man if I remember correctly, it just made him laugh! The instant I’d got the quilt hung, a semi-normality returned, and much confusion with it! Why?

So, much later than ever before, I made another brew of Glengettie and started updating the Sunday blog. My doing the sudden handwashing kept coming into my mind to toy with. Why? The wee-wees kept interrupting my progress, and each one was just a tiny sprinkling. The damned ‘Hum’ was again so loud.

At long last, I got the blog finished. I got it posted off, along with the email link. Pinterested a few snaps. (Using the notes from the pad to update this, I came across F13, written clear enough for me be certain that is what I had scribbled – what the heck it means, I’ve not the least knowledge of?) Reading through the other writing on the pad, I realised I had not done the Health checks!

I got the ear drops done first. Another farce, I got more down the face than in the eye. Huh! I was beginning to think I was losing it today!

The flaming SYS was at 165, to high again. There will be no nurses calling to take my blood that I can talk to with the holidays. Shame!

The temperature was fine, though. Not all bad and bonkers then, Haha!

Back to the computing, and went on Facebooking. That took far less time than usual, folks will be busy with their families, sorting out and getting plans made for the New Year?

Aha, the second summoning to the Porcelain Throne arrived. There was nae bother this time. I got there in plenty of time, a repeat of the first visit, but less of it. Hehe!

The well-stubbed toe was not as bad; I thought it might be. The pale skin looked a bit blotchy, but that’s normal, I suppose. I think I should be more concerned about the brain, rather than body, after this morning’s mental farcicalities!

I made a start on this template for an hour or two, but the concentration was ailing. Then went to make another brew of Glengettie. The fog had come down now.

I took a few pictures.

After which, I had visits from Shaking Shaun, which did me no good, especially as Shaun stayed with me for over an hour! By the time he’d left, SSS had returned for another hour or so, donating a very stiff aching shoulder for me to put up with, making typing with any degree of accuracy a difficult job. I’m literally praying that the other ailments, like Nicolas and Anne Gyna, don’t kick-off. Now the mental and physical challenges were a hassling me. Argh!

I took a break from the concentration-demanding blogging, and I poddled to the kitchen to check on the thin quilt.

I moved the nearly dried quilt, over the server on wheels trolley, and moved it close to the storage heater, to let it get dried enough.

Then had a look into what I might have for the meal today. The tin of Krakus Lopatka (cooked pork shoulder), I’d bought in error, thinking it was pork knuckle attracted my attention. That, with some potatoes or chips, peas or beans sounded a good idea.

Then I spotted a can of sausage and bean stew, that appealed even more to me. Because I vaguely recall trying it before and enjoying it. Of course, relying on what I remember is not a guarantee of anything! But, I took the decision to try it today. I took a decision a few weeks ago, you know, oh, yes!

Of to the kitchen and got the can opened without any fuss A ring-pull!

Put it in the saucepan to find there is only one insipid looking sausage in it! The beans are tasty, though. It’s called a stew? So I got the oven on, to do some frozen pork sausages to add to the pan. Cunning eh?

The fog was still there outside. How I feel, and things are going today, there is probably more fog in my head than there is out there. Hogglebogwash!

The head was getting more confused now, so I gave up on the blogging and prepared the meal. I did some sausages in the oven, and added them to the saucepan, along with some Squid vinegar, and a tin of chilli beans. It came out alright, a Taste Rating of 7/10.

Sleep took a while, but it did arrive earlier than usual. Didn’t stay too long, but I had a  straight-through uninterrupted kip of 4-hours, which was welcome, and is about average for this last week.

Take care, folks.

Incised Inchies, Sunday 27th December 2020 diary

TFZer Nancy, it was a couple of years ago, mind.


Sunday 27th December 2020

Greek: Κυριακή 27 Δεκεμβρίου 2020

01:10hrs: I woke after a rather sad, just under three hours of sleep. Robotically, I climbed falteringly out of the egregious, £300, second-hand, c1968, unsteady, not-working, incommodious, oh, so sickenly beige-coloured, haemorrhoid-testing recliner, and caught my balance easily enough. No calls for a wee-wee!

I turned the computer on. Argh! The greatly dreaded, much-feared, trying, and gut-wrenching ‘Blue Screen’ came up mid-way through its loading!

The heart sank, instant depression dawned, my shoulders sagged, and it seemed as if life had stopped for me! A blackness, blankness and confidence-destroying mood ensued!

As it restarted. It seemed to take a long time, during which I waited patiently… no, that a lie! – I panicked, fretted and prayed for a successful outcome!

‘Phew!’ It started up okay then! I gingerly opened up the Firefox internet, then the CorelDraw, and things seemed to be working in a normal fashion. I cheered up exponentially but did not go into any Smug-Mode, not until I was sure things would work right again. Boy, was I relieved and glad!

Within a few seconds of my renewed faith being restored, the summoning to the Porcelain Throne arrived, somewhat urgently. Off to the wet room I trotted, well, limped.

This Throne session had to be the easiest of the year! (I’ll stop taking the Docusate, now!) I was almost in complete control of the movement (First time in many a month, that!) Minimal pain! No Bleeding! Most satisfying!

However, this for the first time in ages, an easy victory for Trotsky Terence over Constipation Konrad, was the messiest evacuation in months as well! I may even have to order some more toilet rolls if this carries on. Hehe!

I then had to tend to the Health Checks because I’d forgot to do them earlier. Sad, innit? But I digressed from the plan yet again, deciding it was time for the first Glengettie cuppa of the day to be made and drank. While the kettle was boiling, I noticed the lights that I thought were car headlights again, across in Sherwood. This time two hours earlier than usual?

I got the Nokia camera to take a photo, but the rain was pelting down, and the wind was blowing. So I opened the unwanted unliked, light and view-blocking kitchen window, and tried to take a snap from within, of the lights. Aha! I’d made yet another mess of my photographicalisationing! Although there is an artistic aspect to the resulting picture, it was not planned, obviously.

I read the paragraph above later while editing, and realised I got something else wrong too. I’d written Nokia, in error for Nikon camera, yet again! Grobleknackerbangles!

Got the tea brewed, and back to the Health Checks. The Boot’s Boot’s made in China Sphygmomanometer readings were a lot betterer, with the SYS down from 178 to 154. Nice that!

The Chinese made Harpin Xian Di contactless thermometer, was in the green again, showing a temperature of 36.7°c.

I concentrated on getting the updating of the Saturday post completed. During this session, the wee-wees kicked in, and I think had to have about four of them over the next two hours. Mmm!

I got the finished blog sent off to WordPress. Replied to some emails, and made another brew of tea, Thompsons Punjana this time. (Two more wee-wees?)

The car lights were there still, although I do not think they are vehicle lights now. And tried to retake a decent photograph. This one came out much better than the first effort. Then I took an unzoomed shot in Nightime panorama mode. I’d hoped the clouds I could just make-out in the sky would be captured, but no!

Then I went on the Facebooking updating. Next, onto the WordPress Reader. (Three wee-wees) Started this blog off, and stayed with it for a good while. Sadly, mostly due to the never-ending error-correcting that was needed. Not blaming any ailments. They were kind to me, just a lack of concentration, and lousy-memory for facts, the wanted word and details.

The wee-wees were lessening a lot for some reason, in all the hours of doing the above, I only needed two of them. Then I realised I’d not taken the morning tablets yet – So I did. Hello, the rain has stopped falling!

Another mug of tea was fancied, so I went and made a cup of Glengettie. On the way back to the computer, Argh! I stubbed a toe! A pretty good effort it was, on the wheel of the swivel chair.

Of course, it didn’t bother a bold, brave, heroic person like me at all. Ahem!

I got a brekkers of sorts made up. It was supposed to be a little snack, just a Cornish pastie, peas and what was planned to be a tiny portion of cheesy potatoes, which I got carried away making and went overboard with the amount I made. I think doing Josies CP’s later was on my mind, and I did enough for both of us, Hehe!) So, this ended up as breakfast and main meal for the day for me. I ate it while watching a YouTube video about the serial killer and cannibal Jeffrey Dahmer. I ate all of the breakfast, and I even nibbled some nuts afterwards.

Did some blog updating on this post, made a brew.

Then it was time to get the ablutions sorted out. Which, I did! A stand-up job, which took longer than expected, not that it mattered much. The shaving produced a few nicks here and there. One on the earhole, the chin and the lip. I had a tender spot in a delicate area that I assumed was another furuncle coming. I manipulated the Nikon camera, with dexterity, or just good luck. I managed to get a shot of the offending pain giving whatever it was. Anybodies guess, but I’ll stick with it being a … well, it looks like a boil or furuncle. The discharge from it overnight had been captured in the PPs, so no bother there.

I did a lot of blogging, email reading and sorting, got rid of some unwanted photos from the SD cards, and potatoes. The wee-wees were going on strike. And I took this photo after the rain had stopped altogether.

Time to get Josie’s nosh prepared, and what a performance that was!

  From the preparation to plating, took only about an hour. But the mess made was astronomical! The dropsies, too many to count included; the mixing bowl, cutlery, saucepan (luckily empty at the time), the mixer tool and the oven tray (luckily, also empty at the time).

Burnt my finger on the oven rack, I knocked the little black clock off of the window ledge (Not working now! I’ll investigate it later), cut my little-finger slicing the tomatoes, Clouted my head getting back up from retrieving the wooden spoon, and hit it again on the cupboard door! (Spacial awareness on the right side). All-in-all, a Nightmare Kitchen purgatory scenario, that Gordon Ramsay would not have been able to help with. Hahaha!

However, with my confidence aflame, I pushed my muscular firm youthful body onwards, ignored the blood, aches and bruises, and got the meal finished and plated! And delivered it to Josie’s door at the regular time of 12:00hrs.

As normal, she was on the phone to her sister again. Every week, it takes the edge off, making all that effort, not knowing if the gal will carry on with her call or get the meal while it’s still warm. Still; ‘Nemo Mortalium Omnibus Horis Sapit!‘ I hope that she does get it eaten and enjoyed. Then I’ll be happy, too!

By the time I’d got back and cleaned up… well, pretended to sort out the mess in the kitchen, I was drained again, even earlier than usual. All-in, mentally.

Dizzy Dennis joined in with the Thought Storms, as I settled into the £300, second-hand, c1968, cringingly-beige-coloured, not-working, rickety, incommodious, grotty recliner.

The brain required respite from the annoying Thought Storming, but it didn’t get any.

Ignotism Expert Inchcocks Diary – Friday 18th December 2020:

——————————————————————

Friday 18th December 2020

Maori: Paraire 18 o Tihema 2020

01:25hrs: I stirred into an ersatz form of semi-life, my not wanting to, with great reluctance… for not only did I need the Porcelain Throne, but I realised I’d only I been in the land of nod for about two hours!

How can I best describe my mood? Grumpy, irritable, disgruntled and somewhat discomposed!

As I untangled my still-tired, rather-prominent, gigantic, wobbly-bellied body from the chair, and rose up onto my poor uncut-toenailed and ulcered feet, to catch my balance; the need for the Throne, encouraged me to cut short the exercises. Hobbling to the wet room, I remembered I have the Iceland delivery coming, and the appointment with the Chiropodist today at 13:30hrs. (Which proved that the brain had kicked into gear earlier than it usually does, Hehe!)

I had livened up a smidge by the time I’d got settled on the Porcelain Throne. Just in time to be fully aware that the evacuation was going to be a struggle! Nothing was going to move of its own accord, as things usually do for me. After, and I’m not joking, about ten-minutes of crosswording, I decided I had no alternative, but to force things along…

From the first agony-ridden inner-push, it must have taken another ten-minutes before anything moved, well there was an initial movement of a very short few seconds duration. It was a matter of giving it some hammer, stopping to recover from the pain and effort, and repeating the process! When things finally restarted, I thought I might split myself in two, crikey was it giving me some stick, in slow motion!

Eventually, a thud and the pressure eased. Oh boy, that had to be one of the worst (most painful) this year! A few minutes, I just sat there, relieved that the removal had been achieved.

When I gingerly got up, the first thing, of course, was TPing. There was not much bleeding, which really surprised me. Harold’s poor old Haemorrhoids were battered and stinging like hell, though! I turned to flush the system, and I did so with no confidence that the dirty great dollop of the evacuated product had the slightest chance of being flushed away, it was gigantic!

To my amazement, everything cleared at the first single flushing? No doubt about it, Constipation Konrad was the easy winner of today’s DESB (Daily-Evacuation-Stakes-Battle with Trotsky Terence, for domination.

I got cleaned up and treated Harolds piles to a wash and gently applied some Germoloid ointment. Ahh, that was good! Unfortunately, I dropped the tube and bent straight down to retrieve it, when I should have used the picker-upperer… The bruise on the shoulder triggered SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley) off! Cragnanglingeckers! 

Now more awake and alert, I returned to get some clothes on, and I spotted last nights medication pot was still full. So I got them taken straight away with some spring water.

Then had a good swig of the damned foul-tasting Docusate Sodium medicine, hoping to avoid going through an evacuation like that again! I remembered to take in the stated minimum of 2 pints (1 ltr) of liquid with it.

I made a brew of Glengettie Gold afterwards. And eat about doing the Health Checks. The Chinese made, Harpin Xian Di contactless thermometer gave a reading in the green again, at 36.8° c. Which happened I noticed when putting in the photos later, was the same as last Friday’s was!

The Sphygmomanometer, Chinese made, and sold by Boot’s, was well up on last Friday, at SYS 178 (158), DIA 84 (76) and the pulse was down at 72 (88). If the SYS stays high over the weekend, I’ll mention it to Nurse Hristina on Monday. That’s a point, will she be calling, cause it is near Christmas, I’ll check the result log for last week.

Ah, yes! I will not miss my beloved, admired, desired, Hristine, the Phlebotomy nurse. Her sweet smile (underneath the mask nowadays, of course), and caring attitude. ♥

I got on the internet, and began to sort out the Thursday updating, and…

I made a brew of Glengettie, had a bag of Frazzles, and got the morning medications taken. Then got the ablutions sorted out early while Mr Fries’ Liberty Global Virgin Internet was dead.

Well, with it being a stand-up session, too ear;y tp use the noisy shower, things went fine! No change of socks until later. A few dropsies, a few nicks shaving. Of course, the medicationing didn’t go painlessly, poor p;d Harold’s Haemorrhoids. Tsk! Other than these, it was an almost normal stand-up wash. The internet came back on (Phew!)

I was just making a start on the blog, and the Iceland man cometh. Looks like I’ve overdone it here?

Hey-ho! I’ve dec,… Hello, a carbuncle or furuncle coming up on the bum I think?

I got the things unpacked and stored away, the fridge and freezer are well stocked once again.

No pain now for fooder, well, garden peas and vinegar maybe. I can see if the mobile shop has any in later on.

I got the minced beef in the crock-pot to cook slowly, then I can add it to the chilli for my dinner this evening, or afternoon, or whenever I get the time and inclination.

When I first put the nice red meat in the pot, it looked delicious.

While putting a few bits away, I nipped back to check on the so-called minced beef. What a colour it had turned to!?!?!

I left it cooking with crossed fingers – not that there were any crossed fingers in the pan like. Hahaha!

I actually got to type some words on the block at long last! Updated some photos, did some comment answering, and sent off the email link I’d forgot to do.

Rechecked on the mince. I had a taste and made some more gravy and added it. I’m now getting a red colour, but only in the juice. This is confusing. Not that I was bothered, it either comes out alright or not. Now I’m getting into the accepting mode again?

I made another brew, Thompsons Punjana this time, and used the milk that had just been delivered. Do you see the size of the bottle? I felt sure I had only ordered a small one.

I uploaded some photos and made a start on this post again. Stopped, and went on Facebooking. Pinterested a snap or two, and back to doing this blog.

The wee-weeing situation was little, and often, there’s not enough bandwidth to keep mentioning them. Humph!

I checked on the Google Calendar to make sure of the foot appointment time.

Herbert joined in with the workers’ chorus for a while. Between them, they actually produced some passable music-like noise, highly commendable. With the drilling being the bass guitars, and Herberts whatever he was using, being the drummer, bass drummer and clanger. When Herbert stopped his tap-tapping, knocking and banging, the noise lost its musicality and became just a ring to put up with. Nice on Herbert!

I persisted with the blogging, took the morning medications. (Well remembered there Inchcock! Hehe!)

The lack of vinegar and tomatoes for Inchies Chilli-Con-Carni creation, dish, bugged me, and then I realised the mobile shop was coming today. I shut down the computer to let in cool, got the three-wheeler trolley walker, filled the box with the small waste bags, and took them to the waste chute.

Got the handwashing done, just two pairs of diabetic bamboo socks. I then got the feet washed, even though I did them earlier, it’s not fair on the toe-cutter; thus, I eliminated any pongs she may otherwise have had to put up with. (Oh, I am a good boy!)

I fought my way out with the trolley-guide, (I can’t understand how I struggled so much, presumably a few mini-dizzies?) I got the bags down the chute.

Then, had a proper performance in getting a lift down to the ground floor. When I did get in the cage, it stopped on the 9th, 7th, 6th and 4th floors, the people waiting at the first three waved me to carry on, not wishing to share the lift, which was fair enough. On the 4th, a chap got in and was telling me that he too had the same problem getting the elevator to stop at his floor, and it took him over twenty-minutes to get this one to stop for him. I felt an affinity with him, Haha!

Down and outside, only a couple of folks waiting for the mobile shop. Angela, who I have missed seeing and talking to, and Josie joined us later. While Angie was being served at the van, her walker guide blew away in the wind, across the road and hit a car parked on the opposite side of the road! I hobbled over with my trolley and retrieved it. I could not see any marks or scratches on the vehicle. Pete, the mobile shop owner, came and collected Angie’s trolley from me for her. Never a dull moment at Windwood Heights! Hehehe!

I got some small apple pies, a bottle of vinegar, he didn’t have any garden peas, and two tomatoes. Not cheap mind, but he has to make a profit. He was selling cars before, but the virus put an end to that. So he got the van and fitted it out, and visits two days, Tuesday and Fridays at the flats for us.

A bit of fame in this photo, for Angie’s husband, Roy. The photo appeared in, of all papers, the Daily Telegraph. That’s Roy at the mobile Shop being served!

Back up to the flat, checked the minced beef. Had a nibble, and it was alright. So I transferred the pot’s contents to the large saucepan on the hob and got the oven warming for later after the toenails had been done, and I can get the part-baked rolls in it.

Got some treats in the trolley, and set off to the Hairdressing Salon. It took me even longer to get a lift down this time! But worserer than that, it was belting down with rain! I was well soaked through, the trolley had rain ibn the bag as did the carriers… miserable feeling!

I sat on the settee in the lobby of Winwood Court, as I was a little early arriving. It took me a while to get down, the settee is far too low for us old folks. Got the crossword book out, but it had got sprinkled with the rainwater, not that it mattered much because I’d forgotten to take a pen with me. Humph!

A minute later, a young lady came out to me, asking if I needed the nail cutting, and she could do me now. The battle to get back up again out of the low settee, took me a while.

After getting all of my details as I sanitised my hands, I was led by Sarah, to a large black swivel chair, with a footstool with extra padding on it. Then warned that the chair was not stable and might move. We chatted all through the few minutes cutting of the nails. Which was super-nice!

They arranged for another visit and booked it for 12th February for another nail-cutting job. A card was given to me, but with me wearing different clothes, I feared I may forget about the cards and putting the date in my calendar.

I thanked the ladies, paid the £25, and as I was leaving the salon, I realised that this was the first time I’d been in any hairdressers for over fifty years! No need to, with no hair on the head, Hahaha!

I dropped the bag off and sat hoping for the rain to ease off, before the walk back to the flats. Deana appeared, and asked me why I was sat there, was I waiting to see her? Told her I was waiting for the rain to ease off, so I didn’t get soaked again. Julie kindly walked with me through the closed walk-through passage and opened the end door for me into Woodthorpe Court, bless her.

Not only did the walk back (green), compared to the walk there (yellow) take less time and distance, but it saved me from another soaking.

My only aim when I got in, was getting the Chilli-Con-Carne done and scoffing it! Put the rolls in the ready-heated oven, and warmed the saucepan. Ten minutes later, I was serving up the feast!

The meal tasted great! Somehow through my faffing about with the seasonings, it came out better than I ever hoped. I wallowed in eating it, masticating slowly to appreciate the flavour. 9/10 for this one!

As I was doing the pot cleaning, one of the infamous sudden bouts of WTC (weariness, tiredness and complete lack of concentration) dawned on me. That was then of my doing or even thinking about anything else, bar sleep!

Stripped and into the jammie bottoms. Plonked onto the recliner, turned the TV on, fell asleep within minutes (Mind you, I needed it aster last nights pathetic two-hour kip), this time it went betterer, I got three hours unbroken rest, before waking in urgent need of the Porcelain Throne.

Hey-Ho!

Inchcock: The ever-awaiting zemblanity pensioner – Thurs 17 Dec 20

♥ TFZers – Oh, Yes? ♥ Hahaha!


Thursday 17th December 2020

Welsh: Dydd Iau 17eg Rhagfyr 2020

00:15hrs: Yesterday’s short-lived, semi-confident, and spirit of a ‘Get-up-and-go’ nature, was replaced this morning, with a, well, how can I explain it? Erm… A sort of acquiescent, compliance, a type of passive acceptance of whatever would be thrown at me today? Certainly not any confidence, rather pliability… I’m sure I know the word I need, but it escapes me. Obviously, the concentration is not too good either.

With a mechanical-like, instinctual nature, I rose from the £300, second-hand, c1968, cringingly-beige-coloured, not-working, rickety recliner, caught my balance, had a wee-wee in the overnight bucket, went and washed the hands, and found myself in the kitchen, putting the kettle on, then back to the main room and started the Health Checks.

As I got the thermometer out first, I realised that the few things I had done so far, had all been carried out almost automatically, no thinking about what, how or why I was doing them. I pondered over why this should be. I could not muster the interest, and I soon carried on with the Health Checks.

The SYS was high again, I must tell the Doctor if this continues for a few more days.

I got on with creating the Wednesday Trip out to Nottingham, blog. That took me a good few hours, but I enjoyed making it, with my humorous brand of sarcasm to the fore in the comments. Hahaha! I got it finished and posted off to WordPress, Emailed the link, then started to update the Wednesday Inchcock Diary.

So far into it, and I realised the number of wee-wees I kept stopping to take? They continued for the rest of the day, too! Made a brew of Glengettie, then pressed on and got the Diary all completed. After several more hours, three more mugs of tea and countless wee-wees.

Sent the blog off, emailed the link. And I went on Facebooking catch-up. With all the photos to get into the albums, this also took hours to get done. But I just plodded on with it. I think I was beginning to enjoy it, and a smidge of contentment was creeping into my psyche.

Time to get the Ablutions done. Not so many dropsies today! The shave produced only two tiny nicks on the chin. The showering had a few dropsies and only one bang against the hand-rail. But the highly cushioned, expanse of blubber around the midriff cushioned it well, although a bruise is developing now.

The only real struggle and battle were with the Sock-Glide again. It wasn’t really worth the effort of using it, but it was too cold to go without any socks on, so, needs musted! Argleboggle!

I tried the old Morrisons PPs today. Gawd they are thin! Later I made a funny-touch-up on the photo of the legs, adding a superfluous fig leaf, as Tim Price suggested. Hehehe!

Thinking over the Morrison let-downs and lousy substitutes, made me think about fodder and what to have for dinner later. Far too early to, but, I opted, to have The baked bean and cheese, and a beef pasty, potatoes or chips, garden peas, and a few of the tomatoes I’ve got left. Of course, knowing me, I’ll change my mind.

Got the ablutions done with, dressed and medicated.

The new third-time worn, brown trousers that are grey, supplied by Amazon and the belt broke already! Oy, Oy, Oy! Surely there must be someone else who leads a calamitous, disaster-prone, unlucky, Whoopsiedangleplop- filled life like wot I do? Maybe not. Humph! It’d be nice to converse with a fellow sufferer.

Then I started the handwashing. Not that there was much to do, another woolly hat, and the socks from yesterday.

I made another brew of Glengettie, I seem to be letting the mugs get cold.

The drilling and tapping noises seem to be all around today. I can hear them like yesterday, in the wet room and kitchen. Now from directly above the computer room. I think maybe Herbert was back at making his train models. Of course, it doesn’t bother me at all. Not in the slightest.

Hello, the sun’s trying to come out. I’ll nip and take some photos of it.

I diverted when I got to the unwanted, thick-framed, impossible to get at to be washed, created by an age intolerant, misanthrope, architect, who designed them this way so he could laugh at us old folk as we fall off of step-ladders need to reach to clean the or see out and down to check if the fire brigade, had arrived yet. Hahaha! Anyroad, I spotted that someone was suffering from a White-Van-Fleet attack! Poor devils!

The sun was doing its best to burst forth. A few minutes later, it broke through, with only the odd break when the small clouds uncovered the planet.

I made an order from Iceland. They are delivering in the morning nice and early. I hope not to need another Sainsbury order. I’ll see what slots they have available for later.

Whoops, no slots available. That’s the end of that idea, then. Can’t be helped.

Still no call for the Porcelain Throne today, yet?

Worrying innit? I fear a concrete torpedo is being manufactured in the innards, and it will be reluctant to move on the next visit… Assuming there will be one eventually? Oh, woe is me!

I had a gander at the local YourArea email magazine I’ve signed up for, to see what the latest Coronavirus figures were for Nottingham. It was not encouraging, again after the  Anti-Lockdown brigade, gang or bloblet of selfish personages had a march together with no masks on, and spreading the virus all over the place, we have an increase overall for the first increase in months, now, and we are being left in Tier Three restrictions!

Of to the Kitchenette to get the nosh arranged.

I took a shot of the sunshine having a last blast. The clouds were beautiful, close little puffers, and distant streaks.

I got the meal served up. It was not like I’d originally planned it to be. For various reasons, no tomatoes left, but I’ve got some coming from Iceland in the morning, providing they are not missing, or out of stock. I’ve run out as Garden peas as well, but I had some processed peas to use, (regrettably, they were horrible!) The planned parties of one cheese and onion, and a beef one, were delicious. The can of potatoes was passable, cause I added some soy sauce to flavour them up a twinge. Added some sauce to the processed peas as well, but that didn’t come out very well. Overall, a test rating of 7/10.

Got settled in the rickety recliner, in search of sleep. But no! Sweet Morpheus was denied me, by the Thought Storming that had a field day with me. What I didn’t worry about, feared, longed for, and was facilitating or regretting, went on for hours and hours.

Groggleknockers!

 

Ecdemomania Inchcock – Wednesday 16th December 2020

Yee-Haa!

—————————————————————————-

Wednesday 16th December 2020

Croatian: Srijeda, 16 Prosinca 2020

00:15hrs: After a good solid 4 hours of heavenly bliss in the arms of Sweet Morpheus, I stirred with the need of a wee-wee, followed seconds later with an urge to utilise the Porcelain Throne.

Thus, the diurnal struggle began, to free my mastodonic, oversized, bouncing flabby-stomached torso from the £300, second-hand, c1968, unsteady, not-working, uncomfortable, sickenly beige-coloured, haemorrhoid-testing recliner. It was a good job that there was no urgency about the evacuations needed, cause it took me a while to get myself sorted out enough to actually get to the wet-room.

I got the central mass of flesh over the end of the chair, rear-end part-way over the cushion, and using the arms of the recliner as an aid, pushed my lumbering body up to get on my feet. Half-way up, and the right arm had a visit from Nicodemus’s neurotransmitters failing, and the arm slipped off of the chair arm, knocked a bottle of spring water off of the ottoman, clouted the shoulder, and the body-mass clumped back onto the recliner! Argh! 

Making things even more severe for Harolds Haemorrhoids, who took the brunt, as I landed, missing the precious pain-saving cushion ring, making the pain somewhat worse!

But it didn’t bother me, I’m used to such things happening, I merely smiled to myself, laughed, and… Oh, alright! I cringed, pulled faces, silently swore, and lay there (I considered crying) feeling the warm wet sensation coming from my beleaguered piles into the Protection Pants!

This caused a semi-panic mode, and I somehow or other got back up, carefully but as quickly as I dare, caught my balance, and ‘Oh, so painfully’ hobbled to the toilet. I wasn’t exactly sure what to do first, but the wee-wee won, as I sat down, I got the crossword book out. As the tinkling from the weak wee-weeing began, I had a look at the first crossword clue, that was as far as I got with it – the rear-end evacuation started and finished in about a minute!

I was flabbergasted! The DESB (Daily-Evacuation-Stakes-Battle) this morning between Trotsky Terence and Constipation Konrad, was a draw. The scene afterwards, looked like could have been from the ‘Hostel’ movie!

Medicated and sanitised the low rear end, and then medicated with the Germoloid ointment. Opened another pack of too small Tena’s I got from Amazon after Sainsbury’s had substituted the wrong sized too-small PPs. That didn’t work, did it! I’m a lucky bugger!

I had a good cleaning up of the bowl and got the old bloodied PPs packed away for the contaminated box. Had a final wash and wiped the contact points, and off to get the Health Checks done. I felt like I’d been up for hours!

Started with the Boot’s sphygmomanometerisationing: The sys was up again, to 168 this time. The pulse was also higher than usual, at 93, this may have something to do with the evacuational problems  I’d just suffered, I expect.

The Harpin Xian Di thermometer read as 36.3°c.

Then I got the medications taken for last night – Yes, I foolishly missed them again! Spurgledamnations! Must remember to take the morning ones later.

I got on with updating the Tuesday blog. Hours later, I’d got it finished and posted it off.

Sent the Email link off. Pinterested a couple of photographs, and launched into what turned out to be a two-hour session of Facebooking! Then went on the WordPress Reader.

Aha, time to do a search of the skies to see if I can see Venus and or the moon. Well, you can’t really see it, I didn’t, but one of them on closer examination of the picture, was there, just! Sqwiggle up close to the photo, screw your eyes up, go about three inches from the screen, and you might see it (Venus?) in the box I drew. I hope!

I made the first brew of the day around 06:30hrs, then took the morning medications, and I did some more updating.

I got the ablutions sorted out. Not a good session, but hardly worth mentioning really. (I lost the page of notes wot I wrote about this, and a day later, it’s all a blank memory-wise!) Chungleblast! However, photos found triggered the memory of the Sock-Glide Battle! I lost 3-0!

Each sock, in turn, gave me exactly the same problems. The uncut nails got trapped in the mesh of the diabetic socks, causing a few tears in the material!

Both big toes, I found out later, couldn’t see them at the time, had the nails so distorted, they bled!

I’ve got new bruises on the fingers.

Arthur Itis and Cartilage Cathy kicked off with the straining, pulling and pushing!

I also found out when putting on one of the new Amazon supplied PPs (Protection Pants), that this pack had considerably smaller sizes in it!

It wasn’t right. I decided to see if I could get an appointment with the Cost-a-Fortune woman who does feet one half-day a week at the Winwood Court. I’ll call in to ask Deana about it.

I got the hand-washing done, wrung and hung. Only did a woolly hat and the pair of yesterdays socks.

I decided in an instant, I would go to town today. (In the morning, I made a blog about this trip to town) chiro

Inchcocks 6th Great Escape from Lockdown

As soon as the Porcelain Session was dealt with, which went tremendously well. Well, a lot of bleeding, but still. I go myself sorted-out ready, in a fashion, and set off on my escape.

Getting out of the door should have told me something, like perhaps, Stay in, this bodes not well! I gave my left for a right stinging crack on the trolley guide wheels. The toenails gave me agony!

I got down to the ground floor and through the attractive, highly decorative, homely lift lobby. Hehehe! Can’t be helped, the decorators are in.

I left through the fronts doors (which seemed a sensible option, Haha!, I am a fool!) I limped along to the recycle bin and put the jars and bottles in it. Then hirpled along to Winwood Court and spoke with Wardens Deana and Julie, asking about the Chiropodist situation. Told me to ask at the hairdressing salon. So, I did! I

I visited the Windwood Extra Care Court’s hairdressing salon. A lady came to me and asked what I was after, and I told her. I was wondering if I could get the foot-lady to cut my toenails? The lady kindly gave me a card when I said I might forget Hehe! Apparently, the Chiropodist only calls for one-afternoon a week, on a Friday. She starts at 13:00hrs. Which is understandable, because she charges too much and doesn’t get too many customers. But Covid-19 has been kind to her.

I thanked the woman, said cheerio to Deana and Julie was I passed their holding and interrogation cell and departed outside.

I took the opportunity to take some photographs of Winwood Court. First a view of Winchester Court from outside the Winwood Extra Care Court.

I then hand a limp around the back of Winchester Court, to take a photo showing part of the Woodthorpe Grange Park greenery.

It was quiet out there, apart from the blustery wind. And I had a mini-thought storm. I pondered on the first time I visited the flats, with a view to my moving in, and my first gut reactions. ‘No way, its desolate, depressing and so out of the way!’ I decided against moving. But when I heard later that there was a bus service, I revisited. Glad I did now! Funny how things change. So many things have happened since healthwise. Getting peripheral neuropathy, having the stroke, diabetes, and then Molluscum Contagiosum, and Atopic dermatitis… I’m so pleased to be here.

The upgrading that started in 2017 will shortly be finished, I hope. And the toes were not hurting so much now. This would soon change into a persistent pain syndrome, the more I walked! Ah, well, serves me right!

I turned to go back to the frontage of the complex. I knew without looking at my watch, that it wasn’t time for the bus yet, not enough tenants waiting at the bus stop.

I got to the shelter and waited, and the first bus, an L9 arrived. Thus started my trip to town and escape from the lockdown! All covered in the blog link above.

I got off of the number 40 bus that brought me home from the tiring, exhausting, Accifauxpa and embarrassment riddled little visit to the town of Nottingham. I got the three-wheeled walker guide, with the three shopping bags of stuff hanging onto it, off of the bus with no mishaps. Took this picture as I made my way to by beloved Woodthorpe Court at the end of Chestnut Walk, it seemed such a long way, so worn to was I. (Poor thing! Hahaha!)

I put the shopping away and got the much-needed nosh sorted. A feast of sorts this one, and contained, Crispy bacon, mini pork pie, ready-mase BLT sarnie, pickled cabbage and egg, beetroot, a Marmite cheese disc, and the last of the potato letters. I suppose it was I felt so drained and was feeling ravenous after the hobbling about, that I gave this an 8.5/10 for flavour! Even though I couldn’t eat it all up.

I got the pots in the bowl soaking, and was soon down in the recliner, in need of Sweet Morpheus more than usual. He obliged! ZZZ!

Inchcock, The Yonderly Pensioner: Mon 14 Dec 20:

    ♥ TFZeress with Decorator? ♥

Monday 14th December 2020

Catalan: Dilluns 14 de Desembre de 2020

01:10hrs: Woke, wobbled out of the recliner, weighed up my balance, and went to the bucket for a weak wee-wee, and wondered why it was so sprinkly, went to get the Health Checks done.

I started with the Chinese built blood pressure machine from Boots, thingamabob, wotsit, erm… ah, sphygmomanometer (I’ve remembered the name now). The SYS was up again, but it’s always up and down lately.

Then onto the Chinese built Harpin Xian Di Thermometer. A near-perfect result this morning. Smug-Mode-Engaged!

Two excellent results!

I took the morning-time medications. The Docusate Sodium Adult/50ml Oral Solution, I shook viciously, before taking a gulp of it, and a Dioctyl® capsule. As per instructions. I made up a 2litre bottle of spring water with some lemon flavouring added and drank a lot of it.

As per the instructions.

Within a few minutes, I had a summoning to the Porcelain Throne arrived. I hobbled to the wet room and got myself settled down on the plastic lid. And before I even did anything I found the clothes I left soaking in the sink to sanitise them, as I grabbed them to remove to the bucket, black bits appeared everywhere?

All around the drain was marked with black and even yellow bits of whatever it was?

It took me yonks to get things sorted out, and I could not remove all of the gunk, despite my best efforts!

Just as well that the calling to the Porcelain Throne was no of an urgent nature. Else I could have found myself in a proper picklement!

Does anyone have any advice on what might have caused this to occur, please?

The session did not go well. Humph! Again like yesterday, there was no movement for ages, the crossword booking was started. (I didn’t get many answers!). The innards were making rumbling grumbling, noises for a long time.

At long last, albeit painfully, the action started. Grindingly slowly! It was accompanied by strange put-putting sounds. Harold’s Haemorrhoids were going through agony! A couple of stoppages and starting again didn’t help. And the end was a messy, gluey job. It was a mammoth task cleaning up afterwards!

Annoyingly, the blood flowed too freely. And the rear-end cheeks were as sore as the piles were! The medicationalisationing was another painful affair. I felt a little disappointed with this visit. But hey-ho, I’d had a fair start to the day.

I got on with updating the Sunday blog. I’d done a lot of it yesterday, so it didn’t take me too long. Plus, Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters, we being unbelievably kind to me, now! Yee-Haa! and Gesundheit!

I sent off the post to WordPress. Went on Facebook catch-up, and answered some comments. Tim Price in New Mexico. Pointed out that Venus would be at its most visible at 06:00 hours this morning, thanked him.

I set the alarm on my new Nokia phone to remind myself. Using my new Nokia 9 Pureview Mobile, with its Android (Pie) adaptability, Corning Gorilla Glass 5, Octa-Core Gold CPU, 4K@30fps, 1080p@30fps, HDR video, USB Type-C 3.1, %x12 MP. 28mm Camera, Bluetooth, A-GPS, Fingerprint (under display, optical), accelerometer, gyro, proximity, compass, barometer, Li-Po 3320 mAh, non-removable, Charging Fast 18W, Quick Charge 3.0, USB Power Delivery. Fast wireless charging 10W, and – Qi Battery. Ahem

I made a brew of Glengettie.

I made a start on this post, and before long, it shot by like lighting, in a flash, it was time to get the ablutions sorted out. But as usual, I had a change if plans when I realised I had the time to spare.

I got the handwashing into bowl and sink, So they would be soaking, for it to be easier for me later, then all I’ve need to do is rinse them out and get them hung.

Clever stuff, eh? Maybe not, then.

Ablutionalisationing Report:

  • The teeth-cleaning was not good, I caught the broken molar that the dentist told me ‘Not to worry about” two weeks ago. 
  • The shaving went betterer, only two nicks, and five dropsies. Although it was a struggle on the last one, as SSS started off as I tried to retrieve the razor.
  • I had to nip out into the hallway because I’d forgot to turn the power-box. (Hard to believe, I know, Hehe!) 
  • I hit my shoulder on the doorframe getting back in the wet room. (Fruggleclomps!) 
  • Apart from SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley), Cartilage Cathy, and hitting my head on the control-box, the general showering went okay.
  • The rear-end cleaning was more painful than usual, that was due to the Porcelain Throne mishap earlier. Hey-Ho! 
  • The drying off did go well, no knocking anything off of anywhere.
  • The medicating, well, it was not pleasant. Harold’s Haemorrhoids went through agony. And the toe was as tender as heck!
  • I decided not to put any socks on, this time. Not that the Sock-Glide scares me, injures me, draws blood and traps the fingers giving out bruises and welts with a smile on its face… Getting carried away there again, Sorry)  
  • I caught the toe against the shower chair. Plainly, being the brave, strong, determined young man that I indeed am, this was of no bother to me… I’ll take that back!)
  • The new substituted by Sainsbury’s PPs for the wrong sized ones were put on… they make me look even fatter than I am, and that’s saying something. Hahaha! I do hope I don’t cough or sneeze, happen they’ll split open if I do! A bit on the small side!
  • (Not really an Accifauxpa, but it was so funny!) Right at the end of this session, as I was about to leave the room, I realised I’d not sprayed myself with the deodorant – and reached for the Brut, flipped the lid with my left hand. Missed catching it as it shot off, the cap flew into the sock glide, bounced back upwards and hit me on the nose, down and bounced off of the sink, and plopped straight into the toilet bowl without touching the sides!  I did larf!
  • The best bit, the Brut can didn’t hit my foot, or torso!
  • Oh, and after I pulled the plug after a final washing of the nails, look what happened. The suds refused to go down the drain hole and came back up the overflow? Life can be so confusing, mind you the alternative is worse! Hahaha!

Minutes later, Hristina arrived. My, well, not just mine, of course, beautiful phlebotomy Vampire nurse came. She was again in a hurry, the poor thing has many more calls to make than she had before the Covi-19 animal arrived. Bless her ♥. She had me done in a jiffy and was off to her next client. She still managed to have a mini-gossip in between. ♥

I got the handwashing in the sink finished off. All done, wrung and hung. Only a pair of socks and a long-sleeve tee-shirt were done.

Then I got on with sorting the waste bags out. The box was overflowing so I must take them down straight away to the recycling and rubbish bins. It became a bit of a task when Nicodemus kicked off, but I did get the mall in the box and put it on top of the trolley, I straddled the big recycling bag over the handlebars.

I got the bag with the Balsamic crisps and Skinny bars in it, ( I’d forgotten to take them the other day when I called in Jenny, Tsk!)

A bit of a balancing act, but I got out into the outer hall, and had forgotten (I’m getting better at doing this lately, Haha!) the white recycling big bag, so returned to fetch it.

I went down in the lift, and, (I do feel a clot) got off on the wrong floor. No floor sign up yet. And didn’t realise with all the decorating going ona weak excuse, but it will have to do, Har-Har! I actually went in the flat’s lobby and pressed the wrong bell! When someone answered the door, I apologised and told the truth of my Whoopsiedangleplop.

Then went down in the elevator to the ground floor, I met Chrissie in the cage, and out into the open air outside. It was good! But, there were no bins out to use! I left the recycling one where the container usually is.

I spotted with my keen, alert, Socratic, sharp, inquisitive Sherlock Holmesian fashion, two fire engines art the end of the road dealing with an alarm at the Winchester Court block. I shall investigate further, later!

I reentered Woodthorpe Court. Observing (Still in Sherlock Holmesian Mode) that someone had supplied us with a Christmas tree in the lift lobby! Bless ’em! It might not be up to the standard of Windwood Court’s, but it is appreciated, whichever kind sole… no, soul, had supplied it for our little community of people who have been locked indoors for so long we’ve forgot each other’s names. Joke!

I rode the elevator back up to the flat. Got the kettle on, and remembered about the fire tenders. I took a snap out of the balcony windows, at least one was still there on Chestnut Walk near the bus turning island.

I think maybe it was a false alarm again. Mind you, we’ve had more actual fires this year than ever, so Malcolm says anyway.

I got updating this post again, and then Dusty’s tune rang out from the door chimes. It was the desirable, ILC, Warden, Obersturmbannführeress, and Desk Top Dancer Deana calling. To do an Alert Alarm test. It was lovely to have just a few words and laugh with her.

Now my fear is that Josie might return the Sunday lunch things late, and wake me up again. Please, that she doesn’t! (She didn’t, Phew!) I must remember to give her the can of gin, I keep forgetting.

I continued doing the updating and later put the ready-made in the oven.

I found this update for Nottingham Covid-19, before closing down the computer.

Getting the meal and bread out of the oven, I suddenly felt a sharp pain from a joint in my finger. I couldn’t believe how painful it was… but within a few seconds, it had gone pain-free? What the heck was that?

Ah, well, I got the meal prepared. Not much hassle to make it tonight. Iy didn’t look overly-attractive, but by gum, it tasted so good! A well-worthy 8/10 for flavour rating.

The pie was a low-calorie Kirsty’s Cottage Pie, with a difference. It had a sweet potato and carrot mash! What smidgeons of mince that was in it, had a lot of gristle in it, but I’m not averse to them and ended up chewing on odd bits that I retrieved, that had found refuge in my teeth, later. Hehehe!

I got the few pots and tray washed-up, took the evening medications, Phorpained Cathy Cartilage’s knee, and gave poor suffering Harold’s Haemorrhoids a soothing dose of the Germoloid ointment.

I settled to watch some TV, (believing it to one of the finest palliatives, in my quest to get to sleep). It worked, the first set of adverts came on, and I was gone, into the land of Sweet Morpheous, and managed four hours unbroken kip.

Outré!

Inchcock Today. Sun 13 Dec 20: The Nottingham Amnesiac

♥ A TFZers posh Hoedown! ♥

Hahaha!

Sunday 13th December 2020

Afrikaans: Sondag 13 Desember 2020

01:30hrs: I woke gently this morning for once. I lay in the same distorted, wonky position I woke-up in and pondered: will I be up to making the meal for Josie? ‘Yes, I feel better than last night!’ Aha, a positive answer to myself! That was a good start! 

Then, of course, the negative prospective-aspects of what perhaps lies ahead came to mind. (It’s my lack of confidence, and track record of Whoopsiedangleplops and Accifauxpas, that take over the mind, you know!) I mentally planned my tactics, of how best to tackle getting the elephantine body on its feet!

As I moved my mass of a blubbering, over-stomached body into a position ready for clambering out of the recliner, I became aware that I may just have been doing some nocturnal-nibbling? The nuts fell out of the folds of my dangling, over-proportioned midriff! Guilty-Mode-Adopted!

 I was most delighted with my success in rising to my feet, with a certain positiveness and lack of accifauxpas or injury. An inner smile began, I should have been warned when this happens! I rose and supported a dollop of fat, that was my torso, as I caught my balance… at that moment, the need for a wee-wee arose, so without doing the one-minute balancing exercise as I usually do, I made for the nearby NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee Bucket).

The swivel chairs metal legs were attacked my left foots big toe – Yes, a Toe-Stubbing!  But not a common or garden one this time, oh, no! Because I can’t get my toe-nails cut, the toe actually stuck my the mail, in the chair leg corner where the metal joins with the plastic! I now have an artistically bent big toenail. It was a bit of a farce, but I got it freed, by then I’d got SSS (Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley), CCP (Cartilage Cathy’s Patella), and BPB (Back-Pain-Brenda) all kicking off, due to the bending I’d done! I’ll see if I can get a decent photo of the toe later when I do the ablutions!

Getting sorted and to the bucket so late, I was caught out by the PMD Pre Micturition Dribble, then the actual wee-wee was so long in ending, I had the AMD After Micturitional Dribble to contend with! I had to hobble to the wet room, wash, change into new PPs, and hope the deodorant I used worked! This was not a good start to the day!

I got the kettle on and did the Health Checks. The Harpin Xian Di Thermometer, gave a good body temperature out, a decent again, same for the third day on the trot, in the green, 36.7°c. Well, at least one things gone right up to now. Hahaha!

The Boot’s Sphygmomanometer then showed up with slightly better readings than yesterday. SYS at 159. SIA 81, and the pulse had gone down to 84. Blimey, two things have gone, alright! It’s worrying this is, you know. I’m bound to pay for it!

I got the computer on and cracked away at updating the Saturday blog. Which took far longer than it should have, due to the presence of Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters, SSS and now they have been joined by Colin Cramps. (A rarity during the morning, he usually and regularly has a bash at me in the evenings?) Things seemed to be getting back to the normal, now – Harrassfull and Annoyingly bothersome!

Not that it bothers me, of course. I’m used to such calamities, pain, failures, embarrassments and the like. I never sulk or feel sorry for myself. Oh, no!

03:45hrs: Finally, after around two-and-a-half hours, so many wee-wees I couldn’t guess at how many, corrections made on the blog, and now, Anne Gyna has joined in with the other ailments, the stomach rumbling and grumbling, that promises a battle against the pain and possibly a victory for Trotsky Terence today, when (if), I do get to the porcelain throne, I got the updating finished!  Bit of a mouthful there, sorry!

I posted it off to WordPress. Pinterested a couple of photos, and sent off the Email link. Then caught up on Facebooking. Made a brew of Glengettie, and took the medications, and made up the evening dosages. And made a start on this blog.

The weak wee-weeing was worse than yesterday, and it was time to empty the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee Bucket). Let’s take it as such, I’ll try not to mention them again.

After a few hours at it, I was beginning to feel cold, so I bravely tackled the… wait for it… the SOCK GLIDE, to get some diabetic-hosiery on to keep me warmer, using the green-beast for the first time in months!

So long had passed since my last being injured with the glide, that I had foolishly part-forgot about why I stopped using the near-human android-like damned thing. Not only is it dangerous, but to me, it’s a simulacrum, almost alive, and vindictive! The lurking adiaphorous nature of it! I swear I saw it smile when it trapped my finger this morning! Of course, this could be due to my losing control of myself, en route to my eventual complete insanity? Maybe also my powers of reasoning, comprehension, logicality and lucidness? Or summat else.

I thought that my tackling this previously blood-letting, bruise-giving, subungual hematoma causing, finger-trapping, vicious green-coloured sock glide, without a helmet, goggles or any leather gloves on, was a heroic thing to do. Mind you, I don’t have any helmet, goggles or leather gloves!

I bravely gritted my teeth and got the first sock on the gripper – as instructed, I then sat down on the bog, and pulled up the frame, causing pain once again. In fact, it caused BPB (Back-Pain-Brenda) to kick-off! I got the job completed, the got the second sock, had to stand up again to get the wear in the gripper… it didn’t go too well!

Not too much blood loss, I expect the bruising will no doubt go down again soon. I got back down, and pulled the sock and frame up and on the leg, getting the gripper to release this time, did cause a bit more bleeding than the first time, from the same gash in my finger. I also dropped the damned glide, it didn’t hurt my already stubbed-this-morning toe that it landed on, too much.

Alright, it hurt like buggery! The finger is still stinging, and the poor stubbed and crushed toe, will never be the same again! Hargledunks!

Taking this photo with the socks on, makes the leg look almost normal, dunnit? Hehehe!

No papules, subungual hematoma, Clopidogrel Clive lumps, the deep vein thrombosis growths, and the ankle ulcer is hidden from view! Only the spider veins and Cartilage Cathy’s affected patella show signs of anything abnormal. Mind you, under the lovely warm sock, it’s a terrible sight! Hahaha!

But I fear not the thought of taking the socks off later, it’ll be a piece of cake for me. (Who am I kidding!) To be honest, after the sock-glide grapple, I felt exhausted. I got the finger ointmentated and took an extra Codeine. The toe can wait until I do the ablutions, there is no way I’m taking off the socks before then. There wouldn’t be a need if I could find what I’ve done with my slippers!

I stopped to make another brew and went on the WordPress Reader section. Some brekkers methinks, pot noodle will do, and another Glengettie brew.

Then, the ablutions had to be tackled. Much later than usual, so I could get caught up with the blogging, before getting Josies’ cheesy potato meal ready. Off to the wet room.

Gordon Bennett! What a good stand-up session that was!

The teeth cleaning was painless, only one dropsy! The shaving, went fair enough, a good few dropsies, but no bother now I keep the short picker-upperer in the wet room! The rear-end cleaning got a complaint from BPB (Back-Pain-Brenda) as I twisted to reach certain areas. Only the medicationalisationing was below par. Poor old Harold’s Haemorrhoids suffered worst. Cartilage Cathy’s patella was a close second, and throughout the morning, I’ve been having Colin Cramps visit the left-hand fingers and hand, just as yesterday, but a tad more severe. So I dolloped plenty of the Phorpain gel on things and rubbed it well in. It didn’t make a blind bit of difference, of course. Cribblebogangonies! 

I was a tad concerned over no movement from the rear end yet, Porcelain-Throne-wise? Mmm!

Oh, I found this photo on the card later, it looks like the belt on the trews? I can’t remember taking it, or why if I did.

I got the hand-washing done, wrung and hung on the hangers to drip-dry above the sink. I made a bit of a mess that called for the floor and sink to be dried up as well. Hump and Thunderglobberisations! 

I then turned my attention’s to tackling getting the Sunday cheesy-potato lunch made for neighbour Josie. And got it ready just in time to be delivered on time, at midday! (I felt a bit proud of ding that! Mind you, there was one heck of a mess to be cleaned up afterwards.

Go the facemask on, and delivered it to her door. I’d forgotten to take the camera with me again, and nipped back to fetch it.

When I got to the door, Josie had opened the door and let me take a picture of her holding the meal tray. She beat a hasty retreat because she was on the phone with her sister at the time. Which is a shame, because she’s not going to get her meal while it’s hot. But no complaints from me. The gal forgets things, like me making her a meal every Sunday and delivering it as near to 12 o’clock as I can. However, I am just as bad at forgetting things, so do not get all het-up about it. Hehehe! I hope she can finish her phone call, while it is still eatable, and doesn’t have to reheat it.

I got back and did the cleaning up from the cooking, and got myself back on the computer.

I found some updated details of the UK figures, on the BBC News site. A bit scary, to see that 21,502 new cases were recorded yesterday! Oh, dear!

I had a search for the Nottingham figures.

I saw this article about the ‘Freedom Rally’ in Nottingham. With so many people working hard to help victims, I find this amazing!

I got the nosh started, and served up.

Beef pasties, tomatoes, Marmite cheese, garden peas, red grapes, and potatoes. A lemon curd yoghourt to follow. I consumed it all slowly. I even had a bag of Frazzles and some nut afterwards!

I had hoped to watch the Peter Sellers ‘The Pink Panther Strikes Again’, and indeed did stay awake for about ten minutes or so, and nodded off at the first commercial break. I woke several times, but only for a minute or so, and drifted off again. I woke up with a start as the end credits were rolling, with the guts in turmoil!

I feared that with me not utilising the Porcelain Throne today, a storm was brewing, of mammoth-proportions from within. I lay waiting for signs of any movement indicative of needing the Throne, that may be in the offing. Despite all the churning and, macerating, noting moved. Which meant I lay there waiting for an eruption than never came. Tsk!

Ah well, no problem, eventually I nodded off once more.

Inchcock’s Escape from Lock-down, No.7, to town. Pictographically

Nervously, I departed, my beloved Woodthorpe Court,

Wondering, if I really ought,

But off I poddled, my expectancies at nought,

Taking my quandaries, feeling relatively taut,

My nerves on edge and tension straught!

The bus-ride was painful and tense, oh, golly!

Feet under the wheels as brakes,

As I sat holding the trolley,

Then I got the nervous shakes,

Sure I would overspend my lolly!

Got to town, and nearly got ran over,

Cold, I wished I’d put on an extra pullover,

A van nearly hit me, moreover,

I swore at the man to show I was no pushover!

I made my way to the Poundsaver store,

Searching for milk tubs, Frazzles and more,

The knee gave way, and I ended up on the floor,

Some ladies, got me up, Gawd I was sore,

They had milk, but I got Frazzles & more,

Paid and left, with a bank balance more, poor!

I had a walk around the City Centre,

Limping now, I felt even ancienter,

The coffee shops looked full, but I’m not a frequenter,

Then one of the Pavement cyclist’s flew by,

If I could, I’d have given him a smack in the eye!

I never saw a policeman. I wonder why?

It looked like rain in the sky,

So I went inside, to keep myself dry!

The Exchange arcade, it was barren of folk,

So many retailers, closed-down, a pig-in-a poke,

Rent £78,000 per annum, it’s no joke,

Service Charge £17,144, what lady or bloke,

Who can afford this? No wonder they’ve gone broke!

The drizzle hadn’t come, so out I went,

Some time in Slab Square, I spent,

Street sleepers, yobboes, arguing, but no police sent,

My frustrations I wanted to vent,

The knee hurting, my money spent,

Getting home to Codeines was my intent!

To the Queen Street bus-stop,

Struggling with my purchases from the shop,

On to the L9 bus I did hop,

Well, struggled, and into the seat did flop,

I was so glad when we got to the Winwood Heights stop!

I alighted the bus, well, fell off of it,

I did feel a right twit!

No injuries, I felt tired, but quite fit,

Off to Woodthorpe Court, I did flit!

Not a soul in sight, for a talk,

So I struggled along Chestnut Walk,

No much thinking en route, the brain had lost its torque!

Into the decorative, welcoming lobby, I did walk!

I tooketh a photo, getting into the lift,

Can’t be accused today, of being a spendthrift!

I’d bought some pressies and a Christmas gift,

I was feeling proud, not peeved or tift,

For once, my thoughts were not all adrift,

There weren’t any at all if you get my drift?

I’d seen folk arguing, and one shoplift,

And yet, I didn’t feel in the slightest miffed!

Frazzled, I’m glad to say – Yes! Hehehe!

Inchcock (In Briefly) – Friday 23rd October 2020: As a defeated-fantasist, I’m losing all hope of anything ever going right again, here!

TFZers Gather at the Cabin! ♥

Friday 23rd October 2020

Welsh: Dydd Gwener 23 Hydref 2020

02:35hrs: A rather abrupt diary today, folks. Medical issues have got be all behind, frustrated, irked and most irritable with life. But there you go!

 After a wee-wee, it was time to sort out the medicationalisticalisationing things to get the Health Checks, medications taken, and Enoxaparin injection is done.

I’d made a cock-up with counting the Sodium needles, so will need to talk to Warden Dean later, to see if she can ring the Doctors and Chemist for me. (to see if the prescriptions have gone out, and the chemist can deliver them for me)

Just getting the injections done, there were two this morning 2x40ml, was a mammoth job. I tried different ways to avoid any accidents in the event of Nicodemus, Shuddering Shoulder-Shirley, or Peripheral Pete’s right leg dancing kicked-off, while I was injecting. I’m sure I had an idea to try something last night, but it’s gone now. Tsk! It all went fine, though. I reckon that yesterday’s pain was cause I was doing it to straight and going in too far. Lesson learnt! The old Boot’s BP sphygmomanometer machine worked perfectly. But the results were far from good. Tsk!

I like the new thermometer. I set it about four-inched from the forehead, and the reading was okay, but yet again I forgot to get the camera ready and had to do it again when it turned of rather quickly and caught me out. A lot of things do that! Hehe!

I got the Nikon camera to take a photograph of the morning view from the finger-trapping, light and view-blocking, rain letting in, deadly for old folks to get at to clean, new kitchen windows.

Got on the computer and had an awful lot of photos to sort out first before I could use them. And between SSS and Nicodemus, along with the worst ever service from Fries Liberty-Global internet crap service, without going down, mind, it took me hours to get the job done.

I was getting all het-up, bothered and angry!

The time was flying by, and it was time for the Ablutions to be done. Everything was taking ages to get done, corrected, and one again. And no calls to the Throne either!

I got the Ablutions tended to, a painful, frustrating task, that left me with a stubbed toe, three shaving cuts, a multitude of dropsies done, and banging myself against the shower chair afterwards, meant Little Inchies fungal lesion started to bleed! Grrr! But at least the ankle ulcer looked such a lot betterer.

The medicating was messy and painful, and I then had to get dressed so I could go out to speak with Warden Deana and got a second stubbed toe as I lost my balance getting the shoes on. Greggleckle! 

I got the waste bags made up and into the trolley, and a coat and hat on, out to the waste-chute, then down on the lift to the caretaker bins. No one around at all to natter to, or even give a good-morning to. I dropped the recycling bag off, and put the empty jars in the Green Glass bin, and walked to the Wardens holding-cell office.

Deana was out working, so I explained the worries over the medications and prescriptions to Julie. It took a while, and the day was shooting by me. I left and took these photos from the foyer in Winwood Court as I got out, then started a hobble back top Woodthorpe Court; but I didn’t get far. I remembered that I’d not left the WC signs, asking people not to put anything down them, other than TP. (The signs were delivered damaged yesterday afternoon by the Post Office, eight days late!)

So, I went back to Winwood Court. And Deana was back from her visits. Lost more time explaining again, and DEan kindly rang the Doctors for me and confirmed the prescriptions had been sent electronically to Carrington Pharmacy. She rang them, but there was no answer. Shell try again later, and let me know the outcome, Bless her. As in the pictures, I didn’t see a soul all the way back home. I was getting more uptight as the day went on.

When I finally got back in the flat, I still hadn’t got yesterdays blog done or sent off. But got the meal going first. I was so far behind now; I got the pictures taken while outside, done first on CorelDraw and put the in the WordPress gallery ready for later.

I took the medications and was about to make a start on finishing the Thursday post. When xyrophobia suffering, over-amour-propred Brother-in-law Pete, who, when searching the flat while I was in the hospital with the Stroke, and taking my valuables, he took a rest. Fatal! He could not resist the electric and played with them. Now the recliner no longer works, rang. Bless him; he was concerned cause he’s not got the link via email for the blog.

We had a good natter, which cost me so much more time to get things done. But I really enjoyed the laughter. Bless, Pete as well!

Then the Porcelain Throne was needed, and it was more painful, nugget-mode, unbelievable the agony, and it was obvious, that Constipation Konrad was back in charge again. Kranklebudders!

Hours late, I got the blog finished off. Sent the link via email. Pinterested. Got the Facebook catch-up done. Started this blog. Too late to continue now, I was shattered mentally.

Went to check the meals progress and the sky suddenly became brighter, got the Nikon and took this photograph. A fascinating cornucopia of different types of clouds and colours combined to offer the opportunity to try and take a photographic gem. Bootiful! Can you see the head and face I spotted, in my tendency towards nephophilia, and apophenia? A fish, dog or a flying monster?

I got the evening tablets taken, and the meal served up. This chilli-con-carne came out a little hotter than the last one, so didn’t enjoy it as much as the te search of sleep.

Amazingly, I was off into the land of nod. But, within minutes… 

The danged Landline burst into life and woke me up! It might be the clinic about the Bowel Scan appointment? The DVT Warfarin about the Enoxaparin sodium injections, the Dentist.. no they wouldn’t ring this late. I’ll have to answer it, Thunderclaps! I’d hope they might ring off before I got to the line, but no. The PKCCP Proximal Knee-Cap-Cartilage-Pain in the right knee had never given me so much pain before, as I hobbled to answer the phone. All that unwanted effort and agony, and what happens? Whoever it was heard my voice and rang-off!

Worse still, could I get back to sleep again? No! Grobognangles! Grobbleknangles! Frangleklops! and Oy-yoy-yoy!

As for the knee’s cartilage pain… Argh!

Ah-well; here’s hoping for a better day tomorrow. (Not spoken as an optimist, more a defeatist fantasist!)

Inchcockski – Saturday 19th September 2020: Frustrations, irascibilities and Murphy’s law ruled today!

Saturday 19th September 2020

Italiano: Sabato 19 Settembre 2020

03:30hrs: Woke wanting a wee-wee, worked my way out of the wreck of a recliner, and wobbled, without delay, to the awaiting wee-wee bucket. For a WUPT (Weak-Unwilling-Painless-Trickling) mode release. Went wearily to wash my hands, checked-out the PPs, no leakages at all last night. And with a semi-imitation, pretend Smug-Mode coming on, I wobbled along to the kitchen, to get the morning’s essentials sorted out, medications, Health Checks etc. and the most important, make a brew of tea. Haha! 

The dang chemist’s tablet packaging was still full of static; tablets had transferred from one pod to others, the pills were sticking to all sides as well (Static?). You should try opening these without some tablet or capsule shooting off somewhere, never to be seen again! No wonder I get confused and take the wrong ones. My thanks to Carrington Pharmacy, 343-345 Mansfield Road, Carrington, Nottingham NG5 2DA, Telephone number: 0115 960 5453, just up from the Lidl store, for the skilful way that they keep my interest and grumpiness alive, and give me something to moan about every month with their late, or incorrect disarrayed, can’t get at, misleading, crappily-packed confusing, mixed-up prescriptions pods. Bless ’em!

Gripe-over!

Sadly, the BP sphygmomanometer machine’s readings for the SYS had shot up again, to 167 now! I keep mentioning this high SYS and showing the photos to the various nurses who call on me, but luckily, it doesn’t seem to bother them much.

On the brighter side, the stick thermometer gave me a decent reading of the body temperature, 35°c, which is something at least that seems to be within the required limits. Hehe! Made a brew of Glengettie Gold, and the need of another wee-wee arose.

I filled in the records sheet for the last one and this on the chart for the hospital, and trotted off to the wet room.

Once in there, after the wee-weeing was done, as so often happens, the Porcelain Throne use was called for.

A real hard to get going job again. The usual nudge of activity, then solid as a rock, so I got the crossword book out and sat in pain as things started to move so slowly, yet ended up with a rush? A right dollop of it, but of a distinctly different construction. I shan’t go into it. The tank had to be filled by hand twice, it needed to flushes before things disappeared down the hole. Tsk! I washed, and filled in the logs.

I got on the computer, and had to make a template first, then got on with updating yesterday’s blog, which went extremely well. There was a lot needed doing, but the ailments were all sparing in their intrusions.

Then I wanted to do some more Lies, Astonishing, Whoopsiedangleplops and Accifauxpas graphics. So got on CorelDraw… and what a farcicalness followed! I was uploading the finished graphics to WordPress, and somehow, Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters failed at just the wrong time, as I selected the options, of course, I didn’t sense it, and I sent the whole folder to WordPress.

Of course, my accidentally trying to load 800 odd pictures at the same time was not my plan, and the programme froze with all sorts of messages coming up from the computer!

Fear was the main feeling at the time. I could not close the programme, the computer would not let me onto the web. I was stuck! After trying to keep calm and work out what could be done for ages, I gave up, and had to turn off the machine! Gawd, this scared me, I was sure that things would not work out right, and half expected the computer and or WordPress, to be knackered!

I didn’t, but I did feel like crying. I left the computer to cool down and let anything Norton might be doing in the background to finish, and had to pop back to the wetroom again for a wee-wee, worry, and stewing in self-pity session.

The wee-wee was one of the messy, VSWAO (Viciously-Spraying-Wildy-All-Over) type. The cleaning up took me ages again. Some PMD (Pre-Micturition-Dribbling) this time, meant fresh PP’s were needed also… and guess what happened as I tried to get the new ones on?

I lost my balance and tumbled over, hitting the already bruised stomach against the corner of the floor cabinet. Knocking things off of it! I did my best to keep my temper, as calmly as possible, IO picked up the knocked-over items, and got back to getting the PP’s on.

This time the 5&@^ing Peripheral Neuropathy Pete, launched one of his involuntary right-leg Neuropathic Schuhplattler dances, and over I went in the other direction. Clouting the top of my right leg, on the feared sock-glide, and spot-on where the small furuncle was!

All this time, I was thinking about the computer problems, and my spirits sank, bile came from the stomach, and interest in everything just faded. So, I wasn’t precisely concentrating as I went to get through the doorway.

Yes, I stubbed my toe on the 3inch gap at the bottom of the door! Suicideworthiness! Claptickleisations! Gragnankles! and Cribblebogangonies! I’ve not felt as depressed, frustrated and worthless for years! But I still needed to know what the damage was with the computer, expecting the worst, I returned to have decker and turned back on my beloved Bang Olufsen.

Everything was working again. How? Why? I wasn’t really too interested in – just over-the-moon! A message from Norton came up, I didn’t understand it all, but it seems they had saved the day for me.

Of course, I wasn’t distraught. Ahem!

A new zest developed, I started singing Adam Faith, and Billy Fury songs as I at long last started doing this blog! Even the wee-weeing so often didn’t bother me, Yee-Ha! I did so far, then went on Facebooking catch-up, WordPress.

The day was well progressed now, after all the fussing about. I lost hours!

I made the nosh. Decent enough, a flavour rating of 6.5/10.

Nipped off for a wee-wee, which was of the CMA (Cloudy-Mini-Amount), added the leaf to the NHS log.

I washed-up the pots, took the medications, and then suffered the zemblanity of a sudden weariness like never before. I got settled down without a wash or any clothes on (sorry about that, it must have brought a horrendous image to your mind, perhaps of dying rhinoceros? Hahaha!) And just lay there, the mind storms having a free hand for hours, confusion when they stopped, mentally and physically drained, and eventually dropped of into a much-needed kip.

I woke up around midnight, feeling much better and perkier, in need of a wee-wee, of course.