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I woke up with persistent jerking in
his morning routine to the left routine… right, left, left, left, right, left in progress.
Then the stabbing pains returned as
joined the action. No choice but to get up, take some hopefully calming but not very good Peptac, and take Lansoprazole early to get it working faster, and tell the Carer I’ve taken them.
I had to remove the nocturnal catheter pouch first, so as not to tempt fate by walking around with four feet of tube and carrying the pouch. Thus reducing the chances of yet another
by tripping over them. The nurse who I was told would come to look at my arm and leg injuries would come on Sunday night or on Monday. Hopefully, she will arrive today.
Then I went to the wetroom to visit the Porcelain Throne. Oh, dear…
Not as sloppy as things have been for the past few days. It started the moment I was seated… it came, and came, and came again. I tried to recall what I had for dinner last night, but my brain was temporarily out of order. And stayed that way all day. And
It was as bad as he’s been in months; this bothered and hindered me all day long. That said, it cleared a little around 20:30hrs, and I took advantage to start updating this blog. Another hectic day for the old man!
Back on the timeline, I went to the kitchen to take a photo of the view. It was sprinkling with freezing rain, and I thought how dark it was this morning. I checked my ‘Cool’ retro clock calendar to find it was only 04:30hrs, and I’d been up for about half an hour. I cussed myself a smidgeon, fool!
So, I made use of the time I thought I’d got, emptied of crumbs, and washed and dried the glass-and-plastic nibble containers. I’ll get them refilled later.
Was still getting at me, so I took an over-the-counter bought Co-Codomal. I’d dosed up well, and the Carer is going to give me some more later.
I then got the Health Checks done. Recorded them and noticed some things, apart from the SYS being a little high, which is nothing new since I got out of the Hospital on my last stay. My temperature was creeping up, although it had been low, so no problem, methinks. The blood results had gone down a bit this week. The urine was a fair bit deeper in colour. And the Whoopsies & Accidents had increased a lot. Today, I dropped more things than I have for… ever, I think. Also
, or to be precise, it was my
. The doctors warned me years ago what would happen, and they were spot on. Neurotransmitter imbalances are linked to various neurological and psychiatric conditions, making them crucial targets for treatment. Imbalances contribute to depression, anxiety, Parkinson’s disease, epilepsy, multiple seizures and Alzheimer’s. It’s only this year that I have started letting go of anything I am holding, and, conversely, there are times when I cannot let go of things. Funny really. The above was printed in 1995 by the NHS. (I found it on the web) Since being diagnosed, I was told there is nothing we can do to mend dead nerves, so they didn’t give or offer any treatments. Then, when I had my stroke. Nothing has been done medically since they released me. Then, when the seizures started, nothing had been done. I had one face-to-face meeting with a neurologist, who said he needs a video of me having a seizure before he can assess the safest route to take. Two weeks later, I had one while a Carer was here, and she recorded it. We sent it to the Neurosurgeon, and I felt I’d taken a step towards getting some help now. That was on November 3rd. Still haven’t heard anything back. The other Neurosurgeon on my 3-week visit to the Hospital told me about the water on my brain. Mentioned the chances of a Trephination. I heard nothing more.
A week before being sent back to my cell… I mean, flat, a Doctor came to the bed I was in with a smile on his face. “Well, we resuscitated you…” I must have looked gobsmacked, I was. “You had heart failure… can you not remember?” No! I wondered if he’d come to the wrong bed? No memories of leaving the ward at all.
The help from the social, half promised in the form of finances, a computer, arithmaphobia, and housekeeping didn’t arrive either.
That’s another thing, no help with the depression.
It took me 3 weeks after I’d lost vision in my left eye to get to the optician for an assessment and for him to refer me to the QMC EENT of an evaluation. I believed it was Glaucoma. Why? I’ll tell you…
When I had the cataract done on my right eye, the surgeon told me I had Glaucoma coming in my left eye. Once you’re over this, we’ll get you booked in for treatment. That was four years ago. So, naturally, I assumed the sudden lack of vision in my left eye was caused by Glaucoma. But, no. The optician said it was cataracts and referred me to the EENT clinic for acceptance. Three weeks later, I got a letter telling me I had been added to the waiting list. If I haven’t heard from them in five weeks, ring them.
Since coming out of the last extended stay in the Hospital after a tumble, I’ve had two more. But they were only visits to the Hospital, no staying in. Last Sunday, I took a tumble. I think a Carer rang the Community nurses. They said someone will call later today, or on Monday morning. A nurse arrived today, Tuesday. I believe that the impaired vision, my now being one-eyed, is making my balance worse, and I’m bumping into more things now. Just thought I’d update you. Hehe! Sorry.
Staying with me nearly all day today.
Could not get a look in today. As if I wasn’t feeling down enough, I had two food orders on the same day, 3 hours apart. I’m scared to open the fridge, it’s that crammed with food. But the social lady is on her way to help me. Huh! I just cannot recall making two orders. The first one, yes. The second, well, no.
The Carer arrived late today, not that I noticed at the time, I’d got stuck into making up the replacement word list. Why? I don’t know, honestly. Yet guilt may have hit me a few times, and I did try to get some jobs done. But did not start the blog until late. It is now well past midnight, and I’ve still got some company.
As I was taking this snap of the view on offer, the Asda delivery arrived. This was expected, and the Carer helped me get the food to the kitchen, bless her.
A good few bags, I’d loaded up with the bottled water again, to keep plenty in to satiate the demands of the Catheter and bladder. Four litres a day as a minimum
Sponge fingers. No-butter butter, yoghurts aplenty.
Chestnuts, sourdough sliced bread, Cheesecakes,
BBW skewers and some mini pork pies.
Visciously strong Ginger beer, garden peas, and the sliced bread, with designer cheapo mini Swiss rolls.
Swiss Rolls; Nothing but the best, they may be the
cheapest, but who else that Asda go to all that trouble to save you doing it with your teeth as you consume these little delicacies? Please note how they pre-crush
these miniature delights for customers. I think I may have overdone it on the cheesy bread rolls and small baguettes.
I pressed on in a depression, building my new word list. If I can live another twenty years, I might get it done to see me to the magic 100. Hahaha!
I got a phone call, but the line was bad again. It was the Doctor’s surgery, where I was told my INR level had risen but was still within range. Adding to keep to the last Anticoagulation DVT Warfarin Clinic dosage until December 22nd. Any new bruising (When have I ever got any new bruising?) I’ve to report it. I forgot to ask who I had to report it to.
The intercom rang forth: “Hello, hello… what now?” It is not the Carer’s time yet? It was the contract nurse who came to take my blood.
Back to the slow, oh, so slowly being done word list.
The computer froze!
I feared the worst (with my luck, it’s only natural). Despondent, I turned off the computer to give it a rest, while O prayed and made a mug of tea.
I opened the fridge door to get the milk, and a load of food fell out onto the floor.
Including the yoghurts – two burst open and left me a right mess for me to clean up. Grrr!
A painful task with all the bending to get at the dessert that had seemingly made a beeline for the corners to run into, and between the cabinet and the cooker. Still, I wasn’t bothered. ![]()
Back to the computer and restarted it, fingers crossed.
Well, it opened, but rather slowly. I opened Excel, then Word; these programmes were even slower in loading. So I used CCleaner and found out the price is going up by 20%. I blame Starmer!
Then I used Norton to clean it again… Well, fancy that. Their costs are rising, and to keep using the cleaner bit on it, I have to pay from now on!
My eyes, well, eye was feeling the strain of so long on the computer,
was getting no better, and now
had joined it. At one time, she was so vicious it hurt, but she’d soon had a brief bit of fun, then faded back to the micro-suddering. Thankfully.
Then I opened CorelDraw, and while it was open, I tried to upload the pictures from Kodak Tim 2. Which went okay. After importing them, whenever I moved one, CorelDraw left a duplicate. This left me more depressed than ever. I turned of CorelDraw.
ARRGH! A Second Food Delivery!
It’s doing this so often, and the self-loathing and inability to stop doing it are getting to me. I’ve been promised help with it, but no one has been.
Fried onions, extra strong cheddar cheese (which wasn’t strong at all!), milk, Sokolow sausages, a jar of pickled tomatoes, and bicarbonate of soda. Out of sight, wait for this… Nine one-litre bottles of soda water! More desserts.
Back to the computer, and the Google browser kept closing down of its own accord. All off, and rebooted. Getting nervous now.
I took a break and thought I’d get the cheeses out of the fridge (Carefully) and plan tonight’s meal. I say
, “Tonight, it’s already morning.” Much to my further chagrin, I found that one of the Moroccan tomatoes had gone mouldy, and two had gone soft!
Cheese, fried crispy onions, caramelised red onions, and thick sliced sourdough bread, well buttered with no-butter, butter was my plan, if I can stay awake.
A super-salad tonight… well, it would have been, had the Moroccan tomatoes sold as ‘Extra Special’ not tasted like sour liquorice! But I’m
afraid they did!
The Extra Mature cheddar was nothing of the sort. The Stilton was super, as was the sourdough bread.
The Polish tomatoes were tastier.
It is now about 03:30hrs, I’ll put the pots in the sink and get down in the £300 second-hand shop-bought, c1966, moth-eaten, bedraggled, grotty, cringingly beige-coloured, much-dilapidated, crumb-containing from my nocturnal nibblings, bug-ridden, itch-inspiring, not-working recliner, and get some sleep.
But, no, not yet.
I felt a warm trickling inside of the right leg strappings. No doubt the fluid was coming from dear old
, and I had to get the socks off and wash them so they would be dry for the morning to use. But by the time I’d painfully got the leg straps off, and found there was a lot of blood in with the pmpth fluid. So I filled a bowl with hot water and Dettol, and washed the feet. No Carer to help now, and I could not get the other medical socks or the straps back on, too painful a job. I cunningly got some cushion leg bandages and somehow managed to get them on as low as I could reach. And got down with a large quilt of my large-bellied body! Sleep came quickly.
,
TTFN
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Had another tumble.
And the catheter bag leaked,
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This one U can recall, first of the day, from the kitchen window. First cloud-free morning for ages. I hae a feeling that I got up and took this one earlier.
Think I took this one next.
Then later, this is one of the almost-barren cars parked at the end of the road car park.
Did the second HC checks in the afternoon.
The tree copse was gloomy to see, and winter approaches; the trees change colour, lose their leaves, and look so sad, as if they were depressed.
The last few minutes of 
Nosh.
urine as I moved. Socks, legs, carpet and slippers soaked again. Got the slippers, shirt, dressing gown and socks off and washed the socks. Got the bowl with Dettol in it to clean my feet and legs, dried off with paper towels. Painful. Taking the
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Welcome to Inchie Today. As per, I’ve suffered so many mistakes and faux pas today, I don’t think I can recall them all, and don’t even feel up to it. Endless problems unsolved, and I can’t envisage them ever being solved or sorted. Depression like never before. Amazon tell me they have delivered my order – they
did. But instead of getting two flat hats and six packets of Bombay sauce, I got two bottles of carpet shake and freshen thingies with some sort of implement wrapped between them. There was no name or address on the box or the clear plastic wrapping on the carpet reshener. Huh! Now I have to find someone to help show me how to inform Amazon. Like most Oligarchs, they make it hard to complain about anything to them.
The day started with the same ailments and confusion that the last six days have, and Dark Darius came on after I’d taken these two, not-so-bad shots of the moon this morning. This quality would usu
Second view photo.
Third view photo.
4-Wheeled Walker Walker,
Multi-Tasking.
Handwashed the wee-wee’d on
Teatime sky, lovely!
Tasty Nosh!
At the end of the day.
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physically, this morning. Confusion Konrad had a grip on me. However, despite these things, I started the day and within 10 minutes of using the Porcelain Throne, guess who visited me? Yes, it was good old, much missed, and very welcome
Off to get the kettle on for a brew of Typhoo. I took a snap from the kitchen. Is that the moon or a light at the back? I’ll try to get another tomorrow.
Warfarin is taken at teatime or in the evening. Nice that my “Baby-Princess” Carer had recognised it was missing. Medications were given, and she applied Phorpain gel to my knees. Oh, and my lower back.
I tried the Doctor’s surgery first. This first call was answered by a Robot-AI. Telling me I was being transferred to “Our Customer Navigator. Beep-beep. Then I was connected to another Robot-AI. Telling me I had to pick a number to press; Press 1: If you are bleeding heavily or have chest pains, ring off and dial 999. Press 2: If your call is about prescriptions. Press Three; I couldn’t make out what the AI said on this one. But as I needed to know my current Warfarin doses, surely linked to prescriptions? I pressed 2 and got through to a third Robot-AI. “We do not accept prescription requests by telephone, Email, and started to tell me the most convoluted email address I’ve ever heard. Obviously, I could not keep up with what the electroid was blurting out at a rapid pace – so I rang off, pissed-off!
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Carer helped with the Health Checks
Early morning shot from the kitchen.
Carers & nurses table.
The catheter leak marks.
Erm… er… erm…
Dropped the toothpaste, bent down & clouted my head on the sink.
the tiredness and weariness brought on by all the hassles that had got to me like never before. But, there were a lot of them, and with me fretting over getting ready to go out, the hobbling, etc… Although for part of the trip, good old
I started thinking of making something to eat, and the landline chirruped up.
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hours.
fridge. No Butter Butter, Polish Sokalow sausages, Extra Strong blue Stilton cheese (Can’t recall ordering this). And some Coffee for the nurses.
Close up of the sausages that I’ve taken a fancy to. It used to be women, but old age dictates fancies now. I rushed this job, because the mess made and bowl, etc,
needed cleaning and freshening post haste.
from the leaking Catheter Pouch.
leaving after telling me they thought I was fine. The ablulance men left this note on the left. For me this note, report, in advice. The usual stuff:
I told him I didn’t need any medications and about the ambulance visit.
I took this sad effort of a photograph while doing the washing and cleaning up. Then, as I turned back to get my four-pronged Fifi walking stick, I lost my balance and went full tilt to my right – thank heavens it was to the right; the wall was there and saved me from another tumble. Phhhew!
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My plans for today were well scuppered, delayed, and, at one point, deactivated. Why? Good question, which’ll be answered.
water tap (faucet) was running, and the water was frigid. Made a brew and got the computer on to check the calendar and change it. And found snaps dated
30.11.25, so must have taken them. They were not very good. I also noticed some fresh-looking spillage on the floor near the fridge.
I also spotted that I had already changed the date on the battery calendar clock.
I got the computer on to check the Google Calendar and see if any critical emails had arrived. I went to take photos of the view.
taken last night with Kodak Tim 2. I was struggling to get it together again. View from the kitchenette window on the right. At least I think it was.
On the left, a shot from the balcony of the end car park, through the window. Where have all the vehicles gone? Mystery!
Kitchen window shot. Catching the sun popping out after the rain clausa dissipated. I just missed getting a seagull in this snap. So I waited around for
them to fly past again.
A little later, when I was taking this shot,
Here is what the box contained. Bombay potatoes! That’ll do me for tomorrow’s nosh. Beet stew & chips for tonight. I’ll need to ask Carer for help in reading the instructions on these Bombay potatoes.
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Another day of gaffes, mishaps, & Accifauxpas. I suppose that these were the cause, reason, for the non-appearance of my beloved and much missed
Assisted by Dastardly Dementia Doreen, letting me down so often, and causing irritations, frustrations, making the day seem to go as fast as a month would. One thing after another.
I hobbled into the kitchen to check on the taps, cupboards and fridge doors, nothing amiss. (Honestly)
As you see, they didn’t exactly come out very well. In fact, they were atrocious.
I got the Health Checks done and recorded on the board, then made a brew of Typhoo Extra Strong tea. Updated the calendar.
she felt that. Gave me a body check. Barrier cream, Phorpain Gelled the lower back and both knees. Medications issued. And said she wanted to call me ‘Bapu’. That is “Dad” or “Grandad” in Pakistani-English; I looked it up later. Bless her. She also checked that the HC figures were written correctly – I’d made one cock-up with the temperature. Tsk!
through the glass… the rain was pouring in through the front windows. The wheeled walkers and two wheelchairs were soaked… I
got a bit wet taking the photographs. (Haha!) I had to take off the dressing gown & kaghoule & put them on the airers to dry.
Back on the balcony to take some more photographs of the rain.
tried to get some to the left side of the balcony.
This one was taken straight ahead to the left of the balcony. Back on the computer, and I got a call on the landline phone, it was from the Doctor’s surgery. Informing me that the hospital had changed the Ramipril Capsules from 15g to 10g, I think he said. Two years ago, I was on 30g. They did the same with the Phorpain Gel: started at 30%, then 15%, and now 10%.
An hour into it, and I smelt the burning chips! No idea why I didn’t hear the mobile alarm go off… (I likely set it wrong, it’s the first time I’ve tried to use it… and the last
time, too!) I salvaged most of the chips, another bad decision that was… they were so hard I had to soak them with vinegar to eat them, and started the gums bleeding. I got them eaten, well, no, not all of them.
Suddenly, as I was standing up to take and wash the dishes…
I stopped for a few minutes of quietism: another mistake! All I achieved from it was feeling more deeply depressed at how life is going. The best Carers have had their calls on me reduced; one does not call at all nowadays. Can anyone tell me if CDB helps with depression?




I do try to be amenable and amiable,
I’d got in six hours of kip! Grrreat!
I took this snap through the glass on the balcony, with rain leaking in through the gaps in the window. Do you notice any changes in parking habits?
As I was taking this view of the uphill gravel path… Oh, no! It’s the newly tarmacked path now, isn’t it?
Aha, got the TV going! A positive Smug-Mode was adopted. Then, when I took the SD card out to put this one on WordPress, I found another one that is a
complete mystery to me. A lot of things are, mind you. 
Nice!
