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Carer Ejaz told me I was snoring somnolently,
When he came to see me, he said I was a somniloquist,
What? I asked after waking, and he told me…
That proves that you are a somniloquistee!
“Ug”… hang on, I need a mug of tea…
And he made me one, a strong Glenhettie,
Ejaz impressed me with his sagacity,
Wanting to hear details of my phantasmagory,
Before I could start, he said to me…
Let me guess, your dream went pleasingly?
You were smiling and laughing audibly…
Talking, swearing, you looked a little sweaty…
Sometimes scowling sinisterly,
You then smiled, so very happily,
You smiled in your sleep, contentedly…
Ejaz: I didn’t want to wake you up, really,
You’d gone from flailing to satisfaction, calmly,
Me: “Yes, I’d just shot Starmer, but not in reality!”
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04:30hrs: The flow-back pains from the dodgy catheter day contraption were stinging away when I woke up. The nocturnal pouch was barely damp; there was so little urine in it! The first thing was to dismount the hospital bed and investigate. As I stood up to bend down to take a look, the flow shot out into the night bag. But not a lot of it. I decided to get the 
tackled. With a 
visit to kick off, then investigate what the dodgy state that the
was in.
Well, a mega-change from this morning’s evacuation, I must say.
Still entirely under the control of
. But not liquified and all over in seconds, as the last three visits have been. Small cubes hit the water without much splashing. Green and Oxo-shaped.
The shaving with the different razors went well. Only two teeny-weeny nicks on the back of the neck this morning. The teeth didn’t bleed at all, I don’t think. Most of the blood came from the gums that had lost their teeth.
I left off doing poor Little Inchy’s Fungal lesion treatment. Until I’d sorted
the catheter out.
Then, I did the other regulars; Ears oiled, eye drops in, Phorpain gelled 
Arthur Itis’s knees, then used the stronger one on 
.
I applied barrier cream to the areas I could reach.
Underbelly, men-breasts, back-flaps, eczema, acne, and Catheter sore spots.
Seemed to be trying to make a comeback again this morning. I hope she doesn’t.
You can see the swelling on the left knee. This is partly due to Arthur Itis, and Cartilage Carol, with Cartilage Chleo in support, who have mangled the knee areas of both legs. The darned Little monkeys!
Walking is a smidge dodgy.
I finished in the wet room and took a snap through the open window of the stunning light blue and pink sky. Nice!
I hobbled into the front room, collected the bins from the wet room & kitchen, and then got everything sorted.
And made one large bag to go to the waste chute.
Carer Ejaz arrived in a good mood. He did a good jon helping me this morning. I felt a smidge guilty in keeping him longer than he should have, and was nervous of missing the bus when he shot off. He’s to make the last call; I hope he catches the bus in time.
The lad helped me get a new catheter bag and a wide strap on. After we’d done it, things seemed reluctant for the flow to start, but it happens sometimes, and it can start a little late. Ejaz told me t ring for an ambulance if the flow does not start again. He put the diabetic socks on for me. Issued the medications; no time left for a body check. That is no bother, I got most of them that I could reach earlier on the wet room visit.
Thanks, Ejaz.
I revisited the Porcelain Throne. It was a short visit. Nothing happened.
But plenty of long-drawn-out emissions of wind!
I pressed on determinedly with the blog updating!
It helped that I had a wonderful two-hour visit from 
. Amazing how well I was doing. Until 
dawned.
Nothing seemed to have changed. Horis floated off, and in came Darius. Ruining my day entirely. A bugger to shake him off, too! I’d been doing so well, but now I realise it was a four-hour session of darkness that I suffered through!
Anne Gyna visited as I started to imbibe the meal.
Carer Mizra called, and the last one was Carer Akeyo. I forgot to ask him to take my diabetic socks off. Struggling and bending painfully to get them off myself brought Loss-Balance-Bobbie and Dizzy Dennis to the fore. So effective they were that I could not get into the hospital bed, just too disorienting and painful.
So got into the second-hand shop bought nine years ago £300, c1966, discomfiting, alarmingly beige-coloured, crumb-containing, TV remote hiding, not working recliner.
.
Evening All!
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and or
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regions, but needed the use of the Porcelain Throne.
which I cannot recall all the Whoopsiedangleplops I had. 
The intercom chirped up again. It was the chap with the Iceland order to deliver. He was soon up at the flat.
He put the things into the kitchenette for me in no time. Thanked him.
.
Just one bag of the Harry-Ramsdens frozen chips that had to go in the freezer, and I had to do some jiggling with the goods in there to make room for the tiger rolls.
the other nurses’ & Carers’ nibble selection on the carers’ table.
Earlier, I got the calendar clock updated. I missed the photo off, 
I also forgot these, taken from the balcony.
The intercom chimed again.
Despite how I was feeling, I still enjoyed this delightfully tasty meal.
I was working on CorelDRAW and felt a dampness on the Catheter leg. I investigate. 
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Morning urine, Ezaz classed as a number 6. Why the heck I put it on the graph as a 4, remains a mystery to me. I need to update the NHS graph, and I’m confident I’ll remember to. Tsk!
Porcelain Throne. Which, as it turns out, I needed suddenly on my way into the room. 
top! As my bum hit the plastic seat, there was what sounded like a splat, which took maybe 5 seconds to clear my bowels… but leaving a distinct feeling that a follow-up evacuation was already brewing! There was a mass of wind during the first evacuation. The minute spent on the Throne was dwarfed by the time it took me to clean up afterwards. 
picker-upperer from the floor of the wet room and then got on with cleaning my teeth. 
evacuation started of its own accord. Talk about lucky, I was. This session was perhaps all over quicker than the first one! That was because it was almost liquid. Making as much mess, though, for me to clean up. Now, 
dawned. I find it embarrassing to say, but I went into an unstoppable, fed-up, mammoth-sized sulk. How do these things happen to me every day?
I felt first, and got Kodak Tim 2, and took a snap. It didn’t turn out too well, but I wasn’t aware of that at the time. I cheered up a little. I returned to the wet room and got on with the cleaning again, almost contentedly.
areas, aftershace on shaving cuts, it’d been that long they all dried solid. Nasal spray was applied to the legs and ankles, using the picker-upperer and kitchen towels. Toothache tincture was used, and I 
Then I remembered to change the calendar clock. And booted the computer.
For an unknown reason, desperation and frustration, possibly?
A letter arrived. We are to have safety checks done on the flats. The workers will be abseiling up and down the outside for four days, checking the integrity of the building. They asked us not to open any windows fully. It’s good that the NCC looks after our safety.
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A day of Accifauxpas, Whoppsiedangleplops, errors, typographical cock-ups, failing cartilages causing a tumble, computer problems, computer cock-ups, medical cancellations, various Catheter Contraption pains, depressions, frustrations, confusion, Gladys Glaucoma vision problems, Anne Gyna stabbings, Tiffany Toothache, and Earache Erasmus. 
06:30hrs: Removed the catheter night pouch from the day contraption.
I went onto the balcony and noticed the usual carefree parking and the mudslide in the end car park. It wasn’t raining at 
the time. 
. I’ve not had any of these for a while, so long that I thought they had had their run. Sandra’s Seizures last longer, sometimes much longer. But this time, I felt it coming on as I shut down the Kodak Tim 2 camera. I stood gazing out the window, trying to focus on the view in hopes of avoiding distractions; an experiment of sorts —and I remained standing, checking my watch as I did so. 
with both hands
, or the times when you just can’t use a tin-opener or knife safely if at all, fit a key into a lock, or even get a plug into the computer or the kitchen sink
I officially HEX the liar from today!
Here comes the food, from Asda,
Sticky & Smokey BBQ baby potatoes,
I meant to order these beer-battered chips,
I can’t recall wanting these on the left…
Half & half, vegan and beef & veg pasties,
Cheesey cobs, from Asda’s bakery,
On Special Offer – LU cookie,
Cleaned and reloaded my nibble jars.
I had two no-butter buttered cobs, cheesie,
I was doing well on Thursday, with updating this blog, albeit late in the day.
I tried to snap it before emptying it. The photo I took did not show the balloon bulge well enough.
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Dizzy Dennis joined in the sensations as I slowly hobbled, with a degree of balancing difficulty, to the Porcelain Throne. It proved to be a messy and extremely long affair. The time spent cleaning up the limbs, bottom, and porcelain was worse because I kept getting dizzy each time I bent down. 
I poddled out onto the balcony to take a couple of shots of the view in the rain, through the windows, of course.
I had to take a shot from the end of the balcony as the innards were gurgling and rumbling again. Once again, 
was in control
Back to the balcony to take a window end shot.
. Hehe!
Ejaz was wet from the rain, poor lad. He got the prescription medications sorted for me and reminded me to take the B12 supplement. No Peptac or Cetraben is needed. As Anne Gyna was on a break, the legs, ankles, and feet that had been fed 
was, for some reason going blurring my sight, almost as bad as she does when I look at the sunshine.
down, the driver arrived. He put them in the kitchenette for me.
As I photographed a selection to go into the fridge, I noticed that Iceland Foods had done it again. 👎🏼The steak slice had a must-be-used-by date of Today!
three from Iceland Foods, the baby potatoes. I had to throw away six of them. (see the photo on the right). They were either split or had black spots near the surface; some had both! 👎🏼When I opened a pack of the shortcake biscuits, they had been ready-pre-crushed for me. The company’s new slogan is Google tells me:
Carer Mizra arrived, also rather damp-looking.
I persevered with this blog. And I got some of the photos uploaded and into the WordPress gallery… this is when, to the best of my knowledge, the first seizure occurred. This was a decent, lengthy one, nothing like the five-hour one I had earlier in the week, but again, I was all over the place mentally and physically when I emerged from it. 
. 
Back on the balcony.
Then, the amazingly dull but still gorgeous sky. Then I’m afraid that things have changed slightly for the worse!
hit me; this was not good.
joined in. Mizra had never seen (or heard) Roger in action before.
call an ambulance. No sooner had he gone than the rain came again. I took a snapshot of it from the closed kitchen window.
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were not pleased with being moved. 
They both gave way together when I got my weight on the floor! I’m so glad they did it when they did, with me having the pleasure of the bed to fall on. It was almost a pleasure. Haha!
the card in the computer when I loaded this one.
The tail end of this tale of woe contains the humorous Accifauxpas. I think you’ll laugh at it!
Ruled the roost. 
dawned on me… there’s only one way to tell you this… I felt something sharp sticking in my bum! Such a surprise that I forgot all about the Cartilage risks and groped to feel what the heck it was… do you want to guess? 
I assume the noise I heard earlier was the toothbrush landing on the shower chair. I had to laugh!
medicationings.
Carer Ejaz arrived. He did a full body check and barrier creamed my ankles and torso. Then, he issued the medications and moved on to getting my diabetic socks on. Bless him!
Now, I recall this one.
This snap was on the SD card. I know when I took it, it would have been in the afternoon while I was out of it. I think.
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Do you remember your girl-seeking soirees?
were acquired. All on the rear part of the neck, so I didn’t see any blood until after they’d dripped onto my back and the wet room floor. 
I returned several minutes later, and the window was not showing, and I cheered a bit. Then I noticed two Google thingamibobs were open and was unsure which to open.
was making his teatime call on me!
It’s a late afternoon snap.
Ahem!
Teatime.
A little later.
Closer shot of the same.
Seizures kicked in while eating this.
on the job every time I woke up. But no long twitchings, they stopped almost as I stirred.
, 
, one 
even 
had a couple of turns.
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With cooked beetroot and battered mashed potatoes.
Two Natorra tomatoes left to have later.
from the day pouch, and from then on, I started so many tasks in a short space of time and made many errors. 
For example, after I started sorting the waste bags out. Got three bags into one and intended to do the other two. But no, not me. I found myself with my head in the oven cleaning the racks. I say I found myself because obviously one of the seizures had got a hold of me; the last thing I remember doing before this was taking the first bag to the door. And was going to sort the front room bins. I looked in the room, and they had not been done.
I reckon it caused me a bout of vertigo as I removed the shirt from the sink to the bowl. No need to tell you, but I will: I dropped the bowl, water all over the floor and me, and the monitoring station came through to tell me the water leak alarm had activated. It took me a minute or two to regain my balance sufficiently to reach the monitor.
Throne duties done.
as before I’d shaved! 
went okay. And… I got the fresh PPs on without any falls, stumbles or droppages! 
A Caregiver arrived, and I remembered that I needed to hang the Kagoule on the wetroom shower rails to dry. So, after the carer had medicated me, I got another kagoule washed and hung it up with the other in the wet room.
to the chute yet. 
traps on my fingers or my hand. And no walking into the doorframes. 
2.
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Mine was Christened as Wilhomena.
Meet Gladys. The only car I could get. But, four-door, and the front seats went all the way back to accommodate room for a bit of nookie. It was well used over the next three years. As for anything mechanical, I wasn’t too interested.
After this time, the Mini-seizures played catch-up and many sessions of their favourite game, ‘Let’s confuse Inchy again’.
The catheter bag was dried using paper towels. Then, the usual procedures were performed: the fungal lesion on Little Inchie and the ankle, acne and eczema, and eye drops. I olive oiled the ears, etc.
I can’t even remember taking these two.
Let alone when. PM, I assume.
Natoora tomatoes and Chinese-flavoured belly pork.
Early evening view.
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Ocado Oder arrived.
Daffies for the gals.
Food for me.
Drinkies for me.
More food for me…
Even more for me!
I don’t know much about what’s going on Today.
This morning’s shot.
It’s looking better, healing already. And a lot less painful.