Mystery Rib Pains

Inchy’s Ode: Saturday 7th June 2025

/ Inchie / 8 Comments

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I recall when life seemed concatenated, 
When Mother left no questions unanswered,
Except when she was in prison, then it’d be Dad,
When the grass was greener, the peace peacefuller,
Folks either deeply religious or had Zeusophobia,
Serious & farcical things were confabulated, 
Doors unlocked, yards were ungated…
Saucepan bottoms were copper-plated,
Boots-crappers & doorsteps were washed,
We got more than money in gratifications,
A pride when we got it right, no bonuses,
Oh, yes, there were many sybaritisms,
Some innocent, playful, many a teaser,
No need for drugs or booze to find pleasure,
Things changed so fast as I grew older,
No doubt the world’s grown absurder,
Time runs out for passion and adventure,
Stopped the death penalty, 1964, November,
Now, it’s daily murder after murder,
Which is not suitable for a worrier,
Scarier, now we have elected Starmer!
How can he claim to a PM that’s Labour?
Keir’s anti-pensioner, farmer and worker,
I reckon he’s also a misandristic anthropophobic,
The truth, reality? He’s totally denialistic,
Starmer the dangerous, spurious, demagogic,
The word to describe him is bisyllabic!

HINTS AND TIPS FOR WHIPPER-SNAPPERS,
ON POSSIBLE UPCOMING HEALTH RISKS,
Kicking off with a duodenal ulcer,
Optician, dentist, hearing aids, then a Carer,
Life gets to treat you uncaringly & unfairer,
Oh, you’ll get shot twice, I did, in 1986, September,
See how easy it is to distantly remember?
A new mechanical Aorta Valve for the ticker,
A Stroke that took me ages to recover…
Sent to a nursing home, not again, please, never!
Then, Cartilage agony & Peripheral Neuropathy,
Which will later be reassessed as being FND,
Went deaf, got Anne Gyna, then, this frit me…
Dementia, Psychoneurosis, Incogniscent Impairment,
Neurotransmitter went out of alignment,
My brain not reading the messages that they sent,
My nerve ends are unable to be acquiescent…
Visa Vera, to the instructions the brain sent!
That’s why I find myself on the floor, amazed,
I went to bedlam to be further appraised, 
Had many of these for the Dementia, I was aghast,
Diagnosed Lewy body dementia,
Then, Alzheimer’s diabetic Dementia
Then it changed to vascular Dementia,
Next, possibly Frontotemporal Dementia?
But the last one was not even Dementia…
PreMordid Cognitive Impairment, more tests, I fear,
You may suffer more; all anthropogenic,
You’ll need to keep medications, antileukemic,
You’ll need drugs, alcohol or mayhap tools alembic,
The world’s end will not necessarily be atomic,
Afford a spot in a shelter; it’ll be claustrophobic, 
Any faiths left will likely be Oligarch or Druidic,
Meeting your end, try to be rhapsodic…
I can get cannabinoids, CBD all synthetic,
Then you can die euphoric, cause you lived pilgarlic!
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Another short on detail job. Another day of being with it and out of it! Called twice on me, though. It’s time for a third visit, I hope.
Of course, my regular can-be-certain of well-outdid Horis.
I had several mini-seizures while Carer Mizra and then Carer Manpreet called. When talking and subjects change, it is impossible to get back to what I was going to say. Although Carer Mizra has an excellent memory and helped me regain some things that had slipped permanently into oblivion. Hehehe!

Classed as an NHS 6 on the scale.

First view from the kitchenette window.
A smidge bleak looking.

Off to the Porcelain Throne.
Which gave me plenty of time to tackle the crosswords. I didn’t do too well today. I found three errors from yesterday, but I was unable to find the correct answers to a single clue. Humph!
I went back to the kitchen to gather the necessary items for my ablutions… . Only to find I’d left the danged flipping hot water tap running yet again! A bit of naughty language was involved in the self-lambasting that followed.


I dangerously had to carry hot water from the kitchen sink on three trips so I could have a shave. No accidents, and only one cut shaving under my chin.
One more water trip and I got back to the wet room with a bucket of hot water, enough to use in the stand-up scrub-up, safely… !
I stubbed my toes against the porcelain pedestal. Smack on the ingrowing toenail toe! It hurt so much more than usual; I think this is not a good sign.

Somehow, as I was doing the medicating, a headache like the one from yesterday kicked in over the same left eye and up onto the top of the head. Then, the depression joined in, and I kept going into reality and out of it and carried on all day. I was a totally different idiot than the one who woke up two hours ago! Concentration crumbled.

I took a snap of the much-change view.


Went to change the clock calendar and make a start on the Friday blog. Carer Manpreet (I think) arrived. I got lost trying to keep up with the conversation, as it constantly shifted between subjects. Manpreet, a pleasant gal, issued the medications; I asked for Peptac and an extra 30g of Codeine. The headache had now been joined by Anne Gyna on one of her more virile attacks. This only confused me further.
I think I’m getting the timings out of sync again. Manpreet came well before I went on the computer. Sorry about that. I’ll carry on if you don’t mind. We shared farewells, and the gal departed. I must try to concentrate. I got the computer out of sleep mode, determined to get the Friday blog finished early. 
I didn’t, of course!

I started on the blog. Then, I realised I had no clean nightwear, so I had to wash one out for the morning.
So, I did

As I started once more to finish the blog, neighbour Jenny 🍪🌺💗 came in with some bikkies for me; bless her. Now, things got even worse. I had completely forgotten about the blog and started searching the web for Birds Eye Potato Bites. Ocado had some online. But I don’t need an order yet. However, when I invested, I found that they were cheaper than J Sainsbury, which does not sell them for delivery; they are only available in-store. However, Ocado was selling them for £10 for 5. £2.52 a single pack. I made an order for the week after next – I hope they are still on offer then.

Then, as I got back to starting the blog… The Catheter Contraption supplies were delivered. I put the box on the bed (and forgot about it; it is still there).

Then, as I got back to starting the blog… Carer Mizra (I think) arrived. I honestly can’t remember much until the evening; I went into a confused state of grade 1 mode, baffled, basically.

Can’t recall taking this. Rain again.

Remember the lady who does my hand laundry who didn’t turn up last week? She arrived. The good bit is she was not poorly, but on holiday and forgot to tell me about it. She took all the dirty nightshirts with her. I have two left, one of which will have to be washed each day until she brings the others back. I’m so glad she was not ill; bless her.

PM shot, I presume

Mizra and Rosma did the Carer calls today. (I think)

I found this on the SD card.
Possible Friday or Saturday meal.
No, this is Saturdays. I remember using the last of the potato bites now.
And burning my finger as I was getting them out of the oven and dropping the tray on the floor.
Ah, it’s coming back…

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I MUST CONVINCE THE DOCTOR I NEED HELP – Hehe!
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Acci-Whoopsies Sat 8th Feb 2025

/ Inchie / 6 Comments

HAVE A GREAT DAY
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– ANOTHER GREAT RESULT! –
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Do, do-do-do
Do, do-do-do-do, do-do-do
Do-do, do-do-do
Do, do-do-do-do, do-do-do
Do-do, do-do-do
Do, do-do-do-do, do-do-do
Do, do-do-do
I’ve Morphine for the pain, just singin’ in pain,
What a glorious feelin’, I’m drunk once again,
I’m laughin’ at clouds, on Amitriptyline,
The sun’s in my heart. I’m on Simvastatin,
Beta-blockers ease the pain all over the place,
Come on with the tablets, a smile on my face,
I’ve been down to the lobby six times & again,
Just laughing, & smiling, I must be insane!
Dancing, laughing at the pain
I’m happy again…
I’ll cope and smile at the pain,
I may flinch cause the pain is a bane!
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There were so many shooting awakes, but every time, I seemed to drift off back to sleep almost straight away. 
I think I amassed around 6 hrs shut-eyed, all the same. And welcome, it was, too! I lay there feeling somewhat confused about a dream I’d had. It didn’t make any sense. I scribbled some things on the notepad and may use this for the ode on Sunday. I’ll see how things go.

Dismounting the bed had some good and bad aspects about it this morning. 
The nocturnal catheter urine colour was a seven on the NHS chart. But no cotton-wolly bits were in the pouch. That was a plus! Also, no flow-back sensations when I emptied the bag. Another plus! A third plus was & did not give way throughout the standing up and exercises! Fair enough, Chloe caught me out later and all but had me over! The only hassle was from . She was determined to ruin my morning, to start with anyway. She did a fair job, too.

Of to the kitchen to get the kettle on. I foolishy opened the window to take this snap on the left of the morning’s view. What happened then? I’ll tell you… , several of them within a few minutes. It’s not a good start at all today.
1) As I clicked to take the picture, my foot hit a bottle of sea salt on the floor, breaking it as it tipped over. I then acquired a pleasant-smelling wet left slipper, sock, and foot. I cleaned up, sorted things and checked the camera. The shot seemed okay.
2) I went to the fridge to get the milk out. I dropped the carton, which didn’t burst open but did leak on the floor, and the same previously sea-salted slipper, sock and foot! Now slightly stickier than they were before.
3) The bad one! As I bent down, using
for support, the end rubber slipped on the not-yet cleaned-up milk! I didn’t go over, but it went much lower than planned.
A Porcelain Throne motion started of its own accord! Oh, lucky me!
At first, I dared not move for fear of a torrent bursting out at any time. After I decided, I just had to beat a path to the wet room. It was already too late to get there on time! 
. Frustration, shame, self-pity, inner anger at myself, self-hatred, and a flow of curses and self-blame rang out. I felt worse after having had the same problem the week before last. And this time, the mess I made was even worse. I was glad I wasn’t wearing any trousers at the time. I used the mop and bucket for half an hour and went to the kitchen to change and get fresh and disinfectant water. I wasn’t pleased! I was wheezing a bit, and the stabbing pains kicked in at full power! Eventually, I things and myself cleaned up and freshened and returned to the kitchen to make the brew of tea…  Number 4: To find I’d left the hot tap run, and it was now stone cold! So, I cannot shave and shower until the water heater comes back on this evening.
I’ve had better mornings!

Carer Promise arrived. He was in a good mood. We looked up to find the name of whatever tablet I took to counter pain. We found it was the beta-blockers. Bisoprolol Fumarate. We also found that Glyceryl trinitrate (GTN), a short-acting nitrate that can be taken as a tablet or mouth spray to relieve angina pain. That may be the one they stopped me taking because of side effects a few years ago. I can say that the beta-blockers are not cutting it at the moment.
There I go, moaning again. Tsk!

I got the computer on the go.
By Gawd, it’s going so slow.
But so was I, like an armadillo.
Then I got rumbling below…
Back to the wet room I went!
I can report that after an original kerfuffle, I got to the this time in time! !
Again, it was a really messy evacuation, but all the mess ended up inside the WC this time. It was almost a pleasure visiting this time. Mind you, this is the first time in over a week that I’ve taken two dumps in a day. I took two Anti-diarrhoea capsules earlier, which I’m glad I did now.
However… on leaving the wet room, I turned and fell over the mop bucket I’d left out after cleaning the mess up this morning. I managed to get back up using the WC. But I cracked the plastic lid in the process. More expense and hassle to go through.
A feeling came over me that many words could describe: Foolish, incompetent, unequipped for life, pathetic, useless, hopeless, inadequate, deficient, imbecilic, incapable, 
thick-as two-short-planks and foolish come to mind.
Pick one. Any would fit me or even all of them.
Did you notice I am getting a little low? Haha!
Depressed is not a sufficient word to cover it. 
I’m moaning again. I’m sick of hearing myself!

Carer Joanne called to collect the laundry for me; I’d be lost without the help I got. ♥

Well, I’ve been at it (awake) for about 12 hours now. I’ve been swamped all day, achieving next to nothing. Unless you count having a series of silly, embarrassing, and frustrating and sorting them out and making some cracking cock-ups, all I’ve done is blogging. Mistake-ridden, but never mind that. It’s all part of this chronically embarrassing nature of this Saturday. I’ve just had a thought… I wonder if the dream I had last night, which I can’t recall, was trying to warn me of events that occurred today?

Well, the Carer is due, and I am hungry. No point in making a meal yet, to be disturbed while eating it again. So, I’ll go onto WP Reader and look at the Comments first.

Carer Promise arrived. I begged him to find out about posting the parcel for Tim P. He said he would help me, and he packed the parcel. He will finish the job on Monday or Tuesday.

I updated this blog up to here.
And made a much-needed strong brew of Co-op 99 tea.
This shot should have been on earlier, but I missed it.

Late postal delivery arrived. It was from my good cyber friend and excellent photographer, Tim. To replace the broken Kodak.

The same model that had broken it got the blotches on every picture taken.
Thanks, Tim. I appreciate it. Having the same model should help me figure out how to set it up!

Then, I sorted out a meal.
But this one wasn’t!

I watched two FA Cup football Matches in about 200 parts. I kept nodding off; they were on an advertising channel, and I drifted off every time they came on. 
Gave up in the end and wanted to get in bed, but Tiredness Terry & Fatigued Frank meant I slept in the second-hand, £300, c1968, overwhelmingly sickening beige coloured, tatty, uncomfortable, wobbly, germ-producing, falling to pieces, food residue collecting recliner.
Constantly waking up with either  or pains twinging away.

A painful day and night today!

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Evening… or, Morning Each

 

Inchy: Saturday 1st February 2025

/ Inchie / 14 Comments

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My situation could be described as delicate,
So many concerns it’s hard to navigate…
Worsened by not being numerate,
Although I’m not yet nonliterate,
I talk to myself, and how do I reciprocate?
My cerebrum needs to reorchestrate,
If Doreen Dementia would only vacate,
Maybe then, I’d no longer verbigerate?
The norovirus is making me ululate,
I still cannot manually voluntarily urinate!
My confidence & abilities absquatulate,
Hopes, plans & desires are all abirritate,
Needs that vary every hour assimilate…
Single thoughts, problems, will bifurcate,
It’s my personal choices that I berate,
I’m getting myself into the right state…
At 10 o‘clock, I could self-strangulate,
Complete shame, disgust, and self-hate,
Depressions by the hundredweight,
11 o’clock, I’m impossible to humiliate!
My worries, & fears, I did incarcerate,
The Enoxaparin, which I did inoculate,
Which left me with some stomach-ache,
But I was worry-free to compensate…
Others, worse off, I was compassionate,
Twelve noon, my joy did regenerate,
Up & down, it’s hard to hariolate…
Then flow-back came from my prostate,
This time, I reacted not as an ingrate…
Lots of folks have more worries on their plate,
The ailment with which I have to cohabitate,
Leaves me confused, incoherent & inchoate,
These good moments may well be inquorate…
But they are so precious, mate…
My situation, as of now, is not so delicate!
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Great Results This Week!
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After hours of complete failure to sleep, I gave up and got up at 04:00hrs. I kept changing from the bed to the c1966, £300 charity shop bought second-hand, wincingly grotty, beige coloured, not working, crumb-covered from the nocturnal nibblings, itch-making, uncomfortable, virus-breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, recliner, and back again.

There was not a lot in the nocturnal catheter pouch. But it was a beautiful colour even if it was too dark on the NHS colour scale (It was a 7). Note that this indoors-set shot hid the blotch very well on the black bit!

I got the waste bag to the doorway, then went to take some morning snaps from the kitchenette window. It felt bitter cold as I opened the window. Then, I had to change my plans again. The innards indicated it would be wise to visit the Porcelain Throne. So, I did!

Yet again, it was a close call that I got to the and seated in time!
The evacuation couldn’t have taken 30 seconds at most – but the follow-up motions, which were all liquid, took much longer to escape. I dared not move until I was as sure as I could be that they had finally finished coming. The cleaning up of my muscular, firm, lithe little rear end took me ages. Then, the Porcelain cleaning and deodorising had to be done.
The medicalisationings had some moments of humour. Is that the correct word to use? 
1: Taking off the PPs, as I tore down the seam, I caught the top catheter gripper with my broken fingernail; this caused me to tug at the tube stuck down the poor and now painful . Naturally, the blood flowed out all down my leg and foot and onto the wetroom carpet and floor. Naturally, the pain didn’t bother a man of my youthful calibre; I did not swear, spit, or howl out. Although the cleaning up and all the bending kicked off , it really annoyed  .
Of course, I just laughed it off!

Anne Gyna’s pains were not on at this stage, which was very welcome. After about an hour of cleaning up the mess, I continued with the medicationalisationings. Harold’s haemorrhoids were Germaloided. The colossal belly folds, underarms, and back fat  were barrier-creamed. Then I did the eye drops and spraying.

2: I got the olive oil dropper to do the earholes next. I assume I had not cleaned the barrier cream off my hands properly; The bottle shot out of my hands, hit the wall, bounced back to fall on my toe nail, with the oils spread all over me, then the floor I’d just cleaned! I saw the funny side, and I did laugh!

3: Now joined in the grief & agony-giving party of ailments. I cleaned up the blood again.
  4: With more bending and pulling, it opened up again. Humph! I take these , and in my stride, you know.

Hours after my first attempt, I got snaps of the morning view.
A sort of brownie-green hue to go with the 07:50hrs photographs taken?
I tried a closer-in shot of Cavendish Vale. That’s the road with the suspiciously first snow-melting roof tiles on the left of this picture. Hehe!

Carer Precious made the 08:25 and 11:25 hrs calls of the day. He tried to sort a camera out for me, but it beat him. It was nice of him to try to get it to work for me, anyway.

I got on with updating the blog. Soon got it posted. Shame about all the time lost in the wet room farcicalness, else I might have caught up with it. Har-Har!

Carer Joanne called to collect the hand washing for me. She’d been off a long time with the Nocovirus Flu. She’s not back to her normal self yet, and it showed, bless her. ♥

I was annoyed with CorelDraw again, and the computer went so slow that I feared the worst! However, after CCleaning it, it got a smidge better—but not on CorelDraw.

I got the ode done and dusted for tomorrow – yes! In front, at last, I thought. Until I realised that I had not completed all of the templates. Then I recalled having a series of frequent but short bursts of the other day and must have thought I’d done them. So, back to catching up again.

I took a snap through the kitchenette window. The top right is a gloomy-looking view, complete with ‘the ‘Persistent Blotch’ showing. It’s easier to hide when taking night shots cause the blotch blends in the darkness and is less conspicuous. 

The waste bags had not been taken to the rubbish chute yet. So, I took them to the rubbish chute. On my way back after depositing the bags down the tube, it gave way. No tumble or fall, though, just pain. Hehe! I smiled at it and whistled as I hobbled back to the flat. 

Around 16:00hrs, the Co-op food delivery arrived. I’d stocked up with the cheesy bread rolls. I’m rather partial to these. I also got some ready-made beef and caramelised onion sandwiches. It was not cheap, but I was feeling idle and tired and had no sleep lately. I added some cooked smoked bacon, chicken thighs, German smoked cheese, & sliced tomato to the sarnie and overcooked battered onion rings. Well, I like them browned a little. Salted the sliced tomatoes. Nice! Complete with semi-hidden blotch! A different Carer did the last two calls.

I’m getting miffed about not getting any sleep in. I watched the football highlights, then nipped through the channels to find something to watch. I moved from the bed back to the aged, grotty-looking c1966 made, charity-shop-bought, horribly beige-coloured, £300, Harold’s Haemorrhoid-testing, non-operational, acne-giving, virus-breeding, rickety, easy-to-fall-out-of recliner. But it made no difference to the sleep deprivation until I turned off the TV at 03:00hrs. Sometime then, I nodded off! Yes! Waking up coughing and sneezing at 04:00hrs!

I gave up and got up!

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CHEERY-BYE!
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Inchy: Wednesday 29th January 2025

/ Inchie / 12 Comments

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I once had hopes of understanding Aristotle,
His views seemed inevitable, apodeictical,
Which led me to study causations, aetiological,
My lack of education drove me apoplectical,
My efforts all failed, confused & pathetical,
Depressed at my failure, I tried phenobarbital,
My studies, & results sadly turned pedantical,
I gained an appreciation of beauty, philosophical,
Accepting my abnormalities as psychological,
The black & whiteness of life turned quixotical,
My inner thoughts turned into a vague quiddle…
Understanding others’ problems became quintessential,
My thought processes turned quodlibetical,
Decisions taken? Some, primarily quasiexperimental,
Asleep, awake, I’d stutter & gabble.
My brain turned into a tangled graticule,
As Dementia began to rule, I turned gullible…
To graceful, grateful, then gladiatorial,
Confused by numbers, figures, things horological,
Life came hazardable, unhealable, not hearable,
Things hopeful, humourful, became hurtful,
With no control, events results became happenstantial,
Why, where, whom, which, when… are now idiopathical, 
Problems insolvable, inconcludable, not influenceable,
Hopes, dreams, permanently imprisonable,
Some things remain so impressionable…
Nature, the trees, the sky, the bramble,
The daisies, bluebells, mankind’s burial,
The fish, the birds, even the dung beetle,
I fear the oligarchal & bureaucratical,
The politicians are so bribeable!
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Oh, flipping ‘eck!
Sleep is back to being accompanied by no less than . None of my usual tricks to shut him up worked. I tried guzzling soda water from the soda bottle. Nope! I moved from the hospital bed into the c1968, non-operational, tatty, scruffy, unkempt, uncomfortable, germ-breeding, Harold Haemorrhoid-Testing, catheter-tube-yanking, sickenly beige-coloured recliner. Nope, no good! This made him worse by lambasting away at my problems and faults! Grumph! I turned the TV on, which seemed to annoy him more than ever! This grinded away at my confidence. He’s been leaving me relatively hassle-free these past 6-7 nights. He’s back now!

I gave up and got up; my balance was in good condition as I released and emptied the Nocturnal Catheter Pouch. Then, a summoning from the innards to visit the Porcelain Throne arrived. So, I did! It was a Trotsky Terence performance similar to yesterday’s. But masses more of it!

I’m doing well with the Health Checks this week. Carried out the medical cleaning and medicationings. This cough medicine tastes horrible. Haha!

Computer on, & updated yesterday’s blog & posted it.

11:20hrs: Carer Kimberly came to do a finance and appointment check visit. Starting with an email filling-in form (At last! ) to make an appointment with the Dentist. It was made for Tuesday 11th February. Then I asked her to inform the District Nurses of this appointment in case it clashed with their appointment to change the Catheter Contraption. A good job I did, too, cause it did clash. They rearranged their time for Monday 10th February. I put these down in the Google calendar to be on the safe side. During the visit, the grinding dry cough returned. I fear the Influenza Norovirus is returning again. This is the last thing I need… but it is!

As departed, I had to rush to the wet room again. Another mega-messy mammoth dollop of an evacuation was taken! During the evacuation hit me, and it took me a while to get back up on my feet; then, it was a struggle to stay on them. Oh, dearie me!

I will try sitting down and getting some obviously needed sleep catch-up. I didn’t work, of course, but I took my mind off the ailments by watching an episode of ‘Heartbeat’ on TV. Then sat through a second episode, with little outbursts of the damned coughing and the occasional sneeze.

Influenza Norovirus is returning again!
Back is the sleeplessness. Sore throat. Cough. Utter weariness. I tried to get some sleep and ended up doing nothing but watch TV, drowsily but no sleep as such for the next nine hours. During which two carers came. Richard was one of them, and Precious the other.
Confusionableititus Reigned.
Not in a good condition.
Sweet Jenny phoned – she has a camera I can use, bless her, she’ll drop it off tomorrow for me.
Bless you, Jenny! ♥

I gave up on getting any sleep and got up around 04:00hrs to find I’d left the computer on, and I am now getting blue memory warnings on the screen.

May have trouble doing the blog.
I’ll try to get the ode done on Thursday if nowt else.

TTFN.

Inchy: Monday 27th January 2025

/ Inchie / 6 Comments

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Perhaps it’s time I was adulterised? 
I won’t qualify for being apostolised,
Too late for me to be activised or adrenalised,
I’m considering being re-alcoholised…
I’m no academist, a failed accordionist,
A mistake-maker? I’m the most awesome!
I’m not a Blairist or a Bonapartist,
My thoughts on Starmer are by bloodthirstiest,
As PMs go, he is undoubtedly he’s the brutalist,
Farmers & pensioners are his biggest bigotries,
I wish him cancer, pain and blepharitis,
While I’m at it, add brainsickness…
I have/had each of these ailments & sickness,
His stealing of my fuel allowance made me stressed,
My hatred can no longer be suppressed,
I’m a sceptisist, while he is a lying Satanist,
To Labours’ lost Cor-Values, he is a sacrilegist!
If he’d be kind enough to die. He’d be so unmissed!
He’d expect more backhanders in heaven’s mists…
Where dead pensioners & farmers resist…
Welcoming him with headbutts & fists!
But my guilt will not be vanquished!
Or should that be unvanquished?
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07:10 hrs: I stirred, woken by a grinding chesty cough, Dizzy Dennis, with Twtiching-Neck-Nigel trying his best to detach himself from my torso. 
Realising the time indicated that I’d slept the longest night for over many weeks, 8 hours! The phlegm-clearing continued for a few minutes longer.
Then I remembered that the Ocado order was due between 07:00-0800hrs; & I worried in case it had already been and I didn’t hear the intercom. 
I took off the nocturnal catheter pouch, a 7 on the graph, and as doing so, the door chime rang out. At first, I thought it must be the delivery, but Carer Richard came in. I was coughing away, so I took a swig of the cough linctus. 
Gawd, it tastes so foul! Eurgh!
Richard looked slightly tired at the end of his first shift back at work (naturally). He checked the medications and recorded the shortages, which were issued today. The last of the Anne Gyna Painkillers was taken. It will be a painful wait until the lad orders them from the doctor. She electronically orders replacements from the chemist, and his average delivery time has been three days up till now. So, a possible four days ahead without any help getting any ease Anne Gyna.  
I turned on the computer to check the time of the Ocado order, and it arrived as I was doing so. I put the things away and took a can of Mighty Malt that someone told me to try to perk things up a little. I drank it while typing this.
Then, I tried to sort out yesterday’s colossal error in making the templates and storing them out of order. What a Plonker!

COMPUTER CALAMITY!
There I was, doing well with the blog updates.
Suddenly, the cursor went blue, and I could not type anything else in the blog, ode or word list. After pressing the Esc button, I got a new email browser. I closed it in the same pickle as the other one. I tried various combinations of Ctrl Win & Alt buttons. All to no avail. I closed the computer, saved what it would allow me to, and selected “Restart Windows.”

At 11:40 a.m., Carer Chloe arrived.
A new full-sized Blue Screen came up. Options offered; 1) Open in Windows 10 browser. 2) Close this computer
3) Contact the MS engineer assistant line and another one 4) that was so technical it had me beaten. Chloe wanted me to press Number One. But I had set up Google as my browser. After getting myself even more confused, I closed the computer. Waited a few minutes & restarted again.

I was baffled but pleased to say that it was working!

RETURN
I’d been half-hoping she may have gone on vacation for a nice break. But, No! Silly me!

Carer Promise did the last two calls for me. Medications were given & diabetic socks were taken off. On the last call, he remembered he’d forgotten the prescription Medications. He nipped down and fetched them. Then, attach the nocturnal catheter bag. Thus, he saved me a lot of agonies when the Anne Gyna meds ran out. Carer Richard’s planning and Precious saved the say again.

Anne Gyna did her best to get at me again, but taking two of the tablets must have disappointed her aims.
Ranolazine & Beta-blockers at the ready!

A night of broken sleep patterns again, but I soon nodded off again each time that and/or woke me up. Yes, DD is back!

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Skol!
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Inchy: Friday 24th January 2025

/ Inchie / 8 Comments

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Talking to Doreen Dementia communicably,
It has never been or will be very easy.
Cognitive Impairment Iris is another problem for me,
Avoiding things depreciatory or derogatory…
They both warp my limited etymology,
It annoys them when I get stuttery…
Why? When I’m communicating mentally,
I appreciate that I stutter verbally,
Especially when I talk aguishly nervously…
I’ve disabilities in physical & mental functionality,
This is just a barely-bearable reality,
A by-product of Peripheral Neuropathy,
And having the stroke, regretfully,
The brain moves between agony, self-hatred & complacency,
It seems my neurotransmitters have lost choreography.
When the Neurosurgeon hacks in cerebrumly…
In my brain, what will he see? An electric melee?
My surviving nerve ends, as confused as me?
Or Doreen & Rita, having a cup of tea, bizarrerie,
Deciding how they can attack me… bloodcurdlingly,
Can he drag them out using keyhole surgery?
Maybe they got in when I had my appendectomy?
They’re illegal immigrants; they didn’t ask Inchy!
Annoyingly, my pre-op emotion is one of apathy…
They get pleasure from Mind-Mangling, you see…
But how did they get at me? Serendipity?
I have to suffer their Satanophany, frustratingly,
If this op fails, will I be brokenhearted? Hardly!
I’ll show no displeasure or recalcitrancy, 
I’ll be in cloud-cuckoo-land, & thankfully… 
To the surgeons, nurses, & staff at the QMC,
And go back to my life’s mental hurly-burly,
Where my own thoughts lack authenticity,
My memory is beyond any help or assistance,
Self-worth and good luck show imperceptibility,
To my struggle with mental mobility,
My ailments gift of physical disability,
Glaucoma Gladys makes my vision foggy,
Shaking Shaun keeps me feeling groggy,
Anne Gyna, currently the epitome of agony,
Catheter leaks, leaving my leg & slippers soggy!
The morning ritual of cleaning things that are bloody,
Little Inchies Fungal Lesion; he’s also sticky,
Eye drops & sprays, lip balm, cream the piles, that’s dodgy!
Yes, back to the flat of milk and honey,
Computer, mobile, and TV troubles, not funny…
Where I’m perceived unsympathetically,
The mini seizures, Leg dances, Twitching-neck-Ali,
Where I’m assured of being ignored & querimony,
And of Fauxpas & Whoopsiedangleploppery!
And await my Glaucoma op, & retinopathy…
And the everyday hassle from Arthur Itis, Not Askey!
The terrible twins, Catheter right, Carol, left, Chloe,
When they go, at best, you’ll fall on one knee…
Which always sets off a reaction from the FND…
Arthur Itis, Cartilages Carol and/or Chloe,
Sometimes, the Catheter pouch will blow!
The tube in Little Inchie yanks; you will never know…
The pain entailed cleaning & medicating with Opzeluro,
My right testicle swells to the size of a baking potato!
Still, I don’t like to complain, though!
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I had a lot of bother in the morning trying to get this blog started. I’m starting to get all het-up now.

I got 3 hours kip in, though. Ye-Haaa!

It’s now Saturday, and it’s 19:00hrs! So this will be short.
Otherwise, Saturdays will never get started. Arghh!
Sorry about this. Not coping well.

The new ailment that I thought was the Cartilages… now I don’t think it was. Several times when the knees gave way today, both went together. Terrible sensations. From the ankles, knees and up to the thigh. Everything wobbled, and the instant weakness and balance loss all but had me over a few times. Actually, it did have me over once. But I crumpled conveniently onto the second-hand, c1968, eyesorely-horrendously grungy beige-coloured, £300, charity shop bought, crumb-retaining, microorganism-microbe producing, gungy, moth-eaten, beige-coloured, non-working, bacillus encouraging, incommodious, Haemorrhoid Harold testing, c1968 recliner.

The nocturnal Catheter Pouch was classed as a No. 8 on the NHS Richter Scale Card. Hehe!

Carer Sherida called. She kindly removed the socks that were not done earlier and suggested I ask the next carer to put the fresh ones on. She checked to ensure that they were diabetic ones for me. This way, I could get a proper shower and medicalisationing session early.

I struggled to finish the show and was dubious about my weak legs. Constipation: Conrad was still in control of the Porcelain Throne duties. There was a smidgeon of blood, but it was hardly worth mentioning. The shaving: I thought I had done a good bloodless job. I got under the shower and used the shower chair for the shower session, which was well over an hour. Then, I ensured all the needed treatment areas of my magnificent, muscular, youthful body were well dried, drying the Catheter bag and tubing simultaneously.

Then, as I was getting on the dressing gown, I felt all the hairs I’d missed on my neck hole when shaving. I was a midge annoyed as I got the tackle out and gave the neck a go over again. The bleeding took me ages of time and half a bottle of Brut aftershave to stem the flow. Humph!

Carer Sherida took the laundry bag down for me. Pound to a penny, the bag gets stolen, or the clothes disappear again.

Carer Sam did the midday spot.

Carer Precious Called. I mentioned the low quantity of the Anne Gyna medications, and they told me they had been delivered.

I feel I’m going to go through pain like never before after the tablets run out on Monday.

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TTFNski!
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Inchy: Wednesday 15th January 2025

/ Inchie / 8 Comments

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INCHY’s ODE
Called on by an acquisitor, investigator or burglar,
We deal with far too many an abrogator…
A Prime Minister who gives us apepsia,
Virgo Keir, who astrologers say is a charmer?
Who’s open to a bribe and/or backhander,
I’m sick of him saying his dad was a toolmaker.
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Always something needed to clarify, certify…
Actions to decertify, destinkify, degunkify…,
Secrets, errors to reveal, declassify, demystify…
Questions, who, when, which & what’s the fee?
Higher, lower, how, who, too few, too many…
Will the earth die, with no petrol or electricity?
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Keir hates farmers, & those on a pension,
Bad times for those with a medical affliction,
And for proletariats with ambition…
Why Keir’s not a Tory is beyond my comprehension,
As is his lack of socialism and compassion.
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Some people can’t walk, hear or see…
People get addicted to drugs & go alcohol-free,
Some act naturally with hatred… aggressively,
Vandalism & bullying is annoyingly scary,
There’s a lack of control & abstinency,
Folk act violently to antiquity & authority…
We’ve known this was coming for years… sadly,
The world’s end, I mean; then we’ll all be free!
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04:30hrs: I stirred but without the usual jumping and jerking. This was replaced this morning by .
Well, it made a nice change for me.
I got the removed and felt the need to check the kitchen. I had doubts about the verity of my last night’s checks on the state of the taps, stove, food fridge, and freezer doors. Apart from the kitchen looking a mess, I need not have bothered. There were no running taps, stoves left running, or taps (faucets) left on. I used the old camera (not that I had any choice left now) to take photos to see how they would come out. Oh dear!
I took a wash and utilised the Porcelain Throne. At least the passing of the evacuation was far easier than when was in charge. But it was super messy and needed a lot of cleaning up. Which I did! Then I olive oiled the earholes and cleaned and creamed the   affected left eye and lids. Put the lip salve on the mouth. Ointmentated the knees to help hopefully keep down the pains from ,    and of course, . I’m glad to say it has eased off already. Then, I did the nasty bit, getting the cream onto . Arghhh! I just laughed it off, of course. Ahem!
I took some shots with the old camera, hoping to improve on yesterday’s earlier ones. As I opened CoelDraw and prepared to import, she gave me a dose of her moving pains in sequence. It felt as if it was running amok. I was close to pressing my wristlet alarm, and as I was getting ready to, things calmed down tremendously. It didn’t stop or anything ridiculous, but it was entirely bearable. I was collating the pictures and saw the one that I did last night. Here it is;
I noticed the marks on the right-hand side. Then, I realised with the aid of the spyglass that it was all the way across. I hoped that today’s photos were not going to have it on them. All of this morning’s efforts were below standard for many reasons.
Odd hue?
Blurry.
The hallway that was taken with the flash on?
Disappointing, to say the least.

I had to try again after I’d got dressed.
Well, the night shot wasn’t too bad.

I finally made a start to yesterday’s blog update. There’s not much to do, so I posted it off, too!

arrived in good spirits. Medications were given, but she forgot about putting my diabetic socks on for me, I asked her to as well. But I was in a bit of a seizure at times, so my fault. I’ll ask her when she does the financial help visit. 
I got around to cleaning the used files and making a start on the graphics for this blog.
Made her second visit. I was deep in a mini-seizure again. I recall bits of the call. She opened the email, only one of interest from the bank. It was filed in the box. The email help went good, I sense. A questionnaire was done, and other things, but I can’t recall what they were now.
Ah, I asked her to ask the Wardens if they had made the loss of Bank Details yet; I was not rushing; I just needed to settle whether it was being done. said she would ask them and let me know. Bless her. 
But I heard nothing. I assume that ILC (Independent Living Coordinator), Oberstgrüppenfuhreress Warden and Primo Ballerina, Warden Deana, and ILC (Independent Living Coordinator) Generaloberstess, Ice skating champion florist and Warden Julie were not in the office when she called.
I forgot about the diabetic socks again!

I’ve got this out of order. I think it happened earlier in the day.
The J Sainsbury order arrived.
I tried the camera again.
I took one of the things the driver had put in the boxes for me in the hallway.
Some of the delivered goods were photoed. A pack of Protection Pants, JS’s own label, are on the left of this first photo. This includes air fresheners, shaving foam, razors, and food bags.
Nigerian Garden peas and sliced red onions went in the fridge.
I think I’m missing some photos.
So I looked at the SD card, but they are not on it. Does that pee you off? Well, not you, but it does me. Humph! The photos were not very good, were they? If I can get the passwords from the Wardens, I may consider contacting the bank to see if I’ll be allowed to buy a new camera. Then again, maybe not. Waste not want not!

I’ve decided to have the same dinner as last night because I have some Sopocka left to use and one of the rolls to bake. I won’t have tomatoes, though; they are horrible this time of year. I think I’ll have some sauce, though. 

OH, AGAIN!
The peristency of them got to me.
I put the Community Nurses folder with the telephone number on the stand, so just in case, I’ll remember where I put it. And it’s written in large letters on the front of the folder.

Decentish shots to the left of the kitchenette window were taken here, methinks. I do a lot of that, thinking... I do a lot of gorgetting, as well. Possibly a little more than thinking and remembering.

Then, I took this fairly good photograph to the left of the kitchen window.
This camera! The lousy shots, then decent ones. I must ask Tim Price what a ‘P’ on the camera selector button stands for.

Cut off the attacks instantly. She’s not been back since the same time that replaced her as the primary ailment of the moment. I’m fed up with this change all the time. Still, it makes for variety, I suppose. The cracked lips are improving, and not a single volt has shot up my right leg for three hours! Great!
Well, I’m sick of listening to my own moaning!

Cracking on with this blog, and I heard a noise through the Baby Monitor – but could not understand what was being said.
I got the wooden walking stick and went to the door. Opened it, but nobody was lurking. Luckily, as I turned around, I hit my shoulder on the door frame, which gave me some grief. Had she not, I would never have found the packet that someone had put on the top of the heater. It was the top-up prescription that Carer Richard had ordered for me on Monday. The chemist had popped it through the door without ringing the bell. Again!Hehe!  I walked to the kitchen to put them in the medical drawer; a beautiful night view was available. Carer took a couple of shots, hoping to catch whatever it was high in the sky. Was it the moon? It was so tiny. It might have been Jupiter or Venus? But if it was either, where was the moon?
You can only just see it in the sky in these pictures.
I also wondered what the red thing was in the top photo?
These came out reasonably well.
I took them all with the ‘P’ options selected. The inside photos didn’t come out as well, did they?

The Carer lent me his camera on loan!
I took the following shots and those in the morning with it. Well, he took the first two tonight during his last visit to me. I’ve got it until midday tomorrow. It’s being collected. So, on Thursday’s blog, the only shots will be those taken in the morning.
I told him I was nervous about dropping my Canon, and he said, No problem. You can buy me a new one—smilingly!
With my record with cameras, I am sooo Weary!

Well, it’s late now and time to make myself some nosh. Oh, no! I’ll answer any comments on WP Reader first.

Eventually, I got the nosh made.

I didn’t make it into the bed. I tried to stay up late to watch the football highlights on the BBC. That didn’t work, of course.
I drifted off about five minutes into the footy. Woke up about an hour after the programme had finished.
And went back into slumberland!
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Sayonara
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Inchy: Tuesday 14th January 2025

/ Inchie / 9 Comments

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What are you? What kind of achiever?
What would you be if you weren’t a skiver?
An autoworker, auctioneer or autobiographer…
An archiver, aspirer, or an awe-giver?
Backpacker, baker, ballbreaker…
Banker, billposter, beggar or bedmaker?
Cheesemaker, contractor or counterfeiter…
A Chauffeur, croupier, or courier?
A grave-digger, drug-taker, drugmaker…
Murderer or some kind of doctor?
Lift engineer, mayhap an Egyptologer…
Driving test examiner, an art exhibiter?
Fortune teller, foot-soldier, or fraudster?
A gardener, food gatherer, gamekeeper?
A house-sitter, work on a Helter Skelter?
Interpreter, inventor, or interviewer…
Ironmonger, investor, immigrant importer?
A jailer, janitor, jitterbugger, or jester?
Kindergartener, or a kettledrummer ?
Lamplighter, lawyer, or do liposculpture?
Microbrewer, or full-time Father/Mother…
Microbrewer or full-time malingerer?
A weed-neutraliser, maybe narcotrafficker…
A military officer or a Newspaper obiter?
Paperhanger, photographer, prize-fighter…
A pilferer, plasterer or psychobabbler?
Quantity surveyor or quartermaster?
A reupholsterer, a Brexit renegotiater…
Maintain a roller-coaster or racketeer?
Schoolteacher, or work in a shoe store…
Be a seismographer or a speechwriter…
Market stallholder, mayhap a speedskater?
A BP sphygmomanometer operator…
An actor like Arnold Schwarzenegger…
Possibly become a stripteaser…
Streaker, shoplifter or stationmaster?
A trumpeter, toastmaster or toymaker…
Toreador, tax-gatherer, world traveller?
A uranographer, become chairman of Unilever?
A passport validator, or maybe a vintner…
A furniture varnisher or a beach voltigeur?
A basket weaver or a whoremaster?
Work for Starmer as his yeasayer?
A politician and or a Parole Boarder?
You’ll learn how to be a freeloader,
A bullshitter, wanker & hobnobber,
Backhander-taker, hatemonger, & hornswoggler,
A farmer & pensioner-impoverisher!
If you fawn to & backhand Starmer…
Your career will eventually stutter…
As the end comes for Herr Starmer,
He’ll blame every pensioner,
He’ll blame every family farmer,
He may lie his way to be a survivor?
Starmer’s an excellent scammer & schemer,
Did I mention how much I hate Starmer?
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I awoke this merry morning and pottered about, photographing the nocturnal pouch and a few morning views. Then, after an hour or so, I realised I had not taken any falls, walked into anything, or dropped anything. My bleeding groin area was far less painful than yesterday, and the shave was a bloodless affair. Of course, medicating was as painful as it usually was.
But overall, it was a fantastic start to the day. I was expecting my beloved Nurse Hristina to call to take my blood. Apart from medicating the lesion, I naturally sang away as I launched the computer to finish yesterday’s blog.

I soon had the blog done and posted. (Still singing away to myself as I plodded on). I went on CorelDraw to prepare for up, loading the ten or so photographs I’d carefully taken.
DANGKNANGLES!
The Kodak camera had taken only two of the pictures! The first one had gone into the ether.
The second, the collated waste bag, was on the SD card. The card was in the camera; I recall taking it out and into the computer thingy, but there were no more shots!
BUT NOTHING ELSE!
I went to check on the tiny inner file. Nothing was on it.
I retook some shots of the views, ensuring the card was back in the Kodak. I took several snaps.
When I returned to upload it to the computer, nothing went through. Then, I noticed the camera did not light up when I put it on again. Stupid me!
Obviously, the batteries had died.
I put in new batteries and tried again. Nothing
RIP to yet another camera!
Then, how did it take the second shot but not the first or those that followed? Was it all a part of the mysteries of the Woodthorpe Court’s Sinister Spirit’s master plan? To raise the devil, spread wonders, blunders, rodomontades, fears and descenders from the comfort of semi-sanity, with me almost in a good mood, into a gibbering wreck!

I spent hours trying to figure out what had gone wrong. I got six more batteries and replaced the first ones I had put in. No, there was no life! Then, I put two batteries into the torch, and they worked, eliminating the dead battery idea.

A break for my mind when Nurse Hristina arrived to take the blood. It’s lovely when she comes. ♥

Two caregivers, well the same Caregiver, came twice; Carer Chloe, one for medications, and one for domestic.

I settled for a photoless blog (All bar the one); I had no choice and insufficient cash yet to get a replacement.
Depressed, dispirited and pissed off, I started doing today’s blog ode, then the top graphics.

I kept looking at the camera, thinking it must be something I’d done wrong. But it was a no-go every time I tried. And I tried so many times, sort of hoping!

At my lowest point, when I had the least interest in continuing the blog, it happened: Ailment number four kicked off.
Flared up. My confidence faded, my depression got more profound, and the roaming chest pains settled in for about a solid five hours this afternoon, well into the early evening.

What a last three days I’ve had. The two tumbles on Sunday, thanks to the bleeding from the groin par, put the mockers on Monday. Tuesday and the Kodak broke my heart by packing up on me. And gives me hell. I suppose I could order a camera from Amazon… Ah, I did that last time, so I must have one somewhere that is battery-powered… A futile spurt of hope arose!
I searched everywhere without any joy in finding it. Slowly, it dawned on me that the camera had been dropped down the waste chute while I tried to take a shot of the tube inside when it was first fitted.

I’m going to get something to eat and think about my situation. I heated a part-baked long cob with tomatoes and Sopocka, using no butter, butter.

I changed my mind and looked at the cameras on Amazon. They were far too expensive. I’ll wait until my pension goes into the bank and how much there is before spending to get a better one. Or give up altogether.
This reminds me that I still can’t access the bank account until Warden Julie gives me all the details she kindly took to sort and print out for me.

The carer came and examined both cameras. He said they were both dead, but the cheap one may work if I recharge it. It’s possible that the connection was loose when I recharged it yesterday. So, I charged it again, ensuring the plugs were solidly in place and the blue recharging light lit up.
No medications were needed. He removed my socks, picked up a drink and nibble, and went home.
Thanking him.

I was settled to watch TV when I remembered I had not eaten anything yet. I went through a hard battle against my desire for sleep and got up to make a meal. I got as far as the door, and in the dark, I could see the flashing blue charging light on the camera. So, that told me that the camera was fully charged when it failed. I took it off the charger and meandered into the kitchen, and after making my meal, I tried to take a photo of it.
GOTTEN HIMMEL It Worked!

I tried again on the evening view…
Wunderbar!!!

Note: The morrow morning, all pleased with myself, I used the miraculously working old camera again.
You will see the disastrous quality dip in the quality of the resulting pictures on Wednesday’s blog. I was very disappointed. I may get better results late in the day, but I think that is because I have more misled hope than faith.

Gluckliche!

Saturday 11th January 2025

/ Inchie / 7 Comments

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A FULL BREAKDOWN OF KEIR (Pensioner Killer) STARMER’s £84k OF FREEBIES

Sir Keir and wife Victoria beam after bagging free £4000 Taylor Swift tickets: In summer 2023, Sir Keir was treated to a week in accommodation for four people in beauty spot the Gower Peninsula worth £4,500.

While planning his lies-ridden election triumph in July, Sir Keir welcomed many gifts and hospitality with open arms, including designer clothes, glasses, and tickets to several football matches. Keir and his wife, Ms Reeves and Rayner, also received donations for work outfits. In June, the deputy prime minister, Ms Rayner, received a £3,550 donation for work clothing from Lord Alli. Rachel Reeves £380k freebie and payments as she scrapped pensioners’ Winter Fuel Allowance.

In October 2023 and February 2024, he was given £10,000 and then £6,000 respectively from Lord Alli.

In April, Lord Ali gave Keir £16,200 for ‘Work Clothing’ £16,200.

Sir Keir has also received accommodation worth £20,437 between May 29 before the election and July 13 after the win.

Lord Alli treated Sir Keir’s wife, Victoria, to approximately £5K worth of clothes. The clothes are understood to have been at Lord Alli’s £18 million London penthouse, which would have cost £444 per night if he had stayed there daily.

Accommodation for four on the Gower Peninsula. Set up by Rod Lloyd. Value: £4.400.

Arsenal fan Sir Keir received tickets and hospitality totalling around £19,000 for twelve football matches from August 2023 to June this year, including nine when his beloved London  Arsenal team was playing.

Sir Keir enjoyed a Taylor Swift concert in the Premier League. As for social events, Sir Keir was one of five Labour MPs who declared freebies at Taylor Swift concerts.

The Prime Minister declared the gift of four hospitality tickets from the Premier League to see the Shake It Off singer at Wembley Stadium in June, at an estimated value of £4,000.

Sir Keir also received four tickets to the Jingle Bell Ball with hospitality from Global Media and Entertainment Ltd. last December, worth £800.

In May, the National Theatre treated Keir to four tickets to see Nye worth £358.

The only freebie not accepted was a bottle of Vinegar from Nottingham blogger Inchy. Rejected when it was discovered it contained arsenic. Value: 49p

Sir Keir’s Football Freebies Since August 2023:

Crystal Palace Football Club – Three tickets with hospitality for Crystal Palace v Arsenal, valued at £2,142

Swansea City AFC – Five tickets with hospitality for Swansea City v Bournemouth, valued at £800

Cain International UK Services Ltd – Two tickets with hospitality to the Chelsea vs Arsenal football match, valued at £2,400

Teescraft Engineering Ltd – Four tickets with hospitality for Newcastle United v Arsenal, valued at £1,000

West Ham United Football Club – Two tickets for pre-match hospitality in the Chairperson Lounge and to the match, valued at £2,000 (estimated)

Norwich City Football Club – Four match tickets and hospitality, valued at £820

Premier League – Five tickets with hospitality to Arsenal vs Porto, value £3,000

Manchester City Football Club – Hospitality and match tickets for two people to Man City vs Arsenal, valued at £900. 

Brighton and Hove Albion Football Club, four tickets and hospitality to Brighton vs Arsenal, valued at £500.

Wolverhampton Wanderers Football Club – Four tickets and hospitality to Arsenal vs Wolverhampton Wanderers value £1,488 (approximate)

Tottenham Hotspur Ltd – Five tickets and hospitality to Tottenham Hotspur vs Arsenal, value £2,500 (approx).

Manchester United: Two tickets in the Directors Box, with dining at Old Trafford. v Arsenal. Valued at £1800.

The only freebie rejected was a bottle of Vinegar offered by blogger Inchy. It was found to contain arsenic. Value 39p

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TO BE OR NOT TO BE…
To be or not to be beheaded…
Be hung, poisoned or electrocuted,
Shot, walk the plank or be guillotined,
For you have killed, murdered…
The UK death penalty was abolished,
Life sentence, murderers are pleased,
After 3 years, many have been released,
Now, HMP workers are beleaguered,
Freeing killers just to save money,
I know it will lead to anarchy,
Murderers are just let free early,
To kill again, by HMG; approvingly!
They’ve tried things, therapeutically,
Chop off rapist choppers antiseptically,
Else, there’ll be disorder, catastrophe,
Pandemonium, bedlam, antipathy,
Course, this is only advisory…
Could we start with someone miserly?
By winter’s end, he’ll have killed so many,
I refer, to Pensioner-Killer Herr Starmer,
Who I hear wears a willie-warmer…
Keir will have murdered many a pensioner,
By the end of this freezing winter,
Drove to suicide many a farmer,
His defence? He’s caught habromania?
The man’s a shyster, & a proven liar,
I’m sorry if I sound like an inveigher,
We must get rid of this political vulture,
If we don’t stop him, he’ll kill more for sure,
I advise him to wear his Kevlar!
I’m a bit of transcendental augurer,
But indications of the future for Starmer,
It is vague & as confusing as Keir’s hylomania, 
It’s hard to read such a hornswoggler…
I’ve been depressed so heretofore,
Suddenly, I want to live longer…
Long enough to see him go to the hereafter!
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I returned to an imitation, pseudo-pretend life at 04:00hrs, with the regular springing awake and waiting for Diabetic Doreen to sort out my cerebrum and get that to work in a guise or manner that would allow me to realise that it was really 04:00hrs and work out what day it was. Then, I tackled the nocturnal catheter pouch disconnecting. Which was a more straightforward job this morning. Since I’d drifted off to sleep in the second-hand, c1968, eyesorely-horrendously grungy beige-coloured, £300, charity shop bought, crumb-retaining, microorganism-microbe producing, gungy, moth-eaten, non-working, bacillus encouraging, incommodious, Haemorrhoid Harold testing, c1968 recliner last night, and didn’t make it to the bed. Carer Chris, who did the last call last night. Christ got the large quilt from the bed and over me. He knew I would never get to the bed, he said, this morning. Apparently, I was in a seizure when he arrived. I was muttering, struggling to get words out, and not really with it. The lad’s reading me now that he knows about my ailments and how they sometimes affect me.

I grabbed and limped into the kitchen, with a sudden feeling from my EQ that I may have left the taps running, the fridge or freezer door open, or the oven on last night in my overtired slumber. EQ is rarely wrong. Sadly, he wasn’t this morning, either. Getting into that kitchen gave me more than one surprise this morning. First, the windows had iced up, the temperature was -5°c, and the freezer door had, as I feared, been left open! 
I had to throw away some of the partially defrosted food. On the bright side, less food went into the bin than when I left the freezer door ajar last time. (Two days ago) Tsk!
For the outside of the window glass, I got some paper towelling and wiped it to see through it. And there, even for my eyes to see, high in the sky, was the Moon and two planets in view, Jupiter and Venus, if I remember correctly. Despite the freezing ice on my hands and in the air, I decided to get the Kodak to try and get a decent shot of the Moon and planets. These are the best of them to make it to the SD card. Four did not? I still can’t determine what I’m doing wrong to make so many photographs disappear.  
I looked into the internal photos on the camera, but they were not there.
I could see the planets in every shot I took; I had my reading glasses on to see the screen on the Kodak camera.
However, some, like the SD card, did not reach the end product again. Yet some did, turning up on the SD card. Was it instilled and installed by the mysteries of Woodthorpe Court, with the hobgoblins, spectres, gnomai, phantasms, ghosts, the grotesque succubae, extraterrestrials, ectoplasms, spirits, or the Fata Morganas that have been sent to taunt, irritate and terminate my already limited saneness of mind, which I’m already battling with Diabetic Doreen Dementia and Cogniscent Impairment Iris, to keep my marbles? Unglesitknangles!

I meandered to the wet room, returned to make sure I’d shut the freezer door after cleaning up, returned to the wet room, and deposited myself on the WC. Where I stayed for a while. Because an “It’ll come anytime now” type of sensation lingered for ages. All I managed to clear was several incontrollable blasts of wind. So, I gave up, despite that nagging doubt that it just may spurt of its own accord remained with me. I had a wash & shave, medicated various body parts in need, got fresh PPs on, and made up the waste bags. (The photo didn’t show on the SD card – Humph!)

Whatever happened to the day? Where did it go? I recall Carer Joanne coming, and we were having a laugh.
I know I had just a few of
earlier, I thought I was in one when Joanne was here. But she said nothing. When we were both laughing at my struggle to get words out and forgetting what I was talking about, as we joked and laughed, I’m sure of it. Well…
Later, while taking a break from the arduosity of getting the blog done, I checked the camera and a photo I knew nothing about until I viewed it, and it came back to me. Anyway, here it is.
The frost and ice are still there, and at 1°c, I’m not surprised.
The balcony door cracked as the ice fell off. Not looking too good.

I made a JS order for next week. Tried to keep it low, but as usual, I had to go over the £40 limit in case they had something out of stock. That puts me in line for a delivery charge.

Back on the blog, I realised that they were coming thick and fast. Some seemed to last only a few seconds, and I felt giddiness a few times between each one. But I coped with them in the morning without any real bother, which I find positive. When they first started hitting me, they fritted and unsettled me. Now, this change is getting me a smidge worried. I’ll phone 111 in the morning, no, on Monday, and ask for advice.

On a more positive note, tonight, my urine is a much better, lighter colour. It still stinks, though. I must get on with the blog. I’m taking too long on the odes or making them too long. Even two days ago, I worked on one until three in the morning. I can’t help it. I love doing them. Sad, because they’re not good.

The sun did come out today, as it was about to disappear over the horizon. The frost is now mostly melted, but not in the areas the sun did not reach.
I thought at first that they looked like snow clouds. When Carer Chris came, I heated a steak pastie, told him it would soon snow, and showed him this picture of the clouds. He looked at his computer on his phone, and the weather forecast didn’t mention snow. So much for my humble and wrong predictions. Hahaha! 

I continued with this blog. Amazingly,
gave me rest after Chris had been and medicated me, had his nibble and a can of pop. It took him about ten seconds to see off the steak pastie. It was unexpected to him, and he enjoyed it so much. Which cheered me up, too. 

I was not doing very well in the concentration stakes, then, aha, another summoning from the innards arrived; 
Get yourself to the wet room post haste! So I did just that. But it was all in vain again! I must have spent another half-hour on the Throne. Grunting as I tried my bestest to urge and encourage something to move… But no! For the second time today, Zilch moved. I’m hoping that by taking a prescription powder immediately, I shall have a third visit, which might be a success. Otherwise, especially after eating my meal later on, my innards may just blow up or explode!

I’m getting beyond the capability of concentration now. I shall maketh a meal. Blimey, the higher clouds have changed so much now. Still beautiful.

Meatless pork sausages, chestnuts, and tomatoes. Six slices of Milk Roll bread, one for each sausage, and a dip of BBQ Tomato ketchup. Two desserts: Lemon and custard and jelly.

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
BONUS STARMER BASHING ODE!
Don’t let Starmer get you depressed,
Despite pensioners he attacked,
In free-clothes, he gets dressed,
And the lies that he’s amassed,
Starmer, being a backhander & biased…
The farmers he has tax-bushwhacked,
As PM, he should be uninstalled,
The man is totally unscrupled,
The Torie are beyond being annealed,
Leaving Starmer with an open field…
To do as he likes, unimpeded,
At no.10, he’s firmly bivouacked,
His lies & gift-taking have been obsignated,
Surely he must now be prescited?
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
Farewell, & Look after Yourself.
If farmer or pensioner cause…
STARMER WON’T!

Inchy: Friday 10th January 2025

/ Inchie / 8 Comments

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When I snuff it, will I get theosophy?
Or be greeted by nothingness, dimly?
I don’t ask these questions grimly,
Will St Peter be there to greet me?
Will I be sent to Heaven of Hell…
Is there a difference? Who can tell?
Will Hell be running a brothel…Does 
Does Heaven have a mosque or Chapel?
What will they do to a dead infidel,
Will I see Hitler or Oliver Cromwell,
Will I still have a catheter bag or navel?
Are Heaven & Hell both topological?
Sometimes, I hope they will be real?
Will they both be parallel or mutual?
Will they serve tea, coffee or oenomel?
Will we see Angels, anything celestial?
Will we see relatives or a pet poodle?
Grizelda, will we be able to canoodle?
Get reborn to see another crepuscle?
Will the St. Peters interview be conflictual?
Have to go through a validity ritual?
Have the same problems cardiological?
Will Dementia still be in situ, cerebral?
Arthur Itis, FND, PN be there? It’s credible,
Will we at least resemble being corporeal?
Will we be negative, nervous, or joyful?
Whether Hell or Heaven, dying is awful,
Being sent back to earth is too stressful!
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Went to Kip late. Got up late again at 06:00hrs
Nocturnal pouch removed.

I amalgamated three of the waste bags into one.

First-morning view from the kitchen.
Not too good.
I tried to get a decent shot of Devonshire Ave.
I didn’t manage it. Tsk! Temp -3ºc.

Food Delivery.
Sods, bread rolls, sausages & fresh peas.
I had to empty the box of battered fish balls into the freezer to get them to fit in it!

The fridge is not as full this time, but still too full! I got some of the beef in gravy in a pouch again. Yeehaa!

A fine mix of fodder. Beef in stout gravy, sausages, pasties, tomatoes, frank’s, jacket and roasting potatoes, & jellies.

Carer Chris arrived. He did his thing and was about to put on the diabetic socks, but I stopped him and said I was going to do my ablutions and shower first. He told me he would make the next call and get the socks and catheter contraption replaced then. But he did not come! Luckily, Carer Joeanne did; she fitted the catheter and put my socks on for me.

In between   , they were a bit more bothersome again, but they seemed to keep giving me little breaks now and then. How kind.

Over the next hour, I took three shots of the sky.

I was miles behind with the blogging but persevered, as any other young, athletic, fit, good-looking man would. 

Sunsetting.

It’s getting late, dark, it’s getting colder…

Time for some fodder.

Beef in stout gravy, sausages, potatoes.
Two cheesy bread rolls to soak up the gravy.

Washed up, and as I climbed into the £300 second-hand shop-bought, c1966, moth-eaten, bedraggled, grotty, cringingly beige-coloured, much-dilapidated, crumb-containing from my nocturnal nibblings, bug-ridden, itch-inspiring, not-working recliner to watch an episode of my favourite, ‘Heartbeat’, Sweet Morpheus took me. A few minutes of bliss enveloped me…. not only that, but was noticeable by his absence! 
Then Carer Chris arrived to wake me up, gently mind.
Without me moving, he put the nocturnal catheter bag on. Gave me the medication and seemed to drift off, like an angel back to the clouds. I had been drinking shandy after the meal, so I may have been mildly tipsy; I don’t know. More likely that I was under the influence of . It all felt surreal.

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Life is like an avenue,
Lined with hatred, little affettuoso,
Filled with the unexpected blanscue,
Daily selections of bugaboo…
Oligarach rule, the financial hullaballo,
Conning the proletariat & ingenue,
Rulers rulings, decisions are impromptu.
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TTFN, Best to all of you!
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