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Inchies Ode Today was inspired by Timothy Price Photographer extraordinaire and Jolly Good Cyber-Mate

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It’s been an… erm, er… well. an interesting month so far.
I’ve been given a rubber wristlet for DNR (Do Not Resuscitate). A Diabetes rubber wristlet. These will decorate my wrists along with the On Warfarin, Allergic To Clopidogrel, Hard of Hearing, and the new last week, Dementia alert bands. The Cataract – Vision – Impaired one has not arrived yet.
I’ve checked the box of the options on the Doctor’s letter. In answer to the Question: Where Would You Like To Die, at Home or in a Hospital?
Now after the initial rushing me into the hospital when I woke up with blood coming from Little Inchie and the Haemorrhoid-ridden rear end.
I think this was four weeks ago. The Paramedics took to the QMC, A&E.
Where the medicos must have forced two gallons of warm water down my throat to get the wee-wee flowing through Little Inchy, as opposed to Catheter Cathy’s Contraption. I had the catheter put in and taken out about six times, which for me with Phimosis and the Fungal Lesion – not to mention having the smallest willy I’ve ever seen (I’ve seen ten-year-olds with a bigger one than I). This is why the in and the outing of the tube were so painful for me. And it really was testing my pain limit… mind you, it still is at this very moment. I was on the computer and listening to the new tenant’s TV blasting away upstairs. (I assume. He or she might be getting the flat sorted, which accounts for the occasional clunks and thuds. Herbert Mark Two? Haha!
No problem, though; I’ll get used to it. Just take out the hearing aids.
They did bladder scans, and some on a big machine. But gave up and sent me to the City Hospital Urology Department. Patience Ward Two.
Where Patience was at a premium. Urology was just as baffled as the QMC staff were. They had the catheter in and out over the next day, at least eight times; despite gulping down at least two gallons of water, getting to use Little Inchie for wee-weeing was a failure. They (Urology) summoned me back to have a… I’ve forgotten what it was called now.
Ah, I’ve got it now (just looked it up on the Internet). A Cystoscopy, a CT scan of the urinary tract, and a urine culture. Still, no reason was found, so the catheter has now been on for about 4-5 weeks. The walk to the Doctor, half a mile at most, took me nearly two hours! I had to keep stopping cause the pain was so bad. I got the surgery, told the Doctor, and hose said: “Talk to Urology”. It’s great to be so cared for, innit?
Anyway, since the tumble I had getting on the trolly at the hospital, week one: I had another fall. Week two: two Accifauxpas. Week three: Just the one; it wasn’t a bad one. Week four: Three tumbles, and two, one seriously, walking-into-solid-objects. The wet room door, and then the junk room door frame. Which started
and produced a
, that had me over – but I fell on the two bags of laundry that has not been collected. I’m glad they were days late now. Hehehe!
Today, the wee-wee into the bags seemed a little better. I reckon I’ve emptied the
around ten times! And the blood in it was far less than yesterday’s was.
Is there a light at the end of the tunnel? Maybe… perhaps!
The
attaching did not take place. No Carer arrived to attach it for me. I believe they were struggling with staffing problems and possibly the hospitalisationing of another tenant. No bother, I kept waking up overnight anyway, and I remembered to check the small day bag each time. Emptied it three times. No sweat!
.
With all the nocturnal activities of emptying the pouch, I didn’t get up until 07:30hrs. Little sluggard! The was at bursting point, I managed to get it emptied before any disaster!
arrived as I was making a brew. Got the medications sorted, and he helped me ready the bin bags for him to take. Said how busy he was. Thanked him profusely.
I left the hot water tap running again!
The pain from Little Inchie was still bad and stayed that way all day & night.
and cobblers!
then
Came at teatime.
Late morning view.
and later
came.
Hyper-One Again.
Mid-Morning views.
A lot of white cars?
Catheter emptying. Nice and like colour this moring.

Magnificent Sunsetting this evening!
Catheter is ready for emptying.
Is that a twinge of blood in there, I see?
Sunset bying down…
Eerie colours changing…
Still beautiful…
A minute later, the last blast from the dying sun…
Looks like a two-tone of blood in the Catheter…
That’s a better piccy.
But look at the blood in it!!!
Argh!
Started emptying it – rich red blood…
Looks to be thinning at the end…
Almost bubbling now? Can you see a cat’s face in there?
Starting to make the evening Meal and,
arrived.
He was looking fitter tonight but not a happy laddie. But soon cheered up when he got the new night bags to put on the day pouch. These ones had the plastic grip so you could hang them up. Sorted the medications, and we had a little chinwag. Np putting the world to rights, but we did manage a bit of cheer for each other.
When the night bag was on, the blood started to flow in dribs and drabs.
But, oh so slowly.
The long extension tube often stops the flow, and I feel the build-up in my bladder, and have to shake the blood through.
Richard showed me how to use the Air-Fryer, and he put some alphabet potato letters in it and left to get on with his other jobs.
Fifteen minutes later, the fryer gave out a ping that, luckily, I was in the kitchen to hear. What an alarm timer with one ping, and that was my lot!
The potato letters tasted great, all crispy on the outside.
The spuds I did in the slow cooker. The tomatoes were just about acceptable tastewise (Italian, not good this time of year). And the ersatz mini-franks were surprisingly excellent! Soya based methinks
Got this blog finished and posted off. ![]()
TTFNski, EACH!
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Bit of blood in the overnight Catheter pouch.
Caught a seagull launching off of a lamplight.
Down in the elevator, along the link passage through.
Started what turned out to be a bad idea.
Every step was agony. Due to the darned
I eventually got over the crest of the hill. I had
Within 10 seconds of my arrival at the surgery, Doctor Vindla came to fetch me into the consulting room. 
.
Up to the bus stop. Caught the bus.
Went into Winchester Court and through the link passage into Winwood Court. Not many folks around?
To let them know I was back in situ.
The tiny pouch
But forgot to go in to check if any painkillers may have been sent electronically from the Doctor to the chemist. But I expect it had not been sent, anyway. I wonder if the Doctors get a bonus for everyone they get to join the DO NOT RESUSCITATE brigade? Hehehe!
Mayhap if they can save on not resuscitating…
Very nice.


Must have been a reason, I suppose?
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06:30hrs: After a much better night, only jumping a maximum of five times, I stirred and took a wee-wee.


I tucked into the belated meal.
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05:20Hrs: I woke up with the guilt of poor Carer Richard going with me today to the Hospital. It makes sense, I know; he is the only person on this planet that can answer the questions the nurse will ask.

I did nearly forget the reading glasses but remembered as we were at the point of leaving. I went to get to them.
When Richard had departed, I had a feeling of aloneness, not loneliness. If you know what I mean?

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18:00hrs: I put some potatoes in the oven. (After a lot of de-eying and removing green maggots).
I checked the potatoes in the oven. During a break in ‘Heartbeat’ on the box.
The Meridian 31:45hrs Care did not arrive.
I got the meal served up.
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I’ve never suffered as much with put pain getting the daily ablutions done before. The ankle ulcer was stinging away. The tight leg had rebloated, and I had a total of eight mini
Despite my trying hard to be careful throughout, I sadly caught my precious but, Oh, too swollen and tender
I’m not sure of events for a while.
Waking up confused, but realised I had not got the 



This ended any of my enjoyment of or seeing the funny side of the occasion.
On the memory pad on the side of the computer, it said, “Took photos” 




I finally got on with creating this blog – sounds so easy, doesn’t it? But, no!
Oh, blimey, I’ve just remembered the mushrooms that I put in the slow cooker – around 15 hours ago!
Sunday AM, late, very late, updated this blog.
Made the most belated meal; BBQ rice (microwaveable), with 7-Mediterranian roasted vegetable sauce heated in the saucepan. A lemon yoghourt. and got settled. No mushrooms, of course!