– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
A mishmash of mordant mental malignancy was gone through today. Confusion over metastatic prostate cancer; Why am I still taking the Finasteride.
It was originally told me by the specialist at the Haywood Hospital, that they were for a month’s course. Then the
would be removed for 24 hours, to allow me to try manually peeing. Then a bladder scan would be done to see what’s left in it, not passed. If all is well, the Catheter can be removed. If not, the only course left open is for you to have a permanent one fitted.
This has been done three times now. Every time the bladder was found to be 30% full after weeing.
I’d hoped to be told that I’d be going on the waiting list for the operation on the bladder. There would still be a bad to be controlled of course – but the key factor in this cheering me up was that a tube would go into the bladder via the side of the stomach. Hence: My poor battered 
and getting cut up and causing so much pain, would hopefully be a memory! But, No! They just replaced the contraption again, and the whole procedure was repeated twice more. Same results not enough passed!
ensured a free run from 
ensued today. Deepak-Depression, self-criticising, Fed-Upperedness and I have to admit it… to a certain level of self-pity. Which dissipated I
. It seems to make me aware that I am far better off than many people in the world, country, Nottingham, even Sherwood and in these flats where I dwell, with my topsy-turvey, ever-changing moods.
At the moment, typing this, albeit already Sunday afternoon and I’m miles behind with everything; I’m verging on feeling almost, practically contented!
Of course, it won’t last long, but there you go. Had I not been feeling up, the downers would never have arrived… I think I got that wrong somehow?
I’d better get a move on. My photo comments will be a little shorter than usual (Well, we’ll see how it goes). To save me time. A lot to get done today. A lot to forget, lose and do wrong as well.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
.
A photo missed off of yesterday’s blog.
07:10hrs: Up late again, needing to appease the demands of the bowels. Much firmer products were evacuated!
Waste dogs sorted out.
Making the first of the two mugs of tea allowed me…
However…
So the tea had gone cold! Tsk!
Fodder arrived…
Unpacked the bags…
Plenty of bread!
Fresh foods.
Disappointed with the bananas! See the black strips underneath the stalks? A sure sign of age and mistreatment. All bar one were bruised, uneatable!
Daily medicationalisationings.
The new dressing gown was delivered, just before 
arrived.
Just after I’d taken a photo of the gown. It didn’t come out the colour that it actually was. took the camera and tried to get a better shot for me.
He held them up while I tried again.
Better, but not right yet…
Not a lad to be beaten, he took it out on the balcony and got this ace shot taken. That’s the colour!
Spent ages on the blog, and nearly forgot about the 
emptying. Hehe!
But the flow steadied, and three hours and 2 litres of spring water later, the pouch was nearly empty?
Had to sort through the Asda-Walmart frozen diced potatoes before getting them in the oven.
Took this photo of the getting dark earlier sky as I made the vegetable soup.
Chunky vegetable soup, with plenty of diced, boiled then roasted potatoes. A better job this time. Taste: 8/10.
After dining well, I got the pots all finished washing up.
And I took this snap of the evening view.
Then I dived (not literally of course) into the c1966, ÂŁ300 Oxfam charity shop bought, second-hand, wincingly grotty, beige coloured, crumb-covered from my nocturnal nibbling, itch-making, uncomfortable, positively unhealthy & dangerous, no longer operational, virus-breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, Catheter-tube-trapping, recliner. Hope I can get that bed soon from the hospital. I’ll have to beg someone to ring them for me… and hope and pray they can get through this time.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
I dreamt you Won the Lottery…
May the unknown emotions, within, waiting…
To burst forth, with the verifying…
Your coming Lottery win is innervating,
So much, you’ll want it reaffirming!
What’ll you spend it on? I’m just guessing…
A new bathroom for your ablutioning?
Pay for your noisy neighbours assassinating?
Pay off your Auntie to stop her blackmailing?
No need for any more of your burgling!
A holiday in Australia, backpacking?
Go to a health spa, for detoxificating?
Your power bills will be less concerning!
No more fears, or talk about bankrupting!
Or your mental health deteriorating!
Go live somewhere with security gating?
Private Doctors may charge ÂŁ10 per Aspirin,
Go on, live an idle life that’s high-faulutin’!
Oh, yes, that’s what you have been doing!
Rishi & wife Murty, have been capitalising.
Destroying HMG, the Tories are dying…
But, no need for your sighing...
Positions of power you can be buying?
Purchase a fifteenth home in Pekin?
TTFN
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
TIP: Seasonal
.
(A caring gal), was eventually recognised as the fizzled brain tried to get into gear. It was hard work, confusing and annoying to me cause I knew I was waffling about the leg straps and diabetic socks but could not get a hold of things. 
Storm Babet was settled in for the majority of the day. A run of nine hours of rain. As a record of this, I took photos of the end car park mudslide throughout the day as it gradually grew gruesomely!
Tried to take a close-up through the window.
Then, opposite the flats.
It’s flowing down now.
Tried a closer shot with the window open.
Then, an even closer one.
Muddier water now…
Still growing slowly.
Another close-up.
The top white car had escaped.
It’s at its peak here!
Ablutionings.
Mug of Glengettie.
Poor gal got soaked in the rain, and her feet and socks soaked through. Luckily, I have several pairs of new, unworn socks from back in the day when they fitted, and I could use 
. And we went in to pick a pair so she could have dry tootsies on for the rest of her rounds. Lovely gal. 
It was never easy to manipulate by getting worse legs into the darned thing. Every time, I ended up with bruises, bleeding or blood nips. Many Tumbles as well. But nowadays, she lurks in the spare room, and I feel a hatred (well, fear) for her each time I go into the room. I swear the green-coloured, plastic-covered metal implement of torture still laughs as I go by! 
As indeed, the other five visits of the day were!
The plastic pouring cones arrived. I refilled a dropper bottle with Olive Oil. And to think they came from Taiwan within three days of ordering! 
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
Decent colour in the nocturnal pouch!
Lighter this morning… No, it’s not, I got up late!
My right leg looked a little battered?
Waste bags sorted.
Got the new drinkie in the cupboard for the nurses and carers to pick from. Keeping a list of those given out this year. I missed someone out last year. Tsk!
Well, that was unexpected.
Lunchtime treat.
A repeat evacuation for the first time in months.
The being-done-up for six months home has a ladder moved. Mayhap the builders have returned?
Gotten Himmel, changed again.
I got the colly wobbles?
I tried a close-up shot.
Ahem!
Midnight bag sorting again.
03:00hrs: Good Heavens – Again!
Well-Done…
Who also own or have shares in many other Internet providers throughout the world:
A fine-looking feast was prepared.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
strapping over the compression sock, and on 
the masses of compression bandages on top of the woolly wrapping, I’m beginning to smell I think?
Straps and diabetic socks on the left…
both legs…
& 
in both…
.
Views from the balcony.
The Tree Copse, can no longer visit, sadly.
The mud-slide dwindling.
Straight ahead. Gloom!
But in the afternoon…
The cloudless sky did look wonderful.
Sorting out the dodgy Asda potatoes.
Then I cheered exponentially 
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
… well, 
failing that caused the heavily bandaged leg to clunk onto the floor. 
, followed by a few quietly emitted oaths and curses, as I hit my 
against the leg stanchion on the chair. 
Germolene from the ottoman, rubbed some in the left knee, and rubbed it in well for a while. The knee was a little larger than when I got my head down last night after 
doing the same thing, rubbing in the ointment. Took off the 
, and grabbed 
, to take this photo of the colouring. Which was not too bad at all.
I gently raised my elephantine body up on its dodgy knees, leg ulcers, 
the wooden walking stick, and hobbled into the kitchen to get the kettle on. Where I took these three-morning view photographs – Gawd! They came out worse than yesterday’s were? What’s the opposite of smug-mode-engaged? I’ve just looked up an antonym… and made a tab to use; 
!
Yet another photo that I either can’t remember taking or, took without realising that I’d taken it.
Eventually, I got the first of the two permitted brews of tea made. Thompson’s Punjana this time.
Sorted out the waste bags, and got them into one large one.
Took it to the front door to be collected by the Carer at a later time.
Then got the daily doses, dosed, and the ointments, cream applications, and medications tackled. Ear drops, eye drops, and eye-cleaning sorted.
Washed the Jenny-Donated mugs ready for the second brew, possibly Glengettie in the afternoon/evening.
Off to the wet room for the first 
 duties.
man told her the bag was to be changed every month. This left me feeling confused. I felt sure that Kara checked every week to check and see if the day-pouch had been changed? convinced me that I’d got it wrong again. I apologised to 
for getting things mixed up. A lovely gal. I think I’m losing it worse than usual? I’d have put money on it that I was right, and it should be weekly, and the dried blood from 
backed me up. 
Galore on the blogging, so I gave it up and did some sorting in the spare room. No lifting or bending, though, as per the instructions and recommendations from Sarah of the Falls & Rehabilitations Team. More bags to go. Back to the mistake ridden-ever correcting the blogging.
. Another nice gal. We managed a little natter, leg-pulling and laugh. During which I explained my earlier 
was changed every week… And she said I was right! Â 
case. Then, a month trial on Finasteride tablets to try and reduce the size of the prostate as a last gasp-chance, and if this does not work, a permanent catheter will have to be fitted. The month trial turned into a 6-month trial; no passing, but still on the Finasteride even now! No signs of any permanent catheter being fitted either. This seemed a logical conclusion to me, and Joanne. We both wondered if they were waiting for me to snuff it. Save them the expensive operation? Won’t keep them long. Hahaha!
I selected the lesser bruised potatoes and put them in the oven tray for baking later. It turned out to be ten hours later as it happened. Tsk!
A snack, a treat, was the next thing I made. Two mini butter croissants, with some naughty lemon curd in a side dish for dipping them into, and the final mug of Glengettie for the day.
As I took this snap of the beautiful sky…
I thought of Mother Nature, and far beyond the sky…
What a fantastic, beautiful display of clouds in the sky this afternoon.
The blogging was not very productive now. Feeling tired and weary. Thus, even more cock-ups and mistakes were being made as I pressed on regardless. I cheated on my two mugs of tea a day… and made a third one. Naughty? Yes! In mitigation, it was not intentional then, as 
Nightie-Night Sunshine!
Made a start emptying the potato husks into the mixing bowl, with some delightful Leicester Cheese to taste. 
droppages or spillages. Flesh back in the halved husks, with sea salt and not butter, butter. Forked the tops to aid with crisping while cooking. And into the oven on 220° 
heat, and back to close the computer down. Then, I got the dirty pots I’d made washed with my not-so-secret method: I’d put the dishes in the bowl, 
washing up liquid added, and as the hot water filled the bowl, most of the bits of burnt cheese floated up and out of the bowl into the sink! A tip here: if you try this, make sure you run plenty of cold water around any metal bits in the sink cause it stains it rotten! 
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – Thanks to each one! – – –
Found a clue… of which I before knew,
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
What a slog of a day. 
04:45hrs: Great colour this morning. I felt tired out still, and had to encourage myself to escape the c1966, ÂŁ300 Oxfam charity shop bought, second-hand, itchy, wincingly grotty, beige coloured, crumb-covered from my nocturnal nibblings, itch-making, uncomfortable, positively unhealthy & dangerous, no longer operational, virus-breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of catheter-tube-trapping, recliner. Caught my balance, and began to revert to my usual morning state of confusion and more confusion.
Ablutions and the first of the four visits to the Throne.
I spent several minutes counting the cracks on the ceiling, and then I got the crossword book and spent ages on them. Not that I got many answers in, but enjoyed it all the same. 
The legs are getting fatter at the top, and the left is thinner at the bottom. 
is getting uncomfortable and causing lesions on the skin? With 
Waste bags were collated. And left in the hallway close to the front door for collection by the kind carer. At this stage, I had a little bother when suddenly 
I took this with the window open from inside the balcony, at the right end, facing North, towards Daybrook, Arnold and eventually Mansfield. The rain was coming, and the mudslide growing.
Then some 
This may have been a mistakenly taken picture?
The last view of my leg’s condition was before the District Nurse arrived minutes later. bless her cotton socks, to sort me out with new paraphernalia straps & bandages!. 
A new black wind-on compression sock.
she’d take a photo of it, for me to use on the blog.
reduced the fluid.
This will need changing every so often and washing.
Carers will not be able to 
played dead for a few seconds… this time she got me – Crunched down on the hard floor, but the 
Utilising 
Got some nosh done. Potato Cakes, the last of the sweet Jenny-donated tomatoes, and some pickled beetroots
Hobbled into the kitchen to get the washing up done.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
Another Inchy Failure – He got 3 in 60 seconds!
Not so Good This Week
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
A bit clearer this morning in the nocturnal pouch
Why? What? I know not!
Day pouch filled up with darker urine?
The compression bandaging was looking good.
Into the kitchen to check the taps.
You’d not believe how long and the mess it took me to get the pad on the mop. The ‘Speed-Mop’ – Huh!
It didn’t move a lot of the dirt and stains…
Just about worth the effort & pain it cost me.
Finally got a brew of tea made. I made it carefully, cause this is the last of the three china mugs I bought. Last week, I mourned the passing (and shattering) of the second mug this year. I do think that tea tastes better, imbibed from these mugs. Well, mug, now!.
She kindly took the bags through to the kitchen for me.
I thanked her, and was suddenly slightly stupefied as she departed; When I realised (or thought) that the order was ordered for 8 days later? I shan’t go any further into that, as this sickenly often-repeated Whoopsie with the food, was getting me into a self-loathing mode.
Household items.
Treats, luxury fodder!
A mixture.
A crammed-to-the-hilt fridge & freezer.
The rain had been coming for ten minutes or so when I went, as I often do, due to the memory-distorting qualities of 
The rain was pouring down heavily as I took this photo from the kitchen window to the North.
Then one straight ahead… all taken through the window
A final one towards the City Centre.
I’ve tried to explain these blanks to the lady at what was then, a Dementia counselling meet. But it was taken casually and she moved on to other areas, as if she did not believe me, or didn’t want to discuss the subject.
Another carer called as I was eating the meal. But memory is patchy of even that. By the time I was washing the pots up, things seemed to clear?
and 
…
Took this shot of the evening in Night-Scene mode using 
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
Scarily deep colours in the night pouch?
I went to the wet room and adopted my Sherlock Holmesian mode to discover the problem was down there… I soon found the blood flowing close to the tube’s entry point.
The PPs were removed, and new Depends were readied to use. I then tried to stop the flow of blood. The Fungal lesion on the little chap appeared to have increased to four now! Argh! No doubt due to the presence of the deadly catheter that has been inserted for over a year now! I did take a photograph of the 
area… well, the blood on the pants, but decided not to show it, as it looked pretty gruesome. But at least I can show it to the nurses who are due today. But not on the web. Cleaned myself 
lower regions of little 
Off to the kitchen to make a brew of tea. I was having more trouble this morning from my 
leg.
I took a fetching photo of the car park below the kitchen window. Eerie or not? What do you think?
Oh, heck, back to the 
disappointment, or of that nature? He’s never been wrong in his tips, yet. I’m afraid. The evacuation was another Trotsky in-charge affair, but the content came out differently this time. It’s a sort of sludgy with flaky bits around the edges; I’ve had this type once before, a few months ago. I think!
I went off to the kitchenette again, only to find I’d left the damned kitchen hot water tap (faucet) running yet again! I keep blaming all these faux pas
… there is something within that is crushing, obliterating my plans, thoughts and abilities to pieces lately. In particular, she loves toying with my short-term memory. I’ve thought about it a lot recently. It erks me!
Later today, I realised that the most cock-ups come when I’m trying to concentrate on something, and a simple thing like a phone call coming in a Carer or Nurse coming in will leave me open to forgetfulness. Even with talking, if someone changes the topic, alters a question… I’m lost! Not only to the new subject but what I was doing before the chinwag started. I’m amazed that I can still do the odes? But everything is error-ridden and takes far too long to get written as I originally meant it to… 
The blood papules on the left leg had increased a bit. I’ll mention it to the nurse when she arrives later on. He says with an air of fallacious, 
blind confidence
they are old? But not to fret. Too much!
Aha, the Iceland order has arrived. So, I left the computer so I could forget where I was up to and what my next move would be. I admitted the driver via the intercom box and opened the door for his arrival. 
drinkies and nibbles shelves.
the first bag emptied out.
puffs are for Jenny’s other half, Frank. Nice chap, and lovely Lady, they are. 
against the server-trolley wheel. Naturally, me being a brave, almost heroic, man of courage, grit and gamely pain-tolerant, there was no groaning, moaning or Arghs! 
The intercom lit up, and I went to investigate. It was two of the District Nurses, who were soon up and in the flat, 
checking the legs first. They took photographs of the 
new blood leaks to show the Doctor when they returned to base at the Community Centre. Then, one of the Angels got her computer out and started asking many questions about my medical history, who and where each one was diagnosed when the various ailments first, what treatment I had, and when started. Well, that did not go too well! Instead, I feared she’d ask me for my date of birth because, cause for the love of me, I 
couldn’t recall it… It came back to me later; she didn’t ask for it. 
was a shock to me when it hurt so much, especially in my right leg, which seems semi-immune to pain at times when the 
. 
!
As they departed, I insisted they take their choice of drinkies and or nibbles, and I thanked them. One said they would be back on Friday to check out the state of 
My precious nurse Hristina phoned to let me know she would call in the morning, between 9> and 10:00hrs, to take blood for the anticoagulation DVT department ♥
Unbe-rotten-believable!
, is the one that can give me problems, but the left one (she’ll need naming now); Gave way, and down I went in the kitchen onto my left knee – which, as you know, is the one currently having 
attached to it! The pain from the fall was of little bother; I was more concerned that the bag may have burst. I checked and thought; well, that was a bit of luck! I thought it an opportune time to make the second brew of Glengettie tea of the day in celebration… 
Just caught the end of the sun setting.
Zoomed in a little…
Moments later, she’s gone!
Nightie, night!
Then, I industriously set about preparing the simple evening meal. Just potatoes baked, emptied out, causing a few burns on the fingers. Then, even more, I scooped out the flesh and mashed it with No-Butter, butter, Leicester cheese and sea salt in the mixing bowl. Ran a fork over the top of each skin to create ridges so as to crisp up the finished product, 
and back into the oven, 
After the lad had left, I checked on the cheesy spud’s progress, cooking-wise. They needed a little longer. So, I put the TV on to see if anything worthwhile was showing. 
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – SMUG MODE– – – – – – – – – – – –
Inchy’s Carers Health Checks Returns
The four-hour leg-ups and then-down again routine, is a little tiring and disconnected, thanks to 
Who is back to her customary, well-practised habit of installing unwanted, 
, frequently activating deep-routed moments of 
Morning kitchen window view.
Within the first half-hour!
Bags were taken through to the kitchen.
The first bag was emptied, and food was put away.
Freezer full!
Fridge loaded.
None foods & treats.
Refilled the Carer, Nurses, & delivery treats.
All the bending has set off 
.
I selected two large potatoes, to be turned
Got it back on, and made a start on this blog for a couple of hours’ worth of mistakes & errors to be made.
Had a wash of sorts, no shave!
I was pleased with how the potatoes came out!
A no-fish fish stick, a bit of the tomato cob,
Neighbour Jenny called, brought some tomatoes up got me ♥
I made a late snack; bless her.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
BACK TO NEAR NORMAL
The pestering-browbeating, doubts, fretting, frustrations, apprehensive, distracted, distraught, nervous, on edge, stressed, self-despising, muddled brain, constant forebodings and depression have all returned! Sadly! Tsk!
Managed a new record, I think…
Ah, a betterer colour this morning!
Another not-so-good photo of the morning view.
So often.
arrived for the PM call. She did a kitchen and bathroom check on the taps & stove and took the waste bag to the chute for me.
One to the left…
‘Tother to the right!
No seepage from 
who called to wake me.
Took this shot while waiting for the cooking of the meal
caused the hand to wobble, so I had more salt than planned. Hehe! 
last night, it annoyed me when he kicked off non-stop all night.