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INCHY’s ODE
Called on by an acquisitor, investigator or burglar,
We deal with far too many an abrogator…
A Prime Minister who gives us apepsia,
Virgo Keir, who astrologers say is a charmer?
Who’s open to a bribe and/or backhander,
I’m sick of him saying his dad was a toolmaker.
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Always something needed to clarify, certify…
Actions to decertify, destinkify, degunkify…,
Secrets, errors to reveal, declassify, demystify…
Questions, who, when, which & what’s the fee?
Higher, lower, how, who, too few, too many…
Will the earth die, with no petrol or electricity?
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Keir hates farmers, & those on a pension,
Bad times for those with a medical affliction,
And for proletariats with ambition…
Why Keir’s not a Tory is beyond my comprehension,
As is his lack of socialism and compassion.
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Some people can’t walk, hear or see…
People get addicted to drugs & go alcohol-free,
Some act naturally with hatred… aggressively,
Vandalism & bullying is annoyingly scary,
There’s a lack of control & abstinency,
Folk act violently to antiquity & authority…
We’ve known this was coming for years… sadly,
The world’s end, I mean; then we’ll all be free!
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04:30hrs: I stirred but without the usual jumping and jerking. This was replaced this morning by 
.
Well, it made a nice change for me.
I got the 
removed and felt the need to check the kitchen. I had doubts about the verity of my last night’s checks on the state of the taps, stove, food fridge, and freezer doors. Apart from the kitchen looking a mess, I need not have bothered. There were no running taps, stoves left running, or taps (faucets) left on. I used the old camera (not that I had any choice left now) to take photos to see how they 
would come out. Oh dear!
I took a wash and utilised the Porcelain Throne. At least the passing of the evacuation was far easier than when 
was in charge. But it was super messy and needed a lot of cleaning up. Which I did! Then I olive oiled 
the earholes and cleaned and creamed the 
affected left eye and lids. Put the lip salve on the mouth. Ointmentated the knees to help hopefully keep down the pains from 
, 
and of course, 
. I’m glad to 
say it has eased off already. Then, I did the nasty bit, getting the cream onto 
. Arghhh! I just laughed it off, of course. Ahem!
I took some shots with the old camera, hoping to improve on yesterday’s earlier ones. As I opened CoelDraw and prepared to import, she 
gave me a dose of her moving pains in sequence. It felt as if it was running amok. I was close to pressing my wristlet alarm, and as I was getting ready to, things calmed down tremendously. It didn’t stop or anything ridiculous, but it was entirely bearable. I was collating the pictures and saw the one that I did last night. Here it is;
I noticed the marks on the right-hand side. Then, I realised with the aid of the spyglass that it was all the way across. I hoped that today’s photos were not going to have it on them. All of this morning’s efforts were below standard for many reasons.
Odd hue?
Blurry.
The hallway that was taken with the flash on?
Disappointing, to say the least.
I had to try again after I’d got dressed.
Well, the night shot wasn’t too bad.
I finally made a start to yesterday’s blog update. There’s not much to do, so I posted it off, too!
arrived in good spirits. Medications were given, but she forgot about putting my diabetic socks on for me, I asked her to as well. But I was in a bit of a seizure at times, so my fault. I’ll ask her when she does the financial help visit.
I got around to cleaning the used files and making a start on the graphics for this blog.
Made her second visit. I was deep in a mini-seizure again. I recall bits of the call. She opened the email, only one of interest from the bank. It was filed in the box. The email help went good, I sense. A questionnaire was done, and other things, but I can’t recall what they were now.
Ah, I asked her to ask the Wardens if they had made the loss of Bank Details yet; I was not rushing; I just needed to settle whether it was being done. said she would ask them and let me know. Bless her.
But I heard nothing. I assume that ILC (Independent Living Coordinator), Oberstgrüppenfuhreress Warden and Primo Ballerina, Warden Deana, and ILC (Independent Living Coordinator) Generaloberstess, Ice skating champion florist and Warden Julie were not in the office when she called.
I forgot about the diabetic socks again!
I’ve got this out of order. I think it happened earlier in the day.
The J Sainsbury order arrived.
I tried the camera again.
I took one of the things the driver had put in the boxes for me in the hallway.
Some of the delivered goods were photoed. A pack of Protection Pants, JS’s own label, are on the left of this first photo. This includes air fresheners, shaving foam, razors, and food bags.
Nigerian Garden peas and sliced red onions went in the fridge.
I think I’m missing some photos.
So I looked at the SD card, but 
they are not on it. Does that pee you off? Well, not you, but it does me. Humph! The photos were not very good, were they? If I can get the passwords from the Wardens, I may consider contacting the bank to see if I’ll be allowed to buy a new camera. Then again, maybe not. Waste not want not!
I’ve decided to have the same dinner as last night because I have some Sopocka left to use and one of the rolls to bake. I won’t have tomatoes, though; they are horrible this time of year. I think I’ll have some sauce, though.
OH, 
AGAIN!
The peristency of them got to me.
I put the Community Nurses folder with the telephone number on the stand, so just in case, I’ll remember where I put it. And it’s written in large letters on the front of the folder.
Decentish shots to the left of the kitchenette window were taken here, methinks. I do a lot of that, thinking... I do a lot of gorgetting, as well. Possibly a little more than thinking and remembering.
Then, I took this fairly good photograph to the left of the kitchen window.
This camera! The lousy shots, then decent ones. I must ask Tim Price what a ‘P’ on the camera selector button stands for.
Cut off the attacks instantly. She’s not been back since the same time that replaced her as the primary ailment of the moment. I’m fed up with this change all the time. Still, it makes for variety, I suppose. The cracked lips are improving, and not a single 
volt has shot up my right leg for three hours! Great!
Well, I’m sick of listening to my own moaning!
Cracking on with this blog, and I heard a noise through the Baby Monitor – but could not understand what was being said.
I got 
the wooden walking stick and went to the door. Opened it, but nobody was lurking. Luckily, as I turned around, I 
hit my shoulder on the door frame, which gave me some grief. Had she not, I would never have found the packet that someone had put on the top of the heater. It was the top-up prescription that Carer Richard had ordered for me on Monday. The chemist had popped it through the door without ringing the bell. Again!Hehe! 
I walked to the kitchen to put them in the medical drawer; a beautiful night view was available. Carer took a couple of shots, hoping to catch whatever it was high in the sky. Was it the moon? It was so tiny. It might have been Jupiter or Venus? But if it was either, where was the moon?
You can only just see it in the sky in these pictures.
I also wondered what the red thing was in the top photo?
These came out reasonably well.
I took them all with the ‘P’ options selected. The inside photos didn’t come out as well, did they?
The Carer lent me his camera on loan!
I took the following shots and those in the morning with it. Well, he took the first two tonight during his last visit to me. I’ve got it until midday tomorrow. It’s being collected. So, on Thursday’s blog, the only shots will be those taken in the morning.
I told him I was nervous about dropping my Canon, and he said, No problem. You can buy me a new one—smilingly!
With my record with cameras, I am sooo Weary!
Well, it’s late now and time to make myself some nosh. Oh, no! I’ll answer any comments on WP Reader first.
Eventually, I got the nosh made.
I didn’t make it into the bed. I tried to stay up late to watch the football highlights on the BBC. That didn’t work, of course.
I drifted off about five minutes into the footy. Woke up about an hour after the programme had finished.
And went back into slumberland!
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Sayonara
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TO BE OR NOT TO BE…
out what day it was. Then, I tackled the nocturnal catheter pouch disconnecting. Which was a more straightforward job this morning. Since I’d drifted off to sleep in the second-hand, c1968, eyesorely-horrendously grungy beige-coloured, £300, charity shop bought, crumb-retaining, microorganism-microbe producing, gungy, moth-eaten, non-working, bacillus encouraging, incommodious, Haemorrhoid Harold testing, c1968 recliner last night, and didn’t make it to the bed. Carer Chris, who did the last call last night. Christ got the large quilt from the bed and over me. He knew I would never get to the bed, he said, this morning. Apparently, I was in a seizure when he arrived. I was muttering, struggling to get words out, and not really with it. The lad’s reading me now that he knows about my ailments and how they sometimes affect me.
and limped into the kitchen, with a sudden feeling from my EQ that I may have left the taps running, the fridge or freezer door open, or the oven on last night in my overtired slumber. EQ is rarely wrong. Sadly, he wasn’t this morning, either. 
Venus, if I remember correctly. Despite the freezing ice on my hands and in the air, I decided to get the Kodak to try and get a decent shot of the Moon and 
planets. These are the best of them to make it to the SD card. Four did not? I still can’t determine what I’m doing wrong to 
make so many photographs disappear. 
However, some, like the SD card, did not reach the end product again. Yet some did, turning up on the SD card. Was it instilled and installed by the mysteries of Woodthorpe Court, with the hobgoblins, 
spectres, gnomai, phantasms, ghosts, the grotesque succubae, extraterrestrials, ectoplasms, spirits, or the Fata Morganas that have been sent to taunt, irritate and terminate my already limited saneness of mind, which I’m already battling with Diabetic Doreen Dementia and Cogniscent Impairment Iris, to keep my marbles? Unglesitknangles!
I meandered to the wet room, returned to make sure I’d shut the freezer door after cleaning up, returned to the wet room, and deposited myself on the WC. Where I stayed for a while. Because an “It’ll come anytime now” type of sensation lingered for ages. All I managed to clear was several incontrollable blasts of wind. 
Whatever happened to the day? Where did it go? I recall Carer Joanne coming, and we were having a laugh.
earlier, I thought I was in one when Joanne was here
photo I knew nothing about until I viewed it, and it came back to me. Anyway, here it is.
The sun did come out today, as it was about to disappear over the horizon. The frost is now mostly melted, but not in the areas the sun did not reach.
I thought at first that they looked like snow clouds. When Carer Chris came, I heated a steak pastie, told him it would soon snow, and showed him this picture of the clouds. He looked at his computer on his phone, and the weather forecast didn’t mention snow. So much for my humble and wrong predictions. Hahaha! 
I was not doing very well in the concentration stakes, then, aha, another summoning from 
the innards arrived; 
I’m getting beyond the capability of concentration now. 
Meatless pork sausages, chestnuts, and tomatoes. Six slices of Milk Roll bread, one for each sausage, and a dip of BBQ Tomato ketchup. Two desserts: Lemon and custard and jelly.
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I meandered into the kitchen to check the faucets, and the cooker was not left on.
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No green hues this morning in the wetroom view photograph. But it was really blue, instead.
It was still too early to take the rubbish bags to the chute. So, I made a mug of Glengettie tea, changed the old-fashioned calendar clock, and cracked on with doing the blog catch-up. 
Suddenly, abruptly almost, I felt like a poorly person. I was so glad that I kept some medications handily near the computer. It was as if all the ailments launched an attack on me, well, some of them. Toothache Tiffany, Blocked Nose Ned, the cracked lip split, the nose started bleeding again and 
kept peppering me, giving me a rest and then returning for short periods
I had taken over as the prominent ailment leader. She stayed a good while, giving way to me now and then and paining me. But she didn’t have me over, despite her best efforts. I shouldn’t have said that with so many more hours to go; pushing my luck a bit there!
First sighting as I put the kettle on.
Is it a fire or not…
Still no brigade.
Is it looking worse?
No response.
It’s dying down a bit, I think.
I think the man was having a bonfire to get rid of whatever he didn’t want anymore. I was surprised that no one had called the Fire Brigade. Mind, I didn’t!
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I woke up with the regulation jerk and jump. I got on the side of the hospital bed and tackled, freeing the nocturnal pouch from the day bag. Carer Kimberly told me it was 6 on the NHS Richter scale card. Then I looked at the clock, seeing it was only 0350 hrs. I pondered getting back into bed, but
moment.
she was a little delicate, and I feared she may give way in me. This thought was forgotten as soon as I’d 
. And I hobbled at my best attainable rate to the wet room… I didn’t make it in time. 
. I don’t need to go into any detail, do I?
Kicked off, naturally. But physically, I am used to this happening. Mentally, 
To the kitchen to make a brew of tea. Why should this calm me down? I don’t understand, but many folks do the same.
ome out well. So I bravely went out onto the balcony to take more pictures of the state of the roads. Starting with the front car park. 
Finally, through the right end window of the end car park. After trapping my finger and 
I’d had until now. I think I’d only been up for an hour; what else is in store for me? Hehehe!
I took it to the main junk room and to the computer thingy.
. I knocked the tea mug off the desk, dropping it into the waste bin. 
I stopped to take some more pictures of the weather-bashed view. This was of the bottom field below the tree copse. Some kids had gotten plastic sleighs out and were having fun. I got the Kodak out when I saw the kids, but they had gone by the time I returned to the window. (Is this Possibly an unnoticed seizure?)
all short-term affairs, which suits me.
other pains, but I didn’t realise how much they were bleeding. Bless Her ♥. 
Blimey, I saw the fog descending as I returned the mug to the kitchenette. There had been cold winds, a bit of rain, then snow, and the fog was coming on. Almost eyra looking.
As I write this, I just glanced at the balcony, and the fog is even thicker now. Mind you, I think I’m getting thicker—physically and mentally.
I tried to put on the Oligarch’s Fibre rediculously exspensive full-of-repeats Virgin Media TV. But it would not let me. No Signal came up about 2000 times in response to pressing the button. So I gave up. I was getting weary of this.
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Waste bins sorted.
Reet rainin’ this mornin’.
Phor!
End car park mudslide.
No Carer arrived, which is the same as last night.
Topped up the Nurses’ and carers’ treat
I made a brew, then changed the clock calendar and got it on the computer to make a belated start on the blog.
I found two snaps that I took last night and forgot to put the SD card into the camera. Better late than never.
Kicked off.
Thankfully, I had some pain spray for the teeth.
Teatime views.
The legs looked better than yesterday.
A better shot of Devonshire Avenue.
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why? Then I’ll tell yers. I first went into the land of bliss as I was watching TV, and… unbeknownst to me, I moved into the hospital bed. When I decided to get up, I wondered what the heck was happening. (Thinking that I was in the recliner) I looked at the clock and saw the wall about 4 inches from my nose! Hehehe!
the bed, I checked the clock; it was 05:10hrs. I got the bag off of the catheter. There was not much urine in it, and it was of a top-rating colour on the card.
I wanted a mug of tea, so I went into the kitchen, checked taps, etc. and took two photos of the morning view, and it was fogless for the first time in three days.
So, the pictures looked semi-decent compared to the foggy ones taken over the last few days. I decided the next job would be to get the 
done.
I realised I’d not got the tackle needed. So I fetched the bath towel and Kagoule, Kaftan, Thobe, Longshirt, or whatever you call it, from the hallway. Returned to the wet room, and showered, and shaved.
Apart from a little difficulty getting the fresh Protection Pants on, all went so well that I thought it might be a last treat from the almighty before the Grim Reaper arrives. Haha! 
as seen, I blamed Constipation Conrad.
performance this time. I have never been so close to a voluntary evacuation before without it happening!
I got the tea made and reset the retro 1970s-style clock calendar. Then I 
back as fast as possible to get to the Porcelain Throne again! Yet again, apart from Starmer, someone must have been watching over me. Because it was as close a job to things escaping as it was on the second visit! Phew! 
When Kimberly left, I thought about what to have for nosh tonight. I had a look at the food available in the kitchen, fridge, cupboards and freezer
I put some spuds into the slow cooker. Then, what did I do after seeing the morning view getting more blue? I took a photo; in fact, I took two. I’ll blow this 
second one up.
I’ll have some Golonkowa later on the meal. I love pork knuckle. This Polish can of it usually have plenty of pork jelly included. Very nice! I’ve got the memory of the taste coming back now.
I was tempted to nibble at the LU Cookies, my new favourite biscuit nowadays. If I open the packet, I may be tempted to eat a few, spoiling the dinner later. So, I resisted the temptation. It’s easy when you are as determined as I am to do the right thing. Alright, I only ate 
.
mid-conversation.This time, it seemed I just looked like I’d fallen asleep, but I was muttering. I can recall nothing of it while I was out of it. Then, according to Selina, I started carrying on from our conversation… after a few words, I drifted off again. I think it was good that someone had seen it as it happened. But she said it frit her a bit.
I think I took this photo earlier in the day. But midst the seizures, I managed to miss it off then. I do that a lot, you know… miss things off.
These I took when I went to the fifth mug of tea of the day. I did manage to drink one of them… I think I did. I’m all over the place mentally now.
Ah, I just saw the circle I put on this one on the left. Same snap as the one on the right above. I’ve blown it up. I’m hoping that someone can determine what it is. Well, I know not what it is. Is it a bird? Is it an alien? Is it an Angel? Or is another freebie donation being delivered to Starmer as a backhander?
Golonkowa, pickled beetroot & water chestnuts, cheesy no-butter, buttered bread rolls, and some tasteless potatoes that need the sauce to flavour them. The biggest disappointment? The crap, bland, going soft tomatoes!
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The result was I gave myself a bloody nose by losing my balance as I bent down to open the Catheter Valve yesterday. Then, while wiping the flow from my nasal holes, I started my cracked lips bleeding. I rather hope that they do not start again today! (They did!)
talking to me, but I was not receptive and unable to. 
As soon as Richard departed, I got the kettle on. Taking this photo from the kitchen window of morning view. Feeling more myself all the time.
after drinking the small mug of tea and getting the computer on, the day bag filled almost to the maximum. In fact, it was the backflow discomfort that made me aware of its need to be emptied again. Not only that but in the jug was nearly 800ml of waste water! I think this happened yesterday as well. It continued to fill up all day, but not as much as this one. In the middle of this emptying, no spillages!
I didn’t mention this but decided, as it had happened, I would. I had to scoot off to the wet room to use 
the Porcelain Throne when Richard was here. 
,
I collated the waste bags into one and placed it near the front door. 
I’d hit the catheter day bag, a decent wallop with the edge of the door. I laughed it off and returned to the main junk room to get the computer back on and update the blog. I would think it was about eight to ten minutes later that I realised that urine from the pouch was trickling down my leg! Once more, the sock, leg, foot and slipper had been self-unrinated on with great venom! 
Such shame, disgrace, ignominy, humiliation, and indignity!
When I zoomed in to take this picture from the kitchenette window, I got a sense that something was wrong or not right. Different somehow compared with yesterday’s viewing. I spent a ridiculous amount of time and kept returning to look with the naked eye. Was it just that the sun had sneaked through, lighting up the scene? I’d enough to worry about as it was, but this bugged me. I gave up and got on the computer. 
I went to make a brew of Glengettie and took this snap of the sky on offer. Then, it dawned on me what the difference was in the previous photo.
Imitation fish sticks, potato chunks, sliced bread with a bit of Marmite. Followed by a pot of jelly with three small pieces of satsuma in it. Very nice! This year, for Christmas lunch, inmates at His Majesties Prison New Hall will get to choose from Moroccan vegan roast, Salmon & dill fishcake, Roast turkey with pigs in blankets, and sage and onion stuffing with complete trimmings. Christmas pudding (vegan option), ice cream, Swiss Roll or banana & custard. For free, of course.
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Terrible, sad, bad shot of the urine bag.
The leg and ankle ulcers looked a smidge inflamed.
Yesterday’s Trotsky Terence’s comeback was short-lived.
Got the waste bags sorted out.
Made a start on the blogging.
The urine was getting a little lighter in colour—good! It was also flowing well. This shot was taken 25 minutes after the previous emptying and contained just under 800ml.
.
I went out on a hobble to see if I could find him. I gave up and hoped I’d done right in admitting the chap. Later, I went to lock the door and saw a packet not there before on the radiator. I think some meds from the chemist had not been delivered earlier. I wish they had called to inform me.
2140 hrs: Carer Chris arrived as I was plating the meal, so no photo was taken. It was a good one, though: beef in black bean sauce, roast potatoes, and extra seasonings.
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At 05:30hrs, I emptied the urine pouch. While doing so, I decided to close the computer down and run a Ccleaner session. Then turn off the 
computer, and get the Ablutions & Medications sorted out. 
would not let me nod off. 
medicalisationing, apart from Little Inchies Fungal Lesion, seemed to go great!
Dried and dressing gown on.
I restarted watching the film. And fell off into bliss again, missing the end of the movie! Grumph! But I do need the sleep catching up on
The sleep was a little longer this time, but I shot awake with Electric-Shocking-Sherida blasting away at me. She’s such a persistent ailment! I gave up on sleeping. Sherida had beaten me again! I took a photo of my beloved old-fashioned clock calendar. Nearing 15:00hrs. So I had to rise and get on the computer to start blog catching up all over again. Will it ever end? Hehe! I mustn’t moan; I think in between Carers calling. I got around five hours of sleep. But, I need more yet. On with the blog!
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Another partly full-of-beans awakening this morning! And why not? I’d been blessed with 8hrs in bed and only waking up with a jump three times. Yes! 
even when I had to hasten to the Porcelain Throne, I accompanied myself with a few toneless Elvis songs. And the urine I’d just emptied from the jug was a 6 on the NHS scale. I wasn’t overly worried. Then I changed to an Acker Bilk Song, ‘Bona Sera, Seniorita’, following up with Adam Faith’s ‘My Last Wish’. Yes! I was aware of my upbeatness and enjoyed it! I was bounced back to reality when I went into the kitchen from the wet room. 
I soon found myself in an instant depression 
. Self-hating, spitting, self-lambasting, and swearing began! Then 
and 
I got the kettle on to brew a mug of Co-op 99 tea. Then I opened the window to take some snaps of the morning views on offer. A genuinely blue sky looked 
impressive from where I stood, holding my chest, trying to ignore Anne Gyna’s stabbing, moving around the torso’s chest pains.
A mug of tea and I planned to make a start on the blogging.
The holiday foods arrived with a few more treats. I had a heck of a job getting the stuff into the freezer & fridge, more the 
freezer.
new stuff. Tsk! 
d
Checked the tracker for the delivery.
Battered fish balls, terrible potatoes, two none-butter-buttered cheesy cobs, pickled water chestnuts, pickled mushrooms, garden peas, and a Lemon Fool dessert.