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Whoopsiedangleplops, Accifauxpas, Errors, Dark, Dank Depression Darius, Tumbles, Frustrationes, Mistakes, Embarrassments, Humiliations, Explosion, etc.
Each of the daily emotionally challenging visitors above seems to be an embedded, permanent aspect of Inchie’s daily life. (Well, I say life, life, that may be an extended pretence for his existence & struggles as he continues to survive, wondering what for & why.) Inchie can’t recollect the word he was going to use at this precise moment. Today’s main offenders were:
Whoopsiedangleplops, Accifauxpas, and
Depression Darius. Much of the day’s events will be missing or brief due to the inordinately long time it took to implement countermeasures after the explosion. I used the word explosion here to catch your attention. Hehe!
Not to mention the pain caused to Bad-Back-Brenda, Fractured Knee Frank, and a new head injury incurred when sorting out the after-effects of the calamity.
Hope that got you wanting to know more with bated breath? The clean-up operation took me over three hours! With another hour & a half worth of help from the Carer on three of his calls. The entire flat has a sweet, pungent whiff floating about this morning, seventeen hours after the incident was cleaned up.
The volatile liquid covered the whole kitchen floor… more later, in between the usual boring stuff I pen.
Have I whetted your appetite for the story?
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A lousy night’s sleep, broken waking, worrying, nodding off, waking, worrying, farting, nodding off, waking, belching, Shaking Shoulder Shirley belting away, nodded off, woken up this time by Twitching Neck Ted, fell asleep…. Enough of that.
Ejaz arrived, medications given, a full-body check, Phorpain gelled, toes and ankles creamed and medicated. Fresh socks put back on.
Care Mizra called. Pouch checked & emptied. Painkillers and Peptac given. I mentioned the NCC email needing clarification at a council link. He got it up and led me through filling it in. Which was great. Had he not been helping, there were times, if I’d tried to do it on my own, I’d have made errors. Saved the day, got it done. Thanks, Mizra!
Although I didn’t realise it at the time, had I done so, hours and hours of painful, Accifauxpa-inducing cleaning up the mess could have been avoided.
Which verifies my rotten luck, I’m always getting up to investigate noises; was it the tao overflowing, the water alarm, had something fallen over, etc. and always (but not this time, Oh, no! I could spit) check!
NOW, THE HAPPENINGS BEGIN!
As Mizra departed, I thought I heard a noise, similar to when someone doesn’t fully shut the door, and as they opened the foyer door to the lift area, the flat door slammed shut in the draft. It was just like that sound, so I didn’t even give it much thought. I was getting back into doing the Ode for the blog.
A mistake that cost me so much angst, pain, and took me hours to clean up… As I stood up, about an hour later, to make a brew, I could smell something but not identify it. To the kitchenette door and stopped so suddenly, I dropped the walking stick. All I could see in the kitchen was what I thought was water covering 80% of the floor! A panic came… I started shuddering and shaking, but knew that I needed to turn off the tap, which meant walking into the deep water. So I did. Walking stickless in my haste. One step into the 
kitchen, I saw that the tap was not running. I looked up at the ceiling for signs of incoming water, but there were none. Then the smell hit me, and I felt giddy. I realised then that it was bleach. I looked at where I’d left the 5-litre container of thick bleach, seeing it on the floor, burst open. I thought casually as I recalled then, ‘Well, that’s me in the shit – Again!’
Damned good job that I had so many rolls of kitchen towels at hand. I threw them into the water as best I could to help soak up the bleach. Then foolishly stepped forward to get the paper to go all the way into the kitchen, and all but slipped over on the thick bleach. I used about five kitchen rolls’ worth of paper and intended to give it a few minutes, then see if it was safe to add more paper. 
Then realised that my Kagoule and dressing gown had made contact with the bleach! They were rotting away as I looked at them. I strangely thought this could make a horror movie that people would believe, Hehe!
BUT IT GOT WORSE!
I withdrew from the battleground into the wet room, tore off my dressing gown and Khagoule, and placed them in plastic bags for the rubbish chute.
Had a rinse, and got another dressing gown on, as I did, there must have been some bleach dripped onto the floor, which my foot found and Whoopsiedangleplop, down I went, oddly enough, catching and activating my alarm wristlet as I crumpled onto the shower chair. Struggling up onto my feet again, I heard the NCC monitor controller speaking. Went to the room and said I just had a tumble setting the alarm off at the same time. But, no. I explained about the bleach, and she asked ARE YOU INJURED – No! “We can do nothing about your water. Wait until a Carer comes. When is one due?” About 2-hours. If it is a leak, call our maintenance or repairs.
Thank you, kindly, [Tut], I rang off.
Back to the kitchen and spread some more paper towels to help soak up some of the bleach, left it for a few minutes, then went back to gather what I could into waste bags.
Have another go with fresh towelling, and then I began the slow, painful job of mopping and rinsing out the mop often. This involved rinsing the mop in the sink with cold water, then using the wetroom tap to part-fill the bucket for another pass over the floor. Naturally, the bucket needed to be rinsed after each use. Using a small jug to get the wate
r from the sink to the bucket. The smell got to me again, and I kept feeling a bit giddy. I did this six times in all. I had opened the windows. This snap on the right was how it looked on the fifth attempt. I was in a lot of pain by then. Back, shoulder and a new bruise on my head. As I collected the last of what I could, I had to leave the areas between the cupboards, 
the stove, and the fridge; it was just too painful to get down that far. I filled three more big bags with the bleached, covered towels, bringing the current total of eight bags taken to the refuse chute. I pressed on with mopping the kitchen, but that bleach wouldn’t come out at all, without a fight.
On the bright side, it cleaned up my fingernails nicely. Even if it did ruin my new dressing gown, slippers and Kh
agoule, all waste-shutting with a few words RIP style proffered as I sent them 12 stories down in the chute, to the big bins below.
I only bought you both a month ago,
It’s so sad to see you have to go,
Hope it doesn’t hurt you, though,
When you land twelve floors below!
Carer Ejaz finally arrived, and I told him of how my blog-writing time had been further deprived. Showed him these photos and told him of what I’d been through, the time lost, the pain, and the frustration. Yet, amazingly, nae astoundingly, nae, mind-bogglingly, a miracle… 
had not dawned or visited me, yet! Yes, I was angry, a smidgeon sorry fo
r myself, maybe. There was certainly an inkling of self-sympathy lurking in my mind.
But when the air had cleared, the blood had bled, the pains subsided, and Ejaz stuck into helping, and the kitchen was beginning to look clearer and safer, I had a short, curt visit from,
When I sat down after Ejaz had departed, I anticipated falling into the wonderfully welcoming arms of Sweet Morpheus. But, No! Fractured Knee Frank, Back-Ache Brenda, & Shuddering -Shoulder Shirley, ki
cked off at the same time. It was like someone turning a pain switch on, instant agony. I thought it was bad enough while doing the bending, but now it is worse than ever, as Victor Meldrew’s catch phrase went. I Do Not Believe It! When Ejaz returned for his last call, he had planned to tidy the kitchen, but didn’t. Why?
He recognised the state I was in purely pain-wise.
Ejaz took a snap of the little bruise on my head for his records at ICC. Then he made some instant mash, cheese with ketchup and sausage for my meal. Not wanting me to get up from the c1966, £300 Oxfam charity shop-bought, wincingly grotty, beige-coloured, crumb-covered from my nocturnal nibblings, itch-making, uncomfortable, positively unhealthy, and dangerous, no longer operational, virus-breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, Catheter-tube-trapping recliner. He even suggested I don’t move into the bed, rather stay where I am, the effort of climbing into bed he feared would set off the othe
r ailments.
Also snapped shots of the view from the kitchen window for me, since he knows I like to take them for the blog. The Carers have been a treasure for me today. And how, why, did Deep Dark Depression Darius stay away? He did get one fleeting visit in, but was it worth 
his efforts? I think not. But I pray tomorrow that he keeps away.
Perhaps I was so busy, and in so much pain, he didn’t feel the need to get at me as much? Nae!
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seemed a little bare.
The end car park mudslide!
Rainy day.
Much-loved by WordPress readers and bloggers is getting-on-a-bit (Doug’s) Andy. Full of character. He’s had a lot of medical treatments, some that scared us, but the lad came through again. Bless Him!
Morning brew.
Ayup, the sunshines out!
Sun on its way now…
A closer shot…
Out a bit…
A final twinkle, as she does fade
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Food Delivery
More sauces?
Did I say it was a rainy morning?
Rainy evening.
Not a good day, but I’m sick of moaning.
A greenish raiony shot of the end car park late on.
This black bean meal, yes, I ate the third of the meals; the others went in the bin. Messy, mess.
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I think Ejaz also Phorpain-gelled the right shoulder 
. And colour-coded the urine pouch.
Not sure how I managed it, butk the door closed to and I trapped my arm in it. Hey-Ho!
The first effort turned out artistically. Tsk!
Made a better job on the second.
It all came to a halt. Gawd knows how long, or even if I can get it going again. I resigned from computing and got the meal served up.
Beef curry with Teryaki sauce and water chestnuts added. The curry was from a can, but it was okay. I thought that the Teriyaki sauce went well with it.
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get my balance, and entered the room, and got my pants down, ready to sit down on thePorcelain Throne. The ecrement, in the form of a gigantic fat torpedo, started its escape straight away, but froze with a few inches of it outside. 
It was my Ocado order being delivered.
but the bleeding had almost stopped now. So, a wash and back to the kitchen. Got some good stuff in today.Cooking sauces, 
sourdough bread, coffees for the nurses, etc. 
Back to the computer.
The man from the NCC, I think, arrived. So many things, questions I could not answer. These concerned my pensions and banking. He went through the files lying around, then had a quick look in the cases to find the details he needed. I know, well, I think I know they are in there somewhere. He rang the bank. They 
will send details, and I am to ring him when I get them. No idea what his number is. He rang someone else, the original pension company, I think, but not sure what the result was. Must have been a failure. He did his best. He said he would call next Friday.
The intercom sounded; it was Amazon delivering yet another computer keyboard and a mouse. 
I made the nosh and left it to marinate. Sweet & sour chicken ready meal. With added water chestnuts, red chillis, and Tiryaki & Gung Po sauce. H
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. It feels like it is about time for it to be done. But then again, what do I know? Very little with any certainty. A lot of self-doubt and ever-present suspicions that what I am doing might be wrong. Hehe! 
Got up late, took these
Later from the balcony
Getting used to the warped keyboard now.
Eerie-looking end of the car park.
Beautiful distant shot.
Front car park.
There is a reason that today’s meal looks sort of radioactive tonight, well, a few.
: Refused to let me read the instructions on the ready meal packet. Spy-Glass-Gloria didn’t help either.
, as long as I moved each spoonful to the left of my mouth to chew, and it took some chewing, too!
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visitation. The first hour or so was…well, fantastic!
houlder, & lower back and 
. Which also helped with Arthur Itis, and’s pains eased a little. I thanked him, and off he went, throwing me a ‘Tara’ as he left.
I dropped the tray in the kitchen!
Did I cry? No!
Tired, weary, confused, worried,
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e some hassle while I was sleeping, and that was why she was more stinging than usual? 
an iced coffee later. Ejaz issued the morning medications, tablets, and medicine. Then got some 
Phorpain Gel on my right shoulder. Checked the scuff marks underneath the Catheter straps, and applied some of the acne & eczema cream on them.
ies, olive-oiled my earholes, and used the Anusol or Germoloid creams on Harold’s Haemorrhoids yet. I had probably written four 
lines of undecipherable bad writing on the notepad. Oh yes, I’d also undergone a visit tothe Porcelain Throne.
Started the Friday blog well late in the day. I went to make a brew of Glengettie, which I’m sure of doing. Not sure if I actually made one. Why? The haziness dawned. I started on the computer and found myself doing CorelDrawing and Painting, in between other things. I got myself in a right pickle, and forgot all about this blog needing to be done. Ho
urs later, it dawned on me, at the same time Darius dawned. Nothing had changed from when I was mindlessly, but contentedly making mistakes in CorelDraw, doing things that didn’t need doing until Sunday… I think.
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with me.
: what the heck had I ordered now? I went to the Amazon site.
Then, wandering off topic again, I put the clothes that weren’t yet properly dried in the wetroom, leaving the bank-balance-buggering immersion heater on to get them dried. Hanging on the shower rail. I used the long picker upperer to get them up. Being in the wet room reminded me of something… I still had not completed the Phoo test kit for returning to the Bowel Cancer Programme at the Queen’s Medical Centre Hospital. Fancy me forgetting something!
and red Leicester cheese, in the bowl, bashed and mashed together. 
pickled green tomatoes, and red peppers 
A last snap of the amazing, most baffling, out of touch, disoriented, out-of-the-loop, abstracted, inattentive, sidetracked, absent-minded Saturday of this year. The sky in this photo turned out a smidge brown?
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A few scars on the right leg were treated with cream. A few knew welts had appeared since yesterday.
It took me an hour on my first try to understand the question, but the solutions did not work. This might have been due to my not fully understanding them, since it involved going into settings I had earlier left alone because they were so confusing. Many of the instructions I followed to the letter, to find whatever I was supposed to click to get 
through the maze of options, would not appear there. I asked a Carer to look at the settings page to ensure it wasn’t me, and they weren’t there in plain sight; sight being my main problem. 
NEXT! I was struggling with the CorelDraw problem for 40 minutes, then put the computer in Sleep Mode, made a brew of tea, drank it, and then went down to move the washing from the washer to the dryer. The snag I found with the delicate mode was that the clothes felt wetter than usual as they went into the dryer. Back up to my cell… no, flat, and carried on getting nowhere with the CorelDraw problem for 40 frustrating minutes, getting nothing else done, blog not yet started. (Didn’t get around to it until late Saturday.)
NEXT! Then, I tackled the problem of the still-damp washing I’d collected. I 
Then, the ten-minute max £35 charging toenail cutter arrived. Lovely gal, but annoying to my bank manager. Haha! I managed to get the feet washed; a bit 
of a job using the picker-upperer to dry the feet with paper-towelling before she came, and she put fresh socks on for me after snipping the nails – bloodlessly, too. She also put on athlete’s foot powder.
CorelPaint to complete 
of unused wheelchairs and walkers on the balcony! Two walkers and three, I say three bloody wheelchairs I’d bought! I’d forgotten all about them. Something else that, another job that got lost in the ether of depression, frustration, and impossibleness of abiogenesis and the endogenousness of life.
Later, still no advancement in the CorelDraw mesh problem, I went to make a brew and en
again, and things were getting to me now. The lack of blog progress, ailments and my unknown cock-ups on CorelDraw & Paint.
heter playing up, making Little Inchie bleed, very little urine getting into the Catheter bag, even after the Nurse checked it out? Toothache, too. 
Into the kitchen to get the kettle on again.
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Early morning.
Every time anything takes away or breaks my concentration, I end up with a leaking Catheter valve cause I haven’t shut it or haven’t shut it properly.
the socks off, a bowl of water & Dettol to wash the feet. Agony to reach down to dry them, which makes me feel dizzy and of balance, and sometimes brings on a seizure. The intercom rang…
The delivery person kindly put the things into carriers for me. I got them into the kitchen. And set about putting them away.
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Meat paste, Flora No Butter spread, coffees for handing out, Dried cheese to flavour the instant potatoes, and Mushroom Pâté to put on the soft-sliced milk roll bread. I had these tonight.
Soft, uncrusted wholemeal bread.
Sauces to go with soups, instant mash, and stews.
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