Inchy: Wednesday 14th May 2025

15/05/2025 / Inchie / 4 Comments

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First time in Parliament? Expect irregularities,
Want to accustomise? First, you should acclimatise…
Be the awarest, awesomest, & awfullest,
Knowing your foe’s weaknesses can only be wise,
Also, consider if you really do realise…
You need to know your foe’s atmospherics,
Beware the ethereal, but listen to their fallacies,
It’s essential to avoid verbal catch-22s,
Ignore the incompatibilities, self-contradictions,
Their abnormalities and ambiguities…
Lies, debasements, and talking contradictorily,
They use these cons daily, customarily,
Use reverse psychology on Keir’s bootlickers,
Digressions and deviancies are expectednesses!
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Protect yourself, avoid the moral shanghaier,
You can’t miss him, the PM, Keir Starmer,
To gain faith, become a backhander…
He likes Arsenal, cash and things ocular,
Look left, right, you’ll see a thimblerigger,
Starmer’s lies shoot out sort of spicular,
Just sit there looking nowhere in particular,
You’ll be surrounded by psychobabblers,
You’ll be increasing your cash in your coffers,
Your unchecked expenses for acupuncture…
Toilet rolls, lipstick, maybe garden furniture,
Computer… owt to increase your filthy lucre,
If, by chance, you got in under Labour,
Keir will let you catch hylomania!
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Manky day.
6 stitches.
CorelDraw charged me £345 + VAT for the new version. Why can’t I get any help with these things?
I loaded CorelDraw—and it crashed! I can’t save or export anything. I took eight photographs and doctored them before discovering this wayward glitch. They are gone forever.

I wish I was.

Two phone calls from the surgery, but I only understood one of them.

The laundry room dryer was packed up. Joe, on his way, put them in a different dryer. He had to go down to collect them, and I took a tumble, bending down in the dryer and picking up socks. I think I dropped more socks than there were in the drying. I guess I’ve become an addicted sock-dropper?

My leg growths were bleeding when I took an earlier tumble while sorting out the clothes not needed in the junk room.

Broken-hearted, what a bloody day!

I finally got some food at 22:00 hrs. I can’t use or publish any more graphics or photographs, but I have some old ones I might use. I’m fed up with the mangled, broken, toothache-ridden back teeth.

Lower than I’ve felt for years now.

More medical callers, and a food order tomorrow. But I’ll try my best to get CorelDraw working. Or, I’ll find time to sort out a ploy to get around the problem. Possibly a smidge of blind hope?

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TTFN
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Inchy: Saturday 10th May 2025

11/05/2025 / Inchie / 8 Comments

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I didn’t particularly run, more absquatulated,
The plans for the attack were soon abrogated,
The CO’s plans seemed so distorted, aberrated…
2nd Corp was soon abscinded,
The enemy got so aggravated…
Our armour arrived, defences were annihilated,
Remnants withdrew, not chicken-hearted,
Their ammunition, fuel, expended…
We were welcomed and adulated,
Winners, victors, it’s complicated,
Yet war is not globally hated?
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05:30 hrs: I had a verbal and emotional argument with myself. The Inchy part of me wanted to get up and do the ablutions and medicationings, then get onto the computer and try to catch up with my blogging. However, the other, being in residence in my brain (EQ Inchie), wanted only to give up and stay in the comfortable, snug bed to try to get back to sleep again. We both partly agreed with the other.
As we argued, we removed the nocturnal bag from the day pouch, and things turned unwanted! A bit of panic as a rear-end evacuation started on its own accord – I fumbled my way to the wet room.

Carer Ejaz treated the catheter contraption
wounds and bruises.

Kitchen view.

Sweetcorn fritters were put in the oven.
20 minutes of cooking time.
Two hours later, I took the burnt food from the stove and threw it away.
Tsk!

A microwave meal is sorted.

Sorry that there’s not much on here.
I spent more time out of it than with it.
Mini-seizures, I assumed.

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All the best!
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Inchy: Tuesday 6th May 2025

07/05/2025 / Inchie / 13 Comments

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Sore throat, cough, something bronchial?
Gargle salted water, no NHS for owt medical,
Cycling on the pavement, a constable…
Gives a lecture, then a clip around the ear,
Nicking coal so you could have a fire?
Another clout around my ear on the agenda,
MPs just didn’t appear to be bribable,
Nothing known then as biopsychosocial,
Although the air was barely breathable,
DC power and electric shocks could be lethal,
School? Maths alphabetisation & survival,
No mobile phones, colour TVs or drones,
12” records with scratchy sounds,
Didn’t go through the lights on amber,
Getting to the moon just didn’t matter,
No such things as the BNP or Asda,
Reading a comic was our adventure,
Years late; See you later, alligator!
A talking & walking test, no alcoholometer,
We bought potatoes 12½d by the barrowful,
Cwt today? Costs £150, astronomical!
Cars? Austin A30, Rovers, Ford Anglia,
Standard Vanguards the police’s option,
Poverty, to us, was the normalisation,
Our nights in were with the mouth organ,
Nights out; A drink, film, hot dog, depression,
Or beers, & involuntarily emptying your bladder,
In every pub or shop, you’d see an Arthur,
They showed colour films at the Astoria,
But they were costly at 2/6, half a dollar!
Despite my having dementia and amnesia…
These things I can still relate to, & remember,
Cause life then held some fun and pleasure,
So, I’m ready to go, whensoever,
Would I like to live again? Never!
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Big Iceland order

Fresh foods

More fresh foods
I did get some packets and nibbles.
But the photos seem to have escaped!
I CAN’T WORK IT OUT!
Admittedly, it may be the after-effects of the one and only (up to now) Seizure I came out of a few minutes ago.
I’m not grasping the problems or dealing with them very well. Of the eight photos I took of the order delivered, I can only find four. They were on the internal memory. Nothing else. I tried both SD cards and plugged in the transfer thingy, and a couple were there, so I tried again to upload them.
They didn’t show up at all?
I gave up and sulked a little. I tried again but had no luck; now they have also disappeared from the SD card!
I believe the problem is me.
When I tried a third time, I still had no luck, but I did find three meal photos I thought I had lost!
When?
When? Could they be old or already used?
Aha, last night’s!
So, what’s going on?
My grip on things has been loosened!
To make matters worse, the Doctor can’t see me until June. Carer Joe tried to get through this afternoon, but there was a massive waiting queue! I’m giving up now. I’ll see if I feel more with it in the morning. I know. I’ll go to the WP Reader and reply to the masses of comments I have received. Hehehe! Both of them.
Bit of an unnerving spell, this no-gripness!

Can’t recall taking this one

To this scratchy-looking shot
while making the meal

Slurp!
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TTFNski!
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Inchy Today: Friday 2nd May 2025

03/05/2025 / Inchie / 18 Comments

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STRANGE FACTS YOU MAY NOT WANT TO KNOW,
Things that happened as I began to grow,
Dad decided that to the park we would go…
To watch the cricket, I thought, oh, no,
I get more fun looking at a Picasso,
Can I go on the swings, Dad?
This seemed to make him mad,
He said, keep quiet and be a good lad!
I sneaked off for a walk about a tad,
Carrying football boots, I saw a lad,
I went to watch their game, naughty dingwad.
Trying to open the gate, I was tugging…
Hearing Dad’s voice, I hid absquatulating,
He didn’t see me; I found that amusing…
But not the following crushing…
It was my thumb, and it was bleeding,
Dad came over, saying… What a state!
“Thee thumb ends chopped off, me mate”,
The lad who’d run his car into the gate,
I recall his language was articulate…
Apologising, so there is no need to altercate,
The ambulate arrived, its bell ringing,

They took me to the children’s hospital A&E,
Put me on a waiting hall trolley,
A nurse checked the thumb & bandaged me…
Said that she’ll be back shortly,
I waited and felt a little sleepy,
Took me to the treatment room swiftly,
Said, “We’ll have to sew it back on” curtly,
Which they did, and very neatly,
Back out into the hallway…
You’ll stay here as a cautionery,
“You have been fearless, not cowardly!”
So, I had coped with the calamity,
I turned to look for a lavatory…
And had another Whoosiedangloppery,
I fell off of the trolley,
It doesn’t feel like it, but apparently…
But that was back in August 1950,
When they got me up, I’d broken my knee!
The start of my run of being unlucky,
What have I done successfully?
I’ve about run out of currency,
Born with the world’s tinniest ever Willie,
Cancer, shot, Peripheral Neuropathy,
Glaucoma, Cataract, at 23 I became a baldie,
Being nearly drowned later made me a deafie,
Got made redundant when I was 63,
Then, they fitted a mechanical aorta in me,
Cartilages giving way, then Reflux Roger,
Then the devil infected me with Anne Gyna,
Haemorrhoids, colour-blind, then another catastrophe,
Ingrowing toenails, having to pay for chiropody,
Hearing aids, spectacles, & lost my mobility,
Taxed on my pension… Oh, did I mention…?
Starmer stole my winter fuel allowance from me!
I cannot claim to have been over-lucky,
I may need help psychosomatically,
Psychologically, I live abnormally,
I’m getting help, the falls team agreeably…
Will visit to aid my recovery,
They will help me significantly,
The Carers do, definitely…
But it’s all too costly!
I am a proper moaner,
Most of my ire is self-anger,
Leaving hot taps to run colder,
Doors open, fridge flowing over,
I’ve turned into a grammaticaster,
Many traits & skills that I cannot master!
No point in becoming a reprehender,
Starmer’s done well, and he’s a cheat & liar!
His father was a toolmaker,
That’s true; he made a useless one named Keir!
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Less time left than ever before after making this Ode!
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04:15hrs: I woke, removed the catheter pouch, and went to the wet room to get the cleaning up done &
sorted out. I was feeling, well, not perkier, but better than I have done for a few mornings.
I checked the computer email in case any of the medics had sent me an update.
I realised the snaps below, taken last night by Carer Ejaz, are rare. ‘Rain’ was missed in yesterday’s blog. I plead Guilty!

There were no cuts, and the bruised eye looked bad. Not really, but it made me sound brave! Hehe!
The ulcers and were far less vivid this morning.
Some new growths had appeared near DVD veins.
At teatime, I showed Carer Joe. There were new ones, and those in the photo had been leaking from a tiny spot on top of each one that had dried hard.
Another of the Mysteries of Woodthorpe Court, with the hobgoblins, spectres, gnomai, phantasms, ghosts, the grotesque succubae, extraterrestrials, ectoplasms, spirits, or the Fata Morgana that have been sent to taunt, irritate and terminate my already limited saneness of mind, which is losing its marbles?

Mini-seizures and doing the gloriously silly Ode above ensured I spent hours and hours slogging away, constantly getting slower. Several hours were lost.

A social team member (I can’t recall the name)rang me, reminding me to call the doctors to get an appointment with her – one might as well have called Putin and asked him to kindly stop killing people; the result is the same.
Apparently, the Doctor asked Matron Jackie to tell me to make one. Then, the Doctor requested that Social remind me. I can only get there with a Carer on a Wednesday. When Carer ‘Joe’ rang for me, he was told that the Doctor does her home calls on a Wednesday. After talking with the organiser, the best he could offer was for fifteen-thirty, on the fourth of June. But this is only protem. Carer ‘Joe’ said he’ll see if he can get cover or make changes for that day. He’ll have to ring them back to make it for another day if he can’t get things arranged for that day.

The costly nail cutter from the hair salon came up to do them at ‘ten minutes’ notice. This threw out my plots for the Ode and delayed me even further. Tsk!
I’d just had a mini seizure and was not totally compos-mentis. Nice gal. Hurt a bit on the ingrowing nail toes. In fact… ARRGH! Hehe!

I’ve got a potato in the oven to try making cheesy spuds. But, on a low light. It’s the last call of the day, Ejaz, I think it will be. He’s due over the next hour; I’ll not start eating until he’s gone. Then, the feasting will start. Hahaha! I’ll turn the heat down on the oven so they don’t burn.

Back with an update in T’morning’!

Good Morning!
Carer Ejaz arrived.
I took these snaps of the sun going down with my (donated) Kodak 2a.
Then, about a minute later.
The sun was moving down quickly.

The ready-made meal was shepherd’s pie, a baked potato, and two cheese-topped bread rolls.
Another tasty meal! Great!

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All the best of luck!
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Inchy Today: Tuesday 29th April 2025

30/04/2025 / Inchie / 4 Comments

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Today, Three Nurses
With one hearing aid battery being a no-go.
Communicating and hearing was like an echo,
5 hours of visits, blogging went on a furlough,
Lots not done. Showering I had to forego,
One nurse checked me from head to toe!
Nothing on underneath my Kimono,
She was kind enough not to laugh, though,
BP was taken, all good, bar my temp a bit low,
All asked questions, a mental inferno,
Matron identified I’d now got impetigo,
One entered an area where few do go!
Appointments made to see a medico,
Arranged a visit from the Physio,
Neurology & Mental, I like it, I know…
Walker & wheelchair coming, out I can go!
Feeling cared about is totally Whack-O!
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WHAT A FLIPPING DAY
AGAIN!
A Quick rundown.
With the few photos taken interspersed.

Before the mayhem started
A six-rated night pouch.

Seconds after taking this snap, dizziness and a sudden loss of balance hit me. (No idea what brought it on) It was still with me when Carer Ejaz arrived.
I tried to explain to him how I felt. I’m not sure if he understood me or if I comprehended what he was he was saying to me.
He’s a likeable lad, though. He got the prescription medications issued. Then, he fitted my diabetic socks. Ejaz rated the pouch-urine a 6, and then he hoovered the carpet a bit. Ejaz came up with a logical idea as to why I felt so distant, maybe because I’d been having a nocturnal seizure before getting up. A clever idea that was from the lad. On leaving, as per usual, we swapped a bit of Nottinghamian language between us, both saying ‘Tara!’.

I got on the computer to start updating yesterday’s blog. It was a bit of a slog, as I still felt oddly disoriented and confused.

I’d forgotten or failed to remember (Hehe!) that the JS food order was arriving early today. (Fancy that!)
Got the fridge stuff sorted.
Then, the freezer
Refilled the nibble boxes.
And the drinkies
Protection pads, kitchen towels, Bovril cubes, Maryland Vegan cookies, Kung Po sauce, a can of garden peas, and, to my delight, a loaf of my beloved Milk Roll sliced bread!

Putting the things away, I heard a clatter; something had fallen down between the cooker and cabinet.
I couldn’t see what, or where, it had fallen. So, I took a photo with the flash on of the gap. It turned out to be the spyglass that I had tried to clean last week, which I had filled with a mixture of bleach and water. I utilised the picker-upperer to retrieve the magnifier.
That spyglass is not having a lot of luck, is it?
I’m not either, it had broken!

The sun came out strongly, and I hung the thin dressing gown up on the curtainless rail.Ten minutes later, I took a photo of this snap through the window. Looking suddenly bleak?
Ten more minutes later.
The sun broke through again.

THE INTERCOM RANG
A nurse was on screen, and she shouted, “It’s the Nurse,” And the screen shut down. Thinking this may be a nurse calling about the seizures I’m having. I made my way out to the lift, as I’d never seen this nurse before. To greet her as she exits the lift and show her to the flat. Alway’s a gentleman. Hehe! I waited about half an hour. However, the nurse never made it to the flat.

I had another blast on the blog. I haven’t done much, and I had a feeling things weren’t going to!

Nurse Jane arrived from the… It’s a long name: The Community Rehabilitation, Falls, and Service for a Physiotherapy and Occupational Therapy Assessment Session. Questions and answers.

As she left, Matron Jackie Arrived.
A deep question-and-answer session.
I’ll cover both of the Angel, Mainly because I can’t remember which said what. I’ll use Angel to cover Matron Jackie or Nurse Jane, as I got confused about which one asked what and the advice given.
Jane took my blood pressure, including systolic and diastolic readings, Pulse, and temperature, after reviewing the record list on my Excel sheet. I mentioned how they had been a lot better over the last two weeks.
Angel said she would ring the doctor and ask for me to be referred to a specialist about the seizures. (If indeed they are seizures). They will get me a four-wheeled walker and try to encourage me to walk more. Referred me to a physiotherapist.
The Angels asked me about the seizures and the nature of the falls I’ve had. I couldn’t answer many of the questions on this subject, but I did tell them that falls have caused these after-effects, or rather, I corrected myself that the after-effects have caused falls. Loss of balance and giddiness may occur at varying intervals after each seizure. The matron called ICC, ‘Intercity Care Company’, and asked if Carer ‘Joe’, whom I had praised to her, could ring her when he got the chance. Angel said she is going to see if extra hours can be found to get the Carers to tend to my ablution sessions. Hmm?

Carer ‘Joe’ did the evening call.
I’ve still not done the ode yet!
Might have to make it a short one. But, as you may have noticed, I do get carried with them. Hehe!
He told me he’d rang Matron Jackie. Who told ‘Carer Joe’ that the wheelchair would arrive shortly?

I love it being cared for and about! 🌼🧡

I set about cooking the beef and vegetable stew in the microwave. I had everything prepared earlier and put it in the fridge, ready to go.

UPDATE as of 16:40hrs Tomorrow, Wednesday!
So far behind again. A small price to pay for the Angels who tended to me. 💗

THE MEAL
Beef and black bean ready-made meal, with a can of minced beef, flavoured with Marmite and Bisto.
I added a can of garden peas, some pickled water chestnuts and chickpeas from the fridge.
Very Nice!

Put the TV on to watch Heartbeat and had an ice cream cornetto. As I drifted off during the adverts, the mobile chirped. A message telling me the Amazon battery order was 8 stops away from me. Needless to say, I’d forgotten all about it. Tsk!

I checked on the tracker and thought the red disc indicated that it was outside the flats.
A semi-panic visited me. Amazon is infamous for leaving ordered goods downstairs in the ground-floor lobby to be stolen. So, I went down to have a look, but nothing was there. I dare not go out to look, as I had put on my slippers and Montsuki and forgotten to take the flat key with me, which has the fob on it, to get back inside the block of flats. I was nervous about leaving the lobby, thinking the delivery would arrive if I went back up to the flat.
SAVIOUR OF THE PROBLEM!
Carer Ejaz turned up. He waited for the van while I hobbled up to the flat to check in case Amazon had told me via email that it had been delivered.
WOT A PLONKER, I AM!
The tracker told me it was still eight drops away. Then I realised I’d looked at the red circle, which is where I live, a green one was where the van was!
How I got that wrong really annoyed me!
I went back down to Ejaz, who had kindly waited downstairs to collect the batteries, and then returned to the flat.
Minutes later, Saviour Ejazz came in with the batteries. Now, I can retake photos and get the clock powered up in the morning. Ejaz put the night bag on the bed and removed my diabetic socks. I had to reheat the leftovers of the meal later. Gave me some requested Peptac. Then he gave me a body check-over, barrier creaming my bottom, man breasts all around, my belly and both ankles that he thought were looking worse than yesterday. Bless Him.

I finished of the rewarmed big bowl of fodder.
I’d missed the Heartbeats again. However, I found a documentary about the 1940s and the war on a channel with subtitles.
Carer ‘Joe’ made the last call. Another gem here. He tends to understand my problems, and we had a little chat, and off he poddled back to his other half.

I may have to curb my blogging soon, as I have two more appointments this week and three next week already. Physio, the Doctor. Rehabilitation is then followed by the Disabled checks. A 4-wheeled walker and wheelchair are arriving, one tomorrow. Someone to go through the hospital beds functions with me. I am awaiting confirmation of the Audio Clinic, Glaucoma, and Neurology appointments.
As if it wasn’t hectic enough now! Hahaha!

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Struggling, but hoping – I think, Hehehe!
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Inchy Today: Monday 28th April 2025

29/04/2025 / Inchie / 9 Comments

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Teeth, physical and mental decay…
Tea for me, not spirits or Chardonnay,
An unnatural interest in doomsday…
Armageddon, & Heavens Gateway,
Not now and then, but every day!
And the seizures, causing mind disarray,
I spoke of these things earlier today…
To the Doctor, who showed no dismay,
She’ll send the Matron to see me one day,
A mid whirling away with quixotry,
I may be a visionary, but eccentrically,
Veering at times to idealistically, romantically,
I talk to myself morosely & querimoniously,
Questioningly, enquiry, feedback? Uncertainty,
How does my mind work? Well, wontedly!
Options & choices made unintentionally,
This realisation can bring on despondency,
I’m more interested in the pain from my weenie,
I’ve awaited the catheter bag job since Friday,
Carer ‘Joe’ did it yesterday, all nice and tidy,
I can now be called a Pfropfschizophrenie,
If this classification is given to me,
10 days wait, affected Little Inchie hurtfully,
And rear-end furuncle hurts excruciatingly,
Well, not really, there’s been no lachrymosity,
But unexpected signs of lugubriosity.
Mild depression and a hint of melancholy,
Depression Duncan & High Horis are legendary,
They rule my emotions alternatively,
Duncan’s visits seem to last an eternity…
High Horis’s calls are more synoptically…
Which is another thing that’s a pity,
Things to do hygienically, well, hyperbolically,
Just the furuncle to be doctored, ointmentedly,
Oh, I must not forget to medicate Little Inchie,
And give Gladys Glaucoma’s eyes a spray,
Then, empty my pouch of pee,
Then I might do a spot of gymnosophy,
Make food to satiate my gulosity…
Hello… Two visitors from the constabulary!
If not arrested, I’ll tell the story on Tuesday!
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MY MENTAL CHANGES!

Pre-morbid cognitive Impairment: Refers to cognitive deficits present before the onset of a particular illness or disorder, such as a psychotic disorder or dementia. It’s essentially an estimate of a person’s cognitive functioning before any known or suspected brain damage or dysfunction. Measuring pre-morbid functioning is crucial for accurately assessing the impact of a disorder on cognitive abilities, as it provides a baseline for comparing and evaluating the disorder’s effects. Regarding my mental assessments, I’ve had a few; here is a list for your reference.
2015: Vascular Dementia
2017: Diabetic Dementia
2019: Mixed Dementia.
2022: Posterior Cortical Atrophy
2023: Cognitive Impairment
And now…
2025: Pre-Morbid Cognitive Impairment
I assume the nurse coming to ‘Do an assessment test’ may just be related to the latest Pre-Morbid version?
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Gone 17:00hrs Already.
Quickie from here on.
I got carried away with the Ode again! Of course, the Whoopsie & first aiding slowed me down.
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In short…
Graded later by Carer Ejaz.

A sit-down visit first
It only took me 20 minutes this morning.
ROCK SOLID!

ABLUTIONINGS
WHOOPSIEDANGLEPLOP 1:
Carer Ejaz did not mention the blood on my dressing gown and down my face and legs when he arrived. But midday Carer ‘Joe’ did five hours later. He wiped what he could and asked me how I managed to cut myself nine times. I had no answer. But we did have a bit of a laugh.

WHOOPSIEDANGLEPLOP 2:
Moving the catheter pouch to clean it, I let it slip, and the weight of the urine caused… what can I call it? Well, agony as it tugged on Little Inchie! The blood flowed. The applying and rubbing in was painful. Then again, it always is.

WHOOPSIEDANGLEPLOP 3:
I was pressing on with the teeth, then shaving, and almost finished when the blood dripped onto my man breasts! Tried the Brut aftershave to stem the flow. It was a smidge futile.

WHOOPSIEDANGLEPLOP 4:
After finishing the cleaning and addressing various areas that needed medicating, I started applying the fresh PPS. I got the shakes as I was using the picker-upperer to raise them, Clanger! As I grabbed the stick, the wobble began. The prongs went straight through the material, hitting poor little Inchie right on the end and the fungal lesion. Agony did not cover the situation this time.
More medication, more hurt, and more frustration.

WHOOPSIEDANGLEPLOP 5:
Then the pains started from Harold’s Haemorrhoids as well as the base furuncle!
I considered sobbing a little but didn’t bother.

As I came out of the wet room, I realised I’d been in there for an hour And a half as Carer Ejaz arrived.
He did not notice the bleeding head, neck or blood down my leg. And I’d forgot all about it too. Haha!..
I nipped into the wet room again to wipe some blood off. Of course, it came back on later.
Ejaz put the short diabetic socks on my legs. Then, he issued the prescription medications.

Photos taken, not many.
The end car park shot, just as yesterday, proved that we required rain… PPPlease!
I took this one through the kitchenette window. The shadows on the house were from the block of flats. The sun coming from behind.
Well, there was no blood when I checked on the legs now, so the furuncle and fugal lesions must have stopped. Carer ‘Joe’ did the midday call. He wiped the semi-dried blood from… wait for it… the top of my head! I don’t shave the head; no need to. He also noticed that I had cut a facial mole on my cheek and an earlobe.

WHOOPSIEDANGLEPLOP 6:
I’d been on the computer toying with the Ode to try and get it something like I was hoping for. I took this photo of the calendar clock. I made a mug of Co-op 99 tea, I pressed on for another hour or more to finish it, but I wasn’t too happy with the result. I wished I’d left it as it was now. Made a mug of Glengettie tea
Getting back to the computer, I noticed the time on the clock was 07:35hrs? I can’t have been. I was in the wet room, crippling myself at that time. Then, being the youthful, educated, logical, keen, alert, conscientious person that I am… I checked the clock, and it was still showing the same time. Quick as lightning, I realised that the battery must have run out. Nae, problemo! I knew I got some… somewhere in the flat. The drawer that I knew I’d put them in was in the kitchen. I rummaged through it. No luck!
I went through all the drawers and cupboards in the kitchenette. No luck! They had to be in the main computer, bed, junk room then! To my joy, I espied a box of batteries on the top shelf. They’ll do for me, I said to myself, a broad enveloped my face.

WHOOPSIEDANGLEPLOP 7:
As I reached up to grab the pack at full stretch, it gave way. I ended up in a little ruffled heap, landing on the crisp and nibbles box. Learning later that, I’d burst open three bags of crisps and a pack of cheese biscuits and bent the umbrella which was nearby. On the bright side, I used the umbrella to get me to the c1966, £300 Oxfam charity shop-bought, wincingly grotty, beige-coloured, crumb-covered from my nocturnal nibblings, itch-making, uncomfortable, positively unhealthy, and dangerous, no longer operational, virus-breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, Catheter-tube-trapping recliner, and use it get back up on my feet. I sat there a few moments, stemming the blood trickling down from my must been hit in the accifauxpas nose and into my mouth. What next?

Aargh!

A Seizure-Ridden afternoon.
Although the evening got rid of them altogether.
I don’t know why or what the reason is for this.

I added a Milk Roll sliced loaf to tomorrow’s order from Sainsbury’s. You never know; they might have some in stock.

Carer ‘Joe’ made calls, and Carer Ejaz did one too.

Early Evening shots
Both were taken through the kitchen window.

Concentration Conrad was not interested in anything I did. This short Ode was done in the morning, and he was still playing me up.

WHOOPSIEDANGLEPLOP 8:
As I was removing the hanging window dressing gown to block out the sun during the afternoon, I dropped the hanger.
It fell partly into the large jug of water I keep handy on the ledge. I grabbed it too quickly and knocked the jug of water off the ledge; down it went, watering my dressing gown that I was wearing, my socks, slippers and spread over the kitchen floor!
I believe that I may have cursed and swore!
Yes! I’m pretty sure!

After the last Carer’s call into bed, I did crawl.
WHOOPSIEDANGLEPLOP 9:
I forgot to put the nocturnal catheter bag on.
Did I mention Concentration Konrad?
After the struggle to get out of bed and the nocturnal pouch attached to the day bag, it dawned on me that I’d taken the dressing gowns and put them in the laundry bag… but had not cleaned the mess in the kitchen up yet!
WHOOPSIEDANGLEPLOP 10:
I didn’t particularly fancy doing the mopping up with the four-pronged walking stick and the mop and bucket in tow. However, if I removed the nocturnal bag to do the mopping, I would have to reconnect the tube afterwards. And the night pouches are famous in Inchy’s world for leaking if one connects, takes them off, and then puts them back on again. So, I got the four-pronged walking stick and the mop and bucket in tow and got the cleaning up done. I felt well-drained after that, and for a moment on the £300 second-hand shop-bought, c1966, moth-eaten, bedraggled, grotty, cringingly beige-coloured, much-dilapidated, crumb-containing from my nocturnal nibblings, bug-ridden, itch-inspiring, not-working recliner, I sat.
Zzzz!
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Morning, All!
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Inchy: Sunday 27th April 2025

28/04/2025 / Inchie / 10 Comments

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– – – – – PART 1,102¼ – – – –
As my past mistakes are unretrievable,
Bad memory; some things unrepeatable,
My love of Odeing is restrainable,
Even if they do turn out unreadable…
My ailments: all are irremovable,
Humankind’s future: unimaginable,
Might it include something ufological?
Or unecological, unethical, likely political,
HMG’s gone abnormal, celestial, paranormal,
Living costs rising, workers panhandle,
Wars raging, oligarchs, behooveful,
Our PM, a greedy parasitic, barnacle,
Ministers are only self-beneficential.
Labour used to be social, democratical,
Now they are Tories and demagogical!
Degenerate, corrupt, decadent, & cruel,
Their guilty deeds, open to construal,
Their faults are blatant, not circumstantial,
Keir is a blatant liar and criminal,
Misleading, deceptive, and casuistical,
Starmer is bifacial, if not trifacial…
His answers are quodlibetical…
His plans and actions are often quixotical,
His excuses for his lies are tarradiddle,
His plans either turn out theoretical,
Not that his MPs want to quarrel,
Quizzing Herr Starmer? Unthinkable!
He claims each morning, he eats eggs and quail…
Personally, I think he should go on trial,
It’s not that I want to moan or quibble,
But, for his actions & lies, he should be in jail,
With his history, he’d be good, juristical,
I suppose I’m sounding a little judgemental?
I think he’s plainly, justifiably, jailable!
Seriously, I’m not joking or being facetious!
I’d send him a daffodil or Jonquil,
Awaiting the return of The Jackal!
Obviously, politicians must be intrapreneurial,
Muslim, Christian, Jew or infidel,
Locking the git up would not be ideal,
No one else can lead the party, I feel,
Well, whoever, like him, would be funeral,
Parliament would turn phantasmagorical,
No change there, it’s always been farcical,
With the backhand takers, all fissilingual,
With their deceit, drivel and folderol!
I’d miss Herr Starmer’s verbal flummadiddle,
I don’t want to overdo it, make it dramatical,
Or make this Ode complicated or daedal,
I hope you find humour in this doggerel,
If not, blame my being demential…
That should keep me out of trouble!
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THE DAY OF THE SEIZURES
Sorry, but this Sunday was a frigging-frustrating, seizure-ridden day, with nothing getting done. Well, nothing getting finished, anyway.
On the plus side, she hasn’t been so kind to me for weeks. She didn’t kick off the first attack until 15:15 hours. Great!
But Sadra’s more than covered for her. These are the ones where I can do nothing for a few minutes after I get back to reality. A Carer came when I was out of it and told me I was open-eyed and muttering things incoherently. She was really worried. Luckily, I was soon back to my semi-senses and explained to her about what it was. It was her first visit as well.
Ejaz did the first call. And I remembered that on Friday, no one had changed my catheter bag. Ejaz, not having his bike, was on the bus, and on a Sunday, they are a rare sight. He did not have time to do the catheter today. He told me to ask the next Carer to do it. Ajaz issued the medications. Got the diabetic socks fitted, then checked the taps, fridge, freezer and cooker were not left open or on.
Then, new to me, Carer Yasmin arrived, unsure of what needed to be done. I showed her the cooker, freezer, taps and taps that need checking every call. She also did not have time to change the catheter day pouch paraphernalia. She gave me two paracetamols and a gulp of Peptac that I had asked for. She also said to ask the next Carer to sort out the catheter contraption. I’ve already requested two without any luck. Third time lucky, I hope. I’ve not been in so much pain with the tubing for many weeks, possibly months. Still, I’m hoping the Carer due in approximately three hours might be able to do it.
Few photos today, dozens and dozens of mini-seizures. Although they seem to be getting less often as I type this – Huh! I shouldn’t have said that!

I may have to ask the next caller to also put the ankle strap on, as it is playing up for the first time in many months. And they will not like that. The instructions are tiny, and the procedure, if I recall correctly, is so complicated and confusing. Still, the flaring might go down before they arrive. If they are short of time as well, it’s best to get the catheter done. That is more painful for me at the moment. Saturday and Sunday, I forgot to ask them. Tsk! No, I didn’t; I did ask Ejaz, but he didn’t have time either on Saturday. Limited bus service again. When others arrived, I was in a seizure, Ann Gyna was bothering me, or I just forgot. Now it’s beginning to hurt; I can remember to better. When it came to it, it didn’t matter. I had lost the ankle straps again. Huh!

A few snaps were taken between seizures.

First kitchen shot.
Love them clouds!

Spring beginning to green the flora!

The gravel path up Woodthorpe Park.

A later shot from the balcony of the end car park.
We’ve not had much rain lately.
This is the first photo I’ve taken for at least six months without a mudslide showing on it!
What happened to April Showers?

The sun coming down.

Washed some socks

Welcoming home his servant Doug.
I swear we can read Andy’s thoughts through his expressions. He’s ‘getting on’ a bit now, not that he shows it, Bless him. Coping well with his medical treatments, as is servant Doug. Both heroes!

I’m feeling extra tired, earlier than usual today.
An early nosh was sorted out cause I want to watch highlights of the Forest v Man City game on the TV.

Bacon in cheesy-topped bread rolls is a simple meal to cook, but you wouldn’t think the time it took to cook the bacon was far less than what it took me to try to clean the oven dish. In fact, I gave up and threw the tray away in the end!
Oh, I nearly forgot to add the pictures...
I dipped them in a BBQ sauce dip.

Carer ‘Joe’ did the last call. I remembered the day the catheter bag was supposed to be changed, according to Friday’s weekly schedule. After three ‘haven’t got the time to do it, ask the following Carer responses.
Carer ‘Joe’ had not done one before, but between us, a good job was made of the task.

I’ve no desire to mention the Man City v Forest result. But it did reflect the difference and was a fair result.

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– – – TTFNski – – –
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Inchy Today: Wednesday 26th March 2025

27/03/2025 / Inchie / 7 Comments

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Past & Present Thoughts
So many things I have not achieved,
Things unknowingly that I’ve advocated,
Things to which I have affiliated,
Wrong understandings assumed…
Opportunities that have been annulled,
Politicians’ lies that I’ve absorbed!
>>><<<
So often I’ve been beguiled,
I’ve also a record of being brabbled,
I’ve been shot twice and bastinaded,
PN made me often bloviated,
Several times been mugged, & burgled,
Several times a day, I get baffled!
>>><<<
I don’t want to be cryopreserved,
Or have any part of me conserved,
I’d like to have my cancer cured,
And to painlessly pass a turd,
I’d love to be less mentally tormented,
I’ve no fears of being terminated!
>>><<<
In my youth, naughtily I malappropriated,
From guilt, could I be manumitted?
With a nurse that was matriculated,
We twinned, merged, merrily mangled,
Verily, this memory is now mullered,
I loved it when we miscegenated!
>>><<<
I may have, at times, over-pontificated,
Nowadays, I’m more likely to be perturbed,
Many of my plans have been precipitated,
Not one of them now, have prevailed,
Far too often, I’ve been pasquinaded,
I’m a proletariat, pseudo-sophisticated!
>>><<<
My life was challenging, fun, spirited…
Worked its way to getting shemozzled,
Little happened for which to be satisfied,
How often do you think I was shanghaied?
No opportunities to be a symposiast,
Now mentally & physically subjugated!
>>><<<
Now, put mildly, I often feel depressed,
Disregarded, unnoticed or uncontented,
Always when Depression Duncan visited,
Doreen Dementia’s confusion is unprecedented,
Short term memory, to the ether, unremembered,
Long term? That’s nowhere near as affected,
>>><<<
Thinking back to do this ode, I excogitated…
It’s not really clear or well elucidated,
But I was not very well educated,
I considered having it expurgated…
But that would entail it being expedited,
Although it’s no worse than I expected,
>>><<<
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Help with the laundry from Carer Ahram. Who also went through the paperwork with & for me.
Telephone calls from the Doctors’ Surgery.

The INR DVT Clinic, confirmation of the INR being too high and to make sure I’d got the new dosages sheet. Reminding me to check that the carers are giving me the correct dosage of Warfarin. The lady sounded a little concerned about this.

Matron Jackie telephones. She is going to try to get me help with the shopping. I will only need one trip to Sherwood a week, and it will only be for an hour each week. She also said she would see about getting me a wheelchair for the Caregiver to use to take me shopping. I explained this to Arham, a very helpful Caregiver. Thanks, mate.
I spent ages drying the returned laundry on the two airers. Ahram loaded them up for me. Photos below.
So I didn’t get this blog started until late Thursday morning. Gonna be a quickie again.

Nocturnal pouch

Calendar Clock

Laundry waiting to go.

Damp laundry put on the two airers, by Ahram.

Dressing gowns hung up.

Gobble, Slurp, lips smacked!

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TTFNski!
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Inchy Today: Tuesday 25th March 2025.

26/03/202526/03/2025 / Inchie / 10 Comments

– – Jolly Good Day! – –
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My beloved Tree Copse: free of adversity,
I used to walk through it, daily,
Stopping to talk to a bush or tree…
Or a feral rat, a being-walked doggie,
Crows, insects, I once saw a garganey,
I loved these copse-walks initially,
But now I’m not up to it, even weekly,
I can see it from the flat’s balcony,
But it wrangles me intractably,
My health I consider detestationally,
I can’t even walk up the entrance pathway,
Cartilages, Arthur itis, Peripheral Neuropathy,
Glaucoma, Anne Gina, too much you see…
I adored getting out & about, naturally,
Maybe one day? I’m thinking miraculously…
But I won’t, I’ll never have the ability,
Bad enough being incapable physically,
Reality is harder to cope with mentally,
I wonder if the plant life & animals miss me?
Bird poo, that dropped on me seemed aimingly!
Those crows knew how to poo accurately,
Trips & tumbles, bites & stings for free,
I miss my daily walks so atrociously,
I can’t manage the uphill bit unaidedly,
The downhill bit would be just as risky,
This ode has brought on a feeling of inefficacy,
I still love my Tree Copse, albeit incongruously!
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I had a slightly better kip last night. Still broken up, but at least I know why this time. The guilty ailment was chiefly . She was persistent with it. I think I may have had a few nocturnal seizures as well. So many wake-ups, but my response was different for some of them, and it took me a lot longer to get back to sleep after a few of them. There were none of the episodes and a few of the . Did you see that? I was being diagnostic, investigative, and problem-solving, on the verge of being semi-logical in my assessment of the night’s kipping difficulties?

I removed the night bag from the day bag, and bending down, I got a visit from … that was a bad one. In the late afternoon, while on the computer, he called again and was even more effective. I had a good few today.

I perked up a little, made a brew of Glengettie, and turned on the computer to finish Tuesday’s blog. It was a breeze! But it took me five hours due to basic errors a ten-year-old would be proud of.

It looked bleak outside, with a bit of drizzle.I did some hoovering and sorted the waste bins. Then, I felt guilty about the mess in the wet room that still needed to be cleaned, so I went to the wet room.
1
I only mixed up with the gear I just stacked up to make room to do the mopping! I landed on the pile of the shower chair, buckets, mops, bowls and towels, knocking them over and hitting the trolley and the cosmetics, gel, disinfectant, bleach, aftershave, toothbrush, scissors, and some medications. Now I’ve a bruised rib cage.
Miraculously, I didn’t go down to the floor and stayed on top of the rubbish. So, at least I didn’t have to crawl to the junk room on all fours to drag myself back onto my feet! Phew! Thanks lads! 🙏🏼

The Caregiver arrived, Ahram, I think. Or was it Joe? It was almost definitely one or the other. After I got the medications sorted and my socks on, the door chime rang out. It was the Asda delivery. While I was taking in the groceries, I had another of those danged dangerous Whoopsies!
2
My carer Ahram was assisting me to get the groceries in the door, and , gave way and I dropped the walking stick. I slid down with my back against the wall and plumped on a pack of six (approx. 5-inches high) mini-mineral spring water bottles onto my bum. With both knees doubled up, Arthur Itis and the Cartilages were agony!
For more than one reason. Both knees, the cartilages and as I found out later, the bleeding haemorrhoids where I landed on the water bottles!
Both chaps set about getting me up again. I thanked them for being there at the right time to rescue me, get me on my feet, and get me into the chair! Carer
Ahram set to putting the fodder away, so there were no photographs of the food, as there usually would be. When I recovered, I took a snap of the fridge, freezer, and the bladder-demanding water.

The fridge.
The freezer.
The waters.

I took another kitchen window shot.

The day’s original Beloved Copse shot.

To the left of the window and down a bit.
(Do you recall ‘The Golden Shot’?)

The time has flashed by with little getting done other than the blog.
The wetroom is still in a mess.
The Haemorrhoids have stopped bleeding at last.
I think I’ve gained some more bruising on the ribs and back. And for some reason, my top and bottom lips are now bleeding. Huh!

Will I ever again get a decent injury-free day?
Or a night with some unbroken sleep?
Silly questions to ask!

A ready-made beef in gravy with colcannon mashed potatoes. I added the last can of minced beef in gravy, carrots, and peas. Added some Marmite to the mixture and stirred it all up. Just four minutes in the microwave & it was ready-to-eat. It tasted superb! It was so good that I didn’t eat any of the bread.

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Constipation, Anne Gyna & Seizures,
Two tumbles, Trouble w’ catheters,
Doreen Dementia, more Accifauxpas,
Arthur Itis, Peripheral Neuropathy,
Harold’s Haemorrhoids were oozing,
Glaucoma Gladys, things hard to see,
No time to start feeling lonely,
I was never truly alone today!
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TTFNski!

Inchy Today Monday 24th March 2025

25/03/2025 / Inchie / 10 Comments

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Oh, for a night’s sleep, to inveigle,
A full night’s sleep would be incredible,
Lack of sleep is so depressional…
Causes, multi-varied, the seizures aberration?
Steve’s Thought Storms, all choplogical,
Anne Gyna, having a resurrection?
Duodenal Donald, so damned painful,
Twitching Neck Nigel’s jerking motion,
Shaking Shaun with a misguggle.
Doreen Dementia being nepenthean,
Is the catheter malfunctional,
Arthur Itis, cartilages, fungal lesion,
Cognitive Impairment, to confuddle,
Back Pain Branda, nightmare confusion,
A Grizelda dream, feeling coital,
Mechanical aorta, piles, corporality,
EQ visits and being oblectational,
The usual imprecation & malediction,
Guilt, vilification, ankles inquination
Last night was more confusional…
No sleep, but no real reason…
Causing me aggravations,
Not any pain from my bunions,
None of the usual causes?
Do I need some detoxifications?
Why? What causes my sleep dysfunctions?
What are the justifications, & reasons?
What were or are the causes?
What’s ruining my nocturnal hibernations?
Maybe I’m having noctambulations?

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Rush job, it’s a devil trying to catch up with so many jobs to do. I assume the Carers & Social are arranging for the domestic and financial hep visits to be started, eventually.