THE SUICIDAL TORY FUTURE
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Got bedded down last night, well, this morning at around 03:20hrs, and low & behold, 
was waiting, ready to start again. But I did get off eventually and had nearly three hours of bliss. I would have stayed in the £300 second-hand shop purchased, c1966, welt-causing, uncomfortable, not-working, itch-inspirational, crumb-containing recliner for longer; Unfortunately, Dementia Doreen’s compatriot, 
, convinced me on waking, that it was Monday! So I thought I had a delivery coming between 7 & 8, and it was already 07:15hrs; a semi-panic-mode was engaged and I got up in a bit of a rush; Dizzy Dennis visited, lost balance, and I sat down again, with a foggy head.
Then I realised it was Sunday…
The Night Pouch
At first glance, I thought I’d been mysteriously passing spaghetti through Little Inchie and 
. Hehehe! Too dark a colour.
The legs look a little rough again.
No pains with them, yet.
Got some spuds in the crock pot.
Then felt the need for the 
.
Well, 
was done after three days. But of course 
meant a mess to clean up.
Waste Bags Sorted.
Carer Rahmat arrived. Did the issuing of the medications, eye drops, painkillers & Peptac were given. A little natter, which I appreciated. Took her BP and temperature. Very good, see above.
I felt so different again this morning. Plain weary, but the balance was much better. I got on with the mammoth job of catching up on yesterday’s blogging. Things started annoyingly…
Amazingly, I changed the Wi-Fi option and it came back! Very slow work this time. I feared I might even fall asleep in the computer chair. I must try to get some decent sleep in.
I was amazed again, at how the time flew by – it was the midday call already. The blog was making progress, slowly. Rahmat at last accepted a drink I offered a choice of. Bless her!
Got the blog posted at long last. And made a start on the Ode for today’s Inchy Today. I think it took me over three hours, and then later I found spelling mistakes in it. 
, I think my concentration was getting far worse the more tired I got. 
Still, could be worse… couldn’t it?
Still struggling with the editing, and I forgot all about taking any photos until early evening. I’d been nibbling; in fact, I ate all of the remaining Le Petit bikkies!
A banana, a choc ice, an orange ice lolly, and as of now 19:10hrs, I’ve not made or wanted a mug of Glengettie?
This is singularly worrying. It’s never happened before? Could it be the mysteries of Woodthorpe Court, with the ghosts, wraiths, spectres, cacodaemons, apparitions, and other grotesqueries that haunt the hallways and lobbies, searching for Inchie to curse with bad luck, create ambiguities, abstrucities, perplexities, misfortunes and botherations, to scare, worry and confuse me!
Very peculiar situation. Not only not drinking tea, but failing to take photos of the clouds for my pareidoliaing!
I took a snap of the afternoon sky and grabbed another orange lolly from the freezer. Hahaha!
Bootiful!
Continued with the blog for several slow-moving hours, and went to take photographs of the later evening. I was struggling then 
and 
were making it difficult for me to control the camera and use the selection buttons, but I had to give up.
Carer Benjamin arrived. I hadn’t heard him, cause even if I had hearing aids in, I couldn’t hear the dooorchime when in the kitchen or wetroom. He was right behind me and made me jump a smidge. Which brought a much-needed smile. He’d been standing there a while and noticed how I was struggling with the Kodak. He whipped out his mobile phone and took these photos for me, bless his cotton socks.
Then a closer shot of the houses.
That was kind of Benjamin.
So I took a snap of the lad.
Offered a cold drinkie in thanks, and he got the medications sorted. Then the eye drops were put in. He’s a clever lad, and noticed the shaking in my… well, all over really. Hehehe!
He’ll be back, just like Arnie, later for the Catheter night bag fitting. After Benjamin departed, I got on with updating this blog, to here. But mental fatigue, mistake-making and lack of sleep made me stop. I hope I’ll be back later too.
Took this shot of the attractive early-night clouds.
Did some more blogging catch-up, and then Carer Benjamin returned for his last visit. During which, he took this shot with the Kodak, of the scratches & bruises on the left leg 0 which must have been acquired, Thursday, on the last of the 
falls, I’d not noticed, but sharp-eyed Benjamin did.
.
He also noticed that the leg was swelling up, compared to the state of the right one. One battered body, one distorted brain,
hearing problems, seeing problems, money running out at a fast rate, 
, 
problems; 
bleeding at the point of entry of the catheter tube. 
is visiting much more often lately, and the previously nocturnal only , is now apparently on a new 24/7 roster. My 
are scarily getting more frequent… the mind seems to just lose blocks of time altogether, and forever. None have ever come back to me, and those hours or minutes remain a mystery? Maybe this 
is making things worse?
Just thought I’d mention them. To help whippersnappers who just may read this, to know what they can expect. So, keep on with the cannabis; it helps. (Guilt developing!)
I bedded down in the second-hand, £300, c1968, overwhelmingly sickening beige coloured, tatty, uncomfortable, wobbly, germ-producing, falling to pieces, food residue collecting recliner. But refused to let me sleep, even gave me a few sharp awakenings. I got up a few times, and wobblingly carried and 
to the kitchen to take some photos of the night skies
Sunset, taken earlier.
Blissful!
Later it looked like I had a monster on the horison.
A long time later, the monster was still there?
Back to try to sleep again, and I realised how little had been passed urine-wise, into the night pouch.
Took a photo with the flash on…
.
A perfect colour though. Bet it will have darkened by morning.
Not sure when I managed to get to sleep. But recall that had me wakened twice, all the other jerking-awakes were due to 
.
May Your Fortunes and Festivities Ferment with Good Food too!
Ahem! I found this in ten seconds! Fair enough, it was designed for infants to work out. But still – 
Hehe!
, 
the box, then restart the computer. Even change Wi-Fi connection numbers each time it went down, and do the same work again!
Bejesus! What a colour!
Still dark hours later, when I belatedly emptied the day pouch.
Waste bags sorted out.
During one of the failed 
Aha, much lighter shade this afternoon!
My favourite puffer clouds to the north.
And, to the east!
Liberty-Global Internet went down a few more times.
I dropped a tablet and thought it fell in the waste bin.
Had a sort through the bin, but could not find it.
So, another dig around in the waste bin.
Then realised when I’d stubbed the toe, I’d caught the right ankle ulcer. It stung a bit, but I now had the Germolene to rub in to ease it. Of course, bending down to rub in the ointment, kicked off 
, so she got some Germolene rubbed in… at least the area I could reach. I wonder if any youngsters read this blog? They’ll, just like I did, and think it’ll not happen to be, getting dithery, dozy and daft as a brush. Haha! 
Peaceful looking?
Lights out time.
Sky again to the left.
All looking good!
Breadsticks, a banana, and an iced lolly for afters.
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Easy-Peazy! Even I found it in about ten minutes! Hehe!
giving way at the same time. Clouted my cheek on the corner of the counter on the way down with a sort of crunch-thud. Haha!
, and I completely misjudged it. I spun around, giving the door frame a half-decent shoulder charge. I turned quickly when I thought I may have left the tap (faucet) running, which did the trick. I must have splashed some of the soapy water on the floor, and soon found it! Luckily I fell against the shower chair, which saved me struggling to get back up again, at least. A good start!
The night pouch was even darker this morning, (which I don’t think is good for my chances of ever getting the bothersome and sometimes painful, always frustrating,
removed permanently. 
I went onto the balcony, to try and take a photo of the front car park through the glass.
I got some potatoes in the crockpot straight away. I did this because there’s always a chance that my ever-present, 
I spent some time sorting the waste bins out. 
Demand for the 
bleeding. So, I cleaned up and shaved, applied
As was expected.
I did Carer Chris’s later on.
Suddenly the last Carer call was done, and I hadn’t used the 
A late meal was hastily prepared. The potatoes I’d put in the crock-pot, about 14 hours earlier, were drained and on the plate. I added the last of the just out-of-date smoked ham, 
after sniffing each piece. some were removed. The yellow & red tomatoes, these were four days out of date, but tasted lovely. 
They were okay, and the view outside I thought was amazing for the early hours of the day. Taking this photo of the houses, I noticed how 
surprisingly light the sky looked for this time of day?
.
.
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, was a bully,
Looking good?
Mist clearing sooner today.
Made a brew of Glengettie, and dunked a few (3) of my newly discovered favourites biscuits. Tasted buttery, with an iota of salt taste. No bother to the bad teeth!
!
Worked conscientiously on getting the Wednesday blog done.
Both through the glass in the balcony.
The bottom field shot was an improvement.
Started cooking the meat for the stewpot.
Potatoes in the slow cooker.
My favourites came up, and knowing that a minimum order of £40 was needed, I ordered other stuff to make the required total.
Yet still, it didn’t get to me like it usually would have? Worrying this is. Also, I had a few visits from 
I poddled to the wet room to have a shave and en route, had an 
; it didn’t have me over but caused my right shoulder to wallop into the door frame. And all was forgotten about the minutes-earlier farces, and all felt, was how lucky I was not to have gone down on the floor! Even when 
The evening looked very nice.
By gum that was nice!
Straight ahead from the kitchen window…
Then to the left a bit…
A great show, I thought. Produced by ATV for ITV between 1 July 1967 and 13 April 1975, based on the German TV show Der Goldene Schuß. The hostesses distracted from the games sometimes, but… Hehehe! 
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Sundown
Close-up of the Sun
Multi-shaded tootsies
The second meal of the day – A rarity?
So many ailments attacking today. The most annoying and bothersome one was without a doubt; 
. For constant sheer pain, and causing me balance loss. 
& a particularly persistent
Mission impossible for some of the suggestions. How can the carers find time or staff to help me clear the room? They can’t supply the domestic now. They’ve had to cut down the hour, to half an hour, of financial assistance. It is the holiday period now; the poor devils are struggling. Staff are taking their breaks when they can, before the time runs out, can’t be helped mind you. I know how difficult it is, being in the same position when I was Security Controller at Sawley Security, a nightmare! Mission Impossible for them as well, re this guidance. Everything is getting behind schedule, and my already dilapidated memory is suffering; I’m trying to catch up, and things get further behind
This time, I lost all the stuff I’d done today!.
Morning moon.
Closer.
McCains…
Ha!
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Grabbed the Kodak and took some shots of the legs & feet.
I think I took this one by mistake…
A close-up of the feet showed they were still of a different colouration to each other. The ankle ulcer looks like it just might be coming back again. Nothing new there!
Removed the night pouch from the day bag.
This took me an hour and a half. The shaving did not go well. Cuts and a terribly bad job done, too. Humph!
Outside the wet room.
Hallway end rubbish and the three-wheeled-walker. That’ll need sorting with the things I need to take with me.
To my right, the kitchenette.
Ott he waste bag sorted and put near the front door.
Went down six times in half an hour.
Awaited the Link lift in the foyer.
We arrived eventually, as we were taking a scenic route so the driver could pick up another passenger en route on Derby Road from a care home. No photos cause I was belted in and could not get at Kodak Kevin in the trolley.
Only managed to get one photo inside the EENT.
We then went through each one. She decided that because I didn’t know the last blood test INR level, she took me to the DVT Anticoagulation place, insisting she take me in a trolley seat. Leaving Three-Wheeled_Walker Walter at the mercy of the honesty of the others still waiting. I mentioned en route that my catheter bag was getting full.
Arrived as I was leaving the building. Spot-on! Following are the photographs I took through the windows of the minibus. Where memories were prompted, I’ve revealed them. Haha!
Leaving the hospital to Lenton Lane.
Towards Derby Road.
Side street off Derby Road.
Another side street off Derby Road.
Derby Road nearing Canning Circus.
Huntingdon Street into the city.
Above & below…
The oh, so changed Shakespeare Street. The long-gone fire station and another abandoned building.
Left onto Mansfield Road.
A little further up…
Last Mansfield Road shot as we turned right into Woodborough Road. I recalled the old days with the trolleybuses. Even the blue-coloured Notts & Derby trolleybuses ran this route.
Huntingdon Street.
Mapperley Tops
As the rain came, the chap dropped me back at the flats.
I got swiftly out of the rain and into the foyer.
Taking this selfie in the lift on the way up. With taking this in the reflection of the shiny wall, I thought at first they’d done the wrong eye for me. Hehehe!
and…
have only been down for…
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I may have nodded off while eating it a few times. I later found some potato cubes in the dressing gown pocket, in my belly folds, and on 
; the next thing, I was waking, having a renewal of consciousness, rejuvenescence, from my preciously short kip of about an hour – in the usual fashion
Newly spotted legs.
Swelling up again.
.
However, for the first time in months, the 
Window shot to the left.
Then to the right.
Smoke & Mirrors ladies & gentlemen at 
Bit of a bigger nosh tonight. Sliced potatoes roasted, garden peas, a soy burger, fancy strawberry-filled pastry (Not that there was much filling in it, mostly pastry, disappointed in this one), and a banana to finish off with. Taste Rating: 6.8/10.
It was the doctor’s surgery with the new Warfarin doses after the blood test. The INR level had gone up a little. I changed the doses on the Carers book to the new doses.
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Woke, I looked at the clock and tried to get back to sleep, but without any luck, but I did try. 
So about 02:55hrs, I got the night pouch removed from 
I went to check that no taps (faucets) or the stove had been left on, and I got the kettle on for a mug of Glengettie.
Got the waste bags sorted out.
To the wet room for a wash and get the medicationalisationings tackled. Shortages of medications: Germoloid, Germolene, Olive Oil and Nasal Spray! Tsk!
I’m not sure if I have some new leg water papules coming up or not.
The white area on the toes seems to be getting bigger? My email, American Petal-Angel Lisa, suggested this may be Reynauds? I must look this ailment up. ♥
A big order today… Fridge products sorted…
Then, the frozen ones…
Too much bread in stock! Tsk!
Fridge cram-packed…
Bladder Belinda liquids built up…
My new favourites, are LU soft lemon-flavoured cakes. Very nice indeed. During the day I ate two of these, four shortcake biscuits and two bananas. No meal yet but I may stay awake long enough to make something. Or not!
Brown-outs had grown to ten.
I felt the warm liquid in the lower region inside the Protection Pants! I knew immediately that this was a bad one.
. And no Daktacort Cream left! Stopping the flow of blood took me ages. Messed up my legs, dirtied the floor, and annoyed me so much. Once the flow stopped and I’d spent aeons medicating, it cost me another hour just to get the floor and myself clean again. The haemoglobin seemed very thick this time?
But it was the last failure. Bless them!
Bootiful!
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Nocturnal wee-wee a little dark this morning.
Amazing… Green fluid from the bleeding teeth?
Medicationings
Germoloid and Germolene tubes getting near to empty.
The usually dithering session over which of the Protection Pants to put on. Used the smaller Asda unisex ones!
The ends of the toes are going properly white now?
Tea for two, well, just for me, I made a brew
Blepharitis gel and eye spray applied
Kitchen morning view
Waste bags sorted out
View of the balcony from indoors.
Went onto the balcony to take this car par shot of the excellently parked vehicles.
What a terrible photo! He looks like a transparent ghost in this picture. Wonder who it is? Hahaha!
with a rattling good contribution by 
. But I’d lost a heck of a long time for doing the blogging… again!
Tomatoes, instant mash with some Leicester cheese added to it, and the battered balls were done in the air-fryer. 
Even if I do say so myself! 
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The spelling mistake was on purpose – 
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my toe on the floor cabinet corner when I bent down to clean the blood from the WC. No bother, of course, not for the hero of my sturdy, manly-pain-bearing capabilities. No arghs, cursing or swearing, spitting, growling or self-pity. Well, just maybe the odd cringe and wince. Hehe!
Night Pouch removed
Washed the plates, great!
Doing the day’s blog, I came across a notepad page that was only partly completed; let me spend, wait for it… over 6 hours doing the ode page words! And it’s not finished yet! I simply plodded on uncaringly until the Carer arrived… Tsk!
Photos were taken while Carer Benjamin was here.
Caught Benjamin taking a selfie on the balcony. Hehe!
The first one.
Above and below from the balcony
Getting darker earlier now.
Looking almost scary now…
Still Bootiful, though!
Nothing special, but So-Tasty!
when I 
and down to the houses.