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I last had sex 40 years ago, in Spring,
Got shot twice in a shooting…
Cancer, so had a catheterising,
So, it ended my romancing,
Then heart operating,
The stroke, then the eyes cataracting,
I just wrote this Odeing,
For whippersnapper-advising…
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Keep lubricating & desiring,
Never stop hoping, looking or desiring,
May you both say nothing, yet you sing,
There may be spats & some ding-donging,
To keep your collusion from dwindling,
Maintain your passion and drooling,
Use tablets if something starts drooping,
Smile, say you’ll do the decorating,
Avoid any debauching & derogating,
Be you married, divorced or dating…
or living with or sharing a dwelling,
Stop your entanglements from decreasing,
Stop your romance from decaying,
Try to avoid any unwanted discharging,
You must resist being disobliging…
Rumpy-Pumpy, can be ever-deflowering,
Linger-longer, no defenestrating,
Each session should be deflagrating,
You both should be diagonalising,
After which, after doinking…
I’ll have a sulk and start depressioning!
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A CONFUSIONABLEITIS RIDDEN DAY!
Put another way, a typical, everyday day!
Mystery Photo?
Not a wonk of sleep. I was tired, but it was no go!
Got up to take these moon shots.
What happened to the moon?
It must have been a cock-up from me!
Bad to bed. No kip. Up again and ate a jelly.
Early morning shots.
Gave up trying to sleep around 06:45hrs.
Catheter pouch off & emptied.
Waste bag sorted.
A stand-up wash and sry, teeth, shave (3 minor cuts), and I medicated the various regions as needed – well, I started to. Carer Richard came for the last time ever. I forgot all about not having medicated the fungal lesion and ankle ulcer. I might pay for this later. Humph!
Back to the Wet room
Kicked in and persisted on and off all day & night. Assisted in her ‘Let’s Cripple Inchie’ mission, by 
for the first time in a while. Naturally 
frequented my brain a good few times. The lack of sleep and the new Carers starting in the morning were enough to confuse and worry me. But not enough to please the other ailments. A while later, Cartilage Chloe all but had me over, and in the process of staying on my feet, I acquired a new arm bruise.
I made a prescription medication list. I must ring for some more in the morning.
Then I made an Iceland order for Tuesday 17th March, between 8 & 10:00hrs.
I went back to the computer and saw a giant ladybird on the keyboard. It had black wings with red spots. When it flew away, I felt the draft it made! Hehe!
Summer is on its way.
I had another go at changing the photograph view tp horizontal, wide. I’d tried several times before but just could not find how I did for Kodak Tim 1 on Kodak Tim 2.
Blow me down, I did it!
The food delivery arrived moments later.
Blimey, I’d bought a lot! Marmite, potato cakes, patties and a pasty. Chips, yoghourts, Parmentier potatoes. Ready meals, cheesy cobs, Milk Roll bread…
Peas, more meals, Chinese sweet & sour…
Water and roast chestnuts, cheesy cobs, drinks, and cleaning products. Boy, did I spend!
A CRACKING SEIZURE DAWNED
I actually felt it coming on. This lost me in another world for about two hours. This time, I did nothing at all. Well, when I returned to mock consciousness, I was hanging half-out of the computer chair, and my reading glasses were on the floor! So I assume some activity took place. Sometimes, I seem to carry on blogging and don’t realise I have done so; then, I have to spend ages correcting the mistakes, omissions, and gobbledygook I’ve made. Not this time. I wondered if I had just fallen asleep.
I’m sure I explained the seizures to Matron Jackie yesterday, but I can’t recall her reaction. Tsk!
Well into the afternoon, the sun attempted to come out.
The carer is due in an hour.
I’m tired and drained even more now.
I’ll get summat to eat, methinks first. Not feeling good now. Anne Gyna is still stabbing away, occasionally along with 
.
Belly pork and potato cakes, perhaps.
The potato cakes were terrible!
Other things were delightfully tasty!
The last Meridian Carer called, Selina.
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Sleep took hours to arrive, but at least it did. I must have had at least six hours—still short and needing further catching up. But blessed, all the same! Cheers!
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Cheerio, Mon Amis!
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I’m sorry that I mentioned the seizures were fewer yesterday than lately. They came back with a vengeance!
What a fantastic dream I had last night!
, & I removed the nocturnal pouch from the day bag. Then, I 
scribbled notes about the dream on the notepad near the hospital bed.
As I made my first move to get on my feet, I was delighted I was next to the bed cause I thought I had a seizure and a visit from 
, and fell back onto the bed at the same time. Probably not, though. One or the other. That put the mockers on my plans. No way I was going to go under the shower if there was a likelihood of another seizure. The wet room floor is a lot harder than the bed is. Haha! I decided I’d do the ablutions and medicalisations with a stand-up wash and shave my feet in a bowl of antiseptic disinfectant to soak while shaving. 
I took the tea in the wet room with me, as I felt several 
shooting up my right leg. 
I utilised the Porcelain Throne first. Trotsy Terence was right back in full charge again. Surprisingly, there was a bit of pain as the evacuation sploshed into the bowl in about ten seconds. The blood could be seen in the water and felt on my bottom and legs. Now I knew! Today was going to be one of those days. I didn’t need my EQ 
to tell me, but he did anyway. Cleaning myself and things up 
Only one is left. It can’t be helped; I’m not supposed to take them anyway. Slipped it under my tongue, and threw the box away. And hobbled back to the wetroom. Finished cleaning up and got the bowl down to fill with hot water, washing-up liquid & dettol. 
e 
up to it. Even the left one looked a smidgen dodgy.
As I got up, 
I gave way, and I crumpled, aiming to land on the c1966, £300 charity shop-bought second-hand, wincingly grotty, beige-coloured, not working, crumb-covered from the nocturnal nibblings, itch-making, uncomfortable, virus-breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of recliner. I hit my bottom cheek on the arm as I landed! The blood from 
flowed and hurt a fair bit.
A late morning shot from earlier. The sun is beaming over the hill from behind the flats. Hello, another summoning from the innards.
Well, evacuation number two was almost a replica of evacuation number one. But there was no bleeding this time, I’m glad to report. It’s time
This may be one of the reasons for such a terrible night’s sleep. Along with 
and 
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& 
. 
I had hurried, but I don’t know why I hurried, stand-up wash & shave (three cuts). The medications all went well, and then I got seated on the WC in anticipation of another solid, not-wanting-to-escape torpedo to be evacuated. I got the crossword book and pen, as I settled…
Both of them turned out badly.
No snow on this, but there was outside.
No snow on this, but there was outside.
No snow on this, but there was outside.
I made the second mug of Co-op 99 tea bags.
Ready meal. Added some Marmite.
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Dismounting the bed had some good and bad aspects about it this morning. 
& 
Of to the kitchen to get the kettle on. I foolishy opened the window to take this snap on the left of the morning’s view. What happened then? I’ll tell you… 
. Frustration, shame,
self-pity, inner anger at myself, self-hatred, and a flow of curses and self-blame rang out. I felt worse after having had the same problem the 
week before last. And this time, the mess I made was even worse. 
I got the computer on the go.
I can report that after an original kerfuffle, I got to the 
this time in time! 
!
dumps in a day. I took two Anti-diarrhoea capsules earlier, which I’m glad I did now.
I updated this blog up to here.
This shot should have been on earlier, but I missed it.
Late postal delivery arrived. It was from my good cyber friend and excellent photographer, Tim. To replace the broken Kodak.
The same model that had broken it got the blotches on every picture taken.
But this one wasn’t!
or 
If we are not aware, it may be too late for aftercare,
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The night bag is sorted. NHS class 6
Carer Richard made the first call.
were obviously set on hassling me. And they did. For hours, I got nothing much achieved, yet somehow found mistakes that needed repair on what bit I had done. 
As messy as it could be!
Bags out in the flat lobby.
Started emptying them.
I ordered the wrong things, and no others wanted them. Grrr!
The fridge still had room in it!
Getting late now. Tsk!
Getting dark already.
Made an order for next week. 
I’d put this photo in the wrong place and missed it. I took it this morning to catch the seagulls as they searched for cats, little dogs, small birds or squirrels for breakfast.
rang from the door chime, and Carer Promise arrived. He was not here for long; nothing to do other than ask if I needed any painkillers and the nocturnal catheter bag to be fitted to the day bag, which the lad sorted for me.
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04:40hrs: I woke up coughing. But, after an amazingly long 
sleep of close to six hours! I removed the worryingly dark-coloured nocturnal catheter pouch attached to the day bag. I think it is a 7 on the NHS scale.
I emptied the laundry bag that Carer Promise brought back for me last night. The things were hung, and some were put on the towel warmer to dry off a little longer. All four socks had been returned this time.
I ventured into the kitchenette to take some morning shots of the dark sky on view. The lower first one came out reasonably well for once.
The second, higher in the sky, should have shown three tiny planets. Which were obviously there to my eyes but didn’t make it onto the photo. Tsk!
I made a brew of Co-op 99 tea, took it to the computer and reset my ultra-modern c1970 clock/calendar. An oddly coloured hue to this one?
had started off. Really, short ones, but far too many for me to concentrate on the job at hand.
Carer Richard made the first call.
Oh, some mail had arrived.
I went to get the meal cooked
What an enormous feast! Natural pickled beetroot, pickled mushrooms, Sopoka bacon, a pickled egg, red onions, fresh garden peas 
and some Parmentier Potatoes with herbs & garlic butter. After taking this photo, I added some Dutch tomatoes. Got down on the c1966, £300 Oxfam charity shop-bought, wincingly grotty, beige-coloured, crumb-covered from my nocturnal nibblings, itch-making, uncomfortable, positively unhealthy, and dangerous, no longer operational, virus-breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, Catheter-tube-trapping recliner. The tray under my chin so as not to spill or drop morsels on my vast belly. The result in the morning of this wonderful feast was the return with a vengeance of 
, like never before! Tsk! 
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. Doing his best to detach my head from my torso. 
I’d made mock plans. The first was to get the blog finished and posted. Then, to get down to the lobby from 08:00hrs to 0900hrs to admit my beloved Nurse Hristina. Being as the intercom had gone wrong on me. It’s still not working at all now. Worra Day!
I hauled my body from the comfort of the hospital bed, forcing every move. Then, I made a proper mess of photographing the nocturnal night pouch. A number 7 on the NHS graph.
I went to check the taps and cookers in the kitchenette. And the view from the windows was fantastic. After taking the top snap, I wondered if I could take 
a photo worthy enough to capture the two planets way up high in the sky. Of course, I couldn’t. Nothing like what my eyes were looking at. Tsk! 
After getting the blog finished and posted in a short time, I looked at the intercom to see if it would show anything on screen. It didn’t!
Arrived as I finished getting dressed. He did a rush job giving the medications, and he got my diabetic socks on in no time for me. Then I quickly looked at the intercom but couldn’t see why it was not working.
and 
to take with me. Then, he kindly went down to the lobby with me. 
Then I changed the dates on the c1970, made a clock/calendar, and started this blog. Things might get complicated in a while; I only had an hour and a half to work on this blog before needing to go down again to the ground floor lobby to wait for the arrival of the returned JS food delivery. A Financial Carer is now due to fill in my pages-long HMG Social Q&A papers. 
09:45hrs now. I’d better get my coat on ready. A smidge of guilt tickled me when I saw the hospital bed, which I thought I had straightened earlier.
The empty box had the fresh foods in it for 2 minutes!
off. The cursing returned! I’m hoping the fresh garden peas will taste alright. The cream cakes and parmentier potatoes I suspect witll have a shandy flavour to them. The beetroot was the only container that seemed shandy-free! Even the tomatoes had some dark liquid 
inside their box. The pattis had been permeated, but I think the Eclairs may have resisted the flow of shandy. I suspect the sliced red onions may have as well. The outer jar of peas and Anchor butter was sticky and wet, and, of course, I’ve no shandy to drink now!
A third round of anger and cursing ensued! 
This prompted me to take a look at the evening sky. I just caught the sunset again.
Then I took a close-up of our Mother-Sun on the horison.
I made a bread roll filled with about everything I had in stock. First time I’ve tried bamboo shoots. Can’t say I was impressed… I was also a smidge annoyed at forgetting the beetroot and pickled egg. Humph!
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Would you believe it? DVT Warfarin haematology Nurse Hristin just rang me to tell me she will also be coming to see me tomorrow! Arghh! But that’s no problem, having the kindest, most helpful nurse I’ve ever had calling on me. 💘
nocturnal pouch as colour 7 on the NHS card.
an unmoving state of mind. Despite my painful efforts to encourage the evacuation by various means, things remained motionless! 
The morning sky was back to its blue hue today. The low clouds can be clearly defined in this photograph.
a higher-in-the-sky shot.
The wet kitchenette floor after Chloe left the flat. She also cleaned the new oven for me, bless her cotton socks. She left to try to see Warden Julie about the intercom not working for me.
Afternoon shots of the dwellings around Woodthorpe Court, with the hobgoblins, spectres, gnomai, phantasms, ghosts, the grotesque succubae, extraterrestrials, ectoplasms, spirits, or the Fata Morganas 
that have been sent to taunt, irritate and terminate my already limited saneness of mind, which is losing its marbles? Then a wider shot of the loft drug growers area to the left of the window.
Sudden darkness befell!
mission. 
I zoomed in to get a close-up.
Nice enough. But with no bread delivered thanks to this morning’s 
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Nocturnal Catheter pouch, and decided to get my ablutions sorted out. Which had a few interesting aspects to it. Don’t they all, you ask? Hehe!
The medicationalisation of the tender areas did not go well. 
holding strap, sadly pulling at the Catheter tube overmuch, and the bleeding started afresh! I did not see any humour in this! I antisepticised and cleaned the left area again. While doing this, I thought there seemed to be a large amount of little spots of blood on the tissues, and it dawned on me that Little Inchies Fungal Lesion was now bleeding as well! 
I took a morning snap of the kitchenette view. I wasn’t such a green colour this morning out there. A brown tinge rather than a blue one, too!
I was heavily into doing the day’s ode, and Carer Richard arrived. I asked 
I worked on yesterday’s blog and am getting it posted early today. Whatever was bugging CorelDraw earlier stopped for a couple of hours. Ten minutes ago, it was back again. Grrr!
While the chips were cooking, the cheesey-topped cobs were sliced, no-butter buttered. Smoked cheese slices were added. And readied for chips to be added.
Pickled onions, chips, and a pot of lemon yoghourt were put on the tray. I wiped the oven tray and settled to watch ‘Heartbeat’ on the TV while eating this tasty meal!
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right. I’ve never had a more extended Ted session before. I was close to pressing the alarm-alert wristlet. I was getting a little unnerved by the Twitching. But within 5 minutes, the chesty coughing died down, and ten minutes later, 
I removed the grade 7 on the NHS chart urine catheter pouch from the day pouch. I realised the weekly Friday changing of the catheter day bag had not been done this week! No wonder I’m suffering with pain from the tubing in poor Little Inchy! But it’s partly my fault; I’ve had unfamiliar Carers calling this weekend due to the shortage of regular carers with illnesses. I should have reminded them. 
I took some early morning shots of the view from the kitchenette window. Both have the ‘blotch’ partially hidden.
the sky. I took both shots slightly higher than usual, so the darkest bits masked the blotches. Haha!
since yesterday’s teatime. They were all short ones, but this made them more easily recognisable. So I decided it would be better to go and make a brew of Glengettie. 
my knee against the cabinet corner triggered a reaction 
The tea had gone cold, so I made another one. Making sure I drank it while it was hot enough! As I took this photo, I realised I had not yet changed my c1970 antiquated, old-fashioned clock calendar. So I changed the day & date on my c1970 antiquated, old-fashioned clock calendar. Then, I discovered that I’d made 
I’d been dating all the graphics with the wrong date and had saved some as the 1st and others as the 2nd to different files! It later cost me hours to find and move them 
I was working on the ode, and 
revisited me. Boy, was this bad. I had to give up, but I did some work on the Liar Starmer insult content. My hatred for him still came through!
The sunshine was trying to come out late this afternoon. I used the loan camera from Jenny for this one to avoid blotches. It came out okay?
Another emptying of the catheter day pouch. I must remember to ask a Carer to change the day bag. How I keep forgetting beats me. Mind you, so does the cotton wool, which looks floating in the urine. Might the cause of the feedback pains be the pouch not being replaced and the cotton stuff blocking the exit tube? I must remember! 
Carer Victor arrived and woke me up!