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Inchies Ode Today was inspired by Timothy Price Photographer extraordinaire and Jolly Good Cyber-Mate
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It’s been an… erm, er… well. an interesting month so far.
I’ve been given a rubber wristlet for DNR (Do Not Resuscitate). A Diabetes rubber wristlet. These will decorate my wrists along with the On Warfarin, Allergic To Clopidogrel, Hard of Hearing, and the new last week, Dementia alert bands. The Cataract – Vision – Impaired one has not arrived yet.
I’ve checked the box of the options on the Doctor’s letter. In answer to the Question: Where Would You Like To Die, at Home or in a Hospital?
Now after the initial rushing me into the hospital when I woke up with blood coming from Little Inchie and the Haemorrhoid-ridden rear end.
I think this was four weeks ago. The Paramedics took to the QMC, A&E.
Where the medicos must have forced two gallons of warm water down my throat to get the wee-wee flowing through Little Inchy, as opposed to Catheter Cathy’s Contraption. I had the catheter put in and taken out about six times, which for me with Phimosis and the Fungal Lesion – not to mention having the smallest willy I’ve ever seen (I’ve seen ten-year-olds with a bigger one than I). This is why the in and the outing of the tube were so painful for me. And it really was testing my pain limit… mind you, it still is at this very moment. I was on the computer and listening to the new tenant’s TV blasting away upstairs. (I assume. He or she might be getting the flat sorted, which accounts for the occasional clunks and thuds. Herbert Mark Two? Haha!
No problem, though; I’ll get used to it. Just take out the hearing aids.
They did bladder scans, and some on a big machine. But gave up and sent me to the City Hospital Urology Department. Patience Ward Two.
Where Patience was at a premium. Urology was just as baffled as the QMC staff were. They had the catheter in and out over the next day, at least eight times; despite gulping down at least two gallons of water, getting to use Little Inchie for wee-weeing was a failure. They (Urology) summoned me back to have a… I’ve forgotten what it was called now.
Ah, I’ve got it now (just looked it up on the Internet). A Cystoscopy, a CT scan of the urinary tract, and a urine culture. Still, no reason was found, so the catheter has now been on for about 4-5 weeks. The walk to the Doctor, half a mile at most, took me nearly two hours! I had to keep stopping cause the pain was so bad. I got the surgery, told the Doctor, and hose said: “Talk to Urology”. It’s great to be so cared for, innit?
Anyway, since the tumble I had getting on the trolly at the hospital, week one: I had another fall. Week two: two Accifauxpas. Week three: Just the one; it wasn’t a bad one. Week four: Three tumbles, and two, one seriously, walking-into-solid-objects. The wet room door, and then the junk room door frame. Which started 
and produced a 
, that had me over – but I fell on the two bags of laundry that has not been collected. I’m glad they were days late now. Hehehe!
Today, the wee-wee into the bags seemed a little better. I reckon I’ve emptied the 
around ten times! And the blood in it was far less than yesterday’s was.
Is there a light at the end of the tunnel? Maybe… perhaps!
The 
attaching did not take place. No Carer arrived to attach it for me. I believe they were struggling with staffing problems and possibly the hospitalisationing of another tenant. No bother, I kept waking up overnight anyway, and I remembered to check the small day bag each time. Emptied it three times. No sweat!
.
With all the nocturnal activities of emptying the pouch, I didn’t get up until 07:30hrs. Little sluggard! The was at bursting point, I managed to get it emptied before any disaster!
arrived as I was making a brew. Got the medications sorted, and he helped me ready the bin bags for him to take. Said how busy he was. Thanked him profusely.
I left the hot water tap running again!
The pain from Little Inchie was still bad and stayed that way all day & night. 
and cobblers!
then 
Came at teatime.
Late morning view.
and later came.
Hyper-One Again.
Mid-Morning views.
A lot of white cars?
Catheter emptying. Nice and like colour this moring.
Magnificent Sunsetting this evening!
Catheter is ready for emptying.
Is that a twinge of blood in there, I see?
Sunset bying down…
Eerie colours changing…
Still beautiful…
A minute later, the last blast from the dying sun…
Looks like a two-tone of blood in the Catheter…
That’s a better piccy.
But look at the blood in it!!!
Argh!
Started emptying it – rich red blood…
Looks to be thinning at the end…
Almost bubbling now? Can you see a cat’s face in there?
Starting to make the evening Meal and, 
arrived.
He was looking fitter tonight but not a happy laddie. But soon cheered up when he got the new night bags to put on the day pouch. These ones had the plastic grip so you could hang them up. Sorted the medications, and we had a little chinwag. Np putting the world to rights, but we did manage a bit of cheer for each other.
When the night bag was on, the blood started to flow in dribs and drabs.
But, oh so slowly.
The long extension tube often stops the flow, and I feel the build-up in my bladder, and have to shake the blood through.
Richard showed me how to use the Air-Fryer, and he put some alphabet potato letters in it and left to get on with his other jobs.
Fifteen minutes later, the fryer gave out a ping that, luckily, I was in the kitchen to hear. What an alarm timer with one ping, and that was my lot!
The potato letters tasted great, all crispy on the outside.
The spuds I did in the slow cooker. The tomatoes were just about acceptable tastewise (Italian, not good this time of year). And the ersatz mini-franks were surprisingly excellent! Soya based methinks
Got this blog finished and posted off. 
TTFNski, EACH!
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Took this to catch the shadow of the flats.
The mist thickened l
Got a pot of porridge out and put it on the counter to remind me next time I make a cuppa, to have it for a late breakie. Hehe!
Took this shot of Chestnut Way.
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I ate most of it. Hahaha!
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Bit of blood in the overnight Catheter pouch.
Caught a seagull launching off of a lamplight.
being different each me they got a fresh supply
Down in the elevator, along the link passage through.
Started what turned out to be a bad idea.
Every step was agony. Due to the darned
. I could feel it bleeding, and it
I eventually got over the crest of the hill. I had
Within 10 seconds of my arrival at the surgery, Doctor Vindla came to fetch me into the consulting room. 
.
know that” Thank you.
?
interfering with my memory again?
.
Up to the bus stop. Caught the bus.
Went into Winchester Court and through the link passage into Winwood Court. Not many folks around?
To let them know I was back in situ.
The tiny pouch 
really was at bursting point.
But forgot to go in to check if any painkillers may have been sent electronically from the Doctor to the chemist. But I expect it had not been sent, anyway. I wonder if the Doctors get a bonus for everyone they get to join the DO NOT RESUSCITATE brigade? Hehehe!
Mayhap if they can save on not resuscitating… 
Very nice.
Arrived. Sorry I just can’t remember who it was.
Must have been a reason, I suppose?
to the 
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Two morning photos were taken between the multitude of messy, spongy, gooey 
visits suffered.
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Teatime rains
Around 19:30 hrs. Wonderful sky!
Well, fancy that!
at the thought of it!
Fiona left reminders for me about things. I can’t remember what they were at the moment. They were for the carers as well, I think.
Very nice, too, it was.
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Pity about yesterday’s little glitch. We could have had
Morning snaps from the Kitchenette
Local swelling.
New potatoes cooked in the crock-pot, then
, added the night catheter.
This was his last call of the day. And he wanted to get home.
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from the door chime.
Immediately engaged. I thought I’d overslept, and the Carer was trying to get in…
The shooting pains started from the mystery ailment again after a day of me thinking it was ebbing… 
These shooting or stabbing pains come when I use the right hand (Peripheral Neuropathy?) They said it would only get worse? I could not use the walking stick with the right hand; cause pressing down on it, raising the arm or bending.
kicking off, my spirits sank.
I thought, being as I am up and aboutish, I’d better get the 
tended to. From getting into the wet room, I noted the time on the clock. By the time I’d got the stand-up wash with feet soaking in the bowl on the floor, shaved, washed, including the area that contained poor catheterised Little Inchie, hate rear end and associated danglers and crevices; then 
applied both Germoloids & 
Germolene. Olive oiled the ear holes. Got a tiny amount of the
eye drops into the 
right eye… but possibly 80% of it on the nose, moustache, chin and stomach. I’m not mastering putting the eye drops in, am I?
The catheter had made the Fungal Lesion bleed every morning and night, so after giving Arthur Itis’s knee, I say knee, not knees, cause I couldn’t get to the right one due to the paraphernalia attached… I then tackled the lob of trying to readjust the tape holding things in place that had gotten twisted… It’s still twisted.
This daily morning performance took me two hours plus to get done. Any wonder I can’t get the blog done?
I split a pair of Depend pants on the plastic closure thingamabob, and I tried another pair. But had an
as I pulled them wide to get over the tubing, and it sprang back… and started the Fungal lesion bleeding again… which I’d just spent agony and time stopping it bleeding, so had to start doing the Dakacorting again! 
A photo here that I forgot to put on earlier.
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I then set about making a meal. Ben’s BBQ rice, a can of nearly out-of-date mechanically removed chicken 15%, beef 4%, and soya 54% hot dogs to go with the rice with added BBQ sauce. A pot of instant mash with added cheese. F
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06:15hrs: Spent the first hour of wakefulness between the wee-wee bucket and the Porcelain Throne. So many trips were needed, and all like the urine-fungal infection started last week. Putrid-smelling pee, pains starting in the bladder area, then moving all around the torso, almost to the back.
Richard told me to ring the Doctor, bearing in mind that last week I was late in doing so, nada paid the price in pain and lack of sleep. He even wrote it down on the whiteboard for a later carer to see.
Spent many hours on updating the Tuesday blog, at least five! Before getting it done. Accident and mistake-ridden, I’m sure. All to the accompaniment of the blasts of tap-tapping and bang-banging with either sawing or drilling noises supplied by the blocks the smart-alecky, insensitive, unsympathetic, toffee-nosed, self-important, naff, noisy nasty man, from the flat above on the 13th floor?
gave another blast of thudding and knocking; just to keep me on my toes. But it was a shorter session this time. Phew!
just gave a little, almost musical again a blast of mechanical abbellimenti, with tempo and rubato. Once again, it didn’t last too long, but he was putting plenty of effort into it. I do hope that he hasn’t broken his hammer or chopped his chopper off, and that was the reason for his sudden silence. Or had too much of the Single Malt Whiskey and fell over, cracking his head against one of his train engine models. 
Better get summat to eat then.
while watching TV. I was having an odd dream, something about frustrations, involving me working in a giant office complex. Couldn’t get out of the building…
Was not too keen on letting me get to sleep, so I put the TV on. That helped. I nodded off as the first round of adverts came on.
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05:30hrs: I stirred, and as I began to move, I could have sworn that the room was full of people who stood around drinking, like at a party around me! Oower!.
I got some spuds sorted for the crock-pot. Rubbed in some Ben’s smoke flavouring, let it soak in, and placed the dish on top of the microwave for later use.
I went all industrial and work-ethically minded; when I remembered Sister Janet and Brother-in-Law Pete were coming later.
Next, I tackled a bit of cleaning up on the mini-hallway.
Once able to, I rose and went in to make a few of Thompson’s Punjana tea.
I got the Friday blog finished and posted. To the accompaniment of Herbert’s clang, tap tapping.
or 
turned up. I was in a mental pickle. Unsure of what happened then, but I recall going to the elevator to speak to Jane & Pete and thinking I’d forgotten why… no, I’m sure I forgot. I was well-confused by then.
Ah, yes, I recall it now; we (Jan, Pete and me) went on the balcony; Pete said they had to park at the end of the buildings. I suggested we take a photo of it. I did it on the Lumix, and Pete used his Samsung Galaxy S22 Ultra, £2005 mobile
Our missed penalty, by, of all people, Harry Kane, was a heart-breaker.
! I was feeling so slow-witted and tired suddenly. Everything is normal then!
Light-headed. heavy eye-lidded, and with a new (to me) style of viewpoint, I shall call it ‘Soddumall Sunday’, I pressed on with getting the Health Checks sorted… No wee-wee! No call to the Porcelain Throne, no Dizzy Dennis when I stood up from the computer; I’d been on for about six hours, none-stop… and; I genuinely felt I just wasn’t going to get all hot and bothered about anything! 
figures had come down.
I poddled out into the balcony and was greeted by the wind and 
and 
that was the cause of this. As the day progressed, I saw more and more areas of the carpet mainly, that looked like they had water running along them. Looked in the wet room, junk room and kitchen without any success. So I gave up. 
Into the kitchen to make another brew of tea, Thompson’s Punjana, this time. 
Cutting this short now. Just got to get some sleep; not feeling well at all.
The potatoes looked and tasted okay.
the scab off of the finger. put a plaster on.
looked okay. Been a grind getting it done today, but felt a smidge smug about my struggles and efforts.
ridden!
Yet another sleepless night for the old man! Men’s Day UK as well! If any 
blog, and I decided to make a mug of Glengettie tea and dunk some of the Biscoff caramelised biscuits. Take a break, you know?
Pete shook the right arm.
Bouncing against the bottom of the cupboard, and broke into several pieces.
started! 
kicked in. I just had to get up and check that I’d not left any taps running or puddles of tea to slip over…
. Did you see that? The Thought Storms are coming from my fingers now as I type!
Hi-Ho, it’s off to the wet room I go, then…
off… it was too late by then, but I went and got a picker upperer to use. Which separated the paired socks, and then I had to sort them back into sets and get them back in the cubby hole. 
Got the saving started; I used the four-bladed razors, thinking it would be quicker.
solved the issue! 
The leg’s DVT spider and saphenous vein look rather artistic this morning. They were bulging or swollen with it today, though
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. I’d still have to get the PP’s and trousers on; getting them on is not exactly a walk in the park nowadays.
I’ve not done the Health checks yet. So, I will!
Virulent? I’ll check to see if that’s the right word.
08:30hrs: 
Burst forth in tune. And Carer Chirpy Charley bounced into the room. In a rush, she was late.
For some reason, possibly induced and prompted by 
Well, would you believe it?
Warmed two part-baked bread rolls in the oven, and I cooked a microwave oven- ready-meal in the microwave. No problems with the timing, and they were both ready at the same time (9-minutes).
dropped Metal Micky, it was 
My musing moved on to the Hospital appointments and the genuine fear of the Cataract operation, and the first Memory and Mentally-Affected assessments at the Nuthall Hospital will arrive on the same day. what are the odds of that? Not as high as you would think, knowing my luck.
As I started to get deep into the quagmire of self-pity and self-hating, the 
started off i
n both lower legs. That really didn’t help at all. I massaged, and Phorpain gelled the legs, giving it plenty of energy and a good massaging.
gets as nasty with me again.