Inchcock Today – Thursday 14th Decmber 2017:

Thursday 14th December 2017

Turkish: Perşembe 14 2017

0130hrs: I stirred, pandiculated gently, added to the several pages of notes the pad, that, I assumed I had done overnight about the Whoopsiedangleplops yesterday, and the dream I’d had last night.

Off to the Porcelain Throne. All wind, no solids, not even any liquids evacuated. I did sit there a while pondering on the events of yesterday, doing my damndest to recollect something of the blank spots, without any luck. I got the shpilkes when I realised just how much I could not remember.

I recognised that getting the Wednesday the 13th Inchcock Today updated would entail a lot of difficulties. So I did the Health Checks and took the medications, made a brew and set about sorting it out.

The Sys and Dia are still a bit high. I assessed the physical attributes. Water retention in legs, bad ✘. Reflux Roger, A lot easier and gone down, not sticking at all ✔. Duodenal Donald, Playing up ✘. Hernia Harry, Good ✔.  Anne Gyna, Not too bad at all ✔. Hippy Hilda, bothersome ✘. Arthur Itis Knees, ✔, Hands ✔ Wrists ✘. Ankle Tendonitis, Okay ✔. A toothache, Not too bad ✔. Metal Ticker, No problems ✔. Haemorrhoid Harold, Bleeding ✘. Constipation Conrad, Okay ✔. Dizzy Dennis, Only one spell up to now ✔. Prostate Percy, leaking ✘. Boils, Still there but not painful? ✔, Trotsky Terence, Good ✔, and Crampy Craig, Okay  ✔ So, let’s add these up, (Where’s my abacus? Hehe!)

Goods ✔= 14 – Bads ✘= 7. I’m content, pleased-as-punch and tickled pink with that. Fank you!

I’ll have to think up a name for the Blank Spells when everything seems to go vague, and memories disappear, although thank heavens this is not very often, it has happened more this year than ever before. Blank Bob? Vague Vernon?  Maybe, Obscure Oscar? Suggestions welcome.

Many wee-wees throughout today.

On with sorting the diary out again, then another summoning from the innards to the Porcelain Throne! And what a session that was. Trotsky Terence seems to have been replaced with Constipation Conrad; Who minutes ago I gave an ‘Okay’ rating. Hehehe! Still, it gave me a chance to catch up on the Lenigrad book.

I don’t know that the pillock living above is up to, but he ain’t half banging away, sounds like he’s dragging and then slamming things?

Finally got the 13ths Inchcock Today completed and posted off.

MAde a start on this one. Good heavens, it’s 0800hrs already!

I wish I were confident about what is going on about the upgrade. I know I’ve to stay in until something happens today and all day tomorrow. If the builders come early enough in the morning, I can go see Brother-in-law Pete skating in the slab square.

Got up to make another brew and had a Dizzy Dennis. Whatever was wrong with me yesterday afternoon, has apparently not finished with me yet. I’ll best not go to the Social Hour today. That’s two weeks I’ve missed now. Humph!

Caught up to here on the blog, then did some WordPress reading and comments.

On to Facebook.

Did a bit of work on CorelDraw for the TFZer series. Then did the ablutions.

Finally, four hours later, I got the TFZer graphics done. I’m going to make a post with them all on. Here are a few of them.

Got the nosh prepared.

I’d overcooked the beef slices and potatoes. Used the balsamic glaze on them both. The beetroots were a little hard, the tomatoes were bitter, but the lemon mousse and clementine juice were okay.

I did the Health Checks and off to the Porcelain Throne – Constipation Conrad had now got a grip, and it was not easy. On the bright side, the Lenigrad book will soon be finished at this rate. Still unsure whether to risk taking Senna?

I felt weary again and got one of the Seagal films out of the box and into the DVD player. I was so pleased that it had subtitles… until I found out it was only Norwegian subtitles! Tsk!

Settled in the recliner, tray and dirty plate and cutlery on the chair next to it, I proceeded to fall-asleep and wake-up repeatedly for hours.

By Inchie

73 years of age, pretty ugly, short, bald, pot-bellied, in ill health. Decaying physically and morally. Metal ticker, Duodenal Donald, Saccades-Sandra, Arthur Rheumatoid Itis, Hernia Henry, Hard of Hearing Hank, Bad eyesight Boris, Reflux Roger, Peripheral Neuropathy, Nerve Neurotransmitters Not-working Wendy, Bladder Cancer Chris, Stuttering Sandra, Haemorrhoid Harold, Shaking Shaun, Dizzy Dennis... there are others, but I've tired myself out, now! Hehehe! Oh, then I had a stroke! Failures, Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops are my Forte... Hehehe! I love making folk smile when I can. TTFNski!

10 comments

  1. Trying to understand your blog better. You don’t seem depressed at all, yet you tag depression. You make brilliant, satirical graphics, yet spend a great deal of time constipated. You began funny, now you’re depressing me. Is this what you want in the end? Is this the secret of your craft? I’ve been reading your blog now for about a week. I got six days of amusement and now day seven I feel depressed. Is this your ultimate art? I hope so, otherwise I either need to follow your blog and feel depressed, feeling guilty about it because you are running a blog, which we usually see as positive and you are baring your soul and doing everything medically wrong. On the other hand, this could be a nasty grandchild with some intellect, imitating old people with medical problems who is familiar with Tesco and hears granddad blather on about pork knuckles. Overall, your blog depresses me while I laugh and imagine myself shopping properly and eating crap.

    1. Inchie – Nottingham. UK. – 73 years of age, pretty ugly, short, bald, pot-bellied, in ill health. Decaying physically and morally. Metal ticker, Duodenal Donald, Saccades-Sandra, Arthur Rheumatoid Itis, Hernia Henry, Hard of Hearing Hank, Bad eyesight Boris, Reflux Roger, Peripheral Neuropathy, Nerve Neurotransmitters Not-working Wendy, Bladder Cancer Chris, Stuttering Sandra, Haemorrhoid Harold, Shaking Shaun, Dizzy Dennis... there are others, but I've tired myself out, now! Hehehe! Oh, then I had a stroke! Now awaiting Cataract & Glaucoma operations. Tsk! Failures, Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops are my Forte... Hehehe! I love making folk smile when I can. TTFNski!
      Inchcock says:

      Sorry about that.

      1. Don’t be sorry! I mean this in a positive way. Your blog has an impact on me, so I think you’re reaching your audience in some mixed and fascinating ways. You’ve also, by the way, caused me to reflect on my own health and what it means to me. So, keep up with the writing and telling us about your day-to-day.

      2. Inchie – Nottingham. UK. – 73 years of age, pretty ugly, short, bald, pot-bellied, in ill health. Decaying physically and morally. Metal ticker, Duodenal Donald, Saccades-Sandra, Arthur Rheumatoid Itis, Hernia Henry, Hard of Hearing Hank, Bad eyesight Boris, Reflux Roger, Peripheral Neuropathy, Nerve Neurotransmitters Not-working Wendy, Bladder Cancer Chris, Stuttering Sandra, Haemorrhoid Harold, Shaking Shaun, Dizzy Dennis... there are others, but I've tired myself out, now! Hehehe! Oh, then I had a stroke! Now awaiting Cataract & Glaucoma operations. Tsk! Failures, Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops are my Forte... Hehehe! I love making folk smile when I can. TTFNski!
        Inchcock says:

        Cheers.

    1. Inchie – Nottingham. UK. – 73 years of age, pretty ugly, short, bald, pot-bellied, in ill health. Decaying physically and morally. Metal ticker, Duodenal Donald, Saccades-Sandra, Arthur Rheumatoid Itis, Hernia Henry, Hard of Hearing Hank, Bad eyesight Boris, Reflux Roger, Peripheral Neuropathy, Nerve Neurotransmitters Not-working Wendy, Bladder Cancer Chris, Stuttering Sandra, Haemorrhoid Harold, Shaking Shaun, Dizzy Dennis... there are others, but I've tired myself out, now! Hehehe! Oh, then I had a stroke! Now awaiting Cataract & Glaucoma operations. Tsk! Failures, Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops are my Forte... Hehehe! I love making folk smile when I can. TTFNski!
      Inchcock says:

      Hehe!
      You might be right, mate.

  2. Timothy Price – I specialize in daily art, documentary and promotional photography. If you have a special event such as a musical production, play, concert, etc. or have a product or fashion that you need photographed, or you are a performer, musician and artist in need of promotional photos please email me or call.
    Timothy Price says:

    Really love the fiery first graphic. I think I’ve said it before, but you have a really nice Monty Pythonesqueness to your photographicalizations. I totally understand your depression and how it manifests itself in making people laugh. Depression often goes with artistic genius. You put both to excellent use. Food is well arranged and looks great no matter its short comings.

    1. Inchie – Nottingham. UK. – 73 years of age, pretty ugly, short, bald, pot-bellied, in ill health. Decaying physically and morally. Metal ticker, Duodenal Donald, Saccades-Sandra, Arthur Rheumatoid Itis, Hernia Henry, Hard of Hearing Hank, Bad eyesight Boris, Reflux Roger, Peripheral Neuropathy, Nerve Neurotransmitters Not-working Wendy, Bladder Cancer Chris, Stuttering Sandra, Haemorrhoid Harold, Shaking Shaun, Dizzy Dennis... there are others, but I've tired myself out, now! Hehehe! Oh, then I had a stroke! Now awaiting Cataract & Glaucoma operations. Tsk! Failures, Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops are my Forte... Hehehe! I love making folk smile when I can. TTFNski!
      Inchcock says:

      Thanks again Tim.
      Not coping so well this morning. The unsure thoughts about waht was arranged with the builders means I’ll stay in all day and hope they come early, so I can get outto see Pete.
      Taking no chance with the nosh tonight, I’ll be having a Pork Knuckle. Hehe!
      TTFNski

    1. Inchie – Nottingham. UK. – 73 years of age, pretty ugly, short, bald, pot-bellied, in ill health. Decaying physically and morally. Metal ticker, Duodenal Donald, Saccades-Sandra, Arthur Rheumatoid Itis, Hernia Henry, Hard of Hearing Hank, Bad eyesight Boris, Reflux Roger, Peripheral Neuropathy, Nerve Neurotransmitters Not-working Wendy, Bladder Cancer Chris, Stuttering Sandra, Haemorrhoid Harold, Shaking Shaun, Dizzy Dennis... there are others, but I've tired myself out, now! Hehehe! Oh, then I had a stroke! Now awaiting Cataract & Glaucoma operations. Tsk! Failures, Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops are my Forte... Hehehe! I love making folk smile when I can. TTFNski!
      Inchcock says:

      I fank You Sir. Take care.

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