Month: September 2022

Inchcock: Monday 19th September 2022

/ Inchie / 2 Comments

POLITICAL CARTOON
♥ A THANK YOU TO THE NHS STAFF ♥
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GC sleepAInchcock woke up this morning at 04:25hrs. No change to usual, he wanted, well needed, a weewee! And as usual, by the time he’d struggled with his balance exercises, he also needed to utilise the Porcelain Throne. He seemed all calm compared to how he was during last night’s series of Accifauxpas. He made his way, on his painful right knee, to the wet room, still half asleep. He woke up a little more as he entered through the door:  Inchie walked into the door frame that had protesting violently, ensuring he was soon wide awake. He swore a little, gritted his teeth, and nearly spat in disgust at himself and Cataract Katie. Oh, that was in second-person style?

At least the evacuation was a lot easier and mushier, which I expected after taking the Galpharm by mistake for Co-Codamol last night. No bleeding or mess needed to be cleaned up. It took me a while to stop the shaving cuts from bleeding.
And I decided to get the ablutions done while I was in the wet room. Did you see that? I made a decision!
Then got some Phorpain rubbed into , and of course , no painkillers, cause with the problems these last few days, I’ve taken a few extras, and that is not good.
After all, me being a famously handsome, sought after by women, brave, heroic sort of super-stud and intellectual, it would look bad if I couldn’t take a bit of pain.

I came out of the wet room without any further injuries and made a mug of Thompson’s Signature Blend tea.
The sky’s colouration was so different this morning. Yesterday’s deep blues had been replaced with an odd mix of browns and blacks. Still beautiful all the same. Ah, Mother Nature! Now, take note if you please; It was approx’ 06:00hrs when I used the camera to take this delightful morning view.

I did the sphygmomanometerisationing and luckily: very luckily, wrote down the figures to go on the excel record.
And got the computer on to update and copy the graph, as shown here. Then put the figures onto the NHS DVT blood pressure assessment page on the web.

I was back up to the Hypertension 3 again! I did note that it was last Monday, the last time it was so high. I’m not sure if that means anything connected to my dislike of Sundays?
I then realised I had forgotten to take a photo of the monitor and body temperature thermometer. Which, in turn, got me thinking, where is the camera anyway? Ah… in the kitchen, of course, that’s where I took the photo of the morning’s view… obvious, innit? But, No!
I poddled into the kitchenette to get it. After about 15 minutes of failed searching, I was baffled, to say the least.
Dementia Doreen filtered the thought into my brain: “Did you drop the camera when closing the window?
Oh dearie me, surely not? This was enough to reinstate my Sherlockian investigations. But, still no success.
So, the Hallway next. Nope! The junk room. Nope! The airing cupboard? Nope! Well, the dang thing must be somewhere! Hopefully, not 12 storeys down smashed on the pavement!
Back into the computer room, another time-costing ferret around. But nope. if it was there, I could not find it.
So, as of 17:00hrs, as is now, when I finally got around to doing this blog – the Lumix camera’s location remains a mystery. Hence my often used phrase: Such are the mysteries of Woodthorpe Court, with the ghosts, wraiths, spectres, cacodemons, apparitions, and other grotesqueries that haunt the hallways and lobbies, searching for Inchcock; to curse with bad luck, create ambiguities, abstrucities, perplexities, misfortunes and botherations, to scare. worry, scare and confuse me!.
So, no photographs taken… apart from the morning skies one.

I was not feeling too good now and could have done without Herberts banging away. Still, it didn’t last for so long this time.

I got a call on the mobile and was impressed by the clarity of the new ring tone I’d chosen… But, could I find the mobile? Nope! Now my sanity was being questioned – worryingly by me!
Sherlockian Mode adopted again, and I searched for the mobile; it had to be in this room, or I’d never have heard it. That helped, not having to search the whole flat again.
Finding, after a lengthy hunt around, that it was in the coat hanging on the back of the chair I was sitting in at the computer created a smidgeon of ‘Feeling-Stupid’ in me. It was from Jenny, so I rang her back.
She asked if I would like some tomatoes, I thanked her, and she said she’d bring them up later and drop them at the door after ringing the bell. ♥

I’ve come across a single word on one line in the scribble memory pad; it say’s ‘Paper’? I wish I knew what it meant. Tsk!

Jane and Pete posing for me – 2018

Sister Jane called on the landline to see if I was watching the Queen’s funeral. I ended up feeling so guilty when I said no. Two sentences from her stern voice, and I put the TV on to ease my guilt! Hehehe! We had a nice chinwag for a while, but she got a call from hubby Pete, and she rang off.
Being as I’ve not taken any photos for hours and hours, mainly because I can’t without a camera – here is a photo I took earlier of Jane & Pete’s visit, behind the flats. August 2018, I believe.

At long last, I got the Sunday blog updated and as I was saving it ready to do a final grammar check. I got the shakes from i.e., , which are far more damaging than Shaking Shaun, cause they last so much longer each time, particularly when on the computer, as was the case here.
The hand shot the mousse all over the screen. I had no idea what buttons I’d hit, but the whole blog disappeared. No longer in Post listings! I don’t know how I managed to avoid bursting into tears; it was a close thing, though. After trying various things and confirming it was not in the unpublished or published lists, my heart sank. All those lost hours, gone like a puff of smoke! I was out of ideas; surely, if I’d deleted it, WordPress would have asked me for confirmation? I turned off the computer, no longer interested; I was in despair, grief and misery.

Walked into the doorframe, cuts shaving, the camera lost, and now, the blog lost.
As I felt myself sinking into a Dracula Depression, from somewhere deep within, I thought – hang-on mush, did you catch the delete button? So, without much hope, I got the computer back on and checked – There it was in the deleted file! I do believe I gave out a Whoop! Cause started his banging away, he must have heard me?

Thinking what a genius I am, I published the blog hastily and copied the web address to send by email to my multitude of followers, oh, yes, both of them! But: The address came up with ‘3-trashed’ in the title?
I remembered to restore the deleted post, but am not sure if it got through? No likes of messages have come through on it? Depression falls again!

The Evening Carer is due anytime now; I’ll get something to eat then.
Jodie rang and entered. The first thing she said was, “Oh, you’re topless!” I covered my man breasts with my hands, laughed and said, “Oh, sorry!” I put a jacket on straight away. Jodie did the medications, and we had a minute or two of nattering and laughing. I gave her Shepherd’s Pie meal that I forgot to give to Josie, and she seemed pleased with that. She took the waste bag with her on the way out. I locked the door, and I went into the wet room for a quick wash and do the .
: I found the Lumix Camera!!! It was in with the PPs in the bag… How and why I should put it there in the first place; will have to remain a secret with Dementia Doreen forever!

Boy, I was tickled-pink at finding it! Following making a meal, which I rated for Taste-Rating at 6/10. Mushrooms with a drop of liquid smoke and vinegar added while cooking (not bad!), veggie sausages (tasty!), sliced tomatoes (tangy), and some of the terribly tasteless McCain crinkle-cut microwave chips. (I’ll use up what I have left but not get these again). A pot of Del Monte mandarins in orange jelly, it was so bitter, irony-flavoured, my first and last time I try these as well.

.Washed the pots, and for the rest of the night, I kept nipping out to the kitchen to take shots of the sun setting, and I was relatively pleased with some of the shots.

My body and mind told me to get to sleep, and Sweet Morpheus refused the request! But this time, it didn’t matter so much; Being overjoyed but felt stupid for losing it and over the moon at finding the Lumix. I couldn’t stop myself from repeatedly getting up and taking the changing photos of the evening view from the kitchenette window.
Rather, unfortunately, I’d gone into a smug mode over finding the Lumix and taking a few decent shots with it. After taking the last picture, I got a , against the cabinet door corner as I moved away from the window.
Naturally, I just light-heartedly laughed it off… No, no swearing, cursing, spitting, moaning, self-disgust, or growling under my breath.

I spent far too long fling the flat checks tonight. Many things had to be checked several times to convince myself that they were done right; Both sink taps were well checked, numerically. And the oven not being left on checks were done twice. Tsk!

But, Sweet Morpheus denied my dropping off to sleep. Then the Thought Storms arrived, and they were so bad this time. But, a sort of salvation saved me from the anguish, worries and fears: Colin cramps attacked, and this took away my concerns over the Thought Storms – and replaced them with agony! Both hands, left-hand fingers, and the left leg took the brunt of his onslaught. It’s still sore now, nine hours later. The right knee feels a bit delicate too. Haha!

Huh! Who needs sleep?

Sunday 18th September 2022

/ Inchie / Leave a comment

POLITICAL CARTOON OF THE DAY
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Sad, it really is. Hehehe!


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These sunsetting photos were missed from yesterday’s blog. Naturally, this was the combined faults of Dementia Doreen and Cataract Katie. Also, as well as, and besides them; Anne Gyna for giving me grief as I was checking the blog on completion, and Sock Glide Gladys for moving from where I left her after using her in the morning, behind the trolley, so that I stubbed my toe against her sold metal constructed frame. Life’s a game!

Gorgeous!
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Hayley Mills

CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? Hehehe!

I woke around midnight, in urgent need of a weewee. Which was another visit that turned into the visit. After this and a couple of others, there was no chance of more sleep for me.
So, I got, for the first time in my life, a can of Pepsi Cola to drink, And I can now state that I liked Pepsi better than Coke. Haha! Haha! If Pepsi Co. would like a written commendation, my fees will not be excessive.
I spent four hours getting the Saturday blog updated and sent off, unbroken, even for a weewee or mug of tea.

Did you ask how the hell can the old pillock take so long? Easy-peasy! I struggled with my eyesight and made many mistakes, some that Grammarly missed; these amendments cost me a lot of time. When I finally (I thought) got it ready for the final run-through, read and check. I found many of the amendments I’d made to be wrong as well. It was as if someone else was in charge of my fingers? I got fed up with finding faults and sent it off as it was… frustrated and annoyed at myself.

I took a break to make the first brew of the morning, Thompson’s Punjana. While making it, I checked that everything was in the fridge for making Josie’s Sunday lunch. It’s getting harder now to cut up the small vegetables so Josie can cope with them, but I do get something out of doing it for her… satisfaction and almost pride!

I decided to prep the veg then and there. I got mushrooms, potatoes, carrots and gungo beans ready and in the pan. Sliced some yellow peppers and tomatoes up small. The green beans, I’ll cut later; they will be overdone if they go in too early.
A can of mixed vegetables, liquid salt, vegan Oxo, BBQ, and basil seasonings. Stirring all the time to start with. After half an hour, I left them to settle and marinate and added the no-bacon-bacon bits. A little short on potatoes this week; I hope she doesn’t notice cause she’ll tell me if she does. Cubing them can be risky.
I was cooking the mushrooms separately. There is a design as to why. Sometimes the gravy can dry up, so I leave the vegetable seasoned water from cooking the mushrooms in the pan, then I can use it later as a tasty addition to the stew, come chilli, to loosen the food for her.
I returned to the computer for a while and started on the Ode and graphic making on CorelDraw.

Back to check on the fodder… As I anticipated, the stew was getting a little too thick for Josie’s tastes, so I went to get the saucepan with the mushroom water… Twas then that I realised I had turned on the wrong hob! The back of the right-hand middle finger coped for it, but that is better than the left. The nerve ends on the Peripheral Neuropathy side, and I hardly felt any pain. Of course, once the eyes saw it, the pain instantly developed; Haha!
I poured some of the mushroom juice into the saucepan and gave it a good stir!
Then went to put some Germolene cream on the finger. The right knee was really giving me so jip now as well.

I returned to the kitchen, added the sliced earlier green beans to the mix, and stirred again.

Had a taste of it and felt it was just about right for Josie’s taste buds to be tickled.

Back to the CorelDraw tasks, and got the Ode written and graphics for the blog. This was a mammoth undertaking with all the errors I was making.

♫ Oh, Susana ♫ rang out from the door chime. Blimey, I’d forgotten all about the Carer not calling! It was about 08:00hrs. Weekend again, so nothing unusual. Jozeph came in, and we had a natter after he’d done the medications. Not for too long, he had another call to make. Offered him a treat of his choice and asked him to take the waste bag with him, which he did.

Now I got serious about CorelDrawing.

Did the health checks and made up this graph with a photo of the thermometer, sphygmomanometerisationing, and all the results.

I half expected the blood pressure to fall today; cause it’s been excessively high for a few days now.

However, even though I didn’t anticipate it being as low as it was, I was so nearly in the red Zone for the first time ever! , Ahem!

I have no views or ideas of what the readings will reveal or what it will be like tomorrow. A wild guess? Erm… nothing coming through to me from my EQ… stab in the dark, mayhap…
SYS 138, DIA 64, Pulse, that will still be high methinks, 92bpm? Body temperature… er… 32.4¸f,
And overall, mayhaps, just in the Pre-High bracket?
It will be interesting to see now that I’ve had a guess. Of course, it could go up further, and I’ll kick the bucket; that would ruin the guessing game. I wonder if Billum at Manor Labs will have a guess? A clever bloke is that lad.

Oh… Josie’s nosh… back in a bit…

I only just made it in time for the allotted 12:00hrs delivery of the meal for Josie. I hurried that much; I forgot all about taking a photo of it, mind you, had I grabbed one, the delivery would have been late for the first time ever… well, over the last three or four years.

Back in the flat after being told off for giving her too big a nosh, that would make her like Betty Bunter. Hahaha! And made a brew of Glengettie tea.

I made a Morrison order. Initially, to get some of their roasted vegetable ready meals (No one else sells them), the best-prepared meal I’ve ever bought – Bootiful! Coming next Wednesday twixt 8-9:00hrs. Sister Jane would like these methinks.

Went on the WordPress Reader, and WP let me in today.

Food time now; I’ll go and see what’s available. Not a lot.
The ‘slimmers’ chips certainly look tatty and have thick skins on every one of the chips. Yet they still tasted so nice – different to any other chips. A significant variance in size too. From 4 inches to ¼ inch in length. Taste Rating: 6.2/10.

Of course, having these chips is all a part of my ‘Get Inchies Belly Slimmer campaign’. I’m determined and have a new tenacity to get lighter! Nothing is going to stop me.

I made an order from Morrisons. I didn’t realise that I had made it for the same day as the Sainsbury one!
I got on the computer to change it, but no other day was available. So I managed to get it for later in the day, so they should not arrive at the same time. In’t it a struggle to change an order’s delivery time?

Went to the kitchenette to find I’d left the oven on and the hot tap running! I hate Dementia Doreen!

I turned the oven off and tap… too late for the faucet; the water was stone cold! I’ll have to do the ablutions in the morning. Turned to grab Metal Micky, and somehow I missed him altogether! Not really surprising; the cataracted eyes get a lot worse as I grow more tired. Then, as I bent down to retrieve the walking stick, I got a visit from Dizzy Dennis. I went down on one knee… Thud!

 

I went to the wet room, and  I put some of the Phorpain Gel on the knee. But it has little effect.
So I grabbed a packet of Co-codamol and took one. ‘That should ease things, I thought to myself.
Ha! What a twit!
I realised I’d not taken a Co-codamol, but a Galpharm capsule! Now, these are effective medications! But for blocking up the torpedo’s escape route! I’m not looking forward to my next visit to the !

Finally, I did manage to take a Co-codamol. After checking the taps, I got Metal-Micky and left the wet room…
CLUNK! I felt a depression with a trickling of self-pity coming on. Hehe! Walked straight into the doorframe!
Back in the wet room, Phorpained the shoulder, as an irritable, annoyed was getting revenge on me for clouting her again.

And feeling a little down, I sat myself down in the £300, used, bought eight years ago from the second-hand shop, Harold Haemorrhoid testing, repugnantly beige-coloured, crumb containing, virus-breeding, acne-giving, rickety, none-working recliner, and the Thought Storms began.
I decided it has to be the tiredness and Cataract deterioration causing many of these evenings, Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops. I can do nothing about this situation and try to be patient while waiting for the cornea operation. Here is the farce so far… The First appointment:

How things developed:

â‘  When the optician told me I had cataracts in both eyes, she informed the Doctor that I would need to have the situation appraised at the EENT department. The Doctor will arrange this for you.
â‘¡ Eight months later, I got an appointment for the first assessment. Which was for three months later!
â‘¢ They kindly put a lift for me to the meeting. On going in with the driver, he was walking so fast, I lost him! Eventually, I found the wrong reception, and the patients waiting helped me find out where I should be with the receptionist with a squeaky voice that I could not hear.
â‘£ I assent to two other locations and had tests of different natures in each one. Then told to go to the reception and book a lift for the following assessment.
⑤ Could I find the proper reception? No! But, a nurse helped me as she passed, and I found it. The following evaluation was for 2 months. The receptionist pointed her finger at the corner of the large waiting room, where I should wait to be collected from.
â‘¥ I sat down, and within 2 hours, the lift home ambulance arrived.

THE SECOND ASSESSMENT
â‘  On this trip, they dropped me outside the EENT, and I proudly made my way to the reception needed.
â‘¡ Two completely different examinations in two separate rooms, the lady in the first was pleasant and liked a laugh between the machines I was put on. â‘¢ Then she escorted me to the subsequent office/surgery that was a way off the first. â‘£ The Doctor in this one did everything silently, forcing himself to speak when he had to.
⑤   I found the proper reception all on my own, and this time, had to wait three hours for a lift home/

THE THIRD ASSESSMENT

① Arrived at the EENT, and the driver kindly escorted me through at a nice slow pace to the reception  From where I was sent to yet another different waiting area  No reception in that one.
â‘¡ Only a couple of minutes later, I was fetched into a cramped little office with various weird-looking (to me) optical machines in it.
③ The lady explained that if this test finds things to be out-of-shape, then the operation will not be able to go ahead, and she did the in-depth examination, which took about an hour  A smile came over her face when she declared that things as far as this test was concerned are okay for the op  She wished me good luck.
â‘£ Told me to return to where I was sat when she collected me, and someone will fetch me for the final checking with the optometrist, who will make the final decision on recommending me to an ophthalmologist for surgery. If it is safe enough, Bless her!
⑤ Ah, this was obviously a decision-making lady. No humour, serious throughout. Knew her job, and seemed good at it as far as I could appreciate
⑥ She had an assistant, a young Asian lad, who did some more tests on a different machine. Testing the reactions of the eye to bouncing colours this one. 
⑦ The two of them discussed the findings for ten or fifteen minutes; I could not hear what was said, of course. The lady seemed to be teaching the young man and declared he should do the test again.
⑧ Back to the machine at the man’s desk. I sensed a little tension in the lad, so I gave him a smile and got one back in return, and he seemed to cheer up a smidgeon. As the test was completed, he showed his crossed fingers, which I took as a hopeful sign.
⑧ He sent the details of this test via his computer to the lady’s monitor, and I waited whilst they discussed the new test results.
⑨ Fifteen minutes later, she turned to me and told me that I had a deformed cornea, which was going to be challenging to reproduce in plastic, but she was willing to try, as the chances of success were within official limits. That’s all, she added…
I thanked her and the gentleman and made my way to the first reception to ask for a lift. I got lost en route, but I recovered when advised by someone I asked for guidance.
The wait for the lift home was only about an hour, but the tests had taken so much longer this visit. When I got home, it was turning dark.

Blimey, I waffled on there, sorry!

Saturday Diary & Ode: 17th September 2022

/ Inchie / 8 Comments

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To my cyber-buddy and fellow none-fitter-innerer Billumski!
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I think I had more sleep last night than I have in any week! Sadly, it was all in bits and pieces, broken by being woken and my habit of straying off doing things after I’d needed one of the several wee-wees. Also, some persistent Thought-Storms of an aggressive nature.

But I returned to the doubtful comfort of the £300, bought eight years ago from the second-hand shop, Harold Haemorrhoid testing, repugnantly beige-coloured, crumb containing, virus-breeding, acne-giving, rickety, none-working recliner; after each hobble about, or moving things around for no reason, and rearranging of a food cupboard. Why? I anticipate finding other things that I may well have done in my noctambulations later on.

I lay there, pondering over this and that, and anything and the bowels decided to try and evacuate the inner product of its own accord… There followed a sequence of events that were events that were worthy of the Comedy Sketch of a Year Award. I thank heavens there are no CCTV cameras in this flat!

①: I fumbled and bumbled my way up onto my feet; crumbs, the TV remote and a part-eaten packet of pistachio nuts hit the floor and spread all over the carpet... 
â‘¡: No time for the waking-up to catch my balance routine, I grabbed Metal-Micky, and on the first imitation step, I found one of the pistachio nuts with my left foot.
â‘¢: So, as I crumpled onto the floor, my right knee found another escaped Pistachio nut!
â‘£: I went through some pain getting up again, and was only concerned at that moment with getting to the in time… The narrow hallway walls sustain me getting into the wet room, for Metal Micky was laying somewhere in the front room wherever it was, I’d dropped him in the tumble.
⑤: The fight to get the pyjamas down delayed me and caused more panic; I tore them, in the end, to get them down quicker…
â‘¥: To no avail, I fear! The bladder and bowels won this one! They both started before my bum got down on the plastic .
⑦: At least things were over quickly, but they left me with I don’t know how long to put right and clean up the wet room, then the exit points had to be cleaned and medicated. Fortunately, I keep a supply of the PPs and large kitchen towels with the Germolene and Germolids to hand in the wet room. Along with the aftershave and plasters to steady any shaving cuts or leaks from Little Inchies Fungal Lesion while I’m doing the ablutions.

I can’t understand why now; no doubt it made sense at the time, but I felt a little smug at coping with these embarrassments and decided to get the done while I was in there.
The right knee was not in good shape after its attack on the Pistachio nut earlier. Hehe! in shaving, left me using the plasters and the aftershave to stop the bleeding! Little Inchies Lesion was not leaking; all were okay!   Oh, and the hair at the lower back of the head come neck is definitely growing again – white! I shaved it off.
After getting things all sorted, new PPs and socks (that were a hell of a job to get them on!) on, The right knee was now very tender!  I packed the affected PPs in the disposal bag and returned to get Metal Micky from the recliner room…
When I got back in the room, I thought I’d had burglars! I’d cleared the shelf above the electric fire of all the rubbish, and that had joined the crumbs and food on the carpet! Making it worse, a bottle of disinfectant I keep there for the wee-wee bucket had lost its cap when it got knocked over!
I’d also like to know how I managed to get Metal Micky left right in the corner her the bookcase? I think it would a physical impossibility, surely? Anyway, it was hard enough trying to retrieve it; I had to climb over the many fallen object to get to it – so I used the long picker-upperer. Cunning that, I thought!
I got Micky back with the stick and was almost on the verge of congratulating myself as I turned around and against the shredder. Another flipping moment!

I stopped doing everything. And mountaineered my way to the recliner, resisting crying, and just sat down and spoke to myself as calmly as I could… “This is not a good start. Fair enough, the bladder and bowels are out of your control, as are your fingers, feet, legs, shoulder etc… no good getting depressed, mate; it’s just how it is. What you need is some help when things like this happen. I agreed with myself, called myself a pratt, and did my belated balance exercise.
At this point, I noticed the clock… that was on the floor with all the other jetsam and flotsam – I checked with my watch, and they both indicated it was only 04:30hrs! Christ, what time did I get up then?

I swore to take things calmly from here on today. And tackled the mammoth job of cleaning and sorting things out in the room. I’m not saying I didn’t have a few moments of self-pity cause I did feel sorry for myself once or twice. But found the determination to just press on with the sorting. No rushing, doing it quietly. I got something out of it at the end of the task, I’d got three waste bags full of rubbish to go to the chute. Hahaha! Somehow or other, I perked up a smidgeon, too! It was well gone eight O’clock by the time I’d sorted the mess. Then I made a prayer for it not to happen again for a while, please.

It then dawned on me… the Morning Carer had not been yet? Quick as a flash, I realised it was a Saturday, so no fretting. Meridian was very late arriving last Saturday as well. They do have trouble getting staff at the weekend, it seems. Moments later, a call came in through the landline, and it was from Meridian.
The lady told me that the Carer was outside and could not get in. I took it as she was outside the building and told her to press the intercom 72 and I could let her in… then I thought I’d better check, and I inquired if she was outside the door or the flats? But the lady did not know. I said I’d get my walking stick and go have a look. Got the Wooden Wilmer stick, and I went to the door.
The Carer was outside of the flat door, complaining because she could not get the key lock code to work. I smiled gently, using one of my calming half-smiles, and told her I can’t either! And broke into a broad grin. That did it, I think; I caught her heart!   Hahaha! I explained that the door was not locked; sometimes, I forget to unlock it, but not often. If she presses this button, pointing out the door chime, I will hear it, but not anyone knocking on the door. I’m deaf, senile and decrepit, but that can’t be helped. She did larf! I liked her straight away.

Her name was Sinead, not seen before. I think she was from another assignment somewhere else; that’s why she was late, getting me added to her list. Nice gal, we had a little chinwag. She said she’d come again if she got the chance.

Well, I’ve still not done the Health Checks yet, better get them done. The last time I did them later in the day, the figures were down, so here’s hoping.

Well, that didn’t help much, doing it late, did it? Ah, well, as a part of my commitment to resist swearing, feeling sorry for myself and keeping calm, all I can say is: Hey-Ho!

Time to sort out something for dinner; no bother making up my mind today; I’ve a fancy for some chips and a veggie burger! The chips are oven ones that claim to be vegan. looking forward to trying them.
and Yet again, the photo I took of the meal has evaporated into the ether! I’d love to know how this happens; cause I took a look at it after shooting it and was pleased with the result. Come the morning, when I uploaded the last few photographs, there it was gone! Grrr!
The chips looked very tattie and were thick-skinned, but I did enjoy them all the same. Taste-Rating: 6.5/10.

Arrived, it was Sharon; I knew her name the second she told me after I asked her what it was! (Dementia Doreen again!) She didn’t stay long, but we managed a mini-natter before she chose her treats and departed.

Washed the pots, locked the door and a rinse, and made for the warmth of the rickety c1966 recliner. I feared that I may not be able to get back to sleep and put the telly on… but could I find anything worth watching? No!
I mused over which DVD to watch. Whilst doing so, I drifted off into Sweet Morpheus’ land… Nice!

Two hours later, I woke in desperate need of a wee-wee! The memories of this morning’s facial, embarrassing and painful events came flooding back.
Would I make it to the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket) in time without any more Accifauxpas? again, but I got things flowing without any disasters.
Stopping it flowing was the problem! The went on and on… I was almost tired out by the time it ended. Hehehe! I did have a mini during the leaking, but it only lasted for seconds – !

I felt the warm wet sensation when I pulled up the PPs. So, off I limped with Metal Micky to change the pants and clean up.
As I entered the wet room,
I stubbed my toe against the vicious, blood and bruise-bringing, metal, agony-to-use, brutal
!
I’m sure she had moved from this morning; I thought I’d put her safely out of the way behind the mop bucket… I’m sure I did! Now, she was near the sink? Obviously, the work of the mysteries of Winwood Heights, the ghosts, wraiths, spectres, cacodemons, apparitions and other grotesqueries haunt the hallways and lobbies, searching for Inchcock, to create ambiguities, abstrucities, perplexities, misfortunes and botherations, to scare. worry and confuse me! Or maybe .

That was the end of any thoughts of getting back to sleep again!

Friday 16th Sept: Farcical Diabetes Meeting Day

/ Inchie / 4 Comments

FRIDAY FUN CARTOON

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THE USUAL TODAY- REPEATEDLY!

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03:35hrs: I stirred, passed the wind and coughed a little. Found a couple of chips in the crumpled cushion as I exited the recliner. Between my legs was a kitchen towel roll, crushed?
I remembered the diabetes session and the need to get the blog done and posted before going out. So, without any delay, I got the computer going. But Mr Fries, the overpaid smoke & Mirrors boss, decided I wouldn’t! Down Again!

I got the Boot’s Sphygmomanometer, manufactured by, ZDEAC (Zhongshan Daguan Electrical Appliance Company Ltd) in Guangdong, China, and carried out the I used the Lumix cameras on Auto mode, to take this photo, not good is it?


As has been the blood pressure habit now for a week or more, up and down twixt the Red’s Hypo-1, 2, and 3, and suddenly back down into the amber zone; Today’s being on the border of the Hypertension 2 & 3.
This does not seem to bother my Doctor much at all. Nor me, for that matter; there’s no way of getting any helpful advice. I put the figures onto the Excel record. Someone just might be interested. I can hear and see them now: ‘Well, of course, I knew this would nobble him in the end. Still, he’d had enough, having Dementia, Cataract, and Depression… it’s a blessing in disguise. Where did you say he kept his money?
Hehehe! It’s essential to keep a sense of humour, innit?

Back on the computer, to see if ambidextrous Mr Fries, the money-cruncher and con-man, has worked out how to get the Virgin Media Internet back online – Oh, it’s working!
Well, done, Mr Fries; give yourself another $1 bonus.

I got the blog finished and sent it off to WordPress. A funny one about me and Alto-Inchy.

But of course, it went down again.

So I got the ablutionisationing done.
A few cuts shaving, but nothing serious. Then the came into use. Trotsky and Constipation Konrad were both about equally effective.

Carol, not seen her for a week or two. Lovely woman. Got the meds sorted and had a laugh and natter. ♥.

Got the things that needed to be checked ready for the Link bus to arrive. Got in a pickle with finding some of the stuff needed, Tsk! Down and outside with the trolley walker in good time. The driver took the payment from my pocket, and we were soon in Bulwell, in the Riverside car park. An unexpected scene presented itself… As the driver got me out of the minibus, I spotted the number of people queuing. along the back of the car park, up to the main road and around the corner!
I thought there might have been a fire alarm at first. There were people mustering the queuers who all had Nottingham City Council Badgers on. One of them came over to the driver and said something to him. He related, “You’ve got to join the queue to get in “. I joined the rank and file, behind what I estimated as 120 people! The driver drove off.
After 15-minutes and very little movement, I observed that an inordinately large percentage of the people were wearing face masks. Then it clicked, and I asked the man and woman in front of me, “Is this the Covid vaccination queue?” Yes, the lady said. The Nottingham City Council bouncer has assumed that is what I went there for. And sent me to join them. Naughty!
I walked into the centre, but I could not see any of the others on the course? Mind you, by now, it was well passed the starting time. So I went up in the lift, and I found some standing in the hallway. It seems some of them had had a text telling them the course will now start at 11:00 hrs, not 11:00hrs? While three of them had one telling them it will begin at the usual time?
Several of them said, Sod this, it’s farcical; I’m going home! As they approached the stairs to leave, the course man Nathanial arrived. I’m not sure if they all came back or not, but there seemed to be more space in the room compared to the last meeting.
As the meeting started, I stopped Nat to tell him, “I can’t hear what he’s saying, he’s too quiet, and when you do speak up, it’s too fast for me to catch”. I set the ball rolling there! Three others backed me up. Nathanial was amazed and thought we could all hear him. Then carried on in just the volume!

We all made a rush to escape when the meeting was over. I went down with Helen in the lift with our trolleys. Got outside, but the queue was still massive, nowhere to sit while waiting for the minibus. Helen’s taxi arrived, so then I had no one to talk to either. Hehe!

The bus arrived, and the non-communicative driver soon me back at the flats. Gave him a bottle of shandy in appreciation and hobbled up to the flat.

To find a letter delivered that looked official! Had a wee-wee, washed and investigate the correspondence. It was the Co-op Bank informing me of the balance of my savings account. It had gone up from last year… from £2.99, to £3.00. Ah, well!

I took a photo of the afternoon view.
Did some updating on this blog, and then the Fatigue-Fall fell on me?
I was of no use at all. My concentration collapsed, and my body and mind told me to get sat down and relax.
So I did!

within seconds of sitting down, and I slept unbrokenly for about four hours. To be rudely awoken to the chimes of ♫ Oh Susana ♫ blaring out.
Jozeph had arrived. I was only partially aware of what took place, but I feel we had a little natter. Memories of walking to the door with him to lock it and having to ask him to take the waste bag.

I thought I was going to stay up. So, the evening sky and sunsetting looked so beautiful; I thought I’d take some shots of it from the left to the right.

Mother Nature at her finest.

I then proceeded t get something to eat, but I didn’t feel up to making a full meal.
So, the microwave and kettle were used. A veggie burger on a cob and a pot of instant potato, bubble & squeak with cheese granules added.
I got down in the recliner to eat eat, making plans of updating this blog later, and even scribbled some notes to reaming me to go into it. I soon had it eaten, put the tray on the Carers table, while making plans of all the work I’d got to catch up on…
And drifted off until 03:35hrs in the morning! But it was a fitful sleep, full of jumping awakes, that it felt like were happening every five minutes!
Humph!

Diary Thursday 15th September 2022

/ Inchie / 2 Comments

TODAY’s POLITICAL CARTOON
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I didn’t get to sleep until around 03:00hrs. Hence, I was late getting up, well after 07:00hrs. As I pulled the quilt to reveal my legs, I’d got one leg deathly white and the other almost orange? The toes on both feet were looking bloodless!
By the time I’d had a wash and shave, Richard was coming in the door. His health looked poor, and he was coughing well in between the yawns. The poor lad! At least he had a few days off after visiting me, his last call. I got him a bottle of lime-flavoured tonic water; I thought the lemon might help with his throat a little. We had a decent natter, although he wanted to get home to bed. I gave Richard the stuff I’d had in the freezer for him for a few days but kept forgetting about it. Tsk!
I hope he can get some sleep. Druggies, yobboes and the water companies’ works are still outside of his home. I mentioned the carers not pressing the door chime when they come, as the two who came last night didn’t. Wished him well as he left.

Minutes later, I got a text from Iceland. Substitutes again. I checked the Email.

A sorry company nowadays Iceland are. Mind you, the others are not much better. At least the payment for short goods is made automatically with Iceland. J Sainsburys send you a code to use and a limited time span on it when making the next order. Of course, I forget to. CRAP!

Were carried out. Not a good one again.
As you can here on the right.
Having said that, there are some much worse ones earlier. The pulse was high, and the Chinese body temperature was a little lower again.


Another decent evacuation, I have to say. So I said it. Hehehe!

The Iceland man delivered goods. leaving them conveniently blocking the doorway. Good job; we didn’t have a fire alarm.

I struggled with the carriers through to the kitchenette and a start on sorting and storing them.
I’d only bought three frozen items, and I’m not sure that I meant to get the big bag of chips?
Thank heavens, I remembered Richard’s stuff in the freezer this morning. Else there would never have been room in there to get these three in. Tsk!
I bought some extra strong cheddar to have with vegetable shepherd’s pie… but being a dimwit of the highest order, I forgot to order the shepherd’s pies!
. The short-dated replacement for the veggie burger had a ‘Free Short Dated’ sticker on it… which covered the ‘ Use By date!  Good old Iceland!
At least they had some bread in stock today, well, cobs, not the ones I wanted, but still. I got the delivery sorted and all put away… where might be a mystery later.

Started on the blog and stayed at it for a good few hours… it was an embarrassing slow, error-filled job. Much worse than of late.

The landline flashed. It was a lady from Link transport. Confirming tomorrow’s lift to the diabetes course. I checked it with the calendar.
Minutes later, the Doctors surgery rang about my appointment with the nurse on the 26th. The surgery is closing that day for the Queen’s funeral. I bet the Queen never had to wait eight weeks to see her Doctor; now it will be ten weeks!

I found this photo on the SD card when loaded the others up. It seems that I had another meal last night or this morning? I was losing my grip on things here.
Within minutes I had to stop everything to take a rest and get something to eat.
I think the mind-blanks had taken another go at me.
I really believed it was about midday. Checked on the computer, and guess what time it was? 17:10hrs!

Won’t be long until the carers walk in without ringing the buzzer. I’ll stop now and get some nosh of some sort for tonight made. Where did the day go?

Arrived, it was Riya; I knew her name as soon as she answered my question; “Erm, what’s your name?”. Hahaha! Riya pressed the door chime as well before coming in; bless her. I wonder if Richard mentioned anything in their office? She got me sorted in record time, and Riya asked if there was anything else. I said no, and told her to select a nibble and drinkie in thanks. By gum, she moves quick. I only just got to ask her to take the waste bag with her as she was closing the door.

I made up a meal, using the special offer 50%-extra free crinkle cut, McCains microwave chips. Some of the Jenny-supplied tomatoes and veggie burgers and sausages. I ate the burgers and sausages wrapped in a cob. Apart from the pathetic paper-tasting chips, all went down well. Taste: 6.5/10.

I managed to stay awake to watch a ‘Heartbeat’ episode, and I drifted off into the bliss of sleep.

What happened after that is a mystery, but evidently, I got up amd moved some clothes around?

Inchcock: Inchie vs Alto Conflict

/ Inchie / 4 Comments

Last night, while shaving, Alto-Ego returned!


Alto: Aye up, Inchie!.

Inchie: What are you doing back?.

Alto: I never left, yer burke…

Inchie: No need to embarrass like this, is there?.
While I’m shaving and cleaning up the lesion?

Alto: Exactly, I like a laugh occasionally!

Inchie: Laugh at what?.

Alto: Yer tiddly pinkie, Hahaha!.

Inchie: At least I’ve got one, yo ain’t!

Alto: I’m you, ain’t I? Your mentor, guide and mental crippler! And I’ve not got a physical body to be ashamed of like you have!

Inchie: A?

Alto: Gawd, your thick!

Inchie: Well, yer…

Alto: This is why I’ve not been getting at you lately, Turd-face…, yer just a short-arsed overweight whimp, with no residence to my poking fun at you! It’s hardly worth my while trying to make you miserable & depressed; you’ve been this way for months now of your own volition! Is it any wonder I’m losing interest in yer? I’m only here now cause I’d done such a good job in pissing Putin off! This could mean a promotion for me, you know?

Inchie: Promotion? I like the sound of that. Does this mean you’ll get another human to hassle and leave me alone?

Alto: Nae, Dumbo, your memory is gerrin’ worserer! I’ve told yer before, the Alto-Ego Management, insist we stay with any human allotted to us until we get victory…

Inchie: Victory?

Alto: If you stop interrupting me, Brain-dead, I was going to tell yer, yet again; The only way I free myself of you is the Humans death, Confirmed by an appropriate medical institution of utter insanity, or nine attempts at suicide all fail. That, Knob-Rot, is the only escape from you.

Inchie: Erm… I’ve been trying to part company with you, and now you say you’d like to part company with me… am I right?

Alto: Oh, Inchy, my stupidest ever human; You’re just too thick and ignorant to understand the simplest things, and you make a mess off, mistakes and blunders of everything you try to do, don’t you? But that really is not always your fault…

Inchie: Oh, there’s a change in tone Alto?…

Alto: Your willful pig-ignorance, despondency, dispiritedness, defeatism, and docility, sometimes bring out a rare quality in me. Seeing you struggle medically is a laugh for me. The more I mock and depress you, the nearer your suicide gets. I’ve arranged for all the ailments, including Cataract Katey and Dementia Doreen, to have free reign of your body and mind. Soon it will be freedom for me! Your dubiety and incertitude are making you, more than ever, reliant upon me, your Alto-Ego. Thus you are becoming more and more subservient and servile to me… The first Alto-Ego to dent Putin’s determination! The Alto of Altos…

Inchie: Oh! So why did you call at all?

Alto: In a desperate bid to cause you misery. depression, and encourage you to commit suicide, Bozo!

Inchie: Well, you’ve always tried doing that in the past?

Alto: Well, today, I’m gifting you with an accident that will involve a plaster-cast and Hospitalisation…

Inchie: That’s nice…

Alto: What?

Inchie: Well, my depression does not come from physical pain but from the mental stress of living. I admit you did a good job with installing Dementia Doreen, but she’s not taken over completely yet. So don’t fret… I’ll not top myself yet… I’ve never felt better for months than I do at this very minute. What do you think of that?

Alto: Shit!

Inchcock Today Wednesday 14th September 2022

/ Inchie / 16 Comments

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I stirred into ersatz life around 0315hrs, in need of a wee-wee. By the time I’d caught my balance and was up on my feet grabbing Metal-Mickey, another need arose, that of the , and I made my way to the wet room,
I managed to give my right big toe a stubbing of excellent quality, pain-wise. On the end of the open door from the front room. Dropping Metal-Micky, which knocked a photo off of the corner unit and broke the glass of the frame!
I just had to sort the mess out there and then. I had a terribly hard job picking up all the glass while hoping and praying my efforts would be successful in containing or retaining the torpedo that was getting anxious to be freed!
I got it cleaned up, the photo back loosely in the frame. With Back-Pain-Brenda giving me some gip, I dare not hobble in the usual fashion, so I shuffled as speedily as I could manage to the awaiting closet.
  Got into the landing position for the seat, dropped the stick, and then whipped down the jammie bottoms and PP’s in one go; and plunk! I’d not even hit the plastic before the evacuation began.
After a few seconds, there was a worrying hold-up that needed some input on my behalf to get things moving again. Once I got through that snag, things went smoothly again and were not as painful as usual. A few specks of blood from Harolds Haemorrhoids, I reckon, the blood, what bit there was of it, did not have runniness that Little Incies Fungal Lesion shoots out.
The hot water was running better today. Still not like it used to be, but beggars can’t be choosers.
Made up two waste bags; most of the contents were from last night’s farcical series of & last night when I was making the worst ever mess of cooking an uneatable meal. I cringed when I wrote that, remembering all the mistakes I made doing it! I got Richard’s treats ready, not those in the fridge, too early.

Got the computer on, and the mind did it again… I had to sit there, totally incapable of gathering my thoughts or concentration. This happens now and again; I thought maybe it did last night when I was making the meal?

Notwithstanding, within a few minutes, the problems started with WordPress. It would not show the comments on the site page again. Which meant going through the comments tag, which offers no ‘Like’ button, and I always like to use that. Humph!

Nokia

Scam Text!

Around 05:00hrs, I got sa message on the mobile. An odd hour to get one of these, I thought… I heard the new louder tone I’d selected the other day, but could I find the phone? No! Well, not for what seemed like an hour of searching for it, Hehehe! I eventually gave up, and when I got back to the computer after searching each of my three rooms and clothes in the hallway, and knocked the pen off of the desk, got the picker-upperer to retrieve it and – spotted the phone in my slipper? Why I didn’t look there first, I don’t know… Hehehe! I’d love to know how and why it ended up on the slipper. But it will remain a Dementia Doreen’s secret, as a part of the mysteries and enigmas of Woodthorpe Court! The ghosts, wraiths, spectres, cacodemons, apparitions and other grotesqueries that haunt the hallways and lobbies, searching for me to create ambiguities, abstrucities, perplexities, misfortunes and botherations, to scare, worry and baffle me!
I was so annoyed when I opened the message; It was one I’d been having for a year or two. ‘You have been in contact with a confirmed Covid case. Ring this number…’ Grrr! Scammers!

Arrived, looking a little weary the lad was. But we chatted away merrily… well, some of it wasn’t so merry. I told him of my frustration at WordPress not allowing me access to the comments and told him the problems it gave me.

He tried to help as best he could in between his yawnings. But between us, we got more lost with it. Hehehe! Gave him his treats; if anyone deserves them, Richard does. He always goes further in trying to help than any other Carers do. Bade Richard farewell, and I made a brew of Glengettie. There’s a story to this mug of tea: I put the kettle on and saw I was low on teabags in the caddy. So, went into the cupboard to get some more Glengettie out to fill the caddy. And found two tea bags that had fallen at the back. They were round ones, so not Thompsons. They had to be Glengettie, Co-op 99, or J Sainsbury extra-strong. Funny, how can one get distracted by little pointless things like this? I thought I’ll use one now, but it fell to pieces as I picked it up – Gawd, I thought, how long has that been there? I sniffed the other one, which smelt like a Glengettie to me, and made a brew with it; I’ll know by its taste. It was a Glengettie! Amazing how long they last, innit? Lost none of strength or bitterness that is usual with Glengettie. Just thought I tell yer…

Got the Tuesday blog finished and posted. Then made a start on today’s Ode. Got it finished and doctored, then got carried away, adding to the ode-word list… I can’t help it; I love words.

The ♫ Oh, Susana ♫ tune rang from the doorbell. I thought it might be Josie bringing the Sunday lunch tray and things back; thank heavens she’s not left it till later and woke me up again. But no, it wasn’t Josie! I opened the door, and there were some homegrown tomatoes on the floor… which had to be Jenny donating to me.
Always have a tangy taste bite to them, these that Jenny gives me. She knows I love them. Bless her.
I checked on the condition of the sourdough bread from yesterday.
I immediately, and that’s fast for me; I decided to have the bread, well buttered, and tomatoes for lunch… tea or dinner… maybe supper today.

I was late again in getting the done. This could have been that with doing them late yesterday and the graph going into the amber, I’d subconsciously left it late again? I got out the thermometer and started sphygmomanometerisationing.

Well, it was only a thought. Hehehe!
Back up to the danger reds level two, Hypertension stage.
SIA 169, DIA 75, Pulse 78 or 8, and the Body Temperature at 3.34°f.

This up and down is bothering me a smidgeon. I did mention it to the Doctor  I got no suggestions or instructions. In fact, I got no response at all.
It’s being so popular that’s keeping me going, you know! Haha!

I’ve started to keep a new record of the once-daily readings on Excel. It doesn’t look too good, just the two in the green
results over four days. Mmm! Hehehe! It’ll change soon; it always does; you watch, then a day or two later, it’ll shoot up again.

Time to get the bread and tomatoes prepared, methinks.
Bootiful clouds out there when I was slicing the tomatoes, slicing and buttering the bread and getting some chips in the oven. Luckily I have several plasters to pick from when I cut the finger.

I got the chips in the oven and spread some imitation butter on the slices of sourbread. Cut the tomatoes and went to do a J Sainsbury order for next week… but… Hard to believe, I know.


Obviously, Liberty-Global, Virgin Media supremo Mr Fries, has not managed to go four days without the signal going down. Still, as long as he gets his paltry salary of $23.6 million a year, plus bonuses and an expense account, why should he be interested in his customers? You must admire the man’s chicanery, thaumaturgy, figure-shuffling, slithery sidestepping and number-crunching. That somehow fools his bosses that he knows what he’s doing. I hate him, but I’m still jealous of the con-man supreme.

Got the fodder on the tray with a pot of lemon mousse, and I gobbled it all up without any bother. Mind you, it was a small meal for me. Purposely of cause, you see, as a part of my new diet regime. I am determined to lose weight by hook or by crook. I’m dedicated to it…

Two came tonight. Neither rang the door chime again. I mentioned this to both of them. I explained why, calmy, to them again why I wanted them to; “I could have been changing blood pants or taking a wee-wee; had I been doing either, the chime would have alerted me and given me time to stop you walking in and causing me embarrassment, you see?” I’m not sure it got through, and the new Carer seemed annoyed as if I’d told her off, saying We can’t get in your key safe. Well, the door wasn’t locked anyway? The regular gal was okay about it.

The hot water was still as hot as it used to be? Teggies did first, then the shaving – most cautiously. No more chunks of teeth fell off, one… I say…ONE tiny cut shaving, no dizzies, leg dances or banging into anything in the shower session! Brilliant!

Coming out from the ablutionalisationing, I went A-over-T on the towel airer! Clouting my head in the door on my way down. That’ll teach me to go into Smug-Modes! I’m going to try and stop going into them for a bit.

The view from the kitchen window was fantastic. Bootiful! That strip of light has been showing on clear nights for says now.

I put the computer on to see if Mr (Smoke & Mirrors) Fries crap Liberty-Global Virgin Media Internet service was back online – it was, but it ran relatively slow.

Back on the computer, and I updated this blog. Doing rather well at it, actually, for once. However. a . I finished my bottle of spring water and went to fetch tonic water from the kitchen. The view outside was now to me. Magnificent!

After a couple of further hours, I’d nearly finished this blog and was ready to check for errors – Hahaha! Why do I bother? I always miss a load of mistakes in every blog, anyway!

Gave me a short concert of clumps. Followed by a couple whirling noises… ending with a solid thud. I’d love to know what he’s making at this time of night… a drinks cabinet, mayhap? Hahaha!

Humph! Got the checking of the blog finished. I checked three times and found something wrong each time – I will not try again.

Hello, more sounds from Herbert above… I think I’ve worked out what he’s up to… I wonder who the man or woman is with him?

Morning all!

Tuesday 13th September 2022: Inchcock Today

/ Inchie / 6 Comments

POLITICAL CARTOON
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The normal nodding off and waking up in a semi-panic, what felt like every few minutes, went on for hours. Eventually, I woke up in a rather desperate and sudden need of a wee-wee!
I fumbled about to get to the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket) in time... Embarrassment and self-hatred all at the same time… I failed to make it! The main reason was the discomfiting . Which came on before I’d got the PPs down… so that was a good thing. Even better was the way with which the Comfort pants contained the leaking liquid. Had I got the PP’s down before it came, I would have been in an even bigger mess! I clasped the lower regions and somehow got to the wet room with the wooden walking stick, and I used the WC. Despite the bladder letting me down again, I found some appreciation in how the PPs coped with it. I was pleased that I changed to these Depend pants now, more than ever. While cleaning things after taking the tinkle and refreshing my body, the need for the Porcelain Throne arrived. As I sat, alternating between trying to do the crossword puzzle and counting the cracks on the ceiling, as I awaited the cement inside to move, I realised how late it was! 06:45hrs!
Bit of panic then. I’d got s Sainsbury order coming this morning, twixt 06:00 > 10:00hrs, so I may miss it if I’m stuck sat on the Throne when it comes!
I foolishly, mayhaps, tried to force things along with all my might. Once it did start to move, it was swiftly over but so painful. And poor old Harold’s Haemorrhoids were bleeding badly, externally and internally. However, now having some Germoloid to hand, I could clean things up again and ease the stinging. Which I hastily did.
I tried the water taps again on the sink to see if the promised repair would provide me with hot water. Nope, just the tepidness once again.

By the time I’d sorted, washed and got dressed, leaving the door open in case the intercom rang, Richard, came in. He was in a rush again, but that did not stop the lad when he heard my tale of the hot water from calling the maintenance to get someone out yet again to look at it. Bless him.
Just before he left, the intercom rang, and I asked him if he wanted to wait to get the treats that were on the order. No, he had to go, up to the neck in it. Fair enough. Tanked him as the delivery was arriving.
I got the goods checked and returned some podded peas that had a sell by today tag on them. The brown sourdough loaf looked tasty – not to make sure there are no sliced fingers. Hehe!

The flowers for the wardens were what I’d call rustic yellow and red. Got some strawberries for them and chocolates, only need to add some cans of plonk. I rang Deana, but no answer; it might be a little early yet? Burgers for Richard.

Which I did.
Glad they had the Germoloids in stock. They didn’t have any of the Parmentier potatoes, Huh! I got stuff stored away, and I intended to get the Health Checks sorted out. Tried calling Deana again to tell her the nibbles had arrived, no reply.
Made my first brew of the day, a mug of Thompson’s Punjana. I forgot about doing the blood pressure and called Warden Julie, and I told her of the goodies ready to collect. Then, I got on the computer to update and post the Monday blog. The tea had gone cold. So I went to the kitchen to make another mashing.
In came Julie, quickly followed by Deana. I missed out on a natter cause they were talking between themselves, and I could not hear what about. Spit! I think I told them about the hot water.

Was busy making something mechanical, noisily.

It seems the hot water problem the Nottingham City Homes Maintenance could not solve has been passed on to a company called T&S.
Not that this chap could solve it for sure.
When I asked him what the problem was, he was honest enough to tell me he had no idea. all the tests he carried out showed it should be working properly. The only thing he’d changed was the thermostat, and he turned it up a smidgeon.
Well, three hours later, the water was indeed hotter. Nothing like as hot as it used to be, though, but I should be able to have a shave and shower in the morning.

What happened to the day? Nowt was done much, evening carer due shortly. Meal To get done. I’m going to make a chilli stew for myself. And will do my best not to cut any parts of my anatomy, slicing the sourdough bread to dip into the food. Hehe! I’ll it the meal prepared then… Oh, I’ve not done the Blood Pressure yet. I imagine it will be the opposite of yesterday’s panicking high? It does that a lot, up and downing.

Ah, much betterer indeed.
In fact, overall, one of the best for ages, methinks? ‘
I bet when I do the BP Graph site, it will be down low in the amber zone.

There, what did I tell yer? Two extremes in two days.
Ah, well, food preparation time for me.
I can’t help but think I’ve missed or forgotten something? Mmm!


ANOTHER INCHCOCK GASTRONOMIC DISASTER! What was I thinking about? How can even I; make so many cock-ups making just one meal?
Easily seems to be the answer! The good bit first, I didn’t cut any fingers slicing the sourdough bread… fair enough, I did drop the loaf, and did Back-Pain-Brenda no good at all, bending down to clear up the crumbs; then knocked the knife off of the counter. But it missed me. just blunted the tip of the knife.
It took me that long to clear up the crumbs; I lost more time trying to straighten the tip of the knife than I had to reheat the stew in the microwave.

The first spoonful indicated one of the reasons for the almost uneatable flavour I’d conjured up. (I looked in the waste bin later and realised this was true). I’d added a can of baked beans to the chilli stew, but think I put curry-flavoured beans in the pot, not plain ones!
I ate some of it, all the sourdough brown bread that was nice. I was soon back in the kitchen, putting the ¾s of the meal I’d not eaten into food bags to go to the chute in the black bags.
Where more causes of the calamity were discovered. The pot of BBQ seasoning I added was actually basil: the pot was still out on the top. Alongside it should have been a bottle of BBQ sauce from which I added a sludge or two to the meal… no, but there was a bottle of balsamic vinegar?
I shudder to give the taste rating any score at all it would have had to be a minus score. However, the sourdough bread was delightfully tasty. 1.2/10.

I washed the pots in the nearly hot water from the tap, and I got a packet of seaweed crisps to nibble and settled into the £300, second-hand, c1968, charity shop-bought, eyesorely-horrendously grungy beige coloured, Harold Haemorrhoid-testing, easily-falloutable from, unfit-for-use, not working, recliner, and went into a gloriously dream-filled sleep.

Jodie came in, not ringing the doorbell again. She hovered over my prostrate but crumpled adipocerous bellied body, giving out a loud but cheerful “How are you, okay?” I’m not sure if I answered or not! The visit was a blur, really.

I had planned to get up later and make a start on updating this blog… I meant later in the night. But I drifted off again, and I got another five hours of sleep in!
Waking at 03:35hrs, in need of a wee-wee.

Inchcock Today: Monday 12th September 2022

/ Inchie / 8 Comments

Inchcock Blames the new medications for this Ode.
They are called Talimogene Laherparepvec.
He hopes he will never have to ask for any.
How are you supposed to Pronounce it? Hehehe!
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Having to boil kettles and saucepans cause the hot water is not hot. And the shakes and dizzies have been rampant! So no Diary as such, just bits I can recollect, and from a few scribbled unreadable notes. Sorry! Owing to many cock-ups and the camera not working for some unknown reason.

06:30hrs: I woke; it’d been another night of waking ups again. And I rose, dragging the superfluously elephantine-bellied body up on the poor feet, and caught my balance. And went to check if the hot water was hot yet. It wasn’t!

I mused over whether or not to have a shave in the lukewarm water… the usual decision-making routine. Humming and hawing, dilly-dallying and generally fence-sitting, procrastination took over. After last night’s mega-shaving nicks, I was dubious… but I went ahead again and had a stand-up wash & shave. Amazing how one can cut oneself so easily! Of course, during the shaving session, I had a and , which ensured that the blood flowed. The cold hop water did nothing to stop it from flowing. So I had an expensive Brute splashing session that did the trick, temporarily.

Off to the kitchen, intending to make a brew of Thompson’s Punjana tea.
I got sidetracked by the moon that was still trying to get through.
Took the wide shot and then tried to get a decent zoomed-in picture. So, you can see, I didn’t exactly do a good job of it. Humph! No sooner had I zoomed in; guess who paid me another visit?

I got the waste bags made up, only two this morning for Richard; if he comes, it should be. I got his treats, and thank-you bag made up, all bar the fresh stuff in the fridge.

Next, I got the done. Another giant leap for mankind! Hehehe! Terrible results! SYS shot up to 173, DIA a massive 146, and even the Pulse was an astronomical 98!!!

Not good, is it? Can’t wait until tomorrow to see if it’s back down again. I mentioned these fluctuating results to the Doctor last week – I didn’t even get an answer, scoff or tut from her? Yet Sunday’s figures were marvellous?

I got on the computer and got myself in a double mess at the same time, more or less. First, the photo reader was toying with me, but I kept all calm and went through the usual routine to try and get it working again. I’m so proud of myself; for making and keeping a list of what I tried last time, and I kept it handy in the left-hand drawer!
As I was working my way through the actions to try… I realised that I must have scratched at the chin, and the blood was flowing again. Nothing like badly, just little streaks, but it took me ages and about ten sheets of kitchen towel and £3 worth of Brut to get it to stop! I know this is impossible, but I thought I heard  laughing; hehe!

The morning Carer arrived, it was No-Yawning-Richard. He looked a lot better in himself today. I think it’s because it is his first day back after his break in shifts.
He noticed the bloody tissues in the waste bucket. I informed the lad of the hot water being off for three days. Richard got onto the phone and reported Nottingham City Homes Maintenance of the problem without messing about. Told me they would be coming sometime today. Bless him. None of the other carers does that for me. So glad I gave him an extra big bag of nibbles and drinks now! He looked at the blood pressure,
He didn’t do a wristlet alarm battery check, but last week if I recall, he did it on a Wednesday. He’ll not forget to.
He’s a good lad, and seeing him more like himself was a pleasure.

After I’d bade Richard farewell and all the best, I returned to the computer.
But not for long. Carol rang; she wanted to do the laundry. Lovely! The poor gal has been covering for Esther. Who decided to stay two more weeks on her holiday in South Africa, leaving poor Carol in a quandary. He thought she was away for three weeks, and she made plans of her own. Now she is struggling to get the washing done for everyone. Bless her. 

Then, a memory blank fell over me. No more notes on the memory pad. I had to check on WordPress to see if I’d finished and sent off the Sunday post. Luckily I had!
I think I lost about four or five hours. Not sure if any plumber had called?

Sort of came back to mock-life, and I was working on words for the Ode. So I carried on.
I went to make a brew and found a cold pored mug of tea next to the kettle. I wonder when I made that? No milk it, stone cold! Also, a packet of BBQ rice was on the counter, and the oven was on… nothing in it!
I got on and started this blog so late it was well into the afternoon; in fact, it was almost evening! Kicked off, and I’m nearly out of Peptac now. Not that it is any good, just better than nothing.

Jodie arrived. Again she came in without pressing the chime and came right up behind me as I was concentrating on the computer. She’ll give me a heart attack one day! I asked if Jodie could press the button before coming in (again). But all it got was a smile! Hehe! Still, She’s not a bad gal. I remembered the chocolate mints I’d been meaning to give her since last Friday. Got the medications given to me, and she was soon off.

Aha, the intercom lit up. Twas, the plumber from Nottingham City Homes Maintenance. He looked around and told me the additional switch in the airing cupboard had been turned off. Probably the Friday plumber who solved the leaking tap turned it off for some reason? Cause I’ve had no hot water since Saturday? He assured me that it would start getting hot after ten PM. GrrreatI Gave him a choice of thank you treats, and off he went! 

I carried on with the blogging. At about half-passed ten, I checked the hot water situation. Still cold. I must be patient. I got the roast veg risotto in the oven and will add the microwave BBQ-flavoured rice later. Then when both are ready, put them in a dish and add some vegan BBQ sauce.
After eating it, I’ll test the hot water again. Please be working!

Got the nosh sorted out.
As planned, the BBQ-flavoured Ben’s rice and roast vegetable risotto. Some mini-tomatoes.
A diddly pot of lemon mousse for afters.
This was the meal of the year up to now! Fantastic flavour! Taste: 9.3/10!

Went to check on the hot water. It was still only lukewarm! .
How disappointing! I think I may have sworn a little under my breath in frustration. 

Inchcock Today: Sunday 11th September 2022

/ Inchie / 2 Comments

SUNDAY’S POLITICAL CARTOON
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SUNDAY’S ODE
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07:10hrs: Yet another night of jumping awake and waiting to nod off again. So much so that on waking up proper, around 05:00hrs, I drifted off unintentionally until 07:10hrs. Sweet Morpheus was not kind to me last night at all.
I feared that the Carer might have called earlier, but he/she could not get in. Especially if it was an annoying one who refused to press the doorbell. I always hear that, and it never fails to wake me up if asleep, and it had not done that. I caught my balance and hobbled to unlock the front door. But it was not locked! So was pretty sure that they would have walked in anyway.
Being up late, I started to prep Josies veg for her chilli-con-carne meal. Got them on the boil and added them to the saucepan.
Got the sorted out. A nice looking set of returns this time. SIA dropped to 138. DIA down to 61, Pulse up but not a lot, to 78.
Put the figures into the CP analyser and got this returned. Great, I’m back just in the amber! In the High-Normal Zone.

My noisy Neighbour above, Herbert, sounded off, with a different style of sound today. A chug-chugging for a few minutes, then a loud thud. Then silence… Dang sang dang, Dang! Oh, I do hope he’s not hurt himself; you know, dropped a steam engine on his foot and is laying there in absolute agony as the hot steam burns its way through his clothing and into his lower regions. I considered going up to ask if he was alright, just for a laugh.

Off to make my first brew of Glengettie Welsh tea. And I thought (I do that occasionally), Blimey, it’s dark out there!

I temporarily lifted the glasses from my nose to reveal the right view, although blurred from the window – it was foggy, to say the least. The first photo was taken straight ahead.
The second one of straight down n from the window of the Chestnut Drive car park. A good job I was using the grab strap on my wrist. Cause I dropped the Lumix, but it didn’t get away from me; the strap held it.
Then went out on the balcony and took this picture. Not that there is much to see other than fog. Hehe!

I went through to the kitchen and checked on Josie’s food progress. Looking good and tasting good too! I reckon the basil helped today.
Just hope Josie likes it.

I went on the blogging duties then and got involved with the Ode Words list again. An hour or two was lost there. Tsk! I  reluctantly had to force myself to stop.

Got the meal delivered to Josie. Who did not mention Betty Bunter today? But did ask me for the umpteenth time if I drink the gin etc. I said no. She added: Whyever do you buy it then? I did mention this time; For the pleasure of sharing and caring, Josie. I got a furrowed brow and an odd sort of ‘He’s nuts!’ look. Hehe!

Then I set about cleaning up the kitchen… and the hot water tap was running cold! So, no shaving for me today… unless it comes back on. Then the fear that I may have left the tap running in the wet room came over me…
The old ticker was beating as I hurried into the wet room – but all was okay in there! Phew!
Back to cleaning the kitchen, which was a bit risky, Accifauxpas-wise. Boiling kettles and saucepans of water so I could clean up was done carefully. and slowly to avoid any spillages.  

I’d filled another waste bag already, so took it to the chute room.
I used a photo from the last time I did this. (Cause I didn’t take the camera with me) It’s getting a regular habit. Dropped the posh-looking collapsible stick, bent down to retrieve it, and hit my head in the cast-iron chute lid. I merely laughed off the pained head, right knee and my feeling a pratt. And skipped back to the flat yodelling.

I got the Porcelain Throne activities done and checked the knee and head the ankle was suddenly stinging. Rubbed some Phorpain gel in the knee, and spot of Germolene on the back of the head, and some Arnica cream on the ankle. I think I got these the wrong way around? The ankles and feet looked pretty good.

Time to get my own nosh now.
Apart from undercooking the veggie burger, overcooking the chips (fries), and the Heinz bean-filled potato croquettes, well; I broke another tooth eating a chip. The undercooked burger gave me the wind and runs. As for the bean-filled potato croquettes, Never again! I still have four of them left in the freezer, so if anyone fancies them and has a liking for eating cardboard, please come and help yourself. But, be warned, a taste rating of 1â…›/10 was given. Mostly mayhap to my lack of culinary skills, though? Guilty!

Went to get the pots washed, but the hot water was barely warm again. Hell of a dangerous job having to heat water in the kettle and saucepan to use. And how do I go on in trying to shave? I’d assumed the water would get heated again by now, but no! I didn’t shave yesterday, so must do it tonight somehow.

Cassie woke me up. I was deep in sleep and dreaming. Of a cyber-friend, Billum. He was at a laptop using a slide rule and kept cutting his finger? Cassie got the medications done and was keen to get away, not that she rushed anything, oh no. She asked if anything else was needed as she approached the inner door. There wasn’t. and I offered her a choice of drinks and nibbles. She only took a Tango drink… I think. Took the waste gag out with her, bless her cotton socks.

I decided to get a stand-up wash and shave and just make the best of shaving carefully. I should not have risked it, really. The water was barely warm still, and each time I refilled the sink, it seemed to be getting colder. When the water was really hot, as it has been for months now, if, or rather when I cut myself shaving, the hot water kept the bleeding down to a minimum. But not today, oh no! I stopped shaving, deciding that the hot water must surely be hot by the morning, and I have the shave then.

I settled to watch a programme on remembering the Twin Towers. But drifted off at the first set of commercials.