Inchcock Today Wednesday 14th September 2022

POLITICAL CARTOON
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Sad, innit? Hehehe!
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I stirred into ersatz life around 0315hrs, in need of a wee-wee. By the time I’d caught my balance and was up on my feet grabbing Metal-Mickey, another need arose, that of the , and I made my way to the wet room,
I managed to give my right big toe a stubbing of excellent quality, pain-wise. On the end of the open door from the front room. Dropping Metal-Micky, which knocked a photo off of the corner unit and broke the glass of the frame!
I just had to sort the mess out there and then. I had a terribly hard job picking up all the glass while hoping and praying my efforts would be successful in containing or retaining the torpedo that was getting anxious to be freed!
I got it cleaned up, the photo back loosely in the frame. With Back-Pain-Brenda giving me some gip, I dare not hobble in the usual fashion, so I shuffled as speedily as I could manage to the awaiting closet.
  Got into the landing position for the seat, dropped the stick, and then whipped down the jammie bottoms and PP’s in one go; and plunk! I’d not even hit the plastic before the evacuation began.
After a few seconds, there was a worrying hold-up that needed some input on my behalf to get things moving again. Once I got through that snag, things went smoothly again and were not as painful as usual. A few specks of blood from Harolds Haemorrhoids, I reckon, the blood, what bit there was of it, did not have runniness that Little Incies Fungal Lesion shoots out.
The hot water was running better today. Still not like it used to be, but beggars can’t be choosers.
Made up two waste bags; most of the contents were from last night’s farcical series of & last night when I was making the worst ever mess of cooking an uneatable meal. I cringed when I wrote that, remembering all the mistakes I made doing it! I got Richard’s treats ready, not those in the fridge, too early.

Got the computer on, and the mind did it again… I had to sit there, totally incapable of gathering my thoughts or concentration. This happens now and again; I thought maybe it did last night when I was making the meal?

Notwithstanding, within a few minutes, the problems started with WordPress. It would not show the comments on the site page again. Which meant going through the comments tag, which offers no ‘Like’ button, and I always like to use that. Humph!

Nokia

Scam Text!

Around 05:00hrs, I got sa message on the mobile. An odd hour to get one of these, I thought… I heard the new louder tone I’d selected the other day, but could I find the phone? No! Well, not for what seemed like an hour of searching for it, Hehehe! I eventually gave up, and when I got back to the computer after searching each of my three rooms and clothes in the hallway, and knocked the pen off of the desk, got the picker-upperer to retrieve it and – spotted the phone in my slipper? Why I didn’t look there first, I don’t know… Hehehe! I’d love to know how and why it ended up on the slipper. But it will remain a Dementia Doreen’s secret, as a part of the mysteries and enigmas of Woodthorpe Court! The ghosts, wraiths, spectres, cacodemons, apparitions and other grotesqueries that haunt the hallways and lobbies, searching for me to create ambiguities, abstrucities, perplexities, misfortunes and botherations, to scare, worry and baffle me!
I was so annoyed when I opened the message; It was one I’d been having for a year or two. ‘You have been in contact with a confirmed Covid case. Ring this number…’ Grrr! Scammers!

Arrived, looking a little weary the lad was. But we chatted away merrily… well, some of it wasn’t so merry. I told him of my frustration at WordPress not allowing me access to the comments and told him the problems it gave me.

He tried to help as best he could in between his yawnings. But between us, we got more lost with it. Hehehe! Gave him his treats; if anyone deserves them, Richard does. He always goes further in trying to help than any other Carers do. Bade Richard farewell, and I made a brew of Glengettie. There’s a story to this mug of tea: I put the kettle on and saw I was low on teabags in the caddy. So, went into the cupboard to get some more Glengettie out to fill the caddy. And found two tea bags that had fallen at the back. They were round ones, so not Thompsons. They had to be Glengettie, Co-op 99, or J Sainsbury extra-strong. Funny, how can one get distracted by little pointless things like this? I thought I’ll use one now, but it fell to pieces as I picked it up – Gawd, I thought, how long has that been there? I sniffed the other one, which smelt like a Glengettie to me, and made a brew with it; I’ll know by its taste. It was a Glengettie! Amazing how long they last, innit? Lost none of strength or bitterness that is usual with Glengettie. Just thought I tell yer…

Got the Tuesday blog finished and posted. Then made a start on today’s Ode. Got it finished and doctored, then got carried away, adding to the ode-word list… I can’t help it; I love words.

The ♫ Oh, Susana ♫ tune rang from the doorbell. I thought it might be Josie bringing the Sunday lunch tray and things back; thank heavens she’s not left it till later and woke me up again. But no, it wasn’t Josie! I opened the door, and there were some homegrown tomatoes on the floor… which had to be Jenny donating to me.
Always have a tangy taste bite to them, these that Jenny gives me. She knows I love them. Bless her.
I checked on the condition of the sourdough bread from yesterday.
I immediately, and that’s fast for me; I decided to have the bread, well buttered, and tomatoes for lunch… tea or dinner… maybe supper today.

I was late again in getting the done. This could have been that with doing them late yesterday and the graph going into the amber, I’d subconsciously left it late again? I got out the thermometer and started sphygmomanometerisationing.

Well, it was only a thought. Hehehe!
Back up to the danger reds level two, Hypertension stage.
SIA 169, DIA 75, Pulse 78 or 8, and the Body Temperature at 3.34°f.

This up and down is bothering me a smidgeon. I did mention it to the Doctor  I got no suggestions or instructions. In fact, I got no response at all.
It’s being so popular that’s keeping me going, you know! Haha!

I’ve started to keep a new record of the once-daily readings on Excel. It doesn’t look too good, just the two in the green
results over four days. Mmm! Hehehe! It’ll change soon; it always does; you watch, then a day or two later, it’ll shoot up again.

Time to get the bread and tomatoes prepared, methinks.
Bootiful clouds out there when I was slicing the tomatoes, slicing and buttering the bread and getting some chips in the oven. Luckily I have several plasters to pick from when I cut the finger.

I got the chips in the oven and spread some imitation butter on the slices of sourbread. Cut the tomatoes and went to do a J Sainsbury order for next week… but… Hard to believe, I know.


Obviously, Liberty-Global, Virgin Media supremo Mr Fries, has not managed to go four days without the signal going down. Still, as long as he gets his paltry salary of $23.6 million a year, plus bonuses and an expense account, why should he be interested in his customers? You must admire the man’s chicanery, thaumaturgy, figure-shuffling, slithery sidestepping and number-crunching. That somehow fools his bosses that he knows what he’s doing. I hate him, but I’m still jealous of the con-man supreme.

Got the fodder on the tray with a pot of lemon mousse, and I gobbled it all up without any bother. Mind you, it was a small meal for me. Purposely of cause, you see, as a part of my new diet regime. I am determined to lose weight by hook or by crook. I’m dedicated to it…

Two came tonight. Neither rang the door chime again. I mentioned this to both of them. I explained why, calmy, to them again why I wanted them to; “I could have been changing blood pants or taking a wee-wee; had I been doing either, the chime would have alerted me and given me time to stop you walking in and causing me embarrassment, you see?” I’m not sure it got through, and the new Carer seemed annoyed as if I’d told her off, saying We can’t get in your key safe. Well, the door wasn’t locked anyway? The regular gal was okay about it.

The hot water was still as hot as it used to be? Teggies did first, then the shaving – most cautiously. No more chunks of teeth fell off, one… I say…ONE tiny cut shaving, no dizzies, leg dances or banging into anything in the shower session! Brilliant!

Coming out from the ablutionalisationing, I went A-over-T on the towel airer! Clouting my head in the door on my way down. That’ll teach me to go into Smug-Modes! I’m going to try and stop going into them for a bit.

The view from the kitchen window was fantastic. Bootiful! That strip of light has been showing on clear nights for says now.

I put the computer on to see if Mr (Smoke & Mirrors) Fries crap Liberty-Global Virgin Media Internet service was back online – it was, but it ran relatively slow.

Back on the computer, and I updated this blog. Doing rather well at it, actually, for once. However. a . I finished my bottle of spring water and went to fetch tonic water from the kitchen. The view outside was now to me. Magnificent!

After a couple of further hours, I’d nearly finished this blog and was ready to check for errors – Hahaha! Why do I bother? I always miss a load of mistakes in every blog, anyway!

Gave me a short concert of clumps. Followed by a couple whirling noises… ending with a solid thud. I’d love to know what he’s making at this time of night… a drinks cabinet, mayhap? Hahaha!

Humph! Got the checking of the blog finished. I checked three times and found something wrong each time – I will not try again.

Hello, more sounds from Herbert above… I think I’ve worked out what he’s up to… I wonder who the man or woman is with him?

Morning all!

16 thoughts on “Inchcock Today Wednesday 14th September 2022

  1. Poor new carer. Maybe she a bit macabre and wants to see blood and wee wee. Nice you got a natter with Richard. You Vitals have been on a roller coaster ride. Toe stubbing really suck. Wonderful sunset pictures. I had to get up in the night to wee wee, but it was a struggle with Glenda and Gwendolyn on my legs, Loki at my waist and Sasha on my chest. That 62 pounds of cats I had to get out from under.

    • Cheers, Tim. I’m hoping Hristina comes next week, I can show her the figures and ask what she thinks about the up & downing.
      Gawd, you took me back then Tim, I only had Cyril and Lady to disturb. Cyril was ‘natually fat cat, the vet said when I took him in because he was getting like a furry rugby ball before he a year old. Haha! The vet told me what to feed him… no, what not to feed him, and assured me he was in good form. What a relief I thought – then paid the £99 bill.
      How you manage with that flock of cats is amazing, bless ’em!
      Keep safe.

  2. You should use that slipper as a phone holder, that way you could find both the phone and the slipper. The other slipper could serve as spare holder. Idea suggested by Lab 18, I am giving the inventor a certificate in a frame — a frame with unbroken glass, just to be on the side of safety.
    Richard really does do the most detailed work, whereas some Carers think that simply snowing up is enough. Just opining of course, I keep folder with ready-to-go opines for any and/or all occasions. Haha!!!
    Those were two very fine photos of the horizon at different moments. Same sun, different day. 🙂

    • Hahaha, great giggling-bringing thoughts o the slipper, Billum.
      The new Carer was offended when I asked her to use the doorchime, the other gal, Jodie I think, just smiled; I’ve asked her to ring as well before coming in, but she never has yet.
      Richard always rings and enters, bless him. I gave him some extra treats today, he earns them. I love his yawning in a morning.
      Fine job the lab came up with. I did the ablutions earlier, although it was late at night, and could I find the slipper that had the phone in it? I found it within a coupple of hours though… on the carers table in full open view!!! I did feel a fool!

      • Shops should sell slippers next to electronics.
        Some Carers would have it that their jobs could be better…were it not for customers. Richard at least tries, and knows why he is there.
        Slippers can also be used for storing other things — such as a slide rule, a BP reader, eyeglasses, a torch, MI descriptions, a spare slide rule…

      • Now there’s a good idea, Billum! Mayhap design waste bins in the shape of a giant slipper, cushioned, thus less painful toe-stubbings may be the result?
        Peraps with side pockets the sixe and shape of spectacles, slide rules, etc.? And essentially, a TV remote pocket with padlock?
        Hahaha!

      • Slippers fit every modality.
        Door chime beauty is in the eye and ear of the beholder. You can also cover a chime with the odd slipper of course.
        Richard is a 24/7 yawner then.
        The saga of the phone and slipper became epic, did it not? And in full view too. I fank you, Sir!

      • Hahaha!
        Being a sufferer of bromodosis, the slippers often have a life of their own, methinks.
        Last Monday, Richard was Yawnless on his visit. He’s made up for it on Tue, Wed and Thursday, though. Hehe!
        Cheers Billum.

      • Many years ago, the Doc first put me on medicated cream or ointment for the bromodosis, but that like the Aludrox was removed from the listings cause of the cost. I used Germolene (I could reach the feet in those days), and it cleared it up for good!)
        What a Doctor!
        A memory of Thursday, Richard took the freebies and waste bags out with him, as I wished him to get some sleep, he gave a yawn that was still going when he got to the end of the hallway. Hehehe!

      • It appears that your quack of a doctor does not offer any alternative measures, but even a return call is a rarity. Es ist alles beschissen.
        Richard is a Yawn Master, setting records in sustained yawnery. Sleep would help but you can’t force yourself asleep. Good of him to lug those waste bags, while yawning.

      • Hahaha! That is about the description I had in mind for the quack, Billum.
        A good lad Richard is. I’m afraid today, Monday, his first day back on his work rosta, which id usually when I catch him at his witty best, and confabulations flow. But no! Not this Monday. He was already yawning, and his perkiness was lower than normal. Still, a bag of treats cheered him a smidgeon. And he took the waste bag with him.
        SM is toying with me lately – Swine! Hope he’s betterer for thee and HRH? ♥

      • If it quacks like a quack… Haha!!
        I wish Richard could get a break from his brutal schedule. Perhaps next Monday then for the Yawnster.
        A trade off: a bag of treats for lugging a bag of trash.
        SM has been kinder to Lisa in the past week, so he needs now to tend to the sleepy-head in 72. ♥

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