– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – Panic-Modes – depressions – self-pitying, Doreen Dementia & Anne Gyna, combined with Frustration Frank today.To curse everything that I tried to do or find solutions too! – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
Woke up. (Well, it’s something to do, innit?) Got the waste bags made up took the overnight wee-wee bucket to be emptied, washed and disinfected, and back to the kitchenette to make a mug of tea.
And I started sorting out the fridge contents. As you’ll have noticed, the mind was a smidge wayward and wandering this morning. I took a terrible photo of the morning view as the day was getting brighter, the thought to myself, I do a lot of that, you know, Doreen Dementia permitting, of course!)
Made the brew of Glengettie and took it with me to the computer, and… a Panic Mode was engaged. What had I done wrong here? The time on the computer was an hour different to all the other clocks. I checked on the mantle top one, the kitchen clock, the wristwatch, and the wet room clock. In fact, I used the Porcelain Throne while in there – one word covers the experience – Solid!
Washed and back to the computer. Even I can’t believe this… but I phoned Jenny to see what time it was! Yes, I’d missed the clocks going back! Which explains why I was also concerned, thinking I’d not heard the Carer arriving. Tsk! It’s beyond sad; this is bad. Class One – Grade A – Docility-Status, Frustration and Self-Loathing modes briefly attended as well. Arrived, and looked tired again, poor lad. But he was bright enough, and after the tablets were taken, we had a minute nattering he was in a rush but still took the waste bags with him for me to the chute. Josie’s meal prepping next. I boiled a large potato, and when it was nearly done, I cut it up into Josie-size pieces, and got then sprayed with oil, and into the preheated oven to crisp up. I think Josie likes these in the chilli-stew. Which had been on the stove gently warming through, with 7-Veg sauce, tomato passata, onions and some chopped tomatoes. I hope she appreciates the effort I put into this for her. She rarely says thanks to me. As long as she’s happy. It’s getting harder and harder to do now. Still, as long as she enjoys them, I can ask no more.
What a great session that was. So many of my usual annoying ailments gave me a free ride this morning – And, as well, besides that, I only had one shaving cut, a tiny one. The were also kind to me. I may be laughing here, but it’s Worrying this is? Hahaha!
Grrreat Blood Pressure Result today!
Finally, and proudly on time yet again, I got the meals for Josie prepped and served up on the tray. A cold version in the grey-lidded tub so she can put it straight into her fridge to eat on Monday. Drinkies and after nibbles supplied as per... and off to deliver it to her door. There was a long wait, several minutes, and I pressed the bell again; in case she was in the shower and did not hear the first one. The meal was getting colder and colder. There was no point in me having heated it up for 30-seconds in the microwave before delivering it, was there. The main worry was is she alright? As I was going back into my flat to call someone about Josie possibly being poorly or having taken a fall… The door opened to reveal Josie. That was a relief! The casual semi-annoyed likelihood at me pressing the bell twice was, “I was on the phone, too, my Sister!” I think she was a little peeved? Ah, well, you can’t win them all. Hehe!
Finally, I got the Friday.. no, Saturday blog posted off. And had to have a break and sit down; the sudden fatigue arrived. I put two baking potatoes in the oven, and .
I woke up, and darkness was falling. I went off into the kitchen and took this photo on the left, of the evening view, in mid-stream of getting the potatoes out of the oven. I halved them and removed the innards into a large mixing bowl. Where the flesh was mangled and mashed with a blob of butter, sea salt and much of the gated Leicester cheese! The resulting meal from my culinary escapades, with the last cod and veg sausages, was one of my better efforts, I’m proud to say. The cheesy baked potatoes were the highlight, taste-wise. Stunningly tasty, the sausages were grand; even the cheap large white cob, which was used to wrap around sausages and dipped into the BBQ sauce, was a cut above my usual too. A Flavour-Rating of 9.3/10 was given! A record-high score, I think? Well filled up and satisfied by the feast… I .
Rudely awoken by , as (I think?) came into the room. Being half-asleep and not having made any notes, I’m not sure if anything of note occurred during the visit, but have a vague idea she was asking me if I was sure I was okay? Just being so tired gave the impression. But I was fine otherwise… hope I thanked her for the concern. Sorry if not, Jodie… also I hope I got your name right too?
But it was fitfully broken. So many times did I wake up and nod off again. I lost count of how many springing awakes I had. But, I was grateful that I got back into the land of nod each time. After the umpteenth time of waking, I needed a wee-wee this time. And the most annoying was needed as I was preparing to use the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket) with such a lot of PMAD (Post-Micturition-After Dribbling) that by the time I’d waited for it to all flow, I was much more awake, and started working on this post updating around 00:30hrs.
Someone said I should lead my life precociously…
So I looked it up on synonyms; Advanced, forwardly…
Before one’s time, improperly, preliminarily & brainily…
05:00hrs: I have never woken up like this before. The bursting back into imitation life was so violent, my whole body, and there’s a lot of it, you know; jumped up and landed back on the second-hand, £300, c1968, overwhelmingly-sickeningly beige coloured, tatty, uncomfortable recliner, and the second I realised that poor were bleeding, another problem arose. The need most necessitous need for the , this became crucially obvious. No leg stretching or balance exercises were considered. In fumbling-bumbling fashion, I somehow got myself to the wet room in what must have been a record time for me. I’ve no idea how I held things back in rush to get there on time, but I did! and I believe warranted in this case. Although as I sat there as the evacuated produce squelched its own way out, I became aware of a pain in the left foot , and I assumed I must have stubbed it en route, but in my panicky haste to get to the Throne, hadn’t realised it. No extraordinary pong or bleeding either, and also, there was no input needed from me. Why I almost enjoyed it! This incident had taken my mind off of the disasters suffered yesterday. But as I washed and got changed into the day clobber, the memory of the hospital letter came to the fore, and I worried about how I was going to cope and not make mistakes with it. I got cleaned and ointmentated. I was definitely in a better frame of mind than I was yesterday, but naturally, I was still worried about coping with the Cataract instructions, arranging the Easy-Lift both ways, can I find out what time to pick me up afterwards, have I got to use one of those listed in the letter transporters? How can get someone to go with me that doesn’t cost a fortune? Now, I’m getting myself worked up for nothing. Because there is nothing that can be done until Monday… and that’s if I can get through to anyone. Humph!
is starting to give me what for now. If joins in, I don’t think I’ll be any good for anything then.
I got on with updating the Friday blog. With all the details of the farces that took place and the worrying letter etc., Believe it or not, it took me a further nine hours to get it done! And then, before I made a start on this one! I fell a little and my thoughts got me feeling again.
Arrived and was in a positive mood. I feel my telling her about yesterday’s farces, and the Cataract letter should not have been mentioned. I think I must have sounded like an ineffective whinging old man! Which, fair enough, I am! But no need for me to advertise the fact is there. Sam asked me if she wanted me to ask… I’ve forgotten her name now, but the new lady in charge at Meridian Health and Care; to call and see me on Monday. My EQ warned me of staggering upcoming charges at this point. But I’m stumped; how can get free help? Sam selected her bottle in thanks, and Sam took the two waste bags with her to the chute for me. ♥
Many hours later, still, I was still updating the Friday burlesque happenings when the landline rang. It was my neighbour and friend Jenny. She is on Virgin Media, and she told me that she’d received an email telling her that the internet would go down on Wednesday, 2nd November, for maintenance work. She knew I was on Virgin and let me know in case they hadn’t informed me. I found out later they had not let me know. This all adds to the frustrations. I mentioned the Cataracts are being done on the 1st of November, so I may not be able to use the internet for several days until the eye cover comes off. That was kind of her. Thanks, Jenny! ♥
In fact, I started to feel a little out of it after doing some more work and finally getting the blog sent off. Afterwards, I tried to get into the WP reader. Oh, I’m in… but will it let me post comments and likes? I’ll give it a go? Grrreat! I Got on! Better get the Health Checks done, then. It is getting late. The evening carer is due soon. Better get the sphygmomanometerisating done. Better late than never. You never know; the BP might be lower now? We shall see…
It was lower as well! Close to the Amber Zone, no less! Only just in the Hypertension Red-1!
I put some imitation slices in the oven on a lowish heat.
And in came Chloe. Told her, not moaningly though, of the problems I have with the Doctors visit and the Cataract 8-page letter of instructions that merely confuses me. Also, getting the cash to pay for the lifts and which service I am allowed to use, then booking them. I’ll only have one day come Monday, to sort it all. Then I’ve got to locate the two departments I’ve to go to? Pre-Assessment Clinic, then the East Day Cases Unit Outpatients Clinic! Chloe did the medications and said she would also remind their boss, Tina, that I needed help. I insisted she chose a drink in thanks. She took the waste bag with her when she left. Telling me not to worry. Not to worry? Me? Mission impossible nowadays, that is. Haha!
Then, yet another problem came to my attention. I found that I’d got an Asda-Walmart order due for Wednesday, the 2nd of November, the cataract repair day! WHAT NEXT? So, I changed the order day on the web. It took me a while to work out how to do it. But, within an hour or so, I’d got it moved to Thursday. Worra life!
Added these evening photos of the amazing sunset, all taken within half an hour. The rapidly changing scenes were brilliant.
Dearie me, Then I whiffed a smell of burning… the food in the oven!!!
I got the slices hacked free of the oven tray and got the pan in the sink in bleach, washing up liquid and soda. Got the burnt offering slices and some fries from a packet on two paper plates and took them through to the computer. Pulled out the drawer and ate the burnt offerings while working on this blog. Not a wise decision after losing a tooth eating the same thing last night! But I got away with it.
Then the job of cleaning the oven, kitchen and pan had to be done. Was again reluctant.
I resettled in the £300, bought eight years ago from the second-hand shop, Harold Haemorrhoid testing, repugnantly beige-coloured, crumb containing, virus-breeding, acne-giving, rickety, itch-producing, none-working recliner.
I woke up nearly five hours later, much refreshed at 01:40hrs. The smell from the abandoned meal I left in the kitchen permeated sickeningly throughout the flat. This forced me from the recliner to bag it up several times and into a final waste bag. A twinge of guilt at the state of the surrounding kitchen encouraged me clean things a little. (Not a lot, mind you!)
After my almost ten-minute marathon cleaning-up session, I took these photos of the early-morning view. While taking them, just once, I saw the planet Jupiter. But the clouds covered it before I got the Lumix out.
I made a brew of Thompson’s Signature tea. Then took it with me back to the computer and got her booted up. Got the photos from yesterday loaded and doctored on CorelDraw to try and make them clearer… at which I failed. (I know it must be hard for you to believe that I failed at anything) Hehehe! Well, I thought that the Blood Pressure figures would be enough to put me down towards the amber zone.
But, No! The NHS Analyser put me in the Hypertension +1 Red yet again.
Still. come thinking about it: The SIA at 155 was, I thought to be, pretty decent compared to the previous few day’s numbers.
The DIA at 92 let me down with being so high, I suppose.
The Pulse was a little higher and more close to the target.
As for the Body Temperature, that was even closer to the target figure of 35°f than it’s been for weeks. Good, I think.Not sure what this indicates, though. Got the Thursday blog finished and posted off to WordPress.
Off to the wet room. Trotsky Terence fought back a bit this morning. Constipation Conrad has been mastering things for the last week or so. The foul odour that accompanied the evacuated product was a cut above normal. The Karki-coloured plum-sized turds disintegrated on contact with the water? The main things were; There was no pain, only a smidge of bleeding, and as mentioned, one Helluva-putrid-pong!
I’d put the kettle on, and I was washing the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee Bucket) after taking several PSSU (Persistent, Short, Sharp, Uncomfortable) mode wee-wees. And cause I was in the kitchen, I did not hear the tune that rang, and I got a jump when she came into the kitchen and greeted me. Hahaha! I asked if Jodie would be kind enough to help me get my socks and fasten the Velcro on the shoes, as I am out this morning at the Riverside Diabetic clinic in Bulwell. She consented. She was yawning away like a good un! Bless her! Jodie did the medications, and we chatted… well, I did; it helped keep her awake as she was on her last legs, methinks. Medications sorted, she kindly got the socks on my feet for me.
Then it dawned on me she could not do the Velcro, as I was still in my jammie bottoms! So, I nipped to the wet room and got new PPs on, then changed into my trews and back to the recliner, where Jodie fastened the Velcro on the shoes. I joked about my being more trouble than the ten-year-old. But in the back of my mind, there was embarrassment lurking! Thanked her in the usual fashion, and she was off, back to her bed and, hopefully, some much-needed sleep.
The new DVT Anticoagulant Therapy Record was found by accident. It had fallen underneath the Carers table.
Got some updating done on the computer on this blog, then the getting together all the things needed for today’s trip. The took a grip as I was readied to go. So many checks and rechecks were carried out, keeping an eye on the time. I did not want to miss the EasyLink minibus again. This photo on the left, I took earlier and forgot to put it on the blog. It is of the Carer’s table. I was so glad to avoid a painfully vicious and bruised bloody battle with . All thanks to helping me with the socks, as well as the Velcro manipulating.
I’ll have to tell you now; to get the embarrassing bit out of the way. I’d made a memory list last night of the things needed for the Riverside visit. Got the things prepared and in pockets or the trolley (I thought).
❶ The driver would not take a tenner and give me £2 change; the money had to be spot-on. So he took all my change again, all the eight-pound coins I had to pay for the lift. This did get to me! All that hassled and Esther getting change for me, and it’s gone in one go! (Fed-Up Grade A style!)
❷ When I got to Bulwell, I found that there was no session today. So, it seems that had to got me again! I was wee’d of with myself, but not as much as usual. (Fed-Up Grade B style!) I decided to just go into Bulwell for a hobble around, feed the duck=ks and birds and inevitably, do some shopping. So, I did!
❸ I lightened up a little when I saw the Mallards were nearby. Got the bird food from the trolley and launched some feed towards the ducks… then went to get the camera from my pocket… which was not in the pocket! Searched the other pockets and in the trolley… No! I’d left it in the flat! Self-hatred and disgust flowed!
❹ Now I could be in bigger trouble. The reminder for the cash card number was in the camera! I wanted to get some treats for the nurses and carers and have a shop in Wilko. The last time when I used my card in Bulwell, the bank would not accept the pinless transactions, and if this happens again, I’m in a pickle cause I can’t remember the number. Fingers crossed!
I fed the birds. I’d have loved to try photographing them, they were all around my feet, and I would have had a good chance of taking some great shots; had I not forgotten to take the Lumix with me! Grrr! No doubt about it, is giving me bother today!
Visited the Wilko store. I did get some stuff today for a change. Two bottles of the Y-Lang fabric freshener, a roll of sellotape (Needed to stick up reminder notes and medication changes). A bottle of Y-Lang-scented laundry wash. Having never used this Wilko store before, I just went to the first set of check-outs and lined the queue. I didn’t realise it was a Card-Only and Self-Service setup! I did feel like a demented fool waiting for someone to serve me!Then I realised that I am demented! A kind lady assistant came to me cause I imagine I may have looked like a lost old soul, and explained things to me. Things got worse, me-in-muddle-wise! She helped me put them through, and she went back to her post. When I was putting the things in the bag, I realised I had not paid for the sellotape! She must have been watching me and come to my rescue again! I had to swipe the tape through and pay with the card, which I didn’t think it would allow, not for… I can’t remember the exact price, but it was around 50p, I think. Tsk! Out I went and visited the Vegan store to see if they had any of the imitation belly pork slices I got last week, and I liked the taste. They had two kinds today. Last week I bought four, for just over £2. I asked for two of each this time… expecting a similar charge… £8.20!!! I realised after I’d left that this took all of my remaining money to pay for it. Good job I paid for both ways on the EasyLink bus, or I would have had t walk the four-miles home! I dropped into the Pound Land shop on the way back to the collection point for the bus. Saw they had some Walnuts and almonds in small packets, so got some of them, also a small bag of seeds to feed the birds en route to the Riverside Complex. I really wish I had paid more attention to the price stickers when I selected these nuts. For when I got to the checkout, the girl said, “That’ll be eight pounds ninety-six, please!” WHAT? I dared not use the card, and the people behind in the queue were getting agitated with waiting! The girl called someone to keep an eye on me, fearing I may do a runner? And pointed to a cash machine where I could get some money. Could I remember my card pin, though? I went to the machine; I’d never seen such a small one like it before. I asked the lady when she’d finished using it, apologising first for bothering her, which way the card goes in. She stayed with me, bless her, and went through it with me. When it came to putting in the number… believe it or not, a four-digit number came into my mind from somewhere in the ether. A flash prayer, and I put it in, and it worked! The mini-machine only allowed £40 to be withdrawn. I thanked the lady customer so much for helping me and whatever entity it was that gave me the number needed! Can I remember it now? Nope! I hobbled half the length of the store to join the check-out queue again, so I could pay for the overpriced nuts!
Arrived at the checkout, paid up belatedly and out to feed the ducks again. While chatting with the mallards and pigeons fighting for their share of the seeds, I thought I would be able to have a go at the crossword puzzle book while waiting for the list in the Riverside… I hadn’t taken a pen with me! I had a search around all my pockets and the trolley, nope, no pen! I hobbled back to Bulwell Market and bought a pack of pens. Returned to the car park entrance at Riverside, got sat down, and enjoyed a long session on the crosswording. (Not that I was not very successful, mind you!) The minibus arrived spot on time. We took a convoluted route (Roadworks) back to the flats, but at least it didn’t cost any extra this time. Back at the flats, I asked the driver if he could ask his office to ring Deana about arranging payment by a debit system for me, telling him of the difficulties in getting the right money every time I use the . I didn’t hear his answer. Gave him a choice of drinkies from the trolley bag, in thanks, and struggled up with three bags hanging onto the three-wheeled walker trolley, to the flat.
Hunger being a new desire, I got whatever they were supposed to be vegan slices in the oven. Then wondered if I’d locked the door instead of leaving it open for the carer coming. I went to check… And found a letter marked ‘Private’ and ‘Urgent’. I’ll open it after having the meal. Which has to be given tags, and this they are: &! The chops looked like real meat, and smelt it cooking? I got some BBQ beans heating up.
I got the meal served up on the tray, added a large bap and pot of the short-dated orange yoghourt that Carer Richard found in the fridge and went through the routine; it took a while. It tasted alright, indeed nice. However, as I was tucking into it, something hard crunched against the already damaged and broken back double molar, and it joined the beans in my mouth! With horrible crude black segments inside of the tooth. It left jagged bits still in the upper gum, sharp and nasty tasting when the tongue ran over it. Next time I go to Bulwell, I shall inform the sellers! The orange yoghourt tasted a little sour to me, but it was on its last sell-by day. So, I’ll throw the other ones away.
I spat out the chomped-chop and checked on the contents before continuing to eat; there was something hard that broke the tooth. But not as I assumed, a bone, more like a chunk of plastic, I thought? When I find it… if I find it, I’ll take it with me to the store. When I was examining it, looking at it with the spy-glass, the at just the wrongs time, it shot out of hand. I think I heard it ping as hit something or other and disappeared into the ether? Carer Richard is good at finding things; if I don’t come across it, I’ll ask Richard to have s look for it for me on Monday. I’ll likely find it by treading on it with my bare feet as I walk around.
The chops were tasty enough, just potentially lethal. Hehehe! Very carefully, I ate the nearly cold remainder with the beans. Not counting the bloodied mouth, loss of the tooth, and pain it caused, I still gave this meal a flavour rating of 7.2/10! On taste only. Not the taste of the rotting tooth, you understand? Hehehe! That was terrible!
I got the pots washed, and the tooth saved. Had a quick search for the plastic that was in the food (If it was plastic), and then bravely opened the ‘Private letter’. No luck, of course. The letter was from the QMC (Queens Medical Centre) regarding my Cataract operation… with a confirmation of an appointment to have it done! The date is on Wednesday, 9th November 2022, at 09:30hrs! On my first reading of the letter, I fear that between my , , Arithmophobia, , , , , with the help of Glaucoma Gladys, brought on stabbing pains from , thus, severe mode, was automatical engaged. – Not a lot is more disturbing than going into a Panic-Mode. You can’t do anything about it, can’t get to grips with sorting it out, and fear and frustration flourish! With Duodenal Donald and Anne Gyna both giving you discomfort, it was a waste of time trying to make sense of the eight pages of instructions that lay in front of me. But of course, I tried. I had to, but knew I should have left it until later when help was available! These things never fail to arrive at the weekend. When there are no ILCs on site. I have to stew, fret and panic until Monday. Then sometimes, I can’t get in touch with Deana. Fair enough, she is up to the neck and so busy looking after us all.
I loved it when I could do things for myself without bothering them at all. But Vascular Dementia Doreen’s arrival has put an end to that. I wonder if it’s worth it, carrying on. It’ll only get worse. This thought then sank me down, and I loathe getting into a .
rang out. came in. He looked so tired; bless him. It must have been about 19:20hrs; it must have been his last call. He gave me the medications and listened to my sad pathetic tales of the day. That was good of him. The poor carers are the only people I can tell. I insisted he take his choice of plonk in thanks for his tired time. Reluctantly he took one. Such a nice lad is Jozeph. He took the waste bags with him on his way out.
and my depression combined to ensure that sleep was not an option for many hours, gone 02:00hrs. I got three hours in, though. Before bursting jumpingly awake at 05:00hrs, with a desperate need of the Porcelain Throne… but, did I make it in time? Dang, dang dang, danggg!
At 02:00hrs, I burst awake with a twitch, tremor, and judder. The reactivation of my brain cells concentrating only on what it was that awoken me so abruptly. Within a minute, I’d risen, struggling like an elephant would, and as on my feet, Wooden Walter (the walking stick) in hand, and had a look around every room nook and cranny; to find the root cause of my rude awakening. Nothing untoward was found! Maybe I was dreaming, and something happened that shook me awake? No, not likely, is it? As I investigated in the kitchen, the early morning sly caught my attention, and I fetched the Lumix to take these shots. Although they were disappointingly poor, the top one has Venus in it. My cyber buddy Tim in New Mexico, a brilliant photographer, tells me that Venus is brighter at the moment. It’s just a shame I am not bright enough to take decent photos anymore. You can hardly see the planet at all, but even to my cataracted eyes, it shone out like a bright pin in the darkness. But not on the Lumix. But it didn’t bother me much.
I got the done while my mind was still working.
The figures were all recorded and transferred to the NHS analysing site. Still up in the Hypertension Red area. In fact, the SYS: 169 and DIA 78 resulted in my being in Hypertension-2? But that is better than the previous two days’ checks. They were in Hypertension 3+ – then 3, so they seem to be coming downwards, now at Hyper – 2!
Mind you, the body temperature was virtually spot on!
Got on with updating the Wednesday blog and got it done by about 05:00hrs. Which was quick; I fear I may have missed something off; that helped time-wise but not news-wise. Hehehe!
I visited at 05:20hrs, then 6:20, and the third one at 07:40hrs. All calm since, but things can change. Har-har!
Did some Pinteresting of photos. Then had a right farce with creating the CorelDraw graphics. Freezing, foreign to me messages coming up in code of some sort. I just crossed my fingers and waited, sometimes for far too long, and it stuttered back to responding each time. But when I went on Word to create the daily ode, that was toying with me as well. The darned thing was changing things as I was typing more?
I was getting more and more uptight.
arrived as I was just going on for the fourth time to the Porcelain Throne. But each visit is pain, blood and effort-free! ! Richard was so tired-out, bless him. His last shift of this session. The lad needed some R&R. He checked the dates on some foodstuffs when I asked him to. He took a carrier bag of fodder to the waste chute with the normal bags as he left. And his bag of treats in thanks.
Got some spuds in the slow cooker, seasoned with sea salt and Balsamic vinegar. Black pepper and a splash of the Hickory Liquid Smoke.
Got the can of the 400g Princes Plant Based Mexican Bean style chilli in the saucepan. It smelt a little too strongly seasoned for my tastes. So, I added plenty of tomato passata and some of the 7-veg roasted Mediterranean sauce.
Warmed it and tried a spoonful… is not going to take to this… Way too hot for me, even with the sauces. So as a last effort, I added some of the distilled vinegar, stirred it well on to saturate through and turned off the heat.
Pressed on with this blog until Esther arrived. She went through my pockets to look for money again when I told her I was struggling to find coins to pay for the EasyLink bus in the morning. She took £20 and went off to see if she could get some change for me. She returned later with ten pounds in change and a tenner. That saved the day!
Checked on the meal – Disaster! Just too hot for me to cope with. I threw it away, washed the pots and started again on another meal.
A can of ‘All Day Breakfast. The one that Carer Richard found to be almost out of date on his checks this morning. I added half of the jar of 7-Roasted Mediterranean Vegetable sauce and nothing else… Oh! sorry, I did put some tomato passata with basil in as well. The substituted curly fries by Asda were crap! Rubbish! But I managed to eat most of the other stuff. A taste-Rating of 6.5/10 was given, but I may have been a smidge over-generous. Back to rice tomorrow? Oh! I might be able to get some of the imitation belly pork when I go to Bulwell in the Morning? We’ll see! I’ve got to see if I can be there in time and not forget about catching the EasyLink bus first.
Life with in your brain is not easy… Your best-laid plans mean nothing! Frustrations, failures, and Depression is guaranteed! I put the nearly eaten meal in the kitchen, and fatigue hit me; no choice other than get sit down and accept the upcoming sleep that the body is demanding.
Burst forth and roused me from the sweet dream I was having, and my brain was struggling with the rude awakening. I lay there waiting for the to come in. No one did? So, I hauled my hippopotamus-like but wobbly frame up from the recliner, and I went to investigate. I had left the door locked? I must have locked it after Esther left? It was arriving. I apologised for locking him out. The lad was okay and looked a little tired but soon got the medications sorted out. He was soon off, taking the waste bag with him to the chute and a cold drink from the fridge in thanks.
I resettled in the £300, bought eight years ago from the second-hand shop, Harold Haemorrhoid testing, repugnantly beige-coloured, crumb containing, virus-breeding, acne-giving, rickety, itch-producing, none-working recliner. And woke up nearly five hours later, much refreshed at 01:00hrs.
I had slept for seven hours! Yes! Mind you, my body and feeble brain needed it! No question about that. I woke around 03:30hrs, disgruntedly requiring a wee-wee. Which was just as well cause it woke me up properly, and I knew I had a lot of catching up to do on the blog.
The wee-wee was of the rare for me nowadays, SP (Short-Powerfull) type. I cannot say the same about the annoying, time-consuming CM (Cessational Micturitional) after-dribbling. A good job I took the three-pronged Metal Mickey walking stick with me to the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket). By the time I got around to taking off the night attire, I’d forgotten all the things I had laid there thinking needed doing! A good start to disrobing as well. The moment I realised I had double-knotted the waist cord, the innards summoned me to the . So, I went to the Throne. The solidity of the evacuating product has never been so resistant to move before as it was this morning! Well, no, that’s a fib; I’m sorry! There was one as bad; as the last time, I ate some sweetcorn, as I recall. Some years ago now, when I discovered that sweetcorn blocked me up. It was put on the ‘do not eat’ list by Dr Vindla. The only thing I can think of, as there may have been ground sweetcorn in the meatless chilli I had for tea last night? A shame cause I enjoyed it. Better not risk having it again. Continued: I spent ages on the crossword book. Did rather better today, I got five more answers filled in. Giving off the odd verbal ‘ueek’, ‘argh’, and ‘oh-oh-oh’ as I braved trying to push things along. But it didn’t help anyway. Only 36 cracks were found in the ceiling today; I thought there were 43 last week? I topped up the olive-oil dropper from the bottle. Had it not been for the pain, I may have dropped off back to sleep on the Throne. Took a battering. Could have been worse, though. At least it wasn’t a torpedo that emerged. A few golfball-sized concrete-like escapees, instead, this time. A great relief!
I went back to get dressed and noticed the reminder for next week I’d stuck on the high bookcase. I’m on form today. Fancy me noticing something. Hehehe! If I can keep going like this, maybe I could scare of Dementia Doreen? Fat chance, but a wonderful idea!
As I started to get Richard’s treats collated, a noticed something else. And I weakened when I saw the rather delightful-tasting Toffifees box… and I nicked one of them from the packet. Guilty! No defence! Hang him! I seem to be feeling a little perkier now? Off to the kitchen to get them in a bag and make another mug of tea! Thompson’s Punjana this time. And jolly nice it was too!
I noticed a third thing as well… Oh, Yes! The view outside looked almost like a water painting to me. I love it like this. So, I got the Lumix, set it on the Landscape option. And took these photos of it. The top one was to the right of the window, the second one straight ahead, and the third to the left.
Chimed out, and in walked . It was so nice to see him. He’s been talking with his Meridian Management about my problems.Nice that the lad cares. He soon got the medications sorted, and we had a jolly good nattering session. But all good things have to come to an end. Hehe! Picked his bags up, selected some plonk, and off he went. Not before time, I think, ’cause he was yawning a bit… well, a lot, poor lad.
Walked him to the door and waved him off, and returned to the computer. Got stuck into updating and posting off of the Tuesday blog. Dedicated, I was on a mission! Gorrit done, as well.
Then the world changed. The lights dimmed as Anne Gyna, who, let’s be fair, has been good to me for several days – returned with a vengeance. Virtually crippling my concentration, and the blogging just had to stop. I’ll turn off the computer and try to get something to eat, have a sit-down and see how I go on with that. This is not good… But I’ve had worse. Back in a bit.
It’s morning now, and I am playing catch-up again. Memory is not with me, used memory notes alone. So not detailed overly details from here on.
Woken by . Did meds and picked drinkies from the fridge. Took waste bags with him. Got the nosh made; however, it was a new worst-ever effort!. I was still half-asleep, I think. Gawd knows what I did with the mashed potatoes; they were stone cold? The small potatoes were just about eatable. The sausages, gravy and onions were tepid, the vegan burger warm but dried… I just don’t know what I got up to in preparing this meal. Even the tomatoes were bitter? I ate the small potatoes and tried each of the other ingredients, but none were edible. What a farce! Taste Rating; -2/10! Horrible!
I can’t recall taking any of these shots of the evening view at all. But the pots had been washed when I got up in the morning. And judging by the squelchy heavy feel of the waste bags. It looks like I’d once again put the uneaten meal, drained it into several bags and then a big one to prevent any leakages.
I think what little, which really wasn’t much at all that I had eaten, was soon coming back as stomach ache within minutes of getting back down in the £300, used, second-hand shop bought nine years ago, c1966, discomfiting, alarmingly Karki-beige coloured, crumb containing, TV remote hiding, not working recliner, and the guts started grinding away. So, once again, getting to sleep was not easy. I got up to take some Peptac, and it was then I noticed how clean I’d left the kitchen sink area. Pots all washed, surfaces wiped, pots away… Can anyone tell me when I did this, cause I’m confounded about when I did it?
ODE TO LIVING A LIFE THAT’s DUFF
Life without Dementia Doreen, can be hard enough, But with her, you’ve got to be tough! Living is full of confusion, fear and bluff… At low times, I can think I’ve had enough… Especially now, when things are rough, This morning I was feeling very gruff… Bald as a coot, I now find I’ve got dandruff!
I didn’t get any sleep at all. Didn’t even try to. Various reasons, Thought-Storms, Anne Gyna and frustrations niggling at me from within my own brain. I use the term brain, loosely!Mostly over my concerns over the timing of, or did I order, the EasyLink transport for the visit to the Doctors to get the results of the Severe Frailty Test. This left me confused and frustrated, and things only worsened as the day of confusion and error-making moved on. On the computer for many hours. Not that much got done. The concentration was again lackadaisical.
I got the done around 02:00hrs.
When I put the results through the NHS calculator online, well… What the heck happened here?
The highest it has ever been since I began using the site!
I’ve never been as high as this. I was in the Hypertension 3+ zone!
All the same, I was not too worried. I put it down to worry over the weekend. As usual, no help was available. Even if any ILCs (Wardens) had been on site, there was no guarantee that I could have contacted them.Anyway, even if I could, they could not contact Easy-Link, who do not work over the weekend, to verify the arrival time of the lift. I felt the tension and an uptightness, and Anne Gyna has been at me again, although not as bad as last week before the medications had been doubled.
I made the first mug of tea I’d had for over eleven hours. Not me at all! Mind you, after this brew, the old tea addiction returned.
Took this snap of the morning view. But didn’t appreciate it at all; I was still fretting (and EQ told me things were going to go ape-shit) over the lift arrangements and appointment time. Nothing positive, you understand, just this sense that I had somehow put them down wrong in the calendar.
The computer turned off, and I went off to the wet room. Not that I can remember much about it, but I think it went well. Made a second mug of tea, Co-op 99 this time.
We had a chat, some of it dedicated to ways of making things easier for me to grasp. The usual laughs and natter were granted by Richard. Not sure if we put the world to rights or not today. Hehe!
My memory notes a sparse for some reason… and unreadable in parts as well. Rich took the bags to the bin with him on his way out. Usual Monday thank-you treats were given. Oh, yes, I remember now; Richard helped me get the in-the-ear hearing aids going to use today; bless him.
I got myself and the things needed for the Doctor’s visit ready, and I was struggling through the door with the three-wheeled walker when I heard the phone ringing. I battled my way back inside, bruising my knee on the trolley and on the wheel. All the time, a voice (EQ), telling me not to answer it, you’re doing wrong! But I thought it might be the surgery or EasyLink phoning, so I got back and had to answer it. It was Sister Jane. Telling me about the Sun & Mon merging today. Of course, with all the concern over the bus and appointment timing, I was in a mini-panic in case I missed the bus. I forgot all about it until the morning when it was too late. I felt bad about that. After Jane had taken the bother to let me know as well. Sorry, Jane! ♥
Unfortunately, although I didn’t realise it at the time, this was just enough delay for me to miss the bus! EQ was right again. Why don’t I listen to him?
Faffed about in a hurry now, stubbing the same toe again. Down to the lift lobby.
I went through to the main lobby, and it was 5 past 10. I thought the bus was due at 10:15hrs, so had plenty of time after all. But no bus arrived.
I waited ten more minutes and then walked to the ILC (Independent Living Coordinators), Oberstgrüppenfuhrer, Warden and Primo Ballerina, Warden Deana & Generaloberstess, Ice skating champion florist and Warden Julie’s holding-cell office. Through the ether, an audible, almost physical voice screamed at me, “Argh, it’s him again!” Haha! Julie phoned Easy-Link to see about the bus. Now I knew I’d just missed it by five minutes! Damn-it! Will I ever get to this appointment? Julie called the Doctor and got a new appointment made for me, bless her cotton socks. This one is for Tuesday, 1st November 2022, at 10:20hrs. Then she rang EasyLink again to confirm a lift to get there, but none to come back, as I just did not know how long I would be at the appointment. Thanked her. Coming out of the holding-cell office.
I bumped into Carer Richard. I was a little tense and so tired and disappointed at things going wrong yet again that I can’t recall exactly what we said during our chinwag in the Winwood lobby.
I went back to the flat along the link passage, into the flat, and got the timings clearly on the Google Calendar for the next Doctor’s meeting.
Deana had written a note for me to keep as a reminder as well. I cello-taped that to the end of the high bookcase.
At least I get some kip in now; surely, this would not be a problem after being up for 28 hours on the to now?
I’m certain, sure that I took a photograph of the Chilli-Not-Carne meal. Four Cumberland sausages I cooked, well, nigh on incinerated, by giving them a good 12-extra minutes or more in the oven. Had to chisel them out of the tray to get them on top of the dish. But the photo was not on the Lumix SD card. I can’t understand why, but in the morning, when it came to updating this blog, blow me, there the photo was? Mind you, it was one of the worst photos I’ve ever taken. Still, it shows the burned sausages and disgusting-looking chilli. Yet I enjoyed it. A taste rating of 7.2/10 was given to it. The sausages? 9.2/10 even though they’d been cauterised! Hehehe! Put the tray on the Carer’s table, and .
Woke me up an hour or so later. And I really was deep in sleep. So much so that I think my first greetings came out as gibberish and waffle! It took me until getting the medications and seeing the Warfarins in the pot to realise it was not morning but nighttime and that I’d only been kipping for an hour. Hehe! I came around a bit and offered Carolynne a cold drink from the fridge. Had to go to the door with her as she collected the waste bags for me, said my farewells and locked the door.
I got back down in the £300, second-hand, c1968, charity shop-bought, eyesorely-horrendously grungy coloured, Harold Haemorrhoid-testing, easily-falloutable from, unfit-for-use, not working, recliner, and was back in the land of nod within a minute I reckon. I slept for another seven hours! Yes! Mind you, my body and feeble brain needed it! Hurrah!
After roughly four hours of kip, I was jolted, mentally-viciously awake at 02:00hrs. I spent the next three hours or so trying to get back to sleep. It was very frustrating as it had taken me hours to get to sleep in the first place. But it didn’t bother me much at all. At 05:30ish, the need for a wee-wee forced me to abandon my plans to get back to sleep. Not that it mattered, there was not a chance of it happening, thanks to Sweet Morpheus being in a bad mood with me again.
By the time I’d got myself onto my feet and caught my balance, I’d decided to get the done. I divested the jammies, and gathered the clothes needed to put on, and limped to the wet room. Things went very well. I even managed to get the socks on without having to battle, one which I was bound to lose against . In this photo, I was resting painfully with my right leg on the WC seat. You wouldn’t believe the again I went through to get it up there! Did you see the Deep vein thrombosis veins had started to appear again? I’ll mention this when the DVT Nurse comes again. I can show her this picture… Of course, it’ll drive her passion again for me; when she sees them, her eyes will twinkle, and she’ll move closer to me and have a feel… Hehehe!
Well, even I realised after the ablutionalisationing session was over; I’m been exceptionally lucky this morning, and I really had, mate. had not attacked me at all, and I’d been up and about for over an hour by then! No Dizzies, walking into anything. (although it would not be too long until I did, and more than once!) Not dropping anything (Ah, I did drop the toothbrush, sorry). was noticeable by her absence, but were not too bad… (mind you, I haven’t dropped anything on them or stubbed a toe yet) and no… I’d better not mention anything else, don’t want to push my luck. I went into the kitchen, and I took a photo of the view from the window. I doctored it later to this shape. Not too bad a job either. He says… Sorted some waste bags out. Took all four to the waste chute. It’s funny how I suddenly had so many? A ? Have I spoken too soon?
Got a text from Iceland telling me they had been forced to make substitutions. Fancy that! I got the started, and made up these graphics with the results. Look at that! A near-perfect body temperature resulted for today. I had a feeling that I was doing too well, you know!
The SYS & DIA combined and were in the Hypertension Red zone again, so, no surprise there, then.
The 7-Day Excel record is looking betterer, but it still confuses me how they allot the colours?
I was working merrily away on CorelDraw, and it had another blip! They stand-need to tell me the price has increased!. It started freezing again, but I waited long enough on three occasions, and it did start once more. I’m not sure how much longer it will last?
arrived as I was putting some potatoes into the crock-pot. Soon got the medications sorted out for me. Then I had him in tucks, telling him about the trousers dropping down on Sunday. Hehe!
Unfortunately, but not unexpectedly for me, as we were going along the corridor, I clouted my elbow on the funny bone on the closet door! Richard’s face lit up, and laughter broke out. He said: “I wonder why they call it the funny bone,
I walked him to the door, and we parted, both of us laughing. I even gave him a thumbs-up sign as he disappeared through the end flat lobby door, and then, still smiling with pleasure, I went back into the flat…
And fell arse-over tit when I tripped against the three-wheeler-trolley guide. I ended up a flobby mass of a dishevelled pensioner… the worst bit was hitting my head against the radiator on the way down, then bounced in a fashion sideways, hitting my right shoulder on the opposite wall, rolling into the towel airer, knocking it flying! Ending up with a leg bent underneath my body mass, the other stuck through the tubes on the fallen heater!
I went on hands and knees to the recliner and got myself up again. That was enough work for me for a day or two! Hahaha! After cleaning myself up, Phorpain Gelling the shoulder, and Germoleneing the forehead, I got back to the memory notepad to write my experiences to go on today’s blog. That is if I ever get Sundays finished first!
The intercom flashed, and the Iceland delivery arrived.
The delivery man threw the things into some carrier’s bags and departed the flats and the boxes. I got the bags into the kitchen.
Very luckily, I remembered the potatoes bubbling away in the crock pot, and I turned them off. Always the hero I am! Very strongly in this case! “Shurrup!” Alto-Ego; No, I won’t!
Unloaded the items. The strawberries were part of the Warden’s treats. I’ll take them down with the other stuff this afternoon.
The burgers, which are the favourites of Carer Richard, and be given to him each day so he doesn’t overeat. Hahaha!
The treats for the Carers were hidden from view, so they will be a surprise when they get them offered to them.
I got back to the computer, and I had an email from Asda. Thinking it was about Wednesday’s order and/or substitutes, I opened it to investigate.There were three substitutions and two not available. ! The order is coming today, not Wednesday! Now my spirits sank a bit. When I realised I’d made another bloomer. Then… The intercom went. The DVT Haematology Nurse, Hristina, had arrived. Now, I expect you will think that I either forgot or got the date wrong for this blood-taking session? Me? Well, yes, you’d be right! Hristina is an Angel. I have two Angels, one in the UK and one beauty in the US of A. She is Lisa-Petal, HRH (Her Royal Highness), or Sweetheart, and I’ve never met her. Yet she keeps me going. HRH and Hristina are like each other in many ways. Billum, HRH’s hubby, is my Cyber-Buddy
Gonna have to rush this, it’s getting late, so I’ll type in shorthand – Hehehe! I was looking out of the kitchen window at the rain and the Asda delivery man arrived next.
He was throwing things a great distance to get crushed, broken or misshapen! Got them stored away. I struggled to get everything in the fridge and freezer.
I tried ringing Deana and Julie the wardens, to see if they were in so I could take the treats down to them. They are always busy, but Mondays are horrendous for them. This is why I thought I’d ordered their bits for Wednesday. Tsk! No answers and I had no room to put them in the fridge either, so I went down hoping to find them.
Down in the lift and through the Winwood Court link passage. The office in Winwood’s foyer looked to be closed and locked up.
So I meandered into the Winwood Social and had a nosey around.
Got to the other end, and I turned back
This is on the third photo down.
Looks nice, doesn’t it?
Not many folks around, though.
I caught Julie coming back to the office and gave her the carrier bags. She looked busy, so I didn’t stop for a natter. Much as I wanted to.
Back into Woodthorpe Courts, in the lift lobby and back to flat number 72. I thought it best, with me lining there.
Worked away at this blog for several hours. It was slow-going, error-ridden etc.
Arrived and got the medications sorted. We had a little chinwag of sorts, and she asked about the Sever Frailty Test results. I’d forgotten about the bus fare change again! I’ve a tenner and some change but not enough for the trip. I asked Jodie what I could do, but between us, nothing matured. I asked her to remind me to ask Deana if she could look into the chance of me paying monthly with my card. Too late for tomorrow, but if she could set it up, it’ll be a load off of my mind.
I had a look at the squashed and damaged ready meals I’d bought. I quite fancied the Vegan Chilli-Non-Carne.
But the time was late, and I was tired and frustrated. I ended up having a veg pastie and a few of the potatoes from the slow cooker.
Not the most inspiring of meals. Nor the best tasting. But it did me.
I know that I’m not going to get to sleep again tonight. I’m too uptight at myself for all the mistakes I’ve made; the main one, at this moment, is not sorting out the money to pay for the lift to the Doctor’s for the results of the Severe Frailty Test in the morning.
I’m sorry, but Carer Jodie has just been, and it’s so late. She reminded me about the Doctors in the morning. I think the clout on my head has affected me. Too late for me to sort out the cash for the lift. I’ll see if the Wardens can help me in the morning before I leave.
I really hope I can get some sleep. I need it badly. But Anne Gyna is still going away at me, worry about the money situation, and even the bruise on my head is stinging more now.
No sleep allowed again. I got up and carried on with this blog, then posted it off around 02:00hrs.