INCHY: Thursday 10th August 2023 – An inextricable confusing day!

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So many hassles and ailments today…
Anything I tried to do, trouble got in the way!
The left leg kept collapsing… vulnerability?
The hospital doctor mentioned cerebropathy...
Thought when I get home, look it up straight away!
But Virgin Media did not want to play!
It kept going down for the rest of the day!
Shuddering Shoulder Shirley attacked at midday,
But she didn’t have it all her own way…
Shaking Shaun joined in: lackaday!
Balance walking, wobbly, made me feel giddy,
No time for my blogging & wordsmithery,
My DVT nurse comes tomorrow to take my blood away,
She rang me to ask what time of day ♥,
The opticians rang, I couldn’t hear what she did say…
What sanity I have, was drifting away…
EENT Clinic rang, about the operation day,
There may be some sort of delay…
Social Services are coming on Monday…
I don’t know what for, they didn’t say,
The Mobility Team on Wednesday…
DVT Anticoagulant rang; booked me into the faculty?
Sister Jane rang me, we were very chatty…
3 visits to the Porcelain Throne, they were whiffy!
Iceland delivered food, that costs pounds, over fifty!
Wen t to get things done ablutionary,
No hot water; the tap was dripping away!
The whole day was wrong, contrary…
Things seemed unreal, delusionary,
Still, no time to start the blog diary,
22:00hrs I started on the one for Wednesday,
There were always things diversionary…
I soon got feeling weary & wary…
My mind got into a bigger disarray,
Thoughts were going all over, thataway, thereaway,
I never want to suffer such an abominably, bad day…

Like I suffered this bloody Thursday!
Nearly midnight now, still need a shower someway,
Do the teggies, shave, change the catheter..
.
Eye drops, Germoloid the piles and basically…
Get some sleep; hoping Friday will go less diabolically!
And my body will act less dysfunctionally…
The brain too, the day goes less eventfully
And, Cognitive Impairment Iris, plays favourably,

All day I’ve not eaten anything gastronomically,
I’ve just been so damned up-to-the-neck busy.
I’ll put some potatoes in the oven, quickly…
Do the needed tasks ablutionary,
I’m feeling better already…
I’m doing this ode, quite lyrically?
And face my problems bravely,

Not moaning, groaning or snivelly!
The upcoming appointments, medically,
Only the one that’s neurophysiologically,
I’ll approach a little nervously,
Funny how I’ve cheered up suddenly…
Not bad, cause I’ll be showering nocturnally,
I’ll cope with things philosophically…
I’ll check what that means in my dictionary!

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Worra Blooming Day!

Up at 05:10hrs.

The night Bag was removed.
Not a lot of it, and dark coloured too! Am I surprised? Then yes, not after the nightmare day, though!.

Waste bags sorted.

The was better!

First mug of Glengettie!

Computer on.
But not for long.

The intercom flashed as I got the spuds out of the drawer.
Aha, the Iceland food arrived to restock the freezer from my in leaving the door open for nine hours! Three bags of food were destroyed. Tsk!
The driver kindly carried the bags into the kitchen for me.
As I was getting the frozen things in the freezer first…
The watch strap broke. So I put it down on the counter, and continued to get the food in the freezer sharpishly!
Biscuits Galore. Not for me of course; they are for the Carers and nurses due Friday and next week.

Coffees (For the carers of course), Rustlers for Carer Richard. Potatoes and bread for me

The freezer filled once again!

Naughties?
Savoury nibbles in the plastic ottoman.

The phone started ringing almost nonstop for hours.
Nurses, Carers, Social Services, Fall Team, Optician, Sister Jane, and others. The computer was not touched again until late evening… but by 21:00hrs, Had amassed no less than…

The second and last mug of tea, Thompsons Punjana this time, was being gulped down with three shortcake biscuit sticks. No, I’m not kidding, just three!

I got a new strap on the wristwatch.

The Days Sky Photos.
All from roughly the same spot at the kitchen window.
Good Morning
Good later Morning
Good Afternoon
Late Afternoon.
Sunset One
Late Sunset Two…
Bootiful!
Early Morning

Now I’ll try to get a meal made.
Potatoes in the oven, and thought I’d change the night bag and get the ablutions done. But I .
So, got the burnt potatoes out of the oven… buttered the potatoes unsparingly, and added some yellow tomatoes, with a lemon dessert for afters.
Scoffed it all up. Flavour-Rating 7.5/10
And fell asleep again…

Cheers Middears!

 

Inchy’s WP Prompt 2020 Reply: 30 Things that make me happy!

1) Waking up alive!
Although this is often ignored when waking up with some of my ailments giving me some stick. Finding the catheter has been leaking again! , or I was in the middle of a, and on my way to the floor, as I slip from the clutches of the c1966, £300 charity shop bought, second-hand, wincingly grotty, beige coloured, not working, crumb-covered from the nocturnal nibblings, itch-making, uncomfortable, virus breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, recliner.
2) The rare times when I can get to sleep – without it being purgatory from the
Excellent when these leave me alone!

3) Waking up without a rattlingly vicious attack by
More often than not, resulting in another toppling out of the c1966, £300 pound, second-hand charity-shop bought, crumb-containing, odour-retaining, Harold’s Haemorrhoid-testing, nauseatingly beige coloured, non-working, virus-breeding recliner.

4) Not leaving the taps (faucets) running.
Floods, hot water running cold, hours spent cleaning up the mess. The Water-Alarm goes off, informing the Nottingham City Homes Monitoring Control, who ring me on the alarm panel box in the front room, but I cannot hear what they are saying, as I am in the wet room or kitchen at the time cleaning up. Then I go into the front room to inform them of my Accifauxpa and that I’m dealing with it.

5) When Shaving Goes Well!
I think the average cuts acquired when shaving would average around 4. I’m as bald as a badger on my head, yet hair grows behind my ear holes and neck?

6) Any Day When I Don’t Take a Tumble.
I have acquired a habit lately of bashing my head on the way down. Usually on the sharp corner of a counter or ledge. With the odd few that have left me unconscious. The last one, when the leg lost all neurotransmitters sensation, I twisted and landed on my back – not sure if I blanked out for a few seconds… As I regained a modicum of reality, the Nottingham Home Alarm Monitor Control lady talked to me over the alarm box. Her voice sounded slightly panicky, and communication was even worse this time. As I could not get back up, so I had a chance to hear what she was saying clearly. The leg had blown up to tree-trunk size, the pain too much at that time for me to try to get up, and the lady told me she was ringing for an ambulance for me. Over four hours later, the lady checked on me again. Then I made a massive pain-bearing effort as the leg was going down a little; I crawled slowly to the £300, second-hand, musty, Haemorrhoid Harold Testing, cringingly beige, crumb-covered, not-working, rickety recliner, and used it get myself up on my feet! The lady cancelled the ambulance. I got carried away there a bit… Sorry!

7) Any Day When Does Not Go Down
But, this, of course, is an impossibility!
The last day when this miracle of the none-failure was many months ago. Since then the
have had a 100% daily failure rating.
Today, they cocked it up five times in 2 hours!

8) Any Day When I do not have a.

9) When I prepare a meal without an Accifauxpa

The tin opener is the biggest offender.
Closely followed by the steak knife and scissors.
cut finger

10) When I Don’t Fall getting on or off a Bus.
Off course, this will include tripping up or down steps and misjudging the distance from hard objects, like door frames, walls, cabinets, lift doors, and in-store

11) When I Don’t take a Fall in the Shower
GC showerNaturally, these events usually are down to one of these…
.
.
or
falling down.

12) When The Health Checks Turn-Out Normal!
But, a rare event!

13) When The Urine Checks are Good!

14) When The Ear Holes Don’t Bleed
Like the photo above, sometimes caused by a shaving behind the lughole’s error. Occasionally at their own behest, for which I have had tests… blood all over my vest…

15) When I Win at Something
Which, of course, is one for the coming future,
I may win one day for blaspheming?
I’m reasonably good at banqueting,
Not cooking or preparing…
Just at eating!
There ought to be a competition for befuddling!
I’d be higher in that than middling!
Not for me, voluntary peeing!
I’m excellent at self-confusing,
But I need the catheter for piddling,
I’d win easily at self-battering!
Experienced in chitchatting, complicating, & contradicting,
Is that a victory, my stopping smoking?
Or even my going tea-totalling?
I’m pretty good at jesting…
Also, at failing, falling, fumbling and flailing?
My failures I should be defenestrating…
But I’ll still be worrying whilst waiting!

16) When I Pass Wind Without Escapages!
They usually come out smelling atrocious…
Often the farts emitted can be exhaustless,
The accompanying wind was almost blizzardous!
The results for the protection pants are calumnious!
I have to spray the room with citreous,
The bleeding can look rather dangerous,
That’ll be from the piles and things furunculous,
Mostly the results are not injurious.
The noise it makes can be quite harmonious!

17) When I Go To See The Nurse...

18) When I’m Cooking…
Tomatoes, chips, peas & battered chicken,
I’m happily cooking in the kitchen,
If it comes out wrong, I’m heartbroken!
My spirits are so easy to dampen…
The kitchenette is my playpen…
I get it wrong again and again!
But when it’s good, I’m in heaven.
I eat so much, I am bedridden,
And depression is unforbidden!

19) Casting My Mind Back!
To my days with Grizelda ♥

20) Casting My Mind Back!
Further back to memories of Mother…

21) Casting My Mind Back!

Last week with Deanna.

22) Casting My Mind Back!
A nice gal  I met in the USA. I forget her name…

23) Casting My Mind Back!
Waiting for a job interview as Team Motivator to start.

24) Casting My Mind Back!.
Memories of my first car.

25) Casting My Mind Back!
My walk in the Royal Maze, Liverpool,
Took me five hours to get out; I did feel like a fool!

26) Casting My Mind Back!
GC tooth gumI was happy after I got the message through to me…
Note for Self: “Do Not Lick The Knife”!

27) Casting My Mind Back!
Happy memories of bath time – 1959, revisited in 1969!

28) Casting My Mind Back!
I just returned from the hospital after the six-week Nottingham Residential Home stay. And proudly made my first meal for me in well over three months… weeks. Burnt my hand on the oven shelf. Happily, I learned my
lesson. It was about three weeks before I did this again,

Whoopsiedangleplop!

29) Casting My Mind Back!
Sister Jane escorted me back home after the cancer operation at the QMC Ward 19 operation, and I was released. I got given my notice the following week.

No, really, I was happy about it!

30) Casting My Mind Back!
Sister Jane & Hubby Pete had several kitties.
My personal Favourite is seen here, perusing my pension details.
Taberther!
My other favourite was Mr Phooy.
Both are long gone now. Sob!
But I loved them, and it brings happiness still
to see these photos of them ♥

21, 22, & 23:

In hopes of bringingeth a smile!

INCHIE TODAY: Wednesday 8th February 2023

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Be interesting seeing how they change the catheter. Take my Warfarin Blood Sample, Drain the nest sticky DVT vein, and inject me with Enoxaparin. I’m looking forward to having the next stroke. Hehe!

As I bounded back into imitation life, I remembered I have no  Lumix Camera to use. I tried to last night on the meal and sunset. So, today it gets ignored.  Boy, I’m glad Carer Richard gave me his old Fuji camera. I’ll get some batteries in it. I’ll give it a go later.
I removed and . During which, I observed, felt and swore about that agony the sole (Just under the toes) of my right foot was in! Another new ailment had arrived! No name was given to it, cause I pray it is only going to be a temporary one.
The toes were pale and white, and the boot and ankle looked almost light brown.
When I wriggled the toes, only three of them moved? When I stood up, my balance was all over the place, and the pain, just from the one foot, I classed as a 3-rating. Later in the day, it did ease off – until the evening, around 19:00hrs, then it returned? I was hobbling somewhat.

Carer Richard Came to sort the medications. He told me today was the replacement day for the . I hadn’t any idea… the damned is not easing off. I’ve got the second assessment tomorrow afternoon at the .
Oh, that reminds me, I looked up the FND thought.

Functional neurological disorder – Findings

Functional neurological disorder (FND) describes a problem with how the brain receives and sends information to the rest of the body. It’s often helpful to think of your brain as a computer. In someone who has FND, there’s no damage to the hardware or structure of the brain. It’s the software or programme running on the computer that isn’t working properly.
The problems in FND are going on in a level of the brain that you cannot control. It includes symptoms like arm and leg weakness (Yes) and seizures (No). Other symptoms like fatigue or pain (Yes) – are not directly caused by FND but are often found alongside it. It can cause a range of symptoms, including Problems walking (Yes) – heaviness down one side (Yes) – dropping things (Yes) – feeling like a limb isn’t part of you (Yes). I’ve got all of them. If you have FND, any scans you have will show no damage to the brain to explain the weakness.

Well, I can’t read these above on here, but the spy-glass helped me to. Caused a spell of depression as well afterwards.
I’ll not learn anything about it tomorrow, it’s just another assessment, but in a week or fortnight, I have the first Brain Scan.

Doing the , I had an . I managed to fit in an . No real harm was done.

and I think it was called. The notes on the pad when I got around to doing this bit were of no help at all. A Scrawl!

I must have had for ages; cause hours of the day had been lost. I put this on the list to tell the nurse tomorrow.

I got the batteries in the Fuji camera, and it worked a treat.

I did an order for Ocado for next Wednesday. Then the Asda order that I’d forgotten all about arrived.


The kind driver took them into the kitchen and got them where he could manage to; there was not a lot of room in there.
Damned decent of him.

Anywhere was alright with me.

The guilt… the Guilt! Haha!

Aha, got some washing-up liquid this week.

And to aid my following the nurse’s repeated commands and instructions. I’d got many bottles of spring water in.

Did the evening medicationings.
I waffled on a bit, sorry mate.

Rang to confirm their lift for the afternoon tomorrow. Nice!

Got some sausages and made sarnies with sauce.
Too tired out and stressed to bother making a meal.
Wanted to get it done and eaten before the last
Carer calls to put the on and medicate me. Hehe!
The meal was okayish. Say, a 6/10.

Carer Richard arrived. Did the tasks needed. Had a mini-natter… well, moan from me. Haha! Richard checked the taps and stove, then took the waste bag with him as he departed.

Zzzz!

INCHIE TODAY – Monday 9th January 2023

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Top of the Morning, to yers!

After another night of ever waking up with a jump, never failing to take a moment to work out where I was, I stirred gently back into mock life and realised that the first thing needed was a visit to the . I gleaned this fact from the bubbling innards and warmth of the stomach and rear-end area.
Got to the wet room, yet again, just in time. But that’s a lot better than being too late with all the consequences entailed with that! Hehe!
I cleaned up the pebble-dashed Porcelain and myself and started the complicated job of getting my trousers up past the attached catheter and tubing.
I had not got them up, and a second wave of gooey, sloppy evacuated product arrived. More cleaning up was required; I was getting tired out already. Hahaha!

I got the belated tackled and was well-pleased to see that today was the third in a row of my being in the High-Normal amber zone!


Now, if we can get the Warfarin /DVT INR level up a smidgeon, I can then go into s Super-Smug-Mode. I think that Fridays glitch of shooting up to Hyper-Two, was due to my visiting the Doctor and then the City Hospital Urology appointments?

Time for the first brew of the day. No easing into it with a Punjana… I was feeling pretty good, so delved into a full-on-flavoured mug of the, originally mixed for the Welsh Miners in 1905 by the Thompson family, Glengettie. Great tasting!

I ventured out of the kitchenette window… not too far, cause it was raining a bit. And tool these two pictures of the high in the sky, late morning moon! I was most disappointed with the outcome of them, though.

Determined to make a better effort, I took a shot of the distant horizon.
As you can see, I made a mess of that one too. I must stop wasting valuable time trying to get decent night shots. I’m just not up to it, you know. I took the Night Catheter off.
As I poured the water into the mug, a fourth Porcelain Throne Alert came through. In fact, more than that nearly came through. I took the Night Catheter off.
  So, with the tea left to get cold, I scurried to the wet room…
Despite my best efforts, I could not get the pants down in time. And took total control of the proceedings! All I could do, well apart from swearing and cursing, was to get on with the now familiar job of cleaning things up, putting the pants in a bucket of Dettol, changing the Depends, and getting another pair of trews, giving myself a as I did.

Carer Richard Arrived as I was emptying the day catheter pouch. He was not in a good mood. No one had informed him of the catheter and tablet changes that had (apparently)  been made; they hadn’t told me either… at least, I don’t think they did.

I was working away on the blog, and it only being fifteen minutes since I emptied the bag; I didn’t check it for another half-hour or so.
I was well getting into the graphic making for the news snippets. Eventually, I thought, I’ll check the leg bag…
acci-whoop I had a heck of a job getting the trouser legs up above the mega-full, about-to-burst-looking pouch!.
I got caught out there! Emptied it, and washed, disinfected the bucket, and arrived.
She got the Peptac served up, and I washed the serving pot while she rang the Doctors to try and find out when the catheter is coming out, and if should I take the new course of antibiotics or not. But there was no answer. Sam said she was trying again later and would let me know the result.

I got a landline call from the beautiful DVT-Warfarin nurse, Hristina. She’s coming to see me on Wednesday to take a blood sample to test the INR level.
Of course, in my minds-eye, she’s coming to see me for ulterior romantic reasons. I can dream, can’t I? Hehehe!

I went to make another brew of tea, Thompson Punjana, this time.

Took this photo through the glass of the window in the kitchenette of the gloomy morning view.
It’s still drizzling out there.

Aha, another call coming in. I am popular today.
A Call from the Falls Team Leader.
She’ll be coming to see me on Friday around noon time or thereabouts, she said.

Five minutes later, another call came in.
This was from an Amazon driver, telling me that the Dettol order was coming today.
This, after yesterday’s email telling me that it had been delayed and the new ETA is Saturday 14th? Ten minutes later, it arrived!

The lift maintenance men are making all the same noises as last week, but not so loud. I think they have gotten lower down, thus further away.

On with the Goggle… no, Google search.
Got a couple, got the Rostis in the oven, and tweaked the graphics in CorelDraw.

Nosh, time now!
Ersatz bacon, tomatoes, Potato Rostis, BBQ sauce, oven-baked wholemeal bread, and a strawberry jam thingamajig dessert.
Overall Taste-Rating of 7.6/10.
I broke another bit off of a tooth again!

Settled to watch the TV, Heartbeat, a football match, then New Tricks. That was the plan, anyway.
I’d got a bottle of spring water, a bag of cheesy curls on the ottoman, and Heartbeat started. I stayed with it until the first set of advertisements came on.
Then drifted off to sleep.
..
Two hours later, chimed out, rudely awakening me from my precious sleep, and in came Carer Richard. Who got the medications given and checked the lights, taps and oven for safety. Then put the night pouch on the catheter.
We had a mini-chinwag session, and off he went, taking the waste bags with him for me on the way out.

I swiftly nodded off again… but it turned out to be yet another night of jumping awakes, drifting off again easily enough, only for repeated jerking awakes again. “I love sleep. My life has the tendency to fall apart when I’m awake, you know?”

Inchie Today: Wednesday 7th December 2022

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Woke at 07:20ish hrs: After what must have been one of the worst nights ever, for the repetitive nodding-off and jarringly springing waking again, minutes later!
Pains from and the bladder side of the stomach. This had me a smidgeon worried!
announced the arrival of , who seemed up for it, until the yawning began. He’s struggling to get sleep the same as I am. poor lad.
Richard got the medications given and went to check the non-prescription drawer for out-of-date products. Which resulted in two, I say two 15l carrier bags of stuff to throw away! He’s a good lad to me!
I had to nip into the wet room for the third wee-wee of the morning. The precious ones were flowing decently; this one was back to having to force things out and getting only a sprinkling… but this time with a difference. The stink was the worst I’ve ever smelt in 76 years of weeing! It was repugnant!
Not that I understand much about it, but I got the idea that now the flowing was starting again, the old stored liquid in the bladder may have been being forced out?
I mentioned it to Richard, who smiled and said I know. I smelt it and heard you cursing about it, talking to yourself! It really annoyed you didn’t it? I’ve never heard you swear so much! He was spot-on the button with his comment. Hehe!
I really thought the urine infection was on its way back.
Richard departed with the two bags of out-of-date medications and two bags of general waste with him for me. Richard even made me a brew of tea! He may call on me for the late check visit but was not sure. I hope he does, he always does his best to cheer me up and have a smile or two, and that’s precious! However tired he is.

As I got back to get the spud in the slow cooker, Herbert, my noisy neighbour above, started his bang-banging. I wonder what he’s making today?
I got to drinking the mug of tea that Richard made for me and gave me a good shake. Thus I spilt the mug of tea… she’s been so kind lately as well, but she caught me out this time. I swore, cleaned up the mess and made another one.
I took these shots of the view from the kitchen window while waiting for the kettle to boil again.

The top one had the moon just disappearing from view on the horizon. Why it came out so dark. I know not.

The second one was a mystery to me? How that one came out so light is another mystery to me!.

The third one came put as it looked to the eyes. The bottom field with the housing at the back, no wonder the frost, according to the computer, was -2°c!

The last one was another disappointment. I tried to brighten it a bit, but I ended up with a white sky, and still, the houses were unclear? .
started off next. But this didn’t bother me too much because the pains from the bladder seemed to be lessening. What’s going on in there?
Herbert went into another bout of almost musical banging about. I think he dropped a sledgehammer at one time. Hope he’s not injured himself at all.

It took me a long time, but I got the Tuesday blog updated and sent off to WordPress. Then, during an hours-worth run of wee-wee taking, I got the Pinteresting of some photos done.
WordPress Template preparing next. That went well. Then made a start on this blog.
arrived but did not press the door chime. I pointed this out to him, and we had a laugh about it. Made my point that I could have been using the bucket and needed to know when someone was about to come in to give myself time to shout not to come in yet. Still, a nice lad. We had a little natter and a laugh.

Ah, well, back up to Stage Two Red Hypertension again. Can’t win ’em all, can you? Well, I can’t. Hehe! It’ll be lower tomorrow, just you see! EQ told me, that he is rarely wrong.

Was getting noisy again. This time I replied with a clout of two of my own on the top of the high bookcase, but only the same amount of bangs and thuds that he’s sent down to me over the next few minutes. Not that it stopped his banging about, of course. Thud, clunk…

announced the arrival of . She told me the fire alarm was going off, but I could not hear it in the flat.
She issued the medications, and I asked her to check the taps for me on leaving. But I wouldn’t let her go until she told me the fire alarm had finished.
we took this photo of an engine sown below outside. Others arrived later.
The alarm was still ringing ten minutes later. A live one, mayhap, this time?
Carolynne and I went out into the flats’ lobby. I could hear the alarm going out there. I opened the door a bit, and both of us could smell burning!
I told her to come back into the flat until the alarm stopped. Which she did.
As we were both coming in, she said the alarm had stopped. Off she went. I hope the lifts were working again for her; I imagine they would have been turned back on now the alarm had stopped.

The temperature now showing is minus 1°c. I wonder why it keeps changing from Celsius to Fahrenheit?  Hello, it’s just changed to a snow warning icon?

There’s scum, and there is Scum. The lousy inhuman SCUM that can do this without checking or getting help, should be hung! Then again, I truly think that Parole Board members who free convicted killers to kill again should be hung as well.
I wonder what the shitbag’s reasons were? In a stolen car? No insurance? No licence? Wanted on a warrant? Drink driving? Or maybe all of these things.
I bet the judge lets them off with a dangerous driving charge.
Some smart-arsed lawyer will earn his money defending them and conning the condemnable judges in which we are supposed to have faith and belief. Until your daughter is killed by them again, as the overpaid pathetic Parole Board sets them free early on licence… Grrr!

Better get something to eat, then. Oh, I’ll check to see if any new figures have come through for Covid for Nottingham first. Aha, got to these numbers through the Nottingham Evening Post’s links. Not sure of the period it covers, but is the latest one on it.

Hello, hello, hello!
 and . Is this not a Boll-Weevil I have on my finger?
Gawd Blimey, please say no; I don’t want an infestation of them again!
This one was on the draining board in the kitchen. I shall keep my eyes peeled while making the meal for any more of the little blighters! Oh, please, no!

Oh, heck, I missed these pictures I took during the day.

The top one looks like late afternoon.

The middle one this morning?

Well, I think it was. Maybe, perhaps, possibly, mayhaps, presumably. in all likelihood and possibility, taking all things into consideration, it’s likely that I may be right or wrong…

The evening and last one, I think I took whilst  (I’m almost sure) was here with the fire engine viewing.

Of course, it could have been anytime, really.

This time, I must get the food prepped. A simple fayre for a simpleton fella! Cottage pie, the slow-cooker cooked for wight-hours big potato, with liquid smoke added to the spud, and BBQ sauce to the cottage pie. I don’t ask a lot... I don’t get much, either. Hahaha! But I did enjoy this dishful and the following Vegan Soya lemon yoghourts.

I then launched into mission-impossible mode! Trying to get to sleep and stay asleep. It was a bridge too far, an extremely difficult, nay, impossible, unattainable, forlorn, unexcogitable, hopeless task! I got the pots washed, and checks were done.

Within minutes of getting settled in the £300, used, second-hand shop bought nine years ago, c1966, discomfiting, alarmingly Kari-beige coloured, crumb containing, TV remote hiding, not working recliner, I floated off into what I thought was going to be, a deep sleep.

acci-whoop A few minutes later, I woke up calmly. (No jerking a jumping at all!) That was the end of my kipping!
My body was telling me I needed sleep. But, it was not to be.
I even put the TV on in hopes of the averts helping me to drop off. It didn’t help!
I lay there hoping, praying and swearing to myself, for Gawd knows how many hours.
Then around 07:10hrs in the morning, rang out and almost reluctantly, I limped to the door to let in.

HUMPH!

Inchcock: Saturday 12th November 2022

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So, listen to this, you may not believe it, my maties:
I woketh up and soon had it worked out that I’d been asleep for very nearly eight hours! EIGHT HOURS! Danged well staggering!
I didn’t write the time on my memory pad, but it was almost light when I went to make a brew and take these two photos through the kitchen window. I didn’t make the tea after all and made for the wet room to get the Ablutionalisationing done. Collecting the clothes needed for afterwards, with me. 
The teeth-cleaning triggered , and it bled a fair bit. The shaving went well, just two teeny-weeny nicks, and they didn’t bleed much at all.
At had to divert to the before getting into the shower. That didn’t go so well. A smidge messy, it seems that is making a fight out of it, for control of the evacuations with . He’s ahead at the moment, and a messy result that needed much cleaning up and disinfectioning.
Amazingly one of the tiny on the neck started bleeding after I’d looffered the back. It reminded me of that Hotel horror movie. Hehehe! I wanted to take a photograph cause it did look scary with the blood swirling around the drain. But I hadn’t taken the camera in with me. Shame, that would have looked great in the blog! Tsk!
Being as it was Saturday, I decided to put the jammies back on with the heavy dressing gown. No deliveries (I thought at the time), nurses, only the carers to come today. (How even I can forget that the Iceland order was being delivered today...
Made a brew, did the and on the computer to feed the figures in the analyser a create the graphics. In the Red Hypertension – 1 zone again, but not too far away from the Amber. Content with this.

 

 

 

The Iceland man cometh
I remembered he was coming the moment I saw that…

I got the bags inside and sorted them out. I did wonder why I’d bought
the Starbucks Coffee at first.
But as I went on sorting the other stuff out, I remembered!
It was on offer at very nearly half the normal price. So I thought I get some in, in case the carers or nurses like them.
I may have made a mistake. If they do like them, I can’t afford to get any more at the full price, like.

But I can’t really see anyone liking them; cold coffee?
Got the bottles of wine for Christmas pressies. Two items short, but no substitutes, so that was good. Bread and Vegan pie missing.

  Arrived: it was during this visit that I had a mind-blank, I think. I know I was talking almost non-stop… or was I? Oh, I don’t know.
Many hours later, I sort of came around a lot and found this was the only other photo on the SD card.
Nothing concrete in the memory box, but maybe I was seeing this and thought about how active and fun-loving I was in those days. Or, maybe even proud of winning my first-ever angling cup fishing match award? Most likely, I was feeling guilty for fishing in the first place?
I had been working on CorelDraw and Excel doing a blog. I had no idea what time it was, and as I turned to look at the clock…
Came in. I reckon I was nattering away again. As Jodie was picking up the bags to leave, she said she could not get in the key safe. I went out to her, and we both tried again, but no luck. Must mention this to Deana or Julie.

I took some photos of the evening view.

Better check on the taps and stove. make sure I’ve not left anything that might be during my absence of awareness hours.

I tried catching up[ on the blogging.
Spent a few hours at it and realised things were not going well.

Which brought to mind the appointment at the Mental Health place regarding Doreen Dementia.
The address is confusing and long-winded; I’ll have a look at the Google map if I remember.
Hazelwood House, The Coppice, Highbury Hospital, Highbury Road, Bulwell, Nottingham NG6 6DR.
The bits of the letters and pamphlets I can read (and forget so easily). tell me:
Bring your Medications, Eyeglasses & hearing aids.
Wear a face mask. Use your own toilet before leaving home.
Bring only one carer/relative with you.
Bring your own drink if needed.
You must arrive for your appointment early.
Try not to be more than 5-minutes early.
Use the hand-sanitiser on arrival.
During your appointment, a hand sanitiser is to be used.
Leaving Your Appointment:
When finished, a member of staff will walk you through
showing you the way out.
I’ll have a look at the map now.

Not confident; I can’t find which reception I’ll need.
Knackered now. No desire for food or drink.

Get my head down, I think. Hope I’m up to doing Josie’s meal in the morning.

Changed my mind as I was getting the jammies on. I needed a meal, after all.

I made up a meal that looked okay. But it wasn’t; I was not concentrating, methinks. The veggie burger and pastie were only warm at best. The sausages were undercooked. Taste: 3/10!
Still, didn’t visit, so I had a good sleep for once.

Monday 26th September 2020: Cartoon, Ode, Diary

TODAY’s POLITICAL FUN– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
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01:30hrs: I rose after a good three hours of uninterrupted sleep. And with yesterday’s Blood Pressure being the lowest ever, I dismounted the £300 second-hand, musty, Haemorrhoid Harold Testing, cringingly beige, crumb-covered, not-working, rickety recliner, and: ! Could I find the Boot’s Sphygmomanometer? Well, not for a while, no!
Confusion reigned in my ‘Under the control of Dementia Doreen’ brain. I have always put it at the back of the carer’s table for months. And never misplaced it before. I assume that with all the excitement of yesterday’s ‘Lowest-Ever recorded Blood Pressure, I may have lost concentration and placed it in a different place?
I went on a controlled Sherlock Holmesian search. Starting in this room, where it has to be, I thought.
However, a ten-minute hunt around failed to produce the errant recorder.
It must be in the kitchen, then? So off to the kitchenette and checked cupboards, drawers, and Good Heavens; I even looked in the oven, fridge and freezer. No luck!
Ah, thought I, remembering I went to the clothes racks in the junk room abbot that time. So I delved into the Steptoe & Son like spare room for a ferret om there. I even thought I’d have a look for the missing trouser belts at the same time.
I did find two belts. Which almost brought on a Smug-Mode, but then , when I found that both of the belts were now too small to go around my ever-ballooning waistline. I knew I had two belts that fitted last week and seem to think I hung them over the clothes racks, again no joy.
I continued searching for the belts, confident that I had left them in that room, no question in my warped little mind. (At the time) Half an hour later, I gave up and went to make a brew of Glengettie tea.

I tried to take a photograph of the morning view from the kitchen window, using the 15-second taking nighttime mode. But it came out like the one last week, fuzzy!
I shouldn’t bother, really, not with all the twitches, shakes and uncontrollable jerking of hands and legs. I’ll not try again. So, I moved the dial into SCN and chose the night option on that; Ah! much better this one was. I was pretty pleased with this one, but of course, the cataract can be misleading.
Put a splash of milk in the brew and hobbled back to the computer.
Asked myself, “Now, where was I up to?” I’d forgotten abbot the search for the missing Boot’s Sphygmomanometer. Huh! Getting side-tracked, losing the plot and simply forgetting things, I seem to have got into an art form nowadays! Well, the only places not searched were the hallway, three-wheeler-walker trolley, and the wet room. Back into Sherlock Holmesian Mode, I limped to the Hallway to investigate. Not on the waste bag box, not in the trolley basket. I was pretty confident as I went into the wet room… ‘Thud’; I clouted the shoulder on the doorframe again! Which, of course, immediately and painfully set off I dropped  Metal Micky, and when I bent to retrieve the stick, kicked off! I thought about becoming a gibbering wreck at this point, as my previously above-average contentment level sank towards a developing depression! Or could I just cry and carry on?

I rubbed some Phorpain Gel into the shoulder and looked around for absconded, escaped Boot’s Sphygmomanometer.
There was the machine with the razor and tackle with the toothpaste? I had to ask myself why? How? But I didn’t get an answer. I know that I missed shaving yesterday, and I am already concerned about doing so today due to the risk of cuts on the extra stubble. So how come I left the Boot’s BP unit in the wet room? I can only put it down to Dementia Doreen! That’s the Dementia that my Doctor refuses to recognise that I’ve got. Can anyone help? I sank even lower now! I should be pleased I’ve found the flipping Boot’s Sphygmomanometer, but things ain’t good. So, down in the mouth, I did the

Ah, yesterday’s result must have been a glitch. Back up in the red again today. In the Hypertension Red-1.
SYS 142, DIA 69, Pulse 88, and the body temperature at 36.7°f.
If you’d like to look at the Returns graph for the last seven days, the temperature has gone up by 0.1 for four days in a row now. Well, it’s consistent, if nowt else. Hehehe! Will tomorrow bring a reading of 36.8°f?

I got the computer on and got the call to the . That’s something else that’s variable, different in nature every sitting. Haha!

And it was today. Meatballs, no Torpedo, not almost liquid, and a pale Karki in colour. There was a heck of stink with it this morning. And talk about bleeding; I’ve not lost that much in a session for ages. A smidge worrying cause it wasn’t the deep red one usually gets and associates with, Not that there is any point in telling my doctor. If I walked into her surgery with my head under my arm, they’d make an appointment for three weeks’ time. Then it would be cancelled and rearranged for a fortnight later. Then I’d forget about it… Worra life!
Look at the Severe Frailty Assessment. I had one and failed it badly, and the doctor refused to accept the results. Because I didn’t have my hearing aids in. So made another appointment for six weeks later. My Bad, I missed it. They made another in three weeks’ time! Let me know two weeks later that it is being moved to two weeks later than planned. Last Saturday, actually. The Link transport phoned me on Friday and said we are picking you up at 0755hrs tomorrow, which surprised me; I wasn’t sure they worked on a Saturday. Come Saturday, no minibus arrived. The Doctors surgery phoned me about missing the appointment, and I got in a right muddle, and still am not sure if they made another appointment for me or not.

Minutes later this morning, another lady from Link called me to say my lift will be here ‘this morning’, at 08:00hrs? I explained about Saturday, and as told: “Yes, we don’t work on weekends” I asked politely; why I was told the lift would be with me, in the morning, on Friday? Not that I needed telling, well, I wasn’t told. A simple mistake by the caller with the days. But anguish and worry for me. Now in the bad books with of all places, the Doctors surgery again! Desperation makes me waffle; what can I do to get any help? The day was getting really light now. I went to the kitchenette and took the top photograph here of the cloudy sky.

Then this one downwards to the car park on Chestnut Way in front of Woodthorpe Court.
Then this one from the balcony. Straight ahead, I caught a piece of balcony plastic in this one.

I don’t know why I said that?
Then to the end window, which I failed to open, trapping my fingers trying to do so.
I surrendered and took the shot through the glass. It was at the far end of the car park.

Where parking on the no parking chevrons has become such a very popular activity amongst the tenants of these flats.
Arrived. I’d been looking forward to seeing him today as well. But disgustingly, all I did was moan and grumble about my plight at first. As soon as saw how tired out he was… the repeated yawns and the vacant look on his face gave me a clue. He was so worn out, poor devil. I don’t think he was listening anyway. Don’t blame him either, even though I’m sick a tired of my whinging! He got his treats; all the lad wanted was to get home and try and get some sleep. Wished him good luck as he departed.

I got on with updating the Sunday blog. I may have waffled on that too. sorry if I did the graphics needed, then made a start proper on this blog.

But concentrating was hard, as was at it again with his mechanical concertos. The noise was varied for a minute or two, decorated the tune with some clunk thuds. He serenaded me with some delightful whining noises, then back to the tap-tapping, with the odd thud thrown in.

I was struggling, so IO went on the WordPress reader to see what the bloggers had blogged. Ha-ha!

Cripes! Look at the time; where did it go?
Better get some food prepared!

Sadly, I used the last of the chips and no-fish fish sticks in this meal. By gum, those chips were good! I’d better get a JS order made up for next week – Oh, no, I won’t – Oh, yes, you will. Hello, is that Alto-Ego?
I decided not to; I’ve got instant mash I can use up.

+I put the tray on the Carer’s desk, and just . It was a wonderful experience… but ♫ Oh, Susana ♫ chimed from the door chime, and the Came in. I think it was Carer Jodie, but I was half asleep still. We might have had a little natter, but she had to go as she was running late. Went with there to the door and locked it was she left with her treats.

I got the pots washed, and doing this reminded me that I’d not yet done my , Tsk! So I did them.
So tired and blurry-eyed, yet things went well. Teeth, a very little bleeding, shaving, only three teeny-weeny nicks. And the showering was dizzy-free, with just one clunk on the powerbox with my forehead. Pretty chuffed with that!

Got into the night attire, and decided to do some work on this blog… But…

It used to amaze me how with Fries making such a pathetic mess of running Virgin Media, he go an increase in salary and bonuses. (see left graphic) He destroyed the good reputation of Virgin, which now gets an overall rating of 2 @ 5 on Trust Pilot!
But I’ve realised that this must be why: Mr Fries Artful deception, flimflam, hokum, prestidigitation, illusion, hocus-pocus, and mumbo-jumbo skills distort or blur any facts and figures. The man is a genius! That, or the top boss at Liberty-Global, must be extremely gullible?

So, I got down and had a long, losing battle with to get to sleep! Humph!

Inchcock Today: Diary & Odeing

Inchcock would like to start this blog with one of his more heartwarming efforts, Ode-wise. Sentimental, uplifting, exhilarating style of Odeing. It’s part of his self-declared “I’m fed up with hearing myself moan” policy. Thank you!

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Wednesday 3rd August 2020

I spent five hours head down in the recliner last night. If I got about three hours of sleep, I was lucky. One of the worst “Shoot awake & nod-off again” nights ever. At 07:45hrs, A real shaking of a wakeup, with the need for a wee-wee, forced me to scramble free of the c1966 recliner and over to the overnight bucket. I failed to get Little Inchie out in time! Gragnangles! Off to the wet room. I was in a bit of a state, so decided to get another stand-up wash and a change of PP’s naturally. I gave the shower a go, just to see if might work, but there was no noise from the drain-forcer, and the red light came on, so I quickly turned it off at the power again. A got a stand-up washing of the affected areas. New pants on, and back out to the kitchenette to get the kettle on.

Carried out. With another set of fantastic results to savour.

SYS a phenomenal 126!
DIA at 69

Pulse 82
Body temperature 33°f

Couldn’t ask for a better set of figures. Why, I’m down to near normal and in the green, to boot!
07:45hrs: Richard arrived, and he seemed in a slightly perkier mood today at first. But when he sat down, the yawning began again. After interrogating him, Hehehe! I discovered he’s had a bad night again.

He showed me the monitor the Diabetes clinic had fitted on his arm. He scans it twice a day, and the results go straight through to the hospital. True monitoring and a very natty system. Glad he’s got it, so a professional eye can keep tabs on his sugar level.

Not much time for nattering this morning, although he didn’t rush me at all. His body language and my EQ told me he wanted to get away early, and that’s fair enough for me. Hobbled him to the door, where he picked up the waste bags. Made sure that he’d got the bag of treats and wished him some sleep as we parted.

I spent hours on getting this blog template started, but it was hard work; the eyes are not so good, and it was a medley of mistakes, errors, correcting, and then finding the corrections were wrong as well! Time flew by, and I had so many breaks for wee-wees that I thought they would never stop! They didn’t, but did slow down a little after 14:00hrs!

My toffee-nosed, self-important, nyaff, noisy neighbour above kicked off with venom. And continued on and off, firth next five hours. Still, it’s nice to know he’s still alive.

The rumbling innards suddenly got more volatile, with involuntary emissions of wind from the hind quarters. And off on a hobble to the Porcelain Throne. One of the oddest visits in a long time. I got sat down on the Throne, and much wind escaped, but nothing else. I waited patiently, having a go at the crossword; for some reason, I could read the clues with less difficulty than usual. There’ll be a reason for that. If you find it, can you let me know, please?
Anyway, I gave up. got the pants and trews back on and was opening the wet room door, and winds started coming again, accompanied by the rumbling and grumbling innards. Back onto the Throne… for a repeat performance. seems likely that Constipation Konrad is in charge of the bowels, then? Another surrender, with that feeling that something has to, or will erupt at any time now. Most uncomfortable!

As I got into the hallway, with perfect timing, I was only two feet away from the panel: and the intercom rang forth! Yes, YES, it was the plumber arriving to investigate the shower!!!

He was a nice, patient chap. Listened s I explained at I was doing when the alarm went off, and he investigated for me. Five minutes later, he’s got the shower working again. And took the time to tell what had gone wrong with it. A filter had been blocked, and he’s changed it, well cleaned it up, good as new. Explained to me that if a lot of people use the showers at the same time, especially in the higher flats, sometimes the pressure changes. If this happens again, turn it off, and try again in a few minutes. I thanked him and insisted he take a cold drink from the fridge in thanks. Grrreat!

Put some potato cubes in the oven and made an order for Morrisons via Amazon for tomorrow morning. Then got the potatoes in the oven. I’m just having the spuds with some of Jenny’s donated tomatoes, I think. After eating this, maybe I can get some catching-up sleep. But, will I be able to?

MEMORY BLANKS:
Found this photo in the morning. Not the foggiest memory of making it or eating it… But when I saw this, a taste of the veggie burgers came into my mouth.
I think I liked it. Haha!.

Memory regained: When woke me up when she arrived. Obviously, I must have fallen asleep. I was so drowsy after she stirred me that maybe I’d just got off to sleep? It took me awhile to get things together? I remember getting her a cold drink from the fridge and Valerie leaving, then it was head down again… That was it until 00:20hrs when I woke in need of a wee-wee…

A most peculiar evening.

Inchcock Diary & Ode to Putin, Tuesday 7th June 2022

Tuesday 7th June 2022

07:30hrs: Woke wanting a wee-wee. I thought it would never come; it must have been 15hrs without one. It was hardly worth it, a painful sprinkle or two. At least the bladder is working again, so fingers crossed!

I set, too, giving myself a medical MOT. And taking ‘As needed’ non-prescription medications. There is no need for ointmentating this morning, No Little Inchies fungal lesion or Harold’s Haemorrhoids bleeding whatsoever! Excellent results on the blood pressure machine, best for ages!

The only thing not so good was the body temperature. That was way down low again. Been under the NHS’s recommended 35°c for a few days now. I don’t feel poorly; I am a lot chirpier in myself this morning. Although I felt so cold when it obviously isn’t?

I took some under-tongue CBS oil. And a Hemp capsule too.

Got the ears well saturated with the Olive oil. Let it sink in, and then I filled up the canals with more. This never seems to help, but I’ve got into the habit of doing it each morning now.

Then took a Dioctyl to help skid up the darned Porcelain Throne evacuations. Messy. Gooey, watery! Eurgh!

I got a few Warfarin tablets ready, so the carers will have some available for the evening doses.

Then, had a bash at syringing both ears. Not only a total waste of time; I failed to remove any wax at all, but I made such a mess I had

to clean up the water that had sprayed out off or missed the ears! Hehe!

Got the kettle on and sorted the laundry, not forgetting that talk-a-lot Esther would give me some hassle if it wasn’t ready and sorted when she arrived later this morning! Not that she scares me an anything like that, of course. Ahem!

I took this snap of the lovely morning sky with its ever-changing hues. Mother Nature, again shows us her beauty! The beauty we have been destroying for years.

Got the computer on and started on the WordPress reader and commenting, and the ♫ Oh, Susana ♫ chime brought forth Carer Richard. I thought the lad was late coming; he’s had extra calls on again and was in a rush because he had a four-hour training session later when he finishes work with the Diabetes team to get through. No time for any good natterings today again. I think he felt guilty about it, so I tried to cheer him up, wished him all the best, and gave him a bag of treats. Then, I walked (well, hobbled) with Richard to the lift lobby and wished him well for the meeting.

Took this photo of the car park in front of Woodthorpe Court from the kitchenette window. Made a brew of Glengettie tea and was about to return to the computer with the nug of tea – but circumstances changed…

As usual with Neuropathy Pete, his timing caused the optimum amount of pain and hassle. An involuntary right-leg Neuropathic Schuhplattler drop-something and flail-about dance made me drop the cup as I grabbed Metal-Micky and the side of the sink to keep from going over. Once more, it was over in seconds, but I still managed to clout my knee on the edge of a floor cupboard. Which awakened Cartilage Cathy in agony! Humph!

Sorted myself out and took an extra Codeine. And fond this photo of a meal from which I can’t work out? It was not a good photo in any way, shape or form, so it might be one that I meant to delete from the file?

Started on the Snippets blog, and the Iceland delivery arrived. I let him in through the intercom box in the hallway, and I cleared a path to put the bags into.

The driver took the bags through to the kitchen for me. Gave him a choice of plonk cans in thanks. He opted, I noticed, for the Rum and coke. Hehe! Good for him; I hope it cheered him up a smidge.

They sent the Rustlers for Richard, sugar snap peas, mushrooms and some new Pork & Pickle Bites. Three for a fiver, so they must be good. One for Josie, one for Richard and one for Esther. I got some small apples that, hopefully, my lesser-teethed mouth can manage to eat. Har-har! They had no small vine tomatoes in stock but have sent me a pack of large tomatoes, Dutch, that had a sell-by date for today. No charge!

The best thing they had sent was the No-Moo ice creams and No-Bull burgers. The best of any burgers I have tried! The ice cream is by far superior in taste to what one might call natural ice cream. Grrreat Flavour both! I’d have ordered more, but I dared not with Iceland’s record of crap unrelated substitutions!

I had another go at getting the Snippet Ode done. (I did get it finished, but not until I’d been grafting on it, on & off, for another nine hours!) Esther arrived and came talkingly into the room. She still wasn’t near enough for me to hear her, and I feared that she may have something vital as she went into the hall, front, and living rooms.

It’s not so bad when she’s face to face and not shouting at me rather than talking to me. Esther, bless her, has a habit of talking and carrying on. Esther keeps talking to me from the rear of my ear lobes as she turns away… the peace and quiet are nice. But there is always danger in this… She has a great memory and thinks because she’s told me something, I must have heard it and will remember it. (Both are impossible in my condition, Haha!)

Then, a week later, I get an ear-bashing from about 4 inches distance and am informed that “I told you that last week!” telling offs. Luckily I can rest assured that Esther will nip off into the other room to have a nosey around my boxes and occasionally iron a shirt… but talking to me all the time from the other room… still, I knew what to expect. Hehe! Obviously, I had forgotten something or not heard it. I’m glad I got the pork & pickle thingamabobs for her now. Giving her then assuaged her aggression. I joke, of course… Erm? She’s an angel, really.

I got the ready meal into the oven and had roughly 40 minutes before it was cooked. I must not fall asleep!

Back to doing the blog, I trudged. ♫ Oh, Susana ♫ rang out, and I wearily (Mentally) went to the door. It was Josie, returning the tray and things for me from the Sunday meal. Bless her cotton socks; she enthused over the taste of this Sunday’s chilli stew! That cheered me up a bit! She even asked if I used to be a chef? Oh dearie me! My EQ was nervous at this. Naturally, I had no idea why at the time. A feeling of foreboding matured…

I got on with the Snippet blogging again! So deep in concentration… still making errors after cock-ups, though. Then it dawned on me that the food was in the oven!!!

Grade A: It looked like this after I’d burnt my fingers getting the tray out of the oven post haste! Not good, is it? But I was so tired and weary that I still used it and made a meal of sorts out of it.

I added some BBQ sauce to the tray. Got some slices of Milk Roll bread, tomatoes and sugar snap peas onto the tray.

I was part mad at myself, well darned annoyed with myself, and so tired and drained, I didn’t get too agitated. Yet I still laughed at myself as I tried to dismantle the encrusted burnt meal to get at some edible bits of food. It helped in having some bread and sauce to soak some resuscitated bits to eat.

By the time I’d finished burnt food mining, which was tasty, believe it or not, bits of burnt food had been scattered far and wide on my stomach folds, down the pants, on the tray, and on the floor and recliner cushion. The carpet took on a new design; there were many black, ash-like bits of residue on it. I faced a long task in getting things sorted… and the kitchen and oven needed cleaning attention as well.

I was all in by the time I got things semi-put right. I made a brew of Thompson’s Punjana tea and ate a huge bowl full of veggie ice cream! I finished it and lay there as I dropped off to sleep – it was so good that I think I dreamed of sleeping…

♫Oh, Susana♫ Chimed out, and Carer Valerie came in. I’d been up and about for around 12 hours by then, and waking up after five minutes of sleeping was not what I wanted… Hehehe! I remembered to give Valerie her Pork & Pickle whatsits, though.

I felt awful but could not resist the urge to finish the blog. The internet went down… now I was getting annoyed!

I pressed on and got the Snippets blog finished at long last. It stayed that way; it was now gone midnight! I realised then that I had not done the ablutions today!

Humph!

ODE TO PUTIN

Is it true that hopes and expectancies are always there?
Putin’s are conspicuous, World Domination, I fear…
He’s somewhat of a Worldwide parcel courier?
Soon, bigger, dirtier packages will be sent, and nuclear…
Where will the scumball strike next? Europe and Asia, it’s unclear…
Anywhere, somewhere, possibly a country that’s weaker?

Is it true that he wears a lemon and pink brassier?
Shags Igor Sechin, his First Deputy Prime Minister?
He laughs at citizens dead or gathered for warmth around a brazier,
The man could not be any more selfish and crazier!

I insult the shithead cause there’s nothing else I can do…
But I would, if I could, send him a can of poisoned Irish stew,
I wonder if he likes it from his minions in his rear?
He’d like to make his competition dead or disappear?
What competition? He’s got more weapons & forces than we do…
He’s more soldiers in Moscow’s Red Square!

We cannot afford to send troops there…
We’ve not got enough, nor has anyone else, to be fair…
I wish we could send him Tony Blair…
Notice he’s not volunteered to do any damage repair?
Putin offers and hopes only for death and despair…
To the rest of the world, we can only die or forebear…
Unless you bribe him if you’re a financier?
Then he just might take a fancy to yer?

Nemo Mortalium Omnibus Horis Sapit

Inchcocks Selected Whoopsiedangleplops of the day

ONE

SOCK GLIDE-GLENDA

Absolutely!

This morning, I used Sock-Glide-Glenda, rather unwisely,
I felt confident and assured that I could use it injury-free!
I wanted to prove I’ve no need to be nervy…
Sure, that I had the ability, guts, and dexterity!
I thought this task to be just a formality…
Where I got this idea from also confused me!

It was going along pretty well, almost easy peasy!
But my confidence in my abilities turned into nihility…
Stepping out of frame, I lost my feelings of sensitivity,
And tumbled onto Glenda… tempting moribundity!
Scratches, bruises, welts… such a pity…
I soon lost my earlier orotundity!
I really am a liability!


Although the welt is morphing into putrefaction…
Add the bruised on the head for precision,
I came out in fair nick from this Accifauxpas action…
I’ve had no severe reaction…
It just spoils my good looks and beautification!

TWO

The Iceland Food Cometh!

No unavailable substitutes, things looked good,
The driver took the bags to the kitchen…
Thanked him, can of pop given, as I should…
The stomach wounds show no signs of blood…
I’d ordered some beef chunks, priced very good,
Went to get the fodder away as I would…
Then I saw the beef; some pieces looked like wood!
The rest were coloured red, as they should!

Above is the photo I took of one of the packs of need. Some pieces looked like cannabis colours blocks; the others looked fine. Opening up the pack, still in date, the texture of the CBD Hemp looking ones (about 30% of the contents!); was of an entirely different texture to the others? Things got me a little hot under the collar; when I checked the other two trays, they all had the Cannabis coloured chunks in them. I visited the Iceland site, and I checked the email that Iceland had sent…

I tried through the internet and found a page where they said I could email them… Fine, I thought, I’ll do that then… I’d got the details needed and went through a mammoth set of questions to finally get down to the email Iceland section at the bottom… But No! There was a list of reasons for the email, and one had to be selected. Otherwise, it didn’t let me get to the email page. Grumph!

So, I had to try the landline.

Dialled the number, and it was answered quickly… I waited… By a recorded message telling me they were experiencing a large number of calls and spent a few minutes telling me how I could contact them on the web, even recommending that I do that.

But not for long; the recorded message chappie interrupted the kip-the-sods-waiting music, which seemed like every minute. “If you want to know where your delivery is, phone…” Then next time something like – it was hard to hear him) “If you wish to question any charges… ring” – Followed by “A list on all new products re available at ……… .com” I had about ten of these interruptions.

Eventually, I got a real person to talk to. But hearing what she was saying was a nightmare! I answered all the details asked of me. I didn’t know how many pimples I had on my bottom, so I couldn’t answer that one… Hahaha! Only joking!

After only 20 minutes of the call being answered, I thanked her for her help. I’ve no idea why. I hadn’t got the foggiest notion of what was going to happen. But did catch ’email mentioned a minute before she rang off? So anticipate getting one (email) about a refund… or not, if I’ve got it wrong again…

I got this Email shortly after laundry and ironer Esther had gone. She kindly brought me the numbers to ring Amazon about the misleading information about my deliveries. Bless her.

And here we go…

Three

Amazing Amazon Cock Up

They told me as below on the tracker thingamajig. That the Galpharm Capsules would arrive on 20th – 21st April. They were delivered last Thursday 14th April). More of concern, they told me the Throw had been delivered last Saturday? I have not arrived yet! And was originally due on the 23rd of April. Confusion reigns?

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Four

Things started well; I oiled the ears to make them less waxy,
But they were still solid; the oiling failed dismally,
I syringed in water, which worked satisfactorily…
I waited for anything happening, cynically…
The noises from the canals became sort of crackly,
I viewed the treatment as failed – somewhat sceptically!

Nasal clearing, Germoloiding, Germolening… carefully…
All going okay; I Pain Gelled my knees and ankles easily…
Got the eye drops in… well, practically… but woefully…
Some got into the eyes, but with Shaking Shaun’s ability…
I got most of it down my cheek into my mouth, literally!

Then came the Blood Pressure taking…

Then onto the sphygmomanometerisationing,
In other words, the blood pressure taking…
The results lately have been astounding…
The last eight tests, all within a high rating…
But only just, nothing worth worrying about…

Flibbledonkackles! & Spurgledamnations!

Great Balls Of Fire!

Bloody Nora, what a shock!
This made me clench my buttock!
And my bladder wanted to unlock!
Hehehe!
I’ll have to ponder and take stock?
I checked the NHS site, like a shot!

Computer on, I entered details in the NHS, BP chart…
My result was off the scale; I passed an unintentional fart,
But I felt well pretty well, as best I could tell…
Leave it; check again later? Is that smart?
Listen to some music, perhaps some musical art?
Joannes Chrysostomus Wolfgangus Theophilus Mozart,
He was only 39 when from this earth he did depart!
I’ll go on the NHS helpline, well, it’s a start…

This message came on the screen after I pressed the ‘Go’ button to see the graph. Automatic response, mayhaps?

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A typical day for an old one like me… ruminations…
Frustrations, Whoopsiedangleplops, abominations,
Lack of socialisation and communications…
Accifauxpas, injury collecting, misread intonations,
The mind’s acute lack of clarity and precision!

Deafness, warping conversations,
Confirmation of hypertension…
Worries about the yobbo’s flat intrusion,
The brain is confused between reality and illusion…
A nasty, Thought-Storm invasion,

But odd things that baffled yet pleased me?
A movement in my loins, the first since 2003!
A yearning to have back my 4×4 Panda Sisley?
I wanted a pan of streaky smoked bacon, crispy…
Needing the dentist to repair my cavity…

Hate: Dementia Doreen, for causing such deficiency,
Denying my once held abilities, from logicality…
Ensuring my confidence less, and other disabilities…
My memories fade, but old ones remain: A malady?
Not knowing what time & day it is, is not an abnormality!

Failed & deferred appointments, like with the audiologist,
A Doctor who I’ve forgotten what she looks like?
The Ophthalmologist, no appointments were missed…
That’s cause I haven’t had one yet, about which I’m pissed!
Three cancellations from the phlebotomist…
Just the one from the immunopathologist,
Four from the Gerontologist, Two for the dentist…
The DVT clinic, four from the neuropathologist…
Could I get help from a psychiatrist or hypnotherapist?
A couple more to put on the cancelled list!
I must stop moaning… I must desist!

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